A/N: Hello, everyone. Here I am with a follow-up series to my first two stories. This will not just have a forgiveness plot from the Louds. No, no. There will also be a mockumentary format. And another story arc is new, non-canon characters introduced, and settling into their new lives too. And they're settling with some changes, too, obviously. If there's anyone who hasn't read my first two stories, go read those first yourselves, because there will be spoilers talking about those. Also, this story's chapter's will basically largely have parodies and re-tellings of other works. That's up for you to decide what they are of. Now without further ado, the first chapter of my story. Like my first published fanfiction, this will also be visually in traditional animation (as well as all future Loud House works, same for the spin-off). And unlike the authors of the following Loud House stories, Losing Him, No Such Luck, No Such Love, The Inner Beast, and All Good Things, I will have this story finished (if mostly nothing stops me). One last thing, this takes place one day after It's The Loud Catscratch Casagrandes Pony. I apologize for all the time I took to make this. May the first chapter satisfy you.
Note: I do not own The Loud House.
Lincoln Loud was sitting in front of a camera in the front yard, as he looked straight at the interviewer.
"So, exactly why are you here again?" He asked.
"We approached Lynn Loud Sr. last month. We were asking to interview him late this month, we're making episodes for a documentary TV series about big families, showcasing their lives, exploring the upsides and downsides of living in them. It's called, The Big Family Trees." The man said.
"Right, right. I was told he was approached during work at his restaurant. He was given a short summary, he became attracted, he signed the contract quickly and efficiently without bothering to analyze. He didn't even ask his wife." The boy snarked from saying that last sentence.
"That's right. He didn't look at the fine print, so now, he and his family are obligated to show us their lives, and learn different things about them. Even though you came back through a portal, from another universe, and most of you look like you were mauled by cats."
Lincoln scoffed. "I wouldn't say mauled. At least, not just that. But the universe we were sucked into, did have talking cats."
"Yeah, the news stories did mention that. They spread like wildfire. They also said you gained some sort of shapeshifting power from chemicals, right? A power that can turn you into a big cat?
"Ooh yeah."
"So, Lincoln Loud, what's it like to live with a big family?"
"I'm not going to dress it up. It was stressful, and noisy, thus, the noise fits the last name, Loud. Not to mention, I ended up as the target of my sister's less than good treatment when it counted."
"Like what, for instance?"
"I was blamed for clogging the toilet (it didn't help that I was known to genuinely clog the toilet more than once), and it was on the same day I wanted to go to an Ace Savvy convention. Also, my sisters made fun of me for my love of Ace Savvy and dressing up as him. But it wasn't me this time who clogged the toilet. It was my emo sister, Lucy. She was clogging the toilet with a Princess Pony book. I could've reported her, but instead, I took the blame for her. That was the duty of being a big brother. And what do I get for it? It's not like she showed that she takes me more seriously. Anyway, I got grounded for Lucy's actions. The family didn't find out the truth for years, until some past days ago."
"And, during that whole event, did your parents ever defend you?"
"Not really. Lynn Sr. was quick to believe I was the cause the whole time."
"Why do you call him that instead of 'Dad'?"
"I had enough with the girl's antics, and the parents taking their sides lots of times. I disowned mostly everyone as my family, even the parents. Now I only call them by their first names. The baby, Lily is the only girl who I consider as family. For another instance of me being the target of their antics, more than once, they barge into my room, yet, I should just stay out of their room. I should be respecting their privacy. But noooooooo, there's nothing wrong with them, in their eyes, to just burst into my room, whether or not I was asking any of them over."
"Your life must be crappy, huh?"
"It sure does sound like that, even on paper. Rita and Lynn Sr., they didn't do enough right by me. A number of times, they'd take the girl's side. And don't get me started on the time I was suffering a day of the sister fight protocol, a protocol I was not informed of before, at all. Yet my parents knew. And they just hid in their room, letting the girls sort it out. It started with Leni and Lori being mad at each other, over a dress. I was restricted from the kitchen, the living room, and then my room. You should've seen it for yourselves. I wanted to help, yet the girls just wanted me to stay out of the way. You should've seen how they all calmed down, after a process of the girls turning against each other, and they calmed down, after I left the house. How fun." Lincoln said sarcastically at the end. "After a number of years of being treated like dirt, I finally had enough. I was a doormat in life for too long. Now, I'm standing up for myself. I'm not taking their crap any longer. But I'm willing to give most of the Louds a chance to work hard to earn my forgiveness. But for now, I have to live with them, however long they take to earn it. Lynn Sr. and Rita have already changed their ways, they're willing to become better parents and do better. Heck, they have forbidden the girls to do variable activities and things, especially inside the house, like Luna playing her music at the highest volume, and they had the girls put lots of their possessions in the garage. I felt sorry for the girls there, anyway. The apology from Lynn Sr. and my older sister Lynn Jr. before all of this was a start. I have to find my talents. I feel drawn to doing art, and in past days, I've been using Lynn's punching bag in the garage, with some boxing gloves I bought for myself. I'm practicing to become a better fighter, at least in terms of wrestling. I've also been learning to skateboard. There was a first time I've tried that, when me and my best friend, Clyde, were looking for a new thing to do, as we were getting older." Lincoln laughed afterwards. Suddenly, a frisbee flew past him. "Lincoln, watch out!" A girl's voice shouted. Lincoln turned his head and ducked, as a frisbee flew past him. "Lynn, stop that! What did your parents say?!"
*Cue a flash of white, then Lynn Jr. and Lincoln are in front of the camera. Two captions under them, display their names as they appear.*
"Uh yes, we're filming your for a documentary. It explores big families."
"Why does she have to be here? This is currently my interview. It only centers on me."
"Lincoln, just calm down. You are giving us a chance. I should've known the crew's equipment was here."
"Yeah, well this is expensive equipment. We can't afford to have to pay for these things." Lincoln then took in deep breaths and let them out 3 times. "Okay, I'm calm."
"You want to know our personalities?" Lynn asked the interviewer.
"That's one of the things we want to know, from different families. There are a few crews in different parts of the globe, filming other big families as we speak. So, Lynn Jr., what are you like?"
"Uh, I used to be a superstitious person. And I'm a tough person, I'm a sportsgirl. Of course, I used to be a sore loser, if you ever play a board game with me and win. I was also a sore winner. I got to work on both of those."
"Not to mention, she caused trouble at a hockey game before she was dealt with." Lincoln added.
"Yeah, yeah. Another thing about me, I was bullied when I was in middle school. It was not a comfortable time, it was quite troublesome. I became tough to handle high school. Although, I ended up too tough. I can be a problem when it counts, ultimately. At some point, I came to be superstitious, and used to believe in gods of sports."
"Gods of sports, huh? That's crazy." The interviewer replied.
"Hmm, yeah. You can say that again." Said Lynn.
"Among the changes that the parents in this family have made, they threatened to spank us if we acted contrary to the changes. But for me, later, yesterday, they told me they thought about it, and decided to just have me simply grounded for variably any amount of time, depending on what type of immoral plan I made."
"Really?"
"Yes. I happen to be intelligent enough to make plans. I'm good at making plans, too bad I don't completely think my plans through, so that my plans don't end up failing."
"Are there any other talents you have, Lincoln?"
"I'm great at playing video games, great at playing chess, and I should learn how to bull ride, for example. I have been gaining an interest in bull riding. In fact, I've been watching it since previous days ago."
Lynn Sr. is in front of a stove at the restaurant he owns, as he is being filmed. *Cue a caption of his name under him.*
"What's it like living with the family you came to increase, as your children were born?"
"Well, it can be difficult. They were noisy, a lot, until we cleaned up our acts, and got them to end it once and for all. Not to mention, the girls were prone to fighting when it counted. And, it can be hard to focus on all of them in spending time with them, especially when it comes to homework. And they have fought during one time when Lincoln found a coin."
"That is brutal."
"Yeah, but we had them set to work in the attic after that. Of course, so was Lincoln, but, it should've been just the girls in retrospect. In terms of personality, I can be nice. But I'm not perfect. I can get quite scared, I can be immature, I also got so obsessed with a new van when we were getting a replacement. Not to mention, I was quite emotional when at first it seemed like our youngest daughter, Lily, preferred my next door neighbor over me."
"I see. Have you always owned a restaurant?"
"Not really. I used to work as an IT, and then as a chef in another restaurant, until I was finally able to start my own. You should've seen the kid's ideas mixed in with each other on opening day. It was too much for me to handle." Lynn Sr. laughed at the end.
"Do you and your wife have a stable relationship?"
"Oh, our relationship is, eh, difficult when it comes to handling our kids, at times that count. Plus, we didn't do enough right by our only son. Lots of times. Did he ever tell you I was quick to believe he clogged the toilet when it was actually Lucy?"
"Indeed, he did."
The Loud patriarch looked down in shame. "That's not one of my proudest moments. Okay, I'm going off-topic. My wife and I have a half decent relationship. We love each other, but things won't always be positive between us. And she's more competent than me. For example, there was a time she and I made an exchange to switch places, twice, when our house was infested with termites. Please don't ask. Also, there's the time that she did something less than honest, trying to get herself into community service, by doing illegal things, and she simply didn't ask me for help in dealing with her life. Okay, actually, our relationship is mostly good. We are willing to help each other out. But now, we're taking a bigger step, actually doing better jobs as parents. We will not simply side with just one side all of the time. We have ended the girl's activities in the house and in the yards, like Lynn Jr. playing ball games when she could break a window, limiting Lori's time on her phone, having Luna not play her music so loud in the house, the list goes on."
"How close are you to your children?"
"I'm close to some of them. But I'm not even any little bit close to others. I'm definitely not close enough to Lincoln, that's for sure. But, we do bond in watching the show, Legends. I need to bond with him more anyway, the others too. Meanwhile, me and my wife are looking for a therapist, but there aren't any we can find that we can afford, unfortunately. Therapy can help us understand each other better. Not to mention, we must get to know each other. Ultimately, we don't know a lot about each other."
"Interesting. What daughters do you spend time with the most?"
"Mmm, Luna, Lori, Luan, for example."
"I see."
*Now, Rita Loud is in the living room, with Lynn Jr. and Lana, just as Lincoln is coming in, and sits on the couch. *Cue captions of all of their names appearing in the shot*
"So, do you guys, uh want a drink or something?"
"No, thanks. We're fine. Thanks, anyway."
"Well, I'll be sure to provide some snacks and drinks for you, if you feel like having them."
"We brought our own food for the moment, Madam. Thank you, though. Rita, are you happy with your family as it was?"
"Honestly, there are times my children can be troublemakers, depending on the situation. But, in spite of their faults, I love all of them. But now, I can see clearly now that they all absolutely need to be set straight. In fact, I didn't do my part enough of actually being a parent, when it came to my daughters. I blamed Lincoln for him and his sisters getting banned from the grocery store, when I should've heard everyone's side of the story. I also should've stepped in a lot sooner when the kids were in a dispute, going on strike, until someone would've taken the duty of taking out the trash. Our house was made filthy before it was cleaned out. It's not one of my proudest moments." Said Rita.
"Oh man."
"Not to mention, there's an instance of Lincoln getting antagonized by his sisters, was getting pranked into doing favors for all of them, when he was trying to have some peace and quiet with some new earplugs he had bought. He thought he would be dealt with misery from Lola (she's one of the more problematic children), if he didn't live up to something he thought he promised her. That prank she pulled, it was quite uncalled for. Me and my husband, Lynn were too slow to be more serious, and to see how messed up our family clearly was. And our children don't know a lot about each other either. It's really sad. Well no more. Me and my husband are turning over a new leaf. We are determined to change ourselves and our kids for the better. We're trying to find an affordable therapist, but we've either been too forgetful, occupied in life, or couldn't find one who's affordable. I want my son to succeed in life. I want him to live a happy life. Whether or not he sees himself as such. I'm willing to do my part to make it up to him."
"As for me, I have to deal with using my own talents, giving most of the Louds a chance to prove themselves, and trying to control this shapeshifting power I've gotten. Lisa already took a blood sample from me. She sent it to the university, and the scientists will work hard to concoct an antidote to restore me to normal. The sooner I get restored, the better. I can only hope it doesn't take too long." Said Lincoln.
"I wasn't rather one of the best sisters to him for a long time. At times, I go into sparring with him when he doesn't want to, and he, Dad, and Luan came with me to a hockey game, when I was superstitious. I didn't let him do his own activities at times that counted, I made fun of him at times, me and my sisters ganged up on him at times. I was irresponsible in more ways than one. Well, no more. As long as I live up to it, I'm done not taking responsibility for my mistakes." Lynn Jr. said.
"I was one of the sisters who Lincoln was close to." Lana spoke up. "He doesn't like it when I'm doing disgusting things, like diving into trash and eating it (that's another thing my parents have had me end), but he and I were close. We had a good time with the two of us, when I was introduced to a video game that he was playing. I also introduced him to a made film that I made on how me and my frog, Hops came to live with each other. We also had a fun time at Dairyland, we won a trip to it, after something related to a beauty pageant. Let's just say, winning the trip was the best part. Lincoln tried to teach me how to be like Lola, but he decided to let me be myself. That was rather sweet and kind of him."
Lincoln just had a blank face through all of this. "Well, good for you, Lana. But indeed, you had fun." He said calmly. The boy soon got up. "My life is not only hard at home, but also at school. Like the time I had to do a going green challenge, when I live in a big family who uses lots of energy, and then there's the time Lisa was in my class, and people were expressive about Lisa being smarter than all of them and directing it at me." He walked out of the living room, as everyone else looked sadly at him. Some more bad memories came to them in their minds, concerning when Lisa was in Lincoln's school. Lincoln's voice then spoke in the background, as Lincoln left the house, and was getting his bicycle.
"I don't understand why life has to be so unfair to me. I can understand it's wrong for me to make immoral decisions, but do I have to end up facing such consequences like getting chased by dogs, getting blamed by Lisa's teacher when her classmates got sick, sweating when I'm making it up to my sisters after putting my social standing aside when my sisters went back to wasting energy after some jerkish boys came over to my house? Ask the students at the school. I'm sure they can tell you 'Lincoln's a loser', 'Lincoln's a fool', 'Lincoln's a dork', 'Lincoln's this, Lincoln's that.' Lincoln's me, man. Let me be me. When was that going to start happening?" At the end of his sentence,
Lincoln got onto his bicycle, and pedaled away from the house.
Outskirts of Los Angeles, CA.
*The camera pans over and across the undeveloped land, and displays different shots of the city.*
"You want to know what I'm famous for? I'm pretty famous among farmers, as exactly what I live as. I live my life as a farmer." A voice said (the voice is by J.G. Quintel).
*Cut to a man with long, dark brown hair, some of his hair was resting on his shoulders, wearing a Navy blue beanie, black pants, and a thick, navy blue long sleeve shirt (in fact, he had well-built arms). He looks like J.G. Quintel. He's standing in front of a farm house.*
"Lots of people live in the suburbs. But me, I find suburban life to be overrated. My name is Caleb Regular. I used to go on some field trips to farms in preschool and elementary school. I was attracted by the animals. From those days on, I wanted to become a farmer. But ever since getting my first books on learning how to become a farmer, I was surprised that there was more to farming and agriculture (as I learned the word later), then just working with animals. Not to mention, I was a little bit above hardly able to adapt to suburban life, although I know for sure I can handle that now, but that's something about me for you. I was a person who wanted to live a peaceful life. A peaceful, quiet life, and I would be my own boss. But I wouldn't live my farming life, nor my personal life alone." Said Caleb. Pretty soon, a woman came to his right side. This woman had long, medium tan hair, her hair was down. she was wearing a shirt, the top half was dark violet, the bottom half was a lighter shade of violet, and black pants.
*Her name, Amanda, appears underneath, as she and Caleb put their arms around each other.* "Meet my wife."
"Hi." Amanda (voiced by Ginnfer Goodwin) said, waving her hand.
"So, exactly when did you two meet each other?" Asked a female interviewer.
"It's actually a funny story." Caleb answered. "We met each other when I was doing an errand for a friend of mine, when I was in middle school. I was shopping some things for him at a grocery store. He lived a few feet away from it, but he was too sick to go, but he said this errand was urgent. I was on my way to the cash register aisle, but then all of a sudden, this woman collides into me, because she was in a rush. She was buying several products that were on a rollback sale, and I learned she didn't want to deal with traffic on the way back."
"Mhm. That woman happens to be me. As we were picking up our things, we introduced ourselves to each other. I learned his name was Caleb, and I told him that my name was Amanda Regular."
"Amanda Regular?" The interviewer asked.
"Absolutely."
Caleb spoke up. "I must tell you, though. As odd as our last name may be, in spite of an unusual name, events that happen to our family, are anything but. But I'll talk about that later. Let's just focus on our story with each other. A few days, later, I'm in middle school, I'm heading to lunch, and then, Amanda and I have a momentary look at each other as I see that she's leaving the cafeteria. I was surprised. I didn't see her in my school for lots of months. Amanda was also surprised to see me. Apparently, we didn't know we were in the same school. Heck, we didn't even pay attention to each other for so long. I waited for her at the end of school, and to my satisfaction, she came out at some point after me. I learned from her that we didn't see each other because we had different school schedules. That was one thing I previously thought. We talked for a short while, even though my dad's car had came just as she did. Thankfully, he allowed us to talk as he waited for us. After that, we left. In the first few days to come, we interacted with each other, and after those days, something sparked inside of me. In the summer, I continued to spend lots of time with her, we had fun at different places, the arcade, the movie theater, the park, etc. That feeling inside me was growing too. In the middle of July, I started to realize I was in love with her."
"The feeling was mutual." Amanda added in, smiling. "We took up the rest of the summer, trying to muster the courage to admit our feelings of love for each other, while still acting cool with each other. But on the last day of the first week of being back in school, we admitted our feelings. We took it upon ourselves to always support each other. There were times we had problems, but we always managed to keep our relationship afloat. One of the best ways we solved a problem, was after looking at the root of the problem. We've been a couple in middle school for as long as it lasted, getting to know each other ever since after we first met, then through high school, and college, and three months before we graduated college, Caleb proposed to me, I accepted, and we got married afterwards. Our marriage is a stable, but crazy, but ultimately happy one. I've always supported him in his intentions to become a farmer. Throughout the years, he's been studying something else and learning how to start a farm. He's made lots of progress in his part of building up the farm to what it is now. As for me, outside of doing my part as a farmer, I've studied and gotten a job to be a landscaper. If you ever call the company that I work for to do a landscaping job, you can count on me to do a great job at it. I'm one of the best in the company."
"Now, without further ado. Let's go meet the family." Caleb said. The camera followed the couple into the house as they led the cameraman and the interviewer into the living room where there was a family of 9 kids of different appearances and ages.
"Regulars, say hello." Caleb said.
"Hello." The kids said.
"Hello." Replied the cameraman and interviewer.
"These are our kids. Feel free to get to know them, individually." Caleb added.
*Cut to a 18 year old brown haired man, with a pair of rectangular glasses, a short curly wave hairstyle, a chestnut, long sleeve brown shirt with checkered dark red squares, black pants, and brown shoes, sitting down. His name, Antonio Regular appears underneath him.*
"So, what's your personality like? What are your talents?"
"I happen to be a nice guy. I'm a dedicated, motivated, hard worker. At times, I will go help other people in variable situations, and a little bit often, I donate to hospitals, animal shelters, and the Clearwater Marine Aquarium, individually. I am a loving, selfless, sibling. As long as I have a chance, I'm willing to help them with variably anything. I'm quite intelligent in terms of mathematics and veterinary medicine."
"Have you ever argued with any of your siblings?"
"Just a little bit more than a little bit often. But no matter how much we dispute, in the end, we make up with each other, depending on which siblings. I argue with some siblings more than a little bit often, some less often than that, and the rest of my siblings, I mostly don't argue with at all."
"What talents do you have, Antonio?"
"Like I said, I happen to be talented in mathematics and veterinary medicine. I have a love of animals. I even know how to handle quite a number of them. I've already been accepted into a college here. But, with what I'm studying, I want to work as an architect. I've drawn blueprints of things myself. I've also made models. Maybe I could be an architect for enclosures, hallways, structures, and things in zoos, aquariums, and sanctuaries. For some reason, veterinary medicine, doesn't feel like it's something I want to work as, but I sure do put it to good use."
*Cut to a tan haired 17 year old man with light tan spiked hair, well-built arms, a black short sleeve shirt with an explosion in the front, black pants, and brown shoes, sitting down. His name, Kevin Regular appears.*
"So, what's your personality like? What are your talents?" The interviewer asked.
"I happen to be tough, but a lot more nice. I'm daring too. Although, I can rather be impulsive. I've been working on it for years, I'm still impulsive, but I'm mostly a lot less impulsive then I used to be. Like my older brother, and the rest of my family, I'm selfless and willing to help others. Although some of us have a better time at enjoying that type of thing than others. We're still pleasant people, though. For my talents, I happen to be an expert in being a stuntman. That's what I want to be when I grow up. Sometimes, I try to make some new stunts. There are some stunts neither of my parents want me to try out, though, only if there are precautions taken, at least until I'm living an independent life. But regardless, they still support what I want to be. I've been lifting weights to make me stronger. I mean take a look at this." Kevin flexed his right arm, and his muscle pumped up. "That's not the only thing I'm good at. For example, I'm very good at memorizing history. Even though I'm not a big fan of learning history. But it sure has interesting things. I'll tell you an example of history. Did you know that Global officially expanded its operation to the west coast when it leased a portion of the Providencia Ranch in the San Fernando Valley on Aug 15, 1912?"
"No. I did not."
"Well, now you know. And here's another thing. I'm also talented in literature knowledge, I've got a love for literature. Of course, I rather read it as a hobby. I'll have you know that while me and my siblings have our school lives, and personal lives, we all still do our part, helping out in the farm, doing our work, even though we have some hands doing work there. We don't ever slack off. Not even with house chores. Most of us anyway. We will also accept switching chores, after we notify our parents about this. Hard work can make a person reliable and trustworthy. Another thing about me, I'm the champion swimmer of my high school."
"Nice."
*Cut to a 16 year old woman. She looked like her dad, but with a woman's face and build, she had long, dark brown hair, touching her shoulders, she was also wearing a Navy blue beanie, a Navy blue long sleeve shirt, light blue pants, purple and white tennis shoes, and she was wearing rectangular glasses. Her name, Esther Regular appears.*
"I am one of the nicest siblings. Previously, I took a job to walk people's dogs for a few weeks, and then 5 months of babysitting. It was not easy trying to convince my parents for me to take those 2 jobs. I donated clothes at times. I even gave 2 sweaters I no longer needed to a homeless woman out on the streets in the city, and her grandson. I came back later to give them food. I can be gullible, when it comes to trying to get a boyfriend, though. I've been through more than one of those. I've slowly been becoming more aware of which boy to be careful of. Mostly. I'm only a third gullible, especially when it comes to the Internet. When Mom was busy with landscaping, I took her place to help Dad and two of my brothers with gathering up the corn we brought up, even though at the same time, I wanted to listen in to a phone contest, and wanted to win. But, my heart guided me to do the right thing. I'm partly optimistic, and I generally see the good in lots of people. But a little bit often, I'm gullible when it comes to that too. My talents are singing, dancing, cooking, baking, and being a musician. I can play the violin, the banjo, the piano, the acoustic guitar, the saxophone, the trumpet, and the flute. I also happen to be a fan of classical music. I love it. I want to make a positive difference in the world, I want to help people in different situations. Like the children in Africa. Famine ravages variable locations. I want to be seen as a good person in the eyes of God, flawed as I am. Not only all of that, but I'm obsessed with speaking in different languages. They fascinate me. I've learned how to speak many different languages when I was 4 years old. And the number of languages I learned to speak has grown over the years. It's a great gift, I would say. Even if a few of my siblings can get annoyed by me not speaking English, and my Dad is very insistent on me speaking English when I speak about something several times in another language. I'm going to say a few things in different languages. El sol es brillante. That means the sun is bright in Spanish. La Terre est pleine de vie. That means the Earth is filled with life in French. Yǒu hěnduō bùtóng de shíwù. That means there are lots of different foods in Chinese. Tha na cuantan domhainn. That means the oceans are deep in Scots Gaelic. Diere kom in verskillende vorms en groottes voor. That means animals come in different sizes in Afrikaans. What did you think?"
"Wow. That was amazing." The interviewer answered, calmly but surprised.
"Thank you. Sometimes, I work at a soup kitchen too. Now, concerning my gift in speaking lots of languages, maybe I could work as a translator, for people coming over to another country. Who knows what I could end up working as? I hope it'll be a good job. Or I could work as a teacher for one of those languages. Also, I've been practicing speaking in lots of different accents."
*Cut to a 14 year old boy. He had brown hair in a crew cut hairstyle, he was wearing an orange short sleeve shirt with tiger stripes, brown shorts, and black and white shoes. His name, Skyler Regular appears."
"I can be nice, but stubborn, and I can sometimes, be a little bit arrogant when it comes to my success. But at times I can be frustrated, when it comes to being asked for help with one of the laptops or the TV too many times. I just wish that some of my family members would put in the effort to learn how to do it themselves. But 2 years ago, they've been learning much, concerning that, now I'm just asked a little bit often, so that's something."
"Got it."
"My talent happens to be related to computer-related work. I'm great at designing websites. I've made my own website, and I helped a few people with making webites of their own. I even helped out someone who was running a business, helping out homeless people out with the website. Check out the home page of my website, it's called Skyler's Super Awesome World." Skyler raised an iPad he has, showing the home page for his website. It had quite a great design. As he scrolled down slowly, there were different details on it: A few different colors mixed with each other, there were fireworks, dinosaurs, an electric guitar, a set of drums, 2 bald eagles, 2 golden eagles, and baleen whales and orcas.
"Whooooa. Cool."
"Thank you, thank you. I also happen to know what wires to put on the TV's, it's nothing very complex though. But I know how to do it. I've also learned which wires, plugs and cords are compatible and meant to be placed in which models. I could work as a website designer, as long as I get paid a lot a year. You see, I have some talents, but I want to get paid a salary that is a lot more than an average amount. But my parents constantly warn me not to be so obsessed with money. Two thirds of the time, I take it to heart. I must not be so drunk with how much money I have. They have helped me be humble, and I am willing to give it to homeless people, and non-homeless people regardless, even in loans. Most of the time, I'm patient if someone takes too long to pay me back. But if you ever see me be very impatient, it's not a pretty sight. At first, I had to look for an outlet to take it out on. Thankfully, listening to soothing music and doing push-ups helped me calm down, years ago when it happened, and they still do. Trust me, I can be frustrating when I'm very impatient. On a different note, sometimes, I'm always wanting attention and recognition from my family, and from the public."
*Cut to a 14 year old South Korean-American girl, wearing an almost dark pink short sleeve shirt, with orange polka dots and blue zebra stripes, white shorts, and dark grey and white shoes. Her name, Savannah Regular, appears.*
"You're probably wondering what a South Korean girl like me is doing, living with a family of White American people. Here's the thing: I was basically adopted. I was in an orphanage for years. I ended up being glossed over for 7 years. But years ago, whenever that was, I can't remember, the Regulars came to visit where I was living. They were feeling like adopting at the time, and at that time, I was 11 years old. They saw me, they were given some information about me, they became interested in me, we had a momentary bonding moment, then after 4 days, they adopted me, and I was now a part of their lives. I was told that Mom and Dad were discussing amongst themselves, they thought I deserve a home, and they thought, they thought I was interesting and appealing, nice, sweet, and they also thought it'd be interesting to have a child of a different race in their family. Regardless whether or not you think that that last part is selfish, they adopted me out of love and the kindness of their hearts. I was treated equally as a loved member of the family, all of my older and younger siblings accepted me as family. Now some people whisper or talk about us behind our backs, but my parents don't let it get to us or them, especially me. That went on for 3 months, before that had ended, now everyone's okay with it. The same thing happened to me when I was in one of my school grades. If you should know, my brother Skyler was born 2 months before me. If you ask me about my birth parents, let's just say that they were jewel thieves, who were arrested, and they weren't even well-intentioned jewel thieves, I was taken to the orphanage when I was a baby, I don't know where they were sent, but that didn't matter to me. In fact, I don't dwell on that matter. No matter how long it's been, my parents that I live with have respected my choice on whether or not to ever look for them or visit them. I'm a person who lives in the present. Painful or difficult as it may be at times."
"Interesting. All of that's quite interesting. What are your talents?"
"I got a thing for gardening. I could work at my parent's farm (if I could), or at a community garden, or anywhere that involves me working as a botanist. I'm also great at organizing. I'm a third above being average when it comes to placing decorations for birthday parties. But sometimes, in life, I can be impulsive. And I can be impulsive when it comes to lighting fireworks, a little bit often. There were 10 times that I wasn't being careful with fireworks that weren't illegal. At least I didn't get physically scarred or get disfigured or lose a body part. Fireworks aren't operated by adults for nothing indeed. And I was impulsive in one time thinking I could try to protect one of my younger sisters from a rattlesnake. I thought I could kick it away, but I got bit in the leg for my trouble. That sure was a near-death experience I was saved from."
*Cut to a 13 year old boy with short, light tan curly hair, a dark green long sleeve shirt, with thin orange red horizontal stripes, white pants, and white tennis shoes. His name, Rico Regular, appears. He had his hands locked with each other, and was grinning.*
"Hiya. This is exciting. I look a little bit excited on the outside, but on the inside, I am a lot more excited for this. I was very excited when Dad told us about this. He and everyone else helped me to become very calm about this. A documentary wasn't what I was expecting, but it's a start. And I don't even need a script. Speaking of movies, let me tell you, I want to become an actor for movies and television. I did my part in a Christmas play when I was 5, I've been practicing. It took weeks, but I managed to get better at it, before the play would premiere. I've also been learning on acting with some friends of mine at elementary school, and middle school. I've been getting better and better as the years went on. Acting is my talent. But a few months ago, I've been thinking of, and choosing to also become a director, and a screenwriter. However, it's difficult for me. I'm not very good at writing engaging stories. There are a few occasions where I made some engaging, stories. But I got to work hard. My family has been always supportive of me, they've helped me become humble if I want to become an actor, a director, and a screenwriter. When the time comes for me to learn them, I've got a long way to go. My family also helped me on how to handle criticisms, no matter how brutally honest or calm as they are. I want to entertain people on screen, mainly for action. Good thing I have Kevin to help me with that. But he's a lot more of a daring stuntman than me. But, I actually call him a crazy stuntman. I must do my best, and play to my strengths, and I must be confident enough. But somtimes, I go overboard with my acting. I hope that the movie community recognizes me as one of the greatest actors to live, and I hope I can achieve becoming at least great, if not one of the greatest actors indeed. And I cannot do anything that would or could end my acting career in the future. And one of the biggest problems for me is fitting in amongst the actors, given my religion."
*Cut to an 11 year old boy with dark tan hair in an Ivy League hairstyle, wearing rectangular shaped glasses, a dark red shirt with blue silhouettes of dinosaurs on them, brown shorts, and red and white sneakers. His name, Milo Regular, appears.*
"Nice to meet you. My family is nice in their own rights, depending on the person. Me, I'm generally nice, but I'm one of the big troublemakers. But only half often. I happen to cause pranks half of the time on my family, they're nothing too severe. I get it from Dad. He pranked college students a little bit often when classes were over, and after he graduated college. He's a serious man now. Now, there were many times I pranked strangers or anyone else, especially bullies, out in public, most of the time they didn't know it was me. For those, individuals who found out it was me, I had to run for it. Not once could they get their hands on me, their reactions were rather disproportionate to my pranks. My pranking, I do it all in good fun, unless someone happens to be a bully or disrespectful to me or any of my family members (in fact, I may be nice, but I get in fights at school at times). Outside of that, I am mischievous, but I'm also rebellious. Apparently, I get almost the most groundings. In fact, my parents and siblings can't tolerate if I watch anything rated PG-13 or higher, or even teenager cartoons, without anyone older than me, right by me to watch it, and keep my eyes from anything inappropriate. Did you know that I got chased around the farm by Dad, just for watching Regular Show on DVD, we own packages for the complete first, second, and third seasons. You should've seen it. It's rather funny when you do. In general, it is funny when I get chased around. Antonio blocked me from escaping and I got grounded for watching that show (specifically, it's a cartoon for teenagers). I also got chased, caught, and grounded, for watching the DVD of Dudes in Blue, another time. But I'm fine with that. Sure, you may find it questionable, but I'm okay with it. My parents call me a tough nut to crack when it comes to that situation. But my heart is ultimately in the right place. My entire family knows that. For all of my faults, they love me indeed, and vice versa. Now, about my talents, I happen to be an expert in paleontology. Dinosaurs were one of the best things I was introduced to in my life, I first saw dinosaur fossils in a museum when I was three years old. It was overwhelming for me. And I got introduced to them more in books, movies, and documentaries. I took it upon myself to learn prehistory, and be even more of an expert. I want to be a paleontologist when I grow up. The problem is, heh, I'm lazy in general. I'm a fun lover. I'd rather just sit down, play video games, watch TV, use a screen device, etc. That doesn't stop me from buying books. Of course, me reading prehistory books, that's one of the only things I have motivation for, I've been determined to memorize this knowledge. I'm only motivated to read prehistory books, and homework, so I don't get in trouble for not finishing it, same with school projects. Speaking of prehistory, there were lots of times that I have been digging for fossils buried under the ground, in the farm. I always ended up fruitless, and my two older brothers, the work hands, and my dad would always get mad at me and on my case for leaving so much heaps of dirt, and for not doing my chores, homework, or whatever. Ha, ha. Those are among the difficult times in my life. But over the first few years in my life, I've stopped digging for fossils, and I've been taking the farm seriously. Another talent I have is, I'm great at inventing in robotics. I get it from my dad. Of course, I'm partly lazy with that too. The best (and only) achievement I made so far, was a robotic set of arms, on a pole, that stands on a pair of treads, and it's made to dig, with a shovel."
*Cue a 9 year old girl, with long, dark brown hair, wearing a Navy Blue beanie, a Navy blue long sleeve shirt, black pants, and blue and white tennis shoes, sitting down. She looked like she was a younger Esther, all differences aside. She had an indifferent face. Her name, Kira Regular appears.*
"Hello. How are you doing?"
"We're doing fine, thank you. It's your turn for an interview. What would you like to tell us about yourself?"
"I'm nice. Of course, I will not take it well if me or anyone in my family is disrespected in any way. I happen to get into a lot more fights at school than my brother, Milo. Dad doesn't consider it too much, but my mom is very insistent on me just not resorting to violence. I don't see things her way, but she means well, I can tell. So I learned those things as well. When I'm assigned a chore, I don't complain. I just deal with it, and do it. That is unless of course I get assigned with picking up poop and taking out the trash. I complain a little bit. At least I don't have to work hard in negotiating. I love absolutely all of my family, for all their faults, even Milo, what with his laziness and his disobedience, he can be a little bit annoying too on rare occasions. In terms of talents, I love rapping, I listen to rap music. It's my favorite music. I've been practicing rapping for years. I've been getting really great at it."
"Interesting."
"Oh, it's more than interesting. I made several friends in my school life. They got to know me, and they enjoy my talent for rapping. I am quite famous at school. Ever since 2 months ago, I've been using rapping as an alternative to fighting, against bullies. Now I've gotten in half less fights than before. I hope I can make a more than good living with singing rap music. Not only do I rap, but I can also beatbox. I'm great at that too. My friends enjoy my talent for that too. I've learned how to fight from Kevin. He even learned martial arts. I learned that too. I'm not a push-over. I refuse to be walked over. And applicably anyone in school who gets on my bad side, will regret it.
Another talent, I have is training animals. When I was 4, I thought of training animals, and it started out difficult. But I kept my motivation. This is something I love. I put in hard work, no matter how difficult it got, through some different animals, and different tricks. I got better and better at it, until I got great at it. If only I could put it to good use, but I remember that I must only do it for fun, not for money. Still, it would be something. I really want to show people how great I am as an animal trainer." She said in disappointment, showing an upset face. "My other potential talent is, probably one of the least greatest, compared to everyone else's, when you bring up Esther's talent for speaking lots of languages, in my opinion. No disrespect to her, though. But then again, Esther's talent of speaking lots of languages can actually be useful, if we're going to another country, and it would save us from hiring a translator who wants to be paid. I don't know for sure if I'll become a famous rapper and beatboxers. What if I end up getting outshined by other people of those professions?"
"Ah, don't be too sure about that. Surely, you'll probably still be famous among those."
"Thanks, anyway. However, the job I really want to work is animal-related. Not with domestic animals, though. I want to work with wild animals, like, either elephants or marine animals, like dolphins or orcas for example. I love animals. Even moreso than Antonio. Too bad it can be difficult for me to go green. That's not something I'm proud of. I could work as a wildlife veterinarian or a ranger, I feel like wanting to work in Africa, with elephants. It's one of the best places you can see wildlife. Speaking of animals, my favorite animals happen to be ferrets. They are such cute looking mammals, they look so cuddly, and playful. Of course, in this state, ferrets are prohibited for ownership. That's something I don't like about California. *Sigh* I wish I could have a ferret for a pet. I've been wishing for one for most of my birthdays, and most Christmases. But I don't let that distract me from the lives I have. I just keep treading on. My family understands my concerns with a ferret though. Like everyone else, I support my family on the good things, regardless of anything, I love all of them, I want to do right by them. Anyway, I'll just settle with becoming a rapper. I'm okay with that."
*Cut to a 5 year old girl, with brown, short curly hair, wearing a yellow short sleeve shirt with a brown-throated sloth's face on it, blue shorts, and brown shoes, sitting down. Her name, Regina Regular appears.*
"Hiya." She said, waving her hand. "I haven't been filmed for a documentary before."
"Just be calm. You'll do fine. How is your life?"
"It's fine and dandy. Partly. But I live a happy life. My favorite animals are sloths. Sometimes, Mom calls me 'little sloth' becaus I hang with my arms around her, or Dad, like a baby sloth, I do that with some of my siblings, too. I am kind. I am humble. I am obedient. I make my bed. I do my chores. I do my homework. I can be fooled sometimes. I love my family. All of them. I want to make friends. I want to play with people. My talent is knowledge about outer space."
"Space?"
Regina nodded her head. "Knowledge about space. I've been watching videos related to space. And I've been reading books about space. Sometimes, I've been stargazing with Mom and/or Dad. It's so beautiful at night. I've read about the moon landing too. I want to be an astronaut when I grow up. I want to be in the world beyond Earth. I didn't know that the sun was a star at first. And I want to see the stars that surround this planet. I want to see other planets too. Mom and Dad tell me not to be too expectant on becoming an astronaut, but they support me regardless. Space is so awesome. So beautiful. And it feels so mysterious. Sometimes, I play space games with some of my siblings. I hope I get to ride on a space shuttle when I grow up."
"Dream on, kid."
*Cut to Caleb and Amanda Regular*
"Well, you've met our family. What do you think?" Said Caleb.
"They all have interesting details. So do you two. One of your sons said he got his talent of inventing in robotics from you, Caleb. What do you say to that?"
"I can confirm that. I do have the talent for inventing robots. I went to college to learn how to make them. I even got a job at a robotics company. I worked my way up, I was recognized as one of the best, and I've gotten quite a high pay as an inventor. A lot moreso than my wife." He said, teasingly.
"Oh, Caleb." Amanda replied.
"Hey, pardon me, but you look like someone named J.G. Quintel, Mr. Regular. You even talk exactly like him, too. How would you respond to that?"
"Oh, heh, ha,ha,ha,ha. Now, I've been hearing that a lot for several years of my life. People at first would think that I am a look-alike and a sound-alike of the creator of Regular Show and Close Enough. But here's the thing. I was born before him, so really, he's a look-alike and sound-alike, of me."
"I didn't know who J.G. Quintel was when I first met Caleb." Amanda replied.
"So, Mr and Mrs. Regular. What are your personalities like?"
"Let my wife go first. It's your cue, Amanda."
"Okay. Here's what I'm like. I'm a nice woman, I'm selfless, humble, insistent, a little bit often, I can be stubborn, I'm self-assertive (although I make sure I don't get myself into an unwanted situation), I'm supportive, loving, at times stern, but fair, and I'm protective too. I also don't resort to violence in a situation, especially a quarrel."
"What about you, Mr. Regular? What are you like?"
"I can be nearly a medium more stubborn, but I'm also nice, laid-back (most of the time), loving, kind, humble, confident, hard-working, determined, and I'm also self-assertive. I absolutely let no one walk over me. I've been self-assertive ever since I've been in elementary school to college. And it's not very easy to impress me if you're not family, friends, or relatives. I can be angered or annoyed at times. Now, even though our kids go to schools in a city, we want them to live here. It can kind of help them to not be badly influenced. We want them to be righteous."
"We want all of our kids to become pleasant, heartful, caring people. Many of them have big hearts in their own right. They are people we are proud to call our children."
Amanda said as she put one of her arms on Caleb's chest, and her other arm around him.
"Absolutely all of them." Caleb said, putting his arm around her, too. "Now, remember when I said our lives are anything but regular? Well, through the years of our family, several instances show some sort of crazy events going on. Like for example, there were 9 times we got caught in the path of a police chase, as police were chasing thieves, murderers, or variable other criminals in cars, there was a time when Esther was threatened into helping a thief rustle livestock from our farm and other farms, there was also a time when Kira, Milo, and Antonio were being chased and attacked by sparrows, after Milo accidentally knocked a nest over, there was even the time that Milo suddenly got launched out of the raft in the ride, Cretaceous Park: The Ride, during a family trip to Global Studios Hollywood, one month before it would close for refurbishment, and he was dangling and trying to hold onto the mouth of an animatronic Allosaurus, the ride had to be shut down afterwards until he was rescued. And don't get me started on the time that me and the first 3 older boys were defending ourselves against a horde of zombies, while everyone else locked themselves inside the house and barricaded the windows."
"Wow. That's crazy."
"I know, right? Specifically, only half of our life is that crazy. Now, when it comes to our last name. For the first few years of our family life (and Amanda's life before she met me), and the first years of our later children, we've been the butt of the joke with our last name, if a certain midnight ride is of any example, Milo, Kira, and Savannah initially couldn't walk through a school hall without hearing "The Regulars are coming! The Regulars are coming! The Regulars are coming!" It's been dying down over time, so we only hear it a few times until it finally ended for sure.
*Cut to Lisa Loud, sitting on a chair in her room. Her name appears.*
"Am I correct in asking that you're really the smartest child in your family?" Asked the interviewer.
"You speak correctly. Of course, I can be problematic on my own. I've been using my siblings as experiments at times, but now that has come to an end. I didn't respect my siblings when it counted, and that's just one way how I didn't." Lisa said.
"How useful are you to your family, what with your topping amount of intelligence?"
"Very useful. I can be used for metric meters or for train schedules. Those are two ways I can be useful. I can also tell exactly the best place on where to make cookies. It sure came in good use when Lincoln and Clyde were selling cookies of their own. And let me tell you. They are quite delicious. You should try them. But then again, it would take a long time for Lincoln to make cookies, and I don't think he'd be in the mood."
"Lisa, how close are you with your only brother?"
"Mmm, not very close. In fact, I have ganged up on him when it counted. Not a good thing, especially when you're a little sister. Not to mention, I initially stole one of several superhero characters he and Clyde created. Even though we all got to be exactly together as it should be, with my other sisters, we all still paid dearly, in the form of lots of people being angry at us and expressing it at a box office bombing at the theater. Speaking of which, another time me and everyone else acted less than kind to Lincoln was when we made fun of him one time for portraying his respected superhero, Ace Savvy, when he was originally going to go to a convention. It was very uncalled for. Very disrespectful."
"Um, okay. What's your personality like?"
"I can be indifferent, and not very emotional. But I discovered at a point, that I do care about my family being around me. I do have emotions. I also did feel guilty when Lincoln helped us all get money, and he could not get any himself. I also wanted my grandfather, Pop-Pop to live longer so I could see him. But the ways I tried didn't appeal positively to him. I'll just as well, enjoy him while he still lives. In terms of my talents, I'm obviously a genius, I've made inventions of my own, but I'm prone to causing chemical explosions when it comes to chemicals. Not to mention, I haven't been very well regarding for everyone who lives in this household, and now my own actions with chemicals and stuff have come to an end. Speaking of my talent, I am currently working on making a cure to relieve Lincoln of an unexpected power he obtained (by accident, of course). I've been given permission for that. At least, I'll mostly do my part in it, if not entirely all of it. Now, don't tell him this, I want to tell him personally myself. I am also doing this as a way to earn his forgiveness. I don't want him to be suffering whatever he could be from this shapeshifting power. I've previously been informed that when he woke up, he was curled up on his bed, without a cover, he yawned like a big cat, and I learned that he didn't wash his hands at first, but he was struggling to wash his hands when did shortly afterwards, he was showing a face of displeasure, and I saw for myself at breakfast that he was picking up parts of food, using his tongue, and I also saw him drinking water, with his tongue. Those are all characteristics of a cat (not counting cats like tigers in terms of washing his hands). I've taken down notes of everything he's done. In terms of him yawning like a big cat, I realized that the chemicals he accidentally drank, after falling into a vat of it, affected his vocal cords. Also, the first time, I've seen him use his power, I learned that he can also regenerate his body from external and internal injuries & wounds. He was initially impaled with a sword in his big cat form, it was a Smilodon populator, but when he changed back to normal, he was entirely healthy again later on. A hospital appointment sure showed that. It's extraordinary. However, I'm not sure if his regeneration can also save him from internal bleeding or interal hemorrhages. Also, he told me that he changed into a Smilodon, because he was at a high level of being angry."
Little did Lisa know, that Lincoln was overhearing her, until he stopped after he heard about the part where she said that she was going to make this cure, so she could earn her forgiveness, and a few statements after that. Those statements surprised him. He thought to himself as he walked away.
"Uh, so Lisa. How much of a big deal are you in the science community?" The interviewer asked.
"Oh, I'm respected in there, quite respected. I'll tell you that. Of course, I'm still a little girl. I got to be more considerate. I got to make ethical decisions. I am able to make robots, among the things I can do with my scientific knowledge. I can even make a type of material that can dissolve snow. I even made lie detecting cameras once. I can rap too."
"You rap? A girl like you, can rap?"
"Definitely. You should see me rap. I'll do it right now." Lisa made a short rap, and the interviewer and cameraman were impressed.
"Wow. Impressive."
"That ought to have subverted whatever expection you had of me."
*Cut to Luna Loud, in her bedroom, sitting on her bed. Her name appears*
"Tell us about yourself, Luna. How's life like for you?"
"It's been a crazy one. When you have 'loud' for a last name. I've made my music pretty loud, Lori can yell loudly if she's angry, Lisa made chemical experiments which lead to explosions, those types of examples. But other than that, my life is good, much."
"Do you have a great life as a musician?"
"You can count on it. I'm famous, I'm part of a band, I'm respected amongst my fellow band members. I'm sure I'll become famous after I graduate college, dude."
"How close are you to your family as a whole?"
"Eh, it depends. I am close to Lincoln (up until he disowned me as a sister, but I can't say I blame him), and I am pretty close to Dad, for example. I was one of the nicer sisters, but I'm not perfect. Me and my sisters have this hive-minded mentality apparently, but it took a long time for us to get a major wake-up call. One example of me not being nice to my bro, is when I blew him out of my room with my speakers, when we were fighting, searching for hidden money. It was a severe time. You should've seen it."
"I can imagine."
"The truth about our family is rather sad. We're dysfunctional, we have variable flaws, my brother can get the short end of the stick lots of times (lots of times he's had to take responsibility for his mistakes, while we'd get off scot-free), I can turn against him at times, and we don't know a lot about each other. It's that serious."
"Oh man. That's just-wow."
"You can say that again."
*Cut to Leni and Lori in their room, sitting on Leni's bed. Their names appear*
"Tell us all about how daily life is for the two of you. Lori, you go first."
"Mhm. I can be a person who's on her phone, lots of times. It was noisy for a long time, before Mom and Dad made the changes. Lots of times, the house would be filled with activity. Lisa's science works, Luna's rock and roll music, Lynn's sports antics, Luan's comedy, Lily would be farting at times, Lana would be doing things with her animals, Lola would driver her car inside the house at times. Lucy and Lincoln were less as active when it came to activity. Lincoln would prefer to play video games, or read Ace Savvy comics. It's something boys do. It's something boys do that they can enjoy. When it comes to the TV, it's safe to say that a fight will ensue when two or more of us will disagree on who should watch what, depending on the situation. Otherwise, we're all on board with each other when it comes to watching Dream Boat. Back when he had our old van (before it got destroyed, please don't ask), I used to have my siblings do favors for me, if they wanted me to drive them somewhere. Next subject, me and my family can get annoyed when Luan tells a joke that comes off as annoying, and it always does. My life is good, until the changes came, in terms of things that count. I have several friends. They are supportive of me. I have been bossy to my siblings in general, but it's been decreasing. Whenever Mom and Dad go for a night out, they leave me in charge, and I've been doing a good job keeping the house in one piece (most of the time)."
"In one piece? That doesn't make sense." Said Leni. Before Lori could clarify, the interviewer spoke up.
"Leni, can we hear about you next?"
"Absolutely?" She said.
"Good."
"I am nice, I'm the nicest out of all the siblings here. But I'm not always nice. I made fun of Lincoln when he was portraying a superhero named Ace Savvy, for example."
"I see."
I'm really good at making clothes. Like, I even once made a curtain into a holiday themed clothing."
"Interesting."
"I can always count on Lincoln, to test out clothing that I make. He's such a reliable person. He's not as nice as me, but he is nice. I see it for myself. We are close to each other. But I didn't always treat him nicely. I feel guilty, and I feel sorry for him. I think he's suffered more times than any of us. And as if life wouldn't give it a rest, he behaves like a cat."
"Uh huh."
"I have a good number of friends. I have a good job at the mall, at Ms. Carmichael's shop, if you ever shop there, I can take a look at what clothing is the right one for you. Trust me, you should watch me, for a test. I'm also very great at organizing for a birthday party. I can be the dumbest of the siblings, but I have some intelligence, hence, I have my talent for making clothes, what clothing to recommend, and organizing and decorating for a birthday party. My siblings tried to get a birthday party ready without me for someone, but it didn't go right for them. Also, I've failed my driving test lots of times. At least, most of my siblings put in the effort to help me get better at it. I hope Lincoln can forgive me for all that I've done against him. If not, I'll just have to move on, difficult as it may be."
*Cut to Rita and the twins in their room sitting on Lana's bed (Lola is no longer wearing gloves). Lola's name appears*
"So, you're Lola Loud. The girl who used to dress like a princess."
"That is correct. Now I'm wearing casual clothing. It was one of the changes my parents made."
"Mhm. Tell me about yourself."
"In retrospect, I'm one of the problem children. I threaten people, I resort to violence and blackmailing others, I'm no stranger to threatening and disrespecting Lincoln, who's done so many things for me and my family, I can get angry too. I don't like getting my hands dirty, I used to be an attendant in beauty pageants, I was so arrogant about my beauty, I was a rotten person. I took my brother for granted for too long, and look how that ended up. I was one of the best pageants, I won many trophies in those pageants. On a side note, I end up fighting Lana at times over something, depending, but there are times where I can get along with her too. I can be a problem to my other siblings too when it counts. I was a brat. Now you may not believe this, but I didn't know how to read for years. That was until Lincoln found out for himself, and taught me. Not Lori, not Luan, not even Lisa. It was Lincoln himself. That is selfless of him. I just continue to act mean afterwards in general. I did make a friend at a later point with someone named Meli Ramos. She's a nice girl, compared to me. I have a thing about me looking ugly. I got a thing for chocolate (same for my sisters), I wasn't above violence when it comes to finding money and everyone else in the family wants it too. I don't like Lana doing gross things, and I don't like her reptiles being on my bed (before they and her other animals were removed from the house), I don't appreciate if she gets something gross or dirty on me. I especially don't like her eating trash."
"Oooooookay. Lana, let's move on to you."
"I was one of the closer sisters to Lincoln. And yes, I have eaten trash, but Mom and Dad have taken it upon themselves to end it, along with every dirty thing that I do. Now, when it comes to Lincoln and I, we love the roller coaster called the Milk Shaker at the theme park, Dairy Land. He can help me with my animals, we bond over video games (it took me a long time to play one), he may not like my disgusting habits, but he tolerates them, he taught me how to act like Lola, we worked together to protect frogs, we can bond over animal related things, he can play with me when it counts. On the next topic, I have friends, I'm nice, I'm really good at plumbing, making go-carts, working on vehicles, I'm even experienced with animal knowledge. I love animals. At least, that's what I thought, except when it came to going green."
"Got it."
"Dad can find me reliable when it came to plumbing and fixing the van, before it was destroyed. Now we have a new one."
"Yes, we could see the new one in the driveway when we were coming."
"Me and Lola don't always get along with our siblings all of the time, but we can still be at peace with each other a number of times. Another thing, I have a role model in the form of Bobbie Fletcher. Another thing about me, I'm great at wrestling alligators."
"My children all have great talents of their own. I want them to succeed in life, and absolutely support each other, no matter their talents or what they enjoy. Not counting the trash thing. And me and my husband will make sure that we get to know a lot about each other. I'll ask for help from my dad too, and maybe the family of a friend of my son's." Said Rita.
*Cut to Luan in her bedroom. Her name appears*
"How enjoyable are you around the public here, Luan?"
"I happen to be a great babysitter, and I happen to be a loved birthday party entertainer, as a comedian. I have a boyfriend, I'm in the acting group, I can cook as well, I've learned it from my dad. From what I heard a previous time ago, he gave advice for Lincoln and Clyde when they were making and selling cookies. That's so sweet for them. I hope they can become great bakers. I'm a nice girl, but when I was always jokes, my family wouldn't laugh, lots of times. But I do it anyway. Speaking of something I said previously, I own a business that families can contact me to perform for their kids of any age, for humor. After some failed recruits, Lincoln was a great assistant, although he had to learn the hard way that not everyone can laugh at just one type of humor at an emo's party. I was also a problem child when it came to April Fools Day, though, before that came to an end. Let's just say I would set up extreme pranks, such as getting the house literally wrapped in wrapping paper."
"Okay." The interviewer said, feeling weirded out.
"Outside of that type of thing, I can be nothing more than annoying when I'm always doing comedy. Leni's an easy target when it comes to pranking her with a fake spider. I once had some good time with Lucy during a time when I wanted to first be on stage at the Royal Woods Theatre. That was some good bonding between us, even though I got jealous of her at firs, when she got the chance to have that instead. If only I could have had a more positive relationship with Lincoln forever."
"You and your family really are upset with Lincoln disowning you, huh?"
"We're saddened, actually." Luan sniffled. "But I doubt we did enough right by him. We made fun of him, ganged up on him, disrespected his privacy, and stuff. I want to make it up to him. I want to show him I can change. Uh, I don't want to talk about this. Anyway, I was willing to support Lori when it came to keeping her relationship with her boyfriend, Bobby Santiago, afloat. Of course, he broke up with her anyway. Let's just say we were giving Lincoln's math tutor a hard time, even Lori and Dad. Eh, we got smitten with him. It's unpleasant when you hear more details about it. For all Lincoln's faults, I do think he's funny. I sure do. I told him so himself when he first met a girl he wanted to be friends with. My friends enjoy me in school. I can be serious at times, though, especially after I make a joke about variable things. I'm even an enjoyable comedian to the old people in my grandpa's retirement home. I'm close to my dad."
*Cut to Lynn Jr. and Lucy. Lucy's name appears.*
"Tell us about yourselves. Lucy, you go first."
"I'm an unusual girl, an emo. Although, I tend to scare people so suddenly when I come up from either behind them or next to them. I can do my job at doing speeches for funerals, and I'm talented at poetry. I tend to look to Lincoln for help when I hit a writer's block. I'm one of the sisters who's close to him. We share the status of not quite fitting in with our families. Compared to him though, I'm depressed, most of the time. I didn't take him seriously enough, though, if anyone told you about ganging up on him and his privacy being disrespected."
"Uh huh."
"We used to have a bat living in our room, but Mom and Dad forced the bat out. At least it appeals to Lynn here. Uh, I have a boyfriend. Rocky Spokes. He's the younger brother of one of Lincoln's friends, Rusty. We have a decent relationship. He sees something in me that the other boys didn't. Other boys, in terms of not dressing up like an emo or a goth. I'm part of the Mortician's club. I have friends there. Although, I don't think I deserve friends, given the fact, how I-didn't take Lincoln seriously enough."
"Oh, Lucy, don't deprecate yourself that badly. At least you have some things to enjoy. We all still do." Lynn added. Lucy merely gave a thumb's up.
"Another thing, about me, I used to be doing magic rituals, like summoning spirits, casting spells, I'd even do fortune telling." The interviewer and cameraman became uncomfortable from hearing that.
"Okay. Onto you, Lynn. What things do we not know about you?" The interviewer asked.
"I'm in lots of sports teams in my school. I can get crazy at times. I didn't turn out to be a good babysitter for most families. I bonded with my neighbor Mr. Grouse, over a football game, the fact that he and I were fans of the same football team was new. I'm helpful when it counts, though, especially to Lincoln. I can do push-ups, I can punch a punching bag, I can modify a bike into another bike. I tried to have a boy with me when my friends had signifcant others of their own, so I could fit in, but it didn't work out, but at least we ended things on good terms. At first, I cared about winning the game with my team, but I learned to put that aside, and I also learned to just support my teammates when they get the spotlight for themselves."
"Okay."
"There was one time when Lucy and I couldn't stand being in the same room with each other, so I moved over to Lincoln's room. And, I rather gave him a hard time. He couldn't sleep. After that tribulation, he made it so that Lucy and I could reconcile with each other, so that scandal was over with. Maybe, just maybe, Lincoln will forgive me for how I've wronged him in general. I do want to be a better sister. I want to do right by him."
Meanwhile, Lincoln had two large boxes stacked in his room. He was putting the last Ace Savvy comic inside the box on top. His room's wall no longer had the Ace Savy poster at all. And lying on his bed, was a medium stack of prehistory books. He opened his door, and groaned as he pushed the boxes out. He pushed the boxes across the hallway, grunting along the way as he went. He would stop in the process halfway across the hallway. Leni came out, and saw him, as he continued to push once again, until he stopped under the attic door. He climbed the boxes and pulled down on the attic door handle. But the ladder wouldn't come down all of the way, because it was being blocked the boxes. Lincoln groaned angrily. He jumped off, pushed the boxes back some more inches, climbed them again, jumped off, grabbed the attic door handle, and then the attic ladder fully came down, He didn't notice Leni was watching him, until after he looked to the right side of the box. He looked at her in indifference, grabbed the top box, and struggled to hold it, while holding onto the ladder at the same time. Unfortunately for him, he lost his grip on the box as he was slowly going up the ladder, and the box fell to the floor and Ace Savvy comic books and action figures poured out. Leni was surprised, then became saddened. She figured out what was going on here. Lincoln however, roared like a big cat at the mess that ensued, in anger. He covered his mouth in surprise, and saw that Leni backed up a little bit, in fear. He felt sympathetic to her, but once again became indifferent as he took it upon himself to refill the box. It took a few minutes for him to refill the box. He walked towards the ladder.
"Linky, do you want help?"
"No." He said, out of indifference. He strained, and groaned, once again, trying to hold on to the box, while holding onto the ladder. The box was too big for him though. The box was slipping from his grasp, he tried to hold on it, but just as it started to fall again, Leni caught it, looking at him sympathetically. Lincoln was one third surprised.
He sighed. "All right, you can help me out."
Wihtout another word, Lincoln turned around and held one side of the box, Leni held the other, and they walked up into the attic, they put the box somehwere inside, got out, grabbed the other box, and put it in the attic. After that, Lincoln said "Thanks for your help" to the blonde. His tone in saying it was two fourths indifferent, one fourth calm, and one fourth grateful. And with that, he walked away. Leni watched in sadness as he walked into his room and closed the door.
*Cut to Lincoln, sitting between his bed and his drawers. He had an indifferent look.*
"I'd rather not talk about myself for a portion, all right. But my family, for a long time, they've been a real piece of work, especially Lori, Lola, and Lynn. If I'm in Lori and Leni's room, even by accident, at times that count, Lori will threaten me to get out."
"And how does she threaten you?"
"She threatens to turn me into a human pretzel."
"I haven't ever heard of that, but that sounds painful."
"Me not being in her room comes with my privacy being invaded, but not the girl's. What is it with that? When it comes to Lola, obviously, she'll use violence, threats, and blackmailing to get her way. Lynn, she used to be superstitious and so obsessed with sports before that decreased. I live in a noisy household, a toxic one. I'm not a saint though, for the record. The girls misbehaved in different ways, but I didn't always make good choices in my life."
"Like what, for example?"
"I went against my word that I'd take them with me on a limousine when I had a deal for that. And I was negatively influenced by a snobby rich man. Can you believe that? I also tried to make Lana act like Lola for a contest, but at least I ended that, and let her be herself. Shortly changing the subject, before her bossiness decreased, Lori would use her status as the older sibling to get her way when it counted. She's the oldest sister, I'm the younger brother. Everyone else is the younger sister to her. She would make sure I know that. In the house, I can't make a secret I have stay secret, when it comes to them, when it counts. I used to be a fan of Ace Savvy, but after putting up a fight against cats that wanted to eat me, and ultimately being brought down by a big one, a Maine Coon, I'm no longer that. I'm done subscribing to it. I'm moving on."
*The camera turns over to see the prehistory books on the boy's bed.*
"Are you an expert in prehistory?"
"Uh, no." The camera quickly turned back to him. "But I'm taking it upon myself to learn lots of prehistory facts. I must become an expert in it. Of course, I'm not planning on being a paleontologist or prehistory educator for a lucrative living."
"It's rather a waste of knowledge on prehistory, don't you think?"
Lincoln just looked blankly after being asked that question.
"Well, yeah. I'll still put it to good use, though. In case you should know, I've been keeping the books in plastic containers under my bed, until yesterday afternoon."
"I have to ask you something. Most of your family has healed claw marks and stitched wounds, except for you. Why is that?"
"It's because most of them were attacked and dealt with grievous wounds from the cats in the other universe who wanted to eat us."
"I see. And I remembered something from Lisa, concerning the power you have. Let's just say regeneration is part of it."
"Hmm. Yeah. I'm close to my grandpa, Pop-Pop. His name is Albert. He's the dad of Rita Loud."
"Mhm. Got it."
"I used to be wearing orange polos and blue pants. Now they've been changed to tan shirts and beige pants. I used to think being in a big family had some good things, but now when I live in a family like this, I think it's mostly a curse."
"Mostly a curse? What do you still consider good about it?"
"More numbers of siblings can decrease my chances of getting trouble when it counts. For example, we were all covering for each other when Pop-Pop was calling us. But we got in trouble anyway."
*Cut to Rita Loud in her bedroom.*
"It wasn't easy for him, living with us for a number of years. Dealing with the bad qualities of the girls." Rita began to sniffle, and a tear went down her eye. "And we, we didn't stand by his side at applicable times." Rita looked at her chest. "My chest has been getting swollen, at some point in the past few days." She blew three times. "And I can't seem to get any relief, from these unexpected things going on!" She shouted in anger. "I'm sorry. Mood swings have been one of the things I'm going through. Some other examples of things I've been going through are, increased urination, fatigue, and constipation." She spoke normally, but then began to sob. "And me and my husband have been constantly trying to see a doctor about this. But we keep forgetting about it, we also get occupied with our jobs and home lives." Tears rolled down her as she sobbed. She went through another mood swing. "In 3 minutes, we're going to see a group of religious people, to get ourselves cleansed from dealing with magic and stuff, same with most of the pets. Luan's rabbit too. Aahhhh." Rita wiped her face, calming down.
*Cut to Lincoln Loud.*
"I'm not perfect. I make my own amount of bad choices, the girls make their own amount of bad choices, but it got to me, in 2017, that I've suffered more than my share of misfortunes, given what I've been through. It got to me even more deeply this year. Now, absolutely nobody in my life knew this, and I mean absolutely nobody, but later in March 2017, and after the disastrous Ace Savvy convention in 2019, there were few times that I wished, that I was just a hologram. The disastrous movie premiere only fueled that even more, in spite of the comfort I had received."
Later, the Louds were walking out of the house in a group, in single file, in an orderly procession. Lynn Sr. came to the driveway, in a dark green van, with light green zebra stripes, and hot rod flames. It was quite refreshing when they first got their new van. The Loud patriarch bought it one day before he and his family were sucked into one of the Catscratch universes. Anyway, some of the family members also carried over Cliff, Walt, Charles, and Geo in their own animal carriers. Just as they had loaded up the animals into the back, they turned, and were shocked to see some stray cats watching them.
"AAAAGGH!" Most of them shouted and quickly darted to behind the van. Their combined shouting scared away the cats, and they popped their heads out from behind, watching as they ran away. It was clear that their ordeal with the Hail of Doom clan traumatized all of them. Lily was the most traumatized. Lincoln had to stay in her room to help her fall asleep last night, and he was already uncomfortable with the thought of cats watching them, even though they were now home, but he had to put that aside, half difficult as it was, to help Lily out, until she would finally fall asleep. She gave him a smile which he returned, in her mind, she knew she was safe with him around. Anyway, Lynn Sr. started the van, it warmed up, and once it was fully warmed up, he took off and took his family to the place where they would be cleansed.
Meanwhile, at the Regular family farm
An enormous herd of cattle was running across the field. Five people (wearing cowboy clothing and footwear) on horses were running on different sides of the herd, trying to keep any or catch any members who ran astray. On the left side of the herd running next to them was a male black and white Alaskan husky. One adult ran off, but the dog barked and bit at the hind leg, making her rejoin the herd. The husky stayed next to the herd, while Antonio Regular rode 5 feet behind him on his horse. Him, his dad, and three farm workers rode next to herd on different sides, making sure that the whole herd stayed with each other. Another cow ran off from behind Anthony, and he noticed, he chased after the cow himself. He quickly got his rope, swung the loop around for 3 minutes, aimed, and tossed it, the timing was just right for the lasso to go around the cow's neck, and he pulled back firmly, making the cow struggle to escape, but he made sure to keep the rope in his grasp, bearing his teeth, as he pulled back against the cow, and with that, he kicked on the horse's side, turned it around, and kicked its sides again, making it run, making the cow run too from being pulled by the rope. Everyone else on their horses were still with the herd of cattle, doing the part to keep all members in it. The husky bit another cow's front leg when she tried to run off, making her stay with the herd. Just as three cows were running off from the right side of the herd, a giant animalistic roar made its way through the air. Then, suddenly a large Pachyrhinosaurus emerged, galloping from an uphill climb. It roared at the cows, and one by one, managed to get the cattle back into the herd. Now, in real life, the Pachyrhinosaurus obviously didn't gallop. But this was no ordinary Pachyrhinosaurus. It was a robotic Pachyrhinosaurus. It had foam skin that was painted reddish orange with a dark brown cow spot pattern. And it had two green trapezoids for eyes. Caleb smiled at the sight of the robot helping them out. After all, he made it. By now, there was a cattle stall barn, coming up in their direction, and the robot ran ahead of everyone else. He and all the riders and the husky made sure to slow down the cattle, just as they stopped 3 feet in front of the stall. The riders in the back walked up on their horses to the front of the herd. Caleb looked at everyone. "Good work, everyone. Now let's get these cattle into the stall barn." And with that, everyone worked to get the cattle, into the barn.
*Cut to Caleb in front of the cattle stall barn, as the cattle is being taken inside.*
"Yeah, I can invent robots. But I still resort to doing things by hand, when it comes to the farm, at least, I mostly have manual labor involved here. Now, I've been respected amongst my fellow robot inventors in my workplace. I'm one of the best there. I can invent robots, and I can even make some designs for machines and robots. I've been working for the absolute best robot company in North America. Mt. Preston Robotics. I got my job in the late 1990's. Heh, heh. I started out as a factory worker, assembling robots, but at separate times, I was starting to get recognized for my ability to come up with some designs, so, a lot later in my life, I've been promoted to a designer, but after a few years, I found it too overwhelming, when it came to thinking up designs. But my family was always helping me out to help me get used to it. There are other designers who come up with better design ideas than me, but while I come up with less awesome, but practical designs, at least I still get paid greatly. I got a higher wage than I did as a factory worker. My boss saw potential in me. And I have the option of assembling parts of robots myself too. With that type of thing about me, I was exceptional amongst the other designers of my workplace. Soon, the Pachyrhinosaurus comes up from his right side, and roars, merely for attention, and it worked, as the camera turned over to him. Caleb turned over to look at him, then turned back, just as the camera looked at him, he changed his expression initially but changed it back to a smile.
"You surprised we have this in my farm, huh?"
"Actually, I am. It's so unexpected."
At this point, the Pachyrhinosaurus came over and stood right behind Caleb.
"I made him myself. He's a male. His name is Bernard. Hey, Bernard, say hello."
"Hello." Said the dinosaur (voiced by Kevin Michael Richardson).
"Wow. He can talk?"
"But of course. He can indeed."
"How long have you had him?"
"Actually, I made him somewhere in 2007. He was meant to be a birthday gift to someone, but I've been ever forgetful, and occupied with my life and my family. He's a nice, respectful, self-assertive, brave, and loving robot. He's loving too. Of course, he's mostly serious. He's not happy about being a robot. But we give him the support he needs. He's also a helpful hard worker out on the farm. But he's expressive in showing happiness for us when something good goes for us, applicably something good. He can even provide the assistance of picking up any of the kids from school. However, he can only take seven people, and you're better off using a car or truck if you're carrying something like cake in a box. In terms of his other abilities, he can run faster than a car, even a motorcycle, he is able to exhale breath, he can make animalistic sounds, he is very, very strong, he can lift up lots of objects, limited to things like vans that are loaded, he has robotic arms built inside, in case he's needed, and he has to use his hands, he has binocular vision, night vision, can communicate with animals, and one of the best parts? He has built-in afterburners inside him that can come out through his feet, and he'll be able to fly up into the sky. Just make sure you hold tightly onto him. He doesn't ever complain about his work. In fact, in spite of him wanting for more out of life in one thing, he loves all of us, and he's happy for us regardless. But that doesn't mean we haven't tried to make him happy. But before I tell you about that, let me tell you the best part about him: he's made out of titanium! It's a rare achievement for me to do that, and I did it. I worked hard to make sure he's bullet-proof, fire-proof, blast-proof, water-proof, even food-proof and electric-proof. He may be indestructible on the outside, but from the parts I've put in and the work I've done, that doesn't mean he's electrocution proof on the inside. He's also only mostly blast-proof on the inside."
*Cut to Bernard ramming another robotic Pachyrhinosaurus, this one was painted with the colorings of a short-eared owl on the foam skin, and unlike Bernard, he had eyes that actually looked like eyes.*
The two dinosaurs roared and bellowed as they rammed into each other, one trying to push the other, they pushed each other into a standstill, but then Bernard was slowly pushing his opponent away. The other Pachyrhinosaurus backed up a little bit and charged him, Bernard charged at him and they rammed each other again. They exchanged roars at each other, and slowy circled each other. They looked at each other seriously, they gazed at them tensely, for five minutes. They exchanged growls with each other. They stood still for three minutes. Then, they charged each other and rammed into each other again, pushing back against the other, one was pushed back, then the other was pushed back. Bernard stood still, forcing his opponent into a standstill. He clenched his teeth. From a short distance, Caleb watched the fight, as his son, Milo was using a remote control without an antenna. The two ceratopsians struggled to push the other away. Bernard roared again, pushed his head at the other dinosaur, swung his head into his opponent, rammed 3 times into it, Milo tried to get it back into action, but Bernard charged into it and knocked it into the ground, and roared in victory!
*Cut to Caleb and Milo, with the two robots standing by their sides. Caleb had his right hand on his son's left shoulder.*
"Now, my way of helping Bernard, was to make another robot for him to stimulate himself. Unlike Bernard, this dinosaur is remote controlled. In terms of eyes, I saved and spent so much money into getting everything needed to make Bernard, I didn't have enough money to make buy actual eyes for him, so I used two electronic trapezoids as the next best thing. With the dinosaur used for Bernard in combat, he has the colorings of a short-eared owl. I saw a short-eared owl in a book when I was a teenager, I thought about it when I was drawing the blueprints for this robot. I thought it would look cool. Who would've thought that decades later from the 1940's, when the Pachyrhinosaurus was first discovered, that evolutionists would hold as a fact of evolution (not that I'm an evolutionist), that dinosaurs were related to birds? Anyway, I thought the owl's colorings on this robot looked cool, and it turned out to live up to my thought when I was finished. Another thing, unlike Bernard, this robot cannot speak in human language, he wasn't programmed to, and he is made out of steel. He's more likely to get damaged, but he has the same features as Bernard. He can also be used for variable farm work too. And Bernard has a memory computer chip, placed inside a memory storage unit I built and placed inside him myself. Bernard was both programmed to speak as a human, and his memory chip also has his voice as part of it (and his emotions are also part of the memory chip). If Bernard ends up getting destroyed, I can always use this robot to place his chip inside, who also has a memory chip storage unit I built inside him I've had to adjust those units as times changed more than once, and let me tell you. It was not easy. I'm also experienced at making comupter chips of memory and voices. Bernard is solar-powered. At nighttime, Bernard can shut himself off at 10:30 PM, but the other dinosaur can be turned off with the use of the remote control at any time. And Bernard's memory chip, it has downloaded memory of most of the fighting skills of every type of combat in the history of the world (which had to be updated several times. Not just kung fu, not just wrestling, but mostly all fighting styles in the world. That makes him even more of a lethal fighter, if he was with any of my kids, and you messed with one of them, he'll make sure you regret it, if you were something like a mugger for example."
"Interesting." The female interviewer said.
"Even though, I've been continuously been forgetting to give him as a birthday gift, Bernard's shown his usefulness in farm work in variable things. Shortly changing the subject, as paleontological views and portrayals and dinosaurs have changed, me, I kept my robots as they are. I don't approve of the fact that some species of dinosaurs had feathers. I find it ridiculous. I don't care that Pachyrhinosaurus couldn't gallop. And don't get me started on the quadrupedal portrayal of Spinosaurus. So, Bernard's been a loyal robot, another way I can satisfy him, is joining him on scenic trips, joining him on walking across wide open spaces, the city, I even let him do things that satisfy him by himself. We even play ball games like basketball together, or even frisbee. Now, with his size, he's unable to fit inside the house. His job as a farm worker also makes him useful in scaring away wild carnivores, like coyotes. But ever since 2015, things have been getting stranger. Variably foreign and non-native animals have been living in variable states of this country, I've read and watched news stories about it too. African lions, African bush pigs, red river hogs, ostriches, grizzly bears, red kangaroos, Siberian tigers, American crocodiles, American alligators, etc. Have you seen these news stories?"
"i've seen a few of them. It's crazy."
"I'll say. What is going on here? And somehow, they're thriving. A few times, grizzly bears would come across our farm. Me, my older sons, my farm hands, and Bernard would use guns, with Bernard being able to get closer, to scare them away. Same thing happened with big cats. It wasn't this serious before. It used to be just animals like cougars and coyotes, on chance encounters. Three instances, when we were leading our herd of cattle across a river, some members fell as prey to alligators and crocodiles. Milo, Kira, & Esther were nearly attacked by a pride of lions, individually, on 3 separate instances."
Meanwhile, a group of 7 goats were standing together in a row, surrounded by two hand-built wooden racks that had 6 rows of ramps, some had stairs connected to them. Kira was motioning with a cue stick in her hand, left and right, in front of a bigger group of goats behind her. One group of 6 goats walked to the right rack in single file, They walked up the first ramp, one by one, and jumped across the bottom row, one by one, turning themselves around, so they'd be facing the 9 year old girl. She motioned for the next group. The third group, 5 goats went to the left rack, went up the second ramp, jumped across the second row, and turned around. There were now 3 groups of goats stacked upon each other so far. Kira motioned with her hand. Another group of 4 goats went to the right rack, went up the third ramp, jumped across, and turned. Kira motioned again. Now, three goats went to the left rack, went up the fourth ramp, jumped across, and turned. Kira made another motion, only two goats made their way now to their growing stack of goats. They went to the right rack, went up the fifth ramp, jumped across, and turned. With one more motion, just one goat went to the left rack, went up the 6th ramp by running, jumped cross, landed onto the two standing, goats, balanced itself and turned carefully. The stack was complete now. It was a pyramid stack of goats. Kira smiled in proudness and joy as she spread her arms. She spoke a command, and the goats all bleated simultaneously. Kira clapped in joy. She hand motioned and spoke, and one by one, the goats would quickly return to the respectively placed ramps, and came down, while the 7 goats at the bottom would leave once the first row of goats got off of them. Kira motioned for them with her hand to stop, and with another hand motioned, they lined up in single file, and they would pass Kira, as she fed them one by one, with a handful of cheerios, as she grabbed them out of a bucket, as they passed her. The next second, Kira could hear the husky barking. She smiled as she saw it rushing towards her and opened her arms. She hugged the dog, as he would then lick her face.
*Cut to Kira in front of the two racks, facing the camera, with her left arm over the husky, and her right arm over one of the goats.*
"I've been training animals of different kinds ever since I've been living here for years. No matter how many times lots of those animals have been sold. But I have to tell you, it's not easy for me to train animals. Not only depending on the species and the trick or whatever, but because I'm juggling what to do with my free time, with homework and variable work at home. Home as in the farm, and cleaning in the house. This is our husky, Cade. Years ago, Mom and Dad felt like getting a herd dog. But, we were told that they were feeling, in their hearts, to get a husky instead. And so, Cade became part of us, as a puppy. Nobody believed that Cade would be useful as a herding dog, but we all loved him anything, since huskies lived as sled dogs. But I felt in my mind, and my heart, that I should try to help him defy that purpose. Among the animals I've been training in the farm, I spent the most time, effort, and patience into trying to teach him how to herd sheep and cattle. It didn't start out easy, he had a different temperament, compared to actual sheep herding dog breeds. It was difficult for the first couple of years, I was even trying to teach him to kill gophers and rats, chase away coyotes, and run alongside horses, as long as he doesn't get hurt, while still taking risks, but I was determined and patient, and through the yearly process, I've been getting better at teaching him how to be a herding dog, and other things, but I didn't do it alone. Some of my family members joined in and helped me teach Cade. We also taught him how to be an aggressive and protective dog, when it counts. Me and everyone else, we consider Cade family. He's loyal, protective, loving, and caring. He loves to play too. Too bad he didn't mate with another husky. Cade is very useful when it comes to herding cattle and sheep. He's even useful in sniffing out things, and chasing away variable other animals. We've been training him to sniff out objects for 3 years. We've been recording his speed at sniffing things, and he's been getting faster and faster at finding an object, by scent. I've also been teaching Cade how to do tricks, like roll over, dance on two legs, and stacking himself on an animal, or how to stand while another animal stands on top of him. Watch this." Kira shortly left the camera, came back with a ball, and balanced it on Cade's head. The husky stood still, watched by Kira and the goat for 10 minutes, the ball stood still on him, without ever falling off. Kira turned to the camera. "What do you think?"
"Not bad, kid. Great job."
"Thanks. Now, if only I could train more challenging animals, and show my talent for it to people. Like big cats, elephants, orcas." She said as she raised her arms and looked up to the sky in excitement and imagination. But then, after 2 minutes, her face had changed into an upset face, and she soon became mortified. Her mind was blank. Cade and the goat understood this too well. Kira quickly shook her head. She looked at the camera, nervously smiled, and blushed.
"I'm so sorry. I-I was going through some bad memories."
"That's okay."
Meanwhile, there was a lot of poop scattered across the ground, in an animal pen. Antonio was picking up the poop, and 3 feet by his side was a robot. He was Lincoln Loud's height, had an almost thin rectangular head, a cube shaped body (with a small power switch on top of it, in the center, almost at the edge) a small closed rectangular area that indicated a storage unit on the top left of the front of his body, rectangular shaped feet, metallic hands and fingers, and his arms looked like metallic cords, he had orange eyes, and a smile that was yellow. They did their parts, picking up poop and putting them into their own bags, with their hands that picked up the poop, in plastic bags of their own.
"Picking up shit is the worst. How did shitting out your own digested food happen in the first place anyway? Why did it come to be?" The robot complained (voiced by William Salyers). Whenever he'd speak, his smiling mouth would light up bright yellow, with the bright yellow spreading out from the middle. Otherwise, if he wasn't speaking, his smile would be dark yellow. And whenever he'd show different emotions, or even doing anything like leaving his eyes half-lidded, a variable amount of his eyes would become a darker orange (if he was turned off, they'd be completely a darker orange). And if his eyes were squinting or closing in representation, there would be thin light orange lines in the center, on applicable emotions. If he was off, his smile would be entirely dark yellow, and his eyes would entirely be dark orange.
"You know we have to do this, Marco. It's one of the things that we ever have to do on the farm." Anthony replied. He and Marco picked up the poop, filling in their own bags with poop until there was no more poop left. Then, they threw away the bags in a plastic trash bin, the ones with poop and the ones that covered their hands, went into the bathroom, and washed their hands.
*Cut to Antonio and Marco in front of a pen, full of sheep.*
"This is something my dad made. His name is Marco. He was made when Dad realized, that while Bernard would be a useful cartetaker for this person he was supposed to give as a birthday present lots of times, at some point he saw that Bernard would be too big to fit in this person's house. So, in March 2009, he made Marco, as another caretaker for this person who Dad meant for, as well as a birthday present. He's intent on giving both of them as birthday presents, servants, and protectors." Marco soon walked away, but Antonio didn't care.
"He's tolerable, he helps us out at work. But, he's even lazier than my little brother, Milo. Yet, he's made a few more inventions than Milo. He made a tray on wheels, that can elevate itself up, but it's limited to one bed mattress, it can't elevate itself up to another mattress in a bunk bed, he made two teleportation machines, and he also made a longer set of arms, for situations where he's too short to reach things that are out of his grasp. On a side note, my dad's downloaded knowledge of robotics inventing and the knowledge of topics into him and Bernard, well, into their memory chips (Marco's memory chip also has emotions as part of it). Updates of information had to be downloaded as time went on. Marco may be someone we tolerate, but sometimes, he's a douchebag. Lots of times, he doesn't respect a lot of people out in public, he doesn't respect us a lot, there aren't days where we don't wish we would be rid of him. Well, he does respect Esther, though. She's the person who keeps his morality in balance. And he does respect Regina too. Marco is a nutjob who always wants to have his way. Dad's always wanted to just clear out his memory and give him a new personality. Yet, for some reason, he doesn't go through with it. He finds it very confusing. And for some reason, we don't encourage him to go through with just shutting down Marco. But we don't hold it against Dad. Marco can be crazy, selfish, irresponsible, and foolish. But figuratively, he has a heart of gold. He has shown genuine kindess and selflessness slightly more than half of the time. We've seen it for ourselves. 1 more thing about him. He has an emergency mode, for applicable situations at least. He's voice commanded, if you say 'Activate emergency mode,' he'll put his arms inside, and a different pair of arms come out of them, with buzz saws, instead of hands. They're also useful for sawing wood and lumber."
"Mhm." Said the interviewer.
"He still goes out of his way to help any of our family members out when it counts. Marco also happens to love cats and ferrets. But other than with Esther and Regina, he sees no problem with being troublesome and being a burden in our lives. Now here's something about Marco and Bernard. They are charged by solar power, so Dad saved lots of money to get solar panels for the two of them, but they're not built into them. They have to be drilled in with screws, on Bernard's back, and on top of Bernard's body, in front of his head."
"Mhm. How close are you to your siblings?"
"Very close. As long as I can, I go out of my way to help my family in variable situations. I'm not afraid to put myself in variably dangerous situations, I'm willing to hear all sides of the story in a situation, and I even take over a few chores in my family on rare occasions. We must keep ourselves together. A family is all about supporting each other. Although, I'm not as enthusiastic and daring about putting myself into dangerous situations as Kevin."
*Cut to Skyler, sitting on his bed in his bedroom.*
"Not only did I make a website for myself. I've made a website for the family farm. Take a look." He showed the front page for the Regular family farm on his iPad.
"Nice."
Skyler put down the iPad. "Thanks. We get some more chance of getting noticed. This helps people who are looking for a job in farm work and similar work, and on a side note, we also take in interns, for the summer and winter anyway. It's hard work for a lot of every year. Rarely do we get scandals that are even harder on us. Until 2017, that is. And it's not just the wild animals. Anyway, I may be someone who works on website designing, but I still do my part on the farm. There are different chores that we must do with varying degrees of difficulty. We must watch the cattle, sheep, goats, milk them too, feed the animals, water the trees, fruit, and vegetables, drive away unwanted animals, pick up droppings, pull out weeds and unnecessary foliage, kill gophers and rats (that's been helped out by a few of us building some box houses for owls), gather up eggs, and keeping our customers. Those are several examples. I have to do virtually every one of those, depending on the instance. I may not be one who likes to get my hands dirty when it comes to picking up poop, but I've gotten used to it. Then, two toco toucans flew onto his bed and walked up next to him.
"Whoa." The interviewer said in surprise."
"You're probably wondering who these are." Skyler said, as he petted the toucans on the head. "These are our toco toucans. William and Myra. They're siblings. They were bought as juveniles by Mom and Dad, as a birthday present for Milo. They thought they'd help him be more responsible. They were kind of right. He put in love and effort to care for them. We all helped out in caring for them anyway. But he only became a third more responsible in his life. Now they're adults. Of course, Mom and Dad underestimated on how toucans must really be cared for. But, we all grew variably close to them, Kira grew the most close to them, Milo grew the second closest to them. As with other animals, Kira would go out of her way to train them to do commands and tricks. Changing the subject, there are times where I can get overwhelmed from the farm work that I do. All of my siblings do at times. And when that happens, we are given breaks to relax. I'm telling you, farm life is not an easy life. Especially when you mix chores with homework and free time. It's difficult. But my parents are understanding of us when we get in stressful situations concerning two of those things. Three of the chores I'm the most good at, are shearing wool off of the sheep, collecting eggs, and feeding the animals, and three of the chores I'm the least efficient at, are setting up fencing, bringing in pigs (they can be assertive and violent, and I'm not as tough as Kevin), and lifting heavy objects. But regardless, I do my part on the farm. I do my hard work, and good things come out of my hard work. Shortly changing the subject, Cade and William and Myra close to each other, and several of us worked together on building a large cage for the birds that can be spacious for them. Marco, of all people, also built a less large indoor cage, for the two of them. That's actually really sweet of him. And he said it's because he felt like it would've saved my family the trouble of building or buying a pre-made cage, so he bought the parts he built. Yes, he gets paid. Not as much as us, what with his lazinesss, and he's greedy for money. But he sure saved money. And another thing, he's talented in riding on a unicycle that he saved money for himself, and juggling not three, not four, not even five, but 20, 20 tennis balls. Don't believe me? Take a look for yourself. That's the one work-related thing he has the most motivation for. In fact, he goes and does this in the city." I recorded this myself. Skyler went through his iPad, until he selected and played a video, showing to the camera, Marco juggling 20 tennis balls, while riding a unicycle.
"Wow. Amazing." The interviewer said in surprise.
*Cut to Amanda, Esther, Kira, and Regina in the henhouse.*
These two women and two girls, are collecting eggs. They have baskets of variable amounts of eggs. They're all doing their parts in collecting eggs from the chickens. They all put their hands under the chickens, and two by two, collect the eggs, and put them in the basket. They continue this, putting their hands under the chickens, taking their eggs, and putting them in the baskets. This went on for a while, until most of them had their baskets full of eggs. Regina looked upset, but shrugged. And with that, they went out of the henhouse.
*Cut to Kira, Esther, Amanda, and Regina standing outside of the henhouse, with Amanda putting her arms around Esther and Regina.*
"Me and Caleb have put in effort, we were motivated by our love, and we've all become very close to our children. On variable levels anyway." Amanda said. "We support each other, like dolphins in a pod, like white cells in a body, like bones in a skeleton. And don't worry, we washed our hands after we collected the eggs. For all of our faults, we work together, and we are quite functional. We will support each other through thick and thin. We support each other on variable different things. You should hear this. My kids, a little bit often, work together on their homework in the living room, or outside. The younger ones even look to the older ones for help on homework sometimes. In farm work, obviously, they are quite the hard workers, difficult as it is."
*Cut to a close-up on a praying mantis' face.*
"You a beautiful mantis. You know that, right?" Milo's voice spake. "You a beautiful invertebrate. You are a unique creation from God." *The camera pans out and shows Milo looking admirably at the mantis in a small terrarium. There were sticks and rocks put in there. The boy was sitting on his bed in his bedroom. Surrounding him were other small terrariums containing different invertebrates, a black widow was in one of the terrariums. Two grasshoppers were in another one of the terrariums. Milo looked up.* "Hiya. Here's something you don't know about me. I'm almost enthusiastic about terrestrial invertebrates as much as I am with dinosaurs. Mantis looked like attractive invertebrates. I took it upon myself to take a mantis for an animal companion. I took a female. I had to read a book on how to tell the genders. I named this one Quinley. I learned interesting things about the mantis. I'm a lazy person, but I don't slack on finding crickets for the mantis to eat. I don't slack on finding prey for the carnivorous invertebrates I keep in my room. My family thinks it's impractical, and too dangerous for me to keep a black widow, but I don't let it get to me. Anyway, I find crickets, I put them in Quinley's terrarium, and I watch as she attacks and eats. Changing the subject, here's another thing about me. Lots of people will either consider dogs, cats, etc to be the best pets, me, I believe mantis are the best pets. Why, you may ask? The mantis may not be as big as a Golden Retriever, or as-however you'd positively describe a chameleon, but mantis aren't noisy, they don't shed, and they don't need to be fed large amounts of food, nor have big droppings. Speaking of which, I don't slack on feeding the toucans, William and Myra either. I'm a boy who most prefers having invertebrates, particularly mantis as an animal companion. I don't call animals who live with me, as pets. In fact, I also describe them as family, as mutual as it may not be between all of us. Invertebrates don't really have the same mentality as dolphins for example, as far as I know. Quinley isn't the first mantis that I had for an animal companion. There were past times that I had caught mantis, as I wandered by myself (now I have to wander an open area with a group or with Bernard, what with the increased danger of wild animals), I would have fun watching them, I would protect them as I guided them throughout the house for showing it to them, although they're not enthusiastic about getting to be familiar with the areas in my house, same for the other invertebrates. Now, I am aware which invertebrates are dangerous, and which ones aren't. Now I have to be careful when it comes to dealing with less than safe invertebrates, like arachnids and centipedes. More than once, my family had tried to talk me out of handling venomous invertebrates. It's not like they're exactly wrong, but I still do it anyway. I stopped anyway, out of choice, 2 months ago. We were all pretty fortunate that none of us, nor any of our larger animal companions got bitten by any venomous invertebrates for all the years that I've been taking care of them. I wouldn't feel good if Regina ever got bitten by a black widow, or even Mom or Dad. Collecting invertebrates is one of the things I don't slack off at doing, homework either. It may not be an enjoyable thing for me to do, but I don't want to get bad grades, and be given a hard time by my parents for it. Even though I know they wouldn't constantly do that. Me and most of my siblings get grades from A to D. But our parents are fine with that. I keep my invertebrates' terrariums on a wooden shelf. I keep them on the highest parts. I put the non-venomous ones in the front, and I put the venomous ones in the back. That way, they don't cause anyone trouble in case of an accident. And my older siblings are smart and sensible enough not to cause any accidents. Too bad I can't keep them forever."
*Cut to Caleb and Amanda, sitting in front of the mirror and dresser chest, in their bedroom. Caleb sat on the left, and Amanda sat on the right.*
"It's not easy for us to spend time with all of our kids. When it comes to work and having free time, they have the easiest time on summer vacation." Caleb said. "Now, when it comes to us spending time with all of us, we used to schedule time for them from oldest to youngest, every week, and once, we finished spending time with the youngest, we would start all over again, with the oldest, by the next week. But we'll make exceptions if we're really need for situations like helping with very difficult homework, Milo & Antonio are the best at mathematics. As of 2010, however, we changed that to just spending time with them randomly, sometimes, we spend time with variable groups of them, either the two of us are together with one group, or we're with two different groups, individually, depending on the topic of them. The sizes of the groups will vary in either case." *The camera moves over to the left, and zooms into a framed photo, and it enhanced to show a younger Caleb Regular in a graduation uniform in the center left, with a younger Albert Loud in the center right, a younger Amanda dressed in a uniform on the right, and a younger Rita Loud, on the left. "What are you looking at?" Caleb asked, and the camera immediately panned out back to him and his wife.
"Oh, we're sorry. We were attracted by a photo to your left. You and your wife are dressed in graduation uniforms, and is that woman to the far left, Rita Loud, from one of the families who's being interviewed? And who's that old man?" The interviewer asked.
The Regular parents became surprised as the patriarch took a look. "Oh, I see what you're talking about." Spoke Caleb. "Yes. That is Rita Loud. Here's something you don't know about me. I'll change the subject. Rita Loud is my younger sister. The old man in the photo, Albert is our dad. And he was a heck of a war veteran, I'll say for sure."
"Wow. That is so unexpected."
"I was born two years, before Rita. Amanda was born 2 months and one week after me. When we were younger, I would let Amanda spend time with Rita sometimes. Back then, from what I remember, Amanda was 5 inches taller than Rita. Now, Rita just may be as tall as her. Now, I was insecure at first when Amanda was pregnant. I was always unsure I would be a great dad. But I was always assured by my dad and sister. I became confident, and sure enough, as the years passed by, I wasn't a bad dad by a whole lot. I'm not a perfect dad though."
"I'll say." Amanda snarked.
"What was that?" Caleb turned to her, but she said nothing, she quickly changed her face too before he turned, and then he turned back to the camera. "Anyway, in the years before Amanda and I moved here, Rita met Lynn Loud, and long story short, they married at a later point in life. Dad and Amanda got to know them, and they like them, me, I've gotten to know him for years, and unlike the other two, I don't like him and I don't really respect him much, especially from what I've heard later in life. He doesn't act like a tough guy, he doesn't act enough like a man, he's cowardly, he doesn't really appeal to me positively, a lot. When it comes to him being a parent, he takes the side of his daughters more than his only son, Lincoln Loud, the boy with white hair, Lynn doesn't take Lincoln's side enough, he was so clingy to an old van of his before it got destroyed and they had to get a new one. That does not sound like a good parent or a husband. And just as bad, Rita also doesn't support Lincoln enough, close as I have been told that they are to each other. She also takes the side of the girls over Lincoln. I've heard several stories from Rita at times where Lincoln does bad things, but in my heart, I feel there is more to the truth then what she says, for example, I was told that Lincoln was responsible for him and his sisters getting banned from a grocery store, but I feel that he wasn't the person responsible for that. And then there are stories, I legitimately believe, like the time he tried to stall a parent-teacher meeting from happening. I don't know what Rita saw in Lynn back then, and I still don't now, nor do I see what. Rita was someone I could respect back before she married Lynn. Nowadays, the only things I respect her and her idiot husband for, is for actually acting like parents and righting their daughters when it counts, Lynn opening a restaurant, and his cooking (I've tasted food he cooked, it's great, I'll give him that). Other than that, I mostly don't respect them. And don't get me started on their daughters. I've been told certain details of that. Lori is bossy, acts like a jerk, isn't above using violence for applicably anything, threatens her brother for being in her room, is so obsessed with her boyfriend, and her phone, Luan can be repetitive when she tells jokes, every day (can't she learn to shut her mouth and quit being such a windbag), not to mention she went to such extreme pranking on April Fools, what the hey, at least she stopped, Lynn Jr. was superstitious, believed in sports gods (oh give me a break), she can be violent, she used to be obsessed with winning, Lucy, she's too unrelatable, she has depression that she needs to be rid of, she practices magic, that is a major thing me and my wife prohibit in our family and in our house, we consider it a major problem, Lucy also has a thing for casting spells, summoning spirits, fortune telling. What kind of messed up mentality does she have here? Frankly, I don't feel any of my kids would be safe around her. Not to mention, she has a thing for constantly coming in and scaring people in surprise. That also needs to stop. Lana is a girl who constantly goes around eating trash, bringing mud into the house, she brings potentially dangerous animals into the house, she had too many of them, Lola is selfish (same with Lori), she's a brat, she can be violent and blackmail people, she's really despicable in my eyes, I think she's the third worst of the Loud children if you ask me, Lucy would be the worst in my eyes, Lori would be the second worst sister, and last, but not least, Lisa, one of the youngest Loud children, she's a child prodigy scientist, but she has no regard for her siblings when it comes to her science experiments, from what I've heard from Rita." Caleb closed his eyes and shook his head. "What kind of messed up family is that? Leni is an idiot, Luna is a rock and roll player, who used to play her music so loudly, Lily is still a baby, Lincoln is close to those three, same with Lucy and Lana, but with the girls as a whole, another thing that I don't like about them, is a hive-minded mentality they have, they'd turn on Lincoln, they'd act like jerks to him over something, and they can gang up on him too. Those are good ways of showing that they can be antagonistic towards Lincoln. Hmph. For years, I've been debating internally on whether or not I should disown Lincoln and Lucy as my nephew and niece. They both have been practicing magic, but my nephew practiced a different type of magic than Lucy, from what I've been told, but then again, Lucy would've used more than one of her siblings for her magic, from what I've been told before. Luan also practiced magic for entertainment. I debated on disowning her too. But as of a previous week ago this month, I've been told that the Loud parents were cleaning up their act, and finally becoming better parents, I've been told about certain details, like the Loud girls putting many possessions of theirs into the garage, and they were going to be cleansed by religious people from their involvement with magic. I was-proud of those two for all of that, but other than that, same with the girls, and some positive changes a few of the girls did go through, I have nothing but contempt for most of the Louds. Lincoln feels like a troubled boy. Always having to go through a miserable, active, house of antagonism. Same thing at school. I've been told of a few events there. But what fueled my sympathy for Lincoln, is when he was starring in a movie. Of course, the movie turned out to be a disaster. The topic of it wasn't really something I supported, it was related to something called Ace Savvy, but I felt great sympathy for him. The movie was a terrible movie, in terms of the writing, CGI, and special effects. I heard it was something he was really looking forward to. He, his best friend, and his sisters all had a chance to make an appearance in it. I felt sorry for those two boys. I used to feel sorry for most of the girls, but then I heard that they initially stole characters he made based on them (even the nicer sisters he was closer to), all they cared about was being in the movie, nothing more, same with the two judges at a previous convention, who were being very disrespectful, they also stole the boy's characters initially. And so, my contempt for most of the girls grew for another portion, and I believe they deserved the humiliation at the premiere. Believe it or not, I do indeed love my sister and nieces, even Lynn Sr., for all of his faults, but I only have pity and sympathy for Lincoln, and Lily. And I had a bad feeling that Lily would be ending up becoming a jerk to him as she gets older. And yeah, I was told that Lincoln had done something immoral during the convention, but still. He and his friend were the creators. Nothing justifies them being stolen from. In my heart, I had felt that, he's better off without most of them. To me, most of the Louds come off as bad influences for him. The more they treat him poorly, the longer he'll make bad choices of his own. And, this will be a controversial statement, but in spite of the religion I am part of, I had no sympathy for the Ace Savvy judges who were later slain by an unknown person. You know, the worst thing I would hear about Rita and Lynn, is either if they didn't ever love Lincoln, or if they stopped loving him at some point in his life, or if they were patronizing towards him. Sometimes, I feel they are. Another one thing that would really be the worst thing above all, that I'd hear, is if they abused him in any way(s), even at just one point. Same with the girls. I was very disappointed to hear that Rita stooped to committing crimes to get community service, and she got arrested. Dad told me that, and he said he was disappointed in her for that too. You should've seen me when I was criticizing her for her selfish choices. Now, when I heard about Rita and Lynn making the changes this month, I only respected them by almost a third. Just almost a third. 1 more thing, I haven't written down so many things on paper, but I've been hearing so many stories concerning Lincoln and the girls, and it seems to me, that Lincoln's suffered more than his share of his misfortunes, and I feel that contrary to what I'm told (from Rita's point of view), I feel that the girls get off with their misdeeds a lot of times."
"Oh my." The interviewer said. "Uh, can we focus on you, Ms. Regular?"
"Of course." Amanda answered.
"So, if I'm not wrong, are you the one who always had Regular for a last name?"
"Indeed, I am. Caleb used to have a different last name before we got married. Next subject, in terms of religion, Caleb and his family weren't pork eaters. I used to be Catholic, but Caleb was not Catholic at all, neither were his family. Anyway, Caleb was friends with someone who was a Seventh-Day Adventist. He got to learn about the lifestyle, he became fascinated with it, he decided to become one, he introduced me to it, I was drawn into it, and I changed my religion to Seventh-Day Adventist. However, it didn't sit well with my parents. They didn't respect my husband for it, they didn't like him for that either. It went like that for a few years, until they apologized, decided to hear Caleb's story, information about it, they felt in their hearts to convert to that, and they went through with becoming SDA's themselves. Everybody wins. Now, Lynn and his parents weren't Catholic. And yet, for some reason, they came to eat pork at some point in their lives. That's not the only unclean food they would eat though."
"Yeah." Caleb spoke in a low voice. "The mystery meat that Dad would eat, there were times that the meat was rattlesnake. But among the changes that the Loud parents had made, no longer eating unclean foods was part of them, so was turning over a new leaf and being better at parenting. The first part was told to me by Rita and Dad."
"Mhm. How much do your families visit each other?"
The Regular parents sported guilty faces from hearing that faces. Soon, Amanda spoke up.
"We don't visit each other a lot. Or even a little. It started like this. It was after I graduated college, that my parents and I were moving to California. They felt like moving somewhere else where they thought they could live better financially. That turned out to be an impulsive move on their parts in hindsight. Caleb spent his remaining time in college until he was done with becoming licensed at robotics inventing. After graduating college, he came to join me and live in California. We had a strong love that we were patient enough to wait for the time we'd be reunited with each other. He wanted to stay with me, more than applicably anything. And after that, we spent our lives in California, running our farm, inventing robots, landscaping, for work, while raising our kids. When it came to us and the Louds, we didn't get to visit them, nor did they visit us. Big families can make it harder to save money for things like going to theme parks or buying TV's for the entire family. The last time we saw the Loud family, was when Caleb's mom died, and we went to Royal Woods for the funeral. It was, at a certain point when Rita was pregnant with Lucy. And the first time was during the funeral for Lynn Sr's dad. It's only Caleb who keeps in touch with Rita and Albert through the phone. He calls her a lot, she calls half often, but my husband has the easiest time then all of us when we have enough on our shoulders with the farm, our personal lives, our jobs, and the kids and their school lives. None of us even called to talk with any of the Loud kids. Shame on us. It's rather sad. Shortly changing the subject, at least Caleb kept in touch with Albert and Rita. We are very occupied to call any of the Louds (not to mention, not once did it cross our minds for us to talk with any other of our relatives. Shame on us), I'm sure the Louds are too occupied. But now that's all going to change. Costly as it is."
"What do you mean?"
"Ever since March 13, 2017, we've been getting overshadowed by more successful farms in the countryside. They've been gradually taking our customers as the years went. Not to mention, we've been given a harder time by new wild animals. That's not to say the other farms haven't. As a result, we've been having a harder time trying to keep our farm afloat, but we've been gradually only getting a little bit further ahead in retrospect, no matter what ways we tried to get our customers back. It's been getting harder to keep our farm hands too. The only thing that has been helping us stay afloat was my job at robot company, and my wife's job. But 2 days ago, our workplaces had gone out of business. The possibility of this happening was classified from me and the other workers, by our boss. He didn't want us to worry. He meant well. But that day has ultimately come. What happened that caused this tragedy was we were ultimately unable to make enough robots to meet supply, and as a result it didn't meet demand. We were unable to obtain more metal at the time. Thankfully for my boss, he was old enough to retire. As for Amanda, her company was shutting down her branch that she works for, because they saw it as among the least profitable, and they were trying to cut costs at the time. But here's where the next part comes in: the executives of Mt. Preston Robotics announced they are moving all workers to the factory in Royal Woods, Michigan, which recently finished construction, they even provided us money to move our belongings and vehicles by plane (but it's optional for all of us). Isn't that so surprising? Me and my wife talked it over, and we decided that we'll move there. Oh, the landscaping company that my wife worked for, it went out of business, and they're also offering an optional move for everyone who worked here, along with jobs in the branch in Royal Woods. So, if we move there, it's a win-win. We'll live in the suburbs, and we'll work our way up, mostly saving money for the land that we'll need, to restart our farm, and optionally, build a house. With any good fortune, Skyler can help advertise our farm, and we can get more money faster. Until then, hopefully, we'll live close to the Louds, as much as I don't respect most of them. Even though I don't feel my kids are safe with them, I will let them hang out with the Loud family. Although, my kids had different opinions in response to us moving away."
Now, Amanda spoke up. "Right." She snarked. "Now, Caleb may not have a high opinion of most of the Louds, but I don't see things like that. At least we don't argue so severely about it. I believe they are indeed good people. They're just misguided. And the changes that Caleb told me the Loud parents were making are a step in the right direction. 3 more things that are certainly steps in the right direction, are the revelations that the girls will change their ways, Lincoln will learn to be more self-assertive, and the Louds will go see a therapist. Them getting cleansed from the affiliation with magic is certainly a step in the right direction."
"Yeah, yeah." Caleb said calmly.
"I'm sure the Louds love Lincoln. Even the girls that my husband thinks are the worst. They just have trouble properly showing it in their own rights. I don't think they're horrible. I'm sure about that. In my heart. I'm sure that there's more to them than my husband thinks. I already had visions of my children and nieces and nephew getting along with each other happily. I already feel that they can in my heart. I can't wait for when we meet each other. One more thing, my husband doesn't believe that only Catholic and Mormon families can have lots of kids. And well, I can agree about the fact that we certainly have lots of kids, and we're Seventh-Day Adventists. I speak for my husband and myself when I say no offense, Catholic and Mormon people, and Christianity in general."
*Cut to the Regular family in the dining room. The camera focuses on them, and turns left and right, when it counts.*
The Regulars were having lunch. They had different meals of their own. Caleb drank water while having his meal. Milo was eating beef hot dogs with a salad. He took a look at the ranch dressing. It was on the far left, on the other side, it was between Antonio and Esther. He waved his hand over and motioned for it to be passed to him, Antonio noticed, he pushed it to the other side, Regina passed it to her right, then Rico, then Savannah, and finally it was passed on to him. He opened the bottle, poured it on the salad, and continued to eat. Esther was having chicken and rice. She pushed pieces of chicken onto her fork with her knife, and she raised the fork and put into her mouth. Then, she pushed rice onto her fork, and ate it too. She could see that the bowl with salad was a little bit out of her reach to the left, and she got up from her chair, Kevin could see this for himself. He passed it over to Skyler, and then Esther, and she put some of the salad onto her plate. Amanda and Caleb watched their kids momentarily while they were eating. Caleb was already having sad feelings about their home here. Cade watched as the family ate their food. Marco watched the family eat, while leaning back against a wall, and his arms were crossed, the camera noticed that Bernard watched the family through the window, he's been doing this for a while, before he then walked away, his body passing the window until it was out of view.
*Cut to Kira Regular walking up to her room. Between her was two beds. The one on the left side was hers, the one on the right, which had a medium stuffed giant panda sitting on it. The camera was focused on this. In front of Kira was a large brachiosaurus head sculpture. It almost looked like it was smiling. And it had medium pupils in its eyes.*
"So, this is my room and Regina's room. We're roommates."
"Uh, what's with the dinosaur head?" The interviewer asked.
"Oh, that. Dad got the dinosaur head for Regina as a birthday present. She absolutely loved it. We were okay with it at first. But as time went on, with the way it looks, it looked creepy at first. We tried to get rid of it once, but she was silently sad. She has some sort of love for it. She could only go through half of a day without her brachiosaurus head. We felt guilty, and we managed to get it back. Nowadays, we're more used to it, but sometimes it still creeps us out. But somehow, not Regina. But I don't take it out on her." After that, Kira went to sit down on her bed, and the camera would focus on her all the way.
"So, what do you think about your relatives, the Louds, if you've ever been told about them before today? And how do you feel about the revelation that you're moving to Royal Woods?"
"I have four role models in my life. Dad, Mom, Pop-Pop (my grandpa), and Lincoln Loud. I'll talk about most of them. Dad is a great person you could have for a dad, he's brave, kind, loving, caring, self-assertive, tough, and hard working. He's my hero. He helped me out when I was being bullied several times. In fact, he partly taught me how to fight in hand-to-hand combat. We bond with each other through different things, including fishing, farmwork, and animals. He is not afraid to stand up for himself (not counting when it comes to the dinosaur head) or for us, if someone doesn't treat any amount of us properly. He's willing to listen to all sides of the story, he's dedicated to righteousness, he's selfless too, he's willing to go out of his way to make his family happy. He and Mom have a happy marriage. I can tell. He's not scared to give someone a piece of his mind, he's willing to put his life in danger as long as he protects any farm animals or me or any of my family. That's bravery right there. Pop-Pop, he's a loving person, he's a war veteran, and he's still able to do things when he was young at his current age, Dad loves and respects him a lot, Dad learned a lot from Pop-Pop. I hear he and Lincoln are close. I hope he and I can be close. Speaking of which, there's Lincoln Loud. From what I've been told and from listening to Dad's point of view, Lincoln isn't exactly as moral as the first two people I mentioned, but he's nice, he's so smart that he can say a speech in presentation (he's also good at presentations), he's talented at making cookies, he puts up with people, no matter who, he's willing to help someone out, and at least he's responsible when it counts. But if you ask me, he shouldn't put up with his sisters any longer. And, I was glad when I heard from Dad that Aunt Rita told him that Lincoln was finally standing up for himself. That is awesome. I felt him disowning most of his family was justified. I've been told of a number of misfortunes. Shortly changing the subject, another one of the things I admire Lincoln for, is that he's able to do a good job at handling his sisters (when it counts), and his talent for making cookies. I hear they're delicious. I want to try some of those. When it comes to his family, I feel like he's a troubled boy when he's living in it. If my dad told you his opinions of most of the Loud girls, then I can agree with him on that. He's told me about them himself. And let me tell you a little bit about Lola, Lori, and Lucy. I cannot believe Lola is part of the Loud family. She sounds so hateful, so insufferable, and I cannot believe she'd threaten Lincoln at times. A far cry from Regina. As for Lori, human pretzels? Are you kidding me? Absolutely none of my older siblings threaten me for being in their rooms, especially like that. She sounds like a jerk. I can't believe she behaves so atrociously, when it comes to treating her siblings badly. And none of mine are attached to their phones like sugary sweets. Ugh. And Lucy, don't make me do something beyond cringe. She feels too unrelatable. Being an emo, scaring people by coming out of nowhere, practicing magic, watching a horror related TV show, doing magic rituals. Eeeghh. I mean, is most of that disturbing or what? Frankly, if it wasn't for my love for my cousins, which I have for them for some reason, I'd never want to call them my cousins. I still have mostly no respect for them, though. Just Lincoln and Lily. I wouldn't want to be any closer to Lucy for more than 10 feet. I'd want Regina away from them, all of the Loud girls, at all. *Sigh* But on one hand, I can't make myself look like a bad sister if I did that, especially if she wanted to interact with them. But if Regina gets scared by Lucy, I'm drawing the line at the first time. The Ace Savvy movie disaster (I read harsh reviews about them), led to me learning about two judges and the girls initially stealing Lincoln and his best friend's, Clyde's characters, and it only fueled my contempt for most of them. And the Ace Savvy movie bombing at the office, the imagination of Lincoln being verbally bashed for something he wasn't responsible for, it-it breaks my heart for my poor cousin." She said as her voice started to break. She sniffled, and pulled back a tear. "He worked hard for something, and when the day came for him to get something else, he ended up being disrespected not once, but twice (in two separate instances). I've heard stories from Dad, concerning Lincoln. As the years would pass, I would continuously believe that Lincoln is living in a toxic house. Why does he put up with them? Why should he, if they're going to be truly ungrateful? I know he's not a saint, but still. I feel sorry for him, every year, as long as I'm not occupied. I feel like his life is as bad as Tilikum." Her eyes quickly shrank as she raised her head. "Although, that's a rather bad comparison, actually. Lincoln didn't ever resort to killing someone. He deserves better in his life. As for my uncle and aunt, I love them, they are at least people I can be physically close to, but I don't trust them. They didn't sound like good parents for years. In spite of the statement I made before the latest one, I agree with Dad. I perceive that most of the Louds are bad influences for Lincoln."
"If you want to talk about something else, how did you react when you learned that you and your family are moving?"
"I had a mixed reaction. On the one hand, I get to meet Lincoln, Lily, and I get to see Pop-Pop (the dad of my dad), same for my other cousins. But I have several friends here. I-I can't just leave them. And, I trained animals here on the farm. It's something that made me really happy. Selling off the farm will just leave us with a dog and 2 toucans. The worst part, my grandparents from Mom's side of the family won't be moving with us. I'm going to miss them. Well, I can try to be strong, this can't be too difficult. I believe I can make new friends, and I do have the numbers of all of the friends I made in LA on my phone, but I still have friends here. Also, I can get recognition in Royal Woods for my rapping and beatboxing, I won't even have to deal with farm work for the years to come, until we have enough money to start our new farm. I'll just have to make the best of the last days while I can. And at least Michigan will have lots of snow in the winter. I love playing in the snow."
*Cut to Milo in his bedroom, sitting on his bed.*
"I have mixed opinions of the Louds. I didn't meet them, but my opinions are mixed. Let's just say in short that there are some people I like, and some others who I don't like, for example, so far, I don't like Luan, Lana, and Lola. No. As for Lincoln, I have mixed feelings about him. He's pretty likable, he's nice, he's selfless, but there are times he doesn't act quite so moral. If you ask me, he's using his intelligence for making plans for the wrong things. He needs to put it to really good use, he's already good at making cookies. He shouldn't just use his thinking for plans that sound less than supportive. I may be lazy, but I don't stoop to trying to stall a parent-teacher meeting. I just let it go on without interference. Changing the subject, it's safe to say that my family is indeed different from Lincoln's-ex-family. I heard he disowned most of them. That surprised me. Anyway, we don't fight each other for money, we have three bathrooms, we're hard workers, we act humble and mature (Kira and I would agree that Lincoln is mature, I'm mostly mature in my family), and we always stand by each other's sides no matter what. Well, most of the time on the last part. If I'm ever caught by one or more of my siblings watching something on TV that is above my age, they will snitch out on me to my parents, I get chased around, I get caught, I get tickled until it stops, and I get grounded. If I ever learn a secret from one of my siblings or friends, on purpose or otherwise, I don't snitch out on them or absolutely anyone else, at all. My siblings may not appreciate that fact, but I don't snitch out on them at all. As long as I don't hear a secret that's too big for me to handle, or on a side note, secrets regarding dark intentions that simply cannot be classified. And that's not to say it hasn't happened before. Also, I don't ever keep secrets with anyone I don't know personally, or make bets or promises that have results and situations that are too big for me to handle, with absolutely anyone. I have mixed opinions about the move. On the one hand, I loved living here and I have friends here, I love it when Grandma and Grandpa visit us. But on the other hand, I accept that the farm is beyond saving. I accept that the farm's situation is against our will."
*Cut to Esther*
"I'm going to miss this place. There were so many great and wonderful memories. But times have changed. I'm sure life in Royal Woods will be mostly great. I can't wait to see my relatives and Pop-Pop. Especially Lincoln, Leni, Luna, and Lily."
*Cut to Antonio.*
"I don't support this. I don't think that they should move this far. I wouldn't be close to visit them. I'm in a college in California. I'm going back there, closely before summer vacation is over, I'll buy a ticket after we move to Michigan. The only good things will be seeing Pop-Pop and our relatives (as problematic as most of them sound, but I don't think they're bad people)."
*Cut to Skyler.*
"How am I supposed to gain attention, and recognition in Michigan? How am I going to fit in? What if I don't make any new friends? I mostly don't support the move. I don't think I can bond well with my cousins. And I think there's nothing we can bond over easily."
*Cut to Regina.*
"I'm mostly excited. I can't wait to see Pop-Pop and my cousins. I can't wait to see Uncle Lynn and Aunt Rita. This is going to be so much fun!"
*Cut to Kevin.*
"I'm in support of this move. I'm confident we'll adapt well. No matter how long it takes for us. I will miss this place, though. I hope I'll be loved by my cousins. I hope I can go kayaking. Shortly changing the subject, one of the things I've done here in California was go climbing mountains. Dad would join me half often."
*Cut to Rico.*
"I'm not supportive here. I have friends, I don't know how well I'll do here. How will I fit in properly at school? I'm not sure if I can get along well with most, if not all of my cousins. At least, I'll see Pop-Pop."
*Cut to Amanda and Caleb sitting together.*
"Eh, there's not really any robotics company that wants me." Caleb said. "They're all full, in Los Angeles. Same thing happened with Amanda. Every other landscaping branch, here is full of workers."
"It's true." Said Amanda.
"Okay." The interviewer said.
"Now, Amanda and I have a loving, happy relationship. But we don't agree on completely everything. In this case, Amanda absolutely wants no cussing in our house, nor in public. I understand her concern, but I don't think it's that big of a problem. I don't think there's entirely something wrong with cussing. As long as Milo, Kira, and Regina don't cuss. Cussing happens, especially if you're hurt."
"But that cannot be allowed Caleb. None of our kids must say anything so foul. Neither must we. We converted to a religion. We must always speak kindly."
"Yes, yes. Still, I can't help it at a few times. And I don't feel uncomfortable when I say it, or one of the older kids would say it." Amanda just deadpanned at it. "Changing the subject, we'll be working on selling off all of our animals, all of the ripe fruit, nuts, and vegetables, the equipment, and the farm. All of the money we get out of it in our share can help with building our money to start our new farm. Changing the subject, Milo may not be perfect, nor Kira, none of my kids are, but make no mistake that absolutely all of our kids are our pride and joy."
*Cut to outside*
The camera focused on the people who were working here in an indoor area. Caleb, Kira, Esther, Amanda, Rico, and Skyler were working with the sheep. They were shearing them. Kira was partnered up with Regina, so the latter wouldn't have to do this herself. Amanda was cutting one ewe's wool with hand shears. Everyone was using hand shears. They took their time, cutting the wool, making sure the hand shears would stay in lines that they were making, while keeping their hands from being cut by the hand shears. The process went slowly. They cut the wool on their respective sheep, so that the amounts of wool would come out perfectly. Once the first amount was done, the wool was piled on a table, then the sheep that were sheared would be taken in one pen, while the next amount of sheep would be taken inside from another. The Regular family members got to work on this. They worked on shearing their next sheep, making lines to make a perfect amount of wool come out, while making sure they don't cut their hands. Kira guided Regina on how to do it right. After another timely process, the wool was piled on, and another group of sheep was taken in. This process would go on for the next near 2 hours to come.
Meanwhile, the camera focused on Caleb, Savannah, Antonio, Milo, Kevin, and 7 other farm workers, they were by the avocado trees. They either reached out for ripe fruit with their hands or fruit picker tools. They had to see which avocados were ripe, and which ones were big enough, though, and most of them were doing a good job, with checking them out on both things. It took a while as they picked the right avocados, and put them in one of the baskets, until the first amount had filled in the basket, but not to the top. They went on to do this for the rest of the avocado trees, checking, picking, filling up the baskets. They worked on them long enough, that they were full. Next, they were at the apple trees. They did the same thing as they did with the avocado trees. They checked which ones were big enough, they checked which ones were ripe, and they filled up the baskets, before moving onto the next apple tree after the first. They continued this again and again, until they were done with absolutely all of the apple trees. After those two sections of trees had their share of fruit being picked, the workers would go put the fruit in crates, and they would put them on a truck, before getting back to the next section of trees. Now, they were in the section of orange trees. Pretty soon, they were joined by Bernard and Marco, carrying baskets of their own, Bernard's basket was a lot bigger than everyone else's baskets. Caleb smiled at the sight of the two robots who came to help, by choice, even though he didn't call them for help. They all got to work, picking the best oranges, ripe and big enough, filled up the baskets until all of them were full, and they continued to do this with sections of two nut trees, squashes, lettuce, cantaloupes, tomatoes, grapes, potatoes, yams, corn, mushrooms, carrots, watermelons, and pumpkins. Another thing about Bernard, he was also able to walk on two legs, and use his front legs as arms, inside his body was a pair of robotic arms that would come out, and he would use them if he made the choice to stand on two legs. Anyway, now he and his group of co-workers had entirely filled up the truck with crates of vegetables, fruit, and nuts. After unloading them and putting them in one of the barns, they would now move on to do their work with the wheat field and the oat field next.
The camera was now watching Kira, as Regina sat on a stool watching her, in expectation. They were in a large rectangular shaped corral. It was filled with hurdles that were made out of logs and branches on two different sides. On the posts that held the hurdles were small hoops. In fact, the hurdles, got increasingly higher, they were placed in a row. Standing on one of the rails were the toucans. The 9 year old, whistled, and two Andalusian horse mares came over. Their manes were decorated with ribbons. Kira held a baton and made a motion with it. The horses did as she commaned, and walked around her. They walked around her in a circle, close to her, for 10 minutes, then she made another motion with her baton to both of them, and they split up the circle, walked in front of the rows of hurdles, and stopped. Kira walked over to them, hand motioned again. The horses began to run, they ran in two opposite directions. One of the horses ran to the lowest hurdle, jumped over it, ran to and jumped over the medium sized hurdle, and then ran and jumped over the highest hurdle. The other horse ran all the way around, jumped over the highest hurdle, ran and jumped over the medium hurdle, and finally ran to and jumped over the lowest hurdle. They ran back to and stopped in front of Kira. Kira rewarded them with an apple for both of them, individually. Next, she moved on to the toucans. She motioned to them, and they took to the sky. They flew down to Kira, and the girl motioned for them, using her baton in her hand, and they flew up. They made a loop-de-loop as they flew past each other, they watched Kira making another motion, and they flew together, making a spiral line, and flew down, they were commanded again, they made something called a camel's humps, they made a line that took the shape of a Bactrian camel's humps. They were commanded one more time, and they flew straight up and made a figure 8. They flew and landed on the rail again. Kira praised them, and took two pieces of oranges and reward them with it, individually. Kira motioned to the horses, and the toucans once again. The animals looked directly at Kira. The toucans landed and perched on the horse's heads. The horses turned around and trotted around the hurdles, as one followed the other for 3 minutes. They walked towards Kira again and stopped. Kira motioned to them again, and the horses neighed and then danced with their front legs. Kira commanded one of them and this one followed her, as she distanced this one from the other one. In fact, she was tapping them in the lower legs actually, near the hocks, and they did as she commanded. Now, she commanded both horses, in different ways, and they danced with trotting their front legs, walking ahead, in a line. They danced around one of the rows of hurdles being guided by Kira as she commanded them for the next thing, and they walked back between the two hurdle rows at the lowest hurdles, and they stood next to each other, the toucans staying on their heads all of the way. Regina was amazed so far throughout this, and she smiled with an open mouth. Kira motioned to the birds and horses again, and the toucans opened up their wings, and the horses ran around the rows of hurdles again in a row, the horse in the back broke off from the other, and the toucans flew off of the horses and made their moves at the right times. The horses separately jumped over the rows of hurdles in different directions, while the toucans would follow behind, going through the hoops, left and right in curvy directions. Then the horses stopped in front of the lowest hurdles, and the toucans flew straight up, made a figure eight, flew back towards and past each other, and made two loop-de-loops, then flew with each other, and onto the horse's heads, and Kira motioned for the horses again, and they stood up on two legs, the toucans held on, and the horses neighed. Regina was clapping a lot, her eyes shrank and her smiled was bigger than before. Kira looked as her sister gave her a thumb's up and continued clapping. Then, she went towards two buckets, and reward the horses and birds, individually, with oats and pieces of orange.
*Cut to Kira and Regina, sitting down outside of the corral, on stools, with Kira's arm over Regina.*
"Regina's always loved seeing me train animals. She enjoys it the most when she sees me showing off my work at letting animals perform."
"Yeah. I always wish she would just decide to become an animal trainer when she grows up. I'm sure she'll be loved and famous for it. I can see it for myself. And I know how much she loves animals."
"Thanks, Regina. At least you're supportive. My family is supportive of me, but you are one of the most supportive."
"That was really amazing. You're great at this. I think you should take your sister's words on this."
"Thanks for those first two statements anyway." Replied Kira.
*Cut to Caleb.*
"Me and my wife always do our part in trying to correct our kids. Now, here's something. We will resort to grounding, but if one or more of our kids does something nearl very serious, we will have to do some spanking. It's controversial, but me and Amanda have talked about it and we will accept doing so, if it will enforce the fact to our kids that they need to be on good behavior, and we will not take it if they do anything that's variably highly unacceptable. I don't see why some people give us flack for using spanking as part of our parenting. If Lola Loud and Luan Loud were my daughters and they did anything beyond seriously, I'd spank them for sure. Changing the subject, the decade I was living in didn't take robotics seriously at first, but as time went on, I could fit in in terms of one of my talents. Robotics inventing is something I'm passionate about. I love it. Getting back to the main subject, I have used it on my kids at times. Thankfully, this helped them, and those who weren't spanked, into shaping themselves into being people who you'd be pleased to spend time with. I hope they all do great in life. I have a feeling we're going to get along well with Lincoln Loud. Oh, and don't let Rita or anyone in her family know that we're moving, please. Or even Dad. I want this to be a big surprise. Ooh, I want to show you something. Follow me."
The camera followed Caleb as he walked across the house, out into the farm, walked across it as well, until they were inside one of the barns. Sitting on some wooden crates were 2 large steel headpieces, that were mixed with a Styracosaurus frill with the six horns, two long Triceratops horns, the top of the Pachyrhinosaurus's head and bump, separate pieces for the Pachyrhinosaurus's horns on the frill, and a Styracosaurus horn at the end of the bump.
"Huh? What do you think?" Caleb asked in expectation.
"Looks amazing. What's it for?"
"I'm glad you asked. I asked a friend of mine to make them. I was thinking it up, after I was stimulating Bernard in another fight with his playmate. I was thinking of ceratopsians. I thought of three of them, and I thought, both of the robots should have headpieces of their own that look like how you saw them. It was pretty exciting. I was excited from seeing it after it was finished. It makes them look cooler."
"Okay."
"Now, Bernard can fly on four legs, but he can even fly on two legs. Same for his playmate, the other dinosaur (I didn't really name him), but he's also programmed to stand on two legs and has arms built inside him. Me, my wife, and most of my kids use the dinosaur that has a short-eared owl coloring dinosaur, for bull riding, we even learned what to do, how to be bull riders from books, even though none of us ever entered into a bull riding contest. Now, when it comes to Bernard being powered off, if someone touches him while he's off, he'll turn on immediately, and unless he can recognize the person quickly as me or one of my family members, or someone as not being a thief or willing to do harm, he'll resort to defending himself. As for Marco, though. He's programmed to electrocute anyone who's not me, Bernard, or any of my family members, or parents-in-laws, who touches him when he's turned off, no matter how they touch him. I should reprogram him to have that removed though, and for now, I already have a warning label concerning that ready. I'll put it on him later. I'll also reprogram him to not electrocute Lincoln, Lily, or Dad. Some more things I should say, Milo is addicted to honey, Esther and Kira love yams, emperor penguins are Esther's favorite animal, Rico enjoys medieval stories and theming, not just in public places, but in books, and Regina, as well as all of my children and me, know how to climb trees, Esther practices andtries out a lot of different cultures from so many countries, and Bernard has emotions as part of his memory chip. Same for Marco. And another thing, me and my family used to be fans of Disney, but we started becoming unsettled when the Walt Disney Company bought Marvel Comics in 2009, and we were thinking 'is this a good idea', then in 2012, we heard that it bought Lucasfilm (even though we don't watch Star Wars), but we were starting to feel contempt for Disney, then came March 20, 2019, Disney ultimately bought most of 21st Century Fox. From that point on, we mostly cut off Disney from our lives. The only Disney content we see nowadays are Fox movies, that were made and came out, exactly, before March 20, 2019. Before then, we took a look at the acquisitions of Disney made, and we didn't feel any good about it. But, we don't attack anyone who still likes Disney in spite of the acquisitions. And our opinion of Disney wasn't accepted for almost two months. On a side note, I did read comments on how this would lead to a number of employees being laid off from Fox. That's terrible. I know it's part of the business world for one company to buy another, but for this type of thing to happen, absolutely no matter what company, is just unnecessary. I just hate that idea."
Lincoln was making lines with a marker across a map of the United States of America. On his dresser was a list that said "Families with the last name, Archer." He drew the lines next to a piece of paper that said "The ACAO." After lunch, he read some news stories that were posted, that yesterday, during the time he was living in the Catscratch universe, 3 families with the last name, Archer, in Colorado, California, and Maryland, were slain by unknown people. The memory of hearing the story about Martin Thomson and the ACAO when he and everyone else time traveled to the future was still fresh in his mind. Ever since he got back, he's been hearing and watching news stories, concerning families with the last name, Archer, being killed. It was connected too well, not just in the United States, but also in other parts of the world. The ACAO had to be behind this. It was obvious. There's no way anyone could, nor should just deny this. He knew that ACAO was the perpetrator. He knew it in his heart. The thing was, from what the news story was saying, there was absolutely no evidence left behind of who they were, and rare recorded evidence in one of the three states only showed the murderers in random casual clothing, The ACAO is really good at trying to cover their tracks, to most of the world. The photo of him and his sisters (most of them no longer his sisters), was no longer on his dresser, it was put in the box with the other things he put in there. He put everything related to his consipracy theorizing in the dresser, and got out a prehistory book, this one was related to the Cenozoic era.
*Cut to Rita Loud.*
"You say my brother, Caleb is being interviewed? In California?"
"Absolutely. With his family too." The interviewer said. "Do you love him?"
"Yes, I love him. He was such a loving brother when were growing up. Nowadays, we talk to each other, a lot on the phone. I just wish often he wouldn't talk to me without criticizing me!" She shouted. She took deep breaths and became calm. "Sorry. I had another mood swing. Getting back to the subject, it's not like, Caleb was wrong in retrospect, when it counted. There were times I didn't use better judgment. I wish he would respect my husband more. Lynn may not be the man that Caleb his in his own right, but he's still a nice man. If only there would ever be a day. But that's just wishful thinking. But what does Caleb know, when he criticizes me and Lynn?! He didn't ever visit us a lot!" She became calm again. She covered her head. "Ow! I'm sorry. I had another mood swing. And I had a headache. What I said was uncalled for. We didn't visit him and his family a lot either. The worst part is, none of our families ever call each other. That's shameful for all of us. *Sigh* At least Caleb keeps in touch with Dad a lot. *Sniffle* I wish I had done better a lot sooner, not just as a parent, but as a sibling, when it comes to, contacting my relatives." A tear went down Rita's face. "At least Dad still loves both of us equally. *sniffle* I bonded really great with Amanda before Caleb and her moved away. I've been told she still thinks positively. Well, that's good to know. If only, I was more deserving of it." She covered her forehead again. "Oh. Who would've thought that the Regulars do a better job in their own right at handling their kids, and their kids are not quite as-problematic as ours? I was told before none of them were bratty, compared to Lola. I always missed Caleb and Amanda."
"Mhm."
"Wouldn't it be great for our families to always spend time with each other? Playing, socializing, eating together? Hmm. I'm sure Lincoln would have fun with them." Rita spoke calmly. She shook her head. "I must prove to my big brother I can be a better parent. He was already impressed. I can do it. I can do it. I can do better. And well, at least Amanda still thinks positively of me. I must be a better mother too. I must help Lynn do better as a father too. He has only one son. So far. If we do good, we can show Caleb Regular we're not so bad as he thinks. I'm willing to get to know a lot about all of my children. But what if we don't do good?"
*Cut to Lisa Loud.*
"When it comes to our family, me and my siblings meddle in our brother's business when it counts. I can be snarky at times, I can be helpful, however, you know what with my intelligence. I was surprised when me and everyone learned that the multiverse exists. I mainly focus on doing experiments, as one thing for example. Although, I'm not to be underestimated elsewhere when it counts. I did act pretty excited at the idea of Lincoln being bullied by a girl, of course, I thought at the time, that this girl did like Lincoln. That was rather too crazy, but in retrospect, in that exact case, it's not like we were so wrong, me and the other girls during that moment. I also engage with my siblings in discussing secrets, but that's all I'll say in terms of that. I can also have fun in things like snow, and being in a swimming pool. When it comes to Lincoln & I, I enjoy those peanut butter and jelly sandwiches that he makes. They are delicious. He used to feed me milk too when I was a baby. He's that considerate, when it came to those two things. However, he doesn't like it when I do experiments that one would find questionable, I understand, like for example, I took his appendix."
"Uuuuum."
"When it comes to my other siblings, I'll say five examples. I can be annoyed by Leni's ignorance, she's not the smartest of us, I tutor Lynn for her exams to let her stay in her sports teams, Luan and I, one time I tried to get rid of a pimple that she had, I complimented Lucy for fake blood she made, but I told her she needed a little bit of an improvement, and Lily and I, we played with a chocolate fountain at a party one of our siblings made. When it comes down to it, in the grand scheme of things. I made an analysis some past weeks ago, and I realized, we really don't know, a lot about each other. I continued that analysis, and I could see we are dysfunctional." She cleared her throat. "I'm changing the subject, if that's okay. with you."
"Yeah, that's okay."
"All right, then. I received a letter from the university previously. I'll be right back." She got off from her bed, left where the camera was focused, she came back in a minute, and looked at the letter.
"Now, it says here that among the things that affected Lincoln from those chemicals he fell into, another thing that he can do with his shapeshifting power, it can absorb his clothes, footwear, and things like capes, to take the form of his body. And his form has white fur, with other colors like 2 different types of red, and black and blue, because of the hair on his head, and the things he was wearing. That's why his Smilodon form looks like how it does, unlike how the big cat actually would look."
"Got it."
"Here are some more things, the study reveals that he's gotten a more enhanced sense of smell and hearing, along with night vision. Can you believe that?"
"That's interesting."
"He needs to learn how to control his animalistic behavior, if he's going to be seen positively by the public. I worry about when the day the opposite will happen, will come." She sported a worried look. "Now, as it is, I spotted him a few times eating something as he's going into his room. I have a good feeling that he's stress eating. But what is he stressed from? I don't know for sure yet. Now, I can be talented in break-dancing, and I also have a thing for rapping. Of course, I focus on science-related work, mainly. But, I am a girl who can have fun in something, you rest assured. In terms of things that I make, I once made lie-detecting cameras, of course, they ultimately proved to be impractical and unnecessary. I also mixed oreo cookies with the bioluminescent DNA of the Aequorea victoria jellyfish that when consumed by the user, will make their body glow for a short time. Why was it a short period of time? It was a prototype. Another example of something I made, I made shoes that can help you walk on the ceiling. I could go on forever. But I'll stop right here. Now, not everything I make will please my family members or convenience them, depending on what it is. Another thing about me, I have an addiction to chocolate, all of my sisters. I wasn't very good at forming friendships at first, but after a while, I became friends with someone in my kindergarten class, Darcy. She's such a nice girl. You know, I can find her someone I can go to for comfort and support in this situation. I should get some positive mental occupation with her help. We can play board games together, for instance."
*Cut to Lincoln in his room*
Lincoln Loud was sitting on his bed, his book was open and placed next to his pillow. He was eating a pop tart. He wasn't feeling relaxed. Then, someone knocked on his door.
He swallowed. "Come in." Soon, Leni came in.
"Hiya, Linky." She waved, and smiled awkwardly. She could see what he was holding. "Uh, what are you doing? What's with the pop tart?"
"I'm stress eating, Leni."
"Stress eating, huh? Wow. I didn't know people can stress eat."
"Well, they do. What is it?"
"I thought we should talk to each other, but now-I just remembered, I didn't have anything to talk to you about."
Lincoln huffed in annoyance, as he closed his eyes.
"Lincoln, you should give me that pop tart."
"Why?"
"I don't think it's healthy for you to have pop tarts when you're stress eating. Or anything with carbohydrates. I don't want you to get as fat as a walrus."
"Leni, I don't feel like doing this. I need to relax myself. Thanks, but no thank you."
"Lincoln, please give me the pop tart." Leni motioned with her hand.
"No." The boy replied, a little bit seriously. He stared at her, his face had one third of defiance.
Leni was starting to become a little bit serious now. "Lincoln, I'm not leaving until you give me that pop tart."
The two Louds stared at each other seriously. Lincoln was thinking in his mind that he should growl or snarl at her, to get her to leave. But another part of him didn't feel it would be right, to do it to Leni, and he especially couldn't risk him turning into a big cat and bringing harm to her, or even kill her and anyone else who was unfortunate enough to come into his path. He sighed reluctantly, walked over and gave it to Leni.
"Thanks, Lincoln." She gave him a soft smile, but he only stared seriously at her. She turned around, changing her expression to a sad one, but looked away from him as she closed the door. Lincoln thought to himself. He had to give Leni some credit. She wasn't as smart as him or even Lisa, but she was standing her ground against him. By herself. Even though she knew that he had a shapeshifting power part of him. The power to transform into a prehistoric big cat, with the power to severely harm her. She was either brave-or stupid, or stupidly brave.
*Cut to Lucy.*
"How do you feel around your family, as a person?" The interviewer asked.
"I don't feel that I had fit in well with them as a person. They had their own respective interests. I didn't really have interest for things like golf, comedy, pageantry, or even science, for example. However, I did have want to go to the beach one time when Lincoln wanted to go somewhere, of course I would write poems about shark attacks."
"Okay." The interviewer was nervous in saying that.
"Another thing, I did go with Lincoln one time when went to a zombie themed escape room. Otherwise, most of the time, I tend to separate from myself from my siblings to be somewhere quiet. However, I do join my siblings when we're watching the show, Dream Boat. Even though, I separate myself from my siblings, I don't like it when I don't get noticed."
*Cut to Lori Loud.*
The interviewer asked "So, how long have you known your cousins, the Regulars? Do you know much about them?"
Lori was left speechless, she could only hang her jaw openly for 2 minutes. "I'm afraid that-we don't really know our cousins. None of us ever called them. Only Mom. We don't remember them very well. I don't think they remember that I have a boyfriend. At least, when I had a boyfriend, before he broke up with me."
"Okay."
Lorio sniffled and shed a single tear, before wiping it off. "I can't believe I've been so selfish. I didn't bother putting effort, for even just one day, to get to know one of my cousins. And I only saw them, at two funerals." She was starting to cry a little bit. "W-w-what kind of person am I?" She wiped her tears. "No. We didn't ever visit each other. It's not like we were financially prepared, but still." She made her mouth into an o, and her eyes shrank. "Except-we always had our annual family vacation at a resort. We could've earned more money to make visits to the Regulars. Or we could've made trips to certain locations go back and forth, year by year." She sighed and facepalmed in frustration. "How could we be so stupid? Most of us are smart in our own rights, and yet, we don't stop for a moment and think considerably about seeing our relatives. Not even Lisa, and she's a child prodigy. She knows how to make inventions. Or even Lincoln. And he calls himself the man with a plan. Agh. What's wrong with us?"
*Cut to Lincoln.*
"I'm not going to dress it up. We've been so focused on our lives and each other, that we didn't focus a lot on the Regulars, or even me. *Sigh* I can be nice and supportive towards others, but none of us ever decided to be in touch with any of our cousins. Not even me. I'm not proud of myself for that. For a long time, I didn't know if any of our cousins had any positive or negative opinions. I didn't know virtually anything about them, except where they live and that they live on a farm. Shame on me." Lincoln looked down to the floor. "I'm a bad cousin. Not once, not once have any of me and the girls ever called our relatives. Nor did we ask to join on phone calls with my uncle. Only Mom called my uncle. What was his name? Carl, Carter, Calvin. C-Caleb, That's it." Lincoln said as he snapped his fingers. "*Sigh*. How come Pop-Pop didn't ever tell us about this? How come he didn't correct us on this? He'd probably be disappointed in me. In us. No. Not probably. Most likely. I wish we could go back in time. Make sure we'd have our past selves resolve to at least visit the Regulars every two years."
"Do you know that your cousin, Kira, looks up to you?"
"Really?" Lincoln looked up. "My cousin, Kira looks up to me?"
"Indeed. I learned it from the interviewer in California. For example, she believes you deserve better in life, even though she knows you're not a saint. And she said that at least you're mature and you take responsibility when it counts."
"Wow. That's actually nice, and rather sweet."
*Cut to Lynn Loud Sr.*
"I didn't keep in touch with the Regulars. No, not really, no. I have Caleb and Amanda's numbers, but I was too occupied with life. Still, I should've called. Although, it's not like Caleb had nice things to say about me, most of the time, he wasn't subtle about his opinion about me ever since we first me. I was a coward, I didn't act like a man, I wasn't tough, yada, yada, yada. I didn't bother to make enough changes. I'm not like him." He said the last statement in self-deprecation. "He's probably close to all of his children. Me. I'm not close to completely all of mine. At least Albert liked me for a long time. I'm definitely not so close to Lincoln. And I definitely wasn't a good enough father to him, when it counted."
"How do you feel about your relationship with Lincoln in retrospect?"
"I feel terrible. And to make matters worse, he's disowned me as a dad. Could I hardly blame him? Hmm. I need to do better. I want to do better. And I hope he'll see that at least I'm not such a bad dad, if not a great one. Sometimes, I hoped that Caleb and I would ever become friends." The Loud patriarch felt a spark in him. "I want to bond with Caleb, when the time comes, and I hope it'll plant the seeds of friendship between us." He said in determination.
It was an orange afternoon in California.
Kira and Regina Regular were riding on horseback together, with Regina wrapping her arms around Kira's waist. Kira's voice spoke in the background. "I grew up on this place. I didn't ever want to move away from this place. Regina and I had a lot of fun with each other for all the years in our lives together. We had fun at work, we had fun when we spent time with each other, we'd have fun with each other on the beach. Dad would surf there every chance we had, when we could go to the beach. He taught me and some of my siblings too. Sometimes, Regina would call me 'Kiara', simply just because she wanted to. She looks up to me the most out of all of her siblings in terms of that." The girls rode across the area they were in. They looked around for 10 minutes, taking in the sight around them. It was quite fun for them to go riding around on horseback across land. They looked across them, a view of more land ahead of them. They smiled at the sight. They took a look to their right, and they gasped. 20 feet away from them, was a male Siberian tiger, staring at them. Kira made the horse turn around, keeping her eyes on the feline, as she made it slowly walk away, her sister worriedly kept her grasp tightly around her, as she closed her eyes. The tiger turned its head, started to walk, then ran away, and with that, Kira kicked at the horse's sides, making it run to take them to safety. Marco walks across a hallway in the house, with Regina hanging around him from the front.
*Cut to Kira sitting somewhere in the front of the house, on the porch.*
"I loved living here. It was a place, that I could have some wonderful, great, and sweet memories. It was the best place where I fit in with my family. It mixed great with me and one of my talents. We would do things away from the farm, like going to a theme park, the zoo, the aquarium, variable beaches, walking up the mountain. I'd even visit friends of mine, snd vice versa. We had so much fun with each other. All my siblings had fun with their friends. We're all going to miss them. At least most of us have their phone numbers. And I wrote down the phone numbers to the parents of Regina's friends. I'll be praying that me and my family will adjust well in Michigan. I'll be praying that Lincoln will live a positive future life. May Christ always be with him."
*Cut to Lincoln Loud sitting on the roof of the house.* Lincoln wrapped his arms around his legs, as he looked solemnly into the Lincoln's voice spoke in the background.
"I lived here for all of my life. I didn't stand up for myself enough. I'm cleaning up my act. I'm done making plans of my own. They're pointless. They don't succeed, virtually every time. I won't be pushed around anymore. I need to see that my family has changed for the better. I'm not their son for now. I need to show people in my school life I'm not to be messed with either. It's time for new beginnings to come. For now, I'll keep living in the Loud house."
A/N: Lincoln Loud is my favorite Loud House character, and my only favorite Loud child. And he always will be both. No matter how many times I fail at that, before making him my favorites again. Nobody flame me for that. Now, I have not seen Schooled on TV or a watchable cartoon website at all, I haven't read the plot on the Loud House wiki, and I will do neither of them at all. Like I said, in chapter 2 of my first Loud House story, one of the only Loud house episodes I want to see are Lincoln-centered episodes that have him portrayed positively, or at least mostly positively. I do not like that he's getting wasted, like a vegetable, in my opinion. Of course, I did see Resident Upheaval on my phone, and he got into conflict with Clyde as the episode went on. I give credit to That Engineer for the parents forcing the bat out (if he did use that). Here's a modification to what I said in chapter 2 for my version of the Loud House movie. I will also watch Lincoln-centered episodes, as long as he's one of the main protagonists. Now, before I joined Fanfiction, I used the Regular family in a fanfiction of mine that wasn't meant to be published online (and it was unfinished), and they weren't meant to be the Loud's relatives at first when I was typing it, and it wasn't easy coming up for the names of most of the Regulars as I worked on this chapter. Marco is not inspired by Robbie from new roomie. And don't expect me to make a therapy session sequence that focuses on all of the Louds, I wouldn't be as good at it as two particular authors. Believe it or not, Caleb Regular's hairstyle isn't meant to look like Josh Singleton's hairstyle from Close Enough. On a side note, Josh and Emily would make better parents for Lincoln and Lily, in my opinion. I don't know if I can be able to finish this story. We're still living in less than joyous times, and who knows when this world will end (nobody please mention any bad events in this year). I was unable to go to the San Diego Zoo Safari Park this month. Be prepared to see me use the silence is golden trope and a variant of the reset button trope when it counts.
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