Chapter Twenty-Five
I awaken in painful increments to the sounds of perpetual screams, blaster fire and blaring sirens. They don't immediately register on my consciousness though. I'm vaguely aware that something is happening, but that's not the thing that commands my attention. I'm too preoccupied with registering another reality altogether.
Though I am in incredible pain, amazingly enough, I am not dead. I process that fact with a sense of genuine bewilderment. How am I not dead? I should be dead. I expected to be dead. And, if I awakened at all, I thought I would be transferred to some spectral plain within the Force itself. But instead, I'm sprawled across the Supreme Chancellor's floor feeling as if I've been trampled by a herd of shaaks.
The realization leaves me stunned. I have never anticipated that outcome at all. For days I've been mentally preparing myself for the inevitability of death or destruction, ever since that infernal dream and my fruitless conversation with Master Yoda. I wrestled with the implications. But, once I had moved past my rage and grief over the seeming futility of it all, I had come to a strange place of peace and understanding. I was ready to die.
But clearly the Force had other ideas and apparently, Death had not been factored into the plan. Unfortunately, I hadn't done much to prepare for that outcome and the consequences that would come with my being alive. Namely that I had just executed the Supreme Chancellor of the Galactic Republic in his office. It stands to reason that there will be some fallout from that. And if the melee unfolding outside that is increasingly commanding my attention serves as any indication, I'm going to have to deal with that fallout sooner rather than later.
And with that thought comes the first real perception of everything going on around me. There is a red light flashing beyond the panoramic window behind the chancellor's desk, bathing the room in intermittent swaths of crimson. I'm surrounded by broken pieces of durasteel, glass and mangled furniture. My head is pounding and every muscle in my body feels as if it has been gripped in one continuous spasm. Even blinking feels like agony.
I suppose a headache and body pain can be expected after having multiple currents of high voltage electricity pumped into one's body by an evil lunatic. It's quite miraculous that my heart is still beating. Then again if Sidious, or the Force for that matter, had truly wanted me dead then I suppose I would be.
It takes a few seconds to coax myself into movement. The first thing I do is call my lightsaber back to my side. It had rolled from my grip after I had fallen into what I presumed would be death. Once I have it secured in my hand once more, I gradually push myself upright and quickly regret it. The room seems to dip and swell around me. I fight the impulse to lie back down to make it stop. Nausea sweeps through me is like a raging fire. I clench my teeth against the urge to vomit as bile rises hot and acrid in the back of my throat.
Once I am sure I won't be sick, I finally survey the full damage that has been inflicted on the supreme chancellor's grand office. It is an absolute disaster. I'm extremely lucky Sidious decided to dismiss his guard detail for the sake of preserving his anonymity otherwise they might have rushed inside to investigate long before I had the opportunity to finish him off.
There isn't a single surface in the room that hasn't sustained some degree of damage. Broken light panels hang precariously from the wall, cracked pillars bow dangerously. The room is littered with the remnants of pulverized sculptures and decorative ornaments. There are whole pieces of furniture that have been completely carved in half. Even the polished floor is blackened in several spots from Sidious' repeated lightning strikes.
But the most severe damage had been inflicted on Sidious himself. His body lay crumpled a few feet away from me, sprawled at an unnatural angle, obviously dead. I realize rather sardonically that he is the third person that I've killed in less than a day. It's no wonder I'm exhausted.
I would gladly collapse back onto the floor and stay there for the next 1000 years if it were not for the sirens and shouts interspersed with what sounds like warfare that keeps niggling at me. I can't figure out why I should be hearing it at all. Granted my confrontation with Sidious was no small thing, but I imagine if the sirens, screams, and blaster fire were related to that, someone would have arrived to arrest me by now. And since that hasn't happened, there must be something else going on…
Though it takes tremendous effort, I push to my feet finally and stagger over to the window. What I see stuns me into immobility. The sun is just beginning to come up over the horizon, bathing everything below in a dusky light. But even in that hazy orange glow it is easy to discern what is happening.
The Jedi Temple is on fire. Smoke billows up from its towering steeples in thick, black plumes. As I scan the area, I quickly become aware of the reason for that when I see the battalion of marching clone troopers. Among the firing soldiers I am also able to make out the darting figures of Jedi knights and padawans as they valiantly defend their home against attack.
As understanding dawns, I spin to face Sidious where he lays almost face first against the floor and notice the comm device laying only a few centimeters from his open hand. "You vindictive, old bastard," I mutter to the dead man, "You just had to inflict as much damage as you could, didn't you?" With his dying breath, Darth Sidious had executed his final revenge…Order 66.
I'm not given a second to let his death throe actions sink in. An instant later, half a dozen red guards burst in the room and announce their intention to take me into custody. I'm not in the physical condition, mood, or mindset for another fierce battle, but I know that if I'm going to get out of there, I'm going to have to fight my way out. And so, I ignite my lightsaber and get on with it.
They come at me in an endless barrage, red guard, clone trooper. It doesn't matter. I cut a direct path through them, Force pushing my way through falling bodies towards the main hanger of the Senate building. When I finally burst outside and go running for my ship, R2 is fairly levitating in his agitation, tooting at me wildly about the attack on the Temple.
By now, the sounds of battle are deafening and echoing in my ears. Part of me is strongly inclined to join the battle, to choose the right side this time and fight for the place, the people who had been my family for much of my life. The other part of me is consumed with worry for Padmé.
I've tried to raise her on comm several times already without response. If Sidious was vengeful enough to let Order 66 be his final sendoff for the Jedi, could he have possibly planned something equally nefarious for me? Clearly, he hadn't been beyond threatening the people I cared about with harm. I have no doubt that he had some sort of contingency plan in place for doing so as well.
I stand there in wild indecision for a moment, torn between heading for the Temple or going straight to Padmé's apartment. Once again, every crossroad in my life reduces down to a choice between duty and desire. Finally, I stop thinking about it and simply hop into the ship, driven towards my destination on pure instinct alone. I'm surprised by where I end up.
The Temple courtyard is covered with the slain remains of fallen clone troopers. Lightsabers arc and swing gracefully, wielded by knight and padawan alike, in the growing sunlight amid the steady barrage of blaster fire. As I glide above the smoking spires of the Jedi Temple in search of a place to land, I can faintly make out a small, leaping green figure on the ground, clipping its way briskly through the mass of clone troopers that converge in the Temple courtyard. A thankful sigh escapes my lungs when I recognize who it is.
Master Yoda.
He wasn't there the first time when I sieged the Temple and killed everyone inside, but he is down there with them now. The realization serves to quiet much of my churning anxiety and guilt. I'm comforted by that knowledge that he is fighting alongside them, confident that the Jedi will be able to hold their own against the clone troopers with the grandmaster there…and without Darth Vader for them to contend with this time around. Relieved at least on that front, I turn the ship towards the senate complex and head directly for Padmé's apartment.
Captain Typho and Dormé run out to greet me the instant I dock at the side of the balcony. Seeing them without Padmé instantly alarms me and I'm thrown into a panic. "Where is Padmé?" I demand, stalking towards them angrily, "Is she here? Is she alright?"
"Anakin!"
I glance up sharply at the sound of my name and there she is. I'm running from the balcony and towards her without a second thought. She's in my arms an instant later, slamming against my chest and gripping me in a tight, desperate embrace. I hold her just as tightly. In that moment, she feels like the only thing in the world keeping me anchored in place. We cling to each other for a long time, trembling violently as we both try to absorb the sheer magnitude of everything has happened.
"Anakin, do you know what's going on?" she bursts out, rearing back in my arms to scan my face with frightened eyes, "Something terrible must have happened, but we haven't received any official reports! The Jedi Temple is under attack! We could see the smoke from here!"
"I know. The clone troopers are attacking."
Captain Typho balks at the news. "Attacking the Jedi? But…but why? What's happened?"
"The Chancellor has declared the Jedi enemies of the Republic."
Now it is Dormé's turn to gasp in disbelief. "I don't understand! That's madness! The Jedi fight for the Republic! Why would he declare them enemies?"
Only Padmé accepts the news with a degree of calm and only because she is only person who knows, outside of the Jedi Order, that what is currently happening had ever been a possibility at all. "So, it's begun then?" she determines in a tremulous voice, "The Jedi Purge is happening…"
"Yes," I confirm grimly, "I don't know how bad it will be…how many clones the Jedi were able to deactivate before the order but…that doesn't matter now. It's done and we can't stay here, Padmé. We need to leave this place immediately!"
"Are you in danger? You're not a Jedi anymore but… Will the troopers come for you as well?"
"I don't know. I'm not sure what contingency plans Sidious might have had in place for me."
"Anakin, I'm frightened."
"We'll be fine," I reassure her with a steady calm I don't necessarily feel, "But we need to get off this planet." I throw a glance over my shoulder at Typho. "Can you procure a ship for us? The faster you can get one, the better!" I address Dormé next. "Pack a bag for Padmé. Nothing too elaborate. We need to travel light and fast." They both glance at Padmé simultaneously after I'm done barking commands and, once they've received a confirming nod from her regarding my terse instructions, they both rush off to do as I've asked.
Once we're alone, Padmé regards me with dark eyes filled with dread. "Anakin…" she begins slowly, fearfully, "What aren't you telling me? Why did you leave last night? Where did you go?"
I drop my gaze, too gutless to see her reaction when I reveal the truth. "The Chancellor is dead, Padmé. It's over."
She emits a small yelp of dismay and slowly backs from my slackened embrace, her expression stricken. "Oh, Anakin…" she utters, "What did you do?"
"He didn't leave me a choice!"
"Is that where you went last night?" she cries in disbelief, "I woke up and you were gone. I comm'd you again and again, but you wouldn't answer me."
"I know…" I acknowledge guiltily, "I'm sorry. I knew you would try to dissuade me."
"Did you go only to confront him or…or was it to…to…?"
"To kill him?" I finish for her quietly, "Yes. I went there to kill him, Padmé."
"So, you snuck away in the middle of the night so that you could murder the Supreme Chancellor of the Galactic Republic?"
"Don't make it sound like I did something reprehensible! You know he was no mere politician!"
"It doesn't matter! That wasn't the way, Anakin! You know it wasn't!"
"I always told you that I would have to face him, Padmé! I had no choice!"
"There is always a choice! We agreed! You promised me!"
"Did you honestly think he was going to step down if we asked him nicely?" I snap impatiently, "Don't be naive! You were never going to oust him by legal means! He had control of everything!"
She flinches at the retort before lifting her chin haughtily, her demeanor cool. "When did you decide to do it? Was it after I lost the vote?"
"Yes. It was then."
Her scornful expression collapses into an anguished grimace. "You let me think you had accepted it. You made love to me that night and the next one when you knew the whole time that you were going to…" She trails off into silence, her features slackening with sudden realization. "You didn't think you were going to come back, did you?"
I shake my head. "No."
The sob that follows my admission is suddenly drowned out by a mechanized announcement being transmitted from outside. Attention all citizens. The city is under mandatory lockdown. Please remain in your homes. Violators will be shot on sight. Please be advised. The warning repeats on a loop, echoing through the apartment ominously until it finally fades away entirely. Panicked, Padmé reflexively grabs my arm and pulls me deeper into the apartment to shield me from view. I bite out a blistering curse under my breath as I recognize that our options for escape are becoming more and more limited with each elapsing second.
"How are we supposed to make it to the ship?" Padmé frets, "You heard the announcement! We can't leave or we'll be executed on sight!"
"We're going to have to risk it," I tell her, "Staying here isn't an option. It's only a matter of time before they come looking for me!"
"They?" Padmé echoes woodenly.
"I'll very likely be arrested for the Chancellor's death."
"Did you really expect a different outcome?" she cries in disbelief, "Honestly, Anakin! Do you ever stop and think?"
"I guess not!"
"What did you imagine was going to happen? You were going to kill him and then everything would go back to the way it was before the war?"
"I don't know what I expected!" I retort gruffly, "I couldn't see anything past destroying him, Padmé! And it's not like I was anticipating that I would even be alive after this! Forgive me for not planning better!" I note the way she regards me now, her eyes brimming with hurt and disapproval and my gut twists painfully in reaction. I'm saddened that I've fallen short of her expectations yet again, but I can't regret my actions, not even in the face of her disappointment. "Do you want me to go?"
"You heard the announcement. You'll be killed on sight if you leave."
"That's not the point, Padmé," I sigh wearily, "If you want to wash your hands of me now, just say so."
"That's always the most expedient solution for you, isn't it, Anakin?"
"I'm trying to give you an out. I won't hold it against you."
She scoffs indignantly. "Well, unfortunately, I don't seem to have the same ease as you do when it comes to walking away from the people I love."
This is hardly the time to have a long, existential debate about my inability to communicate with her properly or the precarious state of our romance, especially after the hellish night I've endured, and I want to tell her that. I want to shut down this ridiculous, circular argument before it begins because she's not going to see my side of things and I can't understand hers. But, at the same time, she's feeling rightfully emotional after everything I've put her through. I know that if I dismiss her now, that will likely push her over the edge completely and, possibly, do irreparable harm to our relationship…if it hasn't been damaged beyond repair already. And so, I force myself to set aside my more pressing concerns so that I can properly address hers.
"You really think that walking away from you is easy for me?"
She lifts her slim shoulders in a careless shrug. "It must be. You do it over and over again, even when you think you'll never see me again."
"All I want is for you to be safe and happy, Padmé. That's why I do everything I do." There is some irony in knowing that the problem in my first life was my inability to let her go. And in this life, it seems to be my absolute willingness to do the exact opposite. No matter what choice I make, it will always be the wrong one. "I don't want you to compromise your principles to be with me."
"Then why do you insist on putting me in positions where I have to?"
"What do you want me to say to that?"
"I don't know that there's anything you can say, Anakin."
"How can I fix this?" I ask her miserably, "Tell me. I'll do whatever you ask."
"You can't fix it. It's too late for that. We need to figure out what happens next."
I doubt that we're going to come to a resolution about any of this, and it fails to matter right then because Dormé suddenly emerges from the bedroom carrying the single bag I had instructed her to pack. Once glance at her disturbed expression though tells me that she has been privy to my entire conversation with Padmé. I'm not sure what she thinks of me, but she is clearly reeling from the news I've delivered, just as much as her mistress.
"Is the plan still to leave?" she asks softly, "Or are we doing something different now?"
I glance over at Padmé. "That's up to you. If you want me to go, then I will."
"So, now I get a say in what happens?" she bites back an instant before her acrimony escapes her in a tired sigh, "We should stay together. I don't want you to be on your own." My shock over her response must be plainly evident right then because she snaps almost resentfully, "Did you really expect anything else of me, Anakin? I love you! I don't want you to be arrested."
"I know a way that we can get to the landing strip undetected," Dormé assures us.
"Good," I reply, "We should leave now. Grab R2 and let's get out of here. I'm sure the streets will be crawling with troopers before too long."
Padmé snags hold of my sleeve when I start after Dormé, nibbling her lip in uncertainty. "Even if we manage to get to the ship, how do you propose to fly us out of here?" she asks, "They're not going to just allow us to leave the planet…not with everything going on."
"Don't worry about it," I declare with a confidence that is more swagger than conviction, "Just leave that part to me."
