Disclaimer: The characters and locations do not belong to me, but to ABC. Thanks for the wonderful template!

Trigger warnings: psychological problems (panic attacks, anxiety disorders, depression, suicide themes), detailed descriptions of medical procedures

Setting: The story is set roughly in Season 5, chronologically, but without Dark Swan, Camelot, or the Underworld. Regina and Robin have never been together. Henry is 15 years old and Regina and Emma have been a couple for a year. Together, the small family inhabits Regina's mansion.

A/N: Dear readers,

Here it is now, the largest and most comprehensive work I have ever written. I will post a weekly update every Sunday (if I can manage it). As a little foretaste, you'll get the short prologue today and then I'll start tomorrow with the first chapter, which will be longer.

I hope you enjoy reading, would recommend you to put a tissue box within reach, and welcome feedback of any kind!

Please bear with me as my native language is not English.

Kind regards Suni


Prologue

some months in the future...

While standing in front of the mirror and looking at his reflection in it, Henry tilted his head slightly. He had the feeling that he didn't recognize himself, which wasn't because of the neat black suit he was wearing or the tie he had tied completely askew, although neither was his usual outfit. Nor had he grown much since his 15th birthday or worn his hair differently.

But there was something in his look, his eyes, and his features. He seemed edgier, tougher, and as if nothing and no one could touch him. Yet the exact opposite was true. The last few months had passed him by like a bad nightmare that had become real, at the same time seemingly frantically fast and creeping slowly.

Once again, he turned back and forth in front of the man-sized mirror and repeatedly flattened his slightly tousled brown hair, which simply could not be tamed that day, no matter how hard he tried.

A quick knock on his door made him look up and turn away from the mirror. "Yes?"

Regina stuck her head in the door and gave her son a pained smile. "Are you ready?" she wanted to know in a warm voice.

"I don't know... Can you maybe help me with the tie?" he asked.

Nodding, Regina entered. She wore a tight-fitting black dress with thin straps that flattered her slender figure, and her dark hair just touched her bare shoulders. "Of course I can help you, Henry. Come here."

Henry turned to her fully and opened up his jacket before watching his mother's deft fingers tie a perfect tie knot. "Not so tight, please," came quickly from him as she tightened it.

"Like this?"

Now it was Henry's turn to nod before he fastened the buttons of his jacket again and turned to the mirror once more. "Thanks, Mom."

Regina stepped behind him with a smile and wrapped her arms around his middle. He had grown so tall by now that she just managed to see her own reflection over his shoulder. "You're welcome." She met his gaze in the mirror and took a deep breath. "Are you ready?"

"Can you ever be ready for this?" Henry wanted to know, swallowing hard.

"No, probably not," Regina admitted, sighing before running a hand through her hair and taking a seat on Henry's bed. Carefully, she stroked the empty space beside her. "We still have a few minutes."

Relieved, Henry willingly settled down beside her and intertwined his fingers with hers. He stared at her hands for a while before raising his eyes to Regina's face. "Mom?"

"Huh?" Torn from her thoughts, Regina also lifted her gaze and met her son's.

"Are you really okay? I mean...are you going to be okay?"

Regina forced herself to smile wryly and stroked her son's hair. "I have to be," she countered, "What about you?"

He nodded. "I'm fine." Again, they were both silent for a while before Henry looked at her again. "Do you ever wonder if things could have been different? Whether we made mistakes without which all this could have been avoided?"

Regina snorted. "I don't think about anything else. It's in my head all the time. I fall asleep with it and wake up with it," she answered him truthfully, squeezing his fingers. "But it will get better. And, Henry: you didn't do anything wrong at all. Please stop telling yourself that, all right?"

"Neither did you, Mom," he replied.

Regina took a deep breath. "I don't know."

"But I do know," Henry's immediate response came. "I wish you could see it, too."

"Someday, maybe," came a soft smile from her before she pressed a kiss to his forehead. A glance at her wristwatch told her they had to get going. "It's time."

Henry nodded and got up from the bed before offering his mother a hand to help her to her feet since she was already wearing her high heels that matched her dress. "Are we meeting Grandma and Grandpa there then?"

"Yeah, they're coming in the pickup."

"And Neal?"

"Stays with Zelena and Robin." She couldn't help a quick smile. "Don't worry, it's all organized."

"I know." Henry sighed and climbed down the stairs and then outside into the Mercedes.

After Regina put on a thin jacket, she followed him out, slid behind the wheel, and looked at Henry in the passenger seat. "But?"

"I'm nervous... It's just... The last time we did this, we buried my dad," he admitted quietly, looking down at his hands knotted in his lap. "I was hoping I wouldn't have to go to another funeral right away, that's all."

Tears came to Regina's eyes and she wiped her hand over them once briefly to hold them back. "I can understand that. After all, I told you that you didn't have to go."

"Yes, I do," he replied, looking his mother in the eye. "At least we owe her that, don't you think?"

"By all means, we are. But she'd understand if you couldn't handle it, I just know it," she nodded, stroking his cheek.

"I want to go with you," Henry repeated, directing his gaze through the windshield out onto the road.

"As you like," Regina agreed, tightening her shoulders and starting the engine to pull out of the driveway, her stomach one tight knot.