A/N: I know it's been a hot minute since I posted the last chapter, and I'm sorry about that, but there is a significant reason for this delay (besides the limited time I have to write right now… boo). Not long after I posted chapter 51, I realized that in order to properly tell parts of the story from here on out, I really need to know with 100% certainty how this story is going to end, which I haven't completely nailed down yet. So, I started going back and forth, editing the next few chapters to post while trying to draft out the ending, but this caused two problems. First, I was getting confused jumping back and forth in time in the story, trying to edit some things while drafting new things (going between drafting mode and editing mode is hard). And second, there are certain things that should be at least mentioned in the next five to ten chapters that I can't write yet, because I don't know the ending details. A few weeks ago, I started trying to focus on drafting out the end, but then I felt bad for leaving you all hanging for so long with no explanation, so came back to get this chapter ready and let you know what's going on.
So, what this all boils down to, is this will be the last chapter I will post until I hash out the ending. My goal is to be ready to post chapter 53 by late November or early December (it will hopefully be sooner but I'm trying to be realistic and account for life things coming up too). If I can get into drafting mode and stay there until the ending is done, that process will go so much faster. This will also allow me to stay in editing mode after the draft is done, so that process will also go much faster. Then, once I get to the point to start posting again, I will be in a better position to post more frequently and on a much more consistent basis, like I did in the beginning (for those of you who have been reading since I first started posting). This will allow you to all enjoy the rest of the story without such long breaks to where you forget what's going on in the story. I am also a reader of fanfiction, so I understand the frustration when you have to wait so long, and don't want to continue to do it to you. I still have a lot more story to tell (I've already drafted through chapter 68 with at least five to eight more to go) and I want you to be able to enjoy the rest of it without so much time in between chapters.
I appreciate each and every one of you, whether you've been reading since I started or have just recently found this story. Every subscriber, kudos, and comment mean the world to me and sometimes I can't believe so many people like my little runaway story that has grown beyond what I would have ever expected when I first sat down to imagine how it would go if Jake actually got to kiss Bella.
Sorry this note has gotten so long… I just want to say one final thing. I want to reiterate my previous promise, that I will not abandon this story. I have put far too much into it to not see it finished. I want to know the ending as much as you do! :D So, please stick with me and I promise you'll get a completed story! If you want to make sure you know when I start posting again, be sure to subscribe to get email notifications for when I post a chapter.
As always, the world and characters belong to Stephenie Meyers (except Grammy Jo).
Happy reading!
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CHAPTER 52
~~BELLA POV~~
I WOKE WITH A START and jolted straight up, unsure where I was. Blinking into the nearly dark space around me, my disoriented brain was slow to focus. With the help of the small amount of light coming through the windows, I finally figured out that I was in my bedroom, in my own bed, but I don't remember coming home. The last thing I remembered was being in Jake's arms running through the forest in almost complete darkness
A hand touched my back and I jumped and squeaked in surprise. Spinning my head quickly to the left I recognized Jake's form lying beside me in the darkness, just able to make out an amused grin spreading across his face at my reaction. My eyes went wide as my head swiveled quickly over to my wide opened bedroom door, Charlie's snores echoing through the walls, and then turned back to Jake whose smile had grown.
"Relax baby. Charlie knows I'm in here."
Somehow my eyes managed to widen even more and then my face crumpled in confusion. "Wait, what? He knows you're in my bed with me?! And he's okay with that?"
"Well, he wasn't thrilled about it, but it became necessary." Jake tugged on my arm to pull me back down next to him and I went willingly, snuggling against his side. "You passed out on the way back to Emily's and I couldn't get you to wake up for anything. I brought you home, planning to sleep on the couch, but you kept calling for me. I would sit with you until you'd settle but each time I left your room, it wasn't long before you were calling out for me again. Charlie resisted at first, but after it became obvious we weren't going to get any sleep if it continued, he finally relented and acknowledged that you needed me to be with you."
"Wow. Having Charlie know what's going on with us certainly makes things easier. Even still, I'm surprised he allowed this."
"Oh, well, he made it clear that it was just for the one night and your door had to remain open." Jake chuckled and started running his fingers over my hair. "He realizes our need for each other goes deeper than normal relationships, even if he doesn't fully understand it, so I don't think he would actually deny us being together if that's what you needed. It's hard for him, though. He knows his time with you under his roof is limited, so he's just trying to hold onto it as long as he can. He doesn't want to let his little girl go."
I absently spun my engagement ring around my finger as I considered what this all must be like for Charlie. "He's been so great about everything, sometimes I forget how hard it must all be for him to grasp." I sighed then shifted to look up at Jake's face, resting my chin on my hand against his chest. "I wonder why the healings last night took so much more out of me."
Jake nodded and hummed thoughtfully. "I was wondering about that myself and thought it over quite a lot last night. I think it's because you didn't just heal them physically. You also helped them in other ways. My power only refills your physical energy, so when something takes more of a mental toll on you, you have to recover on your own. It's also possible that healing the boys in their wolf forms took more from you as well."
I considered that for a moment. "That would make sense. You know, I think Brady would have lost that eye if I didn't have this healing ability." I shuddered at the thought.
Jake pulled me in a little closer. "I wondered about that too. I'm so incredibly thankful for you, Bella. For so very many reasons."
Propping myself up on my elbows I looked at Jake's handsome face and the sincerity there. A flood of emotions washed through me anew… whether from me or from him, I couldn't say for certain, but it didn't matter.
"I love you, Jake," I whispered, sliding up so that our faces were closer together, his intense eyes locked on mine sending tingles through me. "This life feels so unreal, I sometimes question my sanity." He smiled gently at me. "But no matter what, I know I never have to question this. You. Us. Our love for each other."
His thumb brushed over my jaw, and I closed the small distance to touch my lips to his for a brief chaste kiss. As soon as our lips touched though, the electric current between us flared and we both moved to deepen the kiss, his fingers in my hair and an arm coming tight around my ribs. After only a few moments we caught ourselves and before it could get more intense, we pulled away from each other, already breathless.
"Damn that's hard to fight," Jake breathed in frustration.
"Yeah, no kidding." I flopped over onto my back, so we were lying side by side. "At least we won't have to fight it forever."
Jake took my hand in his, lacing our fingers together. I turned my head toward him to find him smiling at me. A bashful smile curved my own lips and my face heated. As we laid next to each other in silence, I began to drift back to sleep with the feeling of Jake's thumb brushing over the ring on my finger, a reminder of what was soon to come for us.
My alarm blaring at me jarred me out of sleep once more and I groggily reached over to shut it off. Jake was no longer lying next to me, and muffled voices drifted through my still open door. With a groan, I forced myself out of bed and into the bathroom to get ready for my second day back to work. The shower helped wake me up, then I quickly dressed and headed down to the kitchen.
Jake and Charlie were sitting at the kitchen table discussing something sports related, which I immediately tuned out. It brought a smile to my face though, to see how easy it was for them to spend time together.
"Morning Bells," Charlie said as I approached the table. "How're you feeling?"
"Morning. I feel great. Sorry that I kept you guys up last night though. I have no memory of any of it."
Jake slipped an arm around my waist when I reached his side, and I gave him a quick kiss on the cheek before getting myself some cereal and sitting at the table with them.
"It's alright," Charlie was responding as he watched our interaction. "I don't really understand all this stuff between you two, but I'm glad Jake was here to help you sleep."
I smiled at Charlie, suddenly aware that I'd had no awkward feelings with that small display of affection with Jake in front of Charlie. It had felt so natural that I couldn't bring myself to care. And Charlie didn't seem to mind either.
"Yeah," I replied, "we don't fully understand everything either. Thanks for letting him do that though. It means a lot that you trust us."
Our conversation moved on to the plans for the day. Jake had two cars that he needed to finish working on and one more that he hoped to at least get started, so he was having Embry and Leah keep watch while I was at work.
Charlie was heading down to Sue's for the day. He'd been spending a lot of time with her, and I watched him a little more closely as he spoke about her. I had a sneaking suspicion that they were becoming more than just friends and I wasn't completely sure what to feel about that. Even though I didn't know Sue very well, I liked her, and Charlie deserved to have someone special in his life. If it made him happy, I decided I could be okay with it.
NEWTON'S WAS SUPER BUSY with both locals and tourists. The constant flow of customers made the day fly by, but it had also been super hectic. That's why, with about an hour and a half left in my shift, I was ready for it to be over.
Much of the reason for my desire to leave was due to the particularly needy group of nine out-of-town hikers who had been completely unprepared for the May weather in the area. Their lack of knowledge made me realize how much I had learned since starting work at Newton's, but it was also trying my patience. Why go on a long camping trip to an unfamiliar area without making sure to educate yourself on the weather? So, Mike and I had worked together for the last hour or so to make sure they had everything they would need. And it seemed like they needed everything!
Pushing my way out of the back storeroom, overburdened with sleeping bags, I inwardly groaned when the bell over the front doors jingled. I struggled not to drop anything and glanced up as Mrs. Newton greeted the new customers. Something about the two guys who had walked in made me uneasy, sending a chill up my spine. After a moment I shook my head at myself. I needed to get a grip. We were all a little on edge since that new vampire had showed up, followed by no activity all week.
"You alright Bella?"
I jumped at Mike's voice beside me and spun toward him, dropping one sleeping bag and whacking him in the head with another.
"Ooph. Hey, watch where you're swinging those things," he scolded with a light-hearted smirk as he took them from me.
"Sorry." I let out a tense laugh. "You startled me."
"What's wrong? You look like you've seen a ghost."
"Nothing. I'm fine," I hedged, but couldn't shake the uneasiness as another chill slid down my spine. I glanced back over to where the new customers were. They didn't really seem to be looking at anything on the shelves. Instead, their creepy, leering gazes were on the large group of tourists we'd been working with. I stopped breathing as one of them drew in a long breath through his nose and a wicked grin spread across his face as he exhaled. My mouth went dry, and my heart began pounding in my chest… I had seen a look like that before… last spring, in a dark, empty ballet studio in Arizona.
"Bella? Hey, Bella!" Mike was shaking my arm and I realized that he'd still been speaking to me.
"Um, I'm sorry Mike," I choked out, hardly able to make any sound. "I'm suddenly not feeling too well."
"Yeah, I can see that. I was just saying why don't you go take a little break."
I nodded, looking back to the two pale figures again. They had started to slowly make their way to the back of the store, and as I got a better look at them, I had no more doubts. Two pairs of vivid red eyes stared straight at me, confirming my fears.
Jake! Vampires… in the store…
"Yeah, I think I will take a break now," I finally whispered to Mike.
Show me Bella, Jake's shocked voice immediately came back.
I opened my mind to him so he could see what I was seeing. The vampires were moving in my direction, their steps unhurried, evil smirks on their faces. I had no doubt that they could hear my heart racing and could tell that I knew exactly what they were, and they seemed to be enjoying my fear.
Mike said something else to me, but I didn't hear him. I was frozen in place as my mind reeled with what I should do, but the fear coursing through my veins was making me incapable of coming up with a solution.
Jake had said he thought these new vampires might do something unexpected, but I'm not sure he ever thought it would be something like this. How did they get past Embry and Leah? And how were they so controlled around all these people? They couldn't be newborns, or they would have just started murdering everyone in here.
Go out the back door and head straight for the woods behind the store. Embry and Leah will be there.
Jake's steady, sure voice grounded me and, along with the strength he sent through to me, allowed me to make my limbs move and do as he instructed. I walked as quickly and calmly as I could manage to the side door at the back of the building, not wanting to draw attention and cause Mike or Mrs. Newton to be concerned and follow me outside. As I pushed the door opened, I glanced back to see that Mike had stopped the vampires to speak with them. It wouldn't hold them up for long, but it might give me just enough time to reach the trees… and I prayed that they wouldn't harm Mike or anyone else inside.
As soon as I was out the door I sprinted across the back lot, more thankful than ever for my new and improved speed and that I was no longer a klutz since imprinting. It wasn't quite enough though, and just as I reached the tree line, as if out of thin air, the vampires appeared before me. I skidded to a stop, nearly crashing into them.
"Where do you think you're going, Sweet Blood?" the taller of the two asked me.
"You didn't think you could outrun us, did you?" the second vampire mused. I took a step back as he leaned toward me. He breathed in deeply, then released a feral sounding groan. "You smell even better in person. It's too bad we can't have a taste. You really will be a treat."
I winced and my skin crawled as the shorter one ran his icy finger down my face. Where were Embry and Leah?
Just as quickly as they had appeared in front of me, they disappeared in a blur of gray and I was knocked backward, falling to the ground, and smacking my head on something rock-hard. I didn't lose consciousness, thankfully, but my vision blurred, and stars danced across my view.
I took a moment to assess any injuries as the warmth of my healing magic started. From a distance, the twisting metal sound of a vampire being dismembered reached me, followed by a yelp of pain that was cut off.
My head was the only injury I detected, so I slowly brought myself upright. Everything around me was swaying and spinning, so I had to close my eyes and rest my head on my bent knees to keep from passing out. I contemplated suppressing my magic to conserve my energy since Jake wasn't there, but I wouldn't be going anywhere until my head cleared anyway, so I let it flow through me. Hopefully no one could see me from the store.
More sounds of destruction rang through the air, a little closer this time. Then everything went quiet.
Jake?
Almost there, baby.
"Bella, I'm so sorry," Leah's voice was close beside me, her hand coming to rest lightly on my shoulder. "Are you okay?"
I nodded, my forehead resting against my knees. I gently probed around the back of my scalp to discover a sizable bump that was quickly receding. I didn't smell blood though, so at least I didn't have to deal with that.
"It's okay, Leah," I spoke into my lap, unable to lift my head yet. "I know they were crowding me, so you had limited space to work with. Did you get both of them?"
"Yeah, they're both destroyed. Are you sure you're okay?"
I tried lifting my head to look at Leah and reassure her, but immediately regretted the action and had to put it down again when a wave of nausea washed over me. I probably had a concussion.
"I just knocked my head on the ground. I'll be fine though. I already feel better than I did a couple of minutes ago."
"I'm here," Jake's voice was right next to me, his hand on my back as he crouched behind me.
I breathed a sigh of relief as a surge of energy flowed through me.
"I'm sorry, Jake. I tried not to hit her." Leah sounded so distraught, I reached out a hand toward her and she took it.
"It's fine, Leah," Jake said, his voice kind. "You did the right thing. No permanent damage done. Go help Embry gather the pieces. Quil and Seth will be here any minute to help you dispose of them. Tell Embry to come find me when they get here."
I squeezed her hand, and she squeezed mine in return before letting go and moving silently away. Jake wrapped his other arm around my middle and pulled me closer to him, burying his face in my hair. His heat enveloped me like a comforting blanket, and we were silent for the next couple of minutes while the healing finished. When I looked up as the light was fading from both of us, worry lined Jake's face and I reached up to press my palm against his cheek.
"I'm okay now."
His face relaxed some and he helped me get to my feet then wrapped his arms around me again and sighed. "We have no idea how they got past Embry and Leah."
Trying not to think too much about what just happened, I laid my cheek against Jake's bare chest with my arms tucked in between us against his firm abdomen. A little shiver went through me, but I definitely wasn't cold.
"Maybe they drove here?" I offered. "You guys thought the vampire that was in my room might have driven."
"Hmmm… maybe. If these leeches start driving everywhere, that's going to make them much harder to track."
I tilted my head back to look up at his face. "Were either of these the vampire that was in my room?"
He shook his head, his lips pressed into a thin line. "No. Two new scents. At least they're dead now."
"You were right, Jake, about these new vampires doing something unusual. This definitely isn't normal behavior, to attack in the middle of the day with so many people around. Also, I don't think these were newborns. At least not brand-new ones. They didn't seem to have any trouble controlling themselves around all the people in the store. But they called me Sweet Blood, just like Edward said the other vampire did, so they must be connected."
"Yeah, it's definitely not adding up with what Carlisle has told us. We'll meet with the Cullens again and get their take on all of this. You're almost done with work for today, right?"
"About an hour left on my shift."
"Okay. They probably won't make another attempt today, but I'm not going to take any chances, so I'll stay out here with Embry. Let me know when you're ready to leave."
He held me tight and gave me a lingering kiss, reluctant to let me go. After another assessing look at me, he finally released me. As I turned to head back into the store, he jogged off into the trees.
AN HOUR AND a half later, I was sitting in my truck, sandwiched between Jake and Embry as we pulled out of Newton's parking lot. We were stopping by to pick up Angela and then heading down to La Push for the rest of the day. Sue had invited the four of us along with Charlie and Billy over for dinner and I was really looking forward to it. Leah and Seth would be there as well.
The original plan was to hang out at Emily's for the afternoon. However, with the vampires showing up at Newton's we didn't want to be separated from each other and Jake still had some more work on a car to finish up, so Angela and I decided to hang out in the garage while Embry helped Jake with a couple of the repairs.
I always loved to watch Jake work in his garage. It reminded me of a simpler time. I may have been a shell of the person I am now, but we were blissfully unaware of the supernatural that was now a part of our daily lives.
When the guys were all finished, they went to get cleaned up. The air was damp, but the temperature was pleasant, so Angela and I perched on the steps of Jake's small front porch while we waited. We were deep in a discussion about our final English assignment for the year when a car pulled up in front of the house. I didn't recognize the driver, but Billy was in the passenger seat. He opened the door and stepped out of the car. My heart warmed every time I saw him stand and walk. He had been diligently doing the exercises that the doctor had given him and going on long walks and he was getting stronger every day. Though he always took his wheelchair with him when he went to town, he rarely had to use it anymore, so long as he paced himself.
He strode confidently over to us as his friend got his chair out of the trunk. "Hey Bella. Angela. What are you two up to?"
"Just waiting for Jake and Embry," I answered, squinting a little from the muted sunlight as I looked up at Billy.
"You're looking good, Mr. Black," Angela said.
She was right. Billy looked great. His coloring was better, and he looked like he'd already trimmed down a little. His doctor had advised him to continue to watch his diet to make sure the diabetes didn't return, and Billy was taking it seriously. I felt pretty sure that it was gone for good, but I couldn't say with one hundred percent certainty, so I kept that to myself. Instead, I'd made some diabetic friendly meals to freeze for him to help him out a little, along with a couple of sugar-free desserts. He seemed determined to take full advantage of the new lease on life he'd been given.
"I feel fantastic! And I don't think I've eaten this good in ages, thanks to all of your amazing food, Bella. Sure wish I'd had you to cook for me before now."
I felt a pang of guilt in my chest that I hadn't thought to cook for him before, but I pushed that aside and smiled warmly at him. "I'm happy to help you out! Let me know when you're running low, and I'll make some more."
"I'll do that, only next time I'll get the groceries… don't want you spending all of Charlie's money to feed me. Maybe you could also cook here and teach me a few things."
"I would love that." I fought against the sudden lump in my throat, thinking of how it was Sarah who taught me and now, because of the time she'd invested in me, she was still able to take care of Billy in some small way, years after she was gone.
Billy's friend approached with the wheelchair in tow while I fought to get my emotions under control and trying not to let them go through to Jake so he wouldn't worry.
The new man was a few inches shorter than Billy, stocky with a thick neck, barrel chest, and a belly that protruded just a little. He had the same russet skin and straight black hair that was common for the Quileute's, but his eyes were a striking golden hazel. He reached Billy's side just as Jake came out of the house.
"Hey Dad! Frank. Here, let me take that for you." Jake stepped past where Angela and I were seated to take Billy's chair from the other man. When he turned back toward the house he paused for a moment and studied my face. My emotions now reined in, I gave him a small smile knowing he must have felt something through our bond. Satisfied with what he saw, he nodded then returned inside to put the chair away.
"Frank," Billy said, his chest puffing out a bit, "have you met my future daughter-in-law yet?"
The man's kind eyes widened a little as he looked at me with new interest. "No, I don't believe I have."
"Well, Frank, this is Bella Swan, Charlie Swan's daughter and Jake's fiancé."
I stood to shake Frank's hand, meeting his curious gaze and smiling.
"Bella," Billy continued, "this is my good friend, Frank Hawkins. He's been helping me get around since Jake's been so busy lately."
"It's nice to meet you, Mr. Hawkins," I said.
"Please, call me Frank," he corrected.
I tipped my head in assent. "Nice to meet you, Frank."
"And this is Bella's friend, Angela," Billy added. "She's dating Embry Call."
"Ah yes," he said as he took Angela's offered hand. "I believe I've seen the two of you coming and going from his house a few times. I live just a little down the road from he and his mother. I try not to be the nosey neighbor, but I live alone since my Francine died a few years ago and our two children are away at college. It's hard not to notice some things when there's no one else around to give my attention to. I do also try to keep an eye on things for Tiffany since it's just her and Embry, especially since he's been so much busier lately."
"Oh, well it's nice to meet you," Angela replied sweetly. "And I'm sorry for the loss of your wife."
He waved a hand of dismissal, his cheeks coloring a little. "Thank you. I miss her fiercely, but she was sick for a while, so her passing, while hard, was also somewhat of a relief."
"Well, I'm sure Tiffany and Embry appreciate you keeping an eye out for her."
He looked a little embarrassed at Angela's kind words, and he quickly changed the subject. "My son, Mark, just returned home a little over a week ago. He's not that much older than you kids. He just graduated from Washington State University and is coming back to teach at the tribal school starting next year. He'll be working at Cool Water Rentals for the summer though."
"That's right," Billy said as Jake came back out of the house and stood behind me, placing his hands on my shoulders. "I forgot he was coming home this summer. When was the last time he was able to come visit?"
"Let's see." Frank looked up and tapped his finger on his chin in thought. "Not since summer before last, if my memory serves me correctly, so almost two years now. And he was only able to stay for a week that time. It sure is nice to have him home to stay now."
I saw a look flash over Billy's face, his lips thinning and pressing together for just an instant as he glanced over my head at Jake. The look was gone as quickly as it came, but there was definitely concern in it. I glanced up at Jake, but his expression didn't show any reaction.
"What about Amber?" Jake asked. "Will she be able to visit this summer? She's still got another year of school, right?"
"Well, she's trying to graduate early, so she took classes last summer and will again this summer to hopefully be done after next fall. So, she won't be home this summer… unless it's just for a short visit. Say, Jake, I hear congratulations are in order. How'd you manage to snag such a sweet, pretty thing?"
My face flared with heat as Jake's arm wrapped around my front.
"Thank you," he replied. "I don't really know how I got so lucky."
Stop it! I scolded Jake.
Nope. I speak only the truth.
"Well, you be sure and hold onto her."
"Always."
Embry showed up while we chatted for a few more minutes. Once Frank left and Billy had gone inside, Jake spoke to Embry.
"I got ahold of Doc and they're available anytime today."
"That's good," Embry replied, "though I doubt they're going to have any new info."
"Maybe not, but it's good that we all stay informed."
"When are you going?" I asked.
"I was able to reach Sam at Emily's, so he's going to get Jared and meet us now. We'll drop you girls off at Sue's and be back there in time for dinner."
"Oh," I exclaimed excitedly, "I want to go with you." I was dying to see Esme and it had been almost two weeks since I'd gotten to spend any time with Alice.
"Not today honey. This isn't a social visit. We just need to focus on discussing what happened today."
"Well, I mainly just want to see Esme," I pressed. "So, I can catch up with her while you guys talk to the others."
"No Bella." Jake's voice was firm. "That will just need to wait until another day."
"Jake, they've been back nearly a week and I haven't gotten to see any of –"
"Bella, I said no!"
I jumped at Jake's near yell and took a step back in shock. He never raised his voice at me or ordered me around and I wasn't sure what to say. My eyes burned and I tried control my emotions as I just stared at him, noting that Angela and Embry had wandered several yards away from us.
Jake sighed loudly and ran both of his hands roughly through his still damp hair and looked up to the sky before gripping the back of his neck.
"Bella, I'm sorry." Looking back down to me, his hands fell to his sides, his voice and expression pained. "I didn't mean to yell at you. It's just, after today…" He swallowed hard. "I just can't handle you being near any more vampires right now. I know it's not the same, but I'm still uncomfortable with the Cullens that have just come back and I just… right now I just need to know that you're somewhere safe and nowhere near any vampires. I promise we'll set up a time for you to see Alice and the other one, Emers—"
"Esme," I corrected quietly.
"Yes, Esme. Please baby, don't fight me on this. I'm not trying to tell you what to do, and I hate denying you something you want, I just need for you to do this for me. I nearly lost it today when you told me there were vampires there. The first day that I've been away from you since this new leech showed up and bloodsuckers come looking for you. And then, when you showed me, and the way they were looking at you…" He trailed off and closed his eyes. "I was…" His eyes opened again, and the intensity in them took my breath away. "I would have never forgiven myself if anything had happened to you." An agitated wildness came over his face. "I just can't… I can only handle so much, and I don't think I can trust myself right now if you… if you were to… if anything…"
His hands were balled into tight fists and trembling, and it was then that I realized in my excitement at the thought of seeing Esme again, I had missed what he was feeling. Or maybe he had been blocking it from me. Either way, it was coming through loud and clear now, and he was spiraling in thoughts of what might have happened today at the store. He had stayed so calm earlier that I hadn't realized how much it had affected him and that he was blaming himself for not being there. I quickly closed the distance between us and wound my fingers through his hair to pull his forehead down against mine.
"Okay… it's okay Jake," I reassured him then pulled us into our solitude.
I'm sorry. I didn't realize how upset you still were about today. I can wait.
He took a long, ragged breath and silver lined his eyes. When he squeezed them shut, a single tear slipped free.
I shouldn't have yelled at you. I just… if anything had happened… I can't fathom my life without you Bella. I don't think I could continue—
I know Jake. There is no me without you or you without me. My life will end the day yours does. There will be no recovering from it. There is us together, or there is nothing.
Yes… us or nothing. I love you so very much.
His arms wrapped around me tightly, bowing my body firmly against his, the heat consuming me inside and out as his lips greedily claimed mine. There was no trying to fight the electric desire this time and we couldn't care less about the time passing or who might see. Pouring all of our love for each other into that kiss, wrapped in our special place together, we found the reassuring connection that we so desperately needed in that moment.
