Author Notes - You may or may not remember me saying that I had attempted a BfBB adaptation a few years ago. Well, for one reason or another, I actually finished just one chapter: the Robot Sandy fight. So, a lot of this chapter is actually reused straight from this much older draft, with some obvious additions to make it match what I've written today. Why? Because I actually really liked what I had written, even if it needed a lot of touch-ups.

CHAPTER FIVE - SPONGEBOB VS SANDY GREASE!

Ooh, it appears zat we are up to a boss fight. I think zere is someone who can introduce zis chapter better zen I can.

THE POSEIDOME! Located by King Neptune's palace, home of epic battles of frycooking! Our porous hero and his friends have been sent a challenge by King Neptune himself to battle a mighty foe! But what kind of mighty foe could be so mighty that even King Neptune cannot take it down?

Oui, much better.

SpongeBob blinked, and next thing he knew he was standing in the corner of the ring, thanks to King Neptune's power. He could remember this arena from way back, when he had pulled out the Golden Spatula and Neptune challenged him to a duel. A duel that he won, of course, thanks to the 'quality over quantity' rule. And here he was again, plus Squidward and minus a butt-faced Patrick.

'Welcome, one and all, to my Poseidome!' King Neptune yelled, his voice echoing in his arena. 'Tonight, we will see three heroes battle a powerful enemy and look death itself in the eyes! No refunds.'

His voice was the only thing that could be heard above the crowd's cheering. The seats had been absolutely packed to the brim with all sorts of people, from places all over Bikini Bottom. Many were holding up signs, many in favour of the sponge and his friends while one of them read simply 'BOO!'.

'Hi Sam!' Patrick said, waving to his sisters in the crowd. 'Hi Squidina!'

Squidward sighed. 'Well, this would be a good time to check up on my health insurance.'

SpongeBob couldn't help trembling at the knees. So many people were staring at him; the pressure was on. And Neptune knows what kind of challenge Neptune had for them! And Sandy… he couldn't stop thinking about his furry friend. Where was she? What had happened to her? Was she even still with them?

'Welcome all, to the Royal Family Poseidome!' Queen Amphitrite's voice boomed through the building. 'We apologise for having our annual fight much earlier than usual, but we had to set this all up in a hurry.'

Amphitrite sat on her own platform, one much like the ones announcers have at real sports rings. She wasn't the only one behind a microphone, for her two kids had joined her. Triton and Mindy sat by her side, each with a microphone of their own. This was perhaps the first time in his life that SpongeBob had seen both Triton and Mindy in the same room at the same time.

'Thank you for the wonderful introduction, Honey!' Neptune said, before he turned to his challengers. 'I have brought you three here to face a great challenge.'

SpongeBob gulped down his fear and stood in a karate-esque pose. 'I've got nerves of steel, and muscles of sand.'

Patrick held up his arm. 'And eyes of jelly!'

Squidward buried his eyes in his hand. 'Oh brother…'

The crowd cheered for the little yellow guy even harder.

'SpongeBob is our returning champion!' Mindy said, talking quite dramatically into her mic. 'To this day, he has been the only person in history to ever beat Daddy in a fry cooking duel!'

Neptune frowned. 'Thanks for reminding everyone of that, Sweetie… Anyway,' He immediately went back to his grand announcer voice. 'My Poseidome has been breached, by a mighty foe who you must vanquish!'

'You telling me this is a combat challenge?' Squidward asked, crossing his arms. 'I would've said no if I knew this challenge could get me killed!'

'Well, you didn't really have a choice.'

SpongeBob took a deep breath to pump some air into his chest, puffing it out so it looked vaguely like abs. Small ones, but abs nonetheless.

'Bring it on your highness.' He said. 'Bring! It! On!'

'GOOOO SPONGEBOB!' Patrick cheered.

'We're fighting in this challenge too, ya nitwit!' Squidward said.

Though SpongeBob was certainly not an egotistical man, it was still delightful to indulge in the crowd's cheering.

'BOO! YOU STINK!'

Except for that one idiot, of course.

'In this corner!' Triton announced, pointing at the corner even know hardly anyone saw it. 'A small square dude!'

'Hey, give him a little credit.' Mindy said. 'If it wasn't for him, you'd still be locked up in that shrinking cage.'

'Yeah, I totally know that. I'm just hyping things up for the audience.'

SpongeBob waved nervously at a non-existent camera.

'And in this corner-'

Before he could finish his sentence, there was a mighty CRASH in the opposite corner of the Poseidome. Something big and strong had charged its way right through it. Dust scattered through the air and debris went everywhere. Fortunately, no one got hurt.

'MY LEG!'

For the most part. Very soon, the dust settled and this foe's identity became clear. And SpongeBob's jaw fell wide open when he saw it. No, it couldn't be…

'As I was saying.' Triton said. 'And in this corner, a huge and totally murderous robot! Gnarly.'

'Shaped like a squirrel!' Mindy added.

'S-Sandy?!' SpongeBob cried.

No, it wasn't Sandy. Sandy wasn't ten-feet-tall or many entirely of metal. But this 'huge and totally murderous robot' looked so much like her. A clear dome covering her head, a big white suit… if it wasn't for the exhaust pipe she had for a tail, she'd look almost exactly like the real thing. Oh, and the acorn on her little emblem was now a metallic nut, but that was a small thing compared to everything else.

'Sandy!' Patrick said, throwing his arms into the air in cheer. 'You're back!'

'That's obviously just a robotic version of her, Patrick!' Squidward yelled.

SpongeBob couldn't understand it. A giant robotic Sandy suddenly appears just as the real squirrel disappeared? It could not just be a coincidence.

'HOWDY!'

And the voice… oh Neptune, the voice. It sounded like Sandy alright, but without the emotion or soul. It reverbed like a terrible microphone, and didn't change pitch once. The mighty robot leapt over the ropes of the ring, slamming her feet into the floor so hard that the entire Poseidome shook.

'Er…' SpongeBob said, grinning nervously. 'I think I need to get home. To feed Gary.'

'Your beloved pet will have to settle with eating your couch today!' Neptune declared. 'FOR THE CHALLENGE IS ON!'

'Welp, I'm out!' Squidward said, vaulting over the barriers and hiding in the shadows.

SpongeBob gulped, while Patrick continued to grin like an idiot. Robot Sandy, even though her mouth couldn't move, appeared to put on a wicked grin and beckoned for the sponge to attack. Gulping a second time, SpongeBob stepped forward into the middle of the arena and prayed for the best.

'Uh, hi, Sandy.' He said, his grin so nervous at this point that all his teeth were visible. 'So you wanna maybe… talk this one out?'

'I LIKE YA, SPONGEBOB!' Robot Sandy roared. 'WE COULD BE TIGHTA THAN BARK ON A TREE!'

The sea sponge was suddenly hit with a feeling of deja vu. Hadn't she said that exact sentence once before? The sensation distracted him so much that he just barely noticed Robot Sandy leaping across the arena and raising her arm for a karate chop!

'AHHHH!'

He screamed and dove out of the way, his face scraping against the floor upon reentry. He hopped to his feet and rearranged his face just in time to witness Robot Sandy leaving a massive dent in the floor, right where he had been standing.

The crowd practically roared.

'And SpongeBob gets a lucky dodge right on the first attack!' Mindy said. 'But only time will tell if he is so lucky on the next karate chop.'

'S-S-Sandy…' SpongeBob stammered. 'M-Maybe we could talk this out a bit more.'

'YOU'RE ABOUT AS UGLY AS HOMEMADE SOUP!'

Deja vu… again! SpongeBob opened his mouth to defend the honour of homemade soup, but someone jumped to his defence.

'HEY!' Patrick yelled, stepping out in front of the robot. 'That's my friend you're calling ugly!'

'I NEVER THOUGHT THAT FOLKS AROUND HERE WERE PARTICULARLY BRIGHT.' Robot Sandy said, staring down at him. 'BUT THIS MORNING, EVERYONE SEEMS AS DUMB AS TRAFFIC CONES!'

Patrick pouted. 'Hey, I may be dumb, but I… you… Well, at least I'm not from Texas!'

The very moment that Robot Sandy's auditory receptors picked up on this insult, her green eyes suddenly turned red.

'DON'T YOU DARE TAKE THE NAME OF TEXAS IN VAIN!'

Patrick's confidence deflated, almost literally as he head drooped.

'DON'T YOU HAVE TO BE STUPID SOMEWHERE ELSE?!'

The sea star checked a non-existent watch. 'Uh, not until-'

Robot Sandy readied up a powerful punch and delivered it square into his stomach!

'FOOOOUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRR!'

Though she held back, surprisingly, it sent him flying across the arena until he crashed into the wall. No one could see him past the impact dust. With him out of the way, Robot Sandy aimed her efforts back at SpongeBob. She ran across the arena with shocking speed for her size, raising her arm for another mighty chop.

'OH SWEET NEPTUNE!' SpongeBob yelled, as the squirrel-shaped shadow grew in size over him.

'What's this?' Amphitrite said. 'It appears that the sea star has given Robot Sandy the motivation to really fight!'

'Now SpongeBob is really gonna have to use all of his skills!' Mindy declared.

SpongeBob stretched his right leg all the way to the side and snapped to it, zooming out of the way of Robot Sandy's powerful karate chop. This time, she left a big hole in the floor, and her eyes glared directly at him.

'Oh, this is bad!' He said, gripping the corners of his head. 'This is bad bad bad bad BAD!'

'What's the problem now?' Squidward yelled from the darkness.

'If you insult Texas, that really angers Sandy!'

So, Squidward turned around to face where Patrick was last seen. 'YOU ARE PROOF THAT STARFISH HAVE NO BRAINS!'

'Oh yeah?' Patrick said, his voice audible among the cheering ground. 'Well, you're proof that octopuses don't really have three hearts. Heartless!'

SpongeBob could pay no attention to their little argument, for he was too busy staring at the big angry robot. With Patrick out of commission and Squidward unwilling to join, it was all up to him. If only he could think! He pounded his little square head, as if that would get his brain working.

If only I didn't make that stupid wish!

'MY KARATE'S BETTER THAN YOURS, AND I'VE NEVER BEEN INVITED!'

He opened his eyes, which he didn't even realise were closed, to witness Robot Sandy running over to the other side of the ring and bouncing off the ropes. Her feet extended all the way to the walls of the arena, being attached to her body with very long strings. The momentum from the ropes was all she needed to slide across the floor with her feet-springs sweeping along.

'WOAH!' Mindy yelled. 'The old clothesline move! Robot Sandy is pulling all stops on SpongeBob now.'

'HOLY NEPTUNE!' SpongeBob yelled.

'Ahem.' Neptune said. 'I would appreciate it if you didn't take my name in vain.'

SpongeBob leapt over the springs as they passed underneath him, using his arms to break his fall before he landed flat on his face. Robot Sandy didn't stop her clothesline move until she reached the other side, whereupon her feet snapped right back into place.

'WHAT THA-?! I'LL GIVE YA 100% OF MA FIST!'

Giving no warning, she leapt into the air like a jaguar, barely missing the scoreboard in the process.

'Look at her go!' Mindy said. 'Robot Sandy has literally jumped to her homeland's defence!'

'Com'on, sis.' Triton said, crossing his arms. 'Let me said something totally cool for once.'

SpongeBob then noticed the squirrel-shaped shadow that surrounded him.

'WHOA!'

He leapt out of the way...

*CRASH*

... right as Robot Sandy delivered a karate chop into the floor right where our porous hero was standing!

'And the square dude gets out of the way just in time!' Triton said, smirking at Mindy.

'Oh, now that's just petty.' She remarked.

The audience yelled with cheer.

'SHE-OOT! HE'S MORE SLIPPERY THAN A POCKET FULL OF PUDDIN'.'

SpongeBob laughed nervously. 'Hey, I love pudding! And I also love friendship, and not fighting for my life. Can we stop now?'

Robot Sandy's response was to stand back up, and glare directly at him.

'Do something SpongeBob!' Squidward shouted from the sidelines, veins popping up across his forehead.

'Do what?!' SpongeBob yelled back. 'Sandy is tough enough to fight on her own, and now she's a giant robot! She's unbeatable!'

'Well, think of something, preferably something that doesn't involve me!'

Think SpongeBob, think!

'HIT HER!' Squidward shrieked from his hiding spot.

'Uh, okay!'

SpongeBob stood with his legs apart, giving Robot Sandy that smirk that's on every animated movie poster ever.

'Alright Sand-Day, prepare for my kah-rah-tae!'

He lifted his arm up, and readied his chop.

'HI-YA!'

He swung his arm down, slamming his hand straight into her torso... which resulted in absolutely no damage to the robot while his whole arm shattered. It was as if he punched Mr Krabs right in the armour abs.

'Uh, Squidward, I don't think that hitting her will work!'

'Of course hitting her won't work!' Squidward yelled back. 'She's made of metal, isn't she?!'

'But you told me to-'

'WISE UP! KNOW THINGS!'

No time to argue. He had a raging robot on his hand, and his shattered arm was just now beginning to grow back.

'I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF YOUR DASTARDLY DEEDS, DIRTY DAN!'

This one quote gave SpongeBob the worst case of deja vu he ever had. He cringed just remembering that awful time. He needed an idea NOW! Pure brawn wasn't going to beat this monster, but maybe something would… If only his stupid brain would work!

'What's wrong with SpongeBob?' Mindy asked. 'He seems to be totally frozen!'

'He better act quick,' Triton said. 'Or he'll be turned into sponge stew! Dude...'

The metallic fist stood above him, ready to chop him clean in half. He didn't notice it; his mind wouldn't allow him to.

'Hey, you big shiny bully! Get away from my best friend!'

The fist never came.

Patrick leapt over the barriers of the ring and jumped into the air as high as he could possibly go. Once he had achieved maximum height, he delivered a powerful belly slam right by Robot Sandy's feet. The impact was so great that her head went flying off! It didn't stop soaring through the air until it collided with the scoreboard, breaking it and sending electrical sparks flying everywhere.

'HEY!' Neptune yelled. 'You'll have to pay for that, you know.'

Perhaps it was a small time save, but it was just long enough for SpongeBob to get an idea.

'I've got it!' He said. 'Robot Sandy keeps saying stuff that the real Sandy has said. And, she got angry when Patrick insulted Texas, just like the real Sandy would!'

'Fantastic.' Squidward said. 'WHAT IS YOUR POINT?!'

'She's a lot like the real Sandy, right? So to beat her, we just need to exploit the real Sandy's weaknesses!'

'Well that's great. WHAT WEAKNESSES?! That squirrel is invincible!'

'Not quite.' SpongeBob said with a grin. 'She's got one really, really BIG weakness. All I need to do is-'

Robot Sandy's electrified head finally dropped down from the scoreboard and back down to the floor, the glass chipping only a little as it landed. The robotic squirrel fumbled around aimlessly until she could put it back in its rightful place. Once her sight returned to her, her red eyes focused directly on SpongeBob and Patrick.

'WHICH ONE OF YA FELLERS IS THA REAL DIRTY DAN?'

Just a minute ago, the question would've left SpongeBob with jitters in his knees. Seeing his best friend come to his rescue, however, fuelled something inside the cubic sponge.

'I am!' He responded with determination. 'I'm Dirty Dan, and you'll have to shake off my pal Pinhead Larry ta get to me!'

'I thought I was Dirty Dan.' Patrick said.

'We don't have time to argue about this, Pinhead Larry. I have to go find Sandy's greatest weakness!'

Leaving his friend to ponder what the heck was going on, SpongeBob ran to the edge of the ring, getting as close to the judges as his malleable body could possibly stretch.

'Uh, dude, what are you-?' Triton tried to ask before getting interrupted.

'Am I allowed to duck out to get something to help us beat Robot Sandy, or is that illegal?' SpongeBob asked.

The judges looked at each other, and conversed among themselves in whispers. After a quick discussion, Amphitrite turned back to SpongeBob with a smile.

'We have come to the conclusion that anything goes, granted you are back in ten minutes.' She said. 'If you are not back within ten minutes, it will be assumed that you forfeited the match.'

'That's great! So I'll just be-'

'SPOOOONGEBOOOOOB!' Patrick screamed, before SpongeBob heard another crash; Robot Sandy must've struck another blow against him.

Suddenly, he felt his square behind being squeezed by a big metallic hand. Robot Sandy yanked him closer to her, snapping his body back into place. She held him tight in her grasp and lifted him up, her evil red eyes peering right into his soul.

'I WARNED YA, DIRTY DAN! NOW, YOU'VE JUST CROSSED THE BORDER INTO HURTVILLE!'

He gulped; he didn't want to even begin to imagine what kind of place 'Hurtville' would've been like.

'Uh, guys, HEEELP!'

Patrick heard his friend's request for help and saw his distress, but could do nothing but stand on his hands and knees while breathing heavily. Trying to hold that robot back took up most of his energy.

'I'll be... right over... in a few hours...'

Squidward, who I swear to you was still in this scene, had been watching the whole thing. He didn't know why, but seeing his idiot neighbours struggle scared him. Maybe it was because Robot Sandy would attack him next, or maybe - just maybe - he felt worried about them. He did not wish to entertain that latter option, but either way he was terrified. Still, he took a deep breath, and threw himself over the ropes with nary a plan in his head.

'Hey! Over here ya thick-headed urchin!'

'And it looks like the octopus has finally joined the match for real!' Mindy said.

Robot Sandy responded to his voice in an instant, and focused her glowing eyes on him. The moment she saw him, he shuddered and regretted all life decisions once again.

'U-Uh, yeah you!' He said, pointing at the robot. 'I'm gonna, um, do some kay-ray-tah or whatever SpongeBob calls it. Or something. I-I learnt you know!'

'I DON'T KNOW, SPONGEBOB. WITH THE RUBBERY ARMS AND DOUGHINESS IN THIS AREA,' She pointed to his guts as she said this. 'WE OBVIOUSLY-'

'HEY! I didn't appreciate those words when it came from the real deal, and I'm not taking them from you either!'

'RUN, SQUIDWARD!' SpongeBob yelled. 'YOUR BELT ONLY WENT UP TO BASIC COMPETENCE!'

Even though Robot Sandy's exterior seemed more benevolent, her programming said the same thing - exterminate. With the sea sponge in her hand, she began to approach him. The petrified octopus put up his arms and backed away, his sweat already forming a puddle on the ground.

'SQUIDWARD TENTACLES, I TOLD YA AT THA BEGINNING THAT KARATE AIN'T FER REVENGE! SORRY SQUIDWARD. AS OF NOW, I AIN'T YOUR SENSEI NO MORE!'

'N-Now hang on…' Squidward said with a gulp. 'I-If karate is only for self-defence and fun, then I-I think you oughta listen to your own rule and not beat the life outta me?'

'WELL THINK AGAIN!'

It took that moment for Squidward to realise the trouble he was in. In mere moments, his guts would be splattered across the floor. He would get chomped into pieces. The lives of everyone around him would be emptier without him to...

'AAAAAHH-AAH!' He unleashed an impressive scream.

'Is he...? Ew!' Mindy said, wincing.

Triton winced too. 'Whoa. It's even grosser in person.'

In his terror, his survival instinct had kicked in. Without him really even noticing, ink had sprayed from his body in an act of self-defence, and by acciden... uh, totally on purpose, the ink hit her right in the helmet.

'And the ink makes a direct hit!' Amphitrite announced. 'With her sight all clouded up by octopus ink, Robot Sandy has been totally blinded!'

The ink covered her helmet, blinding her completely as her only optical receptors were in her eyes. Stumbling around like a headless sea-chicken, she dropped SpongeBob. He landed on his face, of course, but got back up quickly.

'Good job, Squidward!' He said, giving a thumbs up.

Squidward smirked. 'It was a good job, wasn't it?' He frowned. 'What, just one thumbs up this time?'

'Now you and Pat just have to distract Robot Sandy while I go get help!'

SpongeBob vaulted over the ropes and ran for the exit. Squidward watched him, praying to the judges before him that he would return. Yes, he was seriously praying for SpongeBob to come back. What a crazy day this had been.

'Wait, how am I supposed to...?!' He tried to ask, before realising the kid was gone. 'Sure, just leave me.'

'I'm back, Squidward!'

'WAAHHH!'

That yell unfortunately did not come from SpongeBob, but instead from Patrick. The sea star stood right behind him with a dopey smile, blissfully unaware of the triple heart attack he just gave Squidward.

'Well, great.' The octopus muttered. 'At least I have one meat shield.'

'Don't worry!' Patrick said. 'I know my best friend well - I'm pretty sure - and I know that he wouldn't just leave us to die!'

Squidward wanted to disagree, as his mind was practically programmed to do so, but he knew he couldn't. Last time he thought the porous imbecile would abandon them, said imbecile returned with an acorn robot monster thing. If you didn't see that episode, it was a long story.

'Well, we got ten minutes.' He said, looking at an imaginary watch. 'But since SpongeBob has an uncanny ability to seemingly teleport right behind me, I think we just have to last a few minutes max.'

They looked towards Robot Sandy, who still stumbled around blinded by the ink.

'How do you do that, anyway?' Patrick asked.

'Do... what?' Squidward responded.

'You know, that... ink thing. How do you do it?'

'I...' He looked down his body. '... don't know. It just kinda happens. It's an octopus thing.'

*CRA-ACK*

'AND I DON'T NEED THIS HELMET EITHER!'

That, my friends, was the sound of glass shattering. Robot Sandy, in desperate need of sight, had taken her inked helmet off and thrown it to the ground. Her red eyes focused back on the boys.

'Well, that's one way to solve that problem!' Mindy said. 'Looks like Sandy has got her sight back!'

Patrick screamed. 'NOOOO, Robot Sandy! You'll drown without your helmet! I'll get the pickle jar!'

*SLAP* That, my friends, was the sound of Squidward's hand making quick contact with his forehead.

'She's a robot, Patrick.' He said. 'So... SHE DOESN'T HAVE LUNGS!'

Now that her face was once again visible, her emotionless glare from before had transformed into an evil smirk. Before, she seemed like nothing more than a robot doing as it was programmed to do. This glare, however, had that 'excited to murder everything' look to it. How that was even possible, our heroes didn't care to find out.

'LET'S GO, YA BAG OF SHELLS! I WANT YA JUMPIN' LIKE HOT GREASE ON A SKILLET!'

Squidward struggled to put up a faux smile. 'W-Wait, Ms Cheeks. Uh... a-a friend of ours is a l-little late. We can't start the fun without him, c-can we?'

'ONE BLAST OF THIS MOLECULAR SEPARATOR RAY AND YER'LL BE SEPARATED FER GOOD!'

Patrick hesitantly put his hand up. 'Is that bad?'

Robot Sandy emitted a sound shocking similar to an evil laugh. 'ONLY IF YA CONSIDER BEIN' CONSUMED IN A GIANT FIREBALL 'BAD'!'

A single thought rushed through Squidward's mind, and possibly Patrick's too if he had much of a mind. That single thought was one thing the octopus never thought he would have until long after the day he perished.

SpongeBob... GET BACK HERE AS SOON AS POSSIBLE!

Robot Sandy took a single step towards maiming our remaining heroes...

*CRASH*

'MY OTHER LEG!'

... before the other entrance to the Poseidome had been reduced to rubble.

'Can we be more careful?!' Amphitrite yelled, tapping her fingers on the table. 'We are yet to get this place insured!'

It even managed to attract Robot Sandy's attention. The dust slowly dissipated, showing that a certain sponge had returned but rode on something.

'Did anyone-?' SpongeBob began to announce, before he fell into a horrid coughing fit from the dust. 'Where were we? Oh yeah. Did anyone order the jumbo size?' He said with a grin.

Whatever SpongeBob rode on, it was big...

Hairy...

And pink! (And it wasn't Patrick's belly button)

All three judges, alongside Squidward and Patrick, simply stared at his mount with shock and mouths wide open. The crowd stood in stunned silence.

'Everyone,' SpongeBob continued. 'Say hello to the Alaskan. Bull. WORM!'

The gigantic worm stood in the Poseidome's corner, breathing heavily while its slobber pooled on the floor. Much to the disgust of many people in the crowd. The crowd of which has gotten quite a bit smaller after this worm showed up.

'Wow!' Mindy said. 'He managed to tame an Alaskan Bull Worm. Those giant worms eat everything and anything in their path!'

'Dude, that is gnarly!' Triton cried. 'Those pests are nearly as bad as the Kraken and her child combined!'

'Son…' Neptune muttered. 'I thought we said not to mention that again. It was not my fault that SpongeBob ended up with my triton.'

Somehow, Robot Sandy recognised it. For one reason or another, memories of that monster had been programmed into her. Memories of running for her life as it chased after her. The evil intent in her metallic face vanished. In its place, was horror.

SpongeBob laughed. 'So, Robo-Sandy, you scared?'

'CAN WE TALK ABOUT THIS ANOTHER TIME?' She responded, slowly backing away.

'Com'on, did you think you could beat us?'

She stomped the floor. 'OKAY! YA WERE RIGHT, AND I WAS WRONG. I WAS WRONG, WRONG, WRONG, WRONG, WRONG! ARE YA HAPPY NOW?'

'STOP TAUNTING HER AND DO SOMETHING!' Squidward screamed.

SpongeBob's triumphant grin grew, and with that he booted the Bull Worm like it was a horse. It looked up to him with puppy dog eyes.

'Alright, move in girl.'

Whatever he did to tame the giant worm, it worked wonders. It did just as it was ordered, slithering from the corner straight into the ring. It managed to irritate Amphitrite further by wrecking the place more. The Bull Worm lifted its head up as if it was a cobra, staring down the giant robotic squirrel who now seemed as insignificant as Plankton. In her pathetic attempt to flee, she just ended up tripping over herself and fell over backwards.

'WOO-HOO!' Patrick cheered. 'Go SpongeBob!'

Squidward was surprised that he was surprised. This seemed relatively normal compared to the other weird stuff that sponge did.

SpongeBob stroked its smooth skin. 'It's amazing who or what you can befriend with just the greasy goodness of a Krabby Patty.' He leaned over to look it in the eye. 'Alright girl, I hope you like the taste of metal. Go for the kiiiilllll!'

The Bull Worm lurched down with its mouth wide open. Robot Sandy turned herself over, but all she accomplished was getting her tail up. The worm grabbed her tail in its teeth, and lifted her into the air. The sight of her flailing about helplessly prompted most of the audience to laugh at her. The worm slobber messing with her electronics didn't help her at all.

'L-L-LINING UP FER THA CHUM-M BBBUCKET? N-NOW, I KN0W EVERYONE'S GOT-T-T-A HOLE IN TH3IR SCREEN DOOOOOOOOOOOOR.'

Thanks to the worm drool in her metallic body, her systems were spitting out her programmed quotes at total random.

'Oooh, now that's embarrassing.' Amphitrite said. 'The robot that was so menacing and terrifying before has now been reduced to a squirming puppy held by the neck!'

After a few seconds, the squirming ceased as the admission of defeat hit Robot Sandy like a pie bomb to the face.

'Aw, come on dude.' Triton said with a grin. 'Now that's just cruel.'

'I guess this Alaskan Bull Worm was never told not to play with her food.' Mindy added, to which her brother chuckled.

SpongeBob let the moment sink in for a little bit before continuing.

'That's a good girl. You're a good girl! But I think it's about time you... drop it.'

The Bull Worm sunk its teeth into her tail, chomping it clean off. She plummeted out of the air, doing nothing as she accepted her fate.

'A-A-AND YA W3RN'T AF-F-FECTED BECAUSSSSE YER A- YER A- YER A- COMPUUUUUUU-'

*CRASH*

She slammed into the ground, and fell apart at the nuts and bolts! Her head bounced away from her mangled body, and had only enough energy to spout two more words.

'G-G-G-G-GAL PALS!'

A few seconds of silence passed...

'And the winner is... SPONGEBOB AND HIS MISFIT FRIENDS!' Amphitrite announced.

And the crowd couldn't cheer any louder!

'Congratulations, dude!' Triton said, clapping his hands.

Patrick ran around cheering for his best friend, just barely comprehending everything that just happened. Squidward, on the other fin, was totally speechless from the awe. SpongeBob only had a moment to let the glory sink in, for he noticed something among the steel wreckage. Whatever it was, it was white with a brown furry tail.

'Oh my gosh!' He yelled.

No one heard him underneath the roaring crowd, not even himself.

He spoke to the Bull Worm again. 'Lower me back down, girl.'

It did as it was gently ordered, and lowered its head to the ground. SpongeBob slid down its side, landed with a small squeaking sound, and rushed over to the wreckage. There, he found that his assumption was correct.

'Sandy? Sandy!'

Sandy, regular organic Sandy, lay in the rubble of her robotic counterpart; still breathing, thank Neptune, but totally unconscious.

'Patrick, Squidward, I found Sandy!'

His yell just barely got through the crowd to his friends. Both of them - Patrick out of concern and Squidward out of not having anything better to do - ran to his side to see what he said was true.

'Oh no, Sandy!' Patrick cried. 'The robot ate her and now she's dead!'

'Calm down Patrick.' Squidward said, as calmly as possible even if rage laced his words. 'She's just unconscious. You know, asleep.'

'Oh.' He waited. 'WAKE UP SANDY!'

Squidward jumped and shuddered. 'GAAAH! That's not gonna help!'

SpongeBob zoned them out, not intentionally so but because all his attention had landed on his unconscious friend.

'Ohhh...' She groaned.

'Sandy?!'

Her eyes opened slowly. The sensation she felt was odd, to say the least. It was like your entire body aching but you felt no real pain, or being tied down but there was no rope that you could see. The cheering crowd overwhelmed her, but she only cared about focusing on the three blurs that stood above her.

'Sandy, are you okay?'

She recognised the voice, and the enthusiasm that came with that voice ended up helping her return to reality.

'SpongeBob...?'

He smiled. 'Yes! It's me, SpongeBob! And Patrick and Squidward too. We were so worried about you!'

'I wasn't. OW! Patri-!'

'Hey! Don't say that about my best friend's friend.'

Sandy felt relief, hearing the voices of her other team mates. The blurs slowly sharpened, and she could identify the shapes in front of her. SpongeBob, Patrick, Squidward... wait, what was that big pink thing behind them?

'How long until she wakes up?' Squidward asked.

'Give her time.' SpongeBob said. 'We have no idea what she's been through.

Oh no. She recognised that big, hairy, and pink thing staring her down.

'Hiiii!' It greeted, in a deep masculine voice.

'AAAHHHHH!' She screamed. 'Alaskan Bull Worm! RUN FER YOUR LIFE!'

In complete panic, she sprung to her feet, and leapt over the arena's rope walls. Her foot got caught on one of the ropes, and she fell flat on her face.

'I gave her time.' Squidward said. 'Now she's up. Can we go now?'

SpongeBob turned around and faced the Bull Worm. It looked at him with those cutesy eyes, no matter how threatening its teeth were.

'Thanks for the help, girl!' He said. 'You can go home now.'

He waved goodbye to the worm as it turned around, leaving through a third hole it just created and angering Amphitrite further in the process.

'What did I just say five minutes ago?!' The queen yelled.

'Goodbye!' SpongeBob said. 'I'll babysit your babies after they hatch!'

Sandy, having unhooked herself from the ropes successfully, saw the Bull Worm slithering away on command. She winced just looking at the darn thing, and climbed back over the ropes to join her team.

'Sandy!' SpongeBob cried before hugging her. 'You're okay! What were you doing inside that robot?'

Sandy was taken a little aback by the hug, but let him do it. 'Ta tell ya tha truth, I dunno. After I turned tha reflector tha right way, everything went black and-'

She got cut off by King Neptune suddenly swimming back into the ring. As he did, the crowd began leaving their seats and walked towards the merchandising store his family had just opened.

'Congratulations!' He announced, motioning towards the scrap heap. 'You have successfully destroyed the robot that had been wreaking havoc in our home, and for that my family and I are forever thankful. And your reward for this deed is not only five percent royalties on all the merchandising we sell, but also a free ride home!'

'And,' Mindy said. 'A gift certificate for 5 dollars and 32 cents to Dean's Little Shop of Dried Fish Flakes and Flowers!'

Triton crossed his arms. 'I still think that's a totally lame gift. But I guess a sweet hot rod would be a pretty bad reward for someone who doesn't have a boating licence yet.'

Pointing his trident at one of the few patches of clear floor, Neptune zapped the spot and materialised a bus. A nice little gift to be sure... if Neptune weren't poking them into the bus with his trident.

'Hey, watch where you're poking that thing!' Squidward complained. 'My tentacles are very sensitive.'

No matter how they were put on the bus, our heroes were glad to be heading home.


Planktron could not express fear nearly as well as his organic counterpart could. That being said, just because he didn't express it, it didn't mean that he couldn't feel it. And he was practically shaking hard enough to loosen some screws. He trembled under the message on the screen.

SANDY GREASE DEMOLISHED. REPLACEMENT PLAN FAILED.

He emitted a sound quite similar to a gulp, for he knew exactly what was to happen.

'PLAAANKTROOON!'

He gulped again. His boss's voice boomed through a speaker on his antenna, almost loudly enough to shatter his auditory receptors. Realising what would happen if he didn't respond to her right away, he dashed out of his surveillance room and into the one right next to it. It was much more elaborate than his own, having a screen for just about every single locale in the town and not too far beyond.

'Boss,' He said, floating closer to the screens and his boss. 'I believe you are aware of what happened to Sandy Grease.'

When she slammed her fist into the keyboard and turned around to face him, Planktron knew he was in gigantic trouble. If the glare upon her screen didn't make it obvious enough.

'Ugh, it seems my plan does have something in common with those of my husband... that sponge kid is going to ruin it!' Karen yelled as the realisation hit her, slamming her fist a second time. 'All of my planning is going down the toilet, because a sea sponge managed to tame an omnivorous worm that devours literally everything!'

Karen sighed - which shifted into a groan - and placed her palm onto her screen. She had to tell herself not to be like her husband; more specifically, not let rage cloud her judgement.

'I am sorry, my computer boss.' Planktron said. 'It appears we won't be able to engage phase two of the plan.'

The computer wife chuckled. 'You really think I would give up that easily? Please. Your organic counterpart is far more stubborn. I've planned this whole thing for too long to let it all fail now. Tell me - how's the Bus Plan going?'

'I'm glad you asked.'

He floated over to another screen, this one from the POV of one of her robot goons. The camera stood behind a steering wheel, and out the windshield you could see a straight road.

'As RoSpot has relayed to me,' He continued. 'The bus that SpongeBob and his friends are on has been successfully hijacked, and they have not noticed. Even King Neptune is unaware that he has inadvertently led to their demise.'

'That's very good news.' Karen said with a grin. 'Even if they survive the crash, there's no way they'll get out of Rock Bottom. Still, it doesn't hurt to have back-up plans.'

If computers could feel delirious under normal circumstances, she would be swimming in that sensation. Indulging in the delightful satisfaction she got from knowing that nothing could go wrong now. So much so that, for the first time in quite a while, she burst into an evil laugh.

'HA HA HA HA HAAAA!'

Her evil laugh sounded a lot like Plankton's, appropriately enough, but with more reverb.

'If everything goes to plan, then finally... THE ROBOTS SHALL RULE!'

'Are you sure you are nothing like your husband?' Planktron asked.

She glared at him. 'Don't push your luck. You're on thin ice already.'


SpongeBob had an odd and unpleasant feeling in the pit of his stomach. Something about this bus trip didn't feel right. For one, it was going waaay too fast. And this certainly wasn't the way back home.

'I can't wait to be done with this.' Squidward said, leaning back in his seat. 'We dealt with a giant robot, and now we can relax.'

'Uh, Squidward,' Sandy said. 'Ya do realise there's probably a lot more trouble out there, right? If there's an evil robotic me, who's ta say there isn't one'a you?'

'I just wanna sit here in denial for a moment, Sandy.'

Not to mention the fact that the bus driver seemed a lot more… robotic than usual. SpongeBob couldn't remember the last time that Nathaniel's head was so shiny. And grey. And loaded with nuts and bolts.

'WAIT!' He screamed, suddenly enough to make his three friends flinch. 'Our bus driver's a robot!'

Seeing as its cover had been blown, the hammer-less Ham-Mer who had been driving grinned at them and jumped out of the nearest window. With the steering wheel too.

'It's a trap!' SpongeBob yelled.

Sandy rushed to the front of the bus while the boys began to panic. Unfortunately, she found that the brake was just as broken as the steering wheel. And the bus wouldn't slow down for a moment. It was like that movie… 'The Bus That Couldn't Slow Down'. Wait, wrong cartoon.

'Oh no…' Squidward muttered, wrapping himself up in his own tentacles. 'We're all gonna die in a horrific bus crash!'

Patrick wasn't freaking out quite as much as the others, and his attention fell on a sign that had passed them in a split second. Despite only seeing it for a moment, he managed to read it. Because his reading skills have a tendency to fluctuate.

'Uh, SpongeBob.' He said. 'We're going to 'Leaving Bikini Bottom' again.'

Sandy managed to give him a deadpanned look through her fear. 'Patrick, that isn't how those signs are supposed ta be read.'

This situation was very familiar to SpongeBob. It may have happened only once before, but he could remember it so well as if happened yesterday.

'WE'RE GOING TO ROCK BOTTOM?!'

Author Notes - Alright, so there's a lot to unpack here. So, as I'm sure you've figured out, the real reason why I revealed Planktron so soon was because I actually had another plot twist up my sleeve, one I made up myself that wasn't from the game itself.

The idea of Karen being the true villain behind it all came from a few things. A big piece of inspiration was the SpongeBob Musical, that depicted her as being just as villainous as Plankton. If not more so, since it was HER idea to essentially murder SpongeBob. And this is a game where the primary villains consisted entirely of robots. It seemed almost criminal that Karen doesn't appear in the game at all. If you're wondering how this all fits together, seeing as this was clearly (and supposedly) Plankton's plan from the beginning, I will explain that later on.

Also she's my favourite character, and I wanted to give her something epic to do.