Chapter 35: Hanabi

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Hanabi waved half-heartedly as she parted from Sakura as they both went their separate ways after being at a restaurant. That night, the place had been filled with Shinobis and coworkers who encouraged them to stay when it was obvious they should go as tomorrow was her sister's big event.

The sky was pitch black with stars, the moon slightly hidden behind a cloud, as Hanabi started walking home in no hurry. She hadn't meant to stay out for so long, but it had helped to hear Sakura venting the whole night.

The more Sakura spoke about the conflict, Hanabi began to pick up on hints of feelings, which reflected how Hanabi had also felt. She had stopped listening to Sakura half-way through the night, as she found herself unable to validate her own feelings of anger if her feelings just stemmed from something so petty and also second-hand anger.

She was a Hyuga for Kami's sake. Jealousy was frowned upon because they were taught to take anything they want, as inaction was looked down upon. Though, Hanabi is sure those words of wisdom didn't apply to the situation.

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Hanabi walked past a 24-hour market and her eyes caught the bright color of red, from a window. She paused, and turned to see a display of shiny stacked tomatoes among their produce set. She walked across the street and entered the store just to browse for a moment.

She picked up a tomato and looked at it. No matter how gross she believed the fruit to be, she put it inside the basket she had picked up on impulse.

When she exited the market, with a warm can of tea in her hand, Hanabi wondered if Sasuke was stuck inside his head right now? He must be, as Naruto and Lord Kakashi had ways of making anyone feel bad when they didn't hold up to expectations.

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Sasuke had just finished packing for his trip after eating ramen with Naruto, who wouldn't stop badgering him about self-love, self-respect, and lastly bro-codes which Sasuke was pretty sure had been made up at the spot. The bell to his home rang just minutes after Naruto had just entered the portal, which closed behind him.

Sasuke set his travel bag down on a counter and glanced at the microwave's clock. He was surprised, to say the least, to find it was Hanabi on the other side. Sasuke looked past her shoulder, half expecting Sakura, or Konohamaru to be there behind her. He had hoped that would be the case, as it had been 12 am. What was she doing there?

Hanabi passed him a small tote bag. He looked inside and took a tomato straight out of it. His somber expression was gone when he took a bite, chuckling at her expression of disapproval. He closed the door when she walked past him and left her by the entrance while she took off her shoes, hung her purse and cloak.

They had split apart once they walked further inside his house. Hanabi watched him from the sofa, as he entered the kitchen to refrigerate the tomatoes.

"Hanabi," It's not that he didn't appreciate her checking in on him, bringing comfort fruits, but, "You shouldn't be here by yourself." He looked outside the window, wondering if maybe there was an Anbu waiting outside.

'Why? It's just you, senpai. Anyways, Sakura-sensei asked me not to heal you. But if you show up at the event looking beat up... ' She didn't need to finish as he understood. Everyone was going to be there, including the council and elders. He didn't take notice of how Hanabi had danced around the subject of her sister's wedding.

"Hn, then I won't tell Sakura that you betrayed her wish." He said, offering his hospitality, for which she declined. Sasuke cut across the room, with another tomato wrapped in a papertowel.

He tossed a throw pillow out of the way, and to the side to make space right next to her. The furniture sank as he took a seat, his body turned to her, their legs brushing.

As Hanabi inspected the wound. She could tell he had healed it and treated it somewhat, but bruises were still apparent, as healing wasn't his strongest suit as he wasn't able to remove bruises or scars.

"What's the damage? Do you think I will have to use a concealer technique?" He asked her, not waiting for her assessment.

'No. You'll be fine.' She sighed inwardly. 'I also think of how lucky you are that at least you get to travel and get away from this,'

"It's not too late to change your mind and join us on our trip," Sasuke eyed her reaction, while still biting down on the tomato. She seemed to honestly consider it.

Hanabi quickly quieted the thought that was about to rise, having been used to needing her sister's permission all her life. She was technically a lot freer, to go where she wished, with her sister's attention no longer on her.

But did Hanabi want to go?

She had initially wanted to stay and help take care of the clan, but the elders instead have taken to fill her schedule with mundane things which were not related to politics, all because she had lost her voice.

'Why do you want me to come along so badly?' Hanabi asked.

Sasuke knew she was overstating the question, so he decided his answer would be just as exaggerated.

"I don't think Sakura can handle being the third wheel if it's just the three of us. It'll be more interesting with you there." Even through his expressionless face, Hanabi could discern his lighthearted attempt at making them both smile.

'Senpai, I think you're describing a double date.' She replied, jokingly, as she went on to heal him. He didn't think anything of her comment, as he knows her to sometimes say strange things that make no sense to him.

After finishing the tomato, he touched the corner of his mouth to see if he had anything on his lips. He then glanced past her, his eyes not focused on anything particular as she faced him, her hands hovering over his bruise. He spread out and got more comfortable, his eyes eventually closing.

Argh, this was ridiculous. The racing speed at which Hanabi's heart suddenly pulses when she was around Sasuke; she knew it was that kind of infatuation her older sister had always described. But how can she nip it in the bud? Getting turned down, she figured, must be better than agonizing and pinning after him for the rest of her life. She was not going to chase anyone. She had to move on.

Wait, she was kidding! Why was her body suddenly moving?

Sasuke's eyes opened back up as if sensing a shift in intent as she moved, her knee pressed into the sofa to meet his height. When her hands were on his shoulder, a thumping breached her throat as she dipped her head, her hair creating a curtain around herself as she pressed her forehead against his, all of her feelings condensed into that one action she wished he understood.

The silence that followed, if Hanabi could speak, she would break it, by saying something to take it all back.

Sasuke pulled away to look at her, moving her long brown hair out of the way, and fixing it behind her ear, looking straight into her eyes.

"If I entertain something like this right now, it would all be for the wrong reasons," Sasuke searched her eyes to see if she understood that they shouldn't, for the same reason they became acquaintances, and then friends in the first place. And about Konohamaru?

She felt numb after coming down from the adrenaline that had just passed from her confession to his rejection. She knew too well it was all bad timing, but at least it was done, and she could move on.

Then, misery and anxiety coiled in place of her heart. The thought that she had just tried to take advantage of Sasuke while he was feeling at his lowest… She must be a horrible person. Hanabi used to think she was good in the way that counts, but now, it was impossible to tell if it was closure she craved at the time, or degradation, as Sasuke would never look at her that way.

Hanabi let out a muted sigh and pushed against Sasuke's shoulder to straighten herself back on her side of the sofa, fixing her hair behind her. There was nothing much to do but collect her stuff and leave before emotions escapes. It wasn't easy to maintain her stoic mask since it begun to crack.

She got up, then glanced at him with curious neutrality when his hand reached out just as she moved to leave. Hanabi felt confused by the contradicting actions coming from him, and didn't stop to ask herself if his kindness would end up doing more harm than good in the long run. When he reeled her back into his personal space, she looked away, unsure, as he thumbed her cheek.

"Did you have a fight with Konohamaru?" Is that why she was acting out? Sasuke hadn't realized at the time he had naturally assume Hanabi wanted to use him too, somehow.

She looked elsewhere and inwardly scoff, confused by his question. In order to even have a fight, there would have to be some form of misunderstanding in communication.

'I haven't had a real conversation with him ever since I lost my voice. I only ever liked you.'

Sasuke took a moment to decipher her gesture, when she used the sign for 'like'. His inner demon mocked his weakness at the time for not turning her away right then. He decided he would call himself out on this later, and reached out to live in the moment, seeking comfort that food alone couldn't satiate. Hanabi was pulled into the space between him as he wrapped an arm around her waist. Then she was back on the sofa, where gravity didn't exist. When he kissed her, her head started to spin, or perhaps it was the room; The feeling went on ceaselessly, ultimately leaving her in a dreamlike state because this couldn't be happening. Any rational questions were inconsequential the moment his kisses became less chaste. She wished to tell him against his breath, and in between kisses, to never stop as a warmth had spread to many places, lighting up her world.

Hanabi leaned back further as his weight was on her, until she found herself laying on her back. Her fingers kept his hair in place, and away from tickling her face while they kissed. She started to almost laugh when he did weird things like biting her lips. But then his hand moved to the hem of her skirt, and up her thighs. A shiver crept down Hanabi's spine when hearing his voice asking permission against her lips. Sasuke had never asked anything of her, and now there he was, essentially hinting that he needed her with just his action alone. She let go of his hair, gripping his shoulder tightly, unsure of what to do, all the while keeping any embarrassing noises to herself.

Up until now, Sasuke waited for Hanabi to push him off, block his chakras, and gut him, as though those would probably be things Hinata would do. And when he thought of her, his hand paused, taking him out of the moment. Sasuke removed his hand from inside Hanabi's panties and wide-eyed eyes stared back at him when she noticed his explorations slowly ceased, as his eyes stayed fixed on just looking at her.

He sighed, as he touched Hanabi's cheek tenderly, for he could see how Hinata might feel slighted if she ever finds out about what he had almost done tonight, even though he was not entitled to anyone exclusively. Although his actions had not been inspired by anger, spite, or revenge, against Hinata, nevertheless, it was becoming hard for Sasuke to believe that anything he was doing wouldn't have a wrathful amount of consequences. Hanabi was always her weakness, and he would be the bad guy.

When Sasuke spoke, the meaning and the sense of his words were muddled with vagueness.

"Hanabi. You matter too much."

Hanabi let go of his shoulder.

'That's what I've been told before, but I have yet to know what that even means coming from you.'

"It means you deserve a gentleman. Not someone that would take advantage of your feelings and kindness." He said, seriously, while looking down at her.

'I am the one taking advantage of you, senpai.' She expressed, her hand moving to touch his face.

Sasuke half chuckled.

"I wish that were the case, but you never once tried to stop me. Now, who's the one being taken advantage of, if you're just going to go along with anything I do just because you like me?"

Hanabi's expression changed, ever so subtly, as his words reached her. Still, his slight movements against hers reminded her that he had yet to move away and that he still wanted something from her. It almost made her want to try and reach him with her feelings, one more time. She embraced him tightly, as though she'd done this many times before.

Somehow, it felt comforting, and that surprised him. The feelings she evoked, like how her hug radiated warmth inside his chest, felt… nice. The revelation only created confusion, as Sasuke had believed Hinata was the only person who had the power to give life to the creatures of spring and summer. But how wrong he had been. Yet when he thought of her, he also remembered all their exhausting battles, chase, and mind games from both sides. He could see why some people, or even strangers, had believed he had no love for himself or self-respect.

He pulled away from the hug, and onyx eyes were on Hanabi, again. There was just no way he could do this to Hanabi. If he were to seriously consider pursuing something like this, it had to be done properly, especially because of who she was.

"Sorry. Right now, it's just not a good time."

Hanabi figured that was his way of finally just rejecting her. However, Sasuke was not the kind to spare people's feelings, thus Hanabi had come to believe he had meant what he said. Did that mean she should try again later?

Her fingers traced his lips, because it would probably be the last time she'll be allowed to do this, as she doesn't know if she got the patience to wait. She wanted him to be hers. Right now. When he snatched her hand and placed it over his heart, Hanabi caught herself just then, being immature, as she remembered the grief inside his heart.

Suddenly, Hanabi thought that perhaps she should wait for him after all, since she believed Sasuke was being the gentleman he had described.

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Since then, Hanabi's world has become slow-paced.

Even as she lay asleep inside her room, the dreams stretched like weeks as she waited for the morning sun to come. That same morning, however, dragged on as she waited for the afternoon to roll by just to see him again, at her sister's wedding.

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Before you guys murder me, I want a happy ending for almost everyone. This chapter was mainly about Sasuke accepting he can be happy with someone else (though it doesn't even have to be Hanabi), and awknowledging that he was ready to move on because what he has with Hinata is toxic for him and everyone else, since he had been willing to be the other guy, caving in multiple times to Hinata's wants, which resulted in Hinata getting closer and closer, in each time, to cheating (no thanks to my stupid writing).

Why Hanabi? Chapter 2, 13, 16, 19, 20, 23, 25, 29, 30, 33, had hints and interactions between Hanabi/Sasuke becoming aware of one another through either dialogue, friends, family, group-events, politics, etc, so seeds were planted, and I've been trying to make her grow up a little.

I read the comment, and thought about a HinaxSasu alternative ending, just for you. I have an idea of how I could write something like that with the least amount of drama involved, or people getting hurt. But it may be challenging (to me) to be honest because I love drama, and apparently writing infidelity.