Coach Charlotte blows the whistle, signaling the end of cheer practice.

"Good work, ladies!" She announces, tucking her clipboard into her pouch. "Now hit the showers. Don't forget, soccer game is tomorrow, spring season debut, nine o'clock AM sharp. I wanna see some real cheer on the field, got it?"

The pom-pommed females moan out their 'yes coach'es before making their way to the female locker room. They pick up where they left off in terms of gossip from the stretch circle.

"Oh my god, Coach Charlotte is trying to kill us." Penny whines.

Mari sighs. "She's still salty Hafsa quit. No more golden child."

With a resigned eyeroll, the cockatiel concedes. "I mean, did you see that scar? Imagine getting bitten by a tiger."

"Speaking of," Marisol says, struggling to get her shirt over her labyrinthian neck. "A carnie got in a fight with one of those DAVID protestors. A fox, Herman or Horowitz or something."

"Yeah, the senior, right?" Kiki nods. "Did he win?"

"Did a fox win against a fifty kilogram buffalo?" The flamingo repeats, snorting. "No, he got his shit kicked in. He looks like those pelt scarves they show us in SAD."

"Serves him right, if you ask me." Poppy shrugs. "Who picks a fight with a buffalo?"

Kiki flares up at this remark. "Well, if the buffalo was yelling outside of my dorm every day, I'd be inclined to. Oh wait, they do yell outside my dorm every day."

"Yeesh, sorry I asked."

Kristen speaks up from the other row of lockers. "DAVID's captain or whatever is running for vice, right? Big rhino?"

"Yeah, Ezekiel." Mari's voice joins in. "He looks like a total psycho. I defo won't vote for his ugly ass."

Penny rushes to give the lemur a pinch on her ringed tail. "Don't be mean to Zekey! He's super nice! He, like, always opens the door for me and Piper and yells at males who annoy us ."

"He's nice to herbies, sure…" Kiki rolls her eyes. "But to carnies like me, I bet he wouldn't hesitate to rip out all our teeth."

"He just wants to make campus safer." Poppy argues.

The black cat flattens her ears in disbelief. "Please don't tell me you're gonna vote for that creep! Think about what he's gonna do to carnie students!"

"Oh please, it's not like he's gonna throw you out. Student council can't actually change school rules."

Kristen peeks over the lockers. "Didn't the student council get rid of school uniforms, though? They organized like… a whole movement."

"Yeah!" Kiki gives an approving glance at her panda friend before returning her attention to the Rex rabbit. "He's basically already doing it with DAVID. You'd just be giving him more power!"

"It's not about power!" Poppy snaps back, a bit harsher than anyone was expecting. "It's about making herbies feel safe!"

The locker room goes quiet in an instant.

The remaining females quietly tiptoe around the arguing pair, huddling over each other like frightened children witnessing their parents fight.

"Safe… from carnies like me?" Kiki growls.

The rabbit huffs. "Ugh, it's not like that! Don't make me sound like a bigot. It's just… some herbies have been feeling… on edge ever since last year. Carnies look at them different now. And they know that not all carnies are like that - hell, even most carnies - but they're still scared, and everyone is really tense and angry and it's not fair to most herbies because they just want to have a normal school life but everywhere they go all they can see is carnies staring at them and they're just afraid something really bad is going to happen and they're just really fucking sick and tired of being so terrified all the time!"

Poppy's voice had raised to a passionate shout by the end of her rant. She realizes she's out of breath, and with quivering nose, tries to recompose herself while her stunned opponent stares at her, wordless.

"But it's whatever." She concludes hastily, stuffing her crumpled up cheerleading uniform into her duffel bag. "It would be nice if he adds a curfew or something."

In an instant, she shoves past the other females and sprints out the exit, leaving them choking on her dust and words.

Nervously, the crowd of cheerleaders look back at Kiki. The cat's shoulders tremble as she desperately and unsuccessfully tries to hold back tears of frustration. The others gulp, seeing their fearful faces reflected in the cat's thin ivory fangs, now exposed over her clenched jaw. Like the herbivore before her, she ducks her head down and storms out of the locker room without sparing a glance towards the others.

Seconds which could have passed as hours go by. The remaining cheerleaders awkwardly return to their lockers, silently undressing and redressing, folding and spraying, but none leave once they are done. Freshened and clothed, they just form one last circle and exchange looks ranging from melancholic to panicked.

Kristen is first to break the unbearable silence. "I wish Hafsa was here."

Marisol offers a sympathetic shoulder squeeze. "Girl, I don't think Hafsa could've fixed that."

Penny's brow furrows in confusion. "Should I like… not vote for Zekey then?"

The others groan.


Desmond can feel Eloise's steely glare burning into him from a mile away. He sheepishly approaches the hare, who stands under a lamppost, fuming and twitching in the unsettling way hares are known to do.

"You're late." She spits in a low harsh voice.

"S-sorry." The ram bows, shrinking into himself. Not even a hungry wolf could make him feel as small. "I lost track of time getting these."

Hastily, he whips out a bouquet of daffodils from behind his back and shoves it in her direction. The blossoms seem to wither in shame under Eloise's stare. She scrutinizes the bouquet, not bothering to accept it, and looks at the male holding them for a handful of painful seconds. Finally, a single brow raises. Desmond is unsure if this is a good sign or not.

"Thoughtful." She says, taking the bouquet into her arms. Before Desmond can breathe a sigh of relief, her ears jolt straight up as if to say 'don't relax just yet!'.

"But," she continues. "Unnecessary. Romantic gestures won't be needed in our relationship."

The ram wishes she had told him this before he spent twenty five bucks on those flowers. "A-aren't we dating now?"

"That's somewhat oversimplifying things, but yes, we are." She affirms. "But make no mistake. I have no desire to engage in sappy couples activities. I find them patronizing and infantilizing. I'll forgive you this time since you didn't know any better."

Desmond's eyelid twitches. "So what exactly is the point of dating then?"

"Intelligent conversation. Company. Sex. Things you would want out of a companion."

Her boyfriend gulps. "Let's stick to intelligent conversation for now."

"Fine."

And so, the two begin their walk down the afternoon streets of the city center, hands unlinked. Despite the brain-melting awkwardness Desmond experiences, even he can't help but admire the lovely scenery. The area they are in is always bustling with activity, even more so on a Friday like this one (and very far from any black markets). They pass by stylish cafes, ornate fountains, green parks and beautiful city lights to the tune of car engines and strangers' laughter. The ram had never been fond of busy places, but he's come to love cities, where he can blend in and become one with his environment like a cell in an organism.

However, Eloise's voice interrupts his sightseeing. "Where are we going, precisely?"

"Uh, I thought we could walk around for a bit and then have dinner somewhere nice."

"That will do." The hare gives her bouquet a satisfied stroke. "It will give us plenty of time to discuss your resigning in disgrace."

"I did not 'resign in disgrace.'" Desmond's tone is dipped in sarcasm. "I just couldn't handle being in that situation anymore. It was too painful."

"Causing you to resign in disgrace."

"For wool's sake…"

"I take it your successor will be named shortly." Eloise cocks her head to the side.

"Kind of a dramatic way of putting it but yeah, campaigning season starts Monday."

"Any promising candidates?"

"I know a guy running. A panther." The sheep answers. "It's a long shot but I think he'd do a good job. Better than another certain candidate, at least."

"Hm, you really learned nothing." His girlfriend's tone betrays a certain smugness. "Carnivores vying for power can only lead to trouble. Remember?"

She traces a finger along her facial scar, from the corner of her cheek all the way up her nose and forehead. A cruel tactic, but Desmond still can't help but flinch at the thought of an owl's sharp talons tearing across his face like that.

Nevertheless, he persists. "I remember telling you that you were full of shit. And I stand by that."

"Standing by shit only makes you the one who must clean it, Desmond darling."

Her nonsensical metaphor angers him almost as much as her calling him darling, but an unmistakable sight slaps the comeback right out of his mouth.

An imposing white horn. Attached to that other certain candidate he spoke of not ten seconds ago.

Ezekiel. Speak of the devil.

Desmond scrambles to duck into a nearby crowd, dragging his disgruntled partner with him. Unfortunately, two sets of horns and one set of very long ears do no favors in warding off attention. The rhinoceros catches a glimpse of his iconic piebald wool and a sadistic smirk creeps across his face.

"If it isn't Sheep Desmond!" He calls out. Sheep Desmond audibly groans.

The ungulate tears a path through the stream of animals, trotting up to the couple with thunderous steps. Ducking down to better meet their gaze, he parks himself in front of the distraught herbivores.

"Well I'll be. Evening, Desmond. Happy Friday to you."

"What the hell do you want?" The ram snaps.

"Ouch!" Ezekiel clutches the fabric of his shirt above his heart, trying to stop a nonexistent pain. "Is that any way to greet a classmate?"

Desmond is not moved. "Just because we know each other doesn't mean we have to interact. Ever. Bye."

Hand still around Eloise's wrist, he tries to move past, but the rhino's wall-like physique makes maneuvering around him quite impossible without the latter's consent.

"Up, up, up!" The leather-skinned herbivore tuts. "What's the hurry? You haven't even introduced me to your lovely friend here."

With a dashing smile, Ezekiel extends his thumb and curled index finger towards the hare, in the hopes she would offer her hand out too. She does not; instead she inspects the stranger from top to bottom with her shivering pupils and revolving ears.

"Hare Eloise." She says in a cold voice.

"Sharp eyes you got there." Ezekiel chuckles. "Good trait for a herbie. I gotta say, those daffodils look really nice when a pretty female such as yourself holds 'em."

"By all means, take them." She tosses the bouquet abruptly at the rhino, who flounders to catch them. "My arms were getting tired."

Desmond shudders to think he indirectly bought Ezekiel a bouquet.

"Oh, uh, well, thank you kindly. Looks like I'm getting married next." The rhino scratches his neck, clearly caught off guard. Despite the strange turn of events, the ram secretly delights in his obvious discomfort.

"Who are you?" Eloise demands. Out of nowhere, the situation begins to resemble an interrogation. "What is your relation to Desmond?"

This question seems to put the pep back in Ezekiel's steps. "Glad you asked! The name is Rhinoceros Ezekiel, I'll soon be Desmond's vice president, as well as all of Noah's Arc."

"Like hell you will." The other male barks.

"Then hell's coming real soon for you, bro." The ungulate sneers. "The candidate's are a total wash. That meat-eating bitch even put her little criminal pet up to run. It's pretty sad to think he's the best she can throw at me, but it makes my job even easier."

"Don't. Call her that." Desmond's expression darkens. Even Ezekiel feels something prick at his thick skin.

"Welp, just wish me luck then." He waves off his hostility.

"I hope you fucking lose."

"Ha!" Ezekiel guffaws. "I've always liked your spitfire, Desmond. Isn't he a card, little bunny? "

His eyes suddenly widen, and points at Eloise. "Say, you wouldn't happen be be the little billy goat's sweetheart, now would you?"

Eloise eyes him suspiciously. "I am."

"Wow!" He exclaims, slapping his knee. "I should've known it sooner! What a couple! Those stinkeyes are just made for one another! Wait, don't tell me you're on a date!"

"We'll leave that up to your overflowing imagination." Desmond cuts him off, patience long since burst. "Now if you'll excuse us, we really should be going."

With one final push that Ezekiel doesn't not fight, the ram finally muscles past the horrid rhinoceros, Eloise in tow.

"Y'all have a good one!" He can hear Ezekiel's mocking voice resonate behind him. "TGIF!"

The couple power walk down four blocks in complete silence, Desmond's grip still tightly around the hare's wrist, neither of them saying a word. At long last, once they pass by the exterior of a random bakery, the male relinquishes his grasp allowing Eloise to go free, though he looks anything but relaxed.

Eloise probes at him with her signature keen gaze. "I take it you two aren't on good terms."

Desmond sighs. He hunches over the display window of the bakery, staring blankly at the colorful baked goods, every muscle tensed. "What made you think that?"

"Just my intuition." His partner follows his gaze, joining him in admiring the assortment of pastries, which range from fanned out danishes to piles of macarons.

"He's probably gonna win Vice President. And once he does, he's going to try to expel all of the carnies."

Eloise's lips quiver pensively. "Wish I had thought of that when I was president."

"Eloise!"

"I'm joking." She deadpans. "Mostly."

"Whatever. It's not worth thinking about." Despite his words, he still lingers by the window, unable to take his eyes off of the display.

The hare's petite fingers grab his chin, and redirect his face to face her.

"Eloi—"

She kisses him before he can finish. A proper kiss, lasting four seconds. To his great dismay, Desmond realizes she is an excellent kisser.

When she lets go of him, her face is one of someone who completed their job. With a satisfied huff, she resumes their stoll down the avenue, not waiting for her boyfriend to catch up. Her dwindling frame snaps the ram out of his daze, and he runs to gain her.

"I thought no romantic stuff." Is all he manages to say through his sweat.

"It still stands." Is all she manages to reply.

Four blocks away, Ezekiel looks down at the bright yellow flowers he is now saddled with. They coax a smile out of hiding.

His mother will love these.


AN: Thanks for reading. Ezekiel goes from menace to society to innocent troll very quickly.

I recently put up some artwork on Reddit, a drawing of the main characters from Sophomore Year. Mysteriously, many people commented 'floppa'. I'm too afraid to look that up. Is it a compliment or an insult? Redditors continue to frighten the living daylights out of me.

Take it easy and stay safe.