Chapter 18
Mother Knows Best
Authors' Notes:
Courtney: This was originally a 31k+ word chapter, so we decided to split it up and not drown you in content (cause there is a lot coming).
Joy: Yes, well. Really much more than 31k as at the time of posting this there is still a significant amount yet to be written for part three. Yes you heard me. This will be in three parts, all of considerable length. So far it looks like all parts will exceed 10k, so get your reading glasses on because you are in for a ride! An- Courtney tell Rosalie I didn't mean that type of ride!
Courtney: I think you mean Alice there. Is that her hand in Jasper's trousers?!
Joy: I blame the boys, they've clearly corrupted Bella's sisters!
Courtney: Of course! They were the pictures of innocence before those boys!
Joy: Yep, before they met them Rosalie was such an angel. Only stealing from abandoned stores.
Courtney: And the occasional rich people.
Joy: Well yes, those too. But they can affor-Has Bella just gone into her room with Edward? Someone should make sure she doesn't kill him. We both know they aren't doing anything naughty.
Courtney: ? ゚リᆲ? well he's a goner. I guess the readers will just have to read on to see what she does to him ?
*evil cackle*
CONTENT WARNING: mentions of past abuse; an abusive, narcissistic parent
Joy: Ps, sorry this was late, my brain seems to remember me posting this chapter, yet I have not. I hope you all enjoy and let us know your thoughts!
Bella's POV
February 27th, 2003
️Day 1
Evil Arrives
I hopped out the bed of the truck, eyeing the sleek car in the driveway curiously. It certainly wasn't Charlie's, and none of the Cullens would dare show their faces in today's sunshine.
That's the kind of car only pompous arses buy to show off their wealth, I thought. And we certainly don't know anyone like that.
Rose immediately went over to it, inspecting every inch with narrowed eyes. Automatically disgusted, she turned away with a sneer. "Looks like we have a visitor."
There was a glint in her eyes that made me grin. If there was one thing Rose automatically hated, it was people who bought useless cars because of their price tag. And whenever she met those people, it never ended well for them.
She turned to the house, no doubt intending to turn someone into a pitchfork, and I couldn't help but feel relieved. My sisters had been spending more and more time with their boy toys lately, and it was beginning to feel like I never saw them. Except today was one of the rare sunny days in Forks, and I'd gotten to spend the whole day with them—with no ridiculous vampire interruptions.
Speaking of ridiculous vampires… Glancing up at the sun I couldn't help but smirk; I still found it unbelievable that one of the most dangerous supernaturals sparkled like a disco ball in the sun. Wonder Boy was never going to live this down. I already had a few jokes in mind.
However, my mood soon plummeted. As soon as we reached the front door, our ears were assaulted by heavy shrieking.
What the everloving fuck is she doing here?
I balled up my fists and burst through the door, interrupting what I could only assume was the start of a screaming match between Charlie and the mother from Hades—though I used the term mother very loosely.
I was confused, wary, and furious; Renee never visited. Which meant she wanted something—because she certainly didn't miss us—and I'd burn the world before I let her come near my sisters again.
The woman had signed the altered agreement practically in blood to give Charlie primary custody of us until our highschool graduation. She couldn't get us out of her hair soon enough. Quite frankly I was disgusted with how easily she could toss us aside. At no point in this life had we ever considered her our mother, but the least she could have done was treat us like more than matchable accessories.
However, after sixteen years of being treated worse than her knock-off Cartier earrings, I would be extremely surprised if she was here for any reason that wasn't selfish. She certainly hadn't given us so much as a backwards glance when she'd dumped us in the airport with our bags.
After I'd had some time to think practically on it, the change had been exactly what we'd needed. Her eagerness to play the virtuous blushing bride too young to have three practically grown daughters had made it that much easier to get out of there. Even if I hated her all the more for it.
But Alice had already seen us moving here and finally being happy, so I hadn't bothered sparing Renee's vapid narcissism another moment's thought.
"—llshit, and you know it Charlie! They're my daughters and I can—" Renee paused her grating shrieks the moment she noticed us and within seconds her entire demeanour changed. She smiled brightly, rushing forward and enveloping us in an overeager hug.
The only thing that stopped me snapping at her was the look on Charlie's face. He looked like he was fantasising about ripping out her hair himself, but if he could hold back, then so could I. Just until I found out what she wanted, though. Because I definitely wanted to curse the bitch to hell and back.
"Oh, my precious babies!" she cooed, scratching me with her fake nails as she cupped my face. "You're just as beautiful as I remember! I can't believe it's only been a month since I last saw you!"
She moved over to Alice next who was frozen in shock, and she clucked her tongue, lifting Alice's face to the light. "You really ought to sleep more. Those late nights do nothing for your complexion. I have some make up in my car to cover those bags under your eyes, dear."
Oh this bitch is dead. I stepped forward, but her next words shocked me to a standstill.
"Now, I know it's short notice, but you three really need to start packing. I want to leave by tomorrow." She pulled back, glancing around at the kitchen with a look of complete distaste that I knew wasn't faked. "I want to be out of this hole before I get stuck here again."
"What are you talking about?" I asked, cold darting through me. She wouldn't—she couldn't be suggesting—
She gave me a look that always made me bristle—it was like she was going over all my flaws in her head—before she smiled beatifically. "I'm rescuing you, silly. We're getting out of this backwater town!"
I could feel the panic beginning to brew off my sisters as I instinctively stepped in front of them. Even if leaving Forks might keep us safe from Victoria—my mind shuddered at her name—there was no way in Hades we'd ever leave with Renee. I'd rather have a polite conversation with Carlisle Cullen than leave with her.
"No! You can't!" Rose pressed up behind me. "We're not leaving!"
Renee's eye twitched even as she smiled sweetly. "Don't be silly, Rosalie. Go up and pack your bags."
"We're not going." I forced myself to be calm, following her show of dramatics. If she was going to pretend to care, I would pretend to not hate her. Maybe that would get her to leave sooner. "We love it here. We love Forks and we love living with Dad. Why on earth would we leave?"
Behind her, Charlie stood a little taller, smiling widely at my comment. Renee put her hand over her heart as if that was the sweetest thing she'd ever heard, but I could clearly see the irritation in her eyes.
That was when I noticed what she was wearing. I narrowed my eyes slightly at her sapphire necklace and matching earrings before inspecting the rest of her. She was still wearing her coat—made of real fur, I noted with disgust—and a blue knee-length dress that was obviously designer. Even her shoes were silver louboutins—none of which Renee could ever have dreamed of affording.
Her hair was new too. When we'd left she'd had a choppy bob that she thought had made her look younger—it didn't—but now she sported a sleek ponytail that reached the middle of her back. And that did it for me. The amount of times I had heard Renee complaining loudly to anyone who'd listen about how much she wanted—but could never afford hair like that—I knew nothing short of the damn lottery could explain her appearance.
I didn't have to wait long for my answer.
"Oh, my beautiful babies, that's so sweet!" She looked at us like she thought our 'antics' were cute. It was a look we had basically grown up with. "But you really don't have to pretend to like this dreary little hole for Charlie's sake, girls."
She shot a superior smirk in his direction, but his grin never faltered. Unlike the bitch, Charlie knew we weren't people pleasers. He even almost looked excited as he grinned at me—like he was waiting for something chaotic to happen—I couldn't help but feel pleased at his silent support. Because I was definitely going to cause chaos.
Renee might have been good at manipulating people, but I had been a master at this game long before she was even born. Growing up parentless and raising your kid sisters yourself in the 17th century meant learning quickly. And I'd always been a good student.
"Phil just got signed by the Jacksonville Jumbo Shrimp!" Renee gushed like this was the best news ever—and like we actually knew what she was talking about. "They thought he was so good—we're being paid millions! We've already gotten the most gorgeous house. You three will have your own rooms and a bathroom to die for—"
She continued to prattle and wax poetic about the house—not caring what we wanted, because her own opinion was the only one that ever mattered. Alice and Rose looked at me, panicking as they silently pleaded for me to fix this.
Life with Renee had never been a treat, but I knew it had been particularly painful for my sisters before our magic had come back. The moment we had left I had sworn we would never go back—that nothing short of a court order would make us go back to Renee. Luckily for us, Renee wasn't smart enough to weasel her way into one of those.
"Oh, and don't worry about your pagan mumbo jumbo. Phil made sure there was one of those meta-thing shops in the area. He even offered to take you himself until you learn your way around," she continued with a roll of her eyes. "Not that I know why—those places give me the creeps. If it was up to me I'd get rid of all of them."
I sneered internally at her disrespect, barely keeping myself back from snapping at her. We had endured sixteen years with this billboard of how-not-to-be-a-mother, so I knew what was coming next. She was in a good mood now and that's why she was pretending to be mother of the year. Everyone here knew what kind of a bitch she was, so the acting wasn't necessary, but Renee got a kick out of using this power play on us.
"Don't you dare," Charlie growled suddenly. "Don't you dare talk to my girls like that."
Renee blinked at him, clearly surprised at his outburst, and I had to bite my lip to keep from smiling. Renee's lip curled and her eyes flattened. "Your girls?"
"We don't want to go to Florida, Mom." I didn't want to hear another word from her; the longer she spoke, the more I considered digging up a spell to make her mute. Permanently. Instead, I continued to play the mousey little girl trying to be brave. "We love it here in Forks."
The truth was she was just a pathetic woman, desperately trying to claim back her youth by acting young. But now that her husband was playing with the big boys she'd probably realised the circles she desperately wanted to be in didn't have any wild fun loving women pretending they aren't over thirty. They were filled with respectable—if such a term could ever be attributed to a mortal—women who wouldn't find her usual shenanigans endearing, but rather uncultured and trashy. And now she most likely wanted to present herself as a loving wife and mother with three lovely perfect daughters.
Over. My. Dead. Fucking. Body.
Renee snorted. "Really, girls. Forks will stifle you! I mean you were in honours classes back in Phoenix, and now you're what? Bumped up a year and being taught things you already know because this dumpy little town can't afford the education you deserve?"
I wanted to rip her hair out. The only reason Renee had remembered we were in honours classes was because she had spent a year bragging about it to anyone who would listen. As if she was the one who did all the damn work to get us into those classes. Charlie looked sheepish.
I took another calming breath and crossed my arms. Keeping with my charade, I put on my most "mousey girl tries to be defiant" face and stood straighter. "We're not leaving Forks, Mom. We prefer it here, and you can't make us leave!" I breathed deeply again.
I had to hold my patience here. I wasn't dealing with some idiot I could scare off—nothing short of tearing her apart would scare Renee away at this point. If she'd earned even a drop of my respect, she would have had it for being so stubborn even fear couldn't change her mind. But I did not respect her. She was a manipulative narcissistic bitch, and if I never saw her again, it would be too soon.
But as much as I wanted to tear her head off, I knew the best way to change Renee's mind was to make her think it was her own idea. I had no fucking clue how to do that now, but I would come up with one soon. Because there was no way I was letting my sisters near her again. Not after what she did.
I pushed back my shoulders and looked her in the eye. This time I dropped the act and let her see my burning determination. "I won't let you take us away. Not again."
Her charade melted away as her eyes flattened. "You don't have a choice."
"Bella always has a choice." Charlie stepped between us to stare down his ex-wife. "Besides, I'm not letting you take my daughters away again for your insipid gold-digging."
My eyes widened slightly. I really hadn't expected him to go straight in for it like that, but it was fun to watch. I met his eyes as he glanced back at us. "Why don't you girls head upstairs? I'll finish with Renee and then I'll get pizza for us. I'll bring it up to you when it gets here."
I didn't particularly appreciate being kicked out, but there was something in his face that said he was doing this to help, not to exclude me.
Fine. I sniffed. It'll give me more time to plan getting this bitch out of here. I dipped my head and headed upstairs, my sisters hot on my heels.
"Well Renee, the girls have made themselves clear. So I suggest you hightail it back home and never bother us again," I heard Charlie say. "Unless I need to remind you of the written agreement that the girls would stay with me until they graduate highschool?"
"Oh please! They are my daughters and I still have primary custody." Clearly she didn't fucking understand she gave that away with the written agreement. "I can do what I like wit—" Renee's grating voice cut off as I waved a silencing spell over Rose's room.
The last thing I needed right now was to hear another of their yelling matches. We'd heard enough of those when we were kids—enough so that they'd have been ingrained into our memories even if we were mortals.
And I needed to think quickly now. This was the last thing we needed with Victoria and her lap dogs still after us. If she struck again Renee would pounce on any injuries, suspicious or not. I wouldn't put it past her to try and claim Charlie was the one making them appear—it was exactly her brand of petty and manipulative. Luckily she hadn't come any earlier. Magical remedies worked faster than the human ones so all our injuries from the battle were dealt with and mostly healed. The ones that hadn't weren't visible.
I sat down at Rose's desk as my sisters curled up on her bed. They stared at me silently, clearly waiting for a solution I didn't have yet. I tipped my head back and thought harder.
Okay, so in a court of law, people tend to side with the mother unless she's proven grossly negligent. I ran my fingers through my hair. My sisters and I could testify to her lack of care—but what's most likely to pull at their heartstrings?
I worked silently through the knots as I sorted through my thoughts. At the age of ten I took over the house work because Renee hadn't cleaned the house in months and the mould was getting out of control. There's a middle school teacher of ours who could attest to that. And I'd taken over washing our clothes long before that. I pursed my lips. Damning but they'd probably just send her to parenting classes. What else?
I worked at a particularly difficult knot. By the time we were twelve, I had been balancing the chequebook on top of everything else. But Renee's good with crocodile tears so she'll peddle some bullshit story that would probably gain her sympathy. She's good at that, I narrowed my eyes, but I'm better.
I stood up; there was a notebook in my bedside table that had some of my more delightful ideas in there. Maybe there'd be something in there that could work in getting Renee away for good. I waved at my sisters to stay where they would when they moved to follow me. I would be back in a few moments.
I only made it a few steps out of my spell's boundaries when I heard her.
"—ions! If you don't make the girls come with me, I will take this to court and make sure this is the longest, messiest custody case this side of Washington has ever seen. And with you calling my suitability into question and I yours, the girls are bound to become wards of the state until this settles. And I'll make sure those girls are in the system until they turn eighteen." There was a sickening smugness in her voice as she said, "You wouldn't want that, now would you, Charlie?"
"Are you threatening me?" he growled.
"Oh, threatening is such an ugly word. I prefer the term convincing," she said, her voice oozing smug satisfaction that made my blood boil. "After all, you may be a cop, Charlie, but I know so many lawyers. And they all owe me."
There was silence for a moment.
"I'll think about it. For now I think you should leave." Charlie sounded defeated
"Of course. And since I'm such a generous person I'll give you until tomorrow evening to decide. Then I'll expect the girls to pack in a timely manner. And you'll understand of course that they won't be making any more visits here, after we leave. After all, what would the ladies at the country club think?" Renee might as well have punched Charlie in the gut.
I saw red.
The day I let this bitch get custody of us, is the day I stop sneering at pastors. With that thought, a plan began to form in my head. Unfortunately, I would have to set aside my hatred and pride to get the help I needed.
Stupid fucking vampires.
️February 28th, 2003
Day 2
Plan A ️
"What do we do?" Alice worried at the hem of her sleeves. She stood by the window in my room staring anxiously at the empty driveway. Renee was due again in a few hours, and the encroaching threat of our 'mother' was weighing heavily on everyone's minds. "I don't want to go back to Florida. I like it here."
"We won't be going back, nymph, and I won't be letting her take you two either. Regardless of what she thinks, the fact that she signed a document altering the previous custody agreement does give us some time." I stretched in my bed, acting calmer than I felt.
"But how?" At this rate Alice would tear her sleeves to ribbons. "You heard what she said! She could take Charlie to court, and you know she never lets go of something when she has her mind set on it!" Alice leaned against the window. "She's never going to let us go."
"It's true, she could take Charlie to court, but she has to do a few things first. Mainly find a lawyer who is willing to station themselves in Forks or PA until the trial as this is our established place of residence. We're enrolled in school and we have friends here—all that works in our favour, and if necessary, we can always stall," I said firmly.
Alice seemed unconvinced that our world wasn't ending, but she did seem comforted by my surety—if only I could be so assured myself. I was tempted to ask her to scry our futures, but truthfully I wasn't entirely sure what she'd find would be good news. It never was where Renee was concerned.
"There must be some way to deal with this before the courts get involved…" Rosalie trailed off. She and I were on my bed. She was on her stomach, chin in her hands with her legs bent so her feet weren't touching my bed, though they were nearly resting against her ass. "I mean I know Phil adores us, but surely that isn't enough of a reason to want us back."
"She has money now," Alice said, the self-appointed voice of gloom for this conversation. "She can do anything she wants to."
Just then an idea struck me. "But the money isn't hers!" I grinned, sitting up.
"It's Phil's…" Rose blinked, not yet following my train of thought.
"If we want to stay here, we should call Phil! Convince him to come rein in his wife and show him how much we love it here! He's a reasonably decent mortal, he won't drag us back against our will, and Renee wouldn't dare show him her true colours," I explained. "It's his money, and that's what she's married to, so she'll do as he says."
"I'll do it," Rose said, eyes bright with hope as she pulled her phone out and sat up in a kneeling position. "I am his favourite after all."
We wasted no time in calling him, the three of us crowding close on my bed as we put the call on loudspeaker.
"Rosalie?" Phil's voice came out slightly staticky when he picked up. "It's great to hear from you. Is everything alright?"
"Of course!" Rose replied with an easy cheerful voice she reserved for the mortals she didn't hate. "We were just wondering when you were going to get here. Mum never said." Before he could say anything, she continued, "You are coming, right? Oh, please say you are! We miss you so much!"
I nodded in approval as Alice sat on the bed grinning like a Cheshire cat.
There was a long pause on the other end as Phil thought about his words carefully, before he said with a slight sigh, "Well, I wasn't going to come. Your mother wanted it to be just a quick trip to pick you ladies up."
"Pick us up? What for?" She looked the picture of innocence that I had to grin. "If you wanted us to visit you'll have to wait for a break. We can't miss that much school. It's not like in Phoenix where we had peers in our class as smart as us." That was a damn lie. No one in Phoenix was as smart as us, but that wasn't the point. "We're the smartest here so we've taken to tutoring a few of the struggling students. We can't just abandon them for a trip."
The lies rolled off Rose's tongue smoothly, and my grin grew. Phil loved volunteer work.
Then again, I thought to myself. Is it really a lie? They are technically tutoring the boys in efficient snogging methods. Though I doubt anyone as old as them would be struggling in that area.
I wonder what Edward's snogging methods are like, a small voice in my head whispered and I jerked slightly.
Shut up! I berated myself furiously. What a stupid thing to think! Edward can take a long walk off a short peer for all I care!
I focused instead on Phil's discomfort radiating through the phone. He was clearly confused and probably feeling out of the loop. It was as we'd planned on. We knew Renee wouldn't keep Phil updated—not when it would make her look anything less than perfect.
"Don't worry," Rose continued quickly. "We'll come down for either spring or summer break."
"Or you could always come visit us now?" I cut in, wanting to get back on track. "Mum said she wanted to stay at least a week here with us, so why don't you come up?"
I hated the idea of that bitch staying any longer than a second, but if we could get Phil here, it would seriously dampen her manipulative assholery. And maybe I could have her running screaming by the end of it.
"Bella! I didn't know you were there!" Phil's surprise replaced his discomfort—really, even for a mortal he was easy to distract.
"Oh, we're all here. Alice too, you're on speaker."
"Well hello there to you too, Alice!"
"Hey Phil! Sorry I've been quiet; I'm going over trig notes."
"Oh don't worry, sweetheart. You keep working hard! I'm sure you'll be teaching Forks yourself by the end of the year!"
"As if she needs to." I joked. "Besides she's not fit to be a teacher, I have an interesting story about Alice and a boy plus lockers and a lot of pain—on the boy's end, mind you, but I'll tell you that as soon as you come up to visit."
"Bella!" Alice whacked me on the arm like she was scandalised. "It was nothing like that, Phil! Just a misunderstanding!"
"Misunderstanding, my foot! Jasper still moans about shoulder pains!" Rosalie laughed.
"That's not all he moans about," I murmured, certain it was too low for Phil to hear with a wink at my now genuinely blushing sister.
"I heard that, but I wish I hadn't." Phil gave a mildly suffering sigh. "But now I'll definitely have to come visit. I've heard Forks is a beautiful town, though I'm not sure how whole it'll be with you three running amok."
"Well after you settled in, just to be fair, I'll also tell you a lovely tale about Rosalie, and a pink convertible—oh and the burly bear that was driving it I suppose, but I'm pretty sure Rose drooled more over the car than the hunk."
My sisters pouted and I grinned knowing there wasn't any sordid romantic gossip about me for them to spill in revenge
Suddenly Alice got a gleam in her eyes. "Does that mean I can tell Phil a story about you walloping some perverts in Port Angeles?" she asked innocently, but she made sure her voice carried loudly and clearly. I gave her my best glare.
Phil made a sound like he was dropping his head in his hands. "You three are giving me a heart attack. I can't begin to think about what you're doing to your father."
"Join the club." We spun around to see Charlie standing in the doorway with a rueful smile. "It's like I've subscribed to Heart Attack Weekly."
"Dad!" we cried at the same time that Phil said, "Charlie? I didn't realise you were there too."
There was a line of discomfort in Phil's voice like he was worried Charlie would be upset he was talking to us, but Charlie just watched with tired amusement.
"Well, it's hardly our fault things just happen to us," Alice babbled, eager to pay me back. "Okay maybe Bella's bruised knuckles were a little her fault but really, those guys were trying to rape her so they deserved the ass whooping—" I launched myself at my sister and slapped a hand over her mouth even though it was too late. I hadn't gotten around to telling the girls the cover story I'd given Charlie for Port Angeles
I grabbed the phone from her before she could dig me a deeper grave. "Okay, bye, Phil! We'll see you when you get here!"
"Hold on, what do you mean guys were trying to rape Bella?!"
"Sor– losing– yo— Phil—" I garbled out. "Bad connec—" I hung up.
Charlie wasn't so easy to avoid though. Particularly not when his eyebrows were that low.
"In my defence, I kicked their asses." I said innocently.
His expression just grew grimmer. Apparently a consequence of living with Charlie was he no longer believed my bullshit and evasive answers.
"I didn't leave any evidence?" I tried.
"Try again," he said gruffly.
"The only blood I shed was theirs?"
He scrubbed his hands across his face. "Bells, I'm glad you made them pay for it, but that's not what I'm upset about."
I wracked my brain for something to distract him. "Edward stopped me from becoming a murderess, I guess he was driving through the city, saw them surrounding me—"
"Edward knew about this?" He stilled. "And he didn't think to tell me either?"
"I threatened him not to." I quickly lied. "I told him that if he told you I'd make an official report and admit to attempted murder. He thinks I'm crazy enough to actually do it, so…" I trailed off.
Why was I suddenly so desperate for Charlie to not look at me like that?
Charlie sighed, leaning against the door and closing his eyes. He looked absolutely exhausted. "Bells…"
"I swear I only broke the most important bones and I didn't—"
"I don't care about them!" he exploded. "I care that my daughter was in danger and she didn't tell me!"
I furrowed my brow in confusion. "Why?" I asked, truly baffled. I know Charlie cares about us, but why would he care if I was only in a little danger. I've been through much worse—fuck, I've been in more danger just this week! And growing up, allowing Renee to cook was a hazard all on its own.
His eyes glimmered as he rubbed a shaky hand across his face. "Bells…" His shoulders slumped and he whispered, "I'm sorry."
"Why are you apologising? I took care of the problem."
"Yeah, it's not a big deal dad, that's just…Bella behaviour," Alice chimed in.
Rosalie nodded. "It's what she does."
He looked up, so heartbroken and exhausted I wanted to give him a hug. He didn't say anything as he pushed himself off the door frame and came over to us. He sat down between me and Alice and wrapped his arm around my shoulders, pulling me closer, pressed a kiss to my hair and said, "I'm sorry because it's my job to protect you, Bells."
He pulled back before I could argue. "Don't get me wrong. I am so grateful you can handle yourself, but it breaks my heart that you have to be in that position."
At that moment the doorbell rang. "That'll be dinner. Ali, Rose, can you get it please?" Charlie asked. They nodded and got up, quickly leaving the room.
I thought for a moment. "Like it's my job to protect Ali and Rose?" I asked, confident I finally understood his distress.
"No, Bells." He pulled me closer. "It's your job to be happy. It's my job to protect you three."
"I'm happy protecting Ali and Rose; it's what I'm good at." It was the one thing I knew for absolute certain. Charlie just didn't understand, couldn't understand. Mother left me in charge, so I had to be in charge—that was that.
"But you don't have to, Bells. Not anymore. Not while I'm here." He pulled me closer still. "And I plan to be here for a long time."
I looked at the door for a moment, the memories of both lifetimes swirling around in my head. Of course I had to, I always had to protect them; if I couldn't protect them, then what was I good for?
I turned my head slightly to look Charlie directly in the eye, he had to understand. "I always have to, it's just the way things are," I said firmly. I wouldn't fail them again. I wouldn't fail Mother again. She'd trusted me, counted on me. I'd already failed her once—never again.
Charlie's breath stuttered and he swallowed thickly, closing his eyes. When he opened them again, there was something in the look he gave me that made my heart hurt. "Okay, Bells. But will you let me help? Will you let me protect you too?"
"I wish I could, there are just some things no one can help with," I whispered softly.
Belatedly I realised that a bit of my magic had gotten away from me and I quickly reeled it in, I hoped that my eyes hadn't glowed. Averting my gaze I looked over at the laminated sketch of us as children. It was one I remember giving Charlie in the early years before Renee had torn us away. I'd been surprised to see he'd kept it.
I didn't bother answering his second question; it didn't warrant an answer. Given the choice between me and my sisters, the choice should always be them.
But Charlie wasn't having any of that. "If it's your job to protect your sisters, who protects you, Bells?" he pressed.
My heart stuttered. "I don't think I deserve protection." I swallowed thickly. "I failed once, you know? I failed to protect them and they paid the price," I admitted in a near whisper.
"Hey." He pulled my chin up gently so I couldn't avoid his gaze. "You deserve the world," he said firmly, ducking a little to catch my eyes and make sure I was listening. "It doesn't matter what you failed, or how many times you've failed. You deserve everything."
I shook my head, my eyes stinging. I could feel the cracks around my control spreading. I hung on to it desperately. "You don't understand—you can't, because we can't tell you—" I trailed off.
Witches were allowed to reveal themselves to humans—they had for the last thirty years—however most witches preferred not to, and those who did usually only did it for fun.
"I don't need to. And you don't need to tell me. I am your father, and that means I love you no matter what." He held onto me tighter.
"If you knew how badly I messed up—" I shook my head, the lump in my throat growing. "She trusted me to take care of them. They all did. It was the only way. Nobody else wanted to bother with us so I took care of us. It's what she trusted me to do, and I failed."
I knew he had to be confused, but Charlie never hesitated in his answer. "It doesn't matter. There is nothing you could do that would change my mind."
"They died. They died because of me, and I don't think they should ever forgive me for it, even if I brought them back. Because I almost couldn't, almost didn't have enough—" tears flowed down my cheeks as my heart constricted. I could still hear my sister's cries echoing in my head, calling to me, begging me to save them. If I'd just been stronger, just been quicker they would have lived… I whimpered.
Something shifted in Charlie's eyes, like some part of him understood what I was saying, even as it was replaced with confusion. Never in either of my lives had I so desperately wanted to tell someone everything, to unburden myself of everything that was slowly destroying me. But as Charlie sat there, earnestly looking at me, and telling me he wouldn't stop loving me for anything, I didn't want to lose that. Because I would. If he knew, he'd hate me too.
I don't want you to hate me too…
Dad shook his head. "It doesn't—"
"Even if they forgive me," I cut him off, "How can I ever forgive myself?"
"Oh, Bells." He tucked me under his chin, holding me tighter still. "Slowly," he whispered, with impossible recognition in his voice, like he somehow knew what I was feeling. "You do it slowly, and you learn to love yourself along the way."
"But I don't think I can," I whispered, my eyes burning. It was like there was a hand clenched around my throat, squeezing tighter and tighter until I couldn't breathe. "I don't think I can forgive myself."
"I forgive you." It was such an instant response that the feeling in my throat eased slightly. There was no hesitancy, no wavering in him as he looked at me steadily. "If you can't forgive yourself, then I'll forgive you until you can."
I desperately wanted to believe him, but I'd carried this pain inside of me for years. It was almost a part of me now. I couldn't let go. I didn't even know if I wanted to.
"You don't know what I am." It was an insane thought, but maybe if he knew a little bit, just a bit, he'd understand why I couldn't forgive myself.
"You're my daughter," he said just as matter-of-factly.
"I've killed people." Surely that would make him run?
To his credit, Dad didn't blink an eye. "And I'm sure they deserved it."
"I don't regret it." I had to find his limit. Something that would push him away for good, because if I could push him away now, then it wouldn't hurt as much when he eventually left us anyway.
"I wouldn't expect you to. That's not who you are."
I pulled away from him sharply. "I tied a boy to a flagpole and hung him off the roof, then forgot about him. He was naked and half frozen when they found him."
"Your sisters told me about that. He definitely deserved it."
"I reduced a waitress to tears for flirting with Edward."
"I'd be surprised if you didn't."
I turned towards him fully and furrowed my brow. "I've tortured people. I tortured those boys in Port Angeles," I added almost desperately. There had to be something that drove him away. There was always something that drove them away.
"Bella. There is quite literally nothing on this earth—and I mean nothing—that you could do or say that would make me love you any less. You are my daughter, and I will always love you. Wholly and unconditionally."
"I don't understand," I admitted shamefaced, tears rolling down my cheeks.
"You don't have to, you'll get it eventually." He pulled me back into his arms. "Just know that you don't have to do everything yourself anymore. You can lean on me sometimes. That's what I'm here for."
I furiously wiped away my traitorous tears as I heard my sisters coming back up the steps. I could hear them arguing over who got the last Dr Pepper.
They stepped into my room and Rose raised her eyebrow at Dad. "Is this where we're having dinner?"
"Why not?" he shrugged. "Grab your laptop, a movie and a bunch of pillows and we'll have a chill night tonight."
Rose's eyes lit up in excitement as she dropped the pizzas on the edge of my bed and raced to her room.
I smirked despite how my face ached at the impossible motion. "I know the perfect movie. Ever seen the 'Bell Witch haunting'?"
My sisters groaned. They well knew my obsession with witch movies. They thought it was a sick sense of humour. I disagreed.
Dad sighed. "I'm not going to sleep tonight, am I?"
I put on my most innocent face. "That depends."
Alice glared at me. When I had made her watch it last year she had slept with virtually every protection stone around her bed for a month. Rose had threatened to make me eat Renee's cooking when I suggested we go to the bell witch cave and explore.
I looked at Dad with a certain glint in my eyes. "You know, she did actually exist, her cave—"
"No." Rose glared at me over her pillows when she came back in. "We're watching something fun tonight. The bitch has already ruined today, I don't need to be scared shitless too."
I pouted. "Home alone?" I sighed.
"Much better!" Alice plopped down next to me while Rose set it all up.
I huffed and pouted more when I noticed the DVD was already in her hand. Damn my need to cater to these feinds. Oh well if we couldn't watch a scary movie perhaps I could scare the boys? Tell them that I was going to adopt the ideas from the move? Hmmmmm…
Rosalie shot a look at me like she knew exactly what I was planning.
As we settled in around Dad and waited for the movie to start, he sighed. "I'm sorry about involving you girls in all this mess with Renee. You deserve better. I never wanted you to be caught in the middle of this. This is between Renee and I, and I'll do my best to keep you three out of it, okay?"
"Thanks, Dad." Rose snuggled into his side.
"We don't want to go with her," Alice murmured, clutching her Dr Pepper can tight enough to nearly crush it. "We really do want to stay here with you."
"Then you will, sweetheart." Dad wrapped his arms around me and Rose and reached over to stroke Alice's hair from where she snuggled in beside me. "You'll stay here as long as you like."
I agreed with Dad. The girls wanted to stay so we would. No matter what I had to do to make that bitch leave empty handed.
I rested my head on his shoulder and pressed play on the movie as he kissed the crown of my head.
March 1st 2003
Day 3
So This is Love
"You will never see them again." I waited for the blow up, knowing it was coming, and that was exactly what I wanted.
Jasper and Emmett flinched, and they paled as much as vampires with zero blood flow could.
"The hell are you talkin' about?" The cowboy's accent was in full swing. "You can't just stop us from seein' them. I don't care how terrifyin' you are, the only person who can keep me away from Alice is Alice."
"Not me—Renee. Like it or not, she is our mother in this life which means she can legally drag us back to Florida whether we like it or not. And Florida isn't exactly disco-ball vampire friendly." I crossed my arms. As much as I wanted to do this myself, I needed their help, and I needed them to realise just how much of a threat she was.
And as much as I would have liked these boys out of my sisters' lives, I'd make a deal with a demon to keep us away from that bitch. "So you're going to help me get rid of her, or you'll be lucky to see my sisters when we turn eighteen."
Jasper closed his eyes and I felt a bit more respect for him. Anyone who nearly had a heart attack at being separated from either of my sisters was good enough in my books. That didn't mean I had to like it though.
Emmett cracked his knuckles. "Esme is going to hate it, but if we hide the woman's body in different states she'll never have to know."
I perked up at the idea
"We're not murdering anyone," Edward cut in annoyingly.
"I agree with Edworm unfortunately. As much as I would love to put that woman's head on a pike, it'll cause us more trouble than she's worth." I looked outside to where her car had parked yesterday. "So I have another plan. You're going to knock me up."
"WHAT?" Edward choked on air and looked seconds away from a heart attack.
"Oh calm down, not really. I'm just going to tell Renee that you have."
"Charlie will kill me."
I waved my hand. "He already knows the plan." I refrained from mentioning how he was in stitches when I first told him about it, and he was, in his words, 'going to get some popcorn and watch the show'. I turned to the other two. "And you two need to be extra lovey dovey towards my sisters. We need to cement the idea that we aren't leaving Forks."
"Plus arent you bullet proof or something?" Rose asked as she inspected her nails.
"He'll still find a way," Edward murmured and shivered.
"Oh, stop being such a baby about it, it's just one little fake pregnancy." Alice shrugged.
If he could have fainted, I was sure Edward would have. I'd never imagined a terrified vampire would look so wonderfully hilarious. I wonder just how far I could push it before he actually passes out.
"Why can't Rosalie or Alice do it?" he practically whined
"Don't want to." Rose shrugged.
"I don't even want to pretend I'm pregnant." Ali shuddered. "Yuck. Don't want kids, never have and never will. Even Renee knows I'm on the pill and would have handled any accidents by now if that failed."
Jasper looked relieved and I narrowed my eyes at him before turning on Edward.
"Are you saying you wouldn't want to have a baby with me?" I asked Edward sweetly.
"Careful, bro! It's a trap!" Emmett said dramatically.
Edward rolled his eyes, having somewhat recovered. "I d—"
"Choose your words wisely, your brother's right—it's a trap."
He scowled. "I don't see how any of this will actually help. Wouldn't your mother be more likely to whisk you all away because I got you pregnant?"
"Are you completely stupid? There's obviously the chance that the pregnancy could be high risk, that coupled with the fact that she'd be pulling me away from the potential father of my child would make her look like a monster, at least to Phil. His parents were separated similarly and he doesn't believe in splitting up families if it can be helped." I shrugged.
"I'd think it would make her look like a good mother to a lot of people," Jasper cut in. "Times haven't changed that much in the last few centuries, and a kid gettin' pregnant is always gonna be more of a scandal than separatin' the parents. If anything I'd expect her to whisk you away faster and take you to the nearest abortion clinic."
"She ultimately cares more about what Phil thinks, she could spin letting me stay with Edward into a beautiful sacrifice on her part. But Phil might divorce her if she separates me from Edward against my wishes." Was Jasper even listening? It's like he hadn't heard a word I said. Either that or he was mentally challenged.
"A more reasonable argument would be that Renee and Phil are more well off than your father and so it would make more sense to take you away." Jasper was starting to get on my nerves with his constant devil's advocating.
"And so you're clearly deaf because you're not listening to me! Get it through your non-existent brain, Renee can turn the public to her way of thinking, but not Phil. She doesn't give a damn what sounds more reasonable to them if Phil divorces her for separating us. This isn't about public approval, it's about keeping her meal ticket. Public approval can be won with a good sob story; she only wants us to be there as trophies. But Phil she'll do anything to keep."
"I'm just making sure you have all the possibilities covered." Jasper crossed his arms over his chest.
"What use is going over fucking possibilities that won't work? If you're not going to be any help—"
Edward held up his hand, cutting me off before I could tear into the cowboy. "Fine. I'm getting you pregnant—" oh if vampires could blush "but—what happens when she finds out you're not?" I could see his brain working it out and I felt a flicker of appreciation for the way his mind worked when he answered his own question; "We'll make a big show out of grieving for our baby and how there's no way we can be parted. How this terrible ordeal has only made us love each other more."
Thank the gods at least one of their brains weren't addled. I shot another glare at Jasper. Really, going over possibilities I just explained wouldn't fucking matter?
"A home pregnancy test gives out false positives all the damned time, sp we'll just show one of those after we've spelled it to show 'pregnant' and then after she leaves we won't have to keep up the charade. We wait a few months until we're seventeen and if she asks later on we'll just say, 'oh, did we forget to tell you? It was a false positive'." I paused to ensure they were listening. "By then we'll be seventeen and any court would take our wishes into account or laugh Renee out of court as we'll be adults in a year at that point."
Edward pouted like he wanted to do his lovey dovey idea, but then he narrowed his eyes, considering. "And we can make a show of it when we tell her like we were planning on waiting to see a doctor before telling anyone."
I rolled my eyes again. He really was set on this romantic plan. Not that it was a terrible idea—I just wasn't going to tell him that.
"The pregnancy should be the back up plan." Emmett piped in. "You say she cares what Phil thinks, maybe if we're all lovey dovey in front of them Phil won't want to take you away and tell her to drop it." It was a surprisingly smart idea.
I conceded. "Fine, but you can't make it look like you're putting on a show. She needs to believe you."
Emmett winked at Rose. "Oh I think we have that handled."
Rose grinned. "Half the town thinks we've been hooking up since before we even got here."
"I don't need to fake my love for Alice," Jasper said like he wanted to be included.
Alice swooned and I gagged. "You're all disgusting. Good. She'll be back in three hours so you'll need to be here before then to set the scene. Now get out—I need to clean the house of your germs."
I stood in the kitchen, leaning against the fridge as if checking its plug. Only my sisters and I knew that from this angle you could see directly into the living room and the coat closet near the stairs. The perfect vantage point.
Renee was in Dad's office. His job was to keep her there with 'paperwork' showing his full legal custody until we were ready. Emmett and Rose had positioned themselves on the couch just as Jasper and Alice slipped into the closet. Edward was outside with roses in hand ready to infuriate Renee with his mere presence—Hekate knew he did it to me often enough.
When everything was ready. I texted Dad:
The Warden: 'Spiders behind the fridge'
It was our code to let him know to release the she-demon.
A moment later Renee came storming out of the office, a look of fury on her face. As soon as she got to the living room she gasped. There on the couch Rose had made herself comfortable on Emmett's lap and they were slowly making out with his hands firmly on her hips. She pulled back after a moment and dropped her forehead against his. He had a dazed look on his face as he murmured something to her and she giggled, biting her lip in response.
Renee's cheeks coloured before she huffed in frustration and turned to the closet where she'd hung her coat. A second later she let out a horrible shriek and stumbled away.
I had to cover my mouth with my hand. Jasper and Alice had gone way off script. Instead of just snogging, Alice's legs were wrapped around Jasper's hips practically dry humping him. Jasper was shirtless while Alice was in her bra—her unhooked bra.
I suppose we should be grateful they kept their bottoms o— I spoke too soon.
Jasper's pants which had apparently been unbuttoned dropped to the floor with a little help from Alice's feet. And then I snorted because Alice—sweet demonic Alice who was still swapping spit with Jasper—reached into the coats, yanked Renee's down and threw it at her. As soon as it hit her stunned face Jasper reached out and closed the fucking door.
The sound of my laugh rang throughout the house as Renee ran out the front door. Coat clutched in her hands.
March 2nd, 2003
Day 4
Kiss and Tell
"Bella darling?" Renee called up the stairs with her sickly sweet voice and my head snapped up. "Are you ready? If we want to catch our flight, we really need to leave now!"
Shit. We're not ready. Ali and Rose looked up at me frantically. The six of us were crowded into my room planning what the fuck we had to do. And if she came in now our whole plan would be in ruins. I had to do something. I glanced at Edward. Oh, fuck it.
"Keep working," I murmured to my sisters. "I'll deal with this."
I grabbed Edward's arm and pulled him outside my room as Renee's heels began clicking up the stairs. I spun him around and shoved him against the door as I wound my arms around his neck. "You'd better make this look real, asshole," I murmured to the bewildered vampire and surged up to press my lips to his.
It was awkward at first as he squawked and nearly stumbled in surprise, but when I squeezed the back of his neck, he got the message. One hand settled on my waist, pulling me closer and the other cupped my jaw. I tilted my head, deepening the kiss and a shiver went down my spine as his tongue swept along my lower lip. I stepped closer, pressing him harder against the door and nipped at his bottom lip, making him shudder and arch into me.
I distantly heard Renee's heels hit the top of the stairs, knew she was watching, but I couldn't find it in myself to care, not when his fingers were making wonderful, searing sweeps along my skin. Not when he made those soft groans as I scraped my nails along his neck. I wound my fingers into his soft bronze hair and tried to pull him impossibly closer.
Any closer and we'd be one person. His mouth opened and I deepened the kiss even more. Not enough.
Every dizzying sweep of his tongue against mine, every shuddering gasp from his throat as I tugged his hair—it was intoxicating.
Someone coughed behind us and we broke apart, chests heaving. I spun around to see Renee glaring at me, with Phil and Dad standing behind her staring at us with wide eyes.
"You can't go to Florida," Edward murmured in my ear, his breathing raggard and I looked back at him, feeling as dazed as he looked. "You can't." His voice was low but it carried along the hall and I knew our audience had heard.
He was staring at me like he hadn't even seen our audience, like he only had eyes for me. My heart stuttered at the look and I found myself leaning unconsciously closer.
"That. Is not your decision." Renee's voice was cutting as she glared at us.
Irritation shuttered through Edward's eyes but he didn't look away from me. His thumb rubbed across my cheek as his eyes shot to my stomach. He swallowed thickly and looked away swiftly, but it was lingering enough that anyone watching would have seen.
I glanced over at Renee but she just looked pissed. However, Phil and Dad were watching with an intensity that told me they had definitely seen the look.
I untangled my hands from his hair and slid them down his chest to then self-consciously flatten my shirt over my stomach. I leaned into his touch like I was drawing strength from him before I turned to face our audience.
Renee barely glanced over me as she said with faux concern. "Isabella. You really should watch what you eat—you've clearly put on quite a bit of weight."
I forced myself to pale and swallow thickly, but internally I was cackling.
Renee's constant need to belittle me and my sisters was once again working against her. Edward wrapped his arm around my shoulder, pulling me into his chest. It was still warm from where I'd been pressed up against him moments ago and I felt my cheeks flush like a schoolgirl.
"I think she's as beautiful as she ever was," he said in a voice that brokered no argument. He looked down at me, his voice sweet and soft as he said, "In fact I think beautiful is too pale a word for her. She looks radiant. Like stars on a moonlit night. Or flowers in the first bloom of spring."
Sweet Circe this boy doesn't stop, does he? Did he eat a poet or something? But that didn't stop my heart from stumbling that much faster.
"And who are you?" Renee's voice was cold. It always was when she wasn't the centre of attention.
Edward's eyes were just as cold as he looked over at her, but his voice was polite as he introduced himself. "Edward Cullen. Son of the town's favourite doctor."
I swallowed my grin. He really had been listening.
"And the love of my life," I added with a bright smile that only faltered slightly when I felt his breath hitch under my hand. "And he's being modest, Dr. Cullen is so much more than the best doctor in Forks," I added ambiguously. Really I couldn't bring myself to give a better compliment. But I knew my 'mother' and how she would take it. She'd assume it meant he was rich off his arse, and could easily get a better position.
Renee's eye twitched. Her primary goal had always been to land a doctor, so it brought me no small amount of satisfaction to rub it in. "And Edward's leaning towards medicine as well." I couldn't resist pouring salt into the wound.
Dad piped in. "Yep. And Edward's been such a sweetheart to Bella too. Always driving her to school and taking her on picnics. Oh, and you should see the fancy jewellry he's bought her," he said to Phil, knowing exactly what it would do to his ex-wife.
When Phil turned to nod appreciatively at Edward, Dad winked at me. I knew I was bound to get plenty of teasing about this later, but I was more grateful than he'd ever know.
"Even pearls?" Renee asked, clearly trying to call our bluff and I wanted to strangle her. Just the mention of those damn things had me burning with fury.
Edward stiffened, pulling me in closer to him. "Of course not," he said with clear disdain. "Bella hates pearls."
How does he know that? I glanced up at him and he looked down at me, his gaze turning soft. He ran a gentle finger along my cheek, leaving a burning trail in its path.
"Hate isn't a strong enough word," Dad mumbled and I was distracted from the intense look in Edward's eyes as he read Dad's mind. Based on Edward's expression I had a fairly good idea what he was remembering: I'd been five when he'd caught me beheading my dolls for the crime of "buying pearls".
With a jolt of realisation I felt like slapping myself. Of course Edward had read Renee's mind as she spoke, learning about my aversion to pearls. That was how he knew. Obviously!
"Yes, well." Renee looked like she'd swallowed something distasteful. "This is a family matter. So you and your brothers need to leave. Please."
"I am family," Edward said automatically before his eyes widened comically and he glanced down at me like he'd just revealed a huge secret. I ducked my head to cover my burning cheeks. It wasn't even hard to blush right now—there was something about Edward's arms around me that left me annoyingly flustered.
"What is that supposed to mean?" Renee sounded like she was one step away from screaming at us, and that was exactly the kind of frayed we needed her to be.
I glanced at Dad like I was desperate for help digging myself out of this, and he cleared his throat. "He means what he said, Renee. They're in love, and he's been good to her. He saved her from getting hit by a car a few weeks ago! And from a bunch of hooligans in Port Angeles the week after! That makes him family in my books." Dad sounded so sure and so deep into the role that I half wondered if he was where I got my glorious acting skills from. Circe knows I didn't have them in my first life. "Not to mention how deeply in love they are."
Phil's face hardened at the mention of the incident in PA. I couldn't understand why but Dad winked at me before I could focus on it, and I wanted to poke my tongue back, but all eyes were on me again.
"Well that definitely wasn't a kiss you give a friend," Phil added.
Now you're all being ridiculous! I huffed silently. I'm a good actor, that's all! I'm not in love with him! It's Edward! Why would I be in love with his stuffy ass? They're being ridiculous, stupid, and completely impossible! I thought firmly. He's an asshole and he's awful, and yes he took a mortal-killing blow meant for Alice, and he smells nice sometimes, and he's a good kisser, but that doesn't mean I'm in love with him! That's preposterous!
But a little voice popped up in my head asking, Then why does it feel like your skin's on fire whenever he touches you? Why do you want to lean into him and just let the world melt away?
That's just hormones! I'm going through puberty again! Shit's going crazy all the time, I argued with myself. And okay maybe he doesn't look awful, but that's just my body going crazy from not getting laid in a while.
I could almost taste the sarcasm of my inner voice: Sure. Sure. Whatever helps you sleep at night.
I took a deep breath to tell the voice exactly where it could shove its thoughts when I realised everyone was staring at me. I blinked as Edward's hands skimmed up my arms to my shoulders.
Did I seriously just zone out to have an argument with myself about Edward?
"Bella?" he murmured, looking every bit the doting boyfriend (it's just an act!). "Are you okay? Is it getting too much, love? How about we get some fresh air?" He glared at Renee with all the rage his seventeen-year-old persona could muster.
"Oh. I'm fine, I just got a little dizzy. Nothing to worry about." I smiled sweetly at him,
I could see Renee about to explode with the full steam coming from her ears and I wanted to provoke her further, but Phil beat me to it by pulling her away. "Honey, can I speak to you for a minute, please?"
"We'll go down to the living room." I needed to keep them away from my room for as long as possible while the others set everything up. "Please join us when you are finished talking," I said, making sure to speak loud enough for Renee to hear as Phil pulled her away. Though it was also to disguise the sound of my door locking as I silently cast a spell to keep her out. I didn't trust her not to snoop. "I think this is all just too much. I don't know if I can handle more of this arguing." I pitched my voice with just the right amount of sadness as I saw Phil's brows furrow.
Maybe it was wrong of me to use his past against him, but I would do much worse for my sisters. Carlisle had raised concerns over using people's trauma to manipulate them, and I'd sneered at him, asking him what was more important: being a goody goody, or protecting family. He'd begrudgingly agreed and I'd suggested he absent himself from our plans. Even Esme hadn't seen a problem with my plan, and that was because she was a proper parent who would do anything for her children. I admired her greatly for it. As one would admire an enemy's tactics of course.
Dad headed downstairs first, then Edward and I. We didn't need to linger. Edward and I could hear them perfectly well. I wasn't sure about Dad though. Somehow he always seemed to hear things normal humans couldn't, but other times he didn't seem to hear things at all, and I couldn't decide if it was out of respect for others' privacy, or if he really couldn't hear what was going on.
He claimed the walls here were thin, but I knew that wasn't true. The houses in Forks were built well and sturdy to keep out the cold and rain. The walls were as thick as could be. I shook my head. I'd figure it out later, it wasn't important. Not like our mission which i had privately named 'Operation Boot The Bitch'.
"What's going on?" Phil's voice filtered down the stairs.
"What do you mean, cookie?" Renee's saccharine voice followed and I tried not to gag.
Ugh! She's laying it on thick.
"Why are you pushing so hard for the girls to come back with us? I've never seen you push so hard to spend time with them."
I snorted and could almost hear Renee bristling at the unintentional insult. "They're my daughters, Phil! Of course I want to spend time with them!"
"Okay," he said slowly. "Well why not let them stay here and you can visit them, or they can visit us on the holidays? You had thirteen years with them, maybe it's Charlie's turn now?"
"How can you say that!" she cried, overdoing it to the max. "How can you let them stay in this ridiculous backwater town a minute longer? How can you not want to save them?" She sniffled. "I just want to save them from the mistake I made when I was their age. If my mother had cared about me half as much as I care about them, she would have whisked me away before I'd been so traumatised!"
"Oh I know, honey, I know," Phil cooed, and I could hear him pulling her into his arms while she sobbed disgustingly. "You went through so much in this town, and I'm so proud of you for facing your fears to come back and save your daughters."
Dad glanced at me, rolling his eyes at her theatrics and I grinned, realising he could hear just as well as I could.
Her sobs grew in decibels and idiocy. "I hate it here so much! You've seen how the people treat me! They're smiling and loving to your face, and then the minute your back is turned they're stabbing all their kitchen knives into it! I know they hated me before for being better than them, but now that I have everything, it's so much worse! Every second I'm here I worry they'll kill me! Oh, Phil!"
My mind whirled with possible counter plans to go against the image she painted of the town. Maybe I should say I wanted to spend time with Phil and show him around town? Loathe as I was to admit it, the townspeople would unintentionally confirm Renee's accusations and act bordering on rude to Phil, simply because he was married to Renee. Until I changed their minds, of course; the older generation liked me well enough. And the things that passed themselves off as school children were malleable enough.
"They won't, honey. It may be a small town, but even they couldn't get away with something like murder." As much as I liked the man, I wanted to roll my eyes at his blindness. Was he really believing this rot? "I'm just worried your girls might hate you for taking them away from here. They clearly seem to love Charlie, and they seem quite attached to the boys here."
"That's my point!" she cried. "That's exactly where I was when I was their age! I was so besotted with Charlie I never realised what kind of hell I was being dragged into! If they stay here they'll only ruin their lives! They'll get knocked up and have to live dead-end jobs for the rest of their lives! I don't want them to have to deal with that!"
"Honey, it will be alright. Besides, I doubt they're besotted with Charlie," he joked, clearly trying to inject some humour in their conversation. It was one of the reasons I tolerated Phil; he sometimes had a wickedly twisted sense of humour.
Dad turned from where his head was tilted towards the stairs to give me an exasperated look, as if to say 'really? You find that funny?' I grinned back before tuning in again to the drama upstairs.
"I don't think it's as bad as you think." Phil cut off whatever ridiculous thing she was about to spout. "Charlie is a good man who clearly wants the best for his daughters—"
"How can you say that when he's letting them go at it like rabbits?" she hissed, her perfect facade cracking for a moment before she took a deep breath. "Yesterday I caught two of them half naked in the coat closet, and the other two on the couch in full view! He clearly lets stuff like that happen all the time!"
"I do not," Dad mumbled and I shushed him with a grin.
Phil chuckled lightly. "They're teenagers, honey. I doubt he can control them all the time, and they're probably doing it on purpose while you're here to show you how much they don't want to leave."
I hummed. Phil's smarter than he looks.
"That's even worse! It means he has no control over them! Children need to be taught discipline or they'll end up like hooligans on the—"
"Don't, Renee." He cut her off with a tightness in his voice that made Dad and I glance at each other. It was the closest to pissed I'd ever heard Phil get. "They might still be kids, but they're smart girls. And your problem isn't with them, it's with Charlie. Don't take it out on them just because you're mad at your ex-husband."
A few weeks after Phil had proposed to Renee, he had pulled me aside for a chat. At that point he and Renee had only been dating a few months and I hadn't bothered to know him at all, so I'd assumed he was going to give me some stupid chat about how he was going to be our dad and whatnot, but he'd surprised me.
He sat me down, treated me like an adult and said he never wanted to replace Charlie. That he wasn't marrying Renee with the expectation that we would call him Dad. He then went on to explain that he was a child of a broken and nasty marriage. That his parents had constantly wrestled over him and made his life miserable. They had both loved him, but their hatred of each other had overshadowed that to the point where they didn't see how they'd hurt him. In the end he'd spent most of his time with his father with the occasional visit his mother forced on him. He used that to explain how he didn't want that for us. That we weren't his children, but he wanted to do everything in his power to make sure we never felt like that.
I'd only been twelve at the time—to him at least—but he'd treated me with the respect he would an equal, and from then on he was on my "decent mortals" list.
Renee must have remembered the same thing about his parents because she sighed magnanimously. "Right. I'm sorry, cookie. I didn't mean to upset you. I just get so mad at Charlie that I can't help myself."
"I know." He sighed too. "And I know you love your girls, but think about it from their point of view. They really seem to be in love with these boys, and the boys seem to adore them right back."
"It's just puppy love," Renee dismissed. "They'll get over it when they get out of this ridiculous wet hole of a town."
"Don't be so sure, honey. You were my puppy love."
I gagged. Ugh. Just when I was starting to like Phil. That's just—
Edward's leg brushed against mine and all thoughts but him went out of my head.
I bit my lip. For the first time I felt myself in some danger of falling for Edward. It was unacceptable. He was unacceptable. Obviously I had to get over this little crush my mind had conjured. It was no doubt because of the scheme I'd come up with. My mind had latched onto it and assumed it was real. It was my fault for taking the scheme from my own stories.
No one knew I wrote. I'd begun two years ago when Alice had briefly become enamoured with writing. She was so good at drawing she got it into her head that if she took up writing then she could write and illustrate her own books. I hadn't thought anything of it, then the next week she had discovered fanfiction and she was hooked. For about four months.
She left all but one of her stories uncompleted and felt guilty because people wanted more, so she'd asked me to take over them. I'd had to back out of the scholars debating program I'd signed up for, but it had made Alice happy, and she enjoyed where I took her stories. I quickly began to like it as well.
Crafting worlds, governments, people. It was intoxicating and I'd cherished those four hours a day where I could be anywhere, anyone, I wanted.
After finishing Alice's stories I'd secretly made my own account on various fanfiction sites and left Alice's up so people could still enjoy those stories. When we'd moved here there weren't any after school clubs for Alice and Rosalie so I had taken a hiatus to spend time with them. But I still worked on my stories whenever I had a moment to.
I pursed my lips. When my sisters looked to me for a plan to get away from Renee I hadn't had a definite plan. And that first night I pulled out my notebooks from the false bottom of my bedside table and taken out some of my original stories to read and de-stress.
First Victoria, and now Renee. I was caught in the middle without any idea what to do. My sisters were counting on me, I couldn't fail them. Not in this. Not again.
As I'd read my stories a wicked idea had planted itself in my brain. A dramatic, crazy plan, so crazy it just might work. In my story an heiress was contracted to marry the son of her father's friend to merge their businesses when their fathers finally passed on. To stop it she'd made a deal with her childhood friend and her father's biggest business competitor. The childhood friend was a CEO of a company he'd built himself. The girl had pretended to get pregnant with his child to force her father to let them get married. Of course it was a romance and the girl and the friend eventually fell in love.
Obviously that part of the story wouldn't be happening for me.
Edward couldn't be that for me. He was all wrong. He was a vampire—what did he know about witches that we hadn't already told him? He knew hardly anything about witches' health. Did he even know anything about our beliefs? Our holidays? He can't be good for me, especially with his lifestyle.
He actively avoided killing people whereas I had no problem doing so, especially if it was for my sisters. And I didn't regret any of the lives I took. Not. One. Surely he expected me to regret them, or come to regret them, but I wouldn't. And that would bother him. He could never accept me for who I was.
I knew he had feelings for me, but he couldn't be in love with the real me. He was in love with the public version. The illusion that I showed everyone. He didn't know how ruthless I could be. The incident with the rapists wasn't even the tip of the iceberg. He didn't know what I did to Royce King. My sisters knew something of it, but not the full story. They'd told me they hadn't wanted to know, and I hadn't brought it up since.
Edward, so sure in his ideas of right and wrong as he was, couldn't, wouldn't, accept the real me. I would conquer this crush I had and go on caring for my sisters. I was safe in the knowledge that I wouldn't fall for someone like him. I'd have to make that clear before we moved forward, though. It would be cruel to let him keep falling in love with an illusion. A little pain now was preferable to more pain later when he realised I wasn't fit for the pedestal he'd already built for me.
But when I turned to break his heart and saw him looking down at me with eyes so round and full of wonder, I couldn't breathe.
Oh. Oh.
I can't do it, I realised with a blink. Not when he's looking at me like that; like I'm the sun and he doesn't care if he goes blind, just as long as he gets another glimpse.
I was already too far gone.
I'm so screwed.
Authors' Notes:
Courtney: This chapter is delightful. Not only because it's therapy for my own parent's crappy marriage but because Ed and Bella are killing me. So much. They're so adorable and hopeless and I love it. I can't wait to see what you all think of it and how you'll react to what's coming.
Joy: ha, yep. For my contribution to Renee I gave her some of my sister's worst traits, meaning her entire personality. Adding a bit extra of course. She's too lazy to poison anyone, however we do keep knives away from her. Renee will get her due sooner or later. And I hope you all enjoyed this chapter! Feel free to share your thoughts…or throw rotten things at Renee.
Courtney: See you next chap!
