The Photograph
Months pass and Haymitch answers Katniss' questions.
P.S. Suzanne Collins owns The Hunger Games Trilogy.
18 February
Dear sweetheart,
I hope this letter reaches you all the way in the snowy mountains of Asia. You've been there for months now, and I hope you were able to take pictures of that damn big cat that's so coveted in New York.
Then you could come home.
It's not good to run away from your problems, sweetheart. You know that. It never fixes anything.
To answer your question: your father, my brother, had a big heart, and he loved all three of you girls very much. I'd also give some credit to your mother. I respect her for being honest and working hard to take care of your family when your father was alive. I know she wasn't the best mother after Jeremiah died, but people deal with grief differently. That's something I realized only with old age.
Jeremiah was deeply hurt by your mother's infidelity. God knows your father had his endless sessions with the bottle to ease the pain. I spent countless nights in the lake cabin with him, watching him stare into the darkness and question himself and what he had done wrong for Lavender to stray. He got mad at her, he got mad at himself, he got mad at the guy who stole his wife, he cried, he despaired, he laughed bitterly and spitefully - he allowed himself to feel the constant sting in his chest until he was too tired. He went through all the emotions while hiding it so well from you girls.
Later on, after his heart was made raw and emptied out, he weighed his options and listened to his thinking heart. He said it's the heart that's sensible - the part of him that considered everything, not just the pain and the hurt. Your father, bless his soul, was weird and divergent, but I couldn't deny his logic and reason most of the time.
In the end, he decided he didn't want to separate from his wife and break up his family. That was the choice he made.
Before your father's accident, you admired your mother a lot - you and Prim both. You would fall in line to get your hair braided every morning by her, and you'd bring her flowers from the meadows after school just like your father did every day. On her birthday, you'd all sing to her. Sometimes, when you all just felt like it, you'd churn out songs too. After your mother's shift at the hospital, you'd take turns brushing her hair and plaiting it. When you were young, you worshiped your mother - both of your parents - and your father didn't want to pull the rug from under your feet and destroy that sense of security that you and Prim had.
You could also say that your father loved your mother very much. He said that he loved her more than he hated what she did. So he forgave her. He explained to me that everyone makes mistakes and that Lavender was no exception. He saw that your mother was genuinely ashamed of what she did, and she was truly sorry. For him, that was enough. I didn't understand him then. I thought he was crazy being so blind and forgiving. Once a cheater, always a cheater, I'd told him.
But see, my brother was not me. Jeremiah had always been that man, and that son. He saw things through a different lens ever since we were children. Following the day he met your mother in high school, he had worked hard to earn her love even though she was from the other side of life. She was rich, and we were poor. She was white, and we were colored. It's a clash of two worlds.
When your mother reciprocated my brother's affection and left her family and inheritance to marry him, he was the happiest man in the whole state. He said that he still wanted to be that. That he still wanted a family and a life with Lavender Everdeen. He truly loved her. That's the curse of an Everdeen right there. We tend to love fiercely and in an undying way. You know that, and I know that from my beloved wife, Amelia.
I know this kind of love scares the living hell out of you. You may not say it, but Peeta, that damn kid, scares the living hell out of your heart. I wish things were like chalk and cheese because I think you knew early on that he was different from the rest. Your Aunt Amelia saw it too. She saw the change in you when you were with him.
Sweetheart, you have every right to run away from him and vanish him from your life. I'll support you and scare the living hell out of that kid if you want me to. I don't think I'd need to do that, but your decision is my decision.
Resolve things, sweetheart. This way, you won't have any regrets. You will make your father proud by facing your problems as he did many years ago.
Your aunt Amelia and I look forward to seeing you soon.
Take care of yourself, sweetheart.
Haymitch
Thank you so much for reading. Comments are much appreciated.
