"How many times do I have to repeat if you can't do it right.."

"Get out of my labs. Yeah, I know perfectly well. You have been spouting that for days now." Groused Jack as he ignited his blow torch once more. Since he lived in Ratchets labs, he had somehow become his defacto work assistant. On most days, he could deal with everything but this day was one of the worst.

Being stuck in the base has become exciting and not the good kind. Jack was going stir-crazy, and it didn't help that he just wanted to be alone most days. Even Optimus was getting on his nerve, and he was the kindest bot Jack knew.

And once more, the root of his problem was Crossroads, mainly his memories, which could also be called his memories. Jack was getting a headache just thinking of it.

The more he learned about his past, the worse he dealt with it.

The memories never came in complete, easy-to-understand packages. Instead, Jack got headache-inducing pieces that made no sense and threw him into a tailspin of confusion and frustration. These emotions were starting to spill over, and everyone on base noticed. Which somehow made it so much worse.

Their pity and soft voices of reassurance that 'it will get better or 'is there anything I can do?' We were grating to one's ego and confidence if you heard them eight times a day by five different bots.

So now he found solitude in just annoying Ratchet with how poorly of an assistant he was. It was surprisingly lovely and stabilizing to do.

He felt a smile tug on his lips when Ratchet muttered angrily about lousy assistants. Despite how much Jack has messed up, Ratchet never forces him out, and he never would. Jack knew that for sure. Ratchet saw what the others did and tried to help in his grumpy way. If that just happened to include free help for Ratchet in the process, Jack has reframed from mentioning it.

It felt fulfilling to help. Everyone on base has been treating Jack like he would shatter any second, which means a lack of everything he has been used to—no more patrols with Arcee. Bulk and Bee reframe from sparing when he's around, fearing they may hit him. Optimus was the only one who seemed normal, but things have changed there too. Jack wasn't sure how their relationship had changed. Still, he could feel the difference pulsing in his chest, which was both disturbing and comforting on equal levels—explaining why Jack was avoiding the Autobot leader almost as much as his mom.

Jack cringed when he thought of his mom. His grip on the blowtorch tightened as he stared at his project.

Ratchet was nagging again, but Jack ignored him and turned off his tool. The medic noticed his movements and halts as well. His optics were silently imploring Jack to talk.

Looking down, he licked his lip despite not needing to. He was fidgeting with his jacket sleeves, the material feather-light and soft to the touch, something no human could make.

"Do you think I'm being too hard on my mom?"

Jack didn't need to look up to tell Ratchet's mood. In his mind, he could picture the stony face paired with soulful optics. Jack has been getting that face from the bot whenever Jack or others mention his mom. The clattered of tools hitting the workbench told Jack Ratchet was giving his full attention to his question. Warmth bloomed in Jack's chest.

"June was wrong."

Jack flinched back at his stern voice. Jack understood what the medic meant.

"However, despite that. She is still your carrier. The person who cared for you these past sixteen years is something not many would do. Space is a wise choice when you're afraid of causing more damage to a relationship, but at some point, you need to realize if you're delaying a conversation that needs to happen."

Jack gulped, eyes half-lidded as he stared at the nearby wall, still looking away from Ratchet. He could hear the metal steps approach him from behind, only stopping once he reached Jack. The medics' shadow covered Jack's small projection.

"To answer your question, I believe June should be happy you are a logical enough person not to cause more harm with your anger. I believe you are asking this question proves how far you have come in forgiving her." Ratchet concluded.

"But what if she doesn't want to see me, it's been a while since. That day." Jack spluttered, spinning to face Ratchet. He craned his neck to search the old bots' optics for answers. All he received was a calm resolve that left Jack frozen. His thoughts spun, thinking of these past days. His treatment of his mom hadn't improved beyond the occasional reports courtesy of Arcee. Every word left him with more guilt each time.

Guilt and loneliness.

He missed his mom. He missed living with her, calling her, talking, cooking, and watching TV together.

Being on base has only amplified what he knew from the start. Jack could never be mad at his mom for long. Yes, she made a huge mistake, which she would feel remorseful about for a long time, but wasn't that punishment enough?

"She's your mother; even I can respect that despite everything." Ratchet huffed, turning around to get back to work. "Now, shoo. Arcee should be back soon from patrol; maybe you can take a ride." Ratchet suggested, making shooing movements with his servo. Jack smiled softly before taking him up on the offer.

"It may be a long ride," Jack yelled as he left.

"Good riddance." Came the gruff bots' response. Jack's smile bloomed into full freeing laughs. They echoed down the hall to the medic audio receptors, secretly smiling in his labs.


Arcee was shocked to see Jack out of Ratchets labs. Jack has become very stubborn in his attempt to hide from everyone. Acree had to force him to come out most time. Though she couldn't blame him, she would have been downright snappy if she was him. They were fortunate Jack had a better attitude than her any day.

"What's up? Usually, it's a chore to get you out." Arcee pursed her mouth, giving Jack a disapproving stare. His attitude recently wasn't what she would have expected from him. She never thought of him as a hermit, but she had been increasingly wrong as the weeks passed.

Jack smiled, completely ignoring her tone as he walked closer. The smile was less forceful than the others she saw, so she relaxed her stance only slightly.

Tilting her helm, she observed his posture. Jack stood straight, revealing the height he gained in his holo form. He looked older, nothing like the sixteen-year-old she had previously met.

"Kinda got kicked out by Ratchet." He replied, rubbing the back of his neck as he avoided her disbelieving expression. She could understand where the medic was coming from; Jack had an unsettling cloud of despair that cloaked him no matter his outward expression. Being exposed for too long can be a depressing experience. On the other servo, she was shocked Ratchet let him out of his sight. The medic was shockingly protective of Jack. Whether it be Ratchet knew about Jack before anyone else, or he indeed had a soft spark was a mystery to her.

She continued to observe Jack, watching him blankly glare down a wall in the distance. His eyebrows furrowed, and his mouth pulled thin in contemplation. Arcee waited for him to come out of his mind.

Jack was a quiet being who often observed and reacted once he thought it through. He was trying to come to an action, and she was confident the topic was one she knew well. She visited the very topic on her way back from patrol.

Anger filled her spark. It burned deep as we thought about everything. She tried to keep her emotions from affecting her relationships with Jack and his mother, but every visit added more frustration. She was angry about her partner's behavior; she was mad at Jack for ignoring his mother.

She was more furious with herself.

Pain lanced through her as she looked down at her servos.

She had let Jack slip and fall. She had caused everything to fall.

Ratchet said it himself, if Jack was left alone and not crushed by Megatron, he could have lived on as 'human.'

Now she had to look at her biggest regret every day, trapped in the base with him walking around looking different. The dark blue Autobot insignia stood out on Jack's right jacket shoulder. All the bots noticed it, but none have yet to ask. Instead, they offer words that only seem to grate on her partner's already frayed sanity. They weren't sure what else they could give.

"Arcee." Jack's clear voice echoed in the cavernous room. It even sounded deeper, she realized, with the pain solidifying into a pressure deep inside.

Arcee looked at him once more, closing her servos by her side. Jack flinched when their sights connected but pushed past the emotions he saw in her optics. Arcee was grateful for that small mercy.

"Can you take me to see my mom?"

Those words made a small smile flit over her features. Some of the pressure inside eased as she heard Jack ask. What Ratchet has been doing is working to help Jack better than she ever could.

She allowed her body to get caught up in transforming; instead of answering, she wasn't sure she could.

She felt Jack, comforting lightweight, settle on her seat, helmet hiding his face from view, though the design was different. Jack Darby was dead; they both didn't exist in the eyes of the public. She let her mind get consumed in her spiraling feelings as they drove the familiar path into town. They could have taken a bridge, but Arcee could tell Jack needed the time, and loath to admit so did she.

The grip on her handlebars tightened, their universal sign that he would talk. Careful, she tuned her receptors to hear him above the roaring wind.

"Thank Cee."

Her spark lightened, her field reaching out to stroke an electrically charged path over her charge. She felt him shiver and chuckle with the sensation.

"Nothing to thank, partner." She meant every word. Jack never needed to thank her. Instead, he should be asking for Arcee to be apologizing. She was the one who caused it all, with a slip of her servos.

'There is much I want to tell you, Jack, but nothing will ever encompass how sorry I am.' She lamented as a familiar home once more came into view. Slowing down, she pulled into the open garage, letting Jack slip off as the garage closed behind them. The sunset was cut off from perspective as the door shut with a cranky thud.

Transforming, she crouched low and looked at Jack's back, but he focused on the door leading inside. The very door June stood, tears slipping down her cheeks as mother and son continued the awkward, tension-filled stare down. She felt the urge to look away as if this emotional moment was sacred.

"Hey, mom." Arcee felt a warm sensation fill her with Jack's awkward greeting. Her charge would never change. It was something she needed to see with her optics.

June didn't care about the tears streaming down her face. Jack, her Jack, was standing before her. His face was pulled into a smile she knew was strained. Their eyes glowed with worry and a spark of guilt he shouldn't feel. She was the one who should be feeling those feelings.

Reaching out, she touched his arms. The solid feeling sparked more tears, choked sobs slipping past her guard.

Straining her neck, she meets his eyes. He had changed so much it was hard to connect the different appearances, but a mother could tell. He looked so much like her father. The sight made her heart bittersweet.

"Your so tall." She spluttered out, pulling his stiff frame into a hug. Hesitant arms circled her more petite frame, pulling them deeper together. Jack's face soon buried into her shoulder, her whole body feeling the tension drain from his body. It was just like before, but it wasn't.

"You did say I would be taller than you one day." His breath heated her hair, and the deep chuckle shook them. June tightened her hold.

"...yeah, I did, didn't I." She buried her face against his now broad chest, just like she once did with her father, a person her son had never met.

They stood there, absorbed in the moment. Enjoying the closeness, the closest they have been since before Unicron.

"Jack... Sorry. Please forgive me." She refused to move from her spot even as she felt Jack's grip loosen. Silence filled the space till a gentle touch on her hair caused her to look up. Jack's face came into view. Tears filled his eyes. A genuine smile took over his face. June followed as a tear moved down his cheek till it vanished to nothing right when it was about to drip off his face. Her son didn't seem to notice the difference, or he chose to ignore it.

Looking into Jack's eyes, blue and golden eyes that reminisced his optics, shown with sadness. They were nothing like her soft gray blues.

"I can't stay mad at you, mom. I knew you were hiding things, but I couldn't push you." His voice was vibrant as more false tears rolled down his face, only to disappear before each drip. "I was scared." He admitted, hanging his head. His ebony bangs hid his eyes from the sight and something June had seen many times before. The nostalgia caused more tears as she once more embraced her trembling son. His form was flickering now but remained solid to her tightening hug.

"So sorry; I love you so much, Jack. So, so much," June whispered.

"Me too, mom." Came the choked reply. She closed her eyes and listened, just like in a dark place she wished she had never been. The sound of her breathing filled the room. Sobs accompanied them as they both released their pent-up emotions. Arcee shifted in the distance, and June's heart hammered loudly in her ears. Despite being pressed against his chest, the one thing she didn't hear was a heartbeat.

Her son was no longer human. He never was, and it was something she would forever know was partly her fault. Even with the comforting proof of her failure, June could feel the lump of guilt and resentment lighten by simply having him back.

Megatron didn't win, and June would happily stand between him and Jack to keep it that way. After all, she was a parent.