IF: The World That Could Be
In between fragments, in countless possibilities. If the sword managed to reach him on time… Would there be a world where everyone could be happy?
Calla
"Daena, Daena! Have you woken up yet? It's morning!" Calla knocked on the door, lightly at first, then louder. "Daena, I can hear you! Don't pretend to be asleep!"
Her sister usually woke up quickly. Calla had no idea what was taking her so long… wait, this was not a prank, was it?
As the thought crossed her mind, she stopped knocking and put her ear on the door.
"Mmm!" growling came beyond the door… but that was… a man's voice?
Uh. This was not good. Calla frowned, then stepped backwards…
"Argh!" And rammed her body across the door!
"Ehk! What in the Seven Hells, Calla!" Daena screamed as Calla finally broke through the lock.
"Mmm!" That was… ah.
Daena tried to hide the man with her body but it was too late. Calla saw Prince Aerion Targaryen, in his usual bright red coat, tied on a chair with his mouth covered up. Violet eyes glared into the Blackfyre sisters, he made vaguely threatening noises that only highlighted his helplessness.
"Daena, what is going on?" Grimacing at the sight, Calla asked.
"Well, he…"
—
The breakfast table of House Blackfyre was less than half full, even with today's… special guest. It felt oddly empty these last few months.
But it could not be helped. Calla grew up surrounded by her brothers, and all but one of them had left the nest.
Aegon was in King Baelor's court, serving in Father's old position in the small council, while Aemon accepted Grandfather's invitation and was touring Tyrosh with his family. It felt unreal to think that Calla's inseparable elder brothers were so far apart, but time changed everything… They were adults with their own families now.
As for Calla's younger brothers, Daemon was in the Reach with his friends, and Haegon had just started to wear the white cloak a few months ago… he was in Dragonstone now, protecting Prince Valarr and his family. Viserys and Jaehaerys were with him as well, squiring for the prince.
Fortunately, whatever resentment Valarr had for her did not extend to her brothers. Calla was grateful for that.
Aenys… he was glancing at Aerion and Daena with a mischievous gleam in his eyes. "I was wondering what kept you so busy during the last months, Daena. Turns out you've learned something from the wildlings beyond the Wall?"
...Calla doubted anyone aside from Aerion would be ignorant of what Aenys was hinting at, for they all heard about that custom from Father's campaign. Daena glared at him. "You're not the one to talk. Last time you took Selyse back and told us you had secured a betrothal…"
Mother was massaging her temple, her long, bright blue curly hair flowing as she shook her head tiredly. "Daena, sweetie, Aenys had negotiated with Lord Peake while you eloped with a prince without getting any approval. Not with us, nor with Prince Maekar."
The years in Westeros had not changed the colour of hair dye Rohanne of Tyrosh used, but it had taught her one important lesson: there was no way to rein in her youngest daughter, the wild, unpredictable Daena Blackfyre. When Daena was younger Mother had tried all sorts of ways to stop her pranks, but now she had given up… All she could do was to advise Daena kindly and hope that she would listen.
And from the smile Daena had, Calla knew that she did not hear a word Mother said.
Aerion snorted, "As if my father wants to hear about me. And why am I not hearing any blessings for us? I'm a Targaryen, you couldn't have found any better match for your daughter." Since they had taken off his restraint— Calla did not want to ask about that part— all he did was make snippy comments. He did not deny the story Daena told them, but Calla could tell that there was more behind the tale...
"Aerion, my love," Daena cooed, "Open your mouth." She took a spoonful of food in her hand. Aerion complied, looking pleased with himself— then Daena stuck the spoon into his throat.
Coughing and retching to remove the spoon, Aerion was forcibly silenced. Brutal, Daena, brutal. Calla turned away from the sight of Aerion, wanting to enjoy her meal in peace.
"This is disgusting, Daena, couldn't you have found another way to shut him up?" Aenys complained, grimacing.
"Oh, he'll be fine, don't worry," Daena dismissed Aenys with a hand wave, smirking.
"I'm concerned about our breakfast, not your new favourite toy." Aenys rolled his eyes.
Watching the scene unfold, Mother let out a long sigh, looking at Father pointedly. Daemon Blackfyre coughed under the pressure of his wife's gaze, quickly reaching out one hand towards Mother's shoulders to comfort her. "We need to travel to Summerhall as soon as possible. Maekar must be worried sick."
"He… he won't care…" coughing, Aerion squeezed out, "Most of the time… I wasn't in Summerhall…"
"But you must have servants and guards with you usually?" Calla pointed out. Aerion Brightflame had notable notoriety… She thought Prince Maekar would not allow him to run around without protection.
Aerion's face twisted, glaring at her— but then Daena pinched him, and he reluctantly nodded.
Frowning, Father's gaze turned serious, "This must be handled with caution. If not… this might turn into a huge scandal and political crisis. If Maekar thinks that we've done anything to his son—"
"Lord Blackfyre," a servant came running, "Prince Maekar and his sons were just outside the gates."
—
The atmosphere was tense as Father and Prince Maekar sat face to face across the table. Father wore a polite smile, but it was wearing out as Maekar continued to stay silent. Maekar's sons, Aemon and Aegon, sat beside their father, their brows knitted and lips pursed.
Sitting next to her mother, Calla kept her expression neutral, but she was worried as well. In a panic, they had told Daena and Aerion to hide, but Prince Maekar would know the truth sooner or later… Gods, if this was not handled well it would be a diplomatic disaster for House Blackfyre. Calla did not want any more conflicts with the Targaryens.
"…I'm honoured by your visit, but what brought you to the Blackfyre Keep, my prince?" Father finally asked, his tone respectful but guarded. Unlike Father's relationship with King Baelor, Father and Prince Maekar were never friends. The youngest son of the Old King was a cold, private man with a few words, and to Calla's memories, he had never visited Blackfyre Keep before.
"It's about my son," Maekar said, "Aerion." He turned to nod at Aegon and barked, "Go on, tell Lord Blackfyre what you heard."
The young boy lowered his head. "Recently, Aerion has been talking about his marriage prospects. He has been boasting about how he would do the thing our cousins all failed to do, to charm and marry a Blackfyre… and a few days ago, I saw him in the shadier part of the city, purchasing potions. I didn't think deeply about it at the time, but he has gone missing since, and when I told Aemon he recognised that what he brought was used for seduction…"
Seduction… Daena was too shrewd to fall for such an underhanded trick. So she defeated the prince and tied him up instead? But ultimately, she must have taken a liking to him to agree to the marriage.
Daena excelled in many things, but she had a bad taste in men.
A wry smile appeared on Father's face as he shared a glance with Mother, whose expression mirrored his own. "So you want to know if my daughter is at home?"
"We ride here as soon as I have heard," Maekar sighed, "Daemon, I sincerely hope that he hasn't run off with any of your daughters. I see Calla is here. Is Daena home as well? If she is, I won't bother you further."
Father and Mother looked at each other again, frowning, at loss at how to deal with the situation. "Maekar," at last, Father said, "My daughters are both at home. But there's something you should know."
"Your son is here as well," Mother said.
"Aerion is— Has he… done anything?" Maekar asked, a hint of worry in his voice.
Massaging her temple and sighing, Mother ordered, "Let them in."
Aerion and Daena walked into the room, hand in hand. "We're married!" Aerion announced to his father, wearing the smuggest smile imaginable.
Maekar's facial muscles twitched. "Excuse me, Daemon, Aerion and I must speak privately."
—
"I truly apologise for everything my son has done," Maekar said to Father, after scolding Aerion thoroughly, "He's a disgrace to House Targaryen. As his father, I bear all responsibility for his actions. As for the compensation for Daena's virtue…"
"My daughter said she elope with him willingly, Maekar," Father sighed, "I doubt she's under the effect of any drugs when she told me this in the morning. And even now…"
"We're in love," Daena said cheerfully, "I need no compensation but Aerion's company."
Aerion looked pleased with himself as Daena leaned towards him, holding his arm. One side of Maekar's eyelid jumped, and he turned to ask his younger son, "Aemon, do you know how long the potion lasts?"
Aemon looked green as he answered, "The potion's effect shouldn't be able to last for so long… and besides, someone under the effect of the potion shouldn't be able to speak normally."
"That means… She's saying this of her own will?" Aegon whispered, "I feel sick."
Maekar glared at his youngest son before turning back to Father. "What do you propose then, Daemon?"
"You heard what Daena claimed, they're in love. I can't punish them," Father said tiredly, "For all means and purposes, they have consummated their marriage. It's better to have them marry in public quickly lest Daena conceives and it shows."
"If you're willing, it's indeed the best solution," Maekar's face was still hard, "I shall punish my son… privately."
Father laughed, "Remember the betrothal you once proposed to me?" he asked, "The one between Aerion and Daena?"
That was news to Calla. After the numerous failed attempts to betroth Calla to one of the Targaryens, they had been hesitant to suggest matches for Daena. So when did that happen?
"That was a long time ago, years before you even got your magic sword," Maekar said, "You rejected it anyhow."
…Before Father got Crystal. That was, indeed, a long while ago.
Father was always popular and a highly regarded warrior, but it was only after he received the magical sword that he became a true legend. With the support of the crown, he fought off the monster lurking beyond the Wall and saved the North, establishing himself as a mythical hero.
It was the start of the friendship between Father and the Prince, now King, Baelor as well. After the war beyond the wall, Father had returned the sword Blackfyre to the king, and the match King Daeron had in turn suggested was far greater than one between Aerion and Daena.
"Because they were both too young to be considered for marriage, yes," Father smiled wryly, "But it seems they're always meant to be together."
Perhaps they are, and it's for the best of everyone, Calla thought. At least one of us is going to marry a Targaryen.
—
"…And so that's why your parents are away," Uncle Aegor concluded, shaking his head, "They went to Summerhall to prepare for the wedding."
Calla had remained at home for this exact purpose: to receive potential visitors. Uncle Aegor frequently visited Blackfyre Keep, sometimes to discuss politics in King's Landing, sometimes just to invite Father for a hunt. Calla was used to accompanying them.
"King's Landing, actually. Father said the wedding could be held there, to promote Targaryen-Blackfyre unity," she explained, "They went to see the King for his blessing."
"Oh, Baelor has been hoping for a Targaryen-Blackfyre marriage for a long while. He won't refuse your father's request," Uncle Aegor snorted, but then the corners of his mouth lifted, "This is for the best. Daemon has been worrying about you lot's future, and Daena is the one who gives him the most headaches. Now that she's wed, he can finally be at ease."
"I thought it's me that Father is most worried about," Calla said.
"Ha! You jest. You were the most obedient child since but a babe. If your mother orders your siblings to stay at the same place for an hour, you'll be the only one who never attempts to sneak away," Uncle Aegor's voice turned nostalgic, "I heard Daemon and Rohanne complain about the boys and Daena a lot throughout the years, but never you."
That was high praise, but Calla was not convinced. Quietly, she questioned, "Not even when I refused to wed Prince Valarr?"
A marriage between her and the current Prince of Dragonstone, heir to the Iron Throne—
Back when King Daeron was still alive, he had wanted to betroth his grandson to a Blackfyre very badly. Father and Mother were happy to comply, seeing no problem with the match. Valarr was three years Calla's elder, and Calla and he had gotten along well. One day, she would be the queen of the Seven Kingdoms… There was no downside to the match.
Except that Calla denied marrying Valarr. Firmly. Without any reason given. The argument lasted for a whole year, with every Targaryen in Calla's generation having once offered to her, and King Daeron himself meeting Calla just to convince her to marry his grandson.
King Daeron was a pervasive speaker with both iron hand and velvet glove hidden in his words, but not even he could move Calla. She remained unmarried until today, while Valarr has moved on and wed another noble girl, having noted to say that he did not want to pursue another Blackfyre girl, ever. Targaryen-Blackfyre relationship had been tense for a few years after that.
Calla was sure that it was her fault.
Uncle Aegor raised a brow, seemingly surprised that she would bring up the topic. "It was quite a headache to deal with Daeron's demand, but that wasn't your fault. What could we do, forced you to attend the wedding and said your wedding vows for you? If you're so unwilling, then there's nothing to be done. It simply won't work out."
His forthrightness made Calla's eyes widen. "But… to this day, I don't even know why I'm so unwilling. I don't hate Valarr, I just feel that I can't be his wife…"
"And you refused every betrothal Daemon and Rohanne have tried to make for you ever since," Aegor continued, and Calla nodded, lowering her head. Every time her parents arranged matches for her, she felt like retching. Deep inside her skin, there was an immovable force stopping her from marrying.
As if she had already…
"Is there someone you like that you know your parents won't allow you to wed? Some lowborn serving boy?" Uncle Aegor asked knowingly and added, "I won't tell your parents if you tell me."
Calla smiled wryly. If that were the case, everything would be much simpler. "No, I don't have a secret lover. Or even anyone I have taken a fancy of."
"Then…" Uncle Aegor frowned, "perhaps you're similar to Shiera."
"Aunt Shiera?" Calla blinked, "But… doesn't she and Uncle Brynden…"
"She never married him, now did she?" Uncle Aegor huffed, and Calla grimaced. She probably should not mention the failed romance between them… old wounds still hurt, it seemed.
The love triangle between Calla's aunt and uncles was infamous, but Calla would think that Uncle Aegor had gotten over it. He worked in the same small council Uncle Brynden did for the last decade, after all. If they still maintain their rivalry, Calla was sure she would have heard about it…
As she frowned, Uncle Aegor's expression changed, "See how worried you look," he smiled, "Shiera and I understand each other. Brynden as well… although he's persistent in giving Shiera a family. As if he knows better than her what's best. Arrogant bastard," although his words were harsh, his tone was affectionate. "But Shiera is just like you. She has never fancied anyone and she never will."
Calla mused. While it was comforting to know that her beautiful aunt, rumoured to have many lovers, was actually similar to her, she felt that something was still… missing. "I don't know… I feel that it's not the same situation…"
Uncle Aegor frowned. "How is it different?"
"I… can't pinpoint exactly what. It's hard to explain…" Calla knew how ridiculous she sounded, but she could feel that it was different. She was not like Aunt Shiera. She was just… just…
"Forget about it," carefully observing her expression, Uncle Aegor sighed, "With Daena marrying a Targaryen, there's no reason for you to worry about marriage. Your family can provide for you for the rest of your life. More importantly…"
Peering into her eyes, he asked, "Calla. Are you… happy? About your current life?"
A deep pain came from Calla's heart. Her breathing stopped. For some reason, her eyes welled up.
But moments later, she smiled.
"Of course. This is the life... where I could have wanted nothing more."
"Then that's fine," Uncle Aegor said with a gentle smile he reserved for family, "I'll talk to your parents so that they won't arrange more matches for you. All Daemon wants to know is your true feelings on the matter."
Oh, Calla thought, so Father asked Uncle Aegor to discuss this with me?
She felt somewhat disappointed at first, but then a feeling of relief washed over her. This is fine.
This is my family. The best thing in my life.
—
"Father," after her parents had returned, Calla went to her father's solar and said, "If you want to know about my feelings on marriage… I don't think I would ever wed. I'm sorry."
Daemon Blackfyre smiled wryly at his eldest daughter behind the seat. "Aegor has asked you?"
She nodded.
"So be it, Calla. You have your own life and we're available to provide for you no matter what you want to do," he pointed at the visitor's chair, "You can sit."
Calla's brows knitted as she sat down, an awkward smile hanging on her face. She felt guilty telling this to her father, after all, her vague feelings were no real reason. "Father—"
"It doesn't matter, truly. Our position in the realm is secured and you won't be the first lady in the realm who doesn't wed. Never did your grandmother, in fact," Father laughed fondly as he mentioned his own mother, "Except with King Baelor— the first one— but of course, that wasn't a real marriage."
Calla looked at her father. "I thought Grandmother... Princess Daena wanted to wed, it's just that King Baelor put her in the maidenvault?" she phrased the question carefully. When it concerned her grandparents, there were too many mysteries Calla never learned of, for it was not a safe topic to bring up in court. For peace, something was better left forgotten.
"She did. For the longest time, she thought... my father would eventually marry her." Father shook his head briefly when King Aegon was brought up. The smile he held for him was more bitter than joy. "But that hope turned to disappointment as time passed. When my father died, he had asked her to his bedside and begged for her forgiveness, but he never heard her answer. It's only after that... that she was content."
"Content?" Calla repeated, confused. Daena Targaryen's life was full of regret, without being able to achieve what she wanted, and she could not even forgive or condemn the one that hurt her the most. Why would she be content?
"Mother told me, as I'm going to tell you now," Father's voice turned slow and soft, "We... humans... will only choose the path that is the best for ourselves."
Calla frowned. She did not understand where this was coming from.
"We made our choices by deciding what is best for us. Even when we look back at the past and see something we regret, we can't do it over. The past is just a dream we remember vividly, at this point."
"Ah," Calla nodded. She finally got some of it.
"That's why no matter how much you regret something, it's meaningless. As your father, what I want from you… is for you to seek happiness in the choices you have made," Father smiled warmly, "...Do you get it? Did I explain it clearly?"
"Yes. I think."
"Then it's good," he said.
After Calla left Father's solar, she pondered on his words. She thought of Aegor's question.
"What I want from you... is for you to seek happiness in the choices you have made."
"Calla... are you happy?"
Her teeth clenched as she tasted those lines. Her eyes went red as she looked into her heart.
...But of course, the answer was the same.
"I'm very happy. This is the life... where I could have wanted nothing more."
That was why she... did not have any regrets. If Daemon's words were to have any effect, perhaps it would be more suitable for another her, in another life.
—
At night, Calla closed her eyes. This was a slightly unusual day in her daily life. But tomorrow, things will return to normal.
Her parents would manage the day-to-day affairs of the Blackfyre Keep. Her brothers would spend their days in Westeros or Essos, fulfilling their respective wishes. Daena would drag Aerion around as she prepared for their marriage. Uncle Aegor would be in King's Landing, fulfilling his duty as part of the small council. Westeros would be at peace, and the lands beyond the Wall will eventually be habitable again. As for Calla, she would be on her parents' side, doing whatever chores that came up.
But there was nothing to be unhappy about, none at all.
Because her daily life was more precious than anything.
Knowing this, she prayed before she fell asleep.
Hoping that every day would be peaceful and wonderful.
Hoping that this world would never change…
