A/N: Thank you for the reviews. As I'm planning the chapters and plot line, I'm finding this story may be a lot longer than I anticipated. I hope you'll come along for the ride :)
TW: offensive language
Chapter 4
Derek awoke the next morning to an empty bed. The sun had risen, and he could hear his alarm clock going off from down the hall. He climbed out of bed and made his way back to the guest room that had been prepared for him.
Addison had concerned him enough last night for him to disregard her request that he stay in the guest room. He had been absent for too long, both emotionally and physically. That had started long before her and Mark, not that it excused what they had done to him, but he wouldn't be absent now. He said he would try in their marriage, and she needed him, even if she couldn't bring herself to admit it anymore.
Still in his pajama pants and bare chest, he strode down the hall with his suitcase in tow and dropped it off in Addison's room. Now, he could get ready.
It wasn't until he stepped out of the bedroom, hair damp but fully dressed, that he heard the commotion downstairs.
He padded down the stairs towards the familiar voices in the kitchen. When he rounded the corner, Amelia was the first person to greet him, followed by Archer and finally the Captain. Addison was nowhere to be seen.
"Hey Bro," Amelia gave him a crooked grin from behind her coffee mug. His sisters had always taken a liking to Addison, even after the Mark debacle, they loved her through and through. He knew how much they meant to her as well. He was suddenly worried that his other sisters were somewhere lurking in the house.
Archer used his forearms to push himself up onto the countertop, where he sat like a child. "Good of you to join us," he smiled and bit into an apple, sending specks of juice flying in every direction.
The Captain merely nodded at him, nursing what Derek could only guess was a coffee mug full of liqueur. His eyes were clouded over as he studied the contents of his coffee mug.
"Captain, I'm so sorry for your loss," Derek strode over to him and stuck his hand out.
The Captain shook his hand firmly and curtly thanked him. He was already dressed in a starched suit with gold plated cuff links secured to the sleeves.
"Derek, I need to talk to you," Amelia said as she grabbed his arm and dragged him out of the room.
"What are you doing?" She whispered angrily once they were out of earshot.
"I'm attending my mother-in-law's funeral, what are you doing, Amelia?"
She pointed a finger in his face. "I've seen Addison. She's a mess. And you're going to make it worse. You always do."
"Well, thanks for the vote of confidence, but you do remember it was Addison that cheated and ruined our marriage, not me, right?"
"She may have slept with Mark, but I'd hardly say she was the one that ruined your marriage. I was there, or don't you remember? I saw how you neglected that poor woman. She somehow managed to make it to all of the holiday events, while you were doing whatever you wanted to do with no regard for anyone else!"
"Lower your voice," he warned.
Amelia whispered carefully. "I saw her crying when she thought no one was looking so many times, Derek. You were never there. She was so lonely. No wonder the first guy that gave her attention took advantage. That guy just happened to be your best friend."
"I don't want to hear this right now," Derek turned to look over his shoulder.
"You never do," she grabbed his arm again to regain his attention. "Step it up. She's making the effort and her mom, if you could call her that, just died."
He looked Amelia straight in the eye. "I am trying now. I mean it. I know this is… complicated and painful for her. She's pushing me away now if anything."
"And who's fault is that?" She challenged. "Don't you dare give up on her right now."
"I won't," he promised.
As the morning stretched on, family and friends filtered in for the reception until the house was lively with chatter, h'dourves and drinks.
Addison stood in the bathroom, adjusting her pearls to hang perfectly against her neckline and dabbing on another layer of concealer to cover the bruise around her eye. She couldn't keep the lights dimmed around the house now and her nerves buzzed at the idea that someone would notice, but she couldn't stay in the bathroom much longer or else people would begin to miss her.
She swallowed the remaining wine in her glass just as she heard someone rapping on her bedroom door. She opened it to reveal Naomi on the other side.
"Addie," she said lovingly as she embraced her old friend. She leaned back and held Addison at arm's length, eyeing her carefully. "How are you doing?"
"As best as I can be," Addison smiled and patted her friend on the back. "Let's join the others."
"So, where's Derek?" Naomi asked as they descended the stairs. Bodies migrated around the house, some Addison recognized, some she didn't.
"There," she replied and pointed upon spotting his dark curls next to Weiss and Sav.
Naomi squinted. "Is that Weiss and Sav? God, I haven't seen them in ages."
Addison didn't respond as they walked over to them. She wondered what Derek and the two of them had been talking about because as soon as they joined the small circle, the three of them fell silent.
"Weiss, Sav, how are you?" Addison greeted them like the perfect hostess, kissing them on either side of their cheeks. "I'm so glad you could make it." She stood tall, despite feeling Derek's eyes comb over her. She had successfully avoided him all morning so there would be no time for questions about the night before.
"Addison, it's so good to see you. I hate it's under these circumstances. I'm so sorry for your loss." Sav hugged her and spoke low so that it was kept in the small circle of old friends. "It was so sudden. And right after Susan? I just can't believe it."
Addison was looking somewhere off into the distance. "She was heartbroken after Susan; however, she lived a successful and admirable life. Excuse me please," she politely brushed past the four of them, making a beeline for the wet bar.
She could hear Sav murmur behind her, "What was all that about?"
A familiar broad-shouldered man stepped in front of her path, blocking her view of the liquors and wines just as she was approaching them.
She looked up to find none other than Mark Sloan staring back at her. "Mark, what are you doing here?" She quickly looked over her shoulder to find Derek still in the throes of conversation with Weiss, Sav and Naomi. She dragged him off to the side hastily, behind a crowd of people. "You need to go. Now."
"Addison, I was close to Bizzy too. And I know what she put you through. I want to be here for you." Mark looked her over, concern flashing in his eyes. "You've lost weight," he noted.
"No one was close to Bizzy and my husband is here for me, Mark. We've done enough damage. You need to go." Addison looked around nervously.
Mark leaned in closer, eyes as sharp as tacks. "Is that a black eye?"
Addison tried to push him away. "Stop, please. Today is supposed to be about Bizzy and that can't happen if you and Derek are in the same house."
But Mark didn't hear a word she had said. "Did Derek do that to you?" He spit out angrily. "I'll fucking kill him." He stood on his toes, peering over the heads of everyone to pick out Derek.
"Mark!" She grabbed him, trying to calm him down. "It wasn't Derek, I swear." But it was too late.
Mark was storming through the groups of people, Addison on his tail.
"Stop!" She shouted, just in time for Derek to turn around and see the two of them charging at him.
Mark gripped Derek by the collar. "We're taking this outside."
Derek shoved him off and locked his jaw. "Fine by me."
Addison could see the muscles flexing in Derek's arm and she pleaded with the two of them to no avail. The front door swung open and the two of them walked down to the front yard, snow crunching behind them.
"Stop this, both of you!" Nancy yelled, appearing out of nowhere. She placed her hands on Addison's shoulders, silently telling her to stay back. "You're going to cause a scene at her mother's funeral. Stop acting like children."
"Oh, we're beyond that," Mark gritted through his teeth. "You put your hands on Addison and I'll break your neck. I don't care who you are." His eyes shone red with anger as he drew his hands into tight fists.
Derek abruptly stood back, confused. "What are you talking about? Who put their hands on Addison?" He looked at her now and then back to Mark, causing Mark to fumble and look at Addison for answers as well.
Derek forgot about Mark and jogged over to his wife. "Someone hit you?" He scanned her face and saw the faintest purple hue and swell around her eye. Anger bubbled up inside of him and he tried to catch her eye. She was looking everywhere but at him.
"Addison, look at me." Derek said sternly. He felt Mark behind him, expecting answers as well. Derek looked over his shoulder at the person he used to consider his best friend. "Back the fuck off, Mark."
"Don't bark at me for not paying attention to your wife again," he said in defense.
Derek suddenly reared back and decked Mark in the face, sending him stumbling back until he fell on his backside. He found his footing quickly and moved like lightning over to Derek to even out the damage, but Nancy grabbed the back of his shirt and pulled him to stand next to her. "Don't," she demanded. "You're coming with me and don't you dare try anything else."
The two of them disappeared around the side of the house leaving Derek and Addison alone again.
Derek could feel a buildup of tears behind his eyes, though he wasn't sure if they were from anger or pain for Addison.
"Addie, who did this?" He kissed the top of her forehead, letting his lips linger there as he waited for her to tell him, but she remained silent. "Addie, please," he begged quietly.
She looked up at him, pain evident in her hollow eyes. "It doesn't matter, Derek. Can we just focus on Bizzy today?"
"No, we can't." He held her arms gently. "I need to know who hurt you. Was it someone here?" He looked past her to the front door, imagining who might have laid a hand on his wife on the other side.
"You don't even want to be with me, Derek. I can deal with things on my own. I've managed my whole life and I can manage now."
"I do want to be with you. And you don't have to deal with things on your own. I'm here and I'm not going anywhere."
"But you will," she whispered sadly.
"What was that?" He leaned in closer to hear, but she only looked down at the snow.
"I think I should lie down," she offered instead, feeling the wine rush to her head.
"I'll help you to your room." He didn't give her time to argue with him. He placed a protective arm around her mid and led her into the house.
"Kitten," the Captain slurred once they were through the door.
Derek steered her away from her father and called over his shoulder to him, "Addison is going to lie down for a little while."
"Too much wine, Kitten," the Captain said a little too loudly before turning back to his audience.
Addison let Derek guide her to the bed and sit her down before squatting in front of her.
"Addison, tell me. Who hurt you?"
"They didn't hurt me." She looked down at her hands as she twisted her wedding bands around her ring finger, wishing they would tighten so that she could feel something other than numb in this moment.
"You have a black eye. Someone hurt you. I need to know who it was and what happened."
"They didn't hurt me because I don't feel anything anymore," she stated, ice dripping off her silver tongue. She lifted her head to look him square in the eye.
So many unspoken things were held there in those blue eyes, and neither one of them knew how to talk about any of it out loud.
He turned her arms over and she tried to pull them free before he could see the bruises, but it was too late. He was rubbing at the makeup she had applied until faint blue and yellow bruises were visible.
"God damn it, Addie. Who did this?" Unshed tears glistened in his eyes, and he wiped at them angrily with the back of his hand.
"I don't know," she nearly shouted back, frustration and embarrassment apparent in her tone. She was shocked to see tears of her own falling now and disappearing into the fabric of her dress.
Derek climbed on top of the bed next to her and pulled her against his chest where he held her for what felt like an eternity, sharing tears and heartache.
"I wasn't there for you," he whispered as he kissed the side of her head over and over, inhaling her scent more with each kiss. "I'm so sorry I wasn't there."
"It was my fault," Addison said, her voice laced with emotion. "I just, I don't want to talk about it, Derek. I don't know how to. Not with Bizzy and everyone here. I can't take it. I can't-" She placed the back of her hand over her mouth, feeling sick and unable to find the right words anymore.
"Shh," Derek whispered and held her closer. "It's okay, Addie. It's not your fault, I promise."
Addison could feel the cracks forming in the foundation of her carefully built walls. Even with her best efforts, Derek was still able to tear them all down. Emotions she had been able to bottle up for days came pouring out in sobs, wracking her body until she had doubled over. Her lungs cramped and begged for air, but she could only release.
Derek held her, rocking her as she finally released all the pain she had harbored in her heart and mind. "Take a breath, Addie."
"All of it is my fault," She strained out and shook her head, as though it would shake free the images of Mark in her bed, Derek's face when he threw her out of their house, Meredith laughing at her husband's joke, the tanned man ripping at her clothes and her mother's stone eyes staring back at her. "You weren't supposed to know. This is what I get, right? This is what I deserve. I can't take anymore, Derek. I feel like I'm falling apart."
"Addie, no. Stop thinking like that. None of this is your fault. None of it, do you hear me? You didn't do anything to deserve this." Derek could feel her fingernails digging into his biceps, clinging to something tangible. "I've got you, Honey. I've got you."
He continued to rock her until her tears subsided and she could catch her breath. They fell into a comfortable silence, but he could feel Addison becoming antsy with adrenaline.
"I've got to give Bizzy's eulogy." She tried to stand, but Derek held her in place gently.
"We've got time." He folded her hand into his. "Stay with me awhile."
She looked up at him through hooded lids that had a pink puffiness to them now.
She nodded slowly before leaning back against him.
He gathered her in his arms and moved them back to rest against the headboard until it was time to rejoin the others.
Ch.5 coming soon.
