Chapter 46.
Family time that night felt like exactly that. Sam felt that everyone was on the same page about everything and there were no lurking misunderstandings waiting to tear them apart.
Charlie was excited about a future she had never imagined for herself and Dean sat next to Anael, with Cas and Jules opposite, looking as if he had finally balanced his angels. Sam could now feel a lot less guilty about having the kind of good relationship they had missed out on.
Now that everyone he cared about was finding what they wanted, he could enjoy what he had with Eileen and the child he already loved. Best of all, Dean seemed likely to make things work with Anael without losing Castiel's friendship. That was important, because Dean owed Cas a lot more than he owed Anael and although he clearly loved her, it would be best for all concerned if it wasn't a choice he had to make.
Jules kept looking at Sam and her face told him she was thinking the same thing. The bunker folk and Sarah were the only family she had and she loved it when they were in harmony.
He nodded to Jules and turned to Eileen, who was perched on the table, sipping her hot chocolate. Her bright, beautiful eyes sparkled and she smiled behind her cup. Non-verbal declarations of love were a speciality of hers and that one was wonderfully clear and unequivocal.
"I love you." he said, "I love you and I love the huntlng. I'm the luckiest man alive."
She put down her cup and grinned at him. "Has Dean been spiking your chocolate with something stronger?"
"A man doesn't have to be drunk to be in love with you." He said.
"That's true," said Dean, "I've been in love with you since we met." Both he and Sam realised at the same time how that might sound to a very literal angel and tey turned as one to look at Anael.
To Sam's relief, her response was amusement. "I bet I know what you think I thought." she said to Dean, "But it turns out, I'm not as unsophisticated as you thought and I know your sense of humour."
"I promise," said Dean, "That unsophisticated is not a word I would ever associate with you, but sometimes, angels can't tell when I'm joking."
"Mostly me." said Cas.
"No, not mostly you, it's just that you're the one I joke with the most, because we're friends."
"I think I'm getting better at getting the jokes." said Cas hopefully.
"You are," said Dean, "You even tell some sometimes and that's great and Anael jokes too, so maybe I shouldn't underestimate her."
"No, you shouldn't." she said, "Like I'd be stupid enough to believe Dean Winchester would express his true feelings."
Sam laughed. "Yeah, she has you there." he said.
Den looked at her thoughtfully for a moment, then he said, "Yeah, she has me. How long she'll want me, I don't know."
"Angels tend to think in terms of eternity." said Cas. He gave Jules a litte grin.
"So do I." she said, making the grin a little broader.
"You two are cute." said Charlie, "Like, Hallmark cute."
"Be careul," said Jules, "Or we'll point out how cute you and Lydia are."
"Well, that doesn't bother me." Said Charlie, "Because we are fracking cute. We're Dean's smile and Sa's laugh cute. We're baby Hobbit in an Ewok costume cute and I don't care who knows it. I've always owned who and what I am and it turns out that I am a romantic."
"Just needed to find the right hot librarian?" said Dean.
"Looks that way, doesn't it?" she said.
"By the way, nothing is as cute as my smile." he said.
"Well, we are, so suck it up." she said.
"Actually, they are," said Sam, "And I think you were always a romantic, Charlie. The Queen of Moondor could hardly be anything else. You always believed in love and honour and fidelity, just like Dean has, but like Dean, you never thought you'd get a share of it."
"But she did," said Dean.
"Yeah, she did." Said Sam. He knew his brother too well to think he had missed the point and he also knew him too well to push it. However much he wanted to shake Anael and Dean until they were honest abut their feelings, that was not the way to go.
Then Dean surprised him. He looked at Anael and said, "Hope for us all." It sounded casual and he smiled as he said it, but Sam knew from what deep-buried depth he had dragged it and through what arrays of defences and he was impressed and proud of Dean. He said nothing about that, not wanting to make Dean doubt himself or backtrack.
Dean and Anael continued to look into each other's eyes for a while and it seemed best to Sam to let them have their own little silent declarations. From what Anael had said previously, it was clear that she new where she stood. She knew tht it was not that Dean felt nothing or even that he was still fighting his feelings. He simply did''t know what to do with them and burying them until they emerged in bouts of homicidal rage or reckless consumption of alcohol was not going to help this time, if it ever had.
Sam turned his attention to his own partner. Even in hunter's garb, she looked amazing to him. Her long, soft hair fell elegantly down her shoulders and he didn't even care that she stole his conditioner to achieve that softness. She was holding her cup in both hands now and the rings on her fingers reflected the library lights, two rings, the one that had marked their engagement and the one that had sealed their wedding,
"How are you feeling?" he said, "Not tred, or anything?"
She was always very kind about his concern, knowing that it came from a long history of losing the people he lovd. His protective nature might have clashed badly with her independent one, except that she understood his reasons for feeling that way and he knew when to back off and trust that she was as able as he was to protect herself. It wasn't about her being deaf or a woman, it was merely that the thought of harm to her was unbearable.
"I think it should be a while before I suffer any of the effects of pregnancy." she said, "If anything, I feel energised and excited." She grinned and said, "I am getting a craving, though."
"Whatever you want." Sam promised.
"It's very specific."
"Whatever it is, you can have it." he said.
"Good. It's well over six foot and dressed in flannel."
"I think I can provide that." he said,
"Early night?" she said.
"Plenty of rest is so important." He said.
"I'm sure we'll get to that eventually." she said.
"No hurry." said Sam, taking her now empty cup from her hands and puttng it on the table.
"Goodnight." said Eileen to those assembled.
"Sounds like it will be for Sam." Said Dean.
