If I had a Chance
raven1295
A/ N: I do not own Transformers, just my OCs.
Avi's POV
I'm so tired. Feels like I've been sleeping forever. Where am I? I can't tell. Everything is pitch black. Am I dead? No, I can't be. Eva... Come on Avi, wake up! Do it! Get up! WAKE UP!
Slowly opening my eyes, everything was blurry. I was in no mood to rush, so I lay on a bed and waited until my vision can back to me. There was a beeping sound near me on my right. Both arms felt heavy. I tried to speak but something was in my mouth. I can't. There's that medical mask that is giving me oxygen. Looking over to my right, there was a life machine. Next to it was someone sleeping at the foot of the bed. Their head resting on their forearms. I can't tell who it was. However, this person had blonde hair. Looking to my left, I spot Jazz's holoform sitting in a chair, asleep.
I'm in the med bay? The last time I checked, the Fallen had me. The matrix turned red; I was in unbearable pain, and the Fallen was the last thing I saw before blacking out. I guess Optimus kicked his ass after all. Yay... I would be more energetic. Unfortunately, I'm so tired. Even in my head, I don't have the energy. This sucks. My dry throat caused me to cough a fit, startling Jazz.
"Bee?" He yawns while rubbing his eyes. The moment he notices me staring at him, he jumps out of the chair and is by my side in a second. He grabs my hand before waking the other person sleeping on the other side of us.
"Bee!" He yells. "Bee get up. Avi's awake." Bumblebee wakes up and turns to see me awake. He jumps up, forgetting he was sleeping a few seconds ago, and tries to hug me when Jazz stops him. Both Autobots turn their attention to me. Jazz takes my left hand while Bumblebee takes my right. "Avi, can you hear me?" He asks. I only blinked at him, since the mask covered my mouth. Using what energy I had, I lightly squeezed his hand in response. He smiled with a sigh of relief. My eyes continue to look around to notice Ratchet isn't here.
"Don't worry Avi. Ratchet is on his way." I could only slowly blink at Jazz. He held onto my hand for dear life. I can't imagine how he feels right now. Judging by his tired eyes, he's barely slept. With everything that's happened, I wasn't mad at him anymore. I'm tired of being angry, I'm tired of being alone, I'm tired of it all. Why am I trying so hard to keep these walls up when what I've always wanted was right in front of me? I can't. No more.
'Avianna.' Looking next to Jazz, I could see Solus standing there. Why does she look concerned? With a wave of her hand, sleep was taking over me again.
"Avi? Avi!" Jazz's voice fades for a moment before I opened my eyes again. This time I was standing next to Bee. Well, spiritually is more like it. I could sway my body. I wasn't hooked up to a machine. "Avi! Avi! Where's Ratchet?!" Jazz frantically asked Bee. My chest tightened to see Jazz in this state. Walking up to him, and he was focused on me, holding onto my hand.
"Baby girl." He whispers. Looking at him, displayed the pain in his eyes. "I forgive you," I told him even though he couldn't hear me. Solus slowly came forward to get a good look at me.
"Avianna?" I turn to her with my eyes misting. My throat burned with the feeling of needles pricking me. We exchanged no words at that point. She came closer, only to pull me in a big hug.
'You're alright. Thank Primus.' At that point, I hug her back as I cried. The emotions became too overwhelming. I thought I was dead. Luckily, I'm not. I'm here with the Autobots, with Solus. However, my best friend is gone and I couldn't save her. The insufferable hole inside hurts too much for me to keep in. What happened on the battlefield continued to replay in my head, only for me to cry harder. Solus didn't say a word, she only held onto me.
The doors slide open to having Ratchet, Jolt, and a few doctors run at full speed. "JAZZ, BEE MOVE!" The two moved out of the way as Ratchet and Jolt in his holoform along with a doctor and nurse checked to see how I was doing. "Avi. Avi, can you hear me?" I broke the hug with Solus to see Ratchet talking to me while checking my stats. Jolt rushes to my other side, Bee held Jazz back as I walk to Jolt's holoform.
"She woke up doc! I saw her wake up!" Jazz explained. Glancing at Ratchet's holoform. His whole appearance was disheveled, and the amount of bags under his eyes. He hasn't been sleeping lately. Turning to Jolt, he was the same. How long have I been here? I felt a hand placed on my shoulder.
"Avianna." I only put my hand on top of Jolt's to see if I can get a reaction from him. Unfortunately, my hand phased through him with no reaction. It was becoming too painful to watch them. "How long have I been here, Solus?" She sighs before saying, "Quite some time."
"The Fallen?" A moment of silence until she answers again, "He's gone. Optimus defeated him. The planet is safe, and you should rest, Avianna." I am tired, but I need the reality of things, especially what happened.
"What about Eva?" I turn to Solus, already knowing the answer.
"Avi..." I shook my head. I need her to say it because my mind isn't believing what's going on. I think I'm in denial and I don't wanna be. So please Solus, just rip the bandage off.
"Tell me." She said nothing. "Solus..." My voice broke with my eyes misted again.
"Please. Tell me." I begged her. She closed her eyes and within a second, the scenery changed. Clear blue skies with the sun shining bright. I scanned the place to realize she brought us to a cemetery. She only pointed to the tombstone in front of me. That's when it happened. Every part of me shattered in an instant. My legs gave out, and I fell to my knees. Words couldn't form, only cries. This pain... no words could describe it in my chest, only grew as I read the name on the stone. I have to accept it. I must accept it.
... I can't. Eva is dead! I can't bring her back. It's my fault. It's all my fault. Clenching the hospital gown where my heart is, my body fell to the side, hitting the ground before crouching into a fetal position. Solus said nothing as she patiently waited for me.
"I'm sorry Eva. I'm so sorry. I'm sorry." Seconds turned into minutes, minutes into hours. I stayed grieving. Once all the tears dried and the crying stopped unbothered by the excruciating headaches, I finally got the strength to get up. Footsteps approached me as I stare at the stone. Taking one last moment, I told her, "I'm ready." The scenery changed again in a blink of an eye. I was back in the med bay. It seems Jazz and Bee left and Ratchet was the one watching over me.
"When did the last time Ratchet sleep?"
"Not since they got you back from the Fallen. Because of the extra energy you received, it's been causing a strain on your spark. It keeps going out, then reviving again. It's kept him on edge. This drove him almost insane, always worried you would die as well. The one called Ironhide convinced him to take a break."
A small smile appeared on my face. "By convince, you mean by force, right?" She nods. The Autobots and humans alike took turns in watching you. If your spark was acting out, they would contact Ratchet, mainly his apprentice Jolt, or a human doctor, to revive you again. Before you awakened, he was resting.
"But now I got him like this. What can I do?"
"All those times your spark giving out was actually your body adjusting to the energy given to you. Since you released a sufficient amount, it should set you." An eyebrow raised at her statement. "What are you talking about?"
"The pain you felt at the cemetery you actually release extra energy that the Fallen has given you. Haven't you noticed you don't feel as sluggish as before?" Now that she mentioned it. I felt a bit more energetic. Speaking of the Fallen.
"What did the Fallen want, anyway? Why push the matrix's energy to me?" Solus slowly shook her head. "Answers will come later. It's best to rest until you get a new mission." Right when I was going to ask her one more question, she snapped her fingers and my eyes snapped open. I was back in my body. Looking to my right, poor Ratchet started falling asleep. Apparently, the sleep was winning him over.
Alright, Avi, you can do it. In three, two, one... the attempt to move failed. My arms were like bricks. I couldn't move them. Glancing over at the sleeping doctor, his head went back, and he woke up. Rubbing his eyes, they were wide the moment they landed on me.
He whispered, "Avi?" Immediately, he rushed to my side. "Avi don't move-" The moment he got closer, my eyes said everything. He stopped what he was about to do, held a hand in one hand, and gently pet my head with the other. My eyes picked up Solus still there. She waves her hand again, giving me the energy to lift my arms to cup his face.
He grips my hands as tears calmly stream down his face. "I-I thought I lost you, too. Thank the all spark. I would never forgive myself." A tear escaped my eye. I know Ratchet. Giving a smile through the mask, I could sense my arms were getting heavy again. Even he noticed. ratchet guided my arms down to my sides.
"It's okay Avi. I'll be here when you wake up. I'm not going anywhere." He placed a soft kiss on my forehead as my eyelids grew heavy, drifting me into slumber.
