hey guys uuuuhh sorry about the wait lol i got busy with school and then i had to rewrite this chapter like five times. like i wrote like six extra pages for this chapter that i had to scrap because it just wasn't meshing uuuggghhhh. i wanted to get this out before summer was out and that obviously didnt happen. i really wanna get a halloween chapter out but well see. ALSO GAM UPDATED LIKE THREE TIMES IN BETWEEN NOW AND MY LAST CHAPTER! omg can you believe whats going on UGH im so excited to see how this story wraps upppppp

anyway R&R please love ya!


Hawai'i sighed in contentment.

The sea crawled along the shore ahead of her, the warm summer breeze blew through her hair, and American sensibilities had finally allowed her to be the closest she's been to comfortable on the beach since the occupation. The bikini was a very new fad, and with the relaxation of decency rules on beaches, Ho'omana could finally let loose and enjoy her near daily trips to the seashore.

"Like this 'Mana?"

Hawai'i sat up from where she was sunbathing, Alfred was laying on one of the surfboards she'd lent him and began to run through the motions of pulling himself up to a standing position. She pulled her sunglasses down the bridge of her nose, "That's good, baby! But you really can only learn out there!"

Alfred glanced back at the water, before looking at her, "I know!" He huffed, "I'm not scared!"

"I didn't say you were." She sighed. Alfred had been avoiding going into the actual waves for about an hour now. Ho'omana pushed herself upright, "I just know that you'll get the hang of surfing quicker on the waves." She glanced down the beach, searching for a familiar hat, "But don't worry about that right now. Your brother seems to have forgotten about us and the food he said he was getting."

Alfred jogged over to her, stabbing the surfboard into the sand next to her beach towel and umbrella. She stood up all the way, stretching languidly and relishing in the heat of the sun beating down on her, "Alright," She said, looking around, "which way did he go?"

"Uh, he said he was gonna get us poké, so…left?" He said, gesturing in the direction of that new beach shack she'd heard about.

Hawai'i nodded and began walking that way. Usually, Alfred was the one who got distracted while getting food, which was why she sent Tex in the first place. That and she thought Alfred needed a moment to practice on his board without Texas heckling at his shoulder. Ho'omana was really proud of the progress both had made in the few days they had been coming to the beach, but she had to admit that Alfred's not-fear of the sea was holding him back. And with Texas begging her to let him test his luck during high tide, she could tell that he was getting frustrated with himself.

The sound of The Beach Boys drifted from the shack ahead of them, pulling her from her thoughts. Hawai'i rolled her eyes, as glad as she was that the band had inspired a surf craze in her boys (and the whole of the US), their music wasn't something she was particularly fond of. Her boys loved them, though, and if this was what it took for them to finally show some interest in her culture then so be it.

"There he is!" Alfred yelled, bolting inside the breezy building. Ho'omana let out a sigh, before speed-walking after him. Alfred was like a little kid sometimes, and his boundless energy was getting hard to keep up with. She wondered how Tex did it.

The inside of the beach shack was just as sandy as the outside, with a thatched overhanging roof and a tiki bar that took up most of the building's space. She walked around the side of the bar, following the sound of Alfred's voice, until she caught sight of Texas. Hawai'i opened her mouth to yell at him for making her and Al wander around the beach looking for him before she registered that Tex was talking to a couple of young girls, and Alfred was standing off to the side looking very put out.

Oh, she understood.

Texas was leaning against the bar, one arm propped up against his face and the other gesturing as he retold some outlandish tale. The girls, a pretty little blonde tourist and a long-haired Hawaiian local, were both enraptured and Ho'omana could see the little hearts spinning around their heads. Well, that explained why Alfred looked so upset, he always got this way when Texas acted more like a teenager and less like the little kid he was when it was just the two. Just then Texas leaned closer to the girls, tilting his head just so, and Hawai'i swore she could have almost sworn Spain had taken the place of her son. The girls both giggled at whatever he said, and Alfred rolled his eyes so hard Hawai'i was sure they would fall right out. Alright, she sighed, they'd all had their fun, but Ho'omana was owed some poké.

She smirked, this was gonna be fun.

Running up to Texas, winking at Alfred as she passed him, Hawai'i threw her arms around the boy. Tex squawked at the sudden weight, nearly knocking over one of his little friend's drinks. Before he could say anything, though, Hawai'i pulled his hat off his head, tossing it back at Al, and fussing over him in her most maternal voice, "Oh, Tex, we've been looking all over for you!" She squee'd, gripping his face and making a big show of checking him over, "You can't just disappear like that, you know how I worry."

Texas tried to pull away from her, "'Mana! What're you doing!?" He put his arm up to shove her off, "I ain't been gone that long!"

"Tex, who is this?" The little blonde asked, her eyes sparkling with amusement.

"She's–"

"I'm his mama!" Hawai'i cut him off, finally succeeding in pushing Tex's arm down enough to land a big wet kiss on his cheek.

Both the girls were now barely hiding their laughs, before the Hawaiian girl let out a snort, "Well, Lana, I think we should leave Tex to mommy dearest, huh?"

The tourist, Lana, let out a snicker herself, "Yeah, I think we should." She linked arms with the local, "See you later, Tex. Me and Naia will be at the luau down at the dancehall tonight, if your mama lets you go!" She said before both girls skipped off.

The second they were out of sight, Hawai'i let go of Tex, who immediately slammed his head down on the table. Alfred gently set his hat back on his head, before dancing back out of grabbing range. Texas let out a loud groan, before shoving himself away from the bar counter, "Why." He asked, gesturing to where the two girls had been.

"Don't mess with my poké."

Texas grumbled, before pulling out his wallet and slamming a few bills down on the counter and went to order for them. Alfred moved to sit beside her while they waited, Texas was refusing to be near them for the moment, but Hawai'i was sure that the moment the food was served he would forget all about Lana and Naia.

Al leaned against the counter, his former mirth giving way to a melancholy that Ho'omana wasn't used to seeing on him, "He's still doll dizzy." Alfred whispered.

Hawai'i sighed, this again, "Well, Texas does have some Latin in him, and you and I both know what those Latin types are like." She put a hand on Al's shoulder, "But don't worry, he's just a teenager! I'm sure you'll understand soon."

Alfred made a face, "Blech, I'll never understand."

Ho'omana stifled a laugh at that. He was such a kid sometimes!

Eventually the food was served, and Texas yelled at them to hurry up or he was going to eat it all himself. They made their way back to their spot, Hawai'i on her beach blanket and the boys sitting on the warm sand. They ate in silence for a minute, before Alfred turned on the little radio he'd brought and what else but The Beach Boys played. Her own boys started singing along, terribly she might add, before they finished up their food and ran back into the water, ignoring her sage advice about cramping.

Well, if they wanted to drown, she could tell them 'I told you so' when they woke up.

Ho'omana layed back down, pulling out a magazine she'd stolen from the doctor's office, listening to the boys splash around. After another hour of swimming, Al and Tex made their way back to her exhausted. Texas flopped on his back next to her, his arms above his head, and sopping wet, while Alfred pulled out the colorful sand shovel and bucket she'd bought before they'd flown over. With Texas' breaths slowly evening out and Alfred distracted by whatever masterpiece he was working on, Hawai'i allowed herself to take in the scene.

With her boys next to her, quiet and full and acting like humans again, Ho'omana almost felt like crying. She was content, or as content as she could be these days. She had her little family with her, the one she'd been allowed to enter and maintain a spot in for forty years now, and even if her heart ached at the thought of the rest of her family, Hawai'i knew that if her family stayed this small for the rest of time she would still be happy.

Time seemed to stretch on before them, slow and sticky and sweet, before Texas suddenly jumped up from where he was sprawled out in the sun, rolling over and snatching up his abandoned wristwatch. He pushed his somehow still wet hair out of his eyes, before his eyes bulged out of his head, "SHIT! Al, we gotta go now." He yelled out as he scrambled to stand, almost losing his balance as he struggled to pick up his discarded hat and clothes all at once.

Ho'omana looked up from her magazine, "Where are you two going in such a hurry? The waves just started calming down enough for you nā mea ahakiahaki to surf again."

Al looked up from the sand sculpture he was making (because it was never just a castle), "Yeah dude, we just–" He dodged out of the way of one of Tex's hands, "–got here."

"Al, it's like twenty to noon!"

Alfred squinted his eyes, absently letting Texas drag him to his feet, before he got that look on his face like he left a pie on the windowsill overnight, "Oh my god." He whispered, before running to the pile he'd left his clothes in. "We are gonna be so late!" He yelled as he shoved his legs through his capri pants.

Texas looked up from buttoning his rumpled Aloha shirt, "I know! And we look like a couple a beach bums! The higher ups are gonna kill us!" He gestured to his thigh huggers and the flip flops Alfred was shoving on. He let out another yell of frustration before turning to Hawai'i, "Mana, you gotta gimme your car keys!"

Hawai'i sat up all the way, "Oh no! You, sir, are not driving my Corvette anywhere without me supervising!" She said, making sure to grip her keys tight, "Besides, even if I had a junker, you two are more likely to drive yourselves off a cliff right now than make it in time to whatever meeting you forgot." Ho'omana smirked as she slipped on her cover-up, "I'll drive!"

She bent to pick up their blanket, and out of the corner of her eye could see Texas pull at his hair before letting out such a huge sigh, Ho'mana wondered if she should be offended. "Oh don't be so dramatic! I'll explain to your bosses that I'm the one that held you two up." After she instructed the boys to load up the car, she looked back at the waves one last time and the perfect spot she's secured, before setting her new sunglasses on the bridge of her nose and stalking off towards her car.

When she got to the side of the road Alfred was already looking over some half-way damp papers he must have grabbed that morning, and Texas looked like he was about to have a hernia if she walked any slower. Ah, she remembered being young and thinking old people were just about the slowest creatures on earth, especially if she were already late for something. They're not, of course, but sometimes she walked like the elder she planned on being, if only to watch her boys squirm with barely concealed annoyance. "

When she finally reached the car, sliding into the only slightly worn driver's seat, with Tex riding shotgun and Alfred shedding sand all over her backseat, she asked, "Alright, where we going boys?" She took off towards the city, and when a few too many seconds passed with no response, she chanced a glance at Tex who was halfway out of his seat trying to talk to Al without her hearing. Ho'omana rolled her eyes, "Uh, hello? I asked you two a question. Now tell me where we're going or I'm driving us back to my place. And sit forward, Tex! You're gonna get us pulled over." She slapped the back of her hand against his billowing shirt.

Texas let out an angry sigh, one that Hawai'i recognized from her own adolescence, before making a big show of turning around and sinking into his seat. He crushed a manilla folder against his chest, before huffing out, "We're going to the Federal Building in the city; s'a meeting with one of the unincorporated territories, they got a new constitution and the rep wanted to talk about it."

"Western half's gonna be there." Alfred muttered from the back, frantically scribbling down notes in a small leatherbound book.

Texas sat up at that, "Are you serious? Western Samoa just gained independence! You don't think they're tryna reunify right?" He pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose and began to frantically look through his own debriefing; going back and forth with Alfred over the likelihood of reunification and what that would mean to Eastern Samoa's status as an American territory, though at this point they were more Nation than human.

Usually this type of behavior, the way her sweet boys turned back into the monsters that backed an illegal coup against her royal family and forcibly added her to their growing echelon of conquered land, turned her stomach. Usually a bitter wave of old anger and resentment, the last dredges of Nāwei reminding her that even though she loved her boys, she did not love their empire. This time though, the sound of her blood rushing through her veins and the pounding of her heart in her eyes drowned it out.

Drowned.

And wasn't that accurate? Hi'ilani had drowned and from the ashes of that life, that name, rose Hawai'i as she was today. Kahikilani and all the names after defined her and her independence from childhood and from the overbearing eyes of her family. Hawai'i had been a series of warring islands, a united kingdom, and an American state, had lived through not one but three different brushes with direct colonization and continued to practice her traditions as best she could all without the input or security of her father. And that was a good thing! Samoa would have taken her away from the fighting, shielded her from the pain and death that ravaged her people over the hundreds of years it took for Hawai'i to go from Kahikilani to Ho'omana, and that would have severed their connection, would have destroyed the pride her people have in her and her ways. It would have kept her from growing past the little girl he would have always seen her as, would have kept her stagnant and with a single name defining her.

The sound of a horn screeching behind them tore Ho'omana from her thoughts. Ah, she was on the four-way right before the main road heading towards the civic district. She hit the gas harder than she should have, if only to save the driver behind her from the stink-eye Alfred was no doubt giving her. Or the rude gesture Texas was currently holding up.

Maybe she should have gotten a car with a hood.

Either way, before she knew it, and definitely before she was ready, the car had been parked and the boys were ushering her inside. The building was fairly empty, the oversized ceiling fans circled lazily above her while Alfred flashed an ID at the young woman sitting at the front desk. The secretary pointed to her right, with a big smile on her face, and Hawai'i could see her lips moving, but for the life of her was unable to make out a single coherent sound. Texas nodded at the woman vigorously, almost rudely as if he were trying to get her to stop talking, before grabbing her hand and pulling her into the elevator where Alfred was waiting. As soon as she was clear of the sliding doors, Texas began repeatedly and impatiently pushing the close door button and then one for the twelfth-floor.

Once the elevator started in ascent, Alfred, who was leaning against the corner farthest from the doors, turned to her, "Hey, Mana, you feeling alright? You've been awfully quiet since we got into the city." He said, his piercing blue eyes staring straight into her.

Texas looked up from where he was trying and failing to make his beachwear look professional, "Yeah, usually we gotta pull you from a conversation with the locals. What gives?"

Ho'omana let out a sigh, leaning against the cold metal wall of the elevator, "I'm just overwhelmed, boys." She said, feeling younger than she had in centuries, "I haven't seen Samoa in a millennium." She rubbed at her eyes, slamming down the urge to tear up, "I don't how he's going to react to…all this." She gestured down to herself, her woman's body and her woman's soul.

"A millennium…" Alfred whispered, and she didn't have to look up to know both of her boys, so young in the grand scheme of things, were both looking at her with wide, guileless eyes.

"So what ya ain't seen 'im in a thousand years! If he can't handle you at your beach babe then he can't have ya at your G.I Jane!" Texas said, an air of defiant finality in his voice.

Ho'omana huffed out a little laugh at that. Once, after her and Tex's victory in the Pacific Theater, Hawai'i had drunkenly confessed almost all of her past relationships with other Nations to one of her sisters in arms, detailing the highs and lows of every romance, and bemoaning the fact that all the Nations her age were either halfway across of the world or related to her. At the time it seemed like a perfectly normal slip; their government even had a protocol for mortals who find out about them through bar-hopping. Little did Hawai'i know that that particular woman, a good soldier and dear friend, was never one to hide a juicy bit of gossip from her little sister. Nor was she aware that on a visit to Lānaʻi, about five years later (and right under Hawai'i's nose), Texas would meet said little sister.

All this to say, that Texas knew way more about her dating history than she had ever planned.

"No, baby." She said, looking up at the ceiling, and wondered if this was some type of karma for pestering the boys about their fathers, "Samoa and I are–family." The boys' faces dropped, their eyes darting in each other's direction.

Alfred smacked his lips together, blinking rapidly, "You mean…" He pointed towards the door that was bound to open any second. Texas furiously shuffled his papers around, no doubt looking for whatever grainy photo they had taken of the Samoa's so he could make sure she wasn't pulling their legs.

She stood up all the way, crossing her arms and finally meeting the boys' eyes, "Yes. Samoa, whichever was the original state, is my father."

"Who you ain't seen…"

"In a thousand years. Yes. And now that we're all caught up, I hope you're ready for whatever's about to happen." Around them, the elevator let out its final ding, Ho'omana moved to the front of the pack, standing between like the omen of death that was, and plastered on the most genuine smile she could.

Once the door slid open, she was greeted by empty air and Hawai'i had the briefest moment of hope that maybe everyone involved in the meeting had fallen ill or were taken by the huakai po. Then, of course, a crowd of men in slate gray suits came barreling towards them, surrounding her and her boys before ushering them as quickly as possible towards the biggest conference room in the building. She could hear the boys frantic excuses, and what was obviously a former field general hiss out some understandable death threats about professionalism to them, before someone pulled open the double doors and the crowd dispersed around them.

Abruptly, Hawai'i felt naked. More naked than she had ever felt before, and she had never been ashamed of her body in its natural state the way her boys were. This time, though, she understood their mortification every time she barged into their shared bathroom, telling them that she just couldn't hold it and had gotten too used to indoor plumbing to ever go back unless absolutely necessary. Without the array of suited men in front of her, she was forced to watch as her father and his other half, and that was a terrifying thought, that her father had been split into East and West, turned towards them. Had to watch as the anger in their eyes, anger from being ignored and from being colonized, gave way to utter shock as they both locked on to her figure.

She met her father's eyes. He was older now, just as she was. But he was old in the way of the elders, unlike Hawai'i who had simply grown up. His hair was speckled with shocks of silvery gray, and his skin, once so incredibly rich in tone, was a dull brown. He had more frown lines and stress marks on his face than she would have ever felt possible as a child. When he was young (and weren't creatures like them always young?), he had had the beginnings of crows feet, and the normal lines of a life well lived in the sun and with family, but these new lines were carved into his face with pain rather than with love. He seemed smaller now too, though he was still the biggest man in the room by at least half a foot, and Hawai'i wanted to cry because of it.

Is this what she looked like to him? Sallow, and sad, and defeated?

Ho'omana took a shaky breath, unable to look away from the man in front of her, "Aloha, tamā."

Samoa's eyes widened, and tears gathered in his eyes, "Hi'ilani?"

Hawai'i found herself nodding, even as she opened her mouth to correct him. Before she could get a word out though, she was being swept up in the type of hug she hadn't known she'd set sail a lifetime ago. With her father's arms around her, with him whispering ancient words in her ears, ones she hadn't heard in over a thousand years, Hawai'i felt the part of herself Kahikilani had hardened crack and then all at once it broke. All the unmanageable sadness of being alone, the anger at her family for never once coming to look for her, and the bitter lies she told herself about not deigning them worthy of her or her forgiveness should they ever wash up on her shore gave way in that moment.

The last dredges of Hi'ilani surged forward, and Hawai'i wept.

Later, when her and her father's hysterics had calmed, Ho'omana finally pulled away. Her father's big hand came up to pet her hair, before sliding down to brush away the final tear that had slid down her cheek. He let out a watery breath, an elated smile filling up his face, "Hi'lani, my daughter." Samoa said with such emotion Hawai'i's heart throbbed with the pain of it all, "You have been returned to me."

"Tamā." She said, moving to stand again, seeing as they had slid to their knees sometime between now and then, "It's good to see you again." Ho'omana held out a hand to him, pulling him to stand. He still towered over her, but the height difference between them seemed smaller, even if it probably hadn't changed much at all.

Aukai frowned at that, "'It's good to see you'? Hi'ilani, you have been gone from us for a millennium. We thought you had died!" He stepped closer to her, his arms out, "Don't you have anything to say? An explanation?"

Samoa's eyes were big and pleading, and though his voice was harsh, Ho'omana knew better than to mistake anguish for anger. Still, the hunch of his shoulders and the furrow in his brow sparked something in her chest, reigniting that age-old anger she had locked away in herself centuries ago, "Me?" She said, stepping entirely away from her father, the distance giving her strength and fortifying her own fury, "You want to know why I stayed away?"

Aukai's eyes widened incredulously at her, looking just like he did whenever she would beg him to treat her like a burgeoning adult and not the little girl he was adamant she still was, "Yes! You faked your own death! Stayed away from us for hundreds of years and let us mourn you for what? Your own pride!?"

"Pride?" Hawai'i whispered, her face twisting into a sneer, "You think I would isolate myself for a thousand years, live through all the brutality that I have alone, just to spite you?"

Samoa's face dropped, "Hi'ilani, no I–"

"My name," Hawai'i shouted, loud enough that it must have alerted the crowd lingering outside the double doors, "is Ho'omana!" Her father flinched backwards at that, and Hawai'i felt a brief sense of satisfaction seeing him aware of her as another Nation and not as his child, "And you have no right to question me about my isolation when you're the ones who never came!"

Tears were falling down her cheeks now, the phantom sensation of her father's arms around her, so warm just minutes ago, now chilled her to the bone. An old grief rose up inside her, dampening her rage and all at once the betrayal of a little girl whose family never came looking for her replaced it. Hawai'i felt Kahikilani's misery begin to overwhelm her, washing out any sense of relief and hope that she would be welcomed back with open arms.

A sob was working its way up her throat, growing stronger and stronger the more she allowed herself to remember her life as Kahikilani and all the girls after her. Just as it was about to break free and cement Hawai'i as a little girl who couldn't control her emotions, the doors slammed open behind her. Ho'omana spun around, her hand shooting to where a gun would have been holstered a decade and half ago, and caught sight of Alfred and Texas.

The boys gasped at the sight of her, and Ho'omana nearly started crying again, if only out of embarrassment this time. Alfred ran towards her, setting his big hands on her shoulders and whispering out frantic questions. His ocean blue eyes stared deeply into hers, his mouth set in the beginnings of a deep frown, and Ho'omana knew she had to calm down if she wanted to avoid an international incident. She quickly wiped her tears away, taking a shaky breath, before forcibly shoving Alfred away from her (and her father). "I'm okay, baby." She whispered to him, before turning back to Samoa.

Texas was standing in between her and her father, one hand out and the other very pointedly aimed backwards to where she knew he was hiding a switchblade in his boot. Ho'omana let out a huff, Tex had been so violent as of late, immediately jumping to the nuclear options during any type of conflict. It was as unusual as it was upsetting, but she knew this newfound brutality was just a way to match Alfred's intense paranoia caused by the Cold War.

Hawai'i gently set a hand on Tex's shoulder, but he brushed it off, not taking his eyes off of Samoa, "No, 'Mana, I got this." He said harshly, "If this asshole wants to start a fight, me an' Al'll give him a fight!"

Ho'omana nearly yanked him into her arms at that. Aukai was a big man with many, many more years of experience than even Tex's father, and if her son challenged him to a fight she knew the outcome would be disastrous for both Nations. The last time Tex had died in front of Alfred, he'd started a war, and who knew what he would do to an already colonized island nation? She pulled him backwards, making sure that she kept eye contact with him, "Baby? No, we don't need to fight everybody who upsets us, and especially not a newly independent Nation." Texas stared at her for a moment, before letting out an angry huff of air and going to stand moodily in the corner near Alfred.

Hawai'i then turned to her father, making sure to stand as she had when England had walked down that gangplank, "I admit that when I left you all it was because of my own pride. I was a self important child who didn't listen to her elders' decisions. But I didn't stay away because of some grudge or whatever you all seem to think of me; I couldn't remember any of you, let alone a way back." Her heart thumped at admitting that, telling another Nation just how vulnerable she is to have lost decades of memories that are still foggy and half-remembered, "What about you, huh? You knew the way to me, and yet you never came. I waited for you. Every boat, every fishing trip, every thump of movement outside my home, but you never bothered to find me."

Aukai's face shattered, the lines on his face deepening in his sorrow, "Hi'i–Ho'omana…we thought you had been replaced. I–I couldn't bear the idea of meeting Hawai'i's new representative, of letting them slip into my memories of you or to steal your true name." Samoa took a deep breath, blinking away a sheen of tears, "I didn't know, baby. I would've come running if I knew you were there, but when your voyagers came ashore and spoke of a young woman with a different name, one who was stoic and aloof, I thought you had split and then perished at her hand." Her father let out a miserable laugh, "I hated her, cursed her name and vowed to never give her the chance at being a part of our family." He looked into her eyes, a sad smile on his face, "And yet, here you are. I don't know how I'll ever make it up to you."

Hawai'i let out a sigh. She had been afraid of that answer, of knowing it wasn't a punishment from the gods or her father that kept her alone, but their humanity. It made sense, and Ho'omana knew that if she had thought one of her boys dead and replaced by a new representation, she would never allow herself to meet them. She would carry and visceral hatred for that new Nation, would carry her grief with her in every waking moment, and it would cloud her judgment and keep her away when she should have reached out. "You know," She said quietly, "I can think of one way, tamā." Hawai'i glanced back at the boys, at Alfred who was watching with wide, hopeful eyes, and at Tex who was glaring out the window, scuffing his boot against the floor, "Why don't we show my boys what a real surf competition looks like?"