Surprise! There's a chapter after all!
I actually ended up being able to transfer some of the documents off of my hard-drive and onto a family members computer, so I could edit the chapters I had written and still release them.
Anyways, Cinderella will also release on Thursday, so look forward to that if you read that as well. My computer was, in fact, broken beyond repair, so I got a new one, but until I can get my writing app on that one, there won't be any new chapters being written.
That theoretically shouldn't be a problem, but eh, more annoying things have happened with less.
Without further ado...
Chapter 16
Alright, Mercury would admit it.
Domremy cleaned up pretty well.
The day of the winter festival was upon them, and the city had practically transformed itself overnight. The great big boreal trees that lined the dirt roads they treaded upon were all decorated with lights of different colors. Another thing he was pretty sure was called garland adorned the bristling branches as well, and they all smelled of an almost nostalgic cinnamon smell, which was weird, since he was fairly certain he didn't have any childhood memories of cinnamon.
Along the road as well were stalls set up in various places, lined with merchants selling little trinkets, like round, glass ornaments meant to hang up on the trees, but also other round objects, these ones with little scenes and vignettes inside of them.
"They're called snow globes!" One of the Arc sisters…Laguna he was pretty sure, called out to him. "They're supposed to be like little towns and stuff. And then you shake them up, and the dust inside makes it look like it's snowing!"
Mercury tilted his head. "Why would you buy one?"
Laguna shrugged in response. "I don't know. The same reason you buy a statue of a character from your favorite show or something. Because it looks neat, and you like it."
When Mercury thought about it, he couldn't find much fault in that.
Now, to clear up any misconceptions, Mercury was not at all claiming that he was glad he'd come or anything. No, the doubts creeping about his mind had yet to abate, but it was… nice to look at, he supposed. The bright lights, the jovial atmosphere. It was all…
"You alright?"
Mercury turned to see Blake walking alongside him, dressed up in some kind of Mistrali dress that he didn't know the name of. Yu–something.
"Huh. You're not, like, cold?"
"I'm wearing a second one of these underneath this one."
"Ah."
"Now answer my question. Are you alright?"
He found he didn't much want to answer that question, and so he searched far and wide for a distraction of some sort. Luckily, he didn't have to look very far.
"What's that?"
"What, you've never played a carnival game before?" Blake questioned, arcing an eyebrow. "Seriously?"
"Forgive me for not having had a childhood."
"Mercury, I was already a terrorist when I was eight, and even I've played a carnival game."
"…Touché."
"Here," Blake said as she gestured for him to follow, and for some reason, he did.
She brought him up to the front of the stand, where a portly looking man with a beard smiled at the two of them, probably guessing that they were out on a date or something, and not that he was a killer and a future terrorist being dragged along by a killer and a former terrorist.
To be fair, that would be hard to guess.
Set up in front of them was what looked to be some kind of bb-gun. A rifle, to be exact. And a way's away from that was a stack of cans.
"The goal is to shoot down the stack of cans. Do it within a few shots, and you win a prize." Blake explained, before looking up at the portly man. "How much to play?"
"Hah, for the young couple's first go? We'll say free!"
Blake's eye twitched, before she let out a sigh and turned back around to Mercury, arching an eyebrow.
"Do you hear that, boyfriend, our first try's free."
"I don't see how this could possibly be my fault." He felt the need to chime in.
"I wasn't blaming you."
"You certainly seemed to be."
"Just take the gun."
He did as commanded.
It turned out that shooting a stack of cans with a wimpy little fake gun was actually difficult. This was bad for a number of reasons.
For one, Mercury almost immediately got annoyed. He swore under his breath, took his stance, and fired again.
He missed.
Secondly, when Mercury got angry from losing at something, he became an awfully competitive person. In fact, the moment the man at the counter announced he'd run out of pellets, he immediately slammed down thirty lien on the table.
"How many attempts does that buy me?"
"Six, my boy."
"Hrmph." He growled out in response, before picking up the next gun in line, and readying his aim as the man readjusted the cans.
Thirdly, Mercury didn't perform very well when he was upset, which in turn only made him more upset. This was a vicious cycle. In the Supreme Smash Sisters world, this was referred to as 'tilting'.
Mercury was a dirty, filthy tilter.
Fourthly, Mercury didn't have very much money to be wasting on some stupid carnival game. He'd not actually brought all that much to Domremy, on account of thinking that bringing several thousand lien with him might come off as suspicious given his only known occupation was 'school student'.
School students generally lost money; they tended not to earn much.
And fifthly, Blake seemed to find this sequence of events entirely hilarious.
"Would you stop snickering!?" Mercury hissed under his breath as he missed the cans for what must've been the fiftieth time. "It is not helping!"
Blake only proceeded to disguise her laughter poorer, cracking under her breath as she pretended to read the book she held aloft in her hand.
She was fooling no one.
It also annoyed the absolute shit out of him, so there was that.
"Oh, fuck this," He shouted after his shot went wide to the left for the eighty thousandth time. "This game is rigged!"
The portly old man behind the counter didn't seem to protest Mercury's assessment, but then again, that was likely because he was too busy counting the stack of what was easily two hundred lien that Mercury had put down over the course of the last half hour.
"Come again!"
Mercury flipped the man off as he stomped away, quickly followed by a still snickering Belladonna.
"Well," The woman said with a quiet giggle. "You were uhm…"
"Bad, I know."
"That's one way of putting it."
"Oh, go fuck yourself."
Blake just snorted.
/
"Hey, hey, Mercury!"
"What?" He asked as Laguna, Beige, and one of the older Arc sisters came up to him.
"Come get a photo with us!"
"…Why?"
"N-No reason!" Laguna – he was pretty sure it was Laguna – said with a blushing red face. "Just, y'know, for fun!"
"Oh," The older sister commented with a knowing smirk. "For fun, hm?"
"Sh-Shut up!" Laguna yelled back at the woman.
Mercury didn't really know what was going on here. Oh, he knew the girl was lying to him, but other than that… well, he supposed it couldn't hurt.
"Sure, I guess."
"YEAH!" Laguna shouted, before clearing her throat and bowing awkwardly. "S-Sorry about that, uhm, come with me, okay!?"
And in the next moment, he was being dragged along, practically kicking and screaming, off to who knew where.
/
"Thank you for earlier."
Mercury turned to see that same older Arc sister from when Laguna had accosted him walking over, sitting down on the bench he'd chosen to occupy right beside him.
"Thank me?" He raised an eyebrow. "Why?"
"For humoring Laguna." She said. "You made her night I do believe. I don't know if you've noticed, or, well, with anyone else I'd say they'd have had to notice on account of how obvious she's being, but with you, I get the feeling you might've not–"
"Say what you're going to say, please."
"She has a crush on you." The older sister said with a smile.
Mercury let out a breath of laughter. "Yeah, well… shitty idea on her part."
"Oh, don't worry. I think it's more hero worship than anything. She doesn't actually want to date you, just thinks you're attractive and cool. She's fifteen. She's allowed to have her 'bad boy' phase."
Mercury snorted. "I guess that's fair."
"Still, again, thank you," The woman said, before dusting herself off and making to stand. "I can tell this doesn't come entirely easy to you. Putting in the effort as you are, regardless, means a lot."
"…Yeah. I uh… Yeah."
The woman just smiled.
"Well, have a nice night, Mercury."
"You too, uh…"
"Marigold." The woman said, before winking and moving off.
/
"C'mon, c'mon!"
Nora was dragging them all to and from, across the entirety of Domremy, and Mercury really still hadn't managed to figure out why.
"Nora," Ren, apparently done with being out of the loop, piped up. "What exactly are we walking all this way for?"
"What? I'll tell you what," Nora said, turning and looking at the four of them – that was a curious Jaune, a tired-looking Ren, a largely enigmatic Blake, and himself. "I managed to convince one of the barkeeps that I was of age! They're selling me eggnog!"
Mercury was suddenly intrigued.
Judging by the horrid sigh that came from off to his right, Ren was rather pointedly not.
/
Mercury was surprised to find that the night passed as quickly as it did.
Lo and behold, at the end of the nearly four hours they'd spent among the other festival goers of Domremy – an event that had proven to be far more popular than Mercury had expected, drawing quite the crowd from villages and towns nearby – he was almost shocked to admit that it hadn't been terrible.
No, if anything, it'd been almost…
Huh. That was weird. There was this… warm feeling in his gut.
He wasn't quite used to that.
Still, as the others all began to announce they were calling it a night, they each came up to him one by one to give their well-wishes.
"Hey, I hope you had a good time!" Jaune Arc laughed out at roughly eleven thirty. "Sorry to bail on you guys so early, but my younger sisters are getting kinda' beat. I'm gonna' take them back. You guys keep having fun, though!"
It took another hour for Nora and Ren to drop, but drop they did.
"But Renniiiiieee," Nora complained, slouched over the boy's shoulder. "Just a little mooooore…?"
"You've had more than enough eggnog for the night, Nora." Ren sighed. "I can't believe you managed to convince that man you were an adult…"
"What can I say?" Nora giggled, clearly too loopy to walk of her own faculties. "I'm a people person."
"Yes, that you are," Ren said, shaking his head, before turning back to the rest of them. "I'm going to go and take her to bed. You all have a good night."
"Ooo, takin' me to bed, are ya', Rennie?" Nora slurred out, probably trying for a saucy wink, and ending up blinking her eyelids like some form of reptile. "I hope that means what I think it means."
"It means I'm placing you in your bed, and then going to sleep in my own."
"Aw."
Jaune's older sisters checked out next. The young couple whose names he'd forgotten, and their baby named Adrian – he wasn't sure why he remembered the babies name, but for some reason he did – had apparently had their parents watch the little tyke for the night and were now giving each other bedroom eyes so obviously that every single one of the others just groaned.
"Get a room, you two." Marigold spoke with a sigh. "Preferably not one near mine."
And then, finally, it was Blake who threw in the towel.
"Alright, I'm going back." Blake said at roughly one in the morning, yawning into her hand. "I'm already planning a few sleepless nights in my future; I can't afford one now."
He grunted something out in response that was mostly a waste of his air, but eh, the girl nodded back, so he supposed it had served a function.
And then he was alone.
Well, he said alone. He meant without another member of his little 'group'. There were still quite a few adults out perusing the stands, though mostly, at this point, it was only drunks trying for late night hookups and couples who had rather clearly already decided they were hooking up.
Mercury wandered one of the lesser-walked trails as he tried to process all of the… everything that was currently running through him.
All of this was just…
It clashed so readily with the conclusion he'd come to the previous evening. That he was a killer. That he'd already had his life decided for him. That Blake's talk of second chances was that of someone who knew nothing – someone who'd fallen for a whispered word of redemption and clung to it so desperately.
But how could he say that with the way he looked at the lights hanging above him?
For when his eyes tracked to the trails of wire, upon which hung tiny little bulbs of light, his vision danced. He'd never seen anything quite so… bright before. Never in all his life. It shouldn't have meant much, really. It was a tiny little thing in all honesty.
But to him, to someone who'd never known any of this as normal, who'd never gone out with friends, who'd never talked with someone about what he felt, who'd never played a game at a carnival, who'd never honestly had a night to just have f–
…Oh.
Oh. So that was what this was, then?
Mercury found himself reaching down to his heart, to the organ beating, beating, beating inside of his chest. And he held his hand over it and felt as it beat.
True enough, it beat.
Unlike his legs, long lost, rotted away, replaced with metal, and made unfeeling…
Perhaps it could still…
"Hey, kid, you alright?"
Mercury was snapped out of his reverie by the sound of a voice he didn't recognize, and he turned back to see an older gentleman peering at him from a few feet back.
"Huh?"
"Well, you didn't seem to hear me." The man clarified. "I was sayin' that they're closin' down the festival now, startin' to take down the lights and decorations. You might wanna' head home, it's bound to get mighty dark out here soon."
Mercury nodded to show he was at least listening to the man, even if it was only kind of.
Because for them to be closing down… how long had he been standing here, alone with his thoughts?
He shook such feelings away as he heard the man who'd come up to him turning and walking away, and in that moment an odd sort of urge hit Mercury, and he found himself turning as well, clearing his throat.
"Hm? Didya' need somethin', lad?"
"…Would you guys need any help with that?" He muttered. "Cleanin' up, I mean."
"Hm?" The man seemed surprised, but that expression quickly gave way to a grin. "Well, I doubt they'd say no to an extra pair of hands, if you're offerin'!"
"…Yeah. Sure."
"Alright, c'mon, I'll introduce you to Dean, see if he can't get any work for ya'!"
And so, Mercury followed behind the man at a medium gait, stepping along the coarse gravel path.
And then something tickled his forehead.
He looked up, as did the man in front of them, and saw just what it was.
"Well, I'll be." The man said, laughing to himself. "Snow on the day of the winter festival. They say that's good luck, y'know."
Mercury hummed something in answer that, just like with Blake earlier, wasn't really anything at all. And just like before, it seemed to assuage the man.
"Hah, well then, we'd best hurry. Don't want to get covered!"
The man scurried off, and though Mercury followed, he did so more… sedately.
He was too busy just…
What could he even call it?
Just… experiencing.
Watching the snow as it hit the tall trees – evergreens, someone had told him – watching as it hit the ground, slowly beginning to build up higher and higher. Feeling as it touched his outfit, forming little splotches of water on his clothes. How the lights hanging off the wires made the snowfall dance with color.
It was just…
"Comin', lad?"
"Yeah!" He called back, shaking his head.
Honestly, the part of him that'd decided to do this was a small, tiny bit of him. It wasn't much of his being, his… self. But even so, he'd felt like he needed to do this. Needed to put something into this.
Because nothing had ever made him feel this way before. So… just the once…
Perhaps he'd give something back.
Given he was set to burn it all down one day…
It felt only fair.
/
Emerald didn't really have a plan as she marched her way towards Glynda Goodwitch's office.
She acknowledged that she should've had a plan. It would've been far smarter for her to have gone to the woman with something to actually say, instead of simply waffling aimlessly in front of her. And yet, Emerald was as she was. That wasn't going to be changing anytime soon.
So, she went without a plan.
She knocked thrice upon the door that led to her salvation – or her doom, really, it depended on the day – and received a call from inside to wait just a moment. Emerald did as asked, standing back a step and idly tapping her heel on the tile beneath her.
It made a staccato click, click, click.
When the door finally swung open, it was to see an odd look upon Ms. Goodwitch's face. One that was halfway caught between disappointment and relief. Halfway between reluctance and gratitude.
Emerald didn't really know what to make of that look, so she said nothing.
"Ms. Sustrai," Ms. Goodwitch said after a moment, shaking her head. "It's good to see you. Would you like to come inside?"
"If you're not busy, ma'am."
"Hah, no." Ms. Goodwitch shook her head with a mirthful sigh, even as she turned around and beckoned for Emerald to follow. "I almost wish I was, that I might get my mind off of some of the… admittedly idiotic things running about my brain at the moment. Believe me when I say your arrival is appreciated. I could use the reprieve from my own head."
"I've uh… definitely been there." Emerald said a bit lamely, rubbing the back of her neck as she meandered aimlessly in the entry hall.
Ms. Goodwitch caught onto that in another moment, shaking her head and gesturing for Emerald to sit down on the couch, where she had slept a night when she and Cinder had briefly quarreled. Emerald nodded her head, and stepped over to it, sinking down into the plush material with an audible crinkling of material.
"So," Ms. Goodwitch spoke as she maneuvered her way into the kitchen. "Would you like some tea? Or perhaps a water?"
Emerald felt her face burn red for just a moment in utter shame, before her stomach managed to win the rest of her over, and she asked quietly, "Do you have any more ice cream?"
Far from be put off, Ms. Goodwitch just smiled knowingly, in that elegant way she always seemed to, as she fished what seemed to be a fresh carton out of the freezer.
"I do."
"Then, uh… that please."
"How many scoops?"
"Is five too many?"
"For your daily sugar intake? Yes."
Emerald pouted smally.
"…But I'm a teacher, and not a nutritionist, so I suppose I'll allow it."
A tiny smile replaced her earlier pout, even as she shook her head.
Some part of Emerald raged inside of her, trying to warn the rest that this woman, too, was like everyone else she'd ever met. She didn't care.
Just trying to use her. They all were. Emerald was only ever a means to an end.
Of course, those thoughts were all but erased as a yellow plastic bowl was placed down in front of her. This time, the ice cream was an odd green color, with little black flakes inside of it. Emerald peered at it skeptically, because it most certainly wasn't the vanilla she'd partaken of last time.
"It's chocolate mint." Ms. Goodwitch said, spooning a dollop of the very same kind into her own lips, and smiling over at her. "Try it. I've always been a fan, myself."
Emerald had never really been too keen on trying things before. Well, that hadn't always been true. When she was younger, on the streets, she hadn't been able to afford being a picky eater. Now that she'd been taken off of them, though…
She liked what she liked. She knew what it was like to have no choice. To be hungry.
She had escaped that.
And so, because of that, she was not the type to go much out of her way to try things. Not when she already had all that she truly wanted.
But still… this was ice cream, wasn't it?
She idly broke off a tiny piece from one of the scoops, before pulling the metal utensil to her lips.
Her eyes lit up soon after.
"It's good!"
"I'm glad." Ms. Goodwitch said, covering her mouth as she gave an elegant chuckle. She was always annoyingly elegant. "Then how about we talk as we eat, hm? You can tell me why you came by."
Emerald went to nod, and really came quite close to nodding, aside from the fact that she stopped halfway through to cringe as she remembered just why she was here, which caused an odd sort of chain reaction that led to her letting out what was akin to a wretch.
It didn't make a lot of sense to her, and it must've made less to Ms. Goodwitch.
"Are you alright?"
"Oh, uh… fine!" She stressed, rather clearly lying, but then again, perhaps the woman was kind enough not to call her on it. "Y'know, just… fine."
Ms. Goodwitch nodded her head.
She was not fooled, Emerald could tell.
"Well… was it something related to your team?"
"No!" Emerald rushed to assure her for some reason. "No, we've been getting along well. Or, well, Cinder and I have been. N-Mint's" Shit that had been close, "out in Vale with relatives over break, and Mercury went with JNPR to visit Arc's hometown."
"Oh, I hadn't heard about Mercury taking a trip," Glynda said, smiling a bit. "That's good. I'm happy for him. Hopefully he'll enjoy himself."
Emerald was willing to bet that the boy was likely debating the logistics of killing and burying Nora Valkyrie somewhere in a shallow grave herself, but perhaps the entire universe had gone crazy, and Mercury really was enjoying himself out there in the middle of nowhere.
Yeah, sure, and maybe Cinder would come to regret her evil ways and choose to live the remainder of her life as a nun or something.
Emerald snorted at her own stupid joke.
"Still, what is this about, then, if not about them?"
Ah, right. The topic at hand.
The topic Emerald was doing her best to avoid talking about.
"It was… well… I mean, I suppose it had something to do with Cinder, given she was there when it happened, uhm…" Emerald rubbed the back of her neck, trying to find something for her hands to do. "I got, uh… hit on, I guess you'd call it."
Ms. Goodwitch seemed surprised for a moment, her eyebrows arcing high on her forehead, before her face split into this great beaming smile a moment later.
"That's wonderful!" Ms. Goodwitch said, before her face went white the next moment. "Unless it wasn't wonderful. This person didn't try and make you do anything, did they? Didn't proposition you or try and–"
"N-No! No!" Emerald again rushed to reassure the woman, feeling like a fool. "At least I don't think so, uhm… Cinder basically told me what happened. There was a clerk there and she– actually, y'know what, I should probably start at the beginning."
"Please," Glynda nodded her head.
Emerald walked her through the events as they'd happened. Her going to find Coco, Coco leading the charge to find Cinder something that would suit her on her date with Goodwitch – ah, damn, Emerald had actually been using her stress over this whole 'Coco' thing to forget about that for a bit – and then Cinder had suddenly said that Coco wanted to sleep with her.
She'd left that last part out, instead making it seem like Cinder had said Coco was merely interested in her.
"Ah, I see." Ms. Goodwitch nodded her head. "Coco Adel, hm?"
"Y-Yeah." Emerald said, looking down at the sofa. "I mean… I guess Cinder could've been lying, but I don't think she was…"
"I doubt she was, honey," Ms. Goodwitch shook her head, chuckling. "No, I believe she takes your feelings quite seriously. She wouldn't play with them."
Honey!? Emerald's mind supplied. What the hell is– No! Focus!
"No, I know that. I meant more…" Emerald still couldn't look up, and this time, it was all she could do to lamely gesture to her entire body, shrugging her shoulders. "I'm not really… as attractive as she was, so I guess I just don't–"
Ms. Goodwitch's disapproving hum cut her off.
"H-Huh?"
"None of that." Ms. Goodwitch said; a hard look in her eyes as she stood up out of the chair she'd pulled up in front of the coffee table and instead sat down on the couch beside Emerald. "Emerald I want you to look at me, okay?"
Emerald couldn't quite bear to do as she was asked, instead facing away from the woman who was sat down beside her.
"…Emerald. Do you feel as if you're not attractive?"
She still wouldn't look Ms. Goodwitch's way.
"…I'm not." She finally said. "If I was then… then maybe Cinder would…"
"Everyone has tastes, Ms. Sustrai." Ms. Goodwitch said with a long and drawn-out sigh, before continuing. "You've said yourself that you find me 'oh so terribly attractive',"
Emerald groaned in raw shame.
"But even I was turned down on quite a few occasions, for both women and men that I myself, in my infinite ego as a teenaged girl, found less attractive than I was. As it turns out, beauty is not on a scale. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder."
Emerald didn't say anything for a while after that. She just quietly fed ice cream into her lips, frowning a bit.
"So, what, some random girl in a clothing store thinks I'm pretty, but Cinder won't even…" Emerald bit down on her bottom lip. "She won't even look at me that way. I…" She shook her head, feeling angry, bitter tears that she'd been holding back for weeks now surfacing. "She looks right through me, all the time, and it…"
A hand came to rest on her own, and Emerald had half a mind to rip into the woman sitting beside her, to try and blame her for all of this, for succumbing to Cinder's affections, for being enthralled by her like Emerald was, but…
How could she blame her for that? When she'd done the exact same thing. When she'd fallen just as hard – harder – for a Cinder who wasn't even disguising the bits and pieces of herself that made her so broken.
Emerald could only really turn her own hand around and squeeze the one in her own.
"I'm sorry. I shouldn't be–"
"You should be." Ms. Goodwitch shook her head. "Sharing your feelings is important, Ms. Sustrai. It is very important. Feel no shame in doing so."
She let out a breath, nodding her head to show the woman she agreed, even if maybe, deep down inside, she really didn't.
"So… What do you plan to do?"
"Hm?"
"In regards to Ms. Adel's interest in you." Ms. Goodwitch clarified. "What are your intentions? Will you turn her down, or perhaps…?"
"I just…" Emerald sighed. "It's not like she has any reason to actually like me. She just thought I was cute, I guess. I'm not… like… interesting. I don't have anything to offer in a relationship."
"And why do you think that?"
She didn't really know, so she said as much.
Ms. Goodwitch just hummed, as if she'd expected that response somehow.
"Ms. Sustrai… I'm going to say something that I want you to listen to. I mean really listen to."
Emerald didn't really see much point, but she nodded lazily.
"You are not some commodity to be valued."
Emerald's brow drew down in confusion, even as she turned to see Ms. Goodwitch staring at her with a look of steel set in her gaze.
"What?"
"I'm saying that you seem to have this idea that you are only valuable, or worthwhile if you're attractive, or interesting, or have something to offer. And that's simply not the case. You have inherent value, Ms. Sustrai, because there is not another you on Remnant. No one else will ever be you. And you," She said, reaching out and poking Emerald just above her left breast. "Will never be anyone else."
"…I'm not following."
Ms. Goodwitch hummed then, seemingly trying to figure out a way to better phrase her intent, but in the next moment, Emerald keyed into something, figured out what it was the woman had been trying to tell her.
"…You're saying to stop comparing myself to Cinder, aren't you?"
Ms. Goodwitch didn't say anything for a while after that, before she nodded smally, a subtle incline of her head.
"I am."
"I…" Emerald's jaw clenched. "How can I not? She's just so… so much more…"
"Emerald, she is no better a person than you are."
"She's far more beautiful, far more interesting, and sophisticated, far more powerful, far more–"
"And I am also willing to bet that she is a far poorer person to lean on when the going gets tough." Ms. Goodwitch interrupted her, now with a fire that hung about her words. "I'm willing to bet that she is not nearly as modest as you are. That she is not nearly as loyal, or as heartfelt."
Emerald bit down on the inside of her cheek hard enough that it bled just a little, the taste of iron coating her mouth.
"…None of those things mean anything."
Ms. Goodwitch's eyes gleamed for a moment, as if she'd caught something, and was ready to pounce upon it.
"Is that true; do you truly believe that, or are you simply downplaying yourself? Downplaying your own accomplishments?"
Emerald's mouth hung open for just a moment, before she swallowed on some spittle hanging at the back of her throat and looked away.
She heard as Ms. Goodwitch shifted in her seat, the sound of the leather squeaking. "I must admit, Ms. Sustrai, I have some experience with this."
…Ah, right.
See. Some part of her supplied. You're not special.
She would say this to anyone. She would help anyone like this. She already had before. And she would long after Emerald left this place. After it was just a smoking hole in the crust of Remnant.
"What, with counseling another student who came by asking for help?" She asked bitterly, unable to help herself in some morbid case of self-flagellation.
"No." Ms. Goodwitch shook her head, smiling a bit sorrowfully. "In my own daily life. In myself."
That was…
Such bullshit!
There was no way that Glynda Goodwitch could possibly believe herself to not be deserving of praise!
Emerald felt the need to say as much.
"That's… No chance!" She turned towards the woman, feeling some anger build up inside of her. "You're so… amazing! You're always trying to help me, and you're always there to talk to… you always offer an ear to me, even when it's late, and you're supposed to be on break, and… and you let me sleep on your couch when my team was fighting with me, you… you helped me out so much… you can't possibly think you're not worthy of praise!"
Glynda Goodwitch smiled, then, and some part of Emerald understood that she'd been caught.
"And I would say the same things to you."
Emerald's jaw hung open.
"…Wha…?" She shook her head, unable to accept that. "I…No. I'm nothing like you. I… I keep messing up, and I keep doing all these dumb things, and–"
"None of that," Ms. Goodwitch said again, reaching over and lightly bopping Emerald on the shoulder. "You are a wonderfully bright young girl, Ms. Sustrai. You excel in almost all your courses. You are at the top of your class. In both the physical and academic sides of Beacon's classes. You are most pointedly not dumb. You lack awareness of social situations because you have never been allowed to live them. That does not make you dumb. The fact that you could possibly believe you are not a perfectly smart and capable young woman, that you are not a wonderful person deserving of happiness, astounds and saddens me."
Emerald felt tears building in her eyes, even if she couldn't make herself look away from the woman in front of her.
Ms. Goodwitch leaned forward, smiling as she looked right into Emerald's eyes. "You are anything you want to be. So please, do not let me catch you saying such words about yourself in my presence again."
And for some reason, even hearing all of that, Emerald still had a question she wanted to ask.
"…Or?"
"Hm? Is it not obvious?" Glynda Goodwitch smirked mirthfully."I'll simply have to acquire a few more flavors of ice cream."
Her brain processed those words for a moment in absolute quiet, before a watery smile split Emerald's lips, and she found herself unable to hold back the mirth that had built within her. it spilled from out of her lips like a waterfall, flowing out of her light and free, a high-pitched thing that was so terribly unlike her.
Eventually, once she'd managed to calm down, shaking away the emotions hanging about her, she rubbed at the back of her neck a bit awkwardly, unsure of where to go from here.
"So, uh…"
"If you'd like my advice?"
"I… think I would."
"Talk to Ms. Adel." Ms. Goodwitch said, smiling wryly. "Communicate with her what you want. If you're interested in her, then say so. If you're not, then say that. But believe in yourself. Please. You are every bit as deserving of love as anyone else."
Emotion swelled within her again, even as she was practically forced to look away from the woman still sat beside her, offering her hand, hard and callous as it was – much like her own – to her.
"Yeah, I…" She laughed a bit pathetically. "I think I will."
"I'm glad. Come back and talk to me no matter what you decide, alright?"
Emerald nodded her head, feeling so much lighter than she had when she'd first come to Ms. Goodwitch's door, when she'd first arrived here.
She needed to communicate that. She had to. So, finally, she took a breath, prepared herself, and turned her head.
"I'm uh… I'm grateful." She said, before realizing she should probably be a little more… forward, perhaps.
"Just…" She smiled as brightly as she could. "Thank you, Mom."
…
It took Emerald a second or two to realize what she'd just said on accident. The words that'd just slipped through her lips. And in the moment after that, as Ms. Goodwitch's eyes widened with realization, her own face went white as a sheet.
"…Ms. Sustrai–"
It was far too late.
Emerald had already fled out the door.
End Chapter 16
Well.
That happened.
Two chapters in a row that being Emerald is suffering. Will it end soon?
Probably not.
Next chapter – The 'date' on the 27th! I'm going to be honest; shit's going to get wacky as hell in the next few chapters. I hope you're as excited as I am for it! These two chapters – 16 and the next one, 17 – were some of my favorites to write in a long time. And we've got more good stuff to come!
