Homelander wasn't sure what had possessed him to take Ryan, but he had done it. As soon as Victoria had left, he'd sat down on the floor of the balcony and almost cried like a little child. He'd never felt so alone and had done everything in his power to restrain himself from chasing after her and pleading with her to forgive him or simply dragging her back to the penthouse. He should have done that. After all, he was the Homelander. That was what he told people. He told them that he could do whatever he wanted to do. But clearly that was a lie because he didn't want Victoria to have gone. He didn't want her to leave him all alone, but she had and he had just let her. He had actively told her to go.
Because he knew, somewhere deep down, that he couldn't be his true self with her. He knew that the chances were incidents were going to happen and he wasn't going to keep apologising for them, but she would always want him to do that. She saw him as the true saviour of America when, in reality, he was doing it for himself. He did this for himself, not out of the pure goodness of his heart. He did it because he needed to be loved and adored and he knew that she would not do that, not if he wanted to embrace what he truly thought.
That didn't mean that he wasn't hurting. He was hurting more than he had actually thought possible, but he had to keep that to himself. He'd had a hearing to go to and had been amazed when Vogelbaum had turned up to testify against Vought. He would have thought that man would have lived in hiding for the rest of his life after what he'd done to him. But there he was, bold as brass and ready to give his opinion.
Everyone from the Seven had been at the hearing, except for Starlight who was now a wanted criminal, claims being thrown against her that she was a spy and had worked to kill Translucent. Of course, Homelander knew that was rubbish, but people seemed to enjoy hearing it. They'd captured her easy enough, but she had somehow escaped the Tower while he had been away at the rally. How was that even possible? He would have thought that she couldn't get out, but someone had clearly helped her and his money was on Hughie.
As soon as the hearing had started, the first question had just been asked when it happened. Homelander had moved his hand up defensively to shield his face from the incoming blood in his direction. People began shrieking loudly, standing up and running around. Homelander remained stood and remained rooted to the spot, Maeve also moving to her feet and Stormfront copying.
"What the hell is going on here?" Stormfront was the one to ask, still looking at Vogelbaum's body, his head having exploded clean from his shoulders.
Homelander could only shrug, not entirely certain what he was witnessing as another head exploded on some political aide and he lifted his hand up again to protect his eyesight. People's heads continued to explode, blood spluttering everywhere and the yells of people growing louder. People tried to run away from the room, clambering over each other to get out. But they had the right idea and he was beginning to see that. He shook his head slowly and took one more glimpse to Vogelbaum's dead body.
"We need to go," Homelander said to the members of the Seven who were still with him. "I have no idea what the fuck is happening here, but we need to get out."
"But we need to find who is doing this!" Maeve exclaimed, arm outstretched in front of her.
Homelander looked down to her, glaring intensely. "And how do we do that? We can hardly find them if we don't know what they look like or how they're doing this…and I don't really want my head to pop off my shoulders."
"He's right," Stormfront said as the screams continued to echo around the room but the heads seemed to stop exploding, leaving nothing but a trail of decapitated bodies strewn around the floor. "We need to go and then we can look back and find out who might have done this."
"But-"
"-Now, Maeve," Homelander snapped at her and she knew she had no other option but to follow him. She was hardly going to go against him when he was in a volatile mood. He had been for most of the week and she had noticed that Victoria hadn't been around either.
The news hadn't been made public, but Maeve was fairly certain that Homelander had broken up with his fiancée. But Maeve knew what he was like. He was possessive. The reason she had kept her relationship with Elena hidden was out of fear of him. She had seen what he had done to guys who had flirted with her. It only made her wonder if he truly was going to leave Victoria alone to move on because, as soon as she did, that would be when the jealousy would hit and Maeve knew all too well what the outcome would be.
Homelander shook his head and began to lead them out of the room and he longed for nothing more than getting back to the Tower where he knew his son would be waiting.
…
Victoria had been on her way to the location Billy had given her when she had seen the news on a large TV screen on the side of a building. She'd stood and stared in horror and shock, people gathering around and wondering just what they were witnessing. The hearing against Vought had gone terribly wrong. People had been killed, but no one was sure by who or how it happened. It was clear what had happened. People's heads had exploded clean off of their bodies in scenes that reminded Victoria of some terrible horror film.
Her hand had gone over her mouth and she had felt nauseous at the sight, unable to believe that the news was showing in full the replay of what had happened. She watched on as bodies fell to the ground, blood splattering all around and people screaming in fear as the news anchors spoke over the scenes, informing people that they had no idea what had been going on.
She stopped watching after the third repeat, unable to look at it anymore as she noted Homelander in the background, looking clearly confused at what was going on. That was enough for Victoria to understand that he had nothing to do with this. He had no idea what was going on. Moving towards the place where Billy had told her to meet him, she followed the beeping dot on the map on her phone. She finally came to what looked like a pawn shop and she frowned. This couldn't be the place.
Just as she was about to call Billy, the door opened and she saw Annie step out of the shop with Hughie in tow. Victoria's eyes widened and she almost wanted to cry at seeing her. Moving to her, she gave her no time to think before her arms were firmly wrapped around her. Victoria held onto her tightly and Annie's arms wrapped around her as well.
"Thank God you're okay," Victoria whispered in a soft voice to her, closing her eyes and scrunching her face up. She needed someone who was a friendly face and Annie had always been there for her. "I tried to get him to let you go, but he wouldn't listen to me…I didn't know what to do and I asked Billy to help you."
"Well, I'm out and alright," she promised Victoria. "And I knew that there was nothing you could do. Homelander is fully against me right now."
Victoria pulled back and sniffed. Annie looked to her, keeping her hands on her shoulders and looking to her. She seemed pale and gaunt, like she was struggling even more than usual. "How did you get out?" Victoria asked.
"Hughie got me out," Annie said and he held a hand up.
"Still here," he said and Victoria managed a soft smile to him.
"Hey, Hughie," she greeted him and he chuckled.
"That's a better greeting than ever before," he said to her and she smiled sadly, remembering how both times before she had almost threatened to break his arm when she'd seen him. She took a moment to inhale a sharp breath and sniff.
"You need to be careful. Homelander is out for your blood and if he finds out where you are then he…I don't know what he'll do…but you must have seen the hearing. It was a complete mess and Vought are still there."
"I know," Annie said to her with a nod. "But Maeve was the one who helped me escape too when Noir came after me at the Tower. We're going to see if we can try to get her to testify against them. I'm a war criminal so I doubt I'd be any good."
"You think Maeve will do it?"
"I don't know, but it's worth asking," she said and Victoria nodded, biting down on her tongue and looking around, eyes darting around the street nervously. Annie picked up on the movement and she furrowed her brow. "Vic, are you sure you're alright? Hughie told me that Homelander just let you go."
"I…later…" Victoria decided on saying. She wanted to spill everything to Annie. She wanted to tell her what was going on and how she had no idea what was going on. But she couldn't say any of that. Instead, she just nodded her head firmly and tried to act stronger than she clearly felt. "Can we talk later on today, please?"
"Of course, yeah," Annie said and Victoria hugged her tightly once more.
Looking to Hughie over Victoria's shoulder, she shot him a puzzled expression before he shrugged. Moving back to the door of the shop, Hughie held it open.
"If you head on down to the back, just knock on the door and they'll let you in," Hughie said to Victoria as she let Annie go.
Moving through the pawnshop, Victoria knocked on the door that Hughie had told her to knock on. She waited patiently before the door opened and a man with a short haircut answered it. She recognised him from one of Homelander's files. He was one of Billy's associates.
"You must be Victoria," he said and she instantly recognised the French accent as he stepped aside and let her into the room. "Billy's told us a lot about you and, of course, we've seen you on the television."
"Yeah," was all Victoria could manage to him as she shot him a soft smile that he returned after a moment to her. She took another second to look around the basement, struggling to believe that her brother was living in such a place. It was dark and dismal, clearly not meant for people to live in.
"This is your sister?" another voice asked and Victoria looked to the end of the room where she saw Billy stood with a tall man, arms folded.
"Yeah," Billy's voice said in a gruff tone. "This is Victoria. Vicky, this is M.M.," he indicated to the man next to him and then pointed to the one who had let Victoria in. "Frenchie," he said and Victoria managed a soft wave over to the both of them. "And that's Kimiko."
Looking to the corner, Victoria saw the girl sat there, legs crossed and perched on the sofa. She raised her own hand and Victoria looked around at the three of them. "Nice to meet you all."
"Billy's told us so much about you…about your PhD…and the work you've done with the UN," M.M. said to her and she looked to her brother, amazed that he had even mentioned her. She glanced over to M.M. and smiled gleefully in his direction.
"Has he really?"
"He's a very proud big brother," Frenchie commented, a smile on his face as Billy rolled his eyes.
"Well, apart from the fact you were engaged to Homelander…he wasn't so keen on that part," M.M. tacked on.
"I believe he might have said-"
"-Alright, that's enough," Billy interrupted, raising his hands in front of him and urging for his friends to calm down. Looking between them, he motioned with his head to the edge of the room. "Think you lot can give us some privacy while I talk to my sister?"
"Sure," M.M. said, clearly enjoying teasing Butcher and Victoria had to confess that she found that amusing.
Folding her arms over her chest, she took the final step down to the ground and followed her brother over to the corner of the room where he sat down on the edge of a broken table. Victoria folded her arms over her waist, tugging her red coat firmly over around herself. She looked to her brother and she saw that he was looking at her intently, clearly sensing that something was wrong. And he was right. Something was very wrong and she had no idea how to say it to him because she was scared he wouldn't help her when he was the only one she had now.
"Why did he let you go, Vic?" he asked from her.
He was dressed in a black jumper, sleeves rolled up to his elbows. She crossed her ankles, the leather of her boots squelching against each other and she noted a small pull in her tights. Her coat covered the a-line skirt she wore and she was suddenly feeling too warm in the cherry coloured sweater she had on under her coat.
"I…if I tell you that I'm not entirely sure, will that help?" Victoria asked from her brother and she knew that he'd never have let her go if he knew what was going on. "I was just sat there and he asked me if I would ever love him like I did and I told him no. I don't think that he could handle it…knowing that I know…and even if he wiped my mind again, he wouldn't be able to be his true self. You've seen the news. You've seen what him and Stormfront are spouting. He knows I'd never agree with any of it…it's just pure fascism."
Billy weighed up his sister's answer thoughtfully and he knew that she was telling him the truth. She sniffed again and he noted that she looked almost unhealthy. She looked worse than she ever had done when she was with Homelander. Her cheeks were pale and her eyes seemed bloodshot, like she hadn't even slept. Was she scared of Homelander coming after her?
"Well, the hearing went to shit so we're coming up with a different way to stop Vought," Billy said. "I've got no idea if it's going to work, but we're making some weapons and Hughie and Annie have gone to see if they can get another supe on board."
"You think weapons are going to bring down Vought?"
"No idea, but I know we can't just sit around and wait for something to happen," Billy said to his sister. "That's why I didn't want you coming here, Vic. I don't want you near any of this, even if Homelander is out of the picture. But you sounded like you needed to talk so here we are. What's going on?"
Victoria's mouth opened and she struggled to let out the words she wanted to say. She looked to her brother and she knew that there was no chance he was going to be happy with what she had to tell him. But she was so scared of him telling her to go. She was so scared of him telling her that he wasn't going to help her and that she had to do this on her own. Why would he not? He despised supe and, even more than that, he despised Homelander.
"Vicky, what is it?" he asked from his sister and she shook her head, tears forming in her eyes and building up there.
"Please don't hate me," she pleaded with her brother, begging him not to break her heart. She shook her head slowly and Billy stood up straight and moved to her. He wrapped his arms around her and she moved hers around him, clinging onto him like she had done all those years ago when she was a sixteen-year-old girl and she needed him. He instantly stood up straighter at that thought and wondered exactly what was going on.
"What is it?" he asked, hands going to her shoulders and holding them tightly. She couldn't even look him in the eye. "Have you gone back to him?"
"No," Victoria said, shaking her head firmly and clinging to her brother. "I…I didn't…I mean…I don't want to."
Billy frowned. "What is that supposed to mean? Has he done something to you? Has he threatened you?"
"Billy, he-"
"-Butcher, you've got another visitor."
Billy looked over to M.M. and saw him stood at the bottom of the stairs. "Not now," he said gruffly.
"You're going to want to deal with this," M.M. said to him and before Billy could argue again with him, he shook his head firmly. "It's Becca."
"Becca?" Butcher checked.
"Go," Victoria said, moving from her brother and wiping her eyes. She stepped back and nodded to him, trying to make out that she was fine. But she was just a coward. She was a coward because, despite everything her brother had done, she didn't want him to look at her with disappointment as she feared her might do if he knew the truth. And so she took the easy way out. She took the way out that bought her more time. "Go to her because it's clearly important."
He sighed, but nodded. "We're not finished," he said to his sister and let her go before heading on up the stairs.
Victoria paced around the small space, walking up and down as she tried to calm herself. She heard Becca come in with her brother, ranting and raving about how Ryan had been taken. Victoria looked to the stairs as they descended them and Becca instantly saw her. Looking at her with wide and wet eyes, Victoria could see that she was clearly upset.
"Victoria," she said her name, an air of desperation in her voice. "I need you to help me. I need you to talk to him…get him to bring Ryan home…please…I don't know where he's taken him."
"Becca, she's not with him," Billy was the one who spoke as it became clear that Victoria was struggling to comprehend what she was hearing. "She's left him."
"He let you leave?" Becca asked.
"Yeah," Victoria said. "But he's taken Ryan? When did he do this?"
"The other night," Becca said. "I've been trying to get out of that house when I knew Vought wouldn't be watching. I have no idea where he's gone, but he just came and he showed him the outside world…that he'd been living in that compound…and he hasn't brought him home."
"Shit," Victoria whispered in a low tone as she wondered what she could do to help. "I…maybe I can talk to him-"
"-Abso-fucking-lutely not," Billy was the one who said in a firm voice and Victoria looked at him before shrugging her shoulders.
"He might listen to me," she said.
"And he might not. You've just escaped his clutches, Victoria. Do you really want to go back there?"
And she didn't. She didn't want to go back there. In fact, she had no desire to go anywhere near him again, but she knew that she could help. She knew that there might be a chance that he would listen to her.
"Billy's right," Becca suddenly said, agreeing with her husband and shaking her head. "You shouldn't have to go near him, not after what he's done and now you're away from him."
"But if he has Ryan then it's because I've gone," Victoria said and she knew that made her sound big-headed. She didn't mean for it to, but it made sense. "He has this need to be loved. He's insecure and I know that sounds so stupid, but when it comes to his emotions…he's…he just needs someone to love him. And yes, he has fans and people who fawn over him, but he needs something deeper than that."
"What are you? His psychiatrist?"
"I was his fiancée," Victoria snapped back to her brother. "I've lived with him for months and he's told me things he's never told anyone else."
"He also kept things from you."
"I know, but there were things he actually did open up to me about," Victoria said. "So maybe…maybe I can help-"
"-Did you miss the part where I told you no fucking way?" Billy questioned from his sister and she huffed at him. "Listen, you two stay here and give me some time to try and find out where that flying cunt could have taken Ryan."
"The Tower," Victoria said. "He'll be at the Tower…or…"
"Or?" Becca pushed and Victoria sighed.
She moved a hand to her hair and tucked it behind her ears. "He has a cabin outside New York. We used to go there for weekends away. It's remote and secluded. No one knows about it except for a few people."
"Do you remember where it is?" Becca asked.
Victoria nodded.
"Well, that's a good place to start," Billy agreed. "But just give us an hour to look into it and make sure. You two stay here…we'll get him back, I promise you, Becca."
Victoria let the two of them have a moment, heading on to the corner of the room and perching in some old armchair. She leant forwards, burying her head in her hands and knowing that this was a big mess. Why had he taken Ryan? What had been going through his mind? Victoria sighed and realised that there was absolutely no chance of Homelander listening to anyone when it came to Ryan.
"Are you alright?"
Victoria looked up and over to Becca as she moved towards her.
"I should be asking you that," she said. "I can't believe he's taken Ryan."
"Really?" Becca questioned and sat on the chair next to Victoria's, folding her jean clad legs. "Because I guess it makes sense. He's known about Ryan for a while and he's already made his intentions clear…to teach Ryan how to use his powers."
"I tried to get him to give him time," Victoria said. "I told him that he'd make a good father, for fucks sake…and all that time…you were there, knowing what he was like and being unable to say anything. I'm sorry if I came in and poked my nose-"
"-You don't need to apologise," Becca said to her with a shake of her head. "You've got your memories back and that's all that matters. Billy told me."
"Yeah," Victoria said with a nod. "I just came here…well…I just needed to talk to Billy, but it can wait until you have Ryan back and I will talk to Homelander if it makes any difference. I'll do what I can to help you, I promise."
"No, I don't want you to go back to him, not after you've just gotten away."
Victoria nodded her head and looked down to the floor, her mind thinking up numerous scenarios about what might happen. Becca went quiet too, both of them clearly uncertain on what they should say to each other.
"When you were pregnant with Ryan…how long did it take before you gave birth?" Victoria suddenly asked and Becca frowned, remembering how that time of her life had been so isolating without Billy. She'd had no one who she could talk to. She had no one who she could confide in. She didn't know if she could do it in the end, but she'd had to. She'd had to and now she had her beautiful son.
"About five months. Ryan grew quicker than a normal baby," she said and noted Victoria wince.
"So…it wasn't normal?" she checked.
"I mean, there was the morning sickness and cravings…but…the kicks would be more forceful than I'd have imagined and sometimes I could see the glow of his eyes through my skin," Becca said and Victoria nodded before tugging her fingers through her hair anxiously. "But Ryan is the best kid I could have asked for. He's perfect and I would go through that pain all over again if I had to."
"Did you always know that you wanted him?" Victoria continued questioning, unable to stop herself, the words rolling off of her tongue. "I mean, when you were pregnant, did you not consider walking away?"
Becca shrugged. "I guess so," she admitted to Victoria. "I mean, I was raped. Ryan wasn't exactly planned or wanted back then…and I…I wondered if I could just leave him to Vought…but the first time I felt him kick in my stomach, I knew that I couldn't give him up. He's my son and I felt this connection to him…I can't explain it, but I just knew that I loved him regardless of everything that had happened and how he had gotten here."
Victoria considered what she was hearing for a few moments before she clasped her hands together and Becca studied her. The older woman placed her hands on her knees and looked to her sister-in-law with an intense stare.
"Why all the questions?" Becca enquired and Victoria only had to look at her for her to put two and two together and get the right answer. Her face fell and Becca moved a hand to her forehead, running the heel of it along it. "Fuck," she whispered.
"Yeah, fuck," Victoria agreed with her on that point.
"He doesn't know, does he?"
"Who?"
"Homelander."
"No, he hasn't got a clue," Victoria said. "I know when it happened. I'd flown back to New York to tell him about a contract extension and I'd left my pill in Paris…I totally forgot to get an emergency one the day after…that was three weeks ago."
"He can't know," Becca whispered to her and she nodded. She knew that. "But you can't do this in a normal hospital, Victoria. They don't have the resources available to help you…not like Vought do…and I knew that when I went to them."
"But I can't go to them," Victoria said. "As soon as I go to them then my options are limited. They either tell Homelander…make me live like you did…or they cut me completely out of the picture. There is no option here. I don't want to go to them…I want to sort this on my own. I want to take care of it, but I don't know how to. I came here because I thought that Billy might know. I thought that he might know how to handle the situation because I can't…I can't do this," she finished and the tears started coming again. She didn't want to do this either. She just wanted to get away. She wanted to go.
Becca nodded thoughtfully. She seemed to understand what Victoria was saying. "You know that if you choose not to go through with this then Vought can never know. You need to find someone who is willing to stay quiet."
"I know," Victoria confirmed on that point. "I just don't know if that's what I want. I don't know what I want."
"And that's understandable," Becca assured her on that point. "But you have Billy and he'll make sure that you're alright."
Victoria scoffed. "He hates supes, but more than that, he hates Homelander. I don't know how to tell him because he'll probably be disgusted, but he's the only one I can talk to about all of this with."
"He's not going to abandon you," Becca assured her. "Believe me. I married him and all he did was regret abandoning you as a kid. He won't make the same mistake twice. Will he be upset? Probably. But it doesn't matter because he'll put you first, just like he did me…and if we get away from here…if by some miracle we escape and get away from Homelander…then I can help you because I know what's coming for you."
Victoria looked at her, eyes widening and still wet. "You mean that?" she checked with her and, despite everything that was going on, Becca managed a soft smile and a nod of her head. Reaching across for Victoria's hand, she held onto it and the two women shared a moment of understanding.
…
"It had to have been Edgar who did this," Stormfront said to Homelander as they stood in the meeting room, watching the footage over once more. Noir was still in a coma after Starlight had escaped and he had been found suffering from his treenut allergy. How she had known that he had that was a mystery to Homelander, but it seemed that she was a sneaky one and she was still on the loose.
Stormfront hadn't brought up the shared kiss since it had happened, but Homelander knew the impact that it'd had on him. The press had been speculating about his relationship with Victoria, questioning where she was and if they had split up. For the time being, Homelander was maintaining a radio silence. He didn't want anyone to know anything just yet. But he knew his numbers were slipping. He was an adulterer and everyone had seen it. Ashley was constantly on at him to sort it out and plan a message to give to the press.
"Pretty clever of him," Homelander said, looking to the screen.
"I mean, I wish that I'd killed Vogelbaum, but none of that matters anymore because sooner rather than later, we're going to make sure the right people get the doses of Compound V that they need…and we won't need to do anymore premieres…no more red carpets and this dancing monkey shit."
Homelander frowned as she stood next to him and he watched her for a few moments. Did she think he hated that? Because he didn't. He enjoyed it. It was the thing that made his job bearable, knowing that he could go to these events and people adored him. But then he started thinking about what Victoria had said about Stormfront.
"And what if the wrong people get the doses?" he asked from her, looking down to her and letting his eyes move over her face, seeing how she was smiling widely at him and looking at him with those doe eyes. They weren't the same as Victoria's and he couldn't pretend they were. They didn't make his chest pang.
"Well, we'll have a plan for that too," she assured him. "But we are so close to getting what we've fought for."
"How close?" he questioned.
"A few more weeks and everything will be as it should be, but for now, I know your son is here and I really would love to meet him."
"Ryan?" he checked and Stormfront nodded. Homelander gulped but nodded his head. Maybe that wasn't such a bad idea.
…
It had been a bad idea. For some reason they had thought that going to Planet Vought was a good idea, but it had been far too much for Ryan to handle. Homelander had gotten him out of there as soon as people had started fawning around them, asking for selfies and autographs. He had obliged until Ryan had placed his hands over his ears and looked distressed. He had picked his son up and flown out of that place as soon as he could.
He'd taken Ryan to the cabin, hoping that it would give him the peace and quiet he clearly needed. His son had ran inside as soon as they'd gotten there, the door slamming behind him and Homelander had remained where he was. He wanted to go in after him, but he had no idea what to say to make it any better. What could he possibly say that would make his son feel better?
But then Stormfront had shown up and told him that he had to try and so he did. He had tentatively walked into the cabin and found Ryan reciting the names of US States, sat on the couch. Hands on his hips, he walked tentatively over to him and blew out a deep breath.
"I'm sorry," Ryan whispered.
"No, no," Homelander said quickly. "Don't you be sorry. I should be sorry. I should've known better."
Ryan leant forwards, hands clasped together. "There were just so many people," he said and Homelander's brows rose on his forehead as he sighed and stood by the couch.
"Yeah, there was," he said, eyes flickering around the cabin as he tried to think of the right thing to say to Ryan. He had lost so many people already, he wasn't going to lose his son. "You know, I remember the first time I was in a crowd."
"Probably didn't bother you," Ryan commented.
"I was terrified," Homelander said to him and his son looked up to him, eyes meeting as Homelander told him a story that he had only told one other person before while they had been laid in bed in the exact same cabin he was currently in. "All those people reaching out, trying to grab me and egging me on to use my powers…I just felt like I was drowning."
"What did you do?" Ryan questioned.
Moving his cape to the side, Homelander sat next to his son. "I flew away," he said as Stormfront moved to stand in the doorway, listening in on the two of them having their conversation. "They found me eighty miles down the I-9 crying my little eyes out."
"Did you cry?" Ryan asked.
"Yes," Homelander confessed. "But I'm a man…so not in a long while." Ryan didn't need to know that he had cried on the balcony of his penthouse when Victoria had walked out the door. "And you know, maybe one day you'll be able to fly away from it too…just like me…and maybe with me."
Ryan seemed to grow uncomfortable then. "I know you want me to be like you, but, dad, I'm not," he said with a shake of his head and he looked to Homelander. It was then when he saw the insecurities in his son's face. He was so worried about disappointing Homelander when he could never really do that.
"Look, son, I didn't just wake up one day and fly out the door. That's not how it works. I had to learn," he said in a soft voice. "Only I didn't have anyone to teach me…the doctors…" he trailed off, not wanting Ryan to know of what he had gone through in his childhood. "The people who raised me," he corrected himself, "they were scared of me and so I didn't have anyone around to tell me how to use my powers, but you do. You have me and I'll teach you."
"Really?" he asked and Homelander saw a little kid just looking for comfort.
"I love you," Homelander said to him and Ryan seemed to relent then, moving slowly towards Homelander. Wrapping an arm around his small shoulders, Homelander held onto him gently and ran his hand along his upper arm. "It's all going to be okay."
"I know," Ryan agreed with him on that point. "Will Victoria help me too?"
"Well," Homelander said, gulping and swallowing down the lump in his throat. How did he explain this one? "Victoria isn't with me anymore. We split up."
"Oh," Ryan said, voice falling flat. "I liked her. She was good at building Lego with me."
"Yeah, she was," Homelander agreed on that part, closing his eyes and remembering the day she had sat in the garden with Ryan, skirt flared out around her and smile on her face as she laughed and joked with Ryan. He swore not to cry on that point, but he was finding it difficult when all he wanted was to go and find her and bring her back.
"Why did she leave?"
"She…sometimes…grown-ups just drift apart," he said. "It's not because we don't love each other, but it's just because it sometimes doesn't work out and that's okay. Victoria is going to be okay and so am I. I have you, don't I?"
"Yeah, you do," Ryan confirmed and Homelander squeezed him tighter.
"Then that's good enough for me."
….
Looking around the large field, Victoria took a deep breath. She knew what the plan was, but she wasn't entirely certain if it would come off. Homelander might be many things, but stupid wasn't one of them. He was clever and particularly conniving too. As soon as he heard the loud-pitched noises, he'd suspect that something was going on. He was vulnerable to loud noises, clearly a negative to having super hearing. Becca had made sure to grab a pair of earmuffs for Ryan to cancel out the noise.
"You think this will work?" Victoria asked her brother as they waited for the sonic device to be activated.
"Don't know," Billy confessed to his sister. "All I know is that I need to get them out of here…and you need to take the other car because if Ryan is taken from him then I'm worried he'll come back for you."
"Yeah, you and me both," Victoria admitted, looking out to the field in front of her.
The rest of the gang were underneath the steel shelter, armed with weapons and vehicles in case the worst happened. Annie and Hughie had come back to them with a bombshell of information, revealing the Stormfront was actually the wife of Frederick Vought and, more importantly, a Nazi. Victoria had scoffed. She could have told them that. But there was proof. And that proof had been leaked to the press.
"What was it you wanted to tell me?" Billy wondered, looking down to his sister and seeing how she kept her coat wrapped tightly around her body. She didn't look up to him. Instead, she just shook her head and tried to pretend that everything was fine. That couldn't be further from the truth, of course, but her brother didn't need to know that just yet. They had more important things to focus on.
"We can discuss it another time," Victoria said to her brother, trying to brush him off. But she knew that Billy was persistent. She saw him open his mouth and she quickly held a hand up, urging for him to keep quiet. "Billy, can we please just do this another time? Right now, we need to think about getting Ryan away from Homelander and back with Becca."
Billy didn't protest any further, despite wanting to. "As soon as that device is activated then you get out of here," he said to his sister. "If we take Ryan from him then you know that he might come back for you."
"I know," Victoria confessed. She knew that he definitely would if he knew the truth. "But I'll be fine. I promise. I'm not leaving here until I know you have Ryan and then I'll go."
She didn't want to go. She wanted to stay in New York, but she knew that she couldn't. While she had been in the basement under the pawnshop she had asked Billy if there was any way she could get her hands on a fake passport. He had asked her why, but she had assured him it was just in case. He'd told her that he'd get one sorted, but in the meantime he expected her to go to Grace Mallory who had promised her that she could protect her. Victoria didn't know if that was true, but she didn't comment on it.
She was due to drive in the opposite direction to Becca, both of them splitting up and then meeting at the same place. There was always going to be a chance Homelander would find them and it would be for the best if he didn't find them together.
"We're on!"
M.M. suddenly yelled from inside the metal shelter. Billy nodded once and pointed to his sister. "Stay here," he said to her.
She rolled her eyes at his bossiness, but she wasn't intending on going anywhere else anytime soon. She watched him and Becca take off in the car, ready to go and fetch Ryan as the loud screeching noise wailed through the clearing. Victoria continued staring into the distance as Annie approached, dressed in jeans and a hoodie.
"You okay?" Annie asked from her.
Victoria nodded, forcing a smile onto her face. "Fine," she promised her in a gentle voice. "I mean, I will be when we get out of here."
"Yeah, you and me both," Annie agreed on that point.
They lapsed into silence then and Annie rocked back and forth on her heels. She looked over Victoria, noting the way she was staring almost vacantly, like she was stuck in her own head. And she was. She was completely in her own head.
"You said earlier that you wanted to talk-"
"-I'm pregnant," Victoria blurted out and Annie stammered.
She just had to say it because she knew that as soon as she was with Mallory then there was no chance she could come back. Her normal life was gone. The idea of going back to Paris had died the moment that positive result had come back. And while Victoria didn't know what to do about being pregnant, she knew that she had to do something. Doing nothing wasn't an option.
"What?" Annie snapped loudly and Victoria looked to her with a sad smile.
"I said something similar to that when I found out," she said to her. "It's his, of course…and I must only be a few weeks gone, but I'm definitely pregnant."
"Shit," Annie whispered and moved her hands to her head, holding it firmly as she looked to the sky. "Vicky…what are you going to do?"
Victoria shrugged. "Disappear, I guess. I need to do what Becca did…but I don't want Vought's intervention. I want to do this without them because I'm not living a life like she did."
"And you think you can do that?"
"If Homelander never finds out then yes," Victoria confirmed with a nod of her head. "But I need to disappear…he can never find me because if he does then there will be no getting away from him. He'll never let me leave if he knows I'm pregnant."
"You think he will just let you go anyway?" Annie checked with her and Victoria shrugged.
"I honestly don't know, but I can't wait around to find out," Victoria said to her and Annie knew that was sensible.
"Does Billy know?"
"I haven't told him yet," Victoria said with a shake of her head, feeling almost upset that she hadn't told her brother. "I'm going to do it when we're out of here…I mean…I've no idea if he'll ever talk to me again."
"He's your brother."
"Who despises supes and Homelander," Victoria tacked on the end of that comment. "So I'm not exactly holding out too much hope…but maybe he'll be okay in the end."
Annie could only nod supportively. She wanted to believe that maybe Billy could put aside his prejudice for the time being. She didn't know if that was possible, but she longed for it to be for Victoria's sake.
"I just…I don't want to imagine that this is the last time I'll see you," Annie confessed to Victoria and Victoria could only smile sadly in an attempt to stop herself from crying.
"I know," she agreed in a whisper. "But there might be a way…in the future…I don't know…but I've got to try and stay optimistic because right now all I want to do is cry all the time."
"You're braver than I would be right now," Annie promised. "And I'll tell Homelander nothing, that goes without saying."
"Thank you," Victoria said gratefully before they heard the squealing of tyres.
Billy and Becca quickly got back to the shelter, jumping out of the car with Ryan in tow, Becca's hand holding onto his. Billy moved over to M.M. as Victoria watched on, seeing her brother hissing something to his friend and she wondered just what was going on. The plan had been for Billy to take them to Mallory and Victoria meet them there.
"M.M. is going to take you and Ryan to safety," Billy said to Becca, but she was shaking her head profusely, clearly not taken with the idea. She reached for her husband, hands going to his shoulders.
"You have to come with us," she pleaded from him, eyes wide and face wild, almost building up to hyperventilating. "Billy, come with us…you said you would."
"No," Billy said, acutely aware everyone was watching them but not caring. Becca was all that mattered. "I can't go with you because I was going to sell you out to Vought…I was going to let Edgar keep Ryan. But fuck me I couldn't do it because you're raising that kid right, Becca. You're raising him right and I can't be around him because I'd fuck it up. I'm not doing that."
Victoria wanted to snap at her brother, but she knew better than to get involved in their fight. Kimiko and Frenchie exchanged nervous glances as Hughie looked to the ground and Annie ran a hand along his back. M.M. hovered by the driver's side car door, waiting to go whenever Butcher told him to.
Becca watched her husband and shook her head, gulping and blinking back tears. "But you didn't sell us out. You did the right thing in the end and that says so much about you…more than you think…you're not a bad man, Billy. You're my husband and I don't want to lose you again."
"I know," Billy said and Victoria could hear the heartache in his tone. She knew it well. He clasped Becca's cheeks in his hands, thumbs running along her cheekbones. "But you need to go and look after Ryan. You're his mum and he needs you…we had our time…and I know it hurts…I know it's shit…but you need to be with him and I can't come with you. It'd be too dangerous. You know that."
She went silent. That spoke volumes, confirming that she did know that. She could say no more. There was nothing that would make anything better and so she reached for him and kissed him firmly. Everyone turned around to give them privacy before they pulled away, Billy opening the door to the car for Becca and she climbed in, still crying as M.M. finally sat down and started the engine. Looking to his wife, Billy saw her hands cover her mouth as she looked down and realised that it would be the last time she saw him.
"Vicky," Billy said as M.M. pulled out of the shelter. "You need to go."
"Billy-"
"-We don't have time, Victoria, so get in the car and go."
"I don't want to leave you," Victoria confessed to him and Annie bit down on her bottom lip, wondering if she should say something.
"I know, but you have to. For now, you have to go and I can't know where you're going. It's for the best…if things quieten down…if I can take care of Homelander…then I'll find you, just like I'll find, Becca."
He still intended on going through with his plan to try and kill Homelander. That wasn't going to change.
"I don't want that, Billy. I don't want to go-"
"-You have to because I'm not letting you go back to him. I couldn't protect you before and I'm not going to abandon you now. I'm doing what I should have done years ago."
Victoria watched her brother and could see that he was trying to make amends. It was clear. And she knew that he was right. Homelander would be coming after Ryan soon enough. Victoria didn't want to stick around. She moved for her brother and wrapped her arms firmly around him as he held her back. She closed her eyes and pressed her forehead against his shoulder.
"Come on," he said to her as he kept her in his arms and then urged for her to go. He opened the driver's door and Victoria looked to Annie who just nodded once and tried not to cry. She didn't want this to be the last time she saw her, but it could be. "Vicky, come on."
"I'm going," Victoria said to her brother and she pecked him on the cheek. "You know, despite everything, I really do love you."
"I love you too," he said to her and moved a hand to her shoulder. "But you need to go. I'll do everything I can to see you again, I promise."
"I know," Victoria said to him and she climbed into the car.
Shutting the door, Billy watched her start the engine and slip the car into drive. Her foot pressed down on the gas and she looked straight ahead as she drove off. Glancing in her rearview mirror at the gang behind her, Victoria wanted to turn back as she drove in the opposite direction to Becca. She moved onto the dirt track behind the trees, completely oblivious to Stormfront's attack on Ryan, Becca and M.M.
Victoria continued driving, foot steady on the gas before she saw him. He flew overhead and Victoria stopped the car, slamming her foot onto the brake. She left the engine running as she stepped out and looked up. He was heading in the opposite direction. He was heading back towards where Becca and Ryan should have gone. Victoria shook her head and closed her eyes.
If he got Ryan then it would break Becca. She loved her son more than anything. Billy had given his wife up to keep that kid safe. Ryan needed his mum because without her then he would just turn into a mini version of Homelander and who would benefit from that? Victoria slammed a fist on the roof of the car and she closed her eyes, knowing that she had to go back. She pressed her palm to her own stomach and knew that her fate would be sealed. But what would he do if he got to Becca and Billy? He wouldn't spare them and Victoria couldn't live knowing that she had done nothing. She had to at least try to find them.
Climbing back into the car, she did a sharp u-turn and took the track back to the field, but stopped on the edge. She hid in the trees, turning the engine off as she saw Annie, Kimiko and Maeve fighting Stormfront. Where had Maeve even come from? Victoria didn't know, but she knew that she would be no help to them. She was better off trying to find Homelander.
And then Victoria saw the smoking car in the distance. It was the one that M.M. had been driving, but it was empty. Putting two and two together, she figured that Stormfront had stopped them before they could get away. That meant they had to be running and hiding.
Moving into the trees, she abandoned the car when she realised she couldn't use it. It wouldn't get between the trees. Victoria ran through the trees in the direction she suspected they would have gone. She had no idea how long she kept running as she saw Stormfront moved overhead. She must have gotten away from the others. Victoria followed the same direction she was going, trying not to trip over anything as her red coat flapped open around her and her cheeks turned red.
"Mom…mom…I'm sorry…mommy…"
The wails were loud and she recognised them as Ryan's. Victoria continued following the yells before she came to the small clearing. She stumbled to a walk as she digested the sight in front of her. Stormfront was on the floor, her body completely charred and her legs missing. Her face had been burned and her hair was missing. She was muttering something incomprehensible, Homelander stood over her. Victoria came to a sudden stop and tried not to gag at the sight before she saw Becca on the ground by a tree, Billy kneeling over her and holding her. Ryan was stood to one side, soft sobs racking his body.
"Ryan, did you do this?" Homelander's voice called out and Victoria saw that he was also covered in blood.
She remained a good distance back, not sure what was about to happen as Billy forced himself to his feet.
"I'm sorry…I didn't mean to," Ryan said, tears streaming down his face. He'd killed his mother. How had it happened? Victoria suspected he had tried to protect her from Stormfront and had no idea how to use his powers.
Billy held a crowbar in his hands as he turned to face Homelander who had moved away from Stormfront, his face almost looking pained. She had been his ally. He might not have loved her as she loved him, but he did care.
"Let's go," Homelander said to his son, standing tall. "Come here." He held his hand out to him, but Ryan didn't move. "Come," he beckoned. But Ryan was moving towards Billy and Victoria watched with bated breath from behind them. "Ryan.." Homelander's voice was growing terse, sounding like a warning. "Come here."
But Ryan stood behind Billy. Butcher didn't move. He just shook his head once. "No," he said and Homelander started laughing manically, looking to the sky and Victoria recognised his threatening tone as he glared back at Billy.
"He's mine," he said. "What, are you going to blow yourself up? To save that little shit who murdered your wife."
"I promised," Billy simply said.
Homelander shook his head. "Have it your way," he said and began advancing towards Billy.
It was then when Victoria moved. "John."
She called his name and he instantly froze on the spot. His shoulders tensed up and he looked straight ahead, the sound of his name on her tongue enough to make that moment of weakness fill him up. He turned his head over his shoulder and saw her moving towards him. She looked haggard, her coat hanging open on her frame and her cheeks blotchy. Her eyes met his and she tried to ignore the blood clinging to his skin and clothes. She didn't want to know how many people he had killed or why.
"Victoria, no," Billy spoke in a gruff voice.
"What are you doing here?" Homelander asked from her and she stood before him.
"Just let them go," she pleaded with him. "You know that this isn't the right thing to do. Ryan is scared…this isn't good for him."
"He's my son. I know what's good for him," he retorted to her.
"And killing Billy is? He wants to go with him…you need to let him go."
"I need to do what I have to for my son," Homelander said. "And if that means going through your brother then so be it."
He turned to face Billy again and Victoria saw him hold up his crowbar, prepared to fight Homelander. But as Homelander's eyes glowed red, Victoria said the only thing she could think of to make him stop.
"John, I'm pregnant!" she snapped at him.
It had the desired reaction. His eyes instantly stopped glowing and he turned around to face her, frown lines on his forehead and face scrunching up. Victoria didn't want to do this, but there was no other option. She had to do it because it was the only way to save her brother and Ryan. She watched as John shook his head slowly and Billy's face turned to one of anger and sorrow, a mixture of emotions he didn't know how to process. Victoria watched as Homelander moved towards her. He tilted his head, glare focused on her as though he expected her to squirm under it.
"You're pregnant?" he repeated to her and she could only nod her head once.
"Only a few weeks, but yes," Victoria said to him, voice shaking. "So let them go and I'll come back with you…I'll come back and I'll try…just let them go…please."
"Victoria, no," Billy said in a firm voice.
"It's fine," Victoria promised her brother, but she knew it wasn't. It was anything but fine. She looked to Homelander again and waited for him to say something, but he was silent. He was clearly too bemused by what he had just heard to think of anything coherent to say.
But then she realised what he was doing. He was listening for another heartbeat. And he heard it. He took a step back and his face continued contorting, a smile slowly forming on it as he let out a gasp. "You're pregnant," he said and moved towards her, his hand going to her stomach and she ignored the fact his gloves were covered in blood. He pressed his palm against it and he instantly knew that this was everything he wanted. He could have a child he could raise from birth. Would it be a boy or a girl?
"Let them go and I'll come with you," Victoria said to him and he looked her in the eye. She tried not to let herself feel anything but contempt for the man in front of her, but it was always difficult. It was always so difficult whenever he looked at her earnestly.
"You mean it?"
"Yes."
"No." Billy answered for her.
She slowly moved her hand to his wrist and lowered it from her stomach. Moving to her brother, she held onto his shoulders tightly. "You need to take Ryan and get away from here. Becca would want you to look after him. You do this for her."
"And leave you with that fucking monster?" Billy demanded.
"I made my choice to come back because I wanted Ryan and Becca to get out of here…and Becca…." Victoria could hardly look at the woman on the floor. She was gone. There was no bringing her back. "You need to do this for Becca. I'm here and I've made my choice."
"I can't lose you too," Billy whispered to her and she moved her arms around his neck, clinging tightly onto him before whispering into his ear.
"Do what you have to," she said, hoping he understood what she meant. He nodded against her shoulder as she pulled back and looked to him once more. She gave him a stern nod and squeezed his hand holding hers. She pulled away from him and he wanted to keep hold of her, but she was moving back towards Homelander who was offering her his own hand. Standing in between both of them, she looked to Homelander.
"Do you promise that you'll let them go?"
"I promise," he said and Victoria was about to ask him what his word actually meant.
But none of that mattered. She had no other option. Placing her hand into his, she felt the coldness of his gloves and it felt so familiar. How many times had she held his hand before? She let him pull her away from the scene, walking straight past Stormfront as she continued muttering something in German. Victoria looked over her shoulder once more to see Billy pick Ryan up, their eyes meeting once more. She tried not to cry as she looked away and realised that her decision had been made.
"We have a lot to discuss," Homelander said to her.
"I know."
"Come on…we're going home…and we need to get you to see a doctor…the best Vought can offer," Homelander said to her. "And everything will be as it should be."
Victoria wanted to scream. She wanted to tell him it wasn't possible. But she couldn't. She could only go along with what he wanted until she had a plan to escape. Because she swore that she'd never stop trying. She couldn't.
…
A/N: So Season 2 is done! I am planning on moving to season 3 if people want it, but with maybe some time in between it. As always, would love to know your thoughts - quite a long chapter here so pretty please let me know what you think/want to see moving forward!
