I called it: Midna wanted to watch all three movies in a row. Who can resist Lord of the Rings? We took breaks every now and then to stretch and get food, but for the most part we just stayed in bed. It definitely felt nice to be lazy, like old times.

So is this what you're going to do all day? Watch TV?!

I flinched. Fucking intrusive thoughts... Luckily it lined up with the scream of a Nazgûl so Midna was none the wiser. Unfortunately for me, I still had to wrestle with the feelings trailing behind that thought. It seeped into my mind like sticky black tar, clogging all my other thoughts and leaving me with that familiar sense of...

I sighed. I hated feeling this way. I hated everything about it but I brought it on myself. I was being lazy, despite Midna assuring me that we had nothing important to do. But there was always something to do, always. If I didn't find that something, then I wasn't looking hard enough.

And now in the middle of a fucking movie-fest, I had two choices; tell Midna I was getting upset at nothing, or keep silent and let her enjoy herself. The first option meant interrupting her fun and ruining the moment with my inconvenient and inconsiderate timing. The second meant going against her wishes that I talk it out with her.

To anyone else, this would not be so difficult. But for me, it was agonizing because no matter what, I was going to get yelled and lectured at about how STUPID I am to take this so seriously and literally. You have any idea how infuriating it is to second-guess your every decision? You have any idea how maddening it is to think everything you do is worthless and wrong?! You have any idea

"Are you okay?"

"Uh..." I rubbed my forehead. What do I tell her? That I got angry at a random thought? ... fuck it. "I had a random thought and it made me angry. I'm sorry, I didn't want to interrupt the movie."

Midna paused it and held my hand. "It's all right. Do you want to talk about it?"

"Not really, but I probably should."

"Only if you want to."

"I shouldn't have interrupted the movie."

Midna patted my hand and said, "I interrupted it. We can always resume later. For now, let's help you feel better."

I shook my head. "That's not fair to you. I... I need a lot of help, a lot more than you're qualified to give. No offense."

"None taken." Midna sat up and sputtered her lips. "You've had a rough life, huh?"

"Ugh, don't say that." I rolled onto my side, my back to her. "I didn't get beaten every other day or anything. I'm just being a baby over getting yelled at for things I did and didn't want to take responsibility for."

"Far be it from me to presume your home life but you're scared, Zach. Scared of someone doing physical harm to you or your possessions."

"Now I'm a coward..."

Midna squeezed my hand with both of hers. "I'm not calling you a coward."

"I-I know... but it's okay if you were, I've been called worse."

"I'm sorry your family didn't protect you from whoever has called you worse."

"Look, the point is that I'm getting an attitude just because someone raised their voice at me. And rightly so, I was being a little shit-bird. We should get back to the movie... or get back to work."

"Zach, please just breathe. You don't want to talk then I won't force you to. But breathe with me again." I nodded and did so, but then I jumped when I felt her hand on my cheek. "Sorry, didn't mean to startle you."

"It's okay," I said with a half-smile. "I've always been kinda jumpy."

Midna gently cupped my cheek, her thumb tracing a pattern just below my eyepatch. "Can I ask you a question?"

"Go ahead."

"You seem to feel a strong sense of shame from our little fight back in that dusty forest house, but you don't seem to harbor any ill will against me for what happened to you up on the mountain. My question is; why aren't you upset with me? It was my fault you're so injured."

"How is it your fault?" I asked. "You didn't make the cannon explode. It was your idea, sure, but no one could have predicted the cannon would be sabotaged." I then sighed, knowing what I was going to say next wasn't going to go well for me. "I'm not upset with you because there's nothing to be upset about with you. But I feel like your next question—assuming you have one—is going to be why I'm still upset about my part in that fight in the forest. The simple answer ties into my being a narcissist. It's okay for you to make mistakes because you're not me, but I have to be better. Perfect, never make mistakes, never fail."

"Ah."

I raised an eyebrow at her. "Ah? I was expecting... not that."

"Can I ask another question?"

"Sure."

"How often do you get these random anger-inducing thoughts?"

"... Very often. They just happen out of the blue. Sometimes they're... ugh, I hate saying this but sometimes they're triggered by something, anything at random."

"The same thing happens to me sometimes," she whispered. "But I don't get angry like you do. I get... sometimes I feel scared to death, other times I feel like crying my eyes out."

I nodded and rolled over to face her, regardless of whether I could see her or not. "That makes sense, you've been traumatized." It took a moment to register, but when it did I almost laughed. "You sly dog."

"Eee hee! You don't like to listen to other people," she said, "so I figured you would listen to yourself."

"Hey, I do like to listen to other people." I then sighed in defeat. "Just not as often as I should."

Midna snorted. "Trust me, I've never been good at that either. We're both a lot like Legolas and Gimli; stubborn, prideful, one of us is royalty, we come from two different worlds, and through battle and hardship we're bonding as comrades and friends."

"Except I'm taller," I blurted out. "Shit, I'm sorry, I just... saw the opportunity."

"Eee hee! No worries, I've grown to accept my current form. And you're right, you are taller—for now. You owe me a few jabs at our height difference when I'm back to normal."

"Deal. Once you're back to normal, I'll give you some jabs at our height difference."

"Hey, that's not what I meant!" Despite her protests, she was laughing too hard to be taken seriously.

"Too late, I've accepted the terms. It's legally binding and everything." Bwop! Her pillow smacked me upside the head, scaring the hell out of me even as I kept laughing. "Hey, that's low!"

We went back and forth for a while, tossing banter and witty remarks like they were tennis balls, and I forgot why I was even upset in the first place until I thought about it. Even then, I wasn't nearly as angry about it as I was before. It was really that easy? Just laugh and joke with a friend?

... damn it, Midna was right. When I thought it over myself, it sounded much better.

Once we settled down, I resumed the movie.


Midna admitted that maybe trying to help Zach was a bit more than she could chew. He was not kidding; he really did get upset at every little thing. Midna was certainly glad that it was getting easier to calm him down, and while she did worry about having to tend to him so much, hopefully he would be able to calm himself down properly as time went on.

Midna was a princess of her word. She said they were friends, so they were friends. She said she would help him, then she would help him. He helped her as well, for which she was very thankful. But the thing that gave her the most hope for him and by extension Midna herself was that bout of banter they just had.

That was probably the best laugh she had in a good long time. Not only was it fun, but it reminded her of Burak. Zach was far more brash but he and Burak shared a very similar sense of humor. If only she could see Midna now... If only her parents could see her...

She flinched and squeezed her eyes shut, wishing for the memory to go away. The pain had dulled but it still ached inside to think her parents were gone, mutated into horrible monsters.

Midna removed her hair clip and held it in her hands. "Zach... I'm sorry but I need to pause the movie."

"Sure," he said. "Is... um, stupid question but is everything okay?"

"No," she said. "It's not you. I... had a random thought and it made me sad. If it's all right with you, I'd like to talk about it."

"Of course." Zach sat up and carefully grasped Midna's hand.

Midna took a deep breath and let it out slow. "I was reminded of a dear friend. My closest friend, actually. I've known her ever since I was a child and... then I thought about my parents, the King and Queen. They... they turned into beasts right before my eyes, Zach. They're just like the monsters we've been fighting!"

"Holy fuck," Zach muttered. "I'm so sorry, Midna."

Midna's lip quivered. She traced her finger along the carvings in Burak's hairclip, her vision turning misty. "I miss them so much. They were just about to name me the new Queen of Twilight, but..." The rest of her sentence died in her throat. She whimpered and rubbed at her eyes, cursing herself for such a display.

Slowly, gently, Zach pulled Midna into his lap and enveloped her in a warm hug. He said nothing, but what could he say? He simply held her, stroking across her shoulders in a soothing gesture. A tiny part of Midna was indignant that she fit in his lap like a child, but the majority of her enjoyed it for the warmth and comfort. She buried her face in his chest and let out a ragged scream. Zach stiffened slightly—probably just out of surprise—but he kept gently rubbing her back.

Midna figured this would happen; she knew it was too soon to consider herself 'all better' from crying in the spring. Even so, this felt... perhaps it was a bit too much to say 'safe', but that was how it felt. She felt very safe in his arms. Safe and comforted.

It was this feeling of security that allowed her to cry in a most undignified way. She clutched his shirt for dear life, her tears smearing into the fabric. She cried, wept, sobbed, screamed, howled. And Zach simply let her. He still said nothing, he did not even shush her. He just stroked her back and let her vent it all out.

"I hate him," she muttered, her voice muffled by Zach's shirt. "I hate him so much. I've never hated anything more in my life." Without thinking, she pulled her fist back and slammed it against Zach's chest. "I hate him! I hate him! I hate him!"She kept punching with every sentence, repeating that mantra over and over until her fist and throat were sore. "I hate him... He took so much away from me, from my parents, from my people! And for what? For power? For control?" Midna's breathing sped up too fast for her to keep pace. Hyperventilating, she pulled away from Zach and her vision greyed out. The world turned upside down until Midna realized that she was falling over.

Zach caught her and gently lay her on the bed. "Breathe," he whispered. "Just breathe, like you told me." He grasped her hands in one of his, his other hand supporting Midna's head. "I was going to say it's okay, but it's not okay. It may never be okay. I have no idea what you're going through, but I'll do my best for you."

Midna focused on him. He had removed his eyepatch—most likely to ensure Midna was safely secure when he lay her down—and his eye still bore some redness, but there was something in his eye. Nothing tawdry like lust, but it was... love? No, that was not it. Just affection? Yes, affection and concern for her well-being. Whatever else he had on his mind, he put it aside for her.

"Zach... I'm sorry I hit you just now..."

"Why?" he asked, one eyebrow raised. "You needed to vent. Don't think you were abusing me or taking it out on me, because you weren't."

"I..." Midna wiped her cheeks and nodded at Zach's breathing suggestion. "Breathe... breathe..." It was so hard; her chest burned from so much crying and her heart ached from so many memories. "I-I can't..."

"Do you want some water?"

Bless his heart, he was trying. Unfortunately, that was a very poor choice of words. "I want to go home." Midna sat up and let her hands flop by her sides. Zach looked her in the eye, his expression bearing no ill will. "I just... I just want to go home."

Zach pulled her into another embrace, a hug that left the world behind. "I'll get you home," he whispered, his voice cracking. "I'll get you home, Midna. I promise."

Midna smiled and nuzzled her cheek against his. "I believe in you." She surprised herself; she had not meant to say that, but the more she thought about it, the more she realized she truly did believe in Zach. He was a good man and no amount of temper would convince Midna otherwise. "I'm glad you're my friend, Zach. I really mean it. I'm glad that of all the people I could be with, it's you."

"You wouldn't say that if you met Link," he muttered as he made himself comfy on the bed. "He was that 'pure-hearted hero' you spoke not-fondly of before."

"Blehhh I say." Midna settled in beside Zach as he grabbed his phone. "Maybe in my game I'd prefer him, but I have you and so I prefer you." She wiped her face and made herself comfortable. No more emotional talks! All she wanted for now was to finish the movie. It was the final battle of Return of the King! She needed to finish it so she could have closure on the Lord of the Rings affair. Then she would eventually move on to the rest of Zach's movies.

"Hey, Midna?"

"Hm?"

"I'm glad I'm here with you too. You're not the worst companion to have."

"Eee hee! Who could compete with me, the Twilight Princess?"

"No one," he said, but he quickly cleared his throat. "Anyway!"