Chapter 48

TW: Sexual coercion/ED behavior discussed in this chapter

Sansa Stark POV

I'm sitting in my history class when a girl from student council walks in to deliver Valentine's roses. They sell roses that people can buy every year to raise money for student council. I'm not paying attention until I hear my name called.

"Sansa Stark," the girl says. I just raise my hand and she walks over, placing the rose on my desk.

I open the note attached. "To my rose," it reads. "Happy Valentine's Day, my gorgeous girl. I can't wait for Sunday.- Ramsay." It's signed with a heart and a winky face.

A thought suddenly occurs to me: What if he wants to have sex on Valentine's Day? I'm definitely not ready for that. I'm hoping I can just give him oral, and that will be enough. Surely he doesn't expect me to go all the way yet, right? I can't think too much about that, my plan is to offer him alternatives and see where it goes. I'm more nervous than I was now.

Cersei Lannister POV

I'm sitting in my first class of the day, and it's the Friday before Valentine's Day. I normally don't care about this day, but Jaime always does a little something for me. He doesn't have to, and I'm not even sure why he does since I don't give him anything in return. Well, unless you count sex.

Dany walks into my classroom with flowers. Oh right, student council is delivering those today. As president, Dany always signs up for stuff like this. Instead of calling out a name, she walks right over to me and puts a rose on my desk. I give her a confused look, and she just shrugs. I open the note attached. "We'll make it through this- J."

Obviously it's from Jaime, Dany probably delivered it herself so she could keep other people from seeing it. I haven't told her I'm pregnant, and I also haven't told Euron. I'm thinking of not telling him at all. I feel like I can hide the pregnancy for the rest of the year until we graduate, but I definitely can't hide it from Dany.

When I go to sit down at lunch, only Sansa and Margaery are there. I don't really want to talk to them since I know Margaery hates me and I don't like her either, but I sit down anyway. I'm not going to let that bitch make me leave, and Sansa's just a baby. I can handle that. I don't know where Dany is, normally she tells me if she's eating lunch somewhere else and she usually invites me.

"Hey," I say, sitting down. Margaery just gives me a slight nod. "What are your Valentine's Day plans?" I ask Sansa. I'm curious what Ramsay has planned for them.

"Ramsay made reservations at the new Italian place up north," she responds. "It's supposed to be really good."

"Wow, that's expensive," I say to her. "Be careful, that's a lot of carbs, which won't do you any favors." I know it's mean, but Sansa needs to know where she stands and that we're not friends. She just looks down at her hard-boiled egg and sets it down. I actually feel bad.

"I have to go meet my math teacher to turn in a late assignment," Margaery says, getting up. "Bye Sansa." She walks away, and I know she didn't say goodbye to me on purpose.

Suddenly my phone dings, it's a text from Dany. *Can you come out to the senior lot? I want to talk to you.* It reads. I start to get up.

"Wait, Cersei?" Sansa asks me. I stop. "Can I ask you something?" I'm very confused as to what she would want to talk to me about.

"I really should go," I say. "Dany wants to talk to me." I don't want Sansa thinking we're friends.

"I'll be quick." Damn, she's serious.

"What is it?" I ask, sitting back down.

"I'm nervous for Sunday," she responds. "I've never been in a relationship on Valentine's Day."

"It's just like being in a relationship any other time of year, just more romantic," I respond, shrugging. It then occurs to me that Ramsay is probably her first relationship. "You'll be fine."

"I just," she continues. I can tell she's beating around the bush about something. "Ramsay got me a rose, and it sounded like he wants something to happen on Sunday. I don't know what he's going to expect of me." Oh, I get it now. I don't blame her for being scared, but that's what she gets for waiting so long to lose her virginity.

"Honestly," I say. I'm going to be brutally honest, because I know that's what she wants. Even if she doesn't want that, it's what she needs to hear. "Whatever it is, it's easier to just do it. Guys here are really only after one thing, and you can either do it or face the social repercussions from not doing it. It's up to you." I get up, because I don't want her to think she can actually confide in me.

I walk out to the senior lot and see Dany parked in a spot. She's sitting in the driver's seat, waiting for me. I walk over and get into the passenger's seat. "What's up?" I ask.

"What did the note on your rose mean?" She asks me, just getting right to it.

"What are you talking about?" I ask, playing dumb.

"Cersei, I know something's up. I don't know why Jaime would send you a rose on Valentine's Day, but you're lucky I delivered it and not someone else."

"He was just giving me some words of encouragement. I'm having a hard time."

"With what? I thought we told each other everything, Cers."

I take a deep breath. "You can't tell anyone, I'm very serious," I say. Dany sticks out her pinky and I lock mine with it. It may seem childish, but we've been doing pinky swears since we were six. We only break them out now for serious matters. She made me pinky swear when her dad had a nervous breakdown and when she first told me she had a crush on Jon Snow in 8th grade. I made her pinky swear when I told her I made out with my cousin Lancel the first time I got drunk in 6th grade. "I'm pregnant."

Dany gasps and covers her mouth. "For real?" She whispers. I just nod. "I'm assuming it's Euron's."

"Yep," I reply. "I don't know when I'm going to tell him, though, so I'd appreciate it if you didn't say anything."

"I won't, we pinky swore." There's a pause. "Are you going to keep it?"

"Yeah," I reply. "I don't know how, but I am. I can't imagine anything else, I know I want to be a mom someday."

Dany just gives me a hug. "Let me know if you need anything," she whispers into my ear. "Don't ever forget we're long lost sisters, nothing will change that." I know she means it, but I'll still never tell her it's Jaime's. That will be taken to both of our graves if I have anything to say about it.

Sansa Stark POV

It's Valentine's Day, and I'm getting ready for Ramsay to pick me up for dinner. I'm wearing the new black dress and pink scarf I got for my birthday, it makes me happy to know that it's already getting loose on me. I wish Daenerys was here to do my makeup, I don't really know what I'm doing. I hear a knock at the door, and I hear my mom open it and greet Ramsay. I didn't eat today except for the eggs my dad made and my mom forced me to eat.

I asked Cersei for her advice today because I knew she would tell me the truth, but I would have much rather asked Daenerys. If I had asked Margaery, she would have just gone off about how much she hates Ramsay and how I shouldn't be dating him. I really didn't want to hear her judgement. I know Cersei was right, but it was still tough to hear. I believe Ramsay cares about me, and I'm sure he'll be okay sticking to what we've already done.

I walk downstairs, and Ramsay is sitting on the couch talking to my mom. My dad had to go to a work thing tonight on Valentine's Day, which I know my mom is pissed about. "Hello love," Ramsay says, getting up and hugging me. "You look beautiful."

I just smile at him. "Bye mom," I say.

"Bye, Sweetie," she replies, giving me a kiss on the cheek. "Be home by 10:30."

When we get to the restaurant, it's beautifully decorated. We sit down and take a look at the menu. Cersei was right, everything is full of carbs. I keep hearing her voice in my head telling me to avoid them.

"I was thinking we could go back to my place after dinner," Ramsay says. "You've never been, and my parents left town today."

My heart starts pounding. "Okay, sounds good," I reply. I hope I don't sound as nervous as I am. "I just really need to be home by 10:30, or my mom will be really mad."

"Of course."

I just get a salad for dinner, but Ramsay orders me a piece of chocolate molten lava cake for dessert. It's sweet, but I say I'm full and get it packed up in a to-go box. I'll probably just give it to Arya. We finish up and drive to his house. When we get there, there's already a car in the driveway.

"Shit," Ramsay says. "I guess my dad and stepmom haven't left yet. I can just take you home if you like."

"No," I respond. "I'd love to meet them, if that's okay." Ramsay just gets out of the car. I follow him. His mom and stepdad are walking out of the house as we walk up the sidewalk.

"Dad," Ramsay says. "This is Sansa, my girlfriend."

"Lovely to meet you," Ramsay's dad says, shaking my hand. "I'm Roose, this is my wife. Sorry we have to rush out the door, we're heading out much later than we planned."

"Oh, that's okay," I respond. "It's so nice to meet you." They go out to the car and we go inside. Ramsay takes my to-go box and puts it in the fridge.

"Do you want to go watch TV in my room?" He asks me.

"Sure," I reply. I take off my scarf and hang it on a chair. We go into his room and he gets Netflix set up. He turns on a show called Glitch, which I've never seen. "Do you like this show?" I ask him.

"Yeah, it's okay," he responds. I don't know why he would turn it on if it's just okay, that seems weird. "Want to lay down? I'm full from all that we ate." I just smile and nod. I take off my shoes and we sit against the headboard on the bed. He puts his arm around me.

A few minutes into the show, he starts kissing my neck. We start making out, which is fine since the show was boring me anyway. He takes his shirt off, and unzips my dress. I take it off, and he takes off my bra. Everything is happening so quickly.

"Ramsay," I stop him. "Can we just stick to what we've done?"

"Of course," he responds. That's a much better response than I was expecting. I was prepared for him to argue with me.

He takes off his pants so he's in his underwear, and I use my hands for a bit. Then he takes off my underwear and starts to go down on me. I don't dislike it, but it's still weird to me. He comes up and kisses me. I'm expecting him to ask me to return the favor, but he doesn't.

"Sansa," Ramsay says. "I want to go all the way with you."

Shit. This is what I was afraid of. "Ramsay, I—" I start to say.

"I know you said you aren't ready, but what are we waiting for? There's no logical reason as to why we haven't."

"I'm still just a freshman," I respond. "I thought you were fine with waiting."

"Well, I don't see why we are. If you still want to wait, I don't think I can."

"Why not?"

"If you want this to be a real relationship, we need to go all the way. If not, we're basically just friends."

There's a long pause. I don't know what to say.

"You know, just go home," Ramsay continues. "I have nothing else to say."

"Let's do it," I abruptly say. "I'm ready." I'm definitely not, but I don't want him to dump me. I can't lose a guy over this, and both Cersei and Margaery tried to warn me. In a way I feel like I can't say no, because I signed up for this and people told me what I was in for.

As Ramsay is driving me home, I start to tear up. I'm not even sure why.

"What's wrong?" He asks me.

"I just didn't plan on that happening," I respond, wiping my eyes. My makeup can't be runny when I get home. "It wasn't what I expected."

"Well, now we're a real couple. It's a good thing." We pull up to my house, and he kisses me on the cheek. I get out of the car and walk inside with my to-go box. Ramsay made sure I took it home.

Everyone's in their rooms, asleep or chilling when I walk in. I know I said I was going to give my dessert to Arya, but I go in the kitchen and immediately start scarfing down my cake from the restaurant. I felt so hungry, it's almost like I couldn't help myself. After I scarf it down, I immediately feel guilty.

I feel my stomach hurting immediately, so I rush to the downstairs bathroom. If I don't make myself throw up, I'll probably throw up on my own. The guilt of what I just did and what I just ate will consume me if I don't throw up. I stick my fingers down my throat and the cake comes up after a couple tries. I wash my hands, go upstairs and wash my makeup off. I take off my dress and change into one of my dad's large T-shirts, for some reason I like sleeping in those. Luckily Arya is asleep. I lay in bed and cry myself quietly to sleep.

A/N: Sorry that this was a long one. This chapter was the toughest to write so far. I'm sorry if it was hard to read, it felt like it was fitting for the characters. Let me know what you thought.