CHAPTER 7 - Don't Take Parfaits From Strangers

The sight of Gintoki's limp frame falling to the ground seared itself into Hijikata's mind.

The smell of the hospital was a stark contrast to the sweet strawberry scent that always surrounded Gintoki.

It didn't suit him.

Sougo snored next to him, but the mask on his face didn't cover his eyes completely.

Hijikata watched as weary faces coming in and out of the room morphed into others.

Two, however, never left the room.

And he never went inside.

Seeing Sougo being flung around like a ragdoll almost made Hijikata forget the exploding pain between his legs.

Five weeks ago, Hijikata received a disturbing report from Yamazaki. A person from Ren Selene's entourage started behaving suspiciously – they were following Sakata Gintoki.

The whole entourage was veiled in a sort of arrogant and boisterous attitude, keeping to themselves as they strutted around their luxurious residence, with their noses pointed high in the air. It irked Hijikata to his bones, but he expected no less from noble rich boys, even if they came from a galaxy far away.

The exception being Ren himself. Hijikata didn't care to be his friend nor anything close to that, but Ren had already put up barriers that indicated what he'd expected from the Shinsengumi. It wasn't a matter of being ignored or looked down upon – in his world, it was as if they didn't exist at all. He looked like a predator on a prowl, relentlessly hunting down his hidden prey.

And when they did exist, feeble like flames of a candle about to be blown out, in the moments Hijikata's eyes met Ren's, he was overcome by an unsettling feeling that all of his thoughts and emotions were bared for him to judge. The silver of his eyes brought up memories of a person that plagued his mind more often than he wished for, and he wished to never think about that menace.

It was the reason why he sent Yamazaki to check up on the man instead of doing it himself.

So why was he in front of the Yorozuya office with excruciating pain in his… sensitive area after the kick from the Yato girl? Because even if they were a nuisance that he wanted to be free from, they were…

"What's your business with the Yorozuya Gin-chan, you tax thie... officers?"

Hijikata glanced at Gintoki who struggled to keep the enraged Yato subdued. His biceps strained against the weight of her flailing and Hijikata was again reminded of how much extraordinary strength this man possessed. He begrudgingly admired Gintoki as he pulled out a wad of cash from his wallet to pay for the broken table and held it out, only for it to disappear into thin air.

While those idiots fought for the money, Hijikata stared down at Sougo, exasperated by his behavior. "Can't you do your job properly for once?"

They had a stalker, possibly a spy on their hands, and Hijikata knew that he wouldn't feel at peace unless they warned Gintoki about it and resolved it. He only hoped the guy was acting on his own, and not on Ren's orders, or better yet, his superior's. It was enough that the silver-haired sweets freak kept popping up in his mind, and now this? He tried to keep his expression neutral to not show his worry on his face.

Worry?

"Hijikata-bastard, if I did my job properly, I would've made Vice-Commander already." Hijikata wanted to smack the bag of snacks Sougo had stolen out of his hands.

He wanted to get this whole thing over with. But before he could, Gintoki interrupted him. "We're in the middle of something here, so if uninvited guests could leave..."

Only then did Hijikata notice the person sitting on one of the couches. He was startled; he couldn't remember the last time he was surprised by someone's presence. Hijikata's senses flared up in alarm and immediately warned him that they were someone he should be careful of. No, not him. Gintoki.

His hand rose to touch Gintoki's arm, the muscle that flexed in a mesmerizing display of power only moments before, and he leaned forward in an unconscious effort to shield his body from the visitor's view. "Let's go outside", he whispered and tore himself from Gintoki's side, escaping outside to hide his embarrassment caused by his previous actions. It's my job to protect civilians, even useless bums like him.

They were finally out of earshot, but he wasn't about to discuss the ongoing investigation in the open. He wanted to get down to the bar, but those two idiots started bickering and then Gintoki crossed his arms, annoyance warping his face, and his biceps pushed his chest together –

Oh.

Gintoki was a samurai. An experienced fighter, the former member of the Joui Four. It was only natural that he had to acquire the physique that allowed him to accomplish such legendary feats. Hijikata was only admiring a fellow warrior, and not the way his pectoral muscles peeked out of the front of his shirt. His sloppy way of dress made Hijikata smile in ridicule. There's nothing likeable about this guy.

Hijikata's hand clenched around a metal object. He was surprised to find his lighter in his hand. He couldn't remember ever taking it out.

Downstairs, in the bar Gintoki's landlady ran, the trio huddled in a quiet corner to discuss further details. Hijikata was about to light up his cigarette but stopped after noticing Gintoki staring at him. What, does he mind second-hand smoke? Fussy. With a sigh, he put the box back in his pocket. He wearily prepared for breaking the news to Gintoki about his stalker.

At first, Gintoki took it well. He was behaving in his same idiotic, carefree way, though Hijikata sensed there was more to it than the moron had let on. But as they continued talking, Gintoki became more agitated, his mood shifting frighteningly fast, his breathing quickening. Hijikata fought the urge to lean across the table and put his hands on Gintoki's shoulders.

He tried calming him down, but it had the opposite effect. When he got up to leave, Gintoki pulled him down and once his world stopped spinning, he was staring back into his heated maroon eyes. Gintoki's full lips were twisted in rage and Hijikata couldn't bear to look away. His breath hitched and he was so close to him, close enough to -

"Tell me. Right now."

Huh!?

Hijikata's mind went into overdrive. Full lips!? Heated eyes!? No no no no… The bastard was impressive, Hijikata would give him that. He had never felt as close to death as when he fought against him to defend Kondou-san's honor on that fateful day on the rooftop, and since then he held a reluctant respect for him. The rush he felt back then engraved itself in his body so deeply that the sensation coursed through his blood every time his path crossed with the silver samurai.

And the more they clashed, the more he grew to appreciate the sight of his lax face by his side. He knew that, with Gintoki around, things would get better, no matter how dire they may seem.

Hijikata vowed never to forget what he'd done for the Shinsengumi. For him. Even if Gintoki claimed the debt had been repaid long time ago. He would always remember it. This has to be it. There was no other explanation; the reason he thought of Sakata Gintoki so much as of late was because he felt it was due time to repay the debt they owed.

The anxiety left his body with a sigh of relief and only after Gintoki relaxed his fingers from the tight grip on Hijikata's arm did he even realize he was being held onto. The warmth of Gintoki's palm remained seared into his upper arm, and he covered the invisible mark with his own fingers, holding onto the pulsing sensation.

He's strong.

"I owe ya one." Gintoki's voice contrasted the gloomy feeling of the bar.

And as his eyes followed Gintoki as he was leaving, he tried to suppress the worry he felt. He knew it wouldn't do anyone any good. He had to be strong as well, strong enough to protect Gintoki and everything that was important to him.

His heart faltered for a moment, only slightly so.

His cellphone rang for the seventh time that evening.

Hijikata's forehead sprouted yet another burst blood vein as he stared at the relentless buzzing device, hunched over a mountain of paperwork littering his desk. He was going to kill that sadist for good. Sougo somehow leaked his private phone number and now all he was getting were spam calls about sale deals for ketchup. That bastard. Why couldn't it have been mayonnaise?

He answered the call, already going on a fiery tirade. But after hearing who the person on the other side was, Hijikata wished it were the scammers. The laughter coming from the cellphone speaker tickled his ear in the worst possible way. Sitting on the floor, his leg jolted in surprise, and his knee hit the wooden table. A different kind of frustration washed over him.

Gintoki.

In his usual have-it-my-way-or-I'll-bother-you-to-death attitude, Gintoki listed several demands and Hijikata put up what would later prove to be a fruitless resistance. "Anything else, Your Majesty?" he asked mockingly, wanting to punch Gintoki through the cellphone screen.

"Yes. Keep calling me like that. It suits you."

The cellphone was almost obliterated as Hijikata slammed it against the desk, causing a heap of papers to slide off in a messy pile on the floor.

Gintoki's deep voice reverberated through his whole body, settling in a pool of heat in the lower part of his stomach. Goosebumps sprouted over his skin, and he stared in bewilderment at the phone in his hand, as if it would give him an answer as to why his body reacted the way it did.

His shaky hand raised the abused phone to his head, Gintoki's voice once again caressing his ear. It felt like he was right there in the room with him, and Hijikata was glad that wasn't the case. He didn't know if he could control his facial expressions. And his thunderous heart would surely betray his turbulent emotions.

"...Just what are you trying to pull." Hijikata stared at the ceiling in an attempt to calm down his erratic breathing. He was planning to sleep after this.

But just as Hijikata was getting started with gathering any useful information on Aya, Gintoki interrupted him. "Wait." The silence that followed was filled with muffled sounds of a fight and raised voices. Hijikata didn't worry about Gintoki being in danger, but he felt it was wrong to hang up in this situation.

"Talk to you later, servant."

"OI - "

The line went dead.

Hijikata stared at the dark screen, his face distorted in the cracked glass. The man staring back at him looked like he went through a near-death experience. Unwelcome images started forming in his head, those of Gintoki sitting on his desk, looking down on him, mocking him and calling him his servant, and Hijikata grabbing him and pushing him down on the table underneath him –

Hijikata banged his head against the wood and decided to forgo sleep that night. He had a new investigation to work on – Aya's. In revenge, he put Yamazaki on guard duty of the Shimura residence.

He wanted to kill Yamazaki for giving his number away as he pleased.

Though that sentiment grew weaker as he received a second call that night, that same ensnaring voice explaining an unfortunate meeting with the object of Hijikata's investigation. They talked long into the night, the topic of their conversation gradually steering away from Gintoki's stalker and onto the mundane. Shinpachi, Kagura, Kondou, Sougo, the Shinsengumi. And without him noticing it, Hijikata's lips rose in a contented smile as he lay on the floor, listening to Gintoki drone on and on, paperwork all but forgotten.

Hijikata was certain that Kondou spent more time at the Shimura residence than the Shinsengumi headquarters.

"Toshi, just for a little bit! I want to stay with Otae-san!" She doesn't want to stay with you, Kondou-san.

For the umpteenth time this month, he went to fetch their Commander and to get him to focus on anything else other than his unsuccessful flirting (stalking). However, this usually bothersome trip turned out to be a blessing in disguise.

As he held onto Kondou's collar, dragging him back to the base, he came face to face with Yorozuya's new client.

Aya.

They were clad in their armor once again, only this time a matching helmet covered their head. In daylight, Hijikata saw numerous scratches and dents littered over the metal plates, signs of aging and hard-won battles. Hijikata had heard from Gintoki that they wore it because they were allergic to the sun. Extremely so. Why are they out here then?

He spent the night and a good part of that morning investigating them. What he found wasn't alarming, but it also wasn't much. And that in and of itself was the alarming part.

"I saw you yesterday at the Yorozuya. You're their client, right?" he started probing. "What could you possibly need from a good-for-nothing guy like Gintoki?" He didn't forget the uneasy feeling he got when he first saw them, the one that moved his body closer to Gintoki's.

Aya said nothing for a moment, and Hijikata felt he was being observed. Strangely, for a moment he was reminded of Ren and his uncanny way of peering into people's souls. "And I noticed you were present at the office yesterday. I see. I did not mean to cause a misunderstanding."

"What are you talking about?" Hijikata frowned, pulling on Kondou's collar to keep him from going back to Shimura's sister.

"I am purely looking for a business transaction. Not one of a personal kind. I am not a threat to your relation with Sakata Gintoki. There is no need for a glass of water to be thrown in my face." Aya nodded in reassurance, a polite voice coming out of the armor with a metallic ring to it.

Hijikata was flabbergasted. He couldn't even begin to wrap his head around the words that just fell out of their mouth. "What… what relation? We're just… I mean… a threat?" Hijikata's heart started beating quicker as it caught on to what Aya meant before his brain did. He felt the uniform around his body constrict like a python around its prey and he got the sudden urge to dunk his head in ice cold water.

Gintoki's kids popped out from behind Aya.

"Hijikata-san! Thank you for taking the gorilla back, but please keep him on a tighter leash next time", Shinpachi looked at the squirming Kondou in disgust. "And don't worry about Aya-san, we were just marathoning dramas all morning. They're trying to get used to life on Earth." He turned to Aya: "But the one who throws water at you is the mother of the male lead, Aya-san, not the rival love interest. Hijikata-san and Gin-san don't have that kind of relationship."

Hijikata nervously started defending himself. "No, but why would you even think – I would never – why – "

Kagura slithered to his side, a smirk befitting that sadist's kin spread on her face. "Ooooh? Toshiii. Is there something you wanna share? Hmmmmm?" Her voice was raised in a falsetto, hand covering her giggling mouth.

"Share what!" he spit out, his voice too panicked for such a dumb topic. Is idiocy contagious? Is Aya now affected by these fools? Besides, there really was nothing to share. Was a late-night chat even worthy of mention? Or the fact that Sakata Gintoki occupied a place in his mind as stubbornly as Kondou-san coming here for another beating? Ridiculous.

"Shinpachi-kun, dramas truly are applicable to real life."

The Shimura kid nodded in amazement and exchanged a glance with the Yato girl. Oh, for the love of -

Kondou stopped trying to free himself and stared at Hijikata in bewilderment. "Toshi… So you're flirting with others! Let me do it as well!" While Hijikata respected his Commander a lot, he had to fight the strong urge to punt the pouting man into the police car and just drive off.

"Tch. We're leaving." Hijikata turned around, not interested in pursuing the conversation any further. I don't care about the investigation. It's fine. The only thing suspicious about all of this is their brains.

"I must say, both of you are very close to Sakata Gintoki", he heard Aya say to the other two. "Are you perhaps blood related?"

"As if I want to have any of his old man DNA!" Yato girl yelled, but even without looking at her, Hijikata knew that she was blushing in pride. "I already have enough on my plate with my idiot brother and father. What about you, Aya-chan? Do you have a family?"

The Shimura kid remained silent, waiting for the answer.

As was Hijikata, slowing down his pace to the car, with Kondou-san in tow. There was a long pause and Hijikata couldn't fight his curiosity any longer. He shoved his Commander in the car and turned around.

The helmet blocked Hijikata from seeing Aya's expression, and their voice was perfectly flat, revealing no emotion.

"Well, you could say that. We're not close."

Family, huh. At least he got something out of this fiasco.

Later in the day, as per their agreement, Hijikata waited for their practice to be over so that he could talk in private with Gintoki.

Really. I should just get him a phone instead of doing all this crap. He also needed to replace his broken screen, so it would all work out in the end.

As the sun set, Hijikata finally heard the door of the practice hall open. He looked up and saw the Yorozuya and Aya step out, all talking and laughing like they've been together for at least ten episodes. He was confused; didn't Gintoki ask him to look into Aya the night before? What changed?He did not, in any way, shape or form, feel a pang of some sort stab his heart.

Before calling out to the sweets addict, he put out his cigarette.

"Oi, Yorozuya."

His hands itched in a strange way, so he crossed them over his chest to keep them from doing something stupid again. Like touching Gintoki's arms.

And it didn't help that Aya brought up the drama mess from hours before. Although Gintoki appeared to be completely nonchalant, Hijikata was experiencing a nuclear meltdown. He knew what Aya was saying was complete nonsense, but he didn't want to stay for another minute to listen to it. Because if he did, he dreaded what those words would become.

He lit up a cigarette to calm down. To hell with second smoke and people who hate it.

Before he could flee the crime scene, Gintoki stopped him, his hand burning on his shoulder like the tip of his cigarette.

And he didn't… stop there. He took his hand, gripped it tight and ran, ran like the wind, for some stupid drama recording and Hijikata's hand pressed against Gintoki's chest, still firmly gripped in Gintoki's fingers.

It was all too much. Hijikata felt weird. The run took the breath out of his lungs, and he felt like there wasn't enough air as he stared at the back of Gintoki's unruly silver hair. It moved like a moonlit river, almost magically shining in the dark.

Gintoki's hair was always captivating.

He finally came to a halt and released Hijikata's hand. He still carried that aloof expression, as if his touch didn't scorch Hijikata's skin. "Right, so, what's up?"

Don't tell me… No, this jerk would definitely forget what happens off-page.

When Gintoki barely remembered their second call, Hijikata couldn't help feeling a bit hurt. The conversation they shared left Hijikata with a… pleasant sensation in his chest.

"Don't tell me you were offended, servant?"

It flipped a switch in Hijikata.

Hijikata was reminded of last night as suggestive images flooded his brain. Gintoki looked just as Hijikata had imagined, cocky and unsuspecting of what storm raged on inside his head. But it was different, seeing Gintoki in the flesh and right in front of him. Hijikata was fighting the urge to press Gintoki's body against the wall to get revenge for causing such internal turmoil, as he drew closer and only stopped when he heard his back hit the wall, with Gintoki looking uncharacteristically jittery. He derived deviant pleasure watching him squirm under his gaze, their lips only inches apart.

The heat once again settled in the pit of his stomach.

Even as the flickering lamp above them burst into a shower of sparks, even as they laughed together, even as they parted, it didn't leave his body.

It ignited a flame that would never die down.

Gintoki was a very skilled swordsman.

Hijikata watched his every move as he practiced for the dance, replacing Aya because of their injury. As Yamazaki reported, it was nothing serious, so in a deep, secret part of his soul, Hijikata thanked Aya for the opportunity to see Gintoki's capabilities up close.

He moved away from the crowd and stood by the side, looking at Gintoki's whirlwind performance. Sure, to an eye that looked at just the surface and focused on the dance part, it may have looked unpolished. But Hijikata knew that every motion Gintoki made belonged in a life and death sword fight, like a piece of a complex puzzle, executed with such power and precision that it looked effortless.

His eyes shifted to the side for a moment, and he saw Sougo, frozen with his eyes blown wide and his lips spread into an ominous smile. He probably wants to continue their shitty fight. He was not the only one emanating a murderous aura – the Yato pair that tagged along with Kagura had a similar hungry look in their eyes.

Hijikata turned his attention back to Gintoki and smiled at the blush coloring Gintoki's cheeks once the man had realized he wasn't alone. So, there was something that could make a shameless man like him embarrassed. Cu –

In a pandemonium that erupted, where for some reason everyone fought for the share of Yorozuya's reward money, Gintoki suddenly turned towards Hijikata, and he swiftly looked down to avoid meeting his eyes.

"And what exactly are you tax-thieves doing here? As if paying for my taxes isn't enough." Although the redness in his face was gone, Gintoki's voice betrayed his embarrassment and Hijikata felt sorry for him, even if he found his current state of distress endearing.

He did come here for a reason. Once they were alone, Gintoki started pouting, in an innocent kind of way, his skin heating in an alluring crimson. Hijikata was caught off guard, his eyes glued to Gintoki's exposed nape, but he collected himself and coughed to remind Gintoki of his presence.

Gintoki turned around.

Ha.

Hijikata had to look away. As he stared down the balcony at the water stage Gintoki would perform on, an image of his fiery hair, adorned by the setting sun, burned in his mind. Hijikata almost laughed out loud. All this time, he felt like he was on fire.

Ever since he met Sakata Gintoki.

Was it respect? Because Gintoki had beaten him in a duel and spared his life long ago? Or was it admiration, for the skills that he kept demonstrating? Maybe it was interest in the person himself, his unpredictable nature and unyielding spirit blinding everyone around him.

Gintoki leaned back on the wooden railing beside him, his eyes closed. Hijikata peered down at his scrunched-up face, the silver eyelashes on his cheeks gleaming golden in the sunlight. He felt the need to reassure him. "It looked good." And he truly believed so. He believed that spending time watching Gintoki fight an invisible opponent wouldn't be wasted.

A wave of relief washed over him when he saw Gintoki's mood improve, the lines on his forehead disappearing. Hijikata stifled a satisfied smile and reached in his uniform to take out a cigarette, but as he did so, Gintoki's hair once again caught his eye. Swaying in the wind, it looked alive, like a sea of fire glistening in the April air.

Gintoki's eyes met his.

Really, since when were those eyes filled with such a beautiful color?

Before he could stop himself, Hijikata's fingers lightly brushed against Gintoki's untamed locks. They were surprisingly soft, bouncing between his fingers and Hijikata felt like he just fulfilled one of his long time wishes. Gintoki's hair was always eye-catching, and Hijikata realized, with a start, that he adored it.

"Like an inferno."

He only grasped what he'd done when Gintoki got up. He immediately started spewing out excuses, with Gintoki helping him out while furiously blushing. It rattled Hijikata's heart madly. He almost fled the sunlit hall, and Gintoki's crimson stare, but he stopped himself. He didn't want to let his puzzling actions stop him from warning Gintoki about what had been bothering him for a good amount of the day.

Ren Selene.

Moreso, Ren and that stalkerish subordinate of his. Hijikata could hardly call him a spy – the behavior he had shown was more obsessive, more deranged than that of a mere spy. The way he had managed to blend into a crowd once he was done creeping around the Yorozuya office, according to Yamazaki's reports, made his skin crawl as if he'd been experiencing a nicotine withdrawal. Once he had decided to put a sword through his heart though, to hell with consequences, the stalking ceased.

It stopped after Gintoki had met the bastard.

Even three weeks later, the knowledge of them meeting made Hijikata's stomach churn. Maybe that was the reason why he had stayed up all night, chatting with Gintoki about anything and everything - because he wanted to wash away both his and Gintoki's anxiety away.

If only it were that simple.

Ren Selene. Heir apparent to the mighty Empire. Hijikata saw his influence first-hand, in the way he solved one issue after another, all while being portrayed as a helpful ally rather than a money-lending shark circling a bleeding prey. Hijikata knew that Princess Soyo and their administration had no other choice; with their aid, they've managed to narrowly avoid famine and perhaps another war over remaining resources. But no such gift came without a price.

What would Earth give, what would Edo abandon, in return?

Hijikata flinched when he felt a light flick on his forehead. As always, Gintoki's nonchalant demeanor calmed his nerves. Hijikata didn't stop a smile blooming on his face this time.

They even started bickering in what had become usual for them, and as a pleasant warmth spread in Hijikata's chest, the one person he didn't want Gintoki to encounter appeared.

It frosted over the feeble flame in his heart that had barely begun to sprout.

Ren stared at them, his silver eyes as piercing as ever. Hijikata could feel waves of animosity roll off Ren's body. Judging by the way Gintoki behaved, he didn't sense it, which meant that it was most likely directed towards Hijikata.

Gintoki continued talking, acting awfully familiar with the Imperial Prince, but Ren didn't ignore his existence like he did with the rest of them, the Shinsengumi and his own Imperial Knights. He watched him, with rapt attention, as if he wanted to soak in his every word and forever engrave them in his mind. Hijikata grew more and more agitated the longer the interaction between the two lasted. He felt like Gintoki was walking into an invisible trap, but he had no way of stopping it.

He said all there was to be said. The rest was up to Gintoki.

And Gintoki decided to accompany Ren.

Hijikata smothered an unbecoming part of him that felt disappointed and left before it reared its ugly head again.

Hijikata only meant to check if the stupid package was safe.

Not… not feel like this.

When the tent curtain opened, for a moment, the whole world came to a standstill. Hijikata froze, unable to move a single muscle. Golden light spilled into the moonlit night and suddenly Gintoki was there, part of both worlds and none at the same time, because how could someone like him belong anywhere on this mortal plane of existence?

As his thoughts slowed to a trickle, Gintoki stumbled forward and Hijikata caught him in his arms, his heart beating so frantically he felt like it would rip out of his chest. His mind once again started birthing coherent thoughts and his eyes locked with Gintoki's.

Pretty.

And as soon as the thought formed in his mind, their spellbound link came to an end, as Shinpachi's voice cut through the night.

Both kids were shocked by Gintoki's appearance. Being the ones closest to him, Hijikata expected nothing else. Even he was stunned out of his mind, and he was nothing to Gintoki. But what he didn't expect was his heart constricting when he saw Gintoki gently pat their heads, in a paternal, calming way only caring family would. It was easy to forget that underneath his dead-fish-eyed look, Gintoki was a loving and self-sacrificing idiot. And in Hijikata's eyes, it made him shine brighter than any of the jewels adorning his body.

Hijikata was still out of sorts, barely noticing that Aya appeared and left. He clutched the box that was the cause of his suffering and held onto it for dear life. He almost didn't want to let go when Gintoki came to collect it. Though it soon left Gintoki's hands as well, when Shinpachi took the package, and gave Hijikata a long stare with a knowing smile on his face. Kagura just giggled. Hijikata knew they were laughing at him. It seemed that Aya's drama ramblings stayed in their minds for far too long.

These brats.

Once alone with Gintoki, Hijikata couldn't help but focus only on him. The moon, the night, the fireflies-filled pond, it all melted away. There was only Gintoki, illuminated in a brilliant silver, pulling him forward like they were tied by an invisible thread. As he got closer, his heart beat harder, igniting his blood. His arms still burned with the touch of Gintoki's waist, and he wanted to feel that weight again, brush his fingers once more against the soft skin of his back. He didn't know where to lay his gaze, whether on Gintoki's glittered hands, or his enticing neckline, his dazzling cheeks or his enchanting ruby eyes. He settled for his hair, carefully picking up a crystal resting in his beautiful locks.

"It's pretty", he whispered in Gintoki's ear. And to what exactly he was referring to, Hijikata couldn't tell. He didn't even try to fight thoughts that he struggled against all those times before. His resistance crumbled under Gintoki's intense gaze, reminding him that he was no illusion Hijikata's exhausted mind conjured up.

Was he to be a victim of Gintoki's every whim for evermore? What an accursedly sweet fate that was.

Hijikata didn't fight Gintoki's fingers climbing up his neck, making him shiver in anticipation. He let Gintoki pull his head closer. He circled Gintoki's waist, battling the primal urge to do more. The strawberry scent he once abhorred now felt like an oasis to a man in a desert, savoring and lifesaving. He wanted to drown in it. As he gazed into Gintoki's eyes, he finally realized that, more than anything else in the world, he wanted to kiss him.

So much so.

And he delighted in the fact that Gintoki wanted to do the same.

But they never got the chance.

"Vice-Commander, come in." The radio on his shoulder severed their heated embrace. As much as he hated it, Hijikata pushed down his feelings, and left without so much as a glance back, because he didn't trust himself enough not to stay if he did.

Ren did not shed his cold-blooded persona even in front of Princess Soyo nor other Edo dignitaries. They all sat in a heavy silence in their lavish stands, intimidated by his upright frame gazing at the stage. His menacing aura shut down any weak attempt at small talk. It seemed as though any glimpse into his true thoughts would only be possible in Gintoki's presence.

And that bothered Hijikata to no end.

As he and Sougo, along with some Shinsengumi members and Imperial Knights, accompanied Ren to wherever he needed to be, the servants that crossed their path gawked at Ren. Their eyes full of admiration soon turned fearful, their heads bowed as they scurried out of sight. Perhaps they also felt their souls were read at a mere glance. Hijikata almost felt sorry for them. In this moment, however, he mostly felt sorry for himself.

It's Gintoki's turn after this. Tch.

And here they were, in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by darkness.

"Hijikata-bastard, get your head out of mayoland and focus."

"Huh?" Hijikata barely let out as he caught the sight of a blade headed straight for his stomach. He swiftly parried the strike with his own blade, the clang of metal meeting metal ringing out in the night. "Protect the Imperial Prince!"

The rest of the force immediately mobilized around Ren, their weapons drawn and ready. Hijikata still held the attacker back, hardly registering a heat spreading around his chest. The assailant's blade gleamed in the dark, scraping against Hijikata's sword. He tried to make out any of their features under the dark hood that covered their whole body.

"You bastard!" Hijikata shouted at Sougo, more irritated than surprised at the turn of events. He kicked the attacker back and caught his breath before once again parrying a swing from the side.

Sougo sneered as he watched Hijikata struggle with his sword loosely pointing towards the ground. "I did warn you. You should be grateful, Vice-Commander."

Grateful, my ass!

The assailant wasn't nearly as skilled as Hijikata and soon buckled under the power of his blows. Instead of continuing their futile assassination attempt, they dropped the blade and fled into the forest. "Oi!" Hijikata shouted and ran after them but was stopped by a hand on his shoulder. He suppressed the instinct to strike back.

"Don't."

Ren didn't bother looking at him as he stared at the spot where the attacker disappeared.

Hijikata furiously pushed his hand off his shoulder. "What, don't do my job?" he spit out. "Go back with your Imperial Knights, we'll handle this. Shinsengumi, head - "

"No." Ren cut him off, turning to his Imperial Knights. "Move." He chillingly ordered and they obeyed at once, their white uniforms swallowed by the darkness. "You'll go back with us. You need medical attention", he flatly stated and pointed at Hijikata's chest. Hijikata glanced down, only to see a bloom of red on his usually pristinely white cravat. Shit.

"It's fine", he grumbled, a fine sheen of sweat gracing his skin. "Sougo, go back with him, the rest of you – " Ugh. Hijikata scowled at the wetness on the front of his uniform.

"Hijikata-saaan", Sougo drawled, "just stay here and die. I want to see danna's performance." He left behind both Hijikata and Ren, swaggering back to the stands with his hands in his pockets.

The rest of the Shinsengumi anxiously eyed Hijikata and the wound on his chest. "Vice-Commander…"

Ren and Hijikata exchanged a glance, challenging the other to move first. "Fine", Hijikata conceded. "Bag the blade. We'll take is as evidence", he pointed at the ground where the metal of the assassin's sword glinted in the moonlight and a Shinsengumi officer obeyed his order. What kind of dumbass would leave their weapon behind?

The walk back to the stands felt like a race.

When Gintoki stepped on the stage, the clamoring stands went silent.

It wasn't the silence of a crowd waiting to be entertained. It was the stillness of one that held its breath, not daring to disturb the transcendent realm of moonlight incarnate.

Gintoki shone brighter than the moon, overshadowing its blue light as he sliced across the water. The night was starless, for all the stars had fallen, in the presence of such allure, beneath his feet.

And the way he moved? Hijikata had never seen such elegance. The sword in his hand looked like it had a life of its own; while Hijikata could see a remnant of Gintoki's dance practice, the power and precision with which he wielded the blade felt alien. The one on the other side of its edge would surely perish and be thankful for being witness to its virtuosity.

Hijikata felt the need to look away, to break the spell he was put under. He glanced to the side and saw Sougo, standing at attention behind Ren, equally as entranced as he himself was. He stood perfectly still, only his eyes moving as they ardently followed Gintoki's sword dance. Both Edo and Imperial officials mimicked his stance, some leaning forward in their seats to be closer to the stage, among them Princess Soyo herself.

Ren's face cracked into a gracious smile as he stared on in wonder. Hijikata wasn't surprised that his glacial countenance melted under Gintoki's sword strokes, each one painting an enthralling picture. He didn't even want to imagine what his own face looked like. But only one word came to mind as he gazed back at the cause of his anguish.

Beautiful.

Hijikata was no poet, nor did he read any poetry.

But he now understood why it existed.

Because how could one live with these emotions tearing at their heart, without dying from their fierceness? The words put on paper, thrown out into the void, although flimsy in comparison to the embodiment of the divine, gave respite to poor souls afflicted by the sublime inferno.

And Hijikata felt like he was in the deepest parts of hell.

For Gintoki was dancing in a world he had no part of.

Hijikata's bandaged wound throbbed dully.

He recalled a brief moment, almost a month ago, when he chanced upon a report of a person carrying an intricate machine, as well as a weapon. Those things would've landed the perpetrator in jail immediately. However, they were tested and deemed not dangerous, the reason being they were going to be used for a celebratory performance.

That report carried Aya's name on it.

After what had happened yesterday, Hijikata pulled out the report archived at the Shinsengumi HQ, looking over it time and time again throughout the night. It still carried the same information, but this time its importance grew tremendously. He wanted to confiscate the suspicious items and have them checked again, but on what grounds? Information from a noncredible source, which had yet to be proven? And would the test even show something different this time around?

Before interrogating Aya, he wanted to stop by the Yorozuya's, the ones that spent the most time with the person in question.

Seeing Gintoki in the daylight felt different, and relief washed over him when he realized that he went back to his normal, mundane self. He could attribute his strange behavior towards him as fascination and nothing more.

Gintoki looked unusually on edge as he clumsily dove headfirst into him, and Hijikata had to suppress a grunt of pain at the impact.

As he sat across the Yorozuya trio, breaking the news of last night's attack, he could see how pained they were by the implication of Aya's involvement.

Especially Gintoki. He was concerned about Aya and Ren, people who were supposed enemies, at the same time. He's always like this.

Hijikata got up with a bad taste in his mouth.

"Wait."

As he began his trudge back to the Shinsengumi HQ, he was surprised to find that Gintoki had followed him outside. Not only that, but his tender fingers combed through his hair, whisking away his weariness, accompanied by a languid smile that set his heart ablaze. Gintoki continued talking and Hijikata felt like he was underwater, barely taking in his muffled words. His heart raced as all his feeble attempts to think about anything else caved under the vision of Gintoki's messy head of hair and a blinding grin on his face, as he leaned across the wooden railing with the sunlight trickling from behind.

Gintoki didn't return to his mundane looks. Because even if all the glamour had been stripped away, underneath it was the same Gintoki, and what made him shine so beautifully couldn't possibly be as worthless as diamonds.

It was the silver of his soul.

All this time. He was so, so blind.

It wasn't mere curiosity, nor was it just admiration. Such feelings could not compare to the storm that raged inside his heart. And with a crushing defeat, he had to admit that it could only be described as one emotion.

Hijikata's chest ached, painfully so.

Ren being surrounded by joyful festivalgoers painted a strange picture.

Hijikata would've never labelled him as a festival enthusiast, but just two days ago he tirelessly worked on relocating the fair and filling it with marvelous sights that people flocked to. Hijikata would've been almost impressed with his passion for urban design if he wasn't so uncomfortable around him.

The man in question was frantic, nothing like his usual impassive self, as he was searching for something in the crowd. And since their job was to protect him, Hijikata, Sougo and Kondou followed after him.

At least until they came across the first food stall.

"Hijikata-san – mm - hold this for me", Sougo mumbled, his mouth full of food. "Mm - and this – mm – this as well", he continued putting dry squid and takoyaki in Hijikata's hands. "Okay, let's go after Hijikata-san pays for all of these."

"Why do I have to pay!?" Hijikata struggled to get the wallet out of his pocket. "Seriously…" Tch. May as well eat it.

But before he could take a single bite, Sougo swiped the food from his hands. "Stick to your dog food, Hijikata-san. This shouldn't be wasted on the likes of you."

Oiiiii!

"Now, now, Toshi. We might as well enjoy the festival since we're here!" Why the hell would I enjoy it with you!? And I know you're waiting for Shimura's sister to show up, Kondou-san. Why else would he had spent all that useless time in front of the mirror, practicing gorilla mating calls or whatever they used to communicate.

"Hijikata-san, we lost the Imperial Prince because of you. Commit seppuku."

"You commit double seppuku!"

"You commit – "

But before they could get to a triple seppuku, they stumbled onto Ren amidst a crowd of curious onlookers.

And the Yorozuya.

Hijikata could not believe his luck. Or misfortune.

Following Ren around and making sure that nothing happened to him was easy enough. If he had to suffer a few injuries for it, Hijikata could brush it off, as he always did. Following Ren and Gintoki around the festival made him feel like he had been stabbed a hundred times and each wound bled him dry.

"Jealousy is unattractive, Hijikata-san. And V-shaped bangs. And Hijikata-san."

Sougo was always an expert at pushing his buttons, but this time he really hit a nerve. Hijikata was supposed to be at Ren's residence, staying quiet and vigilant and acting out his duty as his guard. Not look at Gintoki having the time of his life while being gawked at by everyone around him like he was an exhibition piece.

He didn't deserve that.

Sougo smirked devilishly when Hijikata whipped around and tried to swipe back the food he paid for. And utterly failed.

"Toshi", the Yato girl called out to him. "You have to try harder. We're a package deal." It made him glance up at the Yorozuya, his head stuck in Sougo's headlock. Gintoki looked back at him in confusion.

Hijikata wasn't sure if Kagura and Shinpachi were trying to help him out all this time, or if they were just messing with him.

Either way, he didn't want to be helped.

Even as they were trekking up the hill path, lit with the lanterns swaying in the night, both Sougo and Kagura continued pestering him. He was thankful to Kondou for bothering Shinpachi so that he doesn't join in, but he couldn't help but feel sorry for the kid as well.

They had all long forgotten why the group ended up together.

"Why would I be jealous?" Hijikata relented. He hoped the other two would start fighting each other, the way they usually did, and he would stealthily slip away. The question, however, fell on deaf ears.

"I have to make sure Gin-chan's well fed. He can't survive alone, he gets lonely easily, and Ren is quite the catch. Free food for life? Sign me – ahem – him up!"

"It's not about material things and food, dumbass", Sougo said, exasperated. "Danna's all about looks. And Hijikata-bastard loses hands-down."

"Gin-chan cares more about food! He can date ugly people."

"It's obviously looks. Just feed him strawberry milk and he'll survive."

So I lose in both categories?

The explosion of fireworks drowned out their voices and Hijikata stared straight ahead at Gintoki's back.

Do I want something more?

And... does Gintoki?

Before he could find the answers to those questions, Gintoki suddenly sped up towards a figure on the top of the hill.

Sakamoto Tatsuma. One of the Joui Four legends.

Hijikata was taken aback by his presence, here of all places, but his surprise was brief.

Gintoki hugged him, threw himself at him, in an intimate way, and it looked like a picture-perfect moment of a couple in love. Fireworks burst around them, coloring their world in pretty shades, as Hijikata watched from the side, his own bleak.

He wanted to laugh. Laugh away the pain burning his scarred flesh; endure the misery piercing his heart. Because he couldn't allow himself to feel, for what did the two of them even have?

Forget it.

He pulled a cigarette pack from his pocket.

Forget everything.

He held the unlit cigarette between his fingers.

Forget him –

"Gintoki!"

Hijikata was tired.

Ever since Kondou got wind of a large-scale Amanto event being organized in the middle of Edo, he was tired. Ever since the Shinsengumi got the command from the Chief of the Police, Imai Nobume, that they were to guard an important Amanto envoy, he was tired. Ever since Ren Selene showed up on Earth, and they followed him almost everywhere, he was…

Tired.

Between chasing down anyone who looked at Ren wrong to investigating the man's own people, he was torn in so many directions that he barely pushed his exhausted body forward. Sougo was his usual useless self and even his workload by some misfortune got transferred to him. Keeping track of how many Amanto crossed their borders and what they might've smuggled in was an arduous undertaking, but Hijikata managed to make his mind focus on the task at hand.

It helped shift his thoughts from a problem that had been ailing him for the last two days. The problem being a tall, silver, and handsome -

Hijikata felt like punching his face in as his mind purred like a waking beast, ready to pounce on some dubious thoughts. Smuggling… we already had over five hundred confiscations, he distracted himself.

Hijikata wearily rubbed his forehead, wiping the headache away. Was the cause of his exhaustion really his job? Or did something else keep him awake all these nights, jolting him from feverish dreams as he stared down his lap in disbelief and shame, panting the rousing fantasy away?

Damn it.

Even now, he was diligently patrolling the Edo streets. As he walked past people going on about their day, a lit cigarette hanging from his mouth, his legs traitorously pulled him towards a certain office, located in a rowdy district of Kabuki.

He's fine now. He should be there.

Just as he thought of that, Sakata Gintoki, as if to spite him, proved him wrong.

"You said you like parfaits? Well, we have plenty of those! Vanilla, chocolate – "

"Strawberry?"

"Strawberry! All you can eat, free of charge! The best of the best in the whole Milky Way!"

"This sounds too good to be true…"

"It's a special promotion week!"

"Hm…" Gintoki pondered for a moment. "Alright – "

Hijikata's blade swished through the air and landed on the Amanto seller's throat. The smoke rising from his cigarette and a threatening grin reinforced his nickname of a Demon Vice-Commander. "Anything I can help you with?"

The seller went pale, his beady eyes darting between Gintoki and Hijikata. "No… No, thank you, officer."

"Are you sure?" His voice was dripping in sweet venom. He gripped his sword tighter, the metal glinting in the sun.

The man it was pointed at nervously glanced down at it, skittishly putting his hands up. "I… I just wanted to make him the face of our shop! I'm sorry!" he confessed.

"Why are you sorry? Did you do something you should feel sorry for?"

Half an hour later, Hijikata and Gintoki looked at a police car with the seller-turned-trafficker driving away.

Hijikata was pissed off. He whirled around and grabbed the sugar-rotten-brain dumbass by his collar. "Are you a kid!? You're not supposed to take candy from strangers!" What would've happened if I wasn't here?

"And that's exactly why I did it - I'm not a kid. I can take care of myself." His stupid face was relaxed, and he was already picking his nose like he wasn't almost kidnapped. Hijikata let go of him, still fuming, and held his forehead to stop an oncoming headache.

You idiot.

"I'll buy you the damned parfait."

Gintoki stared at him in shock, but as soon as their eyes met, he glanced away. "Why should I look at you when I eat?"

"…Wouldn't you like to take money from… a tax thief?" …What am I saying.

"Ha." Gintoki puffed out in a chuckle, hiding his smile behind his lithe fingers. "Sure."

The whole way to the pastry shop, that Gintoki swore was the best in all of Edo, people around them stumbled over themselves. There wasn't a problem with the road nor invisible barriers people in horror movies constantly tripped over. They were all staring and blushing at the person next to Hijikata who was blissfully unaware of the chaos he was causing.

Gintoki was glowing. And it wasn't an exaggeration; the smile on his face dimmed the sun and his hair shone, magically swaying as he walked.

"We're here."

The pastry shop was the last place he would've expected to see Gintoki. It was pink, frilly, and dainty. Instead of traditional chairs, gaudy love seats and armchairs littered the café. Servers wore formal clothes like suits and dresses, and guests visiting the establishment weren't far behind.

Above all else, it was brimming with heart-eyed, love-struck couples.

Hijikata felt as if they stood out like a sore thumb.

Gintoki didn't seem to notice. "There's nothing with mayo on the menu, just to be clear", he smugly said looking over the gold-embellished paper, as if he wasn't going to order the same thing as always.

That's the least of my worries. He peered across the petite round table at Gintoki, scanning his face for any sign of illness. "What did they say at the hospital?" The question that had been burning at the back of his mind had finally gotten out.

His fingers itched for a cigarette.

"Hm. It was nothing serious. I stopped listening after she said something about my sugar." Gintoki's eyes lit up when a dapper waiter brought an extravagant parfait to their table, filled with strawberries and cream. "See, the service here is top notch! I haven't even ordered, and they already know what I want."

The server politely smiled at him. "It's on the house. Please enjoy yourself."

Hijikata looked around when he noticed the café go silent. All couples' eyes were glued to their table. Ogle your own dates! He made sure to give each of them his deadliest stare and they all flinched when caught, hastily turning away. He looked up at the waiter. "Black coffee for me."

The waiter tsked at him and left. A vein popped on Hijikata's forehead, but he breathed out to suppress the urge to retaliate and turned to Gintoki. "You look good."

Gintoki's spoon loudly clanked against the glass. "Uh, thanks. You're handsome as well."

Huh?

"No, I meant, you don't look ill."

"Oh. Right."

Gintoki stared down at his half-empty parfait glass like he wanted to drown in it. All Hijikata could see was the tips of his ears, reddened in a precious shade of rosy pink.

Did something change with Gintoki over the last two days he hadn't seen him? Hijikata couldn't quite explain it, but it reminded him of the magical effect he had over everyone on that unforgettable night. It was as if a layer had been peeled back to reveal something more. Something that made him stay in here, out of place, just to get a chance to be with him for a moment longer.

The waiter brought Hijikata's coffee to their table, but he had no desire to drink it.

"You got them really worried, you know. Your kids." He recalled the night Gintoki had fainted and how their faces paled in panic as he played with the cup of cold coffee. The whole ride to the hospital, Sakamoto and he had to work together to calm them down. It was such a rare occurrence, seeing them in that state, but it reminded him that they were just children who sometimes had to bear too heavy a burden on their frail shoulders.

"I keep messing up, don't I?"

Hijikata looked up, woken from his distraction by the self-deprecation in Gintoki's voice. It tore at his heart, because he knew that behind that pained smile hid a whole world of suffering. "Knowing you, you're capable of far worse. You're not there yet, don't worry."

He was concerned he might've gone overboard, but Gintoki's chuckle eased his worries. "You're right", Gintoki mirthfully said as he rested his head on his interlaced fingers, staring at him with a fond glint in his eyes. "I guess I'm lucky I have so many people who worry about me. Right, Toushirou?"

"Exactly – "

Hijikata was glad his coffee was cold. Otherwise, he would've burned his hands with the liquid when hit the table with his knee. "Hm", Gintoki murmured as he leaned forward, his face dangerously close to his. "So that was the sound I heard over the phone, all those nights ago. You're awfully sensitive, aren't you, Hijikata-san?"

You want to do this?

"I remember a certain someone going all weak in the knees when called pretty", Hijikata snidely retaliated. "How he pushed his body into someone else, all eager. And how he just couldn't resist going for a – "

"And who was the one who called me pretty?"

Hijikata held back from responding when he realized what his words were doing to Gintoki. His face was flushed, impossibly pink, and his lush eyelashes wet with unshed tears as he bit into the softness of his lower lip.

"I'm sorry – "

"Don't worry, it didn't mean anything to me as well." Gintoki straightened up in his armchair, his previously crestfallen face disappearing like a mirage as he laughed. "It was all just a spur of the moment thing, right?"

It wasn't.

"Right."

It was better this way. Hijikata could handle pining for as long as his heart stubbornly held onto these feelings. What he couldn't bear to go through once more, was losing what the twin heart carried in its precious embrace.

His love.

"Oi, what time is it? Shit, I forgot I was meeting Tatsuma tonight." Gintoki quickly got out of his seat and slammed a thousand-yen bill on the table. "The next one's on you, got it?"

And he was gone. Just like he appeared, that was how he disappeared. Like a whirlwind.

Hijikata stared at the empty chair on the other side of the table and drank what was left of his coffee at the bottom of the cup.

It was bitter.


Thank you for reading! :D