Hello everyone! I have been planning this chapter (and part two) ever since the finale of Supernatural, and I'm super excited to finally get this out to you all! This chapter is by far the longest chapter I've ever written, so I've split it up into two parts. For context, this chapter details with the relationship Carter has with her boyfriend Jackson, and also shows what the rest of her life looks like after the finale. If you don't remember Jackson, you can look back at chapter 16: "The Darkness in her Closet," where he was introduced, but it is not necessary to do so.
I hope you all enjoy!
This part spans from season 10-15
Ages:
Carter: 22-27
Sam: 31-36
Dean: 35-40
Warnings: cursing
Disclaimer: I do not own Supernatural!
When they first met, neither one was looking for a relationship. A one-night stand, that's all that was expected. Fast and dirty, it was what they had done in the past and that's what they wanted. Neither could have possibly expected everything that was to come.
Carter was working the bar that night. During the week, she taught high school kids mythology, but that wasn't enough to pay the bills. On the weekends, she waitressed at the local bar late into the night. The bar wasn't like one of the shitholes she frequented growing up, but it wasn't fine dining either.
It was a Saturday night, and the place was packed. A local band blasted music from a corner of the room, and a makeshift dance floor had formed in front of it. A drunk couple swayed to the music, crashing into each other and other patrons as they laughed. On the other side of the bar, a rowdy bachelor party took up a corner booth and downed drinks as fast as they arrived.
It wasn't until the group was thoroughly plastered and loud did Carter notice him. Throughout the night, he sat at the end of the booth and tossed cheesy pick up lines at her, for which the rest of the bachelor group encouraged. "Come on, he's a catch! Look, he even uses a fucking coaster, ain't you girls all about that?" One of the boys pointed out and the rest backed him up. When Carter laughed it off, they all got defensive before they started ragging on him for not being able to hook up with anyone.
Carter shrugged them all off as she continued her night. It wasn't the first time drunk men hit on her, and wouldn't be the last. It was something she had gotten used to when working at a bar, though honestly she had been dealing with it most of her life.
An hour later, the bar slowed down enough for Carter to get back behind the counter again. She was wiping away spilled juice when his voice slipped out in front of her: "Look, I have to be honest."
Her head snapped up as she was shocked to see who it was. The whole night, their table had taken to shouting whenever they needed her, rather than coming to the bar themselves. To see him standing in front of her was not what she expected.
"My friends bet me fifty bucks you wouldn't go out with me. Now, if you smile and laugh and maybe blush like I've impressed you and then give me your number, I'll split the money with you. We leave tonight together, I'll give you all of it," he spelled out with as much of a serious face as he could muster in his buzzed state.
Carter took a moment to drink him in before responding. He was cute, no doubt about it. His brown hair flopped and curled about his head, and he was quite buff. His button up shirt fit snugly around his chest and arms, and he was easy on the eyes. Carter quickly glanced at his table to see six pairs of glazed over eyes watching her back.
This could be fun, she thought, what do I have to lose? She flicked her ponytail over her shoulder and smiled and giggled like a schoolgirl to really sell her part. "You got a deal." She leaned on the counter and took out a pen, scribbling her number on a nearby napkin. "I'm off in an hour."
He nodded his head several times, a smile plastered on his face, surprised it even worked. He grabbed the napkin and practically sprinted back to his table, his arms raised in victory as the rest of the boys hollered.
That night was the first night they slept together. Neither one expected to actually do it, which somehow made it all the better. As they were leaving, they finally exchanged names. Jackson. His name was Jackson. Carter pocketed the name but never expected to see him again. Jackson didn't expect to see her either, but a week later they did it again. A happenstance meeting at the bar, a couple drinks at the end of the night, and a trip to the backseat of Carter's car. They said goodbye five times, thinking they'd never see each other each time, before they decided to stop saying goodbye.
After sleeping together off and on for weeks, they decided to make a real go of their relationship. Their first date was at an Italian restaurant, their second at the movies. And before they knew it, they had been dating seriously for six months. Three months in, Jackson met Sam and Dean in a very unceremonious way, but they made up for it in the weeks following. Jackson and Sam found that they got along well, and they could talk late into the night on almost any topic. Dean, on the other hand, took some warming up to. But once he found out Jackson could drink as much as him, and liked shooting guns the same, they hit it off quickly.
In a single moment, Jackson met Sam and Dean, Carter's entire world. On her side of the family, there was no one else important left to meet. Carter didn't have parents anymore, no other brothers or sisters or uncles or aunts or cousins. Technically she had a grandma left, if she was even still alive, but she hadn't talked to her since the first time she met her. For Jackson, it was easy.
For Carter, it was definitely not.
Jackson was the baby of five kids, and his parents were still very much alive and happy. Three of his siblings were already even married with kids. He had grandparents, cousins, aunts, uncles, family friends, a whole slew of people in his corner. Throughout his life, there were no big complications, tragedies, nothing. He grew up white-picket-fence style.
It was a big difference that took a lot of adjusting to in their relationship. But the one major thing they both agreed on was that family was important. It didn't matter that Carter only had two and Jackson had dozens, family was important. If Carter had to jet off to meet her brothers at a moment's notice, it was understood. If Jackson had to run home to his parents for the weekend, it was understood. Family was the most important thing in their lives, it was what bound them securely in their relationship.
So when Jackson said his parents were in town and wanted to finally meet Carter, it made sense that she was beyond worried. Carter knew that if she slipped up, even a little, and made a bad impression on his parents, then her relationship was over. There was no coming back from that.
In order to make their first meeting extra special, Jackson decided to cook a fancy meal at his apartment. He set up candles, got out the expensive tableware, and turned music on in the background. Carter thought it was a bit overboard, considering the first time Jackson met Sam and Dean, Carter was half dressed, Dean was drinking heavy, and everyone was barely awake.
But Jackson insisted on doing things right.
That night, the four of them sat around the table. Piping hot lasagna was piled onto plates and smiles adorned faces. Pleasantries had been exchanged and everyone was nervous to dig in.
"So Carter," Jackson's mom started as she pulled out her silverware, "Jackson told me you work in a school, is that right? What do you teach?"
Carter silently thanked whatever god was above that sent her an easy first question. "Yup, that's right. I teach mythology to the high schoolers in town." Waiting on their meal to cool, Jackson passed out slices of buttered bread and offered no input.
"You know, you don't hear a lot about mythology classes in schools. That would've been a class I'd take when I was in school," Jackson's dad, Daniel, responded in a surprised tone. From what Carter could tell, Daniel was a big teddy bear of a guy. He had a long beard and wholeheartedly agreed with whatever his wife said. Jackson had told her that, growing up, he went to every single sports game his kids played in, took them camping on weekends, and threw big birthday parties every year. It was more than could be said for her own father. She was lucky if John even remembered when her birthday was.
"Right?" Jackson's mom, Betty, chimed in. "I would've loved that class. How did you get involved in such a subject?" Betty, Jackson claimed, was the backbone of their family. She loved every single person in her family to the depths of the earth, but her love didn't always come out in the best ways. She could be tough, and wasn't afraid to be mean when she knew it would give her family the best shot.
By now, the food was cool enough to dig into, and Jackson's mouth was stuffed.
"I've been interested in mythology my whole life, actually. I stayed with my Uncle Bobby a lot growing up, and he had a house full of lore books I couldn't get enough of. My brothers and my dad were always interested in lore too, so I guess it just stuck with me."
Betty took a drink of her wine before responding, "Oh that's right, Jackson said you have two brothers? I would loveto hear all about them! What do they do for a living?"
They hunt monsters, Carter wanted to reply, but for obvious reasons she had to come up with a lie. The lie she had often fallen back on is, "Sam and Dean are private investigators in Kansas. They focus on strange deaths and missing people."
"Well, you don't hear that very often, do you?" Betty laughed awkwardly as she looked at her husband. He gave a chuckle of approval back. Carter's stomach knotted in concern, afraid they didn't like her answer, but Jackson stepped in before it could go south.
"They do some really great work, from what I've seen. Just last month there was a string of missing girls upstate, and local authorities were getting nowhere. Sam and Dean went on up there, and within the week all the girls were back home to their families." Jackson, of course, didn't know what the Winchesters actually did with their time. But Carter figured a lie that was as close to the truth as possible was better than a complete lie.
Betty and Daniel were surprised, but nodded their heads in approval. "Well, that's certainly impressive," Betty spit out, then looked to Daniel to quickly change the subject.
Picking up on her cues, Daniel turned to Carter, "Jackson told us you all like going shooting. How long have you been doing that?"
Carter swallowed the chunk of lasagna she had nervously shoved into her mouth and answered, "I think I was about five the first time I shot a gun." A small smile grew on her face as the memory clouded her. "My dad brought me to an empty field and we shot beer bottles off fence posts all night long."
"That's not far off from how I learned, right Dad?" Jackson asked. "You brought me to Uncle James's property and we shot soda cans from his back porch. Remember that?"
Daniel nodded his head. "Took all you kids there your first time. Your uncle always made barbecue afterwards to celebrate."
All four turned their attention to their meal, digging in and enjoying their newfound company. The rest of the evening passed smoothly, and by the end of the night they were laughing and making plans for the future. The relationship Carter would have with Daniel and Betty would remain strong throughout the years. A soft spot for Carter grew in their hearts over time, just as if she was their own child, and Carter would look to them like they were her parents.
Carter and Jackson dated for 4 ½ years before Jackson proposed. And no matter how good their relationship was, there were still low points. As always, it seemed hunting was the root of most of their problems.
When Carter moved to Pinella Pass and became a teacher, she thought she was done hunting. She thought she had given it up completely to live a normal life. But not even two months in and a case popped up only an hour away. She tried as hard as she could to ignore it, but that's not what Winchesters did. She tried finding another hunter to take it over, but no one bit. Finally, she decided to just screw it and hunt the bastard down herself.
Ever since then, she couldn't pretend to ignore the deaths. In between teaching and waitressing, she caught cases. If she was lucky, she got other hunters to do the physical work while she researched for them, but that wasn't always an option. The amount of times she showed up to work with bruises and sprains was high, but overall no one really questioned it.
That is, until she started dating Jackson.
The first couple bruises were easy to dismiss. "I must've banged my knee on the table," or "I slipped on the ice" or even "I didn't even notice I had that!" Cuts were harder to get out of, but not impossible: "Knife slipped when I was making dinner" or "the neighbor's dog got loose." But after a while, her excuses stopped working. Over the years, Carter had learned to disguise her marks with makeup and acting, acting like she didn't hurt at all when in reality it burned. But even then, Jackson could see through her attempts.
This led to dozens of fights and slammed doors. But after not speaking to each other for a couple days, they always came back together.
4 ½ years of a relationship made them strong. With all the crap Carter went through, Jackson was right there by her side no matter what. It was the most consistent support she'd ever had in her life.
Things started going downhill quickly after four years. Normal life wasn't all it cracked up to be for Carter. Teaching was becoming hell, considering the school had no regard for the work she did. She loved her students, but there was only so much behavior she could put up with. Her rent had gone up, and balancing teaching, waitressing, and hunting was exhausting. Not to mention finding time to spend with Jackson and his family. She was close to just fucking it all and going back home to live with Sam and Dean. Back to her roots, where, although it wasn't easy, at least she wasn't doing it all on her own.
Once the school year ended, she sent in her letter of resignation and cleared her classroom out. Jackson was surprised, but his support was there nonetheless. His support was there the whole time Carter stressed about making rent, and worried for the future. He was there so much, in fact, that he was already making plans for the future.
It was date night on an early summer evening. They met at a secluded outlook, their favorite spot to hang out without having to deal with mobs of people. Ask the younger kids and they'd say it was a make out point, but Carter and Jackson preferred it as a picnic spot. When Carter arrived, Jackson was already there at their favorite picnic table, with the table already elaborately decorated. Tablecloth, candles, actual dishes instead of paper, and a pile of delicious food was spread out and waiting.
Carter didn't know what to make of it. She smiled and laughed as she took in the scene, and Jackson spread his arms and cried, "Surprise!" Was it their anniversary? Someone's birthday? Shit, did she forget something important?
"What's this?" She asked almost nervously.
"Just thought you could use a romantic evening," he said nonchalantly, though inside, his heart drummed quicker. "You like?"
"It's perfect," she stuttered out and gave him a kiss before sitting down across from him.
Their dinner passed with little fanfare, and soon they were onto dessert. Jackson moved the plates to the side and pulled a tray with a metal cover over top out of the basket beside him. He laid it on the table in front of Carter, and a nervous smile bloomed on his lips.
"What's this?" Carter asked. She reached out to lift the lid but Jackson beat her to it. He laid his hand across the handle and hesitated. He cleared his throat once and lifted the lid off the plate. Carter glanced down, a smile on her face in anticipation, expecting to see a slice of cake or brownies or a cookie. But what she found instead made her smile disintegrate and quickened her heart with nerves.
On the plate was a small, black ring box opened up to display the most beautiful ring she had ever seen.
Jackson was going to propose.
Still smiling, Jackson came around to Carter's side of the table and guided her to stand. He grabbed the ring box and ignored the worried face she was making as he got down on one knee.
She could barely look into his eyes as her stomach rolled.
"Carter, from the moment I met you, I knew you were special, and every single day I spend with you is a moment I never want to forget."
Carter wasn't the marrying type. Not once in her life had she planned out her future wedding, pictured the perfect husband and perfect kids like all her classmates seemed to do. She never thought she would get married, hell, she didn't think she'd ever even keep a boyfriend longer than a couple months. She was way out of her territory here, and it scared the crap out of her.
"I hate waking up every morning and not seeing you by my side. I want to spend every single day with you for the rest of our lives."
Every fiber of her being told her to run. Did she really want to spend the rest of her life with Jackson? She didn't know. She didn't know. She hadn't had time to even consider the thought, let alone make a decision. What would the rest of her life look like? Was she willing to give up hunting forever? Surely she couldn't keep the hunting life a secret if she was married.
"I love you so much and want to spend the rest of my life with you. Carter Winchester, will you marry me?"
He stared up at her lovingly and expectantly, just waiting for the three letter word to spill from her mouth.
But she was too freaked to say anything.
Hunters don't get married. They know if they do, they'll spend every single hunt wondering if that was the one that would make them a widow. Carter didn't want to go through that. She couldn't go through any more of that pain.
Not to mention half their relationship was a lie. Jackson thought he knew everything about her, but Carter avoided anything that led to hunting. And, it appeared, most everything led back to hunting.
And what about Sam and Dean? Was she ready to leave them behind for Jackson? Surely she couldn't keep going with the lies she was giving him about them.
When Carter didn't immediately say yes, a worried look crossed his face. She couldn't look in his eyes, but her thoughts moved as fast as her heart. She had to get out of there, had to run away as quick as she could so she could clear her head and really think about her answer. Did she even want to know the answer? Deep down inside, wasn't the answer already made for her?
"I can't," she squeaked out, pulling her hand from his grasp. "I'm so sorry." Her voice was tiny, like she was afraid if she spoke any louder, the universe would collapse around her.
Jackson's face fell to imperceptible levels, but Carter didn't wait around to see more. She grabbed her keys and bolted to her car, pulling out of the parking lot before her tears began to fall.
She had failed, she thought. Failed at normal life, failed at her relationship, failed at what she had worked towards for 8 years. She failed and she was running back home to, what? Pretend like this had never happened?
By the time she got back to her place, she was a crying, snotty mess. She honestly couldn't remember the last time she had cried this hard, but when the dam broke, it flooded. As if on autopilot, the only thing she knew to do once she got home was pack. She was constantly packing and unpacking throughout her childhood, so the action was second nature at this point.
She only grabbed the essentials: clothes, toiletries, sentimental items, and weapons. All her stuff fit into a couple bags, and before she knew it she was done. As she shut the house door behind her, she knew she wouldn't be back. Her life there was burned, and she was determined to put the town in her rear view mirror.
The slamming of the bunker door disturbed the air. Carter's heavy footsteps echoed across the metal grates as both her brothers looked up from their work. She had driven almost nonstop back to the bunker, stopping off for only a couple hours of sleep in a motel. She was nearly numb to everything that had happened the past month. Quitting her job, losing money, and denying Jackson's marriage proposal. She was exhausted and didn't know where to turn. The only safe place she had left was with her brothers in the bunker.
As Carter descended the stairs, both boys looked up from their work in the next room. "Hey, look who stopped by!" Sam called as he turned towards her.
Weighed down by the amount of bags on her arms, Carter stumbled before finally dropping them next to the map table and wandering into the library. "More like, 'look who's moving back in,'" Carter chuckled nervously, before spotting Dean's beer unattended. "Thanks, I could use that." She grabbed the beer and chugged as much as she could before the questions started flying.
"Come again?" Dean asked, eyebrows flying to his hairline. He softly shut his computer and zeroed in on his sister.
"What do you mean you're moving back in?" Sam asked at the same time.
Carter pulled the beer from her lips and grimaced as the warm liquid slid down her throat. "What's with the faces? You didn't rent out my room, did you?" Trying to lighten the mood and avoid the onslaught she was sure to receive, she chuckled before handing the beer back. Seeing it wasn't working, she continued. "Turns out the real world sucks, so I'm back now. Let's not make this a big thing, sound good? Cool, I'll be in my room, let me know when you're getting dinner." She turned away before they could pressure her more but they were too quick.
Dean stood up and followed her to the next room, where she began picking up her many bags. "So that's it? You're done?"
"What about school and Jackson and your place?" Sam asked as he also followed behind.
Carter paused as she heard his name. She hadn't talked to Jackson since that day in the park, and he'd left her at least ten messages already. She didn't even dare look at her phone anymore, knowing anything he left her would hurt. "The school was giving me crap so I quit, I moved out of my place, and," she paused, "Jackson and I are done."
Dean straightened up and hardened his gaze. "What, did he hurt you? Do I have to go kick his ass?" He began thinking of all the ways he could rip Jackson apart, and what weapons he would need to bring.
"No, he didn't …," Carter paused and sighed, exhausted. "Jackson proposed the other day. I said no."
"He proposed?" Dean asked confused. "What, marriage?"
She rolled her eyes, tired of the twenty questions. "Is there any other kind of proposal? Now, as much as I'd love to stand here and recount my life story, I'm going to bed." Sagging under the weight of her bags again, she waddled off to her room.
It took a full hour before anyone came looking for her. In that time, she had managed to dump out the contents of all her bags and spread them in heaps throughout the room. After putting on a pair of wrinkly pajamas, she buried herself under piles of blankets in bed and turned on one of the only DVDs she had in the bunker: a John Wayne western. Carter, quite frankly, hated old westerns. Perhaps that was Dean's doing, as he watched them as often as he could growing up, but Carter would have to make do.
It was Sam that came looking for her. He knocked on her door several times, and finally walked in when he didn't receive a response. "Hey, Dean's getting dinner. You hungry?"
"Starving," Carter admitted as she flipped the comforter off her head.
Sam smiled before taking a glance around the room. Carter hardly ever left her room this much a mess, and would never willingly turn on a western, so he knew things were serious. "Hey, can we talk?" He walked over to the bed and sat down on the edge.
She sighed, knowing this would be coming sooner or later. "Let me guess, you want to know why I turned Jackson down?"
"Well, yeah actually. I don't get it, the last time I talked to you, you guys seemed so happy together. What happened? Did he turn into a serial killer or something?"
Sitting up and pulling her knees to her chest, she relented. "No, I did." Before his confused look could morph into a million questions, she continued. "Hunting, Sam. How many hunters do you know that can get married and still have a happily ever after? Because I don't know any."
Sam hung his head as he processed her words.
"I couldn't quit hunting, and I couldn't handle lying to Jackson about it anymore. He doesn't deserve that, he deserves a normal life, a normal wife. And I couldn't give that to him."
Carter cleared her throat and looked away, willing herself to not get emotional.
"Do you love him?" Sam asked, looking her in the eyes with a seriousness she couldn't comprehend.
"More than I've ever loved anyone before. But that's why I can't be with him. I can't watch him get hurt by hunting, I can't wait for a monster to follow me home one night and take him away from me. I won't do it."
Sam nodded. "I get it, I do. I never told Jessica about hunting for the same reason." He paused before continuing. "So what are you going to do now? What happened with school?"
Carter sighed and fell back onto her pillows. "The administration at my school just kept pissing me off more and more every year. First they wanted me to give out more tests, then they completely changed the curriculum around twice, then they wanted me to do all these staff team building exercises, and they pay me jack shit on top of it all. I swear I was losing money the longer I was there." She sighed and squeezed her eyes shut. "As for now, I don't know. Hunting, I guess. Stay here with you guys, as long as the door is open."
Sam nodded. "You know you're always welcome here with us as long as you need. No matter what. I know Dean would say the same thing."
Opening her eyes back up, she smiled. She sat up and reached for a hug. "Thanks, Sam."
"Soup's on!" Dean's voice called through the bunker and Sam and Carter pulled apart.
"All right, chick flick over, I'm starving." Carter bounded out of her bed at the tune of her stomach growling. Smiling, Sam followed dutifully behind.
I hope you all enjoyed! I will be posting part two in about a week, so keep an eye peeled for that!
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