Roman's Pov coming up next and Becky's too, as we meet some of more of the smaller characters in the middle of this night.
Backstory explanation time. Hope you enjoyed the double update. Have a great night! Eager for your thoughts!
Sara's POV
Everything we had been through reminded me that he had promised he would tell me everything about his past once we were away from the plane and safe. Was this safe enough? It might be later in the evening or midnight even, but I was still so wide awake and just so grateful to be safe in his arms.
I didn't want to wait anymore. I wanted, no I needed to know who I had fallen for. How much worse could the truth be? I didn't want to admit it, but I was a little nervous.
"Roman, you said once we were safe..."
He was already nodding at me knowing what I was asking. He leaned forward and I felt his hands pulled my bra straps back up and the jacket back over me shielding my already wet skin from more rain. I did the same thing, helping get his shirt back up on his shoulders, knowing too that there could be plenty more time for kissing later. I was so anxious to hear what he was going to say.
He lifted me gently enough to lay on his lap with both legs to the side as he held me back again in the crook of his arm. Roman rocked me back and forth and seemed deep in thought, like he was looking for the right words to say. "I know that what I am about to tell you is against agency policy but screw it. I just can't keep you in the dark anymore Sara. I can't. It has hurt me so much to lie to you."
His expression was mournful, pleading like he was scared that once he had told me the truth, I would reject him.
"It's okay Roman. Nothing is going to change how I feel about you," I looked up in his eyes. I prayed what I was saying was the truth. I loved him, deeply but there were things that could change that. Serial killer, maybe? If he had actually orchestrated terrorist attacks for real? Bombed embassies? Killed children? I didn't even know if I wanted to think much about it.
"You don't know that" he replied quickly, his voice low. He was right, I didn't. "I want to believe that this won't change anything but whatever happens I just know I need to tell you. You of all people involved in this deserve the truth."
I ran my hand up and down his arm as he talked and tangled our fingers together. He smiled as he looked down at our entwined hands and lifted them to kiss my knuckles tenderly. "I don't want to lose you baby," he whispered, his lips on my skin.
"I trust you Roman. Just please tell me," I coaxed him, my eyes soft on his as I smiled and pulled our hands so that I could kiss his knuckles too. My brown eyes never left his as I saw his eyelids flutter as my lips brushed across the back of his hand.
"Okay." He sucked in a breath, and I braced myself and had no idea what for. "I work for the CIA Sara."
My eyes must have looked twice their size the way he was looking at me. He was studying my expression maybe fearful of me pulling away from him at the truth. CIA? "Okay, um, wow." I cleared my throat seeing his desperate gaze on me. "I uh thought people only said that in the movies."
He chuckled lightly, pulling his hand out of mine only to re-tangle our fingers together again and again like nervous habit, not that I was complaining. Any way we were touching felt amazing.
"Well, it is not as glamorous as Hollywood portrays it. But it's true baby. I have worked for them for almost 10 years, right out of high school. My first year of University I was approached, and I wanted to serve my country, so I accepted. There was extensive training for almost the whole first 2 years before I became field ready. My cousin Jey in that time was recruited as well and rose up the ranks faster than I did. He became a special agent in charge of the missions, and he is amazing at his job. He is my only hope of us getting out of here and getting rescued. He would have known the plane went down since they knew we were to arrive in Spain in 12 hours."
I stayed silent just taking in what he was saying. He tucked a stray strand of wet hair behind my ear and stroked my cheek. "You with me so far Beauty?" I nodded and urged him to continue.
"I was assigned a mission to recover some mystery tech. I don't know who had it or what their endgame even was with it, but it has the power to remotely take control of any airplanes nav systems to use the plane as a weapon." My eyes widened at that as he explained more. "It's like 9'11, but now the terrorists don't even need to hijack a plane and use it to attack innocent people. It's less messy and so much more dangerous."
"Was that what happened? Is that why we crashed here?" I asked him timidly, almost not wanting to know that there were more enemies then just the ones we already were on the island with.
He nodded leaning forward, pulling my head closer and running his lips through my hair, while his thumb stroked the back of my hand gently. "I don't know for sure. You don't have to be scared though I am not going to let anyone touch you." He kissed my forehead. "Part of me would love to tell you everything will be fine. The creeps on the beach will all get re-arrested, my cous, my Uso we call him will rescue us and we will take down the terrorists and clear my name. But that all sounds like a lot to expect."
He gave me a shaky smile and I realized he was being real, not all tough and confident like he had been with me in the beginning. He was telling me he couldn't magically fix everything and not just telling me what I wanted to hear.
I squeezed his hand in mine and smiled up at him. "I trust you Roman, like I said. I know you will do everything in your power to get us out of here and keep us alive."
He smiled and this time it reached his eyes. "I know, and you are right. I will do all I can to protect you. I know everything sounds overwhelming and hopeless, but I choose to have faith. Without that, I have nothing. It's the only thing that's keeping me going."
I smiled back up at him and captured his lips in a quick kiss before pulling back again. "I know together we can get out of this mess. We can survive this." I sat up more in his lap determined to listen more to his story. "So, you think the men who hired you used that tech to crash us here?"
He nodded slowly and ran his tongue over his lips which just made me want to dive in to taste him again and again and just forget talking. I realized I wasn't scared of who he really was. If anything, I loved him so much more knowing he was not a criminal and instead a hero for our country.
"I can't say for sure because I don't have any proof but yes, I believe that is exactly what happened here. The men I was working for undercover used us and this was the perfect way to get rid of us. I was going to testify, and my cousin had arranged for us in the agency to work together with the Bulgarian government to grant me immunity if I could give them the name of the man that was in possession of the tech we wanted to destroy. I embedded myself enough to get hired to head up a hit for these monsters. Seth, his brother Dolph, were on the team, and Strowman and K.O. who are both dead were too."
I cringed remembering the man Kevin got shot and took his last breaths looking at us hiding in the back of the plane. "They had no idea I wasn't just some hired thug like they were. My job was to plan and execute the hit as a demonstration of the techs power. We were supposed to kill the President of Bulgaria's whole family at his daughter's wedding on May 23rd last month.
I gasped at that, and Roman's eyes were studying mine. I'm sure he was dying to know what I was thinking then. "I'm okay. Just keep going," I reassured him, but I felt a lump in my throat and swallowed hard, scared to know more.
He nodded slowly as if considering my request, his eyes locked on mine, the gray in them so dark and intense.
"Sara just kiss me please," he pleaded his eyes looking glassy. Was he nervous that this was too much for me to take? "I need to know I'm not losing you by telling you all this. You have no idea how amazing it feels to be real with you, no more lies but I just..."
I didn't let him finish and as he was talking, I twisted my body around more and I gripped his shoulders to steady myself before plunging my lips hard onto his.
His arms came up around my back holding me tight as I deepened the kiss, trying to show him that nothing had changed. He needed me to show him, it sounded like more than just tell him and I was more than happy too.
He had faith keeping him going. Well, I had him.
I cupped his face as I heard him moan and my tongue found his and I sucked on it gently as I felt his fingers up in my hair holding my head in place. I pressed my bra clad chest back up against him and whimpered at all the feelings racing at lightning speed through me.
How was it that every kiss could be more intense than the next with this incredible man? The more I knew him, the more I loved him and wanted him to be mine forever.
We devoured each other's moans and kissed hungrily, tasting, aching and needy for each other. I wondered if somehow, I could make everything just disappear around us.
Like the next moment I wouldn't be high up in a tree on an island with dangerous murderers and rapists wandering around free.
Instead, I would be laying in Roman's bed wrapped up in his sheets as he lay above me, his strong muscled arms at the sides of my head, his fingers brushing my hair from my face as he leaned down kissing me so deeply as he made me his.
I could feel his hard body and imagined my nails digging into his bare back as I enveloped him in my warmth. Our foreheads would touch, his dark eyes fixated on mine. I could see the sweat dripping down his cheek to his jaw before he dove down and kissed me again, harder, deeper as he groaned my name into my mouth, thrusting me harder into the soft mattress below me...I felt so close. My feelings spinning wildly as I felt waves cresting as my heart pounded. So close...Another moan from him pulled me back from my fantasies of us together.
Whoa, where the hell did that come from? I wondered.
I was having X rated fantasies while I was kissing Roman! Sure, it would be amazing to be out of danger, safe and warm behind locked doors with no threats to our happiness anywhere. But that was not out reality right now. As much as I wanted it, I needed to be here for him now in the present and not be longing for the future that we might not get to.
I didn't even know where he lived or where his bed was. I could have imagined us at my apartment with Ian likely staring the newcomer in my life and most likely jealous of Roman snuggling me.
But no, somehow my mind brought me to his place. Maybe his home meant safety and security for me more than the paper-thin walls and weak locks I had in my apartment. It wasn't even mine, not really.
I should have left there months ago and not kept dwelling in the past. I had taken over my brother and his girlfriend's little place. My brother was an artist and not making much money for them and his girlfriend had been a teacher before she went on maternity leave. I didn't know why but I felt closer to my only brother there. I had even left the room they had decorated as a nursery all alone with the crib sitting there and gifts from baby showers and a swing and rocking chair. I would sit there for ages some nights rocking in that chair and just held a soft blanket to my face and cry for my family.
I had not even realized it, but I started crying right then while I was kissing Roman. He sensed my change in mood instantly and pulled his head back, tilting my chin up to look deeply into my eyes. "Hey, my Beauty, why so sad?"
I sniffled and drew in some more rain smelling fresh air as he rubbed my shoulders through the thin leather, helped my arms in the sleeves and held me close again. "What were you thinking about?" he prodded gently. "Whatever it is you can tell me. I want to be here for you too, just like you are for me." I smiled at him, and he smiled softly back, while brushing a wet strand of my hair back from my cheek.
"Be real with me too Sara. You don't have to be afraid." His head was bent low, his hair brushing my forehead and falling all the way down my shoulder. "I have known I think since the day I met you that you were carrying such a deep pain. Please don't carry it alone. Let me help you." His eyes were wide in the near darkness with just the moon shining down on us.
I sniffled feeling a few stray tears slip down my cheeks. I knew I should tell him. He would understand. I did trust him. I shuddered suddenly feeling a bolt of energy zipping around inside my veins as his head bent more and he kissed the tears away that had dripped down my face. His fingers were in my hair as he guided my head to catch each tear as they fell. "God, Roman," I whimpered, my fingers wrapping around his waist again.
I cleared my throat and sniffled again. "I want to tell you and I will, I promise. Just please finish your story first. I want to understand. And I promise you nothing will change between us. I love you."
He grinned widely at me, his expression so peaceful and happy like being here with me was enough to fix everything that was wrong in our lives. "Okay Sara, okay. I want you to understand too I do, SO much."
He pulled my head to his and kissed the crown of my head while cuddling me tighter in his arms. "I know I told you we were hired to kill the President and his family?" I nodded remembering his revelations before he begged me to kiss him.
"Anyway, as you know from your research that day at the prison. They are alive and well. And I told you I was on the plane. My team wanted us to do it. Just wipe out that man's whole family. They had no idea I was CIA and was just there to track the hit back to the man who ordered it. But of course, I couldn't go through with it. All that collateral damage, in the name of retrieving the mystery tech. All those innocent people. There were children there; mother's nursing their babies, grandparents all there to celebrate the wedding. I could see that through the satt images."
"Strowman killed passengers and took their identities to sneak us on board the plane. That was hard enough for me. I prided myself in being an agent that did not take innocent life unless there was no other option. Once aboard, he took out the Air Marshal. K.O. was in charge of the tech, making sure everything went smoothly. All he had to do was plant the device to allow the man on the ground to hack the planes instruments and they then had full control. It was a full airplane, passengers of all ages and races all just trusting the pilot and his control of the plane to safely make it to their destination."
He drew in a deep breath, running his hands up and down my back now covered in the leather jacket. "So, I lied. I told the men that hired us that the satellite showed the wedding reception had started early and they were already all there. I lied about the timing when in fact there was no one there yet except the few servers and caterers for the food."
Roman sniffled and wiped his cheek. "Their deaths were on me," he said sadly. "I could not save everyone."
I still didn't understand everything, but I saw the pain on his face, the compassion and the loss he must have felt. I barely had comprehended the whole. "I work for the CIA', let alone all this.
"Hey baby," I tilted his chin down to me. As he had spoken of those that had died, his eyes had wandered away from mine. "I know you did everything you could," I looked pointedly at him.
He sniffled again. "I tried. We had a half hour once we gave the times to the men taking control of the plane and I just claimed their satt images weren't accurate and they believed me. Hell, I was the leader, getting paid 3 million just for this hit alone and it was only a demonstration." His gaze in my eyes was still so deep, so seeking of my understanding.
"Seth, Dolph, Strowman and K.O. jumped from the plane and I told them I would be right behind them. But instead, I rounded up all the people on the plane before it was taken over from the ground and I got them all to parachute to safety. Then the empty plane crashed into the reception area."
He had done everything he could. If it wasn't for him then all those people in the plane would have died too. Wow.
"The men who hired us arranged a meet to pay us, but they never showed. Instead, we were met by dozens of cops that had surrounded the area and we almost didn't get away. I was shot and nearly died."
My mouth fell open at that. What? "Where Roman?" I found myself needing to know. He moved me back further off his lap more while still holding me securely in one hand while the other unbuttoned his jeans.
My eyes must have widened still more, and he put a finger to my lips. "It's fine baby. The wound was just right here." He folded down the hem of the dark washed jeans to reveal a slight scar on the skin near his hipbone. I ran my fingers across it tenderly before he buttoned the jeans back up and hid the damaged skin. I wondered how many other scars he had hidden. I knew from the shower even that he had been through so much more with the two women in his life and I cringed to know what other damage other missions might have given him.
"It hurt like hell, but I survived. Getting shot is never on my list of fun past times.' He laughed and then cringed in pain, and I wondered if I was leaning too much on his bruised ribs. But he just held me there and continued.
"I nearly bled out before Rollins and his brother found me. We had all run different directions and once I didn't show up at the rendezvous point, they started looking for me. They hated me and blamed me for the mission going so wrong. But they wanted their money, no question there and I was the only conduit to it through the men who hired us. So, they saved my life thinking I could still get them their money. They were so wrong."
"By the time we got to an underground safe house it was all over the news and they had our pictures claiming we were responsible for the attempted assassination of their President. So, we ran and kept running barely getting out of the country alive. Jey said the way the CIA was going to get the name of the man at the top of this plot was to follow the money. But with no money exchanged, no bank deposits, no account numbers meant no money trail. Nothing. We had failed."
Roman sighed and I watched his head fall back against the tree trunk. I sat up more in his lap and lifted my hand to tangle my fingers in his hair at the base of his neck. His eyes closed and he moaned almost silently as I saw his throat tighten as he swallowed.
"You didn't fail Roman. You saved all those people from being killed. You are their hero." I tilted his head back to mine seeking out his forlorn gray eyes. "Just like you are my hero," I smiled at him and pressed my lips to his again never get enough of the taste of him. He was shaking now too, and I guessed not from the cold. Was he that relieved I hadn't rejected him? Was he that scared that I would have? I wanted to hear the end of his story.
"How did you get all the way to the States with so many people after you? How does Dean fit into all this?" I saw his lip quiver at the mention of his best friend. "Hey, hey Baby," I said grabbing his face, sitting up nearly on my knees that were on either side of his legs. "You said he would be okay right? You can just give him the liquid in that pen, and he will wake up?"
He nodded, pulling me back down in his lap. Maybe my closeness helped him too?
"I can't let him die. I just can't. Renee would never recover."
My face scrunched up at the new name. "Who?" I queried gently. I thought that sounded familiar from him mumbling about a woman on the plane when he thought Dean had been killed.
"Renee is Dean's wife. She is pregnant with their first baby and she's due in only a few weeks." A silent tear slipped from his eye. "She needs him. I have to bring him back to her. I need him too. He and I have been through everything together."
"Wow, that is amazing that Dean has a family. We will get him back to them, I know it Roman." I tried to sound strong and confident.
"He is amazing," he whispered, his eyes still holding so much sadness. "He had been there for me since we met in training for the CIA, and we clicked instantly. Always goofing around and pissing off the team leader trying to actually get us to concentrate and teach us what we needed to know. We have always had each other backs and would die for the other." He shook his head and looked like he was trying to pull himself from the past again to finish his story.
"Once we were caught in the States, Jey pulled some strings with the higher ups to get me protection in the prison. He paid my cellmate to keep the others on my team away from me or any other creep looking to fight, had him to deal with. My cous bought me protection in that hell hole and I have no idea how I would have survived otherwise. As added assistance Jey called in a few favors and got my buddy in as a CO at Maxwell Heights. In there it was just Dean and I against the world. Jey knew I was already on the bad side of all the guys on my team that wanted me to pay for them getting thrown in there and being damn near eye candy he was so scared even being strong that gangs could overpower me, and God knows what could happen in there. I am apparently the perfect target for those type and that just makes me sick. "
I stroked my thumb down his cheek slowly and felt sick in my stomach too just thinking about it. "And yet you still ended up getting hurt despite that protection baby. I'm so sorry. I wish I could have done more." I ran my hand over his still bright black eye that Miz had given him. I reached up and kissed around his eye soothing the bruised skin.
He whimpered softly against my head. "I had you Sara for every little cut and scrape. And you staying with me when I was poisoned and holding me when I was delirious from the burn pain. And everything little of pain relief your body gave me that night was pure fucking heaven baby. Your touch, hell just your presence made everything better."
Suddenly there was a rustling down below and I felt Roman pull me more to his chest and out of sight from the ground. Was someone there? Oh God. Had they heard us? I lay curled tight against him and tried to calm my heart that was racing in my chest as I felt his arms wrapped tight around me. Roman pulled the jacket up all the way over my head too and we barely breathed as the rustling the branches breaking below got louder.
"Sara! Roman!" I recognized Randy calling us. His voice sounded far away from us being all the way up in the trees.
Roman passed me a look of confusion as he untangled himself from my arms and bent lower. "Orton! We are up here!" he hissed out. The pilot jerked his head up and saw us.
"Thank God you guys are okay. I woke up a few minutes ago and Bec was gone! I looked everywhere and I have no idea where she is! We have to find her before the cons do Roman. I don't even want to think of them getting their hands on her!"
Roman looked back at me and gently kissed my lips before he moved to start climbing down the tree and helped me down after him. Once we were on the ground, he grabbed a panicked Randy by the shoulders. "We need to stay calm. Just take a breath."
I saw him look back at me and nod. "Sara, why don't you go make sure Dean is okay and stay with him and Randy and I will find his friend. Okay?"
The pilot ran his hand over his shorn head and looked like was just fine with that. I nodded to him and with one more kiss to my forehead Roman looked deeply in my eyes as I hugged him tight, slipping my hands beneath his still open shirt once more and soaked in the oxygen I felt from him just a few seconds longer.
"We will be right back okay. Just stay with my buddy. I love you." Roman stroked my hair and pressed a firm kiss to my lips and was turning quick to leave with a shaky smile.
I nodded numbly, " I love you too. Be safe." I called out and he smiled and nodded." My head was still so full of all that had already happened and how much danger was all around as I watched both of them head off into the darkness. I didn't move till they were well past where I couldn't see them anymore.
It hurt... every damn time I was away from Roman. Especially after the times we had been physically ripped apart like that night in the staff room or on the plane too as he risked so much just to kiss me one last time.
I let out a deep breath already missing him and worrying and turned toward the cave. I slipped out of the leather jacket thinking on the cold night I should have given it to him to wear, but he had left so quickly. But now I tossed it to the ground and instead pulled the sleeves of his jumpsuit up and over my bra and on me, wrapping me in its warmth as much as I could be and then pulled the jacket back on over top.
No, the prison orange wasn't attractive in the least, but it smelled like him. That what I wanted. To feel closer to Roman. I looked back down the way they left. Everything would be okay right? Yes. he was smart and he would come back to me. I just needed to trust that and trust him like I had been saying.
I moved the fronds back and stepped in the cave and saw the dim light from flashlight laying out and shining on the wall. I sat on the ground and moved in and took Dean's vitals and determined that I would focus on him. Roman wanted me to take care of his best friend so I needed to focus here and not worry about them.
I whispered a silent prayer that they would be back soon and that the young copilot was safe too. It wasn't safe for any of us to be wandering the darkness at night alone.
