A/N Hiding from my housework but stuck not being able to go to work with my kids with stomach flu here. One more chapter possibly coming here yet too to watch for this weekend and then I will see if I can find some ideas for the other story too.
Meeting some secondary characters here but they are still pretty important overall. Broken people are really struggling, and healing is messy and yet sharing and caring and safety comes in strange ways.
Becky's POV
I froze, feeling the large hand on my mouth and immediately started squirming to get away. I tried to throw my head back against the attackers, but the person must have ducked to the side because I felt nothing behind me to slam into. His hand tightened around my mouth as I heard him let out a curse as I tried to bite his skin that was nearly suffocating me.
My thoughts just raced to the fear of that night; being held down and the man tearing at my clothes as I whimpered behind his large hand preventing me from screaming for help.
Oh God no! I felt the tears just start pouring down my cheeks as the terror overwhelmed me. I felt the person's mouth right by my ear and could smell his breath against my skin.
"Please," I begged from behind his hand over my mouth. I felt his other hand around my waist tighten, feeling him push me into the tree. I put my hands up in front of me to stop my body from crashing into the rough bark.
"Stop fighting me," his voice hissed out. "Someone else could hear."
I was terrified and obeyed him right away and as much I wanted to push and lash out, I stopped struggling. His hand loosened a bit on my mouth as he had me pressed against the tree, preventing me from turning around to see him. I could feel his nose in my hair by my ear and I could not stop the shivering that was spreading through my body.
I was still only wearing my thin blouse and skirt that I was sure was sweaty and possibly torn now from my struggling. Randy had offered me a hoodie of his, but I liked the cool night air, so it lay in the cave where I had been sleeping.
But now with a strange man pressing his body against me...all I could think of was how much I should have worn the damn hoodie out to go to the bathroom and how scared I was that night.
My mind was showing me flash after flash of those moments when my attacker tore my clothes with the knife he had against my throat and his sick expression as I felt the air against my bare skin. "Please don't hurt me. I can't...I can't...go through that again." I was leaning down, my forehead against the tree as the tears poured down my cheeks.
I wasn't sure if it was my words that changed things but his hands on me instantly felt lighter. I felt his fingers in my hair, his touch almost tender. "I'm not going to hurt you," he breathed in my ear, his hand falling down off its rough grip on my waist.
I tried to turn around to see him and he grabbed my head, keeping me facing forward. This man had not been very rough and only seemed to be angry, his touch firmer as I tried to turn around just now.
"Don't. Stay facing that way," he ordered me, forcing my forehead against the tree in front of us. His hand slid to the back of my neck to keep me facing away from him. "Who are you?" I heard him ask me. I could feel his mouth by my ear.
"Rebecca. Umm. Becky Lynch," I stuttered out feeling my knees weak and ready to buckle. "Please just let me go," I begged again feeling more tears in my eyes.
"Who is Finn?" the voice demanded, and I sucked in a breath. How did he know anything about him? Why the hell should I tell him anything about my dead husband?
"None of your damn business!" I hissed out angrily.
I heard the tearing of fabric and I nearly jumped out of my skin! I gasped out as my eyes slammed shut.
It took me a moment to realize that it wasn't even my clothes that had been torn. I felt a soft piece of fabric come over my eyes and being tied around tightly to the back before the man spun me around, so my back was against the tree.
His head was still just as close to me now that I was facing him as I tried to see through the blindfold, he had put on me. I could feel his hair, just slightly against my neck, like it was longer, and the strands went back and forth on my bare skin above my blouse as he had tied it up.
Then I felt his fingers at first by my throat and then slowly slip down my chest and my breath froze in my throat as he unbuttoned one button of my blouse, and I started struggling.
His other hand was fast onto my throat, again not tight but stifling my cries as I felt another button and another undone and then I felt him trail a finger down my neck till he made a circle around my ring laying on my chest.
"Who is Finn?" he asked again. Oh God, all he wanted was the necklace? My heart had been in my throat and my chest heaving.
"Is he looking for you? I heard you talking to yourself and holding this." The man's voice was more insistent, as I felt his hand barely brush the skin between my breasts as he palmed the ring in his hand.
"Go to hell! I am not talking to you about him. Don't you dare say his name again!" I flailed wildly, trying to hit or punch the man in front of me.
His hands grabbed quickly for my wrists and held them tight against his chest, stopping me from attacking him more until I stopped struggling. "Do you know there are only 3 women on this island? The Doc if she and Reigns survived is well protected by him, and the pregnant stewardess. So, I thought they were the only 2. But you make 3."
I kept struggling in his grip and just wanted him to let me go but his hands were firm and tight around my wrists.
The man spoke again. "You should be damn glad it was me who found you and not one of the men eager to take what he wants from any woman here. There are murderers and rapists and men with life sentences that haven't had that touch of a woman in years or decades."
I was furious that he had stopped me from hitting him. I was panting with fear at everything that was happening and what he was saying. "How the hell do I know you won't take advantage of me? What makes you so noble?"
I gasped out and then choked on a sob as I flashed back again to that night. "He said I wanted it. That the way I looked as I walked down the street, already wearing a skirt, just like now too, making it SO easy for him was why he picked me to rape that night. He destroyed me and he didn't even actually finish, but everything he did..."
I could not control the sobs from my throat, and I started gasping I could barely breath. "So go ahead, there isn't much left of me to take. I would probably hardly feel it anyway. I'm already dead inside. "
I pushed away from his grip on my arms, and he actually let go. I figured I would help it along. I just wanted this to be over. Maybe if I didn't struggle it wouldn't hurt as much. I felt numb and just wanted to leave. I struggled so much and fought like my life depended on it the last time, but I felt dead already so what was the point in fighting at all?
I stood back, my hands feeling the tree still behind me and ripped my blouse open the rest of the way and literally goaded him to do something. I kept the blind fold on and just stood there in front of him, fighting the shivers racing through my body.
"Go ahead," I said again but my voice betrayed my daring act and shook as I spoke. I was even braver or stupider, I could not tell which, and shook the shirt down my arms and let it fall to the dirt behind me.
He was silent and I had no idea what he was thinking at all. I could still barely breath I felt so scared and held onto the edges of the bark on the tree with the tips of my fingers at my waist.
"Jesus," I heard him gasp out, but I had no idea if that was good or bad.
I stood silently and felt shivers from the night air curling around my half naked body now.
"What...are you doing?" I heard him whisper. His voice sounded closer than before and so I thought he must have moved toward me.
"Not fighting you. "I fought to choke back a sob. "So it doesn't hurt so much and then maybe I won't have nightmares for months or years." I mumbled softly.
I heard a sharp intake of his breath. "Do you have any idea how messed up that sounds?"
I was messed up. So fucking messed up. I felt tears slipping down my cheeks even past the blindfold. "Maybe if you kiss me first..." I whimpered. Yeah, like that wasn't even more messed up...
And I felt him closer again and warm palms slid to rest on my waist, just so lightly as I felt his face so so close to mine. The air felt so thin between us, and I swallowed a lump in my throat.
But he pulled back and his hands slid up to my hands at my sides, moving his palms up and lifting my arms all the way up over my head.
He didn't say another word and I had no idea what he was thinking. I was literally standing there in my green lacy bra in front of a stranger that wasn't even allowing me to see him.
I felt his palms so slowly run down my bare arms. I was shaking, trembling was more, because his touch did not feel rough or violent in the least. It felt gentle and soft, but I was still so scared. His fingers trailed all the way down my bare sides, and to my hips before I felt his hands slip away.
"Keep those eyes closed sweetheart," I heard him say.
And I did, still trembling but having no idea what was happening. And before I knew it, warmth encircled me, and sleeves slipped down my arms as he pulled a long-sleeved shirt all the way down my body, past my thighs. The blindfold shifted as the shirt was pulled down past it and he adjusted it and made sure it was tighter again.
"You didn't mean that," he breathed. "Any of it. You don't want me to kiss you or touch you...You are shaking so much anywhere I did. All you want is to feel safe."
Once I was wrapped in clearly what must be his shirt, I felt him move in closer again and his lips were right by my ear as he pulled me in his arms, and I did not resist and just sunk down and felt all the emotion of what I just did hit me and started crying in his embrace.
What the hell had I just done? He was so right. Oh God...
Had losing my husband and all the grief and loss and trauma just been too much? I wasn't thinking at all. What the hell did I think I was accomplishing by being like that with a complete stranger? I felt numb and broken and yet so raw and ripped apart at the same time. Like I wanted to feel something even if it was pain. I was so damn confused.
I had no idea. I wanted to feel safe so badly. I had just borne so much to this man, literally offered myself to him and he still was the gentleman.
"I would never do that to someone. Ever," he almost growled out. "Who the fuck told you you wanted it and then took advantage of you? That is just sick."
I sniffled, still blindfolded, my head against his chest, my cheek against what I thought felt like a thin shirt still despite that he must have offered me another layer he had been wearing. "I have no idea. They never caught him. But he haunts my dreams. I can't sleep without seeing his sick grin at me."
I had no idea why I was even telling him that. My sobs made it hard to breath as I gasped for air again and again. "Finn...was my husband. He loved me. He brought me back to life and then he died!" I sobbed harder now, holding the ring tight in my hand and was surprised to feel the man's hand on my head and running down through my hair.
"I'm so sorry. Have you not felt safe since your husband last held you?" he mumbled his voice low.
I shook my head against his chest and clung tighter. Everything about this felt so unreal so crazy and I had hardly been able to share anything with even my grief counsellor but for some reason emotion had been just pouring out now.
"So how were you on this flight? What are you doing here?" he asked me, his arms around me as I just lay against him.
"I. Uh I am the copilot. I was in the cockpit the whole flight. I have no idea what is going on or why we are here. I just want to go home. But home is empty too and so quiet and dark and I just miss him so much. "
I sniffled; my nose stuffed from crying as more tears wet the fabric that he had covered my eyes with. My knees buckled and I felt despite the man's hold on me, my body slid down the tree and I huddled in a ball, my legs tucked up to my chest.
He must have sunk to the ground with me because I never lost the sense of his touch on me. "I am not going to hurt you. You will be okay Rebecca. Someday you will believe that," he said.
That sounded so soothing so different than I would have expected from an encounter with a stranger in the dark that wasn't even letting me see him. What was he scared of?
I felt fingers on my bare leg now too. "You are bleeding," the man said softly, and I felt him wiping it away. I stayed still as I felt his hand cup the back of my leg and I held my breath having no idea what he would do next.
"It's not deep. Just some scratches. Nothing needs stitches thankfully," I heard him say, his hand still cradling my leg. I didn't know what to make out of any of this.
"Umm I don't suppose if I did, you would have stitched me up?" I dared to say.
"I could have," was his instant reply.
I realized I wanted to see him. I reached up quick toward my face and tried to pull the blindfold off and felt his hand stop me. I wanted so much to know who he was. Was this one of the guards on the plane? Who was he? It could not possibly be a prisoner.
"No, sweetheart. I'm not comfortable with that right now. Just be happy I found you." he breathed, and I still had his hand in mine, feeling his skin and I felt my heart racing as I felt him lace our fingers together. I was happy he found me. I just wanted to know who he was.
"I have lost someone too. Someone I loved deeply, and I've made mistakes...hurt people I cared about that didn't deserve it. I've had to be someone I didn't want to be... I still am being someone I don't recognize..." he mumbled into the air between us, changing the subject, deflecting. He lost someone...maybe that was why I felt I could share? Or why it felt like he understood.
But he's hurt people? Maybe he was a prisoner.
Suddenly I just wanted to get away, despite everything we had shared.
But as I tried to stand up and pull away from him, I lost my footing and started falling without having any sense of balance with my eyes covered. He caught me and I had my arms around him to stop my fall but was still so scared of everything.
"Oh Becky, you're still shaking so much..." he whispered, and I nodded.
"I just want to go please...if you hurt people I just..."
I knew it was everything about this whole situation that had me scared and emotional and so confused, and I started shivering and shaking and could not stop.
Pulling me back up to my feet he didn't argue more or try to defend himself. I felt his hands on my face and his breath so close like I could taste it. I froze just captivated by the feelings like he was just lost in me or needing to share more somehow. I stayed quiet and nearly held my breath.
"I don't want to hurt anyone," he mumbled. "I hate it. I am not even sure why I am telling you this. You just feel..."
Somehow the man and I said the same word at the same moment. "Safe."
"And different," he added softly.
I smiled and that mere act alone felt so foreign to me and again I wished I could see him. But then instead of the possible reward of seeing him smile I felt lips on my forehead. Just gentle and light and then they were gone. But I had felt them for the briefest of moments.
He turned me another direction. "Keep going this way and you will find your friends," he whispered, his lips by my ear and I could feel the slight stubble from a possible beard or goatee tickle my skin.
"You don't want to get lost again. Stay together to stay safe," he said.
I shook my head in agreement that I sure as hell did not want to get lost in the darkness again. He was helping me find my way back?
None of this made any sense. Who was he? How did he know where I should go?
My fingers smoothed the fabric down more over my stomach and waist and I felt that there was a rip in the bottom of the long-sleeved shirt he had put on me. That must have been where he had gotten the material to blindfold me.
"Wait, who are you?" I called out. I pulled at the blindfold and tugged it off my eyes. Whirling around, I looked for him but there was no one anywhere that I could see.
He was gone.
I looked down at the shirt I was wearing. It was white and unfolding the hem at the bottom I saw the prison logo in the inside. So, this was prison issue clothes.
It HAD been a prisoner I had just been with.
Turning back the way he had me facing, I started walking. I must have been walking at least 20 minutes, the long sleeves of the shirt around me now shielded my skin from the cooler air. It didn't take long, and I recognized my surroundings more and sure enough the cave I had left was right in front of me. I breathed a sigh of relief that I had made it back. I was just about to push back the fronds and step into the tiny hidden cave when Sara came out.
"Becky! Thank goodness you are safe," she said as her eyes were looking behind me. "Where is Roman...and Randy?" She was looking around wildly, her eyes wide with panic. I shook my head and had no idea what she was talking about.
"What do you mean? I thought Roman was with you and Randy was right here." I looked down and wondered why I hadn't realized right then that he wasn't sleeping outside the cave like before. "I just went out to pee and got turned around in the dark and then got lost for a while."
Sara grabbed my shoulders. "You mean they didn't find you?!" I nodded at her, seeing her panicked expression. "They both went out looking for you a while ago." She rushed back in the cave, and I followed her. She was kneeling by Dean and checking his pulse with her hand before putting her palm on his forehead.
She stood up quickly and moved past me and out of the cave again. "Stay here and look after Dean. Just make sure he's not too warm or cold and I will go find them and tell them you are okay. It's so dangerous out there in the dark with all the cons free."
I nodded at her and knelt down beside the unconscious man. "I'm so sorry," I mumbled, my head down. I could tell the doctor was upset at me. "I hope you find them. I didn't mean to put anyone in any danger."
Sara gave me a sympathetic half smile before she slipped out of the orange jumpsuit and pulled the leather jacket back over her and rushed away.
I leaned back against the wall of the cave and fingered the hem of the long shirt on me. I did not even want to imagine what could have happened to me if the mystery man had not found me. I checked on Dean and made sure he had some blanket too. I wiped a cloth over his head and kept his forehead cool and checked to see that his hands and feet were not too hot or cold.
Closing my eyes, I pulled the blanket over me too and I uttered a silent prayer that Randy and the others would make it back safe before I laid there and tried to sleep. Sleep eluded me so much, but I could hope and try to get even a few hours. As messed up and confusing as everything had been, I had felt safe for a few minutes. I had felt understood.
Yes, Randy and Char had always been there too, but this was different. Something about this man made me feel safe enough to open up and I felt like he did to me too and that we both needed it somehow and he didn't have anyone else either. He protected me from myself tonight and that was not something I could say many others had done.
Sara's POV
"Roman, where are you?" I breathed out, talking to myself. I had no idea where to go. All I knew was that I had to find him. Becky was safe and sound in the cave with Dean and now I was stumbling around in the near darkness looking for my Roman. He had to be okay.
I was so proud of him and knew by the look on his face how much he didn't want to leave me to go look for Becky. I wanted to insist on coming with them, but I knew that he would want someone to stay back and look after his buddy. So as much as I wanted to be there for him and stay together, I knew he was grateful that I didn't fight him on his decision.
It wouldn't be long from now before he could give Dean the antidote that would wake him up. I knew his wound was not life threatening and as long as I kept changing his dressings and keeping it clean, he should be okay till we could get him to a hospital. I just hoped we could get rescued soon.
There was yelling and shouting that I could hear from further away already and I wondered if they had gone all the way up to the beach to look for her. What if Roman and Randy had gotten caught!?
I felt my heart just jump in my chest and I had to stop and catch my breath as my hand steadied myself leaning on the nearest tree. No! He could not have gotten caught. I refused to let my mind even entertain that possibility. But now I could not shake that I needed to know he was okay.
He had to be okay. I needed him.
I raced faster through the trees towards the yelling and as I got closer, I could see the dim glow of a fire. The cons voices were getting louder, and I could hear grunts and groans. It sounded like a fight. Please no!
I was panting and nearly out of breath by the time I reached the edge of the trees by the beach. I zipped up the leather jacket Roman had given me to wear when it started pouring before. I felt warm and dry in the jacket even though my skirt was still making my legs feel freezing cold. But I knew I could not wear the orange suit anywhere and risk people seeing me either.
So, I trudged through the trees and bushes and kept shivering and wishing I was back up in the tree and snuggly and warm with him.
Roman. Where was he?
I pushed my hair from my eyes and squinted to try to make sense of the hazy dark images around the glowing fire. They looked to be gathered around in a circle and my stomach clenched as I heard another groan and more cheers.
What the hell was happening? Were they hurting him?
I crept closer, staying mostly behind the trees. I had to see if it was him. If Roman and Randy had been caught, I knew Brock would kill them. Brock was furious at Roman for shooting him and us getting away in the plane. I was sure he was just as angry that he was protecting me from him. That was reason enough that he would make my precious man suffer.
My heart leapt in my throat as I heard sounds closer to me and I ducked down, my hands clutching the tree trunk in front of me as I curled up as small as I could. I heard more shuffling, and I stayed low and held my breath, not daring to move. I could still hear the shouts and fighting and groans of the men nearby and I started shaking, feeling tears slipping silently down my cheeks.
The next second I felt a hand over my mouth as I screamed and fought the other hand of the person holding me. My scream must have been muffled enough by their hand because none of the cons further away looked up.
I continued to fight and scratch and hit the person holding me until I heard his voice.
"Sara," he gasped out the second before I elbowed him in the chest. His hand fell away from my mouth, and I heard a deep muffled groan as his arms curled over his torso, like his ribs hurt from my punching.
"Roman?" I whispered, pulling the man's head up from the ground and his hair fell away from his face. I saw those beautiful dark gray eyes looking up at me. And without thinking of anything else I threw myself in his arms.
I felt him hug me tight, his arms around me as we lay huddled on the ground and from the corner of my eye, I saw Randy sneaking closer. They were both okay. Thank God.
"Sara," he breathed out again and sat up more, burying his head in my neck.
I heard him groan again and I jumped back. "I'm sorry. I was so scared. I thought you were one of them."
Roman grimaced and I saw him clenching his teeth as he smiled back at me. "I'm okay. I'll live. But you got me good." He groaned again. "I wasn't even thinking of you fighting back. I just saw you and was terrified that one of the monsters could have seen you before I could get to you. I'm fine as long as you are in my arms." He bent and brushed his lips over my cheek.
"No, you are not," I whispered as quiet as I could to him. "I hurt you. I think my elbow went right against your bruised ribs baby."
Roman nodded at me and judging by his expression that was exactly what happened. He was biting his lip in pain. But he grabbed for my arm before I could examine his injuries more. "Not now. I need to get you out of here Beauty. Brock is right there in the middle of that circle."
I looked up in his eyes and he nodded to me.
"He thinks we didn't drown Sara. He is looking for you. He is fixated on taking you away from me." Roman pulled me closer and deeper into his arms as he leaned against the tree and didn't groan at all from my body pressed against his sore ribs.
I just melted into his embrace and closed my eyes for a moment as I felt him kiss my forehead. "I'm your's baby. I promise you," I tried to reassure him.
Then I remembered what I needed to tell them. I lifted my head from the warmth of his body. "Roman, Randy, Becky is okay. She found her way back to the cave. That was when I knew I needed to find you."
I saw Randy breathe a sigh of relief and shut his eyes, his body falling back to lean on the tree behind him. He wiped his head with his tattooed arm and leaned on his knees.
Roman smiled and nodded to me. "That is good news. We need to get you out of here now Sara. It is way too dangerous with the inmates so close."
I started to get up and held my hand out for Roman to help him to his feet too when I heard loud cheering and hooting. I looked back toward the beach in time to see a man grabbing for another man's torso, his arms around him.
What was going on? The next second I heard a loud crack and the man fell in an unnatural heap on the sand. His back was broken! Oh God! The other man killed him?!
I buried my face in Roman's chest and his arms were around me instantly. "I'm sorry you had to see that. The bastards were having a fight to the death. We saw the whole thing till you sneaking around the edge of the beach caught my eye."
He kissed the top of my head. "Thank God no one else saw you but we need to get you the hell out of here."
I nodded. This was way too close to way too many of the cons and I could not have agreed more.
