Chapter 15: Rip of the Bandaid

"So, how do we do this?" Derek asked as he leaned against the car, watching as Meredith unbuckled Carwyn from her booster seat in the back.

"Do what?" Meredith didn't turn to face her fiancé; instead, she busily gathered her own large bag, Carwyn's Hello Kitty backpack, and lunch box.

"Do this." Derek answered, taking the heavy bag from Meredith and throwing it over his own shoulder. "You know… you're wearing a ring now, my ring. I just wasn't sure if you still wanted to keep us a secret or if we should make an announcement. It's up to you."

Meredith stopped and furrowed her brows in contemplation. Her internship was coming to an end. She had about three weeks left until she officially began her residency. She figured there was already enough speculation and gossip going on around them, that it'd be best to come clean. Quit hiding her past and publicize their planned future together. What did they have to lose?

"I say… we come clean. Rip the bandaid off… no anesthesia." Meredith nodded firmly to herself, satisfied with the decision, and began towards the hospital entrance, Carwyn's small hand protectively in her own.

Derek shook his head and quickly fell in step beside his girls. "No anesthesia? Is it really that painful to admit in out in the open that you're madly in love with me?"

Meredith whipped her head around to explain what she had meant, but stopped when she saw Derek had an amused look on his face.

She rolled her eyes and shook her head. "You're hopeless."

Derek didn't disagree as he took Meredith's free hand in his and all three of them strolled into the hospital together for the first time, as a family.


Meredith found herself standing by the nurse's station later that morning, going over some charts for a pediatric heart patient with both Cristina and Izzie. The halls were busy and most of her fellow interns stood mere feet away, discussing patients of their own. Meredith had kept her left hand in her pocket most of the morning, still figuring out the best way to break the news to her best friends.

Meredith absentmindedly stifled a yawn with her hand and before she'd realized which one, she'd used, she heard a shriek from the blond pediatric surgeon.

"Meredith! What the hell is that on your finger?!"

Meredith's eyes went wide. She tried to recall the words she'd been rehearsing in her mind all morning, but the sudden attention of everyone around them unexpectedly made her nervous.

"Oh… it's …uh… well…" She had planned on telling Cristina and Izzie separate, but with everyone's eyes on her, she decided to go for it. "Derek and I are getting married."

She heard a few gasps behind her but kept her attention on the two women directly in front of her. Izzie's face immediately registered delight, while Cristina's remained unreadable.

"Uh, Mer?" Cristina whispered under her breath so only Meredith and Izzie heard. "You do realize that everyone's listening, right?"

Meredith smiled. "It's okay. We decided to make our relationship public. No more secrets… about anything."

The sound of more than a couple pagers beepers interrupted their moment. Cristina glanced down at hers and frowned. She looked back up at Meredith and her features immediately grew softer.

"Good. I was tired of trying to remember who knew what and who didn't." Cristina placed a hand on Meredith's shoulder and squeezed it, the closest she let herself come to a hug. "Congratulations. You deserve to be happy."

Her voice was soft and sincere and both Izzie and Meredith looked on surprised as she started jogging down the hall, signaling for the other interns who still stood with mouths agape, to follow.


"Did you hear that skinny intern is engaged to the chief of surgery?"

"I heard she slept with him to get into the program…"

"I overheard one of the nurses say she was black mailing Dr. Yang and Dr. Stevens because she found out they performed an illegal autopsy their first year."

"Yeah, someone told me that she was in jail for five years, that's why she's behind."

"That's not what I heard, I heard she was in rehab for her crack addiction, personally I don't know what someone like Dr. Shepherd sees in her…"

"It's because of her mom. Rumor has it when Ellis Grey passed away, she left behind notes on how to cure Stroikanitus. Obviously, he knows she's his key to those notes and fame and fortune."

Meredith couldn't help but giggle at the last one. She'd heard the other's before, many times. Now, they were throwing her dead mother into the gossip. She found it amusing and pathetic. Deciding now was the perfect time to set the locker room full of interns straight, she stood from her hidden spot in the back of the room and joined the gossiping group.

"Do you want to sit here and try to outdo each other with the best made up story of Meredith Grey, or will the truth be just fine?"

The group of young doctors all gasped, and Meredith enjoyed watching as each of their faces drained of color, only to instantly turn shades of red. The girls looked down at their feet and most of the guys shrunk back against the locker, willing themselves to be invisible.

"How about the truth?" Meredith tried when no one spoke. A few heads nodded slowly so Meredith took a breath and begun.

She started from the very beginning. From the night she met Derek in a bar. She explained how she later found out he was her boss, but continued to date him. She didn't go into details about Addison, but explained how they broke up for a bit so Derek could get his own life in order. When she got to the part of her unplanned pregnancy and the ferry boat ride to Derek's that dark night long ago, she had everyone's undivided attention. Her audience couldn't help but think this was way better than any soap opera they had Tivo'd at home.

Meredith quickly went through her accident, being accidently pushed over the side of the ferry after an attempted mugging and waking up in a shelter surrounded by Armenian nuns in Canada with absolutely no memory. She briefly described how she had given birth to her daughter all alone with only strangers to help her and her journey back to the United States. She spoke of the miraculous circumstances of meeting someone with ties to Seattle Grace and how she ended up here after falling and hitting her head.

By the time she finished her story of her recovery and how Derek and Cristina had performed a lifesaving operation on her brain, enabling her to wake up with her complete memory intact, there was not a dry eye in the room. Meredith noticed even a few of the guys blinking fast and sniffling, trying to cover it up as a cough.

The silence echoed off the metal lockers and bare concrete floors until one of the interns Meredith had worked closest with sighed.

"Wow." Dr. Harris looked up, remorse filling her features. "I'm so sorry Meredith. I had no idea. You must really hate us and think we're a bunch of jerks."

"Not at all. Maybe I shouldn't have been so secretive about it. But what's done is done. I just hope this settles any outstanding questions of black mail or dead mother secret notes. None of that is true. So please don't believe everything you hear. Can you guys do that for me?"

They all nodded in unison; the others still too ashamed to speak.

"Good. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm eager to get changed and go pick up my daughter, it's been a long day."

With that the shocked interns finally stirred into motion. Shifts ended for most of the doctors, so rustling of belongings and clanking of the lockers filled the room as everyone moved to get ready to leave. Still, no one spoke. The amazing story of this woman that they shared a locker room with played over and over in each one's mind. Meredith gained the respect and admiration of each and every doctor in the small.


A small smile settled on Meredith's mouth as she made her way up to Derek's office. He picked Carwyn up from day care an hour earlier and Meredith was going to take her home from there so Derek could finish up some paperwork. Her day had been good, great even. She knew her friends would all be ecstatic about the news of her engagement. Addison had probably been the most enthused and already filled her pockets with cards of wedding planners, caterers, and banquet halls. She knew as long as she had Addison and Izzie, she wouldn't have to take care of any mundane details herself.

Meredith's smile also had part to do with the way things had played out in the locker room. Finally, the secrets were done and she knew she would not have to hear another word of criticism from her colleagues. A truce had finally been called.

"You headed home?" Cristina's voice brought Meredith from her thoughts as she rounded a corner.

"Yep, after I get Carwyn. You?"

Cristina shook her head. "Burke has some kind of professor banquet tonight, so I get to go dangle on his arm all night like a good girlfriend." Cristina rolled her eyes but kept her smile, showing she really didn't mind.

Meredith laughed as Cristina continued about some of the dead beats that usually attended the University dinners. She was doing her best to focus on a story Cristina was telling about an uncomfortable encounter with the dean of admissions wife, when an invasive stare down the hall behind Cristina caught her attention. Meredith shook off the unpleasant feeling Mr. Luckabee's locked eyes were giving her and moved her eyes back to her Korean friend.

Her gaze briefly left Cristina's face once more, and again, Mr. Luckabee's dark eyes were fixed on her. His lips slowly formed a grin, and cold deliberate smile that knocked the wind out of Meredith's lungs.

"Mer? Meredith? Hello?"

Meredith snapped her eyes back to the doctor in front of her.

"Are you listening to me? What's wrong?" Cristina widened her eyes in concern at the sudden panicked look Meredith held.

"Is he staring at me?" Meredith didn't move her lips and kept her eyes away from the man.

"What?" Cristina didn't follow.

"Is he staring at me?" Meredith repeated a little louder, but still didn't move her lips.

Cristina stared back blankly at Meredith like she was crazy.

Meredith still didn't let her eyes go back to Mr. Luckabee's eerie watch. "Behind you! Mr. Luckabee! Is he staring at me?" Meredith hissed, trying to keep her features unreadable and calm.

Cristina slowly turned and Meredith let her eyes follow as well. They were both met by the sight of Mr. Luckabee discussing a chart with Dr. Zeta. He seemed oblivious to anyone else in the hall.

Cristina turned back to her friend and gave her a strange look. "Are you sure you're okay Meredith?"

"Ya. Fine." Meredith sighed and watched as Cristina eyed her skeptically before heading on her way. She followed her friends form with her eyes as it vanished, before letting them turn back to the other two occupants of the hall.

Meredith's green eyes were suddenly met with the black ones of Mr. Luckabee, who now stood alone, and was no doubt staring at her. His grin was now gone, and a rough intimidating gaze took its place. Meredith shuttered involuntarily and turned on her heal; she focused on keeping her steps from a fearful run, as she hurried away towards Derek.

The thought crossed her mind that now was probably a good time to mention all the creepy things that were happening to her.