Chapter 16: Kiss
36 years before Encanto
The sky was overcast as Alma left the town meeting with Sofia Guzman, their arms linked. She glanced up at the grey sky with suspicion.
"It must be nice, knowing how your daughter is feeling at all times." Sofia commented, following Alma's gaze up to the sky. "You always know when she needs help."
Sofia stroked Alma's arm, but she didn't seem to be listening. Alma's brow was furrowed in concern as she searched the sky, recognising the different patterns of clouds and the way the wind moved through them.
Pepa was having a bad day. Again.
Dios, and they'd only just finished a meeting where everyone had been shouting at Alma about storms and prophecies. Alma put a hand to her face, slowly dragging it down in frustration.
"Here." Sofia smiled, taking her hand in hers. "It's okay."
Alma found herself spending most town meetings these days defending her children, promising that they were going to do better this time. It was humiliating, especially when Pepa and Bruno seemed determined to disappoint Alma and let her down every chance that they got.
"I think Arturo likes you, Alma." Sofia smiled, attempting to brighten her mood. "Have you seen the way he looks at you during the meetings?" She chuckled at the memory.
Alma didn't respond. Her eyes were still on the clouds. She needed to find Pepa, and stop the storm before it started. She could smell electricity in the air, a subtle sign that something big was coming.
"Would you go on a date if he asked you?" Sofia tried. "You wouldn't have to kiss him or anything, just. It might be nice for you, Alma."
Alma glanced at her friend, her expression strained. Was Sofia out of her mind? How was Alma supposed to give her heart to anyone, when she didn't even know where it was anymore? Alma's heart felt as if it'd been shattered into a million pieces, buried with her husband.
"What if we went for dinner together?" Sofia encouraged. "Gabriel and I could be there too-"
"No." Alma replied in a flat tone.
Sofia couldn't help but sigh as her friend hurried off. She worried for Alma.
Later
Alma searched, but her daughter must've been hiding because Pepa was nowhere to be seen. The weather took a turn for the worse, the storm soon growing into a fierce hurricane.
Miercoles. Alma covered her face in her hands. It just wasn't fair. It felt like Alma was trying so hard, but it didn't matter. It felt as if Alma was as if she were destined to be a bad mother who couldn't control her children, no matter what she did.
The longer she searched, the worse the hurricane became. Wind ripped through houses and lightning struck the streets, causing debris to go flying, and people running and screaming.
Alma froze, her chest becoming tight and heart pounding fast as her mind flashed back to that town with Pedro, bombs going off in the streets as they ran.
Someone rode over on horseback and Alma screamed, collapsing to the ground. The horse stopped in front of her and a villager held out a hand for her to climb on. She looked up to see Arturo.
"Come on, Señora!" He encouraged. "It's dangerous. Let me help you."
Alma shook her head, shoulders tense as she got back to her feet. She felt embarrassed for showing fear in front of him, so made up for it with a stern expression and level voice.
"Find my daughter." She instructed Arturo, then continued to search.
"Alma!"
She turned to see Maria Guzman, her crutches shaky and movements stiff and slow as she tried to get to safety. She looked over at Alma with pleadingly eyes as the wind blew at her, knocking her down.
Alma rushed over, crouching down to check her.
"I can't find Mami." Maria whispered, wincing from the fall.
"Let's get you home." Alma reassured Maria, putting arms around her to lift her up.
Alma encouraged the young girl to wrap arms around her shoulders and lay over her back as Alma stood up. Alma lifted Maria's legs to her waist, then heard her whimper in pain, hiding her face against Alma.
"Sorry." Alma let go of Maria's legs and let them hang limp instead, holding tight to her arms instead.
Alma carried Maria through the wind and chaos, breathing heavy as all she could think of was Pedro carrying her like this through the war. Debris flew and Alma turned, taking the impact to protect Maria. She gasped, the pain making the past blur into reality. It flashed before her eyes, black stormclouds warping into red clouds of smoke, thunder becoming explosions as she carried Maria home, pushing through her fear to protect her.
Later
Thunder echoed through the Encanto, lighting up the mountains as Pepa and Bruno ran home together, townsfolk shouting and chasing after them as they reached Casita.
They slammed the front door behind them, panting and dripping water onto the tiles. Casita tossed towels over their shoulders, closing its shutters to protect them.
"Lay down here." Bruno encouraged, helping his sister into the foyer. "I'll see if there's food."
They didn't make it far before the door opened again.
"Pepa!"
Pepa flinched at Mama's sharp tone and the slam of the door behind her. They turned to see Alma, soaked and shaking as she came inside. Her breath was heavy, something Mama did when memories were clouding her head.
Bruno held onto Pepa protectively, watching with frightened eyes as a furious Alma approached.
Pepa gathered up courage and stood in front of Bruno, chest puffed as she glared defiantly at Mama. It was something she'd started to do as a teenager, and Alma found it infuriating.
"What did you do?" Alma demanded, still shaken and panicked from the storm.
Pepa frowned, wind blowing at her hair as it spiralled her. "I didn't do anything!"
"Is that a hurricane?" Alma pointed a finger to the front door.
Pepa nodded with a scowl, determined not to show that she was afraid. The angrier she got at Mamá, the more brave she felt.
"Why, Pepa?" Alma cried, hands covering her face in stress. "Why? Why must you always make everything so hard for me?"
"It's not my fault!" Pepa shouted, throwing a hand. "I'm trying!"
"You are not!" Alma shouted back. "Look at what you are doing! Look at our town, look at our community!"
Villagers clamoured outside, banging on the door and calling for help.
Pepa flinched, momentarily losing her bravado. She reached to the side for Bruno's hand and felt him take it. She took a deep breath, regathering her strong exterior.
Alma glanced at the door too, knowing she needed to fix this now, else the children be ostracised again. Alma felt so panicked. She didn't know how many chances they had left with the village. It felt like they'd already worn out every last fibre of patience that could be possible.
"Get rid of it." Alma instructed, turning back to Pepa. "Clear skies. Right now."
"I can't!" Pepa frowned, and Alma grabbed her wrist. Alma hated this new attitude.
Thunder crashed at Mama's touch, Pepa's expression becoming furious as lightning flashed between them.
"You are hurting people!" Alma scolded. "You are causing damage to this town, making memories they will never be able to unlive. Terrible things-"
"I told you!" Pepa snatched her hand back. "I'm trying-"
"If you were trying, then this would not be happening, Pepa!" Alma shouted, finger pointing in her daughter's face as familiar rage rose to the surface. "Why are you like this? Why? Why can't you be good, just once?"
Pepa covered her mouth, eyes gleaming with hurt. She may have started building up a hard shell like Alma, but under it she wasn't hard like Mama at all. Her heart was soft like her Papi, and the words hit hard.
"You disappoint me." Alma told her, and her daughter's defiant look dropped.
Pepa's brave exterior cracked and she shuddered, closing her eyes and wrapping arms around herself. A snow cloud appeared over her head, thick snow falling over her shoulders.
"You see?" Alma gestured up to it, breathless and blinded by panic. "And now you have a cloud."
Casita's tiled clattered to get Alma to stop. The tiles under her feet tilted, nudging her.
Villagers continued to bang at the front door while Pepa sobbed. She let go of Bruno so she could press hands into her face, feeling overwhelmed.
Alma turned to the door. Dios, they were going to chase them out of town. It was only a matter of time until they'd had enough. Alma could not let that happen.
"Clear skies, Pepa!" Alma urged. "Right now."
Pepa reached a shaking hand to her braid, trying to make the words. Everything just felt so heavy and hopeless, like all she wanted to do was hide in bed and never come out.
"Pepa!" Alma urged, the banging on the door making her panic. "Please. Fix it."
Pepa dropped to the ground, sobbing in stress. Around them the wind became sharp and fast, ice spreading along the room as lightning flashed.
Casita nudged Alma again, urging her to stop. Bruno looked frightened, but then he put his hood on and Hernando was there, and Hernando was scared of nothing.
"Stop!" Hernando exclaimed, throwing himself over his sister to shield her. "Unhand her, you monster!"
The phrase hit Alma off guard. She took a sharp breath, suddenly very aware of how her children were seeing her. She stared down at the lanky little teen that crouched over his crying sister, and suddenly saw herself for what she was.
Alma took a shaky breath, her heart sinking as she suddenly saw herself standing where her own Mama had once stood. She covered her mouth with her hand, feeling trapped in an impossible situation.
Dios, no.
Hernando took off the hood, and Bruno was back. He looked up at Mamá with tears in his eyes, his croaky voice cracking a little. "Please, Mama! You're hurting her! Can't you see how much you're hurting her?"
Alma hesitated, her expression soft as she looked down at her daughter.
Pepa was curled up on the ground, tense fingers digging into her scalp as she cried. Bruno quickly pulled his hood back up so he could be Hernando again to help her. When he did that, it felt like everything was just a story, and he was the main character. A good guy, a hero. Bruno could hide in his mind and be safe, while Hernando fixed things. Hernando muttered under his breath to Bruno and Pepa, quietly comforting them both.
Alma reached for Pepa but she flinched away, curling up close to her brother and sobbing against him.
"Something's wrong with her." Bruno told Alma, taking his hood back off as he stroked his sister's back. "She's sick, Mama. That's why there's a storm."
The front door unlocked and swung open. They all flinched, then relaxed as they saw it was only Julieta. She closed the door behind her, bringing a quiet and calm confidence into the room.
"They're gone." Julieta reassured her family, before coming over to her sister. "They were injured from the storm, and were just banging at the door because they wanted to find me for healing. They're okay now."
Julieta knelt down and held a hand to Pepa's sweating forehead, her other hand gently wiping snow from her back. Julieta leaned down, concerned eyes searching Pepa's.
"She's sick." Bruno said again, urging Julieta to help.
Julieta nodded in understanding, stroking her sister's fringe from her forehead while Bruno flapped hands at the snowing cloud above her.
"Where's it hurting?" Julieta asked softly.
Pepa sobbed, eyes still closed and fingers digging into her head. Julieta carefully took Pepa's hands away, holding them in hers.
"Is it your chest?" Julieta stroked her face. "Is your heart hurting?"
Pepa sobbed again. Her heart did hurt, but that wasn't because she was sick. That was because of Mamá's words.
"She's bleeding." Bruno told Julieta, gesturing to his sister's legs. Blood slowly ran down them, leaking onto her dress and forming a little puddle over the tiles.
It took Julieta by surprise, but she remained calm.
"Did somebody hurt you?" Julieta asked gently, taking an arepa from her bag.
"No, it happened on its own." Bruno explained.
Alma's breath caught, because suddenly she understood what was happening. Alma hadn't told them about it yet, but of course her daughters had reached the age where they would start bleeding.
She felt her cheeks burn up with shame. Dios, it was supposed to be her job to tell them that. Alma hadn't even thought about it. She'd been so busy with everything else, and in her eyes they were still children.
Pepa sobbed as Julieta gathered her into her arms.
"I've got you." Julieta supported her sister's head to her shoulder as Pepa ate the arepa. "It's okay... It'll be okay, Pepi. I know it hurts. It's going feel better in a second."
Alma took a heavy breath.
"Let's take Pepa to her room." Alma instructed.
"Wait, Mama." Julieta continued to stroke her sister's hair. "Let her heal first."
"It won't heal." Alma sighed. "Because she's not hurt."
Thunder crashed as Pepa hid her face against Julieta and cried. She hated when Mama did this. Alma would tell Pepa what she should be feeling, as if her words could change her heart.
"It does hurt!" Pepa insisted, frowning you at her. "I'm not lying, Mama."
"I know." Alma sighed. "But it's normal."
Alma held her breath as she saw confused faces turn to her.
"Let's go to your room, Pepa." Alma sighed. "I'll make Chocolate Santafereño for you. And then I'll explain it to you all."
Later
"So we will bleed every month?" Julieta asked, she and Bruno cuddling Pepa while she drank her hot chocolate.
Alma sat on the other side of the bed, hands clasped over her cup as she nodded, attempting to explain the birds and the bees to them.
Dios, they were 14. Surely this had come up before? Their friends? Hm... Maybe not. The triplets spent a lot of time with Agustin Rojas, and he was younger and even more innocent then they were.
"I thought babies come from the candle." Bruno pointed out. "Remember? You pray for the magic to put them in a mama's tummy."
Casita's windowsill shook with laughter, while Alma shot it a look.
"Well, I said that because you weren't ready for the truth." Alma sighed. "But I guess now you are... So, the papà puts the baby in the mama."
"How?" Bruno asked, then suddenly his eyes turned green.
"Don't!" Alma tried to cover his eyes, but it was too late. Bruno gasped.
"What did you see?" Julieta asked, holding Pepa as she watched with curious eyes.
Bruno was quiet, blinking a couple times in shock.
"Brunito?" Pepa prompted, and he shook his head.
"A man and a lady." Bruno frowned. "They started kissing eachother, but not a normal kiss. They used their tongues."
"Ew." Pepa muttered, while Julieta just frowned in disapproval.
"And then..." Bruno voice trailed off, eyes wide.
"It's, ah, like a dance." Alma attempted, then groaned at herself. "No, not that. More like cuddling, but, ah, different." Alma felt her face burning up in embarrassment.
Dios, she was in over her head.