Hello everyone. Wow! It's been so long since I updated… I hope everyone had a nice spring and summer. Meanwhile I have some updates about stories.
I have finished several Oneshots. One for Tracy Beaker, one for glee and two for Harry Potter. But one of them for Harry Potter is in Swedish so most people reading this won't have to care about that.
I also finished a story I wrote for Epilepsy awareness that was called "Game on!" So that's another story finished all of those that have ben closed to finishing…
A bit ago I was talking to my mum about writing for Epilepsy awareness, I wanted to start a new one and write something for a new fandom. And I told her that when I started writing I never had a plan with what I was writing, I was always "I want to write this and this and this" and never had a plan. Which is why I ended up with random, long stories. Nowadays when I start new stories I always have a plan… So then, I started another story for awareness which is written for Virgin River and is called "I could hate it as much as I want (but that wouldn't make it go away)".
Also, September 16th was four years seizure free- YAY! And I had another idea of something to write, that was a story for Cobra Kai and is called "Leaving the past behind to make room for the future"
So with new stories and stories I have finished. I have nine stories finished and five that are almost finished. I also have this one and how they ended up in care that are nowhere near finished.
And, I guess that's it. I'm sorry I left such a cliffhanger and then didn't update for months. But here it is, finally.
"MUM, DAD… LEX? JONAH?... ANYONE?"
I was running down the street, not far away from where I lived but I didn't know these streets well enough. I didn't know in what direction I should go.
"ARIEL?"
I was trying to carry my white, furry friend with me. But she had grown so much since we saw her the first time. And she was getting so heavy. Too heavy for me to carry and keep running towards a goal in which direction I didn't know.
"HELP ME."
However much I yelled there wasn't anyone who heard me.
"HELP…"
And it was just all made even worse when suddenly the skies opened and it was pouring down. That was strange. Just a second ago the sun had been shining in my eyes but now.
"HELP ME…. YOU NEED TO…"
And then, suddenly my eyes flew open while I gasped and woke up.
For just a second I couldn't get what had happened or where I was. And I couldn't get why my whole body- my brain and my heart most of all. Or where the rain in the dream come from.
Then I suddenly remembered, I realized everything at once. And also realized that the rain had come when Ariel had started licking my face over and over again. That was when I remembered the vet had told me that if she started moving and sitting up before the morning came it would most likely be a sign she was going to get better.
And Ariel was now sitting up as much as she could have for the moment and licking my face as she did any other day.
"Yes! Yes! DOCTOR…" I pressed a red button on the wall. "That's it. That's a good girl." I couldn't help the tears that came streaming down my cheeks with joy and relief. "That's a good girl…" I could hear it as the vet came jogging down the hallway and then came into the stall where I sat on the concrete floor and he kneeled right by Ariel who hadn't moved from my side.
"That's a good girl." He agreed with me, and while I barely saw what he was doing he checked something. And then something more, and then something more while I was too drowsy to even get what kinds of reactions he was wanting to get. "for you…" He spoke to Ari as if she could understand. "I think you should lie down to heal. Because there is no doubt in my mind that you will be home before the end of this week… and for you…" He turned towards me. "I think you should find somewhere softer and nicer to fall asleep. You need to rest too."
"No…" I grabbed onto Ariel's fur as hard as I possibly could have. "I'm staying with Ariel. I'm staying here…."
"Well…" The vet checked something more. "I don't think there's anymore for me to do here. Everything we can do right now is wait. But I think she's out of danger now…" He patted my shoulder. "But I still think you should get more sleep." He left again, I hadn't let go of what I could touch of Ariel's fur while I moved over so, while tears still streaming down my cheeks I could tiredly lean against the wall. But whether it was because of actual fatigue or just relief I did not know, I fell back asleep.
"Leah… Leah…"
It didn't feel as anything more than a few seconds had passed. But something more must have because when I opened my eyes the next time it was light outside the window and from somewhere I couldn't see I could hear people talking.
"Go away…"
"Leah…" It was mum's voice and she was shaking my shoulder. "You have to wake up now. You'll already late for school…"
"I don't care for school today…" I moaned and as good as felt that if my glare could have hurt my mum there wouldn't have been much left of her. "And I think you must underst…" She handed me a box from the electricity store in town. "What is this?"
"After what happened yesterday… well, teenagers can't get long without their phones nowadays so I went to get you a new one as soon as the store opened… take it." I glared even worse, practically feeling how my glare turned even worse.
I wasn't so certain whether it had started the night Jonah died, or maybe it had always been like this that mum had just never seemed to care much about what was important to me. Just as long as things ended up where she wanted them…
Just as long as it looked right in front of the faces and impressed others.
"I'm not going… What time is it anyway?"
"Lunch time so you've already missed a couple of hours. I don't want you to miss anymore. I thought you said you had an important English test today? Wasn't it after lunch?"
"You have got to be kidding me! What do I care about a stupid English test? I didn't care for it earlier so I especially do not care for it now. And I'm staying right here. Thanks for the phone." I laid it by my side but without even looking at it. "I can't… I can't leave her… I can't leave her now." Ariel lifted her head, then growled slightly in well-being before he laid her head back down again. "Hear? I think she's saying she wants me to say."
"Really?" Mum was sounding more and more frustrated. "….I thought it sounded like you should go. I know you'd rather stay here with Ariel. But there's nothing you can do here and we now know she's going to make it. Dad will be taking the day off work and stay here with her. And if something happens- but it won't. He will call you right away…"
But Ariel was still hurt, and I could still see in front of mee how that burglar had kicked and kicked and kicked…
"But…"
"No more buts Leah!" I knew that tone in mum's voice- she wasn't going to take more protesting. "I know you'd rather stay here with Ariel. But school is school and you have to go there. If we still weren't sure if Ariel was going to make it, it would have been another thing. But we now know and there's nothing you can do here."
If glares could kill there wouldn't be much left of my mum. But at last I snuggled as close to Ariel's white, thick fur as I possibly could, took the phone mum had given me, got up from the concrete floor and stomped past her. I could hear her sighing when I had passed but I wasn't about to show her anything of what I was feeling as I held my head high and refused to sulk.
After a quick stop at home to shower and change clothes I logged into my new phone and at first I was about to send a message out to our New Directions' text group. But barely had I had the time to start writing it I was reminded that all of my contacts were gone…
I didn't know much about what friends in the glee club was on their Facebook or not. But the only way I could see when I walked up to the school only a few minutes late, I logged in and wrote a message in the Facebook group for everyone.
Can you lot meet me in the choir room during lunch break today?
Like I'd already thought, I didn't have a clue about what friends of mine even went on their own Facebook pages, and would see my message or not. I didn't even have the time to meet Lex before lunch and coming into the choir room I had to say I was surprised when I saw exactly everyone there. Including Mr. Schue.
"LEAH!"
Barely did I have the time to come inside the doors of the choir room before Lex leaped out of her seat and came running up to me and embraced me.
"Are you okay? I haven't told the others about what happened. I thought you might want to do that yourself. But maybe I was wrong and you would like me to tell them. It is okay whatever way you want- I just want to do what feels the best for you." I nodded tiredly. "Should I go and sit back down and then wait quietly while you tell?" I nodded. "Sorry…" She went back to sit in between Tyler and my currently empty seat while I tried to find the right way to explain.
I had a feeling I would be telling this story many times. But as soon as I tried to find a way to explain, all the scenes from yesterday was playing over again and again and again.
"Yesterday…" I started at last. "…While I was out on a walk with Ariel we met…" I had to take a break and take a deep breath. "…we met a burglar… Ari kept… she just kept barking and barking and barking standing in between us, she wanted to protect me. But then he started kicking her, and kicked and he just kept kicking until she just laid bleeding towards the asphalt."
I wouldn't think New Directions had ever been so silent as right then.
"…We went to the vet's with her…" Every word had to be squeezed out through my dry throat. "…She had to have surgery. The vet says that if she will… be able to live… she should be trying to sit by the time the morning comes. Then she'll probably be fine. But if she doesn't try then… then… then…"
I had probably never experienced the New Directions as quiet as they were right now, everyone seemed shaken by what I told them about what happened yesterday. Well, that was everyone except for Teeghan whom as usual didn't look as if she cared about anything I said while I just had to continue. "…I think pets… Dogs, cats, horses- any pets. They end up parts of our families, I've wanted a dog for as long as I can remember. Yet I could never have known that Ariel was what I was waiting for all along… So…" I looked over the group. "…I just started thinking that I don't know much about yours- what do you come home to… What are your pets really? Lex… you have Ned the hamster but anyone else…"
"Sure I have." Lex answered. "And most people in here helped getting him for me. So I named him Ned for him to be the New Directions' mascot… But I think you're right Leah… those pets end up meaning more to us than we ever could have guessed they would…"
Hadn't we all heard about those?
It was all silent for a little bit, then all of a sudden Amy was the first one who told us others about her familys's pets.
"My parents weren't happy with me and all of my siblings. We are five, and all of us have brown or red hair. So then we have a theme with red, orange and brown. We have an aquarium full of goldfish. And about once every five years we have another Nova Scotia Duck Tolling retrievers with names that means something with Red. Earlier we used to have Blaze, Rowan, Phoenix and Garnet. Right now we have Redford who is five and Ginger who is three months." It was only quiet for a few seconds. "Now I'm curious too. I know you Marcie has some, and Leah and Lex. But that's it." Marcie nodded slightly.
"I have a horse. He'sa Swedish half-blood, actual name Hughton's Herrey but we call him Hugo. We also have Donnie the donkey to keep him company… And I know for a fact you, Sean have a horse…"
"Uh- huh" Sean answered. "A horse named Teddy… My dad gave him to me when he was just a foal so he's… getting older. But I can still do a lot of competing and riding and he seems to be able to go on way longer than me without wearing himself out."
"You guys have been together for a long time then?" Mr. Schue half asked half said, just as I realized the same about when Sean's dad was killed in world trade center and Sean nodded. "And not only through time…" Sean nodded again and laid a hand over his heart. Then his expression changed, he dropped his hand back down and looked around and was obviously not willing to talk about himself anymore.
"We have a cat." Moa told us. "It was a bit of Nils's way to learn English words. Kitten was the first. We wanted for her to have a Swedish name but it has to be possible for anyone else here to say as well… her name is Milla… Am I the only one with a cat? It's really one of the most pets. At least in Sweden."
"My family has two cats." Caroline answered. "Mitzi and Keri. Then I have a dog on my own and her name is Diamond… she's a mix in between maltese and Yorkshire Terrier and Papillon…" It was only quiet for a little while before there came suddenly a question from Aiden.
"I don't have any pet. But now there are dogs, cats and horses. And a hamster. Aren't there anyone who has a pet of a more… special… cool kind."
"I have a gecko" Ben answered. "It's blue with orange spots. Its name is Sid. When I got him I thought he looked like his name was Sid… more lizards to the people."
"I have two lizards." Johnny said. "But my lizards are two iguanas and my snake is a ball python. I also have a sister."
"Hmm." I remembered his sister as a freshman. "I think I know who she is… What does she think about your pets?"
"Oh, Jessy doesn't care for them a single bit…" Johnny laughed shortly pointed with his thumb to the side and Alice. "It's my girlfriend that has a problem. She hasn't dared to come home to mine since she stepped into my room and… ow!" Alice boxed his arm.
"You didn't even tell me what would meet me when I stepped into your room and about that Snakeward or whatever his name is."
"Not Snakeward, that would be a stupid name!"
"And his real name isn't?"
"I was eight when I got and named him… and his name is Snakey McSnake for everyone's information. And the lizards are named Keith and…" He stopped in the middle of a sentence and we all saw it when Alice sent him a meaning look. Johnny sighed deeply before he finished. "…Greenie."
There were some laughter's spread among the others. And even though I couldn't quite laugh with the others I had to shake my head at Johnny, who was obviously embarrassed of the names he had given his pets.
And the thought struck me by, even if it was at first only passing by for a second was how much I really loved all of these guys. And how much we all- I, Lex, Tyler, Johnny and all others. Even Teeghan just fit into the mix.
It might be for a fact that I would never get Jonah back, but I had these so I would make it quite okay anyway.
At last, when I realized it was with Johnny everyone who had pets had spoken, I breathed in.
"I've wanted a dog for as long as I can ren remember… and until this year, for my birthday I knew that some time I will have one. So I kept, riffling in books and on every page of the internet and I wondered what on earth what kind of dog I would ever get. Maybe a big or a small, one with short fur or long, maybe a mix like yours Caroline. Now when I see a dog I'm like that's a poodle, that's a Labrador, that's a Bichon Frisé and so it goes. I don't see anything wrong with any other kind of pets I just… I just never knew that when I finally got a dog of my own. It would be Ariel, whom I love so much. And she would obviously do anything for me as well, she's the best and she proved it for anyone else to see yesterday… Now, tonight I started singing a song I haven't even been thinking about for years. But it seems perfect for this theme and since tonight, I sang it acapella then I'd like to do the same here." No one answered me, so at last I breathed in deeply and then sang.
Anywhere you are, I am near…
By the time I was finished There were more than one pair of eyes had teared up.
"I love that song." Lex suddenly exclaimed and I was on my way to answer before she continued. "That was why last year, we sang it to a girl named Hayley. She needed it right then. And say what you want. I think tonight Ariel must have understood what you sang to her. The feeling if nothing else… And that's what pets are- no matter if they are dogs, horses, lizards or even a big, large snake. They are our best friends- our chosen family." Lex stood up and came over to me, for a little bit we only stood there, looking at each other and I didn't quite understand what she had wanted to do. Then she wrapped her arms around me, I started sobbing while the pictures of what had happened yesterday played for my inner vision.
Would they ever leave me alone now?
"It's okay…" Lex barely more than whispered and stroke my back. "It will be okay. Ariel's strong… Just as strong as you are and she will be okay." For a long while we only stood there, as if it was a dream or something far away I heard the others leave as if they didn't mean a thing- yet I and Lex just held on as if our own lives depending on it.
Until I, finally able to breathe without sobbing took a step back and checked my phone- nothing!
"Has she called?"
"No!" I answered Lex's question but couldn't drop the thought that she might think I should focus on school and not call. "I- just. I don't know. Still I think that if something would have changed at the vet's today my mum would have called me… anyway, I keep going back to what happened and seeing in front of me how that guy kicked and kicked and kicked her until she only laid sprawled on the asphalt and I thought she was dead."
Sometimes I just hated having a photographic memory, I was quite sure that sight would stay on the inside of my eyelids for the rest of my life. How all of her legs and paws seem to be able to point in each direction, how a pool of blood was forming beneath her, how she hadn't reacted when I just tried to wake her up.
And then… the several hours I had spent waiting and waiting and waiting…
It felt like a thousand hours of waiting,
And it kept on feeling like hours for every minute we were apart. Or until the moment I would be able to take Ariel home with me.
"Something I've been thinking about…" When Lex started talking she interrupted my thoughts. "I heard that people don't think pets- living animals don't make good gifts… I beg to differ. Except for that family I'm now a part of and everything. I'm pretty sure giving me Ned was the exact right thing at the exact right time. They took care of me and I had something to take care of myself."
"I can still see what they mean. If they give someone a pet and they end up not even being cared about by a child or a partner that promised they would care…"
"I get what they mean. I just say that I'm so tired of people saying what is right and what is wrong. Even though sometimes, like with giving someone a pet. There is someone more that has to be cared for for it…. I mean, if someone gets a puppy or a kitten etc. As a gift, what if they will actually care for it. Because they have wished for one and figured what it will take to have one—like you!"
"And still, you can't quite help to scroll through and read those Facebook and YouTube comments."
Only because I knew how correct that last thing I answered was I just couldn't help but laugh. And Lex couldn't help but laugh with me while we stopped outside Miss Frog's classroom.
"Ariel's strong." She told me one more time. "Just as strong as her owner." I smiled slightly, and couldn't help but say one thing.
"Thank you Lex… You're a great friend too. And I hope you know that."
Playlist
Leah: what are words- Chris Medina
Random fact
I have pictures of all pets. They're a mix of x snow-pony x's dog and cats, my family friends' dogs, pictures and the donkey from Shrek. Then also pictures from Google…. I can't remember what those pictures are called… if I got them all mentioned but if not then here's a list.
Chasmir the Pyrenean mountain dog (Ariel in the story) belongs to a family friends'
Diamond the Maltese Yorkillon belongs to x snow- pony x
Donnie the donkey looks like the donkey in Shrek
An Aquarium of goldfish is a picture from Google
Kelly the Nova Scotia Duck Tolling retriever (Ginger in the story), a family friends'
Greenie the iguana- A picture from Google
Hugo the Swedish Warmblood- a picture from Google
Keith the iguana- A picture from Google
Milla the cat- a picture from Google
Mitzi and Keri the cats belongs to X snow-pony x.
Ned the hamster- a picture from Google
Ozzy the Nova Scotia Duck Tolling Retriever (Redford in the story)- a family friends'
Sid the gecko- A picture from Google
Snakey McSnake the ball python- a picture from Google
Teddy the Friesian horse- A picture from Google
I don't know if those pictures are the exact right kinds of horses etc. So they might be different kinds in the story than on the pictures. But well, they look right anyway.
Pictures of all pets will be up on my Instagram "Linneagbfanfiction"