Chapter Thirty-Three

Melancholy was not a good look for her.

Sam bit her lip as she watched Vala from the Mess Hall line. It was always a little disturbing when the exuberant woman suddenly became…well, not exuberant. It only happened about twice to her knowledge, but this was the worst it's ever been. This time it was due to Daniel, and he wasn't here to make it better. He was always the one who cheered her up. He was the one to help her through whatever crap it was. Yes, he may have enlisted the help of SG-1 and the General, but he still knew what to do – knew what she needed.

He knew her.

Sam grabbed her tray and joined her. "Hey," she greeted softly. She wasn't sure where the woman was at and wanted to be on the cautious side. "Mind if I join?"

Vala was clearly in a daze and hadn't seen Sam approach. Hell, she barely touched her own food. "You're already sitting."

"I'd still leave if you wanted me to." It would sting a little, but she would.

Vala's lip lifted in a small smile. "You're already here. Might as well stay."

"Gee, thanks," Sam responded sarcastically in hopes it would elicit another smile. She was pleased with herself when it did.

Vala picked up her fork and began poking at her food. "I noticed that your father is back," she speared a piece of fruit before eating.

Sam nodded and swallowed her own bite. "Yeah, he took a quick trip to see my brother and his kids and got back today."

Vala hummed thoughtfully as she chewed a grape. "So, what's he still doing here? Not that I don't like having him around. I'm just curious."

Sam studied her for a second. She actually meant that. "He, uhh…he asked to meet Pete," she hesitantly admitted, feeling uncomfortable at bringing him up. It still stung that she hadn't known about the background check.

Vala stared at her oddly. "That's a good thing, right? Meet the parents before the wedding?" she questioned but didn't wait for an answer before she continued. "So, why don't you look happy? Shouldn't you want your father to meet the man you're marrying?"

"Pete and I broke up," Sam rushed out and suddenly felt a weight being lifted.

She kept it to herself for a while now. She hadn't wanted anyone to know. She was embarrassed at the fact they all knew about Pete crossing the line. She berated herself for not seeing it – well, actually for ignoring it. Sam always viewed his showing up at Daniel's house during the Osiris capture as a spur of the moment decision – or at least that's what she told herself. It wasn't until Vala had said the word 'stalker' that had begun to see what the rest probably saw and knew already. How could she have been so blind to it? Better yet, why did she deliberately ignore it? Since it all came to light, she realized that she couldn't marry Pete, for more reasons than one.

She forgave Pete. He made a mistake, one that he seemed to regret, and she could forgive him. That wasn't why she broke it off. No, it was because it wouldn't be fair to either of them. Sam couldn't and wouldn't love him in the way he deserved. It wouldn't work in the long run either. As much as she tried to deny and hide them, the feelings she had for another would always supersede any feelings she could ever develop for someone else. Pete also didn't understand her. He didn't get how much she loved her job, despite the long hours. He never knew when to let her be or when it was time to pull her away from work – unlike someone else… Their marriage would've ended in disaster and heartache.

She had no regrets, aside from hurting Pete. But it had been a necessary evil.

"Samantha, I'm so sorry," Vala's gentle voice pulled her from her inner ramblings. "I hope I didn't play a part in that."

Sam was already shaking her head. "You didn't," she tried to assure her friend. "It may have shed light on some things, but we would've never worked. It's good that we know it now and not later in our marriage. It's for the best."

Vala gave her a sympathetic smile. "I'm sure it is."

They ate in comfortable silence for a few minutes before Sam broke it again.

"So, what's on the agenda today?"

Vala finished a sip of her coffee before answering. "I'm still going over the Replicator incident here on base to see if we can improve security measures against such an attack," she sounded like she'd rather do anything but that and it made Sam frown on the inside. "Jack wants me to see if there's a way to prevent any incursion from cutting us off from the self-destruct. We also need to make gaining access to the exits harder for intruders, but still manageable for employees."

Sam raised her brows in surprise. "That's…quite the task." No wonder Vala didn't look excited. "Not to mention exhausting."

Vala shrugged. "It'll take a lot of creativity to combat something like the Replicators again, but it needs to be done," she said pragmatically, and Sam could tell she meant it. "I don't exactly have much else to do since… Anyway, it'll keep me busy and out of trouble."

Sam watched as Vala's face became crestfallen at the reminder of Daniel and her heart broke for the woman. "I know we're not…him, but we are here for you. We do care."

Vala glanced down at her empty plate but not before Sam saw her eyes get glassy. "I know," she practically whispered.

Getting the sense that she wasn't ready to open up, Sam switched topics. "We received some intel. Anubis apparently is done hiding in the shadows. Ba'al isn't his patsy anymore, so we shouldn't be too surprised."

Vala chuckled humorlessly. "Defeat one bad guy only for another to step up," she remarked sardonically.

Sam's face twisted. "Kind of how it works around here."

"Any luck on finding Ba'al?"

"Unfortunately, no. But he's lost most of his Jaffa, his fleet, power, and position – it shouldn't be too long before we get him."

Her expression puzzled Sam. "Don't underestimate him, Samantha," Vala wasn't playing around, making Sam take it more seriously. "I know he's a prick, and as much as I hate to admit, he's a bloody intelligent one. Proceed with caution and tell Muscles the same."

She was worried about losing someone else, Sam realized. "We will." She would make sure it didn't happen.

o0o

Well, that wouldn't do, Vala thought to herself as she watched Jack flirt with a curly haired woman. Had she not known what she does now, she would've left it alone, but that was out of the question after her conversation with Samantha. No, this wouldn't do at all, and she was grateful she convinced the Colonel to come clean with her father about her engagement or else this would have crushed her poor friend. Samantha finally came to terms with the fact that she could never be happy with anyone else aside from a silver haired General and she would rather stay single than force herself into a situation that would only end in disaster.

Determined, she matched into the General's office and shut the door behind her. "Just how long has that been going on?" she demanded. Honestly, she sounded like she caught him red-handed in a worse situation, but she didn't care.

Jack raised his brows, presumably at her tone. "That is none of your damn business."

She took a seat and crossed her arms. "It concerns a friend of mine, so I rather think it is." She was being presumptuous, and he saw it. Judging by his demeanor, he wasn't too happy about it.

"You don't know what you're talking about."

"I rather think I do," she retorted instantly. "We both know what I am referring to, and you're lucky that I came to you instead of her like she planned. Seeing that… display would have certainly wounded her."

Jack was frustrated and it showed. "Daniel should've kept his mouth shut," he grumbled, clearly unhappy with her and the former archeologist. "And in case you forgot, Carter's engaged. What I do personally doesn't impact her at all."

Vala smiled triumphantly. She purposely kept Samantha's name out of it and here he was, confirming what she already knew. "Daniel didn't tell me. I guessed and he confirmed," she correctly quietly, feeling a wave of grief sweep through her at the reminder of Daniel. "And you're wrong on both accounts. Samantha does care and she isn't engaged."

Based on the limited TV she had seen, Vala was positive that she was breaking some sacred code of the Tau'ri females, but she honestly didn't care, especially when she saw Jack's face. That triumphant feeling turned a smidge to smug.

"What?" He said it so quietly, she could tell she shocked him.

"She ended it shortly after the Fair," she supplied, feeling a little guilty now. It hadn't been necessary to share that detail. "We both know that her marriage to that man wouldn't have made her happy – just like your… relationship to that woman won't make you happy."

Jack fiddled with a pen before asking hesitantly, "She okay?"

"She is," she assured him. "It's my belief that she'll be happier in the long run this way. Just like you will when you end your little… thing with that woman."

"You got a lot of nerve, you know that?" Though the words sounded stern, they were said in a casual manner.

"Tell me something I don't know." This was not new to her. "You both will be much happier this way."

o0o

Jack didn't appreciate Vala interfering with his…love life, he guessed would be the term. Just because she picked up on whatever between him and Carter didn't mean she knew everything. She was presuming too much, and he didn't like it.

He had been forced to bury his feelings for years all in the name of duty and for the protection of Earth. They both could have lost their careers or at least damaged them from the knowledge that Vala obtained. It became an instinct to protect himself from the reality of what he felt – how deeply it went – and protect Carter's career. It caused him to lash out.

"If you're so concerned about other people's happiness, maybe you should've focused on yours and Daniel's while he was here." Damn, he took that too far, but like he said – instinct to protect took over. It didn't mean that he didn't feel awful when he saw her face. "Shit," he sighed.

"What I may or may not have felt for Daniel is irrelevant. He's dead." She forced her voice to sound cold and it creeped him out a bit. "Which brings me to why I'm here. Samantha wants to hold a memorial for Daniel."

"Out of the question," he instantly denied. Daniel wasn't dead. He could feel it.

The look Vala gave him could only be described as pity…or sympathy. "Jack, he's gone," she said quietly. "You have to accept that. He was on one of those ships and didn't make it. You can't keep living in denial."

"Sure, I can," he forced himself to sound light. He then realized that she hadn't been here for Daniel's past deaths, and she didn't get it, or his current attitude. He forced himself to soften. "Look, you're still new here. You haven't been through what I have with him. So, when I say he's alive, I mean it."

She wasn't buying it. "You've no idea how much I want to believe that, but I can't," she looked so sad, it made him want to hug her. "Samantha would like to hold the memorial this Friday," she abruptly changed the subject.

"No," he denied again. "Tell Carter to come talk to me about it."

Vala sighed.

"Mark my words! He'll come waltzing through the door any time now!" They both glanced at the other door. "Waltzing," he said again, willing the man to come through.

"Fine, I'll tell her," she conceded reluctantly, "but only because I don't have time to argue with you. I need to get back to work."

Ah, work. Their number one tactic to avoid the unpleasant and complicated emotions. "You can't keep ignoring what you feel with work," he told her gently, causing her to pause halfway out the door. "It won't make whatever you're feeling go away."

She didn't speak for a moment and just stood still. "Pretending it doesn't exist won't either." She left once the words were out.

Damn. She didn't beat around the bush, did she?