I Live

Dizclaimer. Own nothing. Please don't sue. Anyway, you won't have the chance. I live too far:) characters belong to Rowling, lyrics belong to Biohazard…Umm? Aaa- anything else?

I live. Inspite of everything. I breathe. Fresh air. It means so much for me. Breathing, touching, seeing. All those senses and feelings that where lost for years. Long, very long years of unbearabale pain, angst, misery and bitternes. You just can't imagine what I've been through. No-one can. I can't say that I didn't deserve it, no, I did.  Really. I understand how much pain and death I caused, and I appreciate it. Yeah, I enjoyed killing my political enemies, I enjoyed weaving tangled webs of horror, lies and terror, well, because it was my nature. And my goal. I just wanted to return my pain to the world, to make it suffer as I did. So, being a Slytherin, I achieved that goal. Fully. My name made the bravest people tremble and fall to the ground. My breathing poisioned the air. My hand was the hand of Death, the wrath of Inevitability. It was a damned good time. Torturing, killing those bastards with a simple gesture was pure fun. I' ve murdered people. I drank their blood and became stronger and stronger…

I made two worlds collide. The wizards's world and the muggles's . Because we, wizards, were being destinied to rule the world. Nobody understood that. I didn't want to completely destroy muggles, though. Our world needed the revolution, the muggle technologies, the territory, the freedom to make our choices…We became tired of hiding. People, who finally understood that became my allies in the war with the Ministry Of Magic, the archenemy of the wizardring world. They controled mages for years and did not want to give up their dictationist regime. So, the war began. But inside, I always knew that it was just an excuse for my hatred and bloodlust. Yes, I have been a monster, a maniac, feared even by my loyal servants. I was covered with darkness, and black were my thoughts. Nobody could endure my snake stare…I started the reign of terror and repression. And I fucking liked it…

How funny. I never, never had any remorse towards my deeds. Neither I have it now. I'm a fatalist, you know. But even then I was weak and foolish, yound and impulsive. My rage swept across legions of my enemies, leaving dead bodies behind. I had no pity. I was pure violence. Stupid violence, because I'd thought I was invincible. Yet, I was not…

They sent a muggle killer. A sniper, who was a rare professional. They tracked me down and…he knew his job well…too bad for me.

He shot me, two rounds in my skinny body, splattering the blood all around my apartment. I even didn't have the time to dodge the bullets. He wrecked my rib cage, spine, guts. But he hadn't shot me in the head. That's why I'm still alive…It's hard to kill the greatest Dark wizard.

I'm lying in a pool of my own dark red blood, and I don't regret it a bit. I inhale and exhale, my mind works. I live. I breathe. I think. Maybe it's because of the inner fire, that's burning in me, the fire of pain and hatred, the fire that kept me moving, that kept me partially sane and alive…I'm a killer…I'm killed. I'm motionless. But I will live. I will have my revenge.

 I remember these words "there is no good or evil, only power and those weak to seek it", told me by my teacher. He was right. I was a Seeker. I found power. And I'm strong. To live, to have a will for living. My bussines on this land is not over. Not…yet.

Through the blood, pouring out of my mouth, I grin. They will suffer. Everyone will pay. For this and other things. No excuses. I am Evil. I am so violated…

" Can you feel my torments, can you feel my anger, can you feel my misery…"

As it said in my credo, alike to a muggle song: "HATE FUCK FIGHT KILL"

That's exactly what I'm planning to do. Because I live. I breathe. For my name is

Mordeth.

Or, former Harry James Potter…

A/N: this awful fic was inspired by Biohazard's "HFFK" song. I hope you liked it *grins sheepishly*  I'm sorry if the language isn't very good… 'cause I'm from russia:) anyway, I'm thinking of making a big fat fic about why Harry became evil…so, plzzzzzzzzzzzzz, R/R, so I could decide on either writing or not :) all for now, see ya!