And Then There Were Three
Chapter Six: Room With A View

She loved the place. I mean really loved it. We didn't have much time, after spending a couple of hours before sunrise loading up my car to get all her stuff and mine to the apartment. She runs around like an excited child now we've made the last trip.

"Spike!" she cries, throwing a door open. "This can be your room!"

I look in and shake my head.

"No, pet," I tell her. "You or Anya can have that room."

"Where will you sleep then?" she asks and I show her the smallest room, which fortunately, only has one small window.

"But it's so small!" she protests.

"I don't mind. You girls have the bigger rooms, and anyway, Mr Sunshine can't get in. Well, not much."

"Oh," she nods and looks like the thought didn't occur to her 'til I mentioned it. "We'll have to get you some dark curtains."

"Don't worry 'bout me, Tara."

"I do," she replies and digs in one of the cardboard boxes. She holds up the large black blanket that I use to get around in the daytime. "Get me the pins?" she asks as she goes into my room.

I look in another box and find them. I take them to her and watch her struggle to hang it over the window. I take pity her and grab her hips to heave her up a little. She's feather light and she struggles a little, kicking out and glaring down at me.

"Put me down," she says.

"All right," I start to lower her. "But you're not going anywhere 'til you get that up and you'll be late."

"Lift me up," she laughs and the blanket is pinned into place in seconds.

She goes into the kitchen and plugs in the microwave to heat my blood.

"Right," she says. "I'll go to class. You drink this and have some sleep. We'll unpack tonight."

"No, I'll - "

"Spike," she interrupts. "I am the lady of the house and I say we'll do it together. Ok?"

I laugh then.

"Ok, Tara, pet," I'm startled when she grabs me and hugs me tightly.

"Thank you, Spike," she says. "This is all so wonderful," she pulls back and reaches for her bag and books. "We're going to be happy here," she states firmly. "yYu, me and Anya. We're going to be happy."

She goes then. I believe her, y'know? I look around and decide to go into my darkened room, the sun creeping across the floor coming a little too close. I lay down and I can still smell her.

Happy. That's what she said. Already there, pet.

Tara came in with Dawn. They were chattering happy, not seeming to notice me. I had taken the blanket down from my room – and yes, it bleedin' hurt – and put it up in here – and nearly got burned to a bloody crisp. I was watching the telly and they paused by my chair.

"Hey, Spike," Tara said.

"Hey," I returned.

I waited for Dawn to say something. Usually you can't get her to be quiet, but now she's glowering down at me, arms folded.

"What's wrong with you?" I ask, looking at her. "Bee in your bonnet?"

"The bee happens to be you," she replies.

"Oh?"

"When were you going to tell me you'd moved?"

Oh. Big sis didn't tell her I'd moved. God, Buffy can be a right cow.

"She didn't tell you," I mutter.

"What?"

"Buffy," I tell her. "She saw me leaving the crypt yesterday. Figured she'd tell you."

"She didn't," but it seems to appease her, she sits down on the floor beside me.

"Where'd you see Tara?" I ask after a while.

"Willow," Tara said, approaching with her head bowed. "Asked me after class if I could pick her up from school and look after her. Apparently there's this big goopy demon about that they're going after."

"And they didn't invite you along?" I ask.

She shakes her head.

"Is pizza ok, Dawn?" she asks.

Dawn nods and leans back a little more, her head leaning against my knee. My hand drifts down to stroke her hair and Tara smiles at me when she sees.

"You all right?" I ask.

She looks at me for a second; she knows what I mean.

"I wasn't, but I am now."

"Do they know you live here? With me?"

"They didn't," she shrugs stiffly. "But I said Dawn would like to see you and Willow asked what I meant. I don't think she was too happy when I told her, but she said at least I wasn't alone. I didn't mention Anya."

"Anya?" Dawn looks up. "You've seen her? Is she ok?"

"We're working on finding her, Dawnie," Tara tells her.

"I think it's cool," Dawn announces. "You two living together. It would be even cooler if I could stay sometimes."

I chuckle and ruffle her hair slightly.

"If you want."

She grins then, all happy. I hope it's not to get away from Buffy. They need to learn to get along. Problem with them two is that they're too alike.

Tara reaches for the phone, but she blushes wildly and hides behind her hair when Dawn says, "You two would make such a cute couple."

Did I ever mention how much I want to damage Bit?

We didn't receive an exactly warm welcome when we turned up at the motel Anya was staying in. You'd think the bint would've been appreciative of the fact we drove for hours to find her in the middle of bloody nowhere. But no, shouldn't really've expected it, this is Anyanka after all.

"What are you doing here?" she asked, see what I mean? Like a soddin' Arctic breeze when she opened the door.

"We came to find you, sweetie," Tara said gently.

Anya stared blankly at her for a second. There was disbelief and confusion in her eyes and I realised she didn't think anyone would come after her. She thought everyone would rally around Xander and not her. Well, not us, not me and Tara. We're on her side, whether she likes it or not.

"Gonna let us in?" I asked gently.

She studied me and frowned slightly at Tara, then pushed the door open wider and walked away with a muttered, "Come in."

She sat the entire time with her hands twisted together and pressed between her knees. Tara coaxed and promised we'd help her, but she was having none of it.

"I'm not going back," she repeated. "I can't be around him."

I kept quiet the entire time, just sitting watching as Tara comforted and pleaded with her to come back to Sunnydale. Then, after half an hour of it, I lost my rag.

"Look, Anya," I shouted. "We came all this way to see if you were all right. We've got an apartment with three bedrooms when we could've easily got two. We actually give a damn about you! We know how it feels. On some level, we understand. Bloody hell, woman, we care!"

"Why?" she whispered, staring at me. "Why do you care? What do you understand?"

I sat back down, not having realised I'd leapt up. Tara glanced at me, disapproving of my methods. She leaned forward and took Anya's hands.

"I lost Willow. I know it's nothing like you, I walked away, not the other way around. But I understand how much it hurts."

"And Spike?" she asked. "How does he understand? And why are you two hanging around together?"

"Spike and I became friends," Tara explained. "He and Buffy had… thing."

I snorted there. Thing, yeah, that was what I'd called it. 'Cause I weren't gonna call it a relationship. Tara looked at me apologetically.

"A thing?" for a second, Anya looked distracted.

"We fought, we shagged, she left," I twisted my lips and ran a hand over my hair. "She always leaves."

"I… didn't know," she said. "You're together? Xan – he never told me."

"He never knew," I shrugged. "Didn't want anyone to know she was banging the evil, soulless thing."

"They don't like demons," Anya said. "Not you, and I think Xander didn't want me because I used to be a demon," she turned to Tara then. "But they didn't mind when they thought you were a demon."

Tara blushed then and bowed her head before she answered.

"They liked you, Anya, Xander was just scared."

"Yeah," I agreed. "They liked you, just didn't like me. So, you coming back or what?"

"No."

And there went my temper again.

"God dammit, woman!" I yelled. "You're not the one who should run away! You're the one that was wronged! You're gonna let him go on like nothing happened? Why should you leave and start over? You've got a job back in Sunny D, a good job that you love, a place to stay with me and Glinda here and people who understand," I grabbed Tara's hand and pulled her up. "But if you want to stay here all on your lonesome and live by yourself, you go right on ahead, we won't stop you. C'mon, love," I pulled Tara after me as I made for the door.

"Wait," Anya called weakly. "I'll come," she lifted her chin and some of the person I knew shone in her eyes. "I don't have to leave. I've cursed men for less than what he did to me," she started grabbing her things together and anger seeped into her voice. "I might not have taken D'Hoffryn up on his offer to return to vengeance so I can't curse him, but I can make him very uncomfortable..."

She's curled in the back seat right now. Trying to stare out of the window, impossible, seeings as I painted 'em black years ago. Tara keeps throwing her anxious glances. I glance up to look in the mirror and I see Tara reach out to take Anya's hand. Anya squeezes it. It's strange, this silence. Anya's usually always talking. I remember the night Buffy died when she was trying to get everyone to "think outside of the box." Got on me bleedin' nerves at the time, then she came up with the idea of using the Dagonsphere and the troll hammer. If she hadn't come up with that, we wouldn't've had a leg to stand on. Smart girl.

"My things," she whispers suddenly.

"What's that, pet?" I ask.

"My things," she repeats. "They're all at ho – Xander's, I mean."

"We'll get them for you," Tara says.

"No," Anya replies firmly. "I'll go. I shouldn't have to avoid him."

"Want me to swing 'round now?" I ask. "Tara could go in with you, I'll wait outside."

"Yes," she nods. "You'll come with me?" she asks Tara.

"Of course, sweetie."

So I swing the car around and go the few blocks to Harris's apartment. I park outside and Anya and Tara climb out. I watch 'em for a second, 'til they disappear, then I lean back and light a ciggie. Looking forward to the future, I am. Got a good friend in Tara and… Well, I don't know what Anya could be, but she doesn't irritate me as much as her ex does.

Talk of the bloody devil. The loud rapping on my window accompanies the familiar scent of Xander. That smacks of spending too much time with 'em, me knowing their scents. Know all of 'em off by heart. Makes me sick to think I know 'em just by a quick sniff.

"What?" I ask, winding the window down to glare at him.

"I was late for work yesterday, thanks to you," he snaps.

"Sorry about that, mate. But if you will put innocent children in a shop with a addict, you have to be prepared to make sacrifices."

"What are you talking about?" he asks.

Twat still doesn't get it. So I'd best lay it all out, hadn't I?

"Red gave up magic," I tell him.

"I know," he snaps. "She's my friend, not yours."

"Yet I seem the only one who realises that just 'cause she gave up magic doesn't mean she's hunky-dory. Do you shove a drug addict in a room full of the stuff? No, you bloody well don't and drugs aren't half as dangerous as magic is."

He looks like he gets it and his eyes widen.

"Oh, no," he mutters. "But she said she was fine looking after the shop."

"'Cause she's really gonna tell you to stick it, isn't she?"

He looks annoyed. Like it's my fault the little witch went apeshit and nearly killed Bit. Like it was me who chained her to the shop. Always the bleedin' scapegoat, me, you'd've thought I'd be over it now, wouldn't you?

"Why are you hanging around here, Spike?" he asks.

"Waiting for us."

Xander whirls around and gawps at Tara and Anya. I get out the car and take the two cases from Tara, noticing the bits of clothing dangling out, looks like she packed quick. I throw 'em in the trunk, take the large cardboard box with magazines and things in Anya's arms, and put it in the front passenger seat. Then I lean against the car and light a new cigarette, ready to watch the fireworks. And lucky me got a front row seat.

"Anya," Xander steps forward, arms wide, like he's gonna hug her. Blind sod at the best of times, but could you miss two honking cases and a box that screams 'I'm moving the fuck out'?

She steps back, warding him off with her hands.

"Don't, Xander," she says quietly.

"You came back, hon," he breathes.

"I came back," she states. "But not to you."

He looks floored, like he doesn't get why she wouldn't come back to him. God, does the guy need everything spelled out to him. Maybe his chums should invest in a little board. He could probably get life if he had the appropriate diagrams.

"Why not?" he asks. Here we go, no way Anya's gonna stand for that.

"Why not?" she repeats, her anger evident in her voice. "Why not? Because you left me at the altar, Xander! Because you did the romantic proposal before the world was due to end, told me you loved me and then you just left. I think I'm supposed to say that it's not you, it's me, that's what they always say in the movies. But it's not me, it's you."

Ouch. He winced at that one. Not surprised, I would've too.

"Ahn, I didn't mean to hurt you - "

"But you did," she snaps. "And you know what? D'Hoffryn offered me the chance to be a vengeance demon again," I remember her mentioning that back at the motel and now I'm glad that I don't have to be surprised and I can revel in his shock instead. "But I didn't take up his offer."

"I – I… Why…?" he gapes, looking wonderfully like a fish out of water. Wonder if he'll die from lack of oxygen. If he did, I wouldn't have to help, having no breath and all. So, I couldn't be blamed if the whelp died. Of course, Buffy would find a way round that.

"Why?" Anya looks like she doesn't know herself. "Because I like my life. Apart from the pain of you leaving me, I like it here. I like having friends and a job. I can't have that as a vengeance demon. I don't see why I had to give up what I enjoy just because of you. I've spent centuries cursing men because women couldn't just get over it, I won't be one of them," she looks at Tara, who's been silent the entire time. Watching the scene play out without hiding in her hair. Then Anya looks at me, pleading silently. So I turn and open the back door. She turns and begins to climb in, but Xander grabs her arm and yanks her back.

"Where are you going?" he demands. "With him?"

"Home," she retorts. "With Tara and Spike."

Tara touches my arm when she notices I'm trying hard not to drag Harris off Anya.

"We have an apartment," Tara informs Xander calmly but firmly. "Spike and I. There's a third bedroom Anya can have. She'll be fine, we'll take good care of her."

"I don't mind her moving in with you, Tara," Xander says. "But I won't let her move in with him," he jerks his chin in my direction.

"Why not?" I ask, talking for the first time since Anya and Tara came out. "I haven't so much as touched her. You, on the other hand, are hurting her," I toss my cigarette away before I reach out and easily remove his hand from her elbow. I endure a brief flash of pain from my rough treatment of the delicate human, but it's worth it just to see Xander's face as Anya rubs her elbow.

"Anya, I didn't mean…"

"But it still hurts," she says quietly, I know she isn't talking about her arm, she's talking about her heart. Then she ducks into the car and sits still and calm. Tara places a nervous but gentle hand on his arm.

"We will look after her," she promises.

"I'm not worried about you," he says, then looks down his nose at me. "I don't want her around him."

"Fine," I say and stick my head in the car. "Anya? You can't come and live with me and Tara. Now if you don't move in with monkey boy, you'll have to find a comfy shop doorway somewhere," I smirk at Xander's stupidness. "Like a delivery to the night time nasties."

"Don't you threaten her!" Xander yells.

"I'm not!" I shout. "You're making all the bloody threats! You can't have her, so she can't be happy, that it?"

"No - "

"Then give it up!" I turn to Tara. "Ready, pet?"

"Wait," Xander grabs Tara's shoulder, not hurting her though, but I might rough him up a bit just for touching her all the same. "Why are you living with him? Willow told me you were, but why?" he lowers his voice to a hiss. "He's a vampire."

"He's my friend," she says. "And he's not going to hurt me or Anya. He understands, Xander. How I felt after… He does."

"Yeah, he understands. Because bleach boy had such normal relationships. There was the fruitcake responsible for making him the bane of our existences in the first place. Then there was Harmony. And now you spend your time moping after Buffy, who would never look twice at you because you, Spike, are just an evil disgus - " I didn't let him finish. I grabbed his coat and whirled him round, banging him into the car.

"Shut up!" I growl. "You don't know anything about me and Dru, or Harm. And you don't know the first thing about me and Buffy either!"

"You and Buffy?" he mocks. "You mean the little thing you have going on?"

What? She told him? Does that mean…? Then I see the sneer on his face, the way his lip curled up as he pushed me away. Arsehole. I could kill him.

"In your imagination, I mean," he continues. "Because Buffy would never touch you. Ever."

"You - " I grab him again, slamming him once more into the car. Tara knows I'm about to blurt it out, tell him how Buffy shagged me more times than I can count and in countless positions.

"Spike," she warns.

I slam him hard into the car, making him wince and me flinch. Then an arm reaches out and grabs my coat. I glance down and Anya's looking at me.

"Don't," she says. "You don't beat him up. It's supposed to be my father or brother."

"But you don't have 'em," I tell her. "So I'll do it on their behalf."

"No," her voice is stronger now and she struggles out of the car to stand with her hands on her hips, glaring at me. No, wait, glaring at Xander. "Please let him go," so I let him go and step back. "I will move in with Tara and Spike. You can't stop me, you have no control over me anymore. Does he?" she looks at Tara who shakes her head. "I can't do this now, Xander. I'll be coming into work tomorrow and every day after that."

"All right," he nods and starts to walk away, pausing before me. "You touch her," he warns. "You hurt one hair on her head and I'll stake you myself."

"I could never hurt her as much as you have," I say and put an arm around her shoulders. I take slight pity on him when he glances away. "But I won't hurt her. Or Tara."

He studies me for a second then gives a tiny nod. Then he walks away. I push Anya gently towards the car and she crawls inside. Tara looks at me and smiles.

"It was good, what you did, not telling him about you and Buffy," she says. "That's up to her."

"I know," I shrug. "But she never will."

Tara smiles again, ruefully this time as she gets in the car beside Anya. I glance back to see Xander disappear into the building. His shoulders stooped and his walk slow and laboured.

I've felt like that.