Disclaimer: Go away and look at previous disclaimers.

Chapter 5:
Of Transformations and Trelawney.


My books are friends that never fail me.
~ Thomas Carlyle

Slowly draining the background sounds away, Harry conjured the image of his chosen form in his mind. He started to view the bird from separate angles, adding them to to each other and moving on to the next angle.
For each angle he envisioned the way it would look in different poses; flying, with it's wings outstretched; asleep; standing; taking off. He imagined each patch of black on it's white underside, the shadow from it's wings, the unique marking on it's forehead. He heard it's calls, and in his mind's eye saw it's curved talons and wicked beak.
He imagined the feeling of flying, not a prisoner to Earth's pull, and the rush of the hunt, swooping down.
He felt the territorial instincts as it defended it's territory; and realised that he wasn't imagining it any more.
He could really feel the instincts and thoughts of a peregrine falcon, overlapping his human sentiency.
He opened his eyes.
The vision was a shock. Briefly he remembered one of his Biology lessons; 'Predatory birds can see for miles around,' the teacher had said, 'Falcons and hawks have the best sight.'
Every inch of the room was visible. He could see flecks of dust dancing in the air, the way the sunlight moved into the room, the pores of Ron's fa- ew.
Ron was staring at him with a mix of excitement and disbelief. "What's wrong?" Harry asked, but it came out as a squawk.
"Harry, are you alright? Did it hurt?" Ron gasped, still staring.
Gazing down at himself, Harry realised the reason for his bird-like cry. His eyesight was changed, that much was obvious, but his hands and arms were wings. His elbow had reversed direction, and his arm bones had become hollow and light. White feathers sprung out, black dots adorning them, and his black robes had become white and feathered at the front; obviously, his clothing was incorporated into the change.
On the back of his robes as well, the black cloak had stayed black, but had nearly fully formed feathers, silky smooth, lying flat.
He felt slightly shorter as well, but only by a few centimetres.
"Geez," breathed Ron, "That's your first try. You'll have it before Hermione at this rate. These usually take years. I heard even Merlin took months, and all he could get the first try were claws."
Harry, realising his vocal chords must have changed, gave Ron a questioning look.
"He became a dragon. A red one, a Chinese Fireball." Ron enlightened. "Okay, try to change back, I want a go."
Keeping his eyes open this time, Harry thought about his human form. It was easier this time; he knew exactly how he looked and thought, instead of having to make up a completely new form.
In just a few seconds, he had shifted back.
Ron gave a few claps. "Now that was cool. Your scar changed as well, I don't know if you felt. And your eyes, you wouldn't know that."
"My sight was a lot better, but I didn't know they looked different." Harry murmured, comparing his human vision to his Animagus forms'. He put his glasses back on.
"Yeah," Ron grinned, "You looked really freaky with these round, black eyes. And your scar turned this really bright white. It was amazing." He moved further into the space and let Harry move out so he could see the door.
"You keep watch now, tell me if anyone comes."
Harry watched as Ron closed his eyes. He looked deep in concentration, frowning slightly.
Looking carefully, Harry watched as Ron's freckles turned a dazzling silver, and long whiskers of the same colour grew out of his cheeks.
Slowly, his ears changed shape, the tips turning to a point, and edged further up his head, his red hair brushed aside. As they moved and grew, they changed to a furry red, coming to rest on top of his Ron's head.
Looking away from the ears, Harry nearly jumped when he saw a silver tipped fox's tail swishing around, and Ron's hands were almost paws; his fingers had melded together, and silvery claws were growing instead of fingernails.
"Don't stop," Harry urged, feeling a pang of excitement, "You've changed a lot, just keep going."
A fur-like pattern emerged on Ron's skin, turning a pale orange and darkening to red; it rippled up and down the boy and his clothes, turning 3-D and emerging as fur.
"Ron," choked Harry, "You've got fur; and. . . Just don't stop. Keep going, you're further than me now."
Complying to his friend's request, Ron continued, obviously having trouble resisting the urge to open his eyes.
His arms and legs shifted direction now, forcing him to fall, but Harry grabbed him. "Not much longer." he said.
Ron's face started to bulge out, his nose growing smaller and black, as Ron himself grew smaller. His shoes were changing now, to paws, confirming that their clothes would change with them.
A few seconds later, the change was over, and a fox stood before Harry, eyes still closed. 'What the heck is happening?' Harry wondered, This should take years, and he's done it on his first try; I probably would have as well, if I hadn't stopped.'
"You can open your eyes now." Harry said, fighting a losing battle to keep his face straight. An Animagus! Ron was an Animagus! He'd definitely won his bet with Herm', that much was certain.
Ron opened his eyes immediately, allowing Harry to see hazel-brown irises.
Letting out a yelp - of joy or shock, Harry wasn't sure - and craned his head round, looking at his fur and tail. He turned back to Harry, eyes sparkling, and gave another bark.
"Great! Okay, don't change back yet." Harry said, flipping the pages of his book forward to chapter seven. "You do realise that you completely skipped four chapters of training, don't you?" Ron gave him a self-satisfied look.
"I'll take that as a 'no, but I'm proud of it' look." Harry said, still smiling, looking for the right page. "Okay, here it is. Once you've completed your transformation, if you think a few words, then you can change into it whenever you want without having to go through all the concentration. Just think the words over in your head until you feel a jolt. Got it?" He forced back a laugh at seeing a fox nod earnestly. There were some things that the Wizarding world never readied you for.
"Right then. The words are 'Animagus Activus'."
Ron closed his eyes and focused. A second later, he shifted back to a human.
"It worked!" he gasped, "Can you believe that? I was faster than Merlin! I was faster than you!"
"And I bet you were faster than Hermione." Harry added.
Ron groaned. "Oh, Hermione. I should have bet money, damn it."
Harry rolled his eyes. "Is that all you can think about?"
"Yep." Ron said automatically. "Now, what's the time?"
Harry checked his watch. "Four o'clock. You mastered the Animagus transformation in just under two hours."
If you could burst from swelling with pride, Ron would have been just a few scraps of skin, drifting to the ground.
"And I want another go." Harry added. "I think I could have finished it if I hadn't have stopped."
"Yeah," Ron answered, off in a world of his own. "Sure, I'll keep watch. Do you know what I could do with this power, Harry? Harry?"
Harry was unable to answer; already half changing into a bird made it easier the second time, which meant Harry was changing quickly, and already changed to the halfling form that he had stopped at before. Now, he was transforming more slowly, his mouth bulging out to form a hard beak.
Feathers flowed over his body and head, black and white, while the rest of his bones became as light and hollow as his wings.
He was shrinking, and his feet were changing, growing talons and curving, yellow toes.
Realising he had finished his conversion, Harry closed his eyes again. 'Animagus Activus,' he said to himself, feeling an urge to test his wings. 'Animagus Activus. Animagus Activus. Animagus Activ-' Feeling a jolt and a tingling sensation, he knew he had turned the 'switch' on, and could now transform at will.
You look tasty. said Ron cheerfully. You'd just about make a mouthful.
I can understand you, you know. Harry retorted. People in Animagus form can understand each other.
There was silence. Oops.
Just don't eat me. Harry spread his wings and admired them, So, when are we going to tell Hermione? And what are we going to do with these forms?
Ron stretched his paws. This is just so cool. We should tell Hermione straight away, or she'll moan about us keeping secrets even more. And I was thinking we could sneak out at night; go into Hogsmeade, the Forbidden Forest, those sort of places.
Suppose so. Harry said thoughtfully, And we can ask Herm' whether she knows why we changed so quickly. That's one thing I'd like to know.
Yeah, and we can find out what she's changing into, and whether she's managed it yet. How far along are we meant to be?
On the first lesson, we should be learning how to think correctly. There shouldn't be the slightest change. A thought struck Harry. Maybe we're just really good. Some kind of natural talent for it.
Maybe, Ron sounded doubtful, but even with a talent, we shouldn't do it on the first go. You have a talent for flying, but you weren't the best on Earth on your first flight. In the school, yeah, but you still had to learn flying tricks. With talent, we'd just transform within a few months, not hours.
There goes that idea. Want to change back? It's not as though we can sneak out in daytime.
I guess so. Where would Hermione be?
Easy. Harry said promptly. She'll be getting help from McGonagall. She won't go against the rules and do it without permission, and she wants to beat us. The fastest way would be to be trained by an Animagus and transfiguration teacher.
For all the good it'll do her. snorted Ron, and started to change back. With the transformation completed, it only took two seconds to change back. Harry did the same. "I'm going to have to try to fly next time I change. And you should try running. It'll be completely different on four legs, with the joints different.
Ron winced. "Good point. That's going to hurt if I try to move them like human legs."
"Should we tell one of the teachers? i mean, it is illegal."
Ron shook his head. "No way, mate. If any of the teachers knew, they'd spoil all our fun. Do you really think they'll let us go out and sneak around the grounds?"
"You have a point." Harry sighed, opening the classroom door and walking out. Ron tagged along by his side. "Transfiguration room?"
"Let's try the Gryffindor tower first. I want to put my book back."
Just after six minutes later, they were back at Gryffindor tower, ignoring the Fat Lady's moans about 'never before having such a silly password, you ought to ashamed of yourselves . . .' and drooping the Animagus book into Harry's trunk.
As they returned down into the common room, Harry saw Ginny sitting reading by the window.
"Ginny, have you seen Hermione?" Harry asked, almost running over. Ginny looked up from her book. "Yeah. She looked really angry about something, though. Have you fallen out?"
"I think she's fallen out with Ron," Harry said honestly, "but I dunno about me."
Ginny gave Ron a reproving look. "Anything to do with Krum?"
"No!" Ron cried, exasperated. His eyes suddenly narrowed in suspicion. "Why? Was she talking about him? Did she visit him over the holidays?"
"Oh, for goodness' sake. No, she didn't say a word about him, and no, she didn't visit him. I just thought it would be the most likely thing for you to have an argument over."
Before Ron could add Ginny to his list of 'People I've Fallen Out With', Harry butted in. "Do you know where Ginny is right now?"
"She said she'd be going to see McGonagall later. Didn't say what for, though." She looked back at her book. "She's in the girl's dorm right now.."
"Thanks Gin'." Ron said, sounding relieved. "Are we allowed to go in?"
"No, but if you're going to be making up with her, then I suppose so."
"Brill', thanks again." Ron grabbed Harry's arm and started dragging him back up the spiral stairs. "Let's go, Harry!"
"Let go, Ron!"

~ ~ ~

Finally managing to free himself from Ron's grasp, Harry followed him the rest of the way. Stopping five turns of the stairs up, they entered the corridor that led off from it. To the right was the boy's fifth year dorms; they took the left to the other circular room.
Entering, they saw Hermione sitting on her bed, reading the book from the library. She looked up as they entered.
"Oh, it's you two." she snapped, "Come to apologise?"
Harry answered quickly as Ron opened his mouth. "Yeah, and something else as well."
Hermione glared at them, but her expression softened. "Fine, you're forgiven. What's the other thing?"
Harry glanced at Ron. Ron glanced at Harry. "Well. . ." Harry began.
"We sort of. . . read about how to become an Animagus. . ."
"And we went and started training. . ." Harry added, "And then. . ."
There was an uncomfortable silence. Hermione broke it. "And then? What happened?"
Ron made a swift reply. "How about, we'll tell you what happened if you tell us what you keep writing about, and why you wanted to talk to Sirius."
Hermione frowned. "Did something really important happen?"
Harry nodded, and Hermione seemed convinced. "Alright then. I'm writing a book."
Harry and Ron stared. "A. . . book?" Ron said cautiously.
"What kind of book?" Harry ventured. Hermione gave a dazzling smile, and produced her notebook from under her pillow. "A Revised Edition of Hogwarts, A History." she declared. "I've been taking notes on what new things to include. There's going to be a section on Quidditch - that was missing from the old version, and a section on house-elves; I've been working all holiday, and the first draft should be ready in a while."
Harry was, needless to say, quite impressed. "Great! But why'd you need to talk to Sirius?"
Hermione stuffed the notebook back under her pillow. "In the introduction, I'm comparing the school to how it was a few decades back, so I needed to find a student. But I didn't want to ask a teacher or parent in case they thought writing a book was a stupid idea."
"There's no way that's a stupid idea, Herm'!" Ron insisted, "That's brilliant! The old version must have been written a decade ago, and it's way too boring."
"Eight years, actually." Hermione corrected, but she looked pleased. "Well, anyway, I'm thinking about becoming a marbled polecat; they're really beautiful. Is it something about your chosen Animagus forms that you wanted to tell me?"
"Not. . . quite." Harry took a breath. "You know how becoming an Animagus takes years?"
"Of course." Hermione held up the book on her lap. According to the front cover, it was 'An Introduction to the Abilities and History of the Animagus' by Geromard Tween. "This books says that the fastest someone ever became an Animagus was eight weeks; that was Merlin. The second fastest was six months; and that was Dumbledore."
"He's an Animagus?" Ron said in interest. "What animal?"
"It doesn't say, but don't try to change the subject. I've told you what I was doing, now it's your turn." Hermione gave them The Look, and closed the book.
"Okay, then" Harry sighed. "Just don't get angry, or hysterical or anything." Hermione nodded her assent.
"Ron and I went to the Charms room to try and learn. Ron chose a fox, and I chose a falcon."
"Yes?" Hermione said, becoming interested.
"So, we went in, and we tried to become our animals - and we did it."
Harry had not believed such a silence was possible; a grain of dust being dropped would have echoed around the room. Hermione finally found her voice. "You did it ?" she whispered. "You became your animals? But that's - that's impossible. Completely impossible. You must have had three hours at most."
"Two." Ron said, making Harry feel strangely guilty. "We changed in two hours, and said the charm. We're Animagus'."
Then, with a shriek of pure delight, Hermione leapt up and hugged them both.

~ ~ ~

It took nearly a quarter of an hour to detach Hermione from them, but finally they managed to. Judging by Hermione's reaction, she was not only not jealous or disbelieving, she was also pleased and excited. "Two hours," she kept giggling, "A new record. That's faster than Merlin himself !"
Ron looked quite proud of himself.
"You have to tell me everything. Now." she gasped, collapsing on the bed. "How did you do it? What do your fox and your falcon look like?"
Harry looked at Ron, who shrugged. The pair sat down on the bed that was facing Hermione's. "Well, I don't think we did anything special." Harry began. "I think we must have some kind of natural ability for it, because we just did it. I don't think we've discovered a new way to do it or anything. That's the thing we can't explain."
"But, your question about forms, we can." Ron interrupted. "But I think you'd understand more, if I did this." He smiled cheekily, and within a few seconds, a silver-tailed, red fox stood in his place. Harry held Hermione back as she tried, unsuccessfully, to launch herself at him again.
Ron turned around, letting her see all round him, and changed back. "Your turn, mate." he said to Harry, motioning to come out. "The spotlight awaits."
Getting up, Harry walked to where Ron was standing, who, in turn, moved over to the bed.
'Change.' he told himself, allowing the image of a peregrine falcon to come to mind. Suddenly, he was shooting downwards, and his arms grew out, as feathers washed over him. In just two seconds, the boy was a bird.
Hermione gazed at him. "This is amazing," she breathed. Her face grew stern. "You are going to tell Dumbledore, aren't you? And sign up as registered Animagus'?"
Ron groaned. "Come on, Herm', how are we meant to have any fun if people know what we are?"
Harry shifted back. "How about the day you publish your book, we sign up and tell Dumbledore."
"But my book could take a year to be written!" Hermione exclaimed, standing up. "You have to be joking."
Harry cocked an eyebrow. "Will you be telling anyone about your book?"
Hermione glared at him. "Alright then. When I have it published or get my rejection letter, you both sign up. Is it fun?" she asked, suddenly wistful.
"You have no idea." Ron said, excited. "We'll help you become an Animagus. What does a thingy look like?"
"A marbled polecat." Hermione amended. She moved over to her trunk and opened it, searching through the heaps of books. Ron waited, and Harry moved over to look inside. "Hermione? Have you put a Never-Fill charm on your trunk?"
She didn't look up. "No, I just tripled the space. It still has a bottom. I used the same spell Mr Weasley used on the car." She moved aside a book on magical plants. "Here it is!" she said, bringing out 'Wildlife of Britain and Europe'. She flicked a few pages into the book. "Here, in the mammal's section." She showed the page to Ron and Harry. There was picture of an otter-like creature. It's paws and stomach were black, and it's face was white with a black stripe across the eyes. The tip of it's tail was black as well, but it's back and main tail were a marbled cream and light brown.
"Marbled Polecat." Ron read, "Head and body, thirty to thirty-eight centimetres, tail fifteen to twenty. Found in South-East England. Eats lizards, reptiles and small mammals. Yuk."
"I don't think it really says 'yuk', Ron." Harry grinned. He took the book off Ron and returned it to Hermione. "What markings are you going to have?"
Hermione smiled. "The marbled back is going to be in a spider-web pattern." Ron looked disturbed with that idea, but wisely said nothing.
"I'm going to start training tomorrow, if I have time after homework." she explained, "Although I think I'll get proper training from Professor McGonagall, rather than do it on my own."
"Great." Harry said cheerfully, as Hermione put the wildlife book back in her trunk. He looked at his watch. "It's seven o'clock." he informed his friends. "There's two hours until the curfew. What'll we do 'til then?"
"We could revise." suggested Hermione.
Naturally, the boys ignored the idea of studying. "Let's try the Fortune Finder out again." Ron said, "If it's not going to be detailed in telling my future, then I think I'd like to try it. Hermione?"
After a minute, Hermione gave in, still complaining about 'superstitious nonsense'.
Harry retrieved the Fortune Finder and some pieces of parchment from his room, while Ron asked Ginny for her cards.
Returning a few minutes after Ron, Harry settled down next to Hermione. Ron sat on the opposite bed.
"Who's going first?" Harry asked. Ron answered quickly that he would.
"I think we'll just do a one card pick for now. Harry said, holding the deck out to Ron. He took it, and shuffled the cards. Before he picked one, he suddenly looked up at Harry. "Harry," he said slowly, "wasn't your card Death? Stuff like 'making way for the new, transformation' and all?"
"Yeah, why?"
Ron grinned. "Transformation, you git! You got your 'new' thing, didn't you? You transformed. You're an Animagus!"
Hermione scoffed loudly. "Honestly, Ron. It's just a coincidence."
"Probably," Ron offered, "but it would be nice to think it was something more. Tarot is meant to be the most reliable branch of Divination, anyway."
He ran his eyes over the pack of cards, and finally picked one. He looked at it. "Oh."
"What did you get?" Harry asked, craning over to see.
"An upright Fool." Ron groaned, showing him. Hermione hid a smile.
Harry inserted the card and some parchment into the Fortune Finder, fumbling a little as he tried to find the holes in the sleek box.
An answer shot out right away.
Grabbing it before Ron, Harry read it out. "The Fool, Upright. Meaning: New beginnings, new adventures, new opportunities, unlimited possibilities, pleasure, passion, thoughtlessness, rashness."
"Well, we've got the thoughtlessness and rashness down." Hermione said dryly, and had the decency to look apologetic when Ron glared at her.
Inserting the card back into the pack, Hermione shuffled it and selected a card. She selected one and glanced at it. "Ace of Wands, upright." she said. "I suppose that's good, right?"
Ron nodded. "Bill said that upright ones are usually good luck, and upside down cards are usually bad. One or two of them work opposite, I think."
Hermione put the items in this time, and got ready to whack Harry's hands away - she did so, and caught the paper as it was thrown back out.
"Ace of Wands, Upright: A creative beginning, a new business venture, a profitable journey, an inheritance, a new career, a birth in the family."
"Wow, Herm', I think that's a real prediction." gaped Ron, "The business venture, profitable journey, career and creative beginning all fit in with your book."
"He's right." Harry added. "I think you may have picked a real one."
Hermione rolled her eyes. "Your turn, Harry."
Giving up trying to convince Hermione, Harry shuffled the card back into the pack. He decided on one near the bottom, and drew it from the pack.
"Four of Wands, reverse." he read. "New relationships possible, new goals, new ambitions, action." He looked at his two friends. "Sounds interesting."
"Sounds cool." Ron adjoined. "New relationships. Going to get yourself a girlfriend?"
Harry flushed a hot red and Ron started to snigger. Harry heard Hermione scold Ron for 'embarrassing poor Harry', but his mind was somewhere else. Was the new relationship with Cho Chang? Someone other girl? Was it even a relationship like that, or just a new friend?
Shaking the thoughts from his mind, he realised Ginny had just entered the room. "You two were up here ages." Ginny said, "What did you want those cards for, anyway?" She walked further into the room. "Oh, it's the Fortune Thingy. Can I have a go?"
Ron groaned. "Everyone wants a go now. Why couldn't you have one on the train?"
"Why couldn't you?" Hermione shot back. "Of course you can, Ginny." she said, and held the cards out to her.
Ginny re-shuffled them, faster than the other people and took one of the cards. She handed it to Harry, barely looking at it, and Harry put it in, making sure it was the way up it had been selected. A few seconds later, Harry picked up the parchment. "Ten of Cups Upright: A happy family life, true friendships, lasting happiness. I think that's the best one I've read so far." Harry smiled, making Ginny blush. Ron gave a small wolf-whistle, and Hermione punched him lightly on the arm. Giving a squeak of thanks, Ginny ran from the room.
Harry glanced once more at his watch. "We should be getting back. We have ten minutes left before nine." He pointed out to Ron.
Saying good-night to Hermione, the boys left for their own dorm, passing Lavender Brown and Parvati Patil, who were gossiping about 'how wonderful' it was to have Divination first thing in the morning.
"Are you going to take the Fortune Finder to Divination?" Ron asked, clambering onto his bed, and pulling the covers up around him.
"No, I don't think so." Harry yawned, and pulled out a quill. Dipping it in some ink, he brought out all the predictions of the Fortune Finder.
He didn't know why, but he felt compelled to write the dates on the papers, and who had drawn them, and possible ideas for their meanings; the Animagus form and the book. Placing them in his trunk, he fell into bed, and drifted into sleep.

~ ~ ~

Deciding that Monday was never going to be his favourite day with all the terrible lessons they had, Harry ran to the the breakfast table.
Slipping into the empty seat next to Ron, Harry hissed, "Why didn't you wake me up?"
"I did," said Ron, picking up his mug of pumpkin juice. "And you said 'Right Ron, I'll be up in a minute'. That was ten minutes ago." He took a swig of his drink.
"Oh." Harry reached out for the tongs to pick up some bacon with, but was stopped by a sneering voice. "Poor Potter. You were probably spending ten minutes working out how to get up."
Harry and Ron leapt up immediately, Hermione sighing in despair.
"I'm surprised you know how to get up, Malfoy." Harry snapped back. "You were probably spending the last two days trying to find a way to get off the train."
Hermione snorted into her mug, and Draco flushed. "You'd better watch it Potter. The Dark Lord's already taken one kiddie, don't want to be the next now, do you?"
"Why do you think that? Does Voldemort have nothing better to do than settle your scores?" Harry retorted. "Where are your flunkies, anyway? Did they get lost, or just grow a brain cell each and realise you're a pompous git?"
Ron was looking impressed at Harry's barrage of insults, and Malfoy was just looking angry. He recovered himself enough to mutter. "You'll end up the same as Diggory.", before leaving for the Slytherin table.
Fred and George looked astonished and delighted at Harry's display.
"Good one, mate!" Fred exclaimed, slapping Harry on the back as they passed, having finished breakfast. Harry and Ron sat back down, Harry feeling slightly embarrassed. "That was brilliant." Hermione said, trying to shut up a laughing Ron. "It looks like you can think really quickly on an empty stomach."
"Well, I don't want one anymore." Harry replied. "Pass the rolls."
Hermione gave him the bowl, and Harry set to work buttering one.
"I wonder where Crabbe and Goyle were though." she mused. "It's really strange that Malfoy and his cronies should disappear for a couple of days, then have Malfoy turn up but without the two others."
"Maybe he killed them." Ron suggested innocently, and dodged a light smack to the head.
"Well, it is weird." Hermione said, standing up. "I've finished. See you in Divination."
Ron and Harry choked on their food. "What?!" Harry cried hoarsely. "You're taking Divination?"
"I thought you quit for good?" Ron agreed, in shock.
Hermione looked annoyed. "Don't you know anything about how the school does O.W.Ls?"
Harry and Ron shook their heads. Hermione heaved a sigh. "The short version is, because I quit Muggle Studies properly, by going to Professor Dumbledore, I don't have to do it for O.W.Ls. However, because I didn't quit Divination properly, I just walked out, it's still on my schedule, which means I have to take it for O.W.Ls. I can't cancel it now, it's too late."
"Why don't you just skip class, and not do the Divination exam?" Ron queried, shoving more bacon in his mouth.
Hermione now looked outraged. "And fail? You've got to be joking. How would it look, every other exam passed, and naught percent on Divination? Besides, if I take it, I can get a maximum of four extra O.W.Ls."
Harry was lost. "How? We have ten minutes before lessons start, can't you explain?"
"Fine." said Hermione, sitting back down. "You can take each O.W.L in one of three levels - Lower, Intermediate and Higher. For the first two, if you pass, you get a single O.W.L. If you get Higher, you get two. Divination and Defence Against the Dark Arts are split into two sections. For Defence, it's split into Creatures and Curses, so there's a maximum of four O.W.Ls to get. With Divination, it's the same, although you choose two types of Fortune Telling from a list. So, if I can catch up, I can get an extra four O.W.Ls."
Ron looked thankful. "Well, that's good news then. As thanks for sticking up with that old bat, we can get at least two O.W.Ls, instead of one."
"That's only if you pass." Hermione corrected. "But it means you have more chance of getting one, though." She stood up again. "We still have eight minutes. I'm going now."
"See you there. Save us a couple of tables." Ron waved her off. As she left, he turned back to Harry. "Well, that'll draw the attention away from you, Harry. Trelawney'll be so busy insulting Herm's 'lack of inner eye', that she'll forget to have you snuff it a couple of hundred times."
"'Harry!'" Harry said, in a spooky voice, "'Your time is running short. You will die of exam stress, Harry! Beware, the Grim of low scores!'"
Ron, for the second time that day, was laughing hard enough to make tears run down his cheeks.

~ ~ ~

Trooping up to Divination, Harry and Ron listened to and laughed at Seamus Finnigan's and Dean Thomas' impressions of the Overgrown Stick Insect Of Doom.
Lavender Brown and Parvati Patil tutted at them each time, and soon the boys were getting the urge to throw them off the many flights of stairs they went up, which they managed to resist.
By the time they entered the classroom, they were five minutes late, and Hermione was the only student there. "It was pretty easy to save you a seat." she remarked, as they sat down, Ron to her left and Harry to Ron's left.
"Do not apologise for being late, my dears," Trelawney said mystically, "for I saw that you would be late, and prepared accordingly."
"In other words, she realised you weren't here yet and decided to wait for you." Hermione muttered to Ron and Harry, who had to cover their mouths to stop laughing.
Trelawney, unfortunately, caught sight of them, and thought they were shocked at her 'Sight'. "Yes, I had a Vision." she trilled dramatically. "And I knew just what to do."
"A vision of us being late, what excitement." Harry muttered under his breath.
"I decided," she announced, "that the few first lessons shall be to go over old Divination methods, to refresh your memory. Crystal gazing, tea leaves, palmistry and astrology."
There were a few groans from the students.
"I know, my dears, it is a pity, but we will be starting a new method afterwards."
Lavender and Parvati perked up, and looked slightly more cheerful, while the rest of the class gave despairing looks at each other. Trelawney glided over to the shelves.
"Each of you," she said, "Will select a partner, and each pair will take a crystal ball. You will take it in turns to see Visions."
("Or fog." Ron sniggered)
"You may begin."
"Partners?" Harry asked Ron, looking over to him.
"As long as you get the ball, yeah." Ron yawned, watching Neville Longbottom, who had partnered up with Hermione, lift the heavy ball.
Getting up, Harry collected the wanted item from the shelf, surprised at the weight - he'd never held one before; usually they were already on the tables.
He returned over to his table, and set the ball down. "I'll go first." he told Ron, who replied with, "Good for you."
Gazing into the murky depths for the next quarter of an hour made Harry realise that the only thing he would be seeing was a lot of blobby white stuff and his reflection.
"Here." Harry said, getting up. "Swap seats. It's your turn now."
"Did you see anything?" Ron asked drowsily, taking himself up off the table, where he had been sleeping.
"Well, I saw that I wouldn't see anything."
"Circular logic." the other boy pointed out, and took Harry's seat. "Okay . . I see a crystal ball. . ."
"And inside the ball?"
"Nothing of interest." Ron said, and went back to staring.
Five minutes later, Ron gave up, and played against Harry in a thrilling game of 'Stone, Parchment, Knife' under the table. It seemed that Ron was as good at this as he was at chess; he had some type of bizarre luck that made him win eleven out the fourteen times they played.
Harry forfeited the final one, as Trelawney rose from marking the third year students' death predictions.
"And now, my dears." she said, blinking owlishly. "I trust you have all finished?"
There were murmurings of assent from the boys and Hermione, and vigorous head nodding from Parvati and Lavender.
"Very well, then. Those who were not gazing should have been studying the formations of tea leaves and their meanings. One of you will put the crystal balls back, while the other will take two cups of tea. I had this already planned, so they are in the cupboard. No, Mr Longbottom, I put warming charms on them, they are not cold."
Harry took the crystal ball back to the shelf, silently complaining about why they had to get them out for half an hour, and then put them away again.
Returning to the table, Ron was already sitting down.
"You go first and get the Grim over with." Ron told him, handing Harry a cup. Taking it, Harry swilled it round three times, and started to drink. When he had finished, he pulled a face. "I don't think she did put warming charms on it at all. It's lukewarm."
Ron finished his tea at the same time. "My tea's perfectly warm. A bit too hot, actually. Are you sure?"
"I think I know what 'warm' tastes like. Okay, give me your cup." Harry said, passing his own over to Ron.
Ron took it, giving his cup to Harry. "I'll go first." Ron said, consulting his book. "Okay, you've got a big round stain at the bottom. . . that means problems with family. . . well, that can't be right."
"Anything else?" Harry coaxed, opening his own book.
"Yeah, you've got one that looks like bird - maybe it's something to do with your form - no, wait, it means 'hopes will not be realised'. Got any hopes?"
Harry shook his head. "Nope."
"Well, I think it's proof that I'm not a Seer." Ron sighed. "How's Herm' doing?"
Harry glanced over at Hermione and Neville. The boy was looking terrified, as Hermione told him something about his tea leaves, that obviously wasn't good news.
"She's fine." Harry told Ron.
"Well, at least someone's doing okay. Do mine now."
Harry looked at Ron's cup. "Aright, you've got three shapes. There's a sort of square one, which means. . . hang on. . . yeah, that's right. It means 'disappointment in a current love'. So unless you've got a secret girlfriend, I think that one's wrong.
"The second is a weird, misshapen blob; which is. . . okay, it isn't in the book. And the third one is a ring going around the bottom. That one means you're going to win a fight. Well, that's good news, now we can challenge Malfoy to a wizard's duel."
"Nah, it's only for me, not y-"
There was a sudden crash as Neville dropped Hermione's teacup, which smashed on the floor.
"Bet Trelawney didn't See that one coming." Harry muttered to Ron.
The professor swooped down with a dustpan and brush.
"Or maybe she did." Ron replied. Harry sneaked a look at Hermione and Neville. Hermione was scolding a terrified Neville for 'believing in unjustified, superstitious nonsense' and telling him that a silly prediction was no reason for him lose his nerve and break things. Harry wasn't sure whether Neville was scared of the prediction, or of a seething Hermione; it was probably both.
"What was it, my dears?" Trelawney said, magicing the broken remnants away.
Neville still looked scared, but he managed to stutter, "Hermione said that - that I would be hurt later today, by a creature and ice.
"She's probably right, Neville." Dean said seriously, managing to hold all but the tiniest of giggles. "We've got Care of Magical Creatures after Lunch. They'll probably throw you in the lake or something."
Neville gave a small squeak of terror, and Trelawney gazed down upon him. "Well, I wouldn't take that prediction too seriously." she said, then turning to Hermione and giving a small sniff. "It has been known for Divination to be wrong, for those with a distinct lack of Inner Eye."
Hermione flared instantly. "Perhaps you should blame Neville for drinking it wrong." she snapped. "Because I read it just as the book told me to, and that's how it came out. Perhaps you would like to read Neville's tea leaves, and tell us all what they really say?" She thrust the cup out to the professor, and glared at her.
Professor Trelawney took the cup without a second glance at her. "Certainly, I shall. If only to set things straight. . ." she lamented, and turned the cup this way and that in her hands. "Ah, I see. You must have mistaken the Book, meaning intelligence, for a Club, meaning an attack. And this, which I suppose you thought was the Tiger, implicating a dangerous animal; it's actually a Cat, showing affection and company. This one does look rather like a Snowflake, but it is, in fact, a Cobweb, showing entrapment.." She smiled at Hermione, who seemed in anything, to have gotten more furious. "So you see, my dear, it shows not an attack, but intelligence, company and, unfortunately, an entrapment. Perhaps," she said, turning back to Neville, "you should beware a girl who appears to be a friend, but really wishes to set you up." Giving the cup back to Hermione, she swept on. "If anyone would like help with their cups, feel free to ask me."
Neville breathed a sigh of relief, and settled back down in his seat.
"I don't believe it!" Hermione whispered loudly to Ron and Harry. "I k now what I read, that cow's just out to make me look bad because I walked out."
"We know Herm', just calm down." Ron whispered, leaning over. Harry looked in his cup. "At least you actually managed to fit your predictions together." he said. "Ours were rubbish."
The bell soon rang to signal the end of the single lesson, which meant they only had to put up with another hour of mind-numbing - sorry, interesting predictions.
After tea leaves, they continued on to palmistry, where Trelawney told Harry that his life line was astoundingly short.
Thirty minutes after that, they were finishing off with astrology. Harry, as a Leo, learnt that he would be dying very soon, courtesy of a freak accident - or so Trelawney said.
For ten minutes, Ron checked Harry's future, while Harry checked Ron's, ignoring the sounds of furious muttering and occasional whimpers from Hermione and Neville's table.
"Your horoscope for today." Ron declared, earning a whack to the arm. "Okay, okay, I'm starting. Well, early this week, due to the influence of Venus, you'll be lucky in love. However, there'll be problems after that, because of Mercury in the fourth house. You'll achieve a lot midweek, and your luck continues at the end of the week with excellent business. I guess in your case, it would be something to do with money." he amended hastily, putting the parchment down. "What's going to happen to me?"
Harry held up his predictions and read through. "Alright; at the start of the week, you're going to have an awkward emotional event, since Neptune and Mercury are going to align. Following on, the problem will be solved, but you should stick to normal habits. Finally, you'll have some good news at the end of the week."
There was a brief silence.
"Those really sucked." Ron said honestly.
"Yep." sighed Harry, putting his parchment down. "Well, we've got a few minutes until we switch Divination methods again. Want to talk about something?"
Ron sniggered. "Yeah, like why Hermione seems to have it in for poor Neville."
Harry turned to look at the pair. Neville was staring in horror at Hermione's parchment, while she muttered things like 'completely unreliable. . . what a fraud. . .' .
Sighing heavily, Harry turned back. "She's at it again." he groaned, "So, what do you want to do?"
Ron yawned, and leaned back in his chair. "I dunno."
They didn't have to decide; their time was up at that moment, and Trelawney rose to speak. "Now, although we also studied Pyromancy, it is a subject not usually taken, and so we will not be revising it. We have thirty minutes of class left, so you can make a start on your homework; on page two hundred and twelve, you will find the section on Tarot readings. We will be learning Tarot next lesson, so I want you to learn the three basic readings of one card, three cards and ten cards. You do not have to learn the cards or their meanings."
Sitting down, she continued with her work.
Harry blinked. "That was. . . strange."
"Did she actually have anything planned for this lesson?" Ron wondered aloud. He pulled his bag up from beside him and fished around in it, finally bringing up some writing material. "Best get cracking." he told Harry, who shrugged and did the same.
He flicked over the pages until he came to chapter thirty two. Picking up his pen, he started to take notes; the one card was simple - focusing on a question and picking a card. The three card spread was harder - they stood for past, present and future, and had to be picked and moved into a particular order. The ten card spread was more complicated; there were different meaning for each card, including the far and near past, the far and near future, the asker, the problem, the solution; they had to be in a certain pattern, or the reading would be incorrect. Just reading about it, made Harry's head hurt.

~ ~ ~

By the time that break came, and the Gryffindors left Divination, nearly half the students had minor migraines. Even Hermione, who seemed to be able to soak up information from twenty books without getting tired, was complaining of a headache and sore eyes. "Well, at least I have it memorised." she grumbled, resting in the common room. Harry looked up from his Divination book in amazement. "You memorised all of it?"
"No, I was lying. Of course I memorised it, that's what I said ." she moaned, moving her head into a more comfortable position on the cushion.
"Can you help me with mine, then?" Ron asked, laying his quill down. "I've got the first two, but I've only done three of the ten card layout."
"When my headache's gone." Hermione relented. "Maybe at lunch, or when lessons have finished."
Ron scowled. "What if we have more homework by then? And besides, I thought you were going to try you-know-what after lessons."
Leaving the pair to argue, Harry continued reading. He had already memorised the ten cards, and now had only to remember what order they went in. 'Far past, near past, problem, solution, asker, near future, far future, others, surroundings, and conclusion.' he repeated to himself, finally getting them in the right order. "Finished." he said, throwing the book down. "We've got twenty minutes left. I'm going to go down to the kitchens and see Dobby."
Ron groaned, "I don't know how you two do it..", and continued on, while Hermione just nodded.
After putting his book away, Harry slipped through the portrait hole and out of the common room, heading downstairs.