Disclaimer
The present FF7 characters are not mine (though I would like to own them :oP). It's also containing yaoi material, be sure to know what it means if you're going to read it, hehehe. I would like some feedback, so please… e-mail me!!! Those who have done it received gifts, so don't be afraid!!! Now enjoy…
Htress
htress@jenovaproject.com
This fic is dedicated to Silver Rayne, for her beautiful work, and it is also a follow-up of his fic SOLDIER
The last test
He could still hear Hojo's maniacal laughter in his head, an amused and demented one. He had put him through so much, even now, in the peace of his quarters, couldn't he be forgotten by this sadistic madman? The last test… it should have been easy, at least, bearable, how did he managed to get through days of pure torture? Every part of his body was hurt, if not bleeding or broken, his mind was scattered, continually hit by Hojo's image, his vision blurred by a faraway too much amount of Mako mixed with strange other substances. How did he came back, anyway? Sephiroth closed shakily the door before collapsing on the floor, succumbing under the last assaults of Hojo's hysterical laugh.
******
Zack hit the button in the tall-glass elevator, stepping aside two men engaged in a quite interesting discussion. One of them made shivers run down Zack's spine, especially when he said his puppy had passed the last test with success. President Shin-Ra congratulated the man wearing the lab coat as Zack stood out on the forty-second floor. He didn't heard Hojo adding that the General wouldn't be available for several weeks, due to the after-effects of the treatment he had received… In a way, it's a good news, Zack thought. He raised his pace, a bit worry about Sephiroth.
When he turned the handle, he was surprised that Sephiroth didn't lock it. It wasn't in his habits, he always locked the door. More, something was preventing it to fully open.
- General, sir, there is something blocking the door, I can't come in!, Zack called.
No answer. He pushed harder, moving the heavy thing that blocked the way and managed to slip inside. Everything was dark, the evening sky was covered by clouds and the dim lights of Midgar streets were offering a gloomy sight through the window. Zack closed the door and locked it. Maybe he's asleep… He carefully removed his boots and, discarding his buster sword, he gave a slight kick to the thing in front of the door. ?!? Sephiroth's boots? Those things aren't that heavy… unless… unless he's still wearing them!!!!!
- Sephiroth!!!
He switched on the lights to find Sephiroth, unconscious on the floor, battered and wounded, his black uniform torn to ribbons. Even his shoulder pads were cracked and the tip of his long silver hair was blood red. Zack fell on his knees, nearly burst into tears when he pulled Sephiroth on his lap. He could feel his broken ribs and even see them were the flesh had been slashed, blood still dripping on the floor in a small puddle.
- Seph… Seph… Wake up…, he said in a trembling voice, brushing away the blood running from the corner of his lips.
The General moaned weakly and opened his eyes as salty droplets fell on his forehead. His chest was burning, each intake of air was merely bearable, bringing each time more and more blood in his mouth.
- Seph… Let's put you to bed… I'll take care of you
Zack dragged the General to his bed, tearing his wasted clothes apart. Sephiroth was whimpering through the ordeal, making his friend extremely uncomfortable. Even his underwear was blood-soaked. He stepped back to look at his superior ; his whole body was a mess. Obviously, one of his leg have been broken, the right shoulder was dislocated and his side was badly slashed as well as his chest. Needle marks stained both forearms, bruises and deep cuts were covering the rest of his body. Blood was continually streaming from the mouth and nose, indicating a severe chest wound. Why… why do you have to suffer… Damn Hojo! Fearful eyes looked back at him when he waved aside silver strands from his face.
- It will be alright, I-I'll take care of you… Just stay still, okay? I'll be back.
Zack prepared a clean set of nightclothes and went to the bathroom, looking for antiseptic and bandages. With utmost care, he started to clean the wounds and replaced the bones in place. Sephiroth didn't resist long, and he soon returned to a total black-out state. He doesn't have any resistance left… Where is the Sephiroth I know? He should have kicked me by now… or at least tried. After he finished, Zack put him his nightclothes and drew the covers up to his neck. Will your pain stop one day, or is this going to last forever? With his hand placed firmly on Sephiroth's injured chest, he cast the strongest Cure spell he knew, but nothing happened. He closed his eyes and with all that was left in him, he cast it again, transferring all his will into a small green orb he was holding. Green light overwhelmed Sephiroth, soothing him at last. Emptied from his own energy, Zack slumped on the floor, allowing himself to rest a couple of hours.
******
A week later
Sephiroth's eyelids fluttered and a glimpse of green appeared on his face. Everything around him was dark, unless for the dim lights of the streets peering through the window. A hand passed on his cheek, smooth and warm, contrasting his own temperature which seemed to drop every second. Who is that? He saw only a wave of black hair. No… not him again… not this time.
- Hojo…
Zack didn't have time to react. A hand grip firmly his throat, cutting off his oxygen supply. He struggled to break free, but Sephiroth was strong, even with his Mako poisoning.
- I'm… not… Hojo…, Zack gasped
The grip loosen a little, allowing the dark-haired man not to choke.
- Who are you?
- Zack…
Zack… His hand let go of him, trembling, when another one pushed him back on his pillow. I can't keep to live like this… A pet, I don't have anything to me, I don't even know who I really am! I'm… loosing my mind… He nearly killed Zack, his only friend, just because he was looking like this crazy guy whose pride was to be called Professor. He felt trapped, unable to escape his dark visions. No matter how far he would flee, Hojo will find him and bring him back… to more tests. To more pain. He couldn't let this happen, not anymore. And there was only one way to end it.
- You have Mako poisoning and a fever… Seph, you need to rest.
Kind brown eyes looked down at him and Zack added :
- But I'm glad you're finally awake…
- I don't need your help, Zack. I can take care of myself. For what is left of myself… he thought.
- Like shit you can! If I weren't here, you'd still be sprawled on the floor!!! Hissed a worried Zack, Hey! Where do you think you're going!
- Bathroom.
Sephiroth crossed the room and stepped inside the bathroom, closing the door before Zack could follow him. He hoped he would understand. He hoped to be able to escape a fate that was making him an empty man, behind the façade of the perfect SOLDIER Hojo had made him. He had never known his parents, never had a childhood, never played with other kids, always aloof. No one ever cared for him. He was an empty shell, everything inside him was already dead, the rest was useless pain and humiliation. He held the thin razor blade over his wrist, looking at his flawless chest through the mirror, not even bearing one hell of a scar, and only God knows he should be covered with. Is this the only way to avoid the pain? I want it to stop… no more tests, no more pain, just the peace, a chance to be with myself… And I can't do this if that damn man is flying over my head like a demon to remind me… that I am his… I'm tired of all this, Hojo, Shin-Ra, useless battles… Everything ends now… Sephiroth took hold of the blade with his injured hand and cut through the flesh of his other wrist. Crimson liquid spilled out on the white tiles of the floor… I feel nothing at all… Strange. I'm finally breaking free… He just kept looking at the drips of blood on the floor, waiting the moment when he'll be too weak to stand, the moment when everything would go black, finally escaping this empty life.
- Seph… Seph you alright in there?
Sephiroth staggered backward, the sound of a worried voice coming from outside, dragging him back to reality… Zack… His name rose an image in front of the General's eyes, a sweet, kind smile, the only person to care about him, his only friend… I don't need your help… His eyes blurred with tears as he looked at his wrists, finding out how wrong he had been. He wanted to be held by those loving arms once more, maybe, maybe Zack could… Zack talked to him, cared for him, loved him, and still did… Maybe he could hang on him, accept his help and support… to trust him… His heart was crying out to do so, to bring back Zack next to him, to let him take care of him, like no one had done before.
- Zack… I'm so wrong… help me, Zack! Help me!
The door swung open and Zack appeared, horrified to see that broken man sitting between two small puddles of blood. He rushed to his sword to get his material and quickly healed the wounds. Zack understood something went terribly wrong while he was send to Junon, something that was sending his leader off balance. He kneeled down before Sephiroth, his face unreadable as he took hold of his shoulders, unwillingly shaking him.
- For God's sake, Sephiroth!!! What is happening to you? What have they done to you… Tell me, for God's sake, don't you see where it's pushing you? TALK DAMNIT!!! Seph… you there?
But Sephiroth couldn't talk. Instead, he buried his face into Zack's shirt, shivering from a fever that took over him completely. Again he saw Hojo's sadistic smirk threatening him and he trembled violently before fainting.
******
It's here, somewhere, I just know it! Zack was rummaging through the lab, knowing that Hojo recorded every test he run on anybody or anything. If he could just find it… he could understand. Everybody was gone, unless that lousy guard who let him in… It was better that way, or he would have ended knocked-out on his night shift. He returned a pile of folders and opened the small box under. The tapes.
******
Zack was white as a sheet when he came back, groping his way to the bathroom to throw up. Nothing has prepared him to see that. It had taken all his will to leave the tapes and the lab intact. How can he do this to a man… That guy's a nutcase… He splashed his face with cold water, trying to find a sense to all of this. Useless, sadistic. The only words he could find to describe it. And it lasted four days. Bestially assaulted by monsters, battered, raped, drugged, forced to fight and overdosed with Mako. And he managed to survive, more, to come back home. All by himself, with a broken leg. He's not able to take anymore of this. No wonder he tried to kill himself… Oh Sephiroth… Is there a way I can soothe your scattered soul?
Zack walked wearily toward the bedroom and sat on the edge of Sephiroth's bed.
- Sephiroth…
- You okay? He mumbled
Zack looked at him and nodded, but he couldn't hold back anymore his tears of anger. The General shuddered, the dept in those brown eyes reflected determination and vengeance. He knows… I can see it, he knows… Tears streamed down Sephiroth's cheeks, he was ashamed to cry before his friend, but he couldn't help. He needed to talk.
- I-I, Zack, he started with a strangled voice, I feel like I'm dead… My life is empty, I am empty… You were right… I-I'm nothing more than a pet to test on…
Zack slipped under the covers and pulled Sephiroth into his arms, slightly trembling, and kissed him on the cheek. What he needs most for now is kindness. He's exhausted, physically and mentally., he thought as he stroke gently silvery strands.
- No, not to me, I love you, Seph, and I'll never stop loving you… You're my sunshine, my angel, my life, I'll always be there for you. And I know that, deep inside, you feel the same… Now rest, please, and as soon as you'll be better, I'll bring you back to the living world…
Sephiroth didn't struggled inside those strong arms, knowing that they brought only security and warmth. Zack reached for the bedside table and grabbed the wet cloth to put it on Sephiroth's forehead. They fell asleep, entangled together in the darkness of the room.
******
As soon as the General seemed to have recover from his Mako poisoning, routine test resumed. Zack saw him dressed and follow some creepy-looking lab assistant, without even arguing, submitting again. That was hours ago. And he was worrying sick, fearing that Sephiroth could just impale himself on the Masamune on his way back. But he doubted the General remembered he tried to kill himself, anyway, he couldn't be sure because Sephiroth never talked about it.
The door finally opened and stepped in Sephiroth, his face inexpressive as usual as he got rid of his trench coat. He wearily walked to the kitchen and sat on a chair. Zack followed, knowing that something was amiss. Sephiroth was in a very depress mood, his eyes lacked the brightness that usually made them shine. Zack embraced him from behind, a gesture that the General somehow got used to so he wasn't stiffening anymore.
- Zack… Let him… Tell him… I… My head hurts like hell, he said in a deep voice.
It was good to see Sephiroth drop his walls. Zack stroke gently his hair before starting to massage his leader's shoulders.
- You're tensed, he stated, you should relax more often… Maybe a bath will do you some good, how about it?
He didn't expect an answer, knowing that Sephiroth was about to tell him to leave him alone. Sure, he talked a little more of what he was feeling, but Zack could rarely get him to bend to his caring. So when Sephiroth stood and nodded, he joyfully ran to the bathroom to prepare a bath. His leader came back draped in his silky green bathrobe, silver hair brought up in a high ponytail, bangs brushing his cheeks at each step. A low neckline exposed his ivory chest and a fancy golden buckle held the garment closed to the waist. Zack could feel he was about to have a serious nose bleeding problem if he kept looking at this breath taking vision. Then he saw Sephiroth undo his buckle and the silk slid down on the floor, revelling the pure beauty of heaven. That was just too much for Zack, and he couldn't hold back a low moan.
- Dear Lord… Seph… Warn me next time you're planning on doing this… Unless you want me to…
He was aware that his pants were becoming tighter at each second, and when Sephiroth got in the water, he picked up his bathrobe and hung it on a handle bar nearby, trying to hide his growing bulge. He was about to leave when he heard Sephiroth sigh. Zack turned.
- Wanna talk? He asked.
- … Would you stay… Please?
Please?!? Zack sat down next to the tub and waited. Then Sephiroth sighed again.
- Zack, I mean… in the tub.
That's too much… does he trusts me? After what happened to him? It was as if a lightning had hit Zack. He was stunned beyond imagination. It took several minutes for him to truly understand but he finally stepped out to get his own bathrobe. A knock on the door prevented him to go back to his leader. He warned Sephiroth and answered it. Uh-oh… Troubles…
- Miss Scarlett? Sorry, but the General isn't in the mood, I guess.
- There's no way he could avoid this, Hoeken, she spat, waving a handful of paper under his nose, And where is the General?
- Sleeping, and if you keep doing noise like that, you'll wake him up, and believe me, I won't be around anymore to see what will become of you if it happens, he added, pointing the Masamune resting next to the door.
Scarlett seemed to believe his story and she stopped yelling at Zack's face before handing him other reports and manifolds.
- Then, give him those too, and tell him to do his job! Shin-Ra doesn't pay him to sleep!
She left and Zack closed the door, grimacing behind it, arms full of paperwork. He flung them on the nearby table and headed back to the bathroom. He undressed and hopped in the water, next to Sephiroth. It was hot, and the bath oil he used was diffusing a mild scent of lavender, but the fact that the most beautiful man was naked at his side tensed Zack despite all his efforts. He was more surprised when Sephiroth pulled him by the shoulders, leaning him on his chest.
- God, Seph, he purred, you wanted to hold me… since when? And why on earth did you wait that long…
- I… don't know, he paused, his tone becoming nervous, Zack, will you always be there for me?
- Yes… I can't believe it…
The embrace tightened and Zack felt his leader's head leaning over him.
- Thank you… I-I think… I love you, Zack…
Zack's heart jumped out of his chest when he heard Sephiroth, and he nearly fainted when sensual lips brushed his own in a feathery movement. When they parted, Zack was slightly trembling. Sephiroth just told him…
- Will you be mine tonight? The silver hired man asked
- I'm already, you silly…
He heard Sephiroth gasp and sensed him stiffen, his head still resting on his shoulder. Zack turned abruptly, alarmed when he saw Sephiroth loosing his colours.
- Hey! Seph, you okay?, he asked brushing his hand on his face.
- Head hurts…, he growled back
- I bet it does… Right now you're burning with fever, Zack scolded as he got out of the tub, I'm afraid you're relapsing… come, I'll put you to bed.
He held up the silk garment in front of him and helped Sephiroth to get dressed. By the time they walked out of the bathroom, the General leaned on his second, needing support to reach his bedroom. At the same time, the main door opened and stepped in the President Shin-Ra, his son and Professor Hojo himself. Zack reacted quickly, murmuring instructions to Sephiroth.
- Lie down and don't move, whatever I'm going to do.
Then he scrambled off for the living room.
- Hum, I'm sorry, sirs, but the General is very busy and he doesn't want to be disturbed…
- I'm greatly doubting that, Hoeken, interrupted Hojo, tell me the truth…
- …… he's unconscious in the kitchen.
Hojo ran to the kitchen, leaving Zack to answer the President's questions
- What happened?!?
- I-I don't know, sir… I was in the tub when I heard a thud, so I went to check it out and I found him… And I heard you come in. That's all I know, sir!
- That's not good, that's not good at all…
Hojo came back with a worried look, pushing his glasses up his nose nervously. He scribbled some words on a note pad and gave the sheet to Zack. He looked at the President, who moved toward the door with his son. Then they left, Hojo saying that he would be back soon with something to treat his fever. Zack read the note.
Complete bed rest for the week
Prescribed
ASA t-330 twice a day
DHG4 two twice a day
Simon Hojo
He put it on the table and went back to check on Sephiroth. He was completely still on the floor, eyes closed and he was so pale he looked like a porcelain doll in his bathrobe. Zack carefully sat him.
- It's okay, Seph, they're gone, now you need to go to bed, and quick because Hojo will come back…
Sephiroth shuddered.
- Don't worry, I won't let him take you to his lab or hurt you. If he tries, I'll personally kick his butt out of the window, he said, leading him to his bed and tucked him in, Now just rest and let Zack take care of the things…
Trust him… Sephiroth closed his eyes, desperately wanting to escape the present moment… the soft caresses that Zack gave him made him slip into a peaceful sleep.
*******
Few days later, Sephiroth was back to normal, although he was still having bouts of fever. That was a good thing, because Zack wasn't scheduled to go anywhere this week… And his superior had changed from a cold stone to a warm cuddler. Useless to say that Zack was living in a dream. They were spread on the couch, watching lazily the first snowflakes fall on the window. It was good, just to lie here with nothing to worry about unless the fact that you're feeling well. Sephiroth was absently stroking Zack's hair, his thoughts whirling like the white sparkles that twirled in the air. For how long did I loved him without even knowing it? Oh, I love him so much… and I know he's longing for me… maybe I could just…
- Zack… he whispered tenderly, I want you…
He reached to capture Zack's lips with his own, giving him the sweetest kiss he'd ever had. Zack moaned deeply, Sephiroth turned out to be as skilled at kissing as he was at fighting… Being stronger than his second, the General easily cradled him in his arms to lead him on his bed, kissing him again with a passion that made Zack literally melt. When they broke the kiss, the dark-haired man was panting heavily. They quickly got rid of their clothing and Sephiroth leaned over his lover, rubbing their erection together. While Zack explored his body with his lips, Sephiroth began to slick his fingers with a hand cream he kept in his nightstand.
Zack felt himself being pushed back on the bed, and while his lover was kissing and licking his way up to his ear, a finger nudged at his entrance, causing him to cry out in ecstasy. He waited so long for this, and it felt so good it hurts. As a second and third pushed into him, he arched forward, meeting Sephiroth's hips.
- Seph… oh god, Seph… I-I can't stand it anymore! Take me now! He pleaded
He was silenced by a hot kiss and the finger teasing him withdrew to be replaced by Sephiroth's throbbing erection. Zack screamed in pleasure as he sensed his lover buried himself up to the hilt. He pulled on the long silver strands asking for another kiss. The first thrust send him back down on the mattress, shuddering and begging for more. Sephiroth was panting heavily, a thin layer of sweat covering him as he slowly increased the pace, teetering on the brisk of climax.
- Seph… Oh god… Seph… Ah!… don't stop!
The thrust became hard and deep, seeing Zack begging and clenching the sheets in pure bliss was just too much for the General. He let go a low growl as he came, sending his load into the heat that was Zack, who immediately followed, his spurts landing on their chests. Sephiroth slumped on the bed, whispering softly to Zack's ear that he loved him more than everything else before passing out. The dark-haired man managed to cover them with the blankets before rejoining his lover in dreamland.
******
Zack was wearily putting on his uniform, under the concerned look of the General. Must've caught it from Sephiroth… he thought.
- You shouldn't go. You're not looking good. Not at all.
He waved his hand in protest when Sephiroth came to check upon his temperature. Zack was flushed and his breath was short. He picked up the phone. The dark-haired man was waving back and forth, eyes closed when he felt Sephiroth unbuckle his shoulder pad, his belt and trousers. Next thing he'll remember should be a vague impression to be carried hurriedly to his bed.
******
When he woke up, he found himself tucked in his bed, shivering even with the covers pulled up to his neck. He searched for Sephiroth, called him, but got no answer. He shifted his gaze to the bedside table, where a note was purposely lay over a glass of cold water. There was also a damp cloth and a bottle of pills. He took the letter, recognizing the handwriting.
Dear Zack,
I have been called by Hojo for some routine tests. I left spare blankets next to you, so if you're cold you won't have to go fetch them. I guess you noticed what was on the nightstand if you read this note… You can take the week off, I arranged your schedule, so try to rest as much as you can.
Don't worry about me, I'll be fine. I can almost hear you ask why I'm still going to see that freak… Few weeks ago I would answered you to shut up… Today I found out why I was doing it. Not for Hojo, not for Shin-Ra, not even for me, I do it for you.
I thought I had nothing in this life, until I discovered that I loved you that day, when you saved me from myself. I owe you so much and, thanks to you, I know that there is something Hojo or Shin-Ra will never be able to take from me : my love for you. You were there when I needed you, even if I didn't want to, and now it is you who need me. Don't worry, I'll be back soon, for you.
Love and kisses,
Sephiroth
Zack folded the letter and slipped it under his pillow before spreading some other blankets over himself. He opened shakily the small bottle and swallowed two pills along with the glass of water. He suddenly felt a gloved hand on his chest, pushing him down as another one grabbed the empty glass. Zack cracked a smile as he was tucked again.
- Love you, Seph…
- Love you too, Zack
End