Disclaimer
Let's just skip this, okay? I'm getting tired...
Yaoi warning, don't own, no money… I know everybody wants to know what's wrong with Reno, so I'll stop babbling. Enjoy!
Htress
htress@jenovaproject.com
Reno's secret
- Crap! Too late, Rude! He's throwing a fit! Damn, damn, damn! Everybody, get out of his way!, Elena shrieked.
They all obeyed, clearing the floor near the fallen Turk. His body was twisting and convulsing, it was very pitiful to see. After several minutes he stopped and Rude plunged a small cylinder into his thigh, pushing a precise amount of drug into his companion. Reno was trembling and the bald man mentioned to everyone not to touch him for at least ten minutes. Rufus was the first to break the silence.
- What happened? Is Reno alright?
- Not quite, sir…, Elena answered, he had a bad seizure, the worst I've ever seen. Although I think Rude saw the worst he'd ever had.
- Sir, what about Tseng?
Rufus closed his eyes and took a deep breath.
******
All I remember is standing before the window of my office, staring at the Diamond weapon. The Sister Ray fired and there was a blinding flash. I woke up in a Mako tank. Quickly I realised that I wasn't alone. Tseng was behind me, holding me tight. I struggled to break free but all I succeeded to do was shooting a wave of sheer pain through my body. And I screamed.
- Don't move, sir, he told me, you are injured. If you try to stand on that leg, it will break. Just lean against me.
Just then Hojo walked in. You've seen him before? Well, he's even uglier now. Didn't think it was possible, but anyway. He tapped on the glass with his usual smirk, tracing weird patterns with his bony fingers.
- How touching…
- Hojo you stupid jerk, Tseng hissed, you could have at least healed him!
He just cackled and I could swear I felt Tseng shudders behind me. He looked at us with mad eyes and it was my turn to shiver.
- It would make the experiment worthless, my dear Turk. When I'll revive JENOVA, we'll see if she can do something with this specimen's frail bone structure. And beside, it will prevent him and you from going away. Anyway, it's sleeping time…
He pressed a button and everything turned black. Days passed. Hojo was sometimes feeding us by inserting a sort of broth in a tube that went directly into our stomachs. Sometimes he wasn't even there, leaving us with monsters as guards. He was particularly fussing over a hatch of snakes. He was somehow able to control them, along with the monsters he was creating. He brought them along whenever he was going out.
Tseng was always provoking Hojo. One day I asked him why and he answered me that he wanted to be taken out of the tank so he could try to escape. He said that if he could get to contact you, Elena and Reno he could take me out. And then it happens.
Someday Hojo decided to make some experiments on Tseng. He tranquilized him, but Tseng managed to resist and escaped. Immediately Hojo ran out of the lab with his monsters, leaving me on the automatic run. He came back maybe two or three days later. Alone. With Tseng gone, I had to support myself with my two legs and even with the Mako numbing me, it hurt like hell. He rummaged through the lab and I found enough strength to speak.
- Where's Tseng?
He didn't even looked at me.
- You heard me you f*%ing freak, where is he?
- My, my, so much energy in you all of a sudden…, he mocked me, It seems that our specimen needs to sleep a while… and since you want to know so badly, your Turk friend is dead. As dead as my dear son, I'm afraid… now sleep well, because I'll come back.
That was the last time I saw him.
******
- And you probably found me and brought in your house because you are the first I saw, Cloud.
- In fact, Vincent and Yuffie found you. And this is not my house. It's Sephiroth's.
They were interrupted by the sounds of a chopper landing nearby. Some people came to take care of Rufus. While they were strapping him on a stretcher, Rude and Elena were to decide whether or not going with him. Rude wanted to go find Tseng but Elena was insisting that at least two of them should go with Rufus and the President. Tifa solved the dilemma.
- I'll stay with Rufus, Elena you just have to stay with Reeve.
So the three of them left with Rufus and headed for Midgar. Rude and Sephiroth settled the now out cold Reno on the couch. Next step was to decide who was going to go rescue Tseng. While Cloud was debating with the plans Sephiroth had drawn, Rude took the silver-haired man apart.
- Could you do me a favour? I'm worried about him. Me and Elena… since he learned Tseng's death… he keeps all inside, he won't talk to me like he used to do…
- What do you want me to do?
- Stay with him. Talk to him about the sector 7 incident, or Tseng or anything that can make him angry or sad… No offence, but since you're the one… just that fact may push him to do something other than slip away like that…
Sephiroth nodded as Cloud dismissed everybody for the night.
******
Reno groaned. The familiar sensation of being numb and limp told him he probably threw a fit and a severe one, by the way his head was throbbing. He shivered, the place was a little cool, the fire reduced to glowing embers in the fireplace. An odd scent was floating in the air, somehow vaguely familiar too so Reno made his way groggily to the kitchen.
Sephiroth was making bread while a bunch of ginger cookies were baking in the oven. He watched silently as the silver-haired man put two round patties together in a mould and cover it with a damp wash cloth. Then the timer ringed and he retrieved his cookies, biting in one right away. He was insane… killed much more than everybody… And there he is, /baking/ for God's sake!!! He buried his head in his hands.
- Why can't I do that…
- Do what?
Reno lifted his gaze up to meet Sephiroth's. He hadn't realized he'd said the last part aloud. Right now, he was feeling like falling apart, but fought back the urge to burst into tears. He noticed also that the house was awfully quiet.
- Where are the others? He asked.
- You didn't answer my question. What can't you do?
- It's none of your business, anyway.
- Is too!
- Is not!
- Is too!
- Is not!
- Is not!
- Is too!
- So answer me!
- Arrrrgggh! I don't want to! I don't /want/ to talk about this…
- Reno, it'll free you…
- Screw you…
******
I never wanted to do this… President Shinra never told us it would destroy completely sector 7. He told us to shut down the sector. As I set up the generator to cut off all power sources, it declutched a hidden explosive mechanism… I realized too late that it couldn't be reversed. Cloud always thought I did it on purpose, though. All those people were going to die… because of me… So I stayed on the pillar. I didn't want to live with that… I still can't cope with it, ya know… and when Cloud showed up, I just gave him the impression I was fighting back but… all I wanted was to die. It's funny… I've killed many people, but somehow they looked like they deserve it, it didn't mattered to me. And then… when your blond partner was about to finish me… Tseng appeared with the flower girl. I remember how terrified he looked when I jumped off the pillar… It was the first time I really saw him afraid, I think… As I was flying down… it was beautiful… the rain of fire… I barely felt my body hitting the concrete and I saw everything coming down on me…
The next time I opened my eyes, I expected to be dead, floating in the Lifestream or rotting in Hell, but no! I was in a f%?&ing hospital… Tseng, Elena and Rude were there. I wasn't able to answer their questions… They were so worried, and I was so f?&%ed up… Tseng took them out and came back, embracing me, kissing me, saying he loved me and asking me why on Earth I wanted to die… That I didn't deserve to die… Maybe he was right, it was too good for me to simply die, but I didn't deserve to live either.
When I was freed from the hospital, Tseng took me back to our apartment… and I saw through the window the remnant of was used to be the sector 7. And it happen. My legs just gave out and I fell on the floor, clutching my head. I swear I could hear them scream in agony, accusing me, cursing me, and I was hardly able to hear Tseng over all that screeching noise. After that he didn't want to leave me alone. At first I was having fits like that pretty often, but never serious like the first one. Anyway, whenever he had to quit he would have Rude or Elena with me and a capsule of tranq. Slowly, I was going over it, I knew Tseng was behind me, supporting me whatever I did. I was feeling like I could live again.
But one day Tseng didn't came back. Rude told me he was dead, and he said to me later that the fit I threw then scared the hell outta him. I had lost the only one who was able to pull me out of my depression. My world chattered and now here I am… I didn't changed since then…
******
- And now I'm seeing you here, the mighty one who tried to crush down the Planet, doing nothing more than /baking/… How do you do that? How did you come over all you did? Don't you have any remorse…?
Sephiroth smiled.
- A certain flower girl told me after my defeat that everybody can make errors… But not everybody can be strong enough to look at them and accept it. Myself haven't been able to face it after JENOVA died, and I let Cloud kill me. By doing this, I doomed my soul. But being manipulated almost all my life, Aerith sent me back and with Cloud's help, I was able to forgive myself for what I have done. It felt bad, at first but now, now I'm at peace with myself for the first time in my life. Do you understand, Reno?
The redhead nodded, his face a little paler than before. Sephiroth gestured him to the living room. Reno sat back on the couch and found out that his eyelids were becoming heavier at each second. In a matter of minutes, he was fast asleep again. Sephiroth poked at the embers, added some logs and with a little smile returned to the kitchen. Aerith… you and your big ears… I'm surprised that the Lifestream isn't scolding you yet! And for a second he thought he could hear his light laughter in the silence of the house.
End
Author's note
A little Reno interlude! What do you think of it? The poor little thing, I was just wondering why he jumped off the pillar… What is Aerith gonna do? I'll give you a hint : it's a dream. Now stay tuned for the next chapter: Return from Wutai.