Author's note: When in Ranma's or John's POV, I will use he/his/him to describe them, even in cursed form. After all, that's how they think of themselves, ne?
***Disclaimer: Ranma 1/2 belongs to Rumiko Takahashi and her licensees. Used without permission for nonprofit entertainment. Go buy some copies of the manga and anime, it'll keep 'em out of my hair.***
"That's it!" Ranma growled. "Time to finish this! Kachu Tenshin Amaguriken!" Her fists blurred as she used the technique, delivering hundreds of blows in seconds.
"Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire!" John called as his hands blurred and he blocked most of the hits. Out of five hundred blows, only two hundred twenty-five connected. Panting, he held his side and smirked at the wide eyes around him. Then, his eyes rolled up into his head and he passed out, falling into the koi pond.
Soun and Genma whispered excitedly to one another. Then, with maniacal grins on their faces, they rushed into the house and disappeared. Ryoga stood up and calmly walked into the dojo.
From where she sat with Russ's head in her lap, Nabiki looked on with interest. Finally, she thought. Now I can see what sort of demand there's going to be for "John-chan" photos. The way he goggled when he saw me in the dojo means I should be able to wrap him around my little finger. A little cleavage, a little show of leg, and he's putty in my hands. A predatory smile graced her features as she visualized an American version of Ranma-chan with brown hair dressed in some of the racy outfits Ranma had completely refused while Nabiki herself took pictures surrounded by an obscene amount of money.
Then, she noticed the battle aura surrounding herself, and her own insane giggling. Better stop that, she thought, clamping down with her normal icy control. Wouldn't do for anyone to have seen that. She looked around, suddenly realizing that she had missed something. Ranma had pulled John-chan from the pond and was helping Akane carry her into the dojo. Worse, Nabiki hadn't gotten a good look at the neo-girl. Nabiki rapidly made what assessment she could from where she sat.
Darn, she thought. Little sister, you just had to be in the way. Akane held John-chan's upper body, while Ranma had hold of her legs. Beyond that, Nabiki could only tell that John's current form wasn't much larger than Akane. As gently as her contract would allow, she set Russ down on the ground. She smirked as she rose from her position by the pond, already scheming. Checking her camera, she realized she needed more film. Moving rapidly, she headed to her room to get it.
Unnoticed in the garden, Russ was beginning to stir, and Ryoga had already gotten lost.
*****
Finally reaching the dojo, Ranma-chan and Akane brought John's unconscious cursed form over to the futon that Kasumi had ready. She was waiting with a bowl full of water and a washcloth, ready to play the angel of mercy as she had so many times before. At her direction, they set John-chan down next to the futon, Ranma releasing her legs, and Akane gently lowering her upper body to the floor. The borrowed bandanna had slipped down and covered her face.
Ranma was nervous. He didn't think he'd hit John that hard. I mean, he thought, if he can pull off a Kachu Tenshin Amaguriken, then he's gotta be pretty good, right? He reviewed the fight in his mind. John had displayed amazing skills for someone who had said he'd only been practicing martial arts for three weeks. Waitaminute. He's only been practicing for three weeks! Ranma relaxed. He knew what was wrong, now. He's got the skills, but not the conditioning!
"Oh, dear," Kasumi said while checking John's vitals. "She seems to be exhausted."
"He, Kasumi," Akane muttered absently.
"Of course, little sister," Kasumi said cheerfully. "let's get these wet clothes off of he- er, him, so he doesn't catch cold." With that, she reached for the bandanna.
Akane glared at Ranma. "Get going, Ranma, leave this to us girls." She grabbed Ranma's shoulder and began to gently "escort" him from the room, when Kasumi removed the bandanna.
"Oh, my!" Kasumi exclaimed. "John-chan looks just like you, Akane!" She blinked and looked back and forth between John and Akane. Akane just stood in shock. Ranma recovered quickly.
"Aw, man," he said. "Poor guy. He fell in the Spring of Drowned Uncute Tomboy." Oh, shit, he thought suddenly. The ol' Saotome foot-in-mouth technique again. Nervously, he turned to Akane, whose battle aura was at full power.
"Ranma you jerk!" she shouted and punched him hard in the upper arm. She looked down at John, and her aura winked out suddenly. A concerned frown tugged at the corners of her mouth.
Wow, Ranma thought. She's really out of it. Normally, I'd be on my way to the canal by now. "Um, Akane, you okay?" he asked.
"I-I don't know," Akane said weakly. Tears formed in her eyes. Ranma gulped.
"There ain't no need ta cry, Akane!" Hesitantly, he moved to hug her, and winced when their breasts brushed each other. He'd forgotten he was still a girl at the moment. Much to his surprise, she returned the hug fiercely. He had been hugged hard before, but he had never initiated the contact like this. Unlike when Shampoo glomped him, this felt right. Drawing courage from her response, he pulled her in closer and patted her back. Looking over to Kasumi, he saw her beaming at him. She gestured to him to continue, so he did. "Everything's gonna be okay."
"But it's not, Ranma," Akane said softly. "His life is ruined. Who'd want to turn into me whenever he was splashed with cold water?" Resting her chin on Ranma's shoulder, she began sobbing softly. "Damn that bitch, Kiima!"
Aw, man, Ranma thought. What am I gonna do? I ain't no good with these situations! He nervously looked around and only saw Kasumi pulling a blanket over John's body. The gi John had been wearing was in a sodden pile next to her. Well, that's taken care of, I guess. Ranma took a deep breath.
"Akane," he said, cupping her chin in his hand, "as nice as it is to hug ya, if our folks saw us like this we'd be married by morning." Akane's eyes widened, and she scooted away quickly, drying her tears. She smiled softly.
"Thanks, Ranma," Akane said. "Maybe you're not such a jerk after all."
"An' maybe you're not uncute, either." Ranma said. "You're still a Tomboy, though."
"Rannnnmaaaa!" Akane hissed.
"Whoa! Easy, Akane!" Ranma said. "We got somebody sleepin' over there." He pointed at John.
"Yes," Kasumi interrupted. "We should let John-chan sleep, and supper's almost ready. Akane, could you set the table? Good. Ranma, could you let everyone know supper will be ready in five minutes? Good!" Ranma and Akane jumped and quickly complied.
After all, Ranma thought, who can say "no" to Kasumi?
*****
Ken Bakker was pissed.
His arrival in Nerima was supposed to have been a glorious paen to his greatness. Instead, he'd been ridiculed and humiliated. His skills had been belittled by that... boy, Ranma. He would have won that sparring match if Ranma hadn't cheated. Just like Ryoga did. I'm a black belt, dammit! he thought. That's supposed to count for something, right? He'd trained hard for five long years, an hour after school, then work, five days a week. He'd won state and regional tournaments. He was twenty-one years old; in the prime of life, even!
He was also, at the moment, a small furry creature. Again.
He had gratefully followed directions to the kitchen for some hot water, and had rapidly put his clothes on. He had learned the technique from Ryoga, and Kasumi had barely blinked before he had poured the hot water on himself and dressed. He chose to ignore the fact that he'd put his underwear on backwards for now.
He'd grabbed a glass of water and began to drink. Watching a good fight is thirsty business, he'd thought. Then, just as he'd gotten one swallow down, Soun and Genma had dashed through and caused him to spill water all over. The result: two pandas, one red and one giant, and one wet martial arts sensei. Ignoring Ken and the transformations completely, the older men had continued whatever mad scheme they'd concocted, blubbering words he didn't understand.
I wonder what "in a zoo key," "kay kong," and "day she" mean, anyway, he thought. From what John had told him about what to expect, he rather expected that two of those meant "fiancee" and "wedding," or something similar. Sighing, he put the thought out of his mind and began gathering his clothes. The task was made much harder by the lack of fully opposable thumbs, and he grumbled as best he could with his current vocal abilities.
I hope this doesn't happen again, he thought. There's only enough hot water left in the kettles for one... His eyes narrowed as a black paw shot through the kitchen doorway and snagged the last kettle. ...Transformation.
In rage and desperation, he thought the only thought that came to him. Ranma, this is all your fault! Then, he blinked. No, it's not Ranma's fault, but damned if I know just whose fault it is. He nodded to himself, as though this made sense. Anyhow, I still gotta get that cheating bastard, Saotome!
Full of pride and determination to make Ranma's life miserable, he scampered out of the kitchen.
*****
Russ looked around and tried to orient himself. He was human. Check. He was by the koi pond. Check. He was also completely alone. He sighed. Check.
With a quick motion, he kipped up from flat on his back to his full, upright and locked position.
Russell Wood, he thought to himself, you are just too witty for words. Heh.
"Now," he said. "Where is everyone?" Looking around, he spotted movement in the dojo. He quickly made his way over, and saw two figures walk out. One was a petite, well built redhead dressed in Chinese clothes and the other was... John's cursed form? Dressed in a school uniform? He was flabbergasted, until he remembered meeting her before the fight.
That has to be Akane, he thought. Which makes the redhead... Ranma? The clothes matched, and it seemed logical in light of the concentration of Jusenkyo curses in the area. Russ fought down a surge of disappointment. Another hot girl he couldn't date because she was really a guy. He wouldn't even try with Akane; John had said she was hot-tempered, and Russ could only look at her and see John, anyway. I mean, they move exactly the same in girl form! I'm gonna have to be very careful around here. He smirked a little. Bakker's gonna get so pounded here. The little furball has been asking for it since Jusenkyo, anyway.
Putting his skills at observation to the test, he watched the pair as they walked to the house, then parted ways. Okay, first off: they are both at least dan-ranked martial artists. Akane's probably fourth- or fifth-dan in at least one style, if not more, and Ranma is beyond my ability to estimate. Next: they care deeply about one another, but are unsure of how to proceed. The close proximity and nervous intimacy was a dead giveaway. His smirk widened into a huge goofy grin. Oh, boy! I get to play matchmaker! He hadn't had a chance to pair people off since high school. He remembered his numerous successes in getting cute couples together. Unfortunately, it seemed he could only use his matchmaking skills for others, and not himself. He sighed.
Planning and scheming, for the greater good, of course, Russ walked into the dojo.