Disclaimer: Now, I do not own Shannara, or the characters below (atleast
not most of them.)
The Four Lands were in peace. The Elven Kingdom had sent two-dozen of their own to study as druids at Paranor. Bek Ohmsford and Rue Meridion were being engaged and Panax, the first dwarf to not get K.O.ed in Shannara, was learning how to get that magnificent bronze tan that the inhabitants of Pakaris had acquired. As all these events transpired, one was the most important-Grianne's journey back from the Valley of Shale.
The former Isle Witch shuffled her large feet on the stone path. Moonlight led her path. Tripping over a rather large stone lying in the middle of the road, Grianne was sprawled on all fours.
A sharp pain from her ankle caused her to lurch forward into the stone. Caressing the hilt of the Sword of Shannara, she gave a loud snort. "By Walker's missing arm, I've never been more insulted. Never, never, never-"
"Stop complaining girly!" interrupted a high-pitched voice. Stepping out of the brush, a chibi Walker glared at Grianne.
"HA!" Grianne sneered. "At least I'm not a-"
"STOP STOP STOP!!!!!!!!" cried the chibi Walker. "I AM GOING TO DISAPEAR SOON!!!!! REMEMBER WHAT I TOLD YOU AT HARDESHORN!" The chibi Walker's eyes suddenly turned all big and anime-ish. "Or else," he squeaked. "You will ne- never b-be-become a d-dr-druid." With a poof, he was gone.
"But you don't make any sense!!!!!!" she whined. Her body convulsed with sobs. "WHO IN THE FOUR LANDS IS TASSLEHOFF BURRFOOT!!!!?????"
The wind carried Walker's last words. "Not in the Four Lands," he replied. "In Krynn."
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
A dark shadow appeared over Solace. At first glance, one might have thought that it was the shadow of a dragon-as the destroyers of Solace were. But, it was merely a precision of black robed figures marching down the path that five companions had long ago traveled. "CHEMOSH CHEMOSH!!!" the precision cried.
"STOP NOW!!! I WANT ORDER!!!!" cried a small figure. Stumbling over a tree stump, the figure propped himself on top of a boulder where an old dwarf once sat before the end of his long journey.
Halting so suddenly, the black robed figures crashed into one and other. One stout figure, (a gully dwarf by smell) scurried onto the boulder. "ME WANT RATS NOW!!!" the gully dwarf cried shaking the small figure perched on the boulder.
Shaking of the gully dwarf, the kinder snatched the pouch filled with very dead rats from the gully dwarf's hand. Shoving the helpless gully dwarf off his perch, the small figure continued. "BUPU!" he cried. "You shall have your rats after we bring the worship of Chemosh throughout Krynn. That is," he said thoughtfully. "After we rule Solace. Shaking, his head, the figure resumed his speech. "ON TO THE INN OF LAST HOMES! I AM TASSLEHOFF BURRFOOT, HIGH CLERIC OF CHEMOSH!!!"
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
At this time, Caramon Majere, Hero of the Lance, was giving his youngest son, Palin, a lecture of why his son should not ever drink Dwarf Spirits. "They're like men and my half sister Kitiara." He lectured. "Once you have a tiny amount, the more you need." Waiting to see the impact of his speech on Palin, which was a lot of lip curling, Caramon continued. "If Kitiara finishes with one man, like poor Tanis," he adds solemnly. "She picks up a new one, like Dalamar!" he exclaimed brightly.
By now, Palin was extremely intrigued. "Father," Palin asked tersely. "Didn't aunt Kitiara, well, almost kill lord Dalamar?" Palin was very concerned about the Conclave's Head.
"Well," Caramon, now rather taken aback. "The Death Knight, Lord Soth, did trick Kit into almost murdering him. And," Caramon said wistfully. "He did really love Kit. Which just goes to show, my boy! He was enamored of her from her, uh well, pleasure--"
"CARAMON MAJERE!!!!" Tika gasped. Skillet in hand, she bashed Caramon over the head. "HOW DARE YOU DIRTY OUR SON'S MIND? I'LL-"
"Father," Palin interjected. Meandering his way to his father in attempt to dodge Tika's skillet. "What is this?" he drew out an object from his robes.
Recognizing the object as the fabled Device of Time Traveling, Caramon snatched the device from his son's hands. "N-n-no-nothing," he stammered. 'It's j-just, uh, Dalamar's gift for, uh, saving his life from, uh-"
Wide-eyed, Palin gasped. "THIS BELONGS TO DALAMAR THE DARK??!!!"
"Well, uh-"
"NO, IT DOES NOT!" cried a shrill voice. "It belonged to Gnimish the gnome."
"Tika!" Caramon shuddered. "It sounds like dear old Tas. How did-"
Unfortunately, he did not finish his sentence. Just then, the door was bashed open by a legion of black robed figures. "Hi Caramon," said the leading figure. "Are you ready to embrace Chemosh as your god?"
"WHAT IN THE ABBYSS??!!!" Caramon gasped. "TASSLEHOFF!!?"
"The same," Tas said brushing dirt from his velvety black robes. Drawing off a rather nice looking hood, Tas outstretched a small, lithe hand.
Lurching forward, Caramon caught hold of one of Tas's pouches. Shoving it into the sunlight, Caramon fainted. Sniffing, Tika bent over Caramon's lug of a body. Adorned on it was the symbol of Chemosh. "You stole it?" Tika asked.
Slapping away Tika's hand, Tas gave out a sardonic laugh. "No Tika," he sneered. "I am a Cleric of Chemosh, now."
"UNCLE TAS!" cried Palin. "YOU'RE SO COOL!!!!!"
"Are you ready to embrace Chemosh with heart and soul?" Tas asked, now solemn.
"YES, YES!!!" Palin cried.
The kender grinned evilly. "Then so be it." Palin's raiment deepened to a shade of black. At this sight, Tika fainted.
"Now my young apprentice," Tas cooed. "We must leave." Passing Caramon's body, Tas pocketed the Device of Time Traveling, which was locked in the man's unconscious hand. "MMWWWAAAAHHAAHAA!!!" Tas cried triumphantly. He broke out into an impromptu dance. "MY SOURCE OF POWER! NO LONGER WIOLL HAVE TO WALK!" Tas began to chant and twist the device. He then, began to glow and blur. His frame spun around and around. "ON TO PALANTHAS!" he cried.
A shaft of light appeared from Meridion. "NO YOU DON'T!" cried a befuddled old mage. Chanting his incantation, the mage wiggled a finger at kemder. POOF! THe kinder was gone. "I am so good," the mage chanted.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * Grianne Ohmsford was interrupted from her ramblings by a small, black robed figure dropping out of the sky in front of her. The figure sprang to his feet. "This isn't Palanthas," he muttered under his breath. He could no longer fell Chemosh's aura of power. "This isn't even Krynn! That FB!!!" he cried, remembering the mages fierce chanting. Looking up, he suddenly noticed that he had company. "Where is this!" he demanded, lurching forward. Catching hold of her very nice sword, Tas grinned evily.
"The Four Lands and-hey! That's mine!" Grianne jumped to her feet. Too late, the kender had withdrawn the sword from its sheath. Reaching his lithe hand, Tas grasped the pommel. Then, he saw the truth.
====== ====== ===== ====== ===== ====== ====== ======= ======
HA! Now, that's the way to redeem Tas. I am so good.
-Galaphile
The Four Lands were in peace. The Elven Kingdom had sent two-dozen of their own to study as druids at Paranor. Bek Ohmsford and Rue Meridion were being engaged and Panax, the first dwarf to not get K.O.ed in Shannara, was learning how to get that magnificent bronze tan that the inhabitants of Pakaris had acquired. As all these events transpired, one was the most important-Grianne's journey back from the Valley of Shale.
The former Isle Witch shuffled her large feet on the stone path. Moonlight led her path. Tripping over a rather large stone lying in the middle of the road, Grianne was sprawled on all fours.
A sharp pain from her ankle caused her to lurch forward into the stone. Caressing the hilt of the Sword of Shannara, she gave a loud snort. "By Walker's missing arm, I've never been more insulted. Never, never, never-"
"Stop complaining girly!" interrupted a high-pitched voice. Stepping out of the brush, a chibi Walker glared at Grianne.
"HA!" Grianne sneered. "At least I'm not a-"
"STOP STOP STOP!!!!!!!!" cried the chibi Walker. "I AM GOING TO DISAPEAR SOON!!!!! REMEMBER WHAT I TOLD YOU AT HARDESHORN!" The chibi Walker's eyes suddenly turned all big and anime-ish. "Or else," he squeaked. "You will ne- never b-be-become a d-dr-druid." With a poof, he was gone.
"But you don't make any sense!!!!!!" she whined. Her body convulsed with sobs. "WHO IN THE FOUR LANDS IS TASSLEHOFF BURRFOOT!!!!?????"
The wind carried Walker's last words. "Not in the Four Lands," he replied. "In Krynn."
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
A dark shadow appeared over Solace. At first glance, one might have thought that it was the shadow of a dragon-as the destroyers of Solace were. But, it was merely a precision of black robed figures marching down the path that five companions had long ago traveled. "CHEMOSH CHEMOSH!!!" the precision cried.
"STOP NOW!!! I WANT ORDER!!!!" cried a small figure. Stumbling over a tree stump, the figure propped himself on top of a boulder where an old dwarf once sat before the end of his long journey.
Halting so suddenly, the black robed figures crashed into one and other. One stout figure, (a gully dwarf by smell) scurried onto the boulder. "ME WANT RATS NOW!!!" the gully dwarf cried shaking the small figure perched on the boulder.
Shaking of the gully dwarf, the kinder snatched the pouch filled with very dead rats from the gully dwarf's hand. Shoving the helpless gully dwarf off his perch, the small figure continued. "BUPU!" he cried. "You shall have your rats after we bring the worship of Chemosh throughout Krynn. That is," he said thoughtfully. "After we rule Solace. Shaking, his head, the figure resumed his speech. "ON TO THE INN OF LAST HOMES! I AM TASSLEHOFF BURRFOOT, HIGH CLERIC OF CHEMOSH!!!"
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
At this time, Caramon Majere, Hero of the Lance, was giving his youngest son, Palin, a lecture of why his son should not ever drink Dwarf Spirits. "They're like men and my half sister Kitiara." He lectured. "Once you have a tiny amount, the more you need." Waiting to see the impact of his speech on Palin, which was a lot of lip curling, Caramon continued. "If Kitiara finishes with one man, like poor Tanis," he adds solemnly. "She picks up a new one, like Dalamar!" he exclaimed brightly.
By now, Palin was extremely intrigued. "Father," Palin asked tersely. "Didn't aunt Kitiara, well, almost kill lord Dalamar?" Palin was very concerned about the Conclave's Head.
"Well," Caramon, now rather taken aback. "The Death Knight, Lord Soth, did trick Kit into almost murdering him. And," Caramon said wistfully. "He did really love Kit. Which just goes to show, my boy! He was enamored of her from her, uh well, pleasure--"
"CARAMON MAJERE!!!!" Tika gasped. Skillet in hand, she bashed Caramon over the head. "HOW DARE YOU DIRTY OUR SON'S MIND? I'LL-"
"Father," Palin interjected. Meandering his way to his father in attempt to dodge Tika's skillet. "What is this?" he drew out an object from his robes.
Recognizing the object as the fabled Device of Time Traveling, Caramon snatched the device from his son's hands. "N-n-no-nothing," he stammered. 'It's j-just, uh, Dalamar's gift for, uh, saving his life from, uh-"
Wide-eyed, Palin gasped. "THIS BELONGS TO DALAMAR THE DARK??!!!"
"Well, uh-"
"NO, IT DOES NOT!" cried a shrill voice. "It belonged to Gnimish the gnome."
"Tika!" Caramon shuddered. "It sounds like dear old Tas. How did-"
Unfortunately, he did not finish his sentence. Just then, the door was bashed open by a legion of black robed figures. "Hi Caramon," said the leading figure. "Are you ready to embrace Chemosh as your god?"
"WHAT IN THE ABBYSS??!!!" Caramon gasped. "TASSLEHOFF!!?"
"The same," Tas said brushing dirt from his velvety black robes. Drawing off a rather nice looking hood, Tas outstretched a small, lithe hand.
Lurching forward, Caramon caught hold of one of Tas's pouches. Shoving it into the sunlight, Caramon fainted. Sniffing, Tika bent over Caramon's lug of a body. Adorned on it was the symbol of Chemosh. "You stole it?" Tika asked.
Slapping away Tika's hand, Tas gave out a sardonic laugh. "No Tika," he sneered. "I am a Cleric of Chemosh, now."
"UNCLE TAS!" cried Palin. "YOU'RE SO COOL!!!!!"
"Are you ready to embrace Chemosh with heart and soul?" Tas asked, now solemn.
"YES, YES!!!" Palin cried.
The kender grinned evilly. "Then so be it." Palin's raiment deepened to a shade of black. At this sight, Tika fainted.
"Now my young apprentice," Tas cooed. "We must leave." Passing Caramon's body, Tas pocketed the Device of Time Traveling, which was locked in the man's unconscious hand. "MMWWWAAAAHHAAHAA!!!" Tas cried triumphantly. He broke out into an impromptu dance. "MY SOURCE OF POWER! NO LONGER WIOLL HAVE TO WALK!" Tas began to chant and twist the device. He then, began to glow and blur. His frame spun around and around. "ON TO PALANTHAS!" he cried.
A shaft of light appeared from Meridion. "NO YOU DON'T!" cried a befuddled old mage. Chanting his incantation, the mage wiggled a finger at kemder. POOF! THe kinder was gone. "I am so good," the mage chanted.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * Grianne Ohmsford was interrupted from her ramblings by a small, black robed figure dropping out of the sky in front of her. The figure sprang to his feet. "This isn't Palanthas," he muttered under his breath. He could no longer fell Chemosh's aura of power. "This isn't even Krynn! That FB!!!" he cried, remembering the mages fierce chanting. Looking up, he suddenly noticed that he had company. "Where is this!" he demanded, lurching forward. Catching hold of her very nice sword, Tas grinned evily.
"The Four Lands and-hey! That's mine!" Grianne jumped to her feet. Too late, the kender had withdrawn the sword from its sheath. Reaching his lithe hand, Tas grasped the pommel. Then, he saw the truth.
====== ====== ===== ====== ===== ====== ====== ======= ======
HA! Now, that's the way to redeem Tas. I am so good.
-Galaphile