Sleepwake (Part 4/?)
See Part 1 for disclaimer.
Xiaoyu jumped in surprise when she heard Jin stir behind her, twisting restlessly on the mattress with his eyes still closed. She dropped to her knees beside his bed and took hold of his shoulders, pausing before shaking him with little force. He looked so tired, his skin a ghostly gray yellow hue, but she didn't know if it was safe to let him sleep. Not now, not here.
Think hard, a little voice said, is it really safe anywhere?
Xiaoyu ignored the voice and focused on rousing Jin. He was putting up a fight, but that meant he was no longer catatonic, merely having a nightmare.
"Jin, wake up, Jin," she said, relieved when he stopped struggling against her and opened his eyes. God, he looked so tired.
"Xiaoyu?" he said, trying to sit up. Xiaoyu gently pushed him back down.
"Just lie down for a moment, okay? You're too weak to be doing anything else."
Jin obediently complied, and settled for watching Xiaoyu's face as she brushed his hair out of his eyes, straightened his jacket. Finally, she stopped fussing and took a deep breath.
"Who's chasing you?" she said at last, breaking the silence.
"Wha'? How, how d'you know?"
"It's not hard to guess. You've been missing for two weeks, Jin, did you know that? Ever since the end of the Tekken tournament, it's been like you never existed. I call your room, send mail, ask around. . .nothing. Then suddenly, you pop back onto the face of the earth again, when I'm being mugged on the street one night, of all things! And, and look at you! You look like you've died!" Xiaoyu waved her arms in the air, trying to express all the emotions she had bottled inside for the past weeks.
"Worse." Jin's lips twisted into a parody of a smile.
"Tell me."
He stared at her, his eyes feverishly bright. Please don't hold back on me, Jin, she willed. Please let me help.
Then he looked away, and Xiaoyu felt crestfallen. But Jin spoke:
"Heihachi," he mumbled.
"Your grandfather?" asked Xiaoyu, her voice incredulous. "Why would he- no, wait." She got to her feet and began to dig in the splintered remains of Jin's desk. She returned to his side bearing gifts: a bottle of water and half a dozen candy bars. Xiaoyu smiled as Jin's eyes lit up. She helped him sit up against a few pillows, then sat back as he began enthusiastically stuffing his mouth full of chocolate, occasionally making blissful sounds that went along the lines of "caramel!" and "heaven", much to Xiaoyu's amusement. Jin Kazama didn't look like it, but he had a worse sweet tooth than Xiaoyu herself, which was saying something. When he finally finished with a sigh of utter satisfaction, Xiaoyu unthinkingly commented, "It's like you haven't eaten for days, huh?" Her hand leapt to her mouth when he didn't reply.
"Oh, Jin, I'm sorry-"
"No, it's okay. And actually, I had some toast. . .uh, yesterday."
"How- What-"
"Don't look so scared Xiaoyu, it's not as bad as you think. Heihachi shot me, and then I've been hiding and- okay, so it is as bad as you think. But. . ." Jin looked ahead, in his mind seeing something more than just the wall of his room.
"He never had a chance against me, you know," Jin said quietly. Xiaoyu had the feeling that he was thinking aloud as much as he was trying to explain for her.
"Maybe if he'd been younger. But then again, probably not. There's, there's something inside me that's not a part of _me_. It's _stronger_, and maybe immortal, and its hatred is so-" Jin broke off, covering his head in his arms, bunching his fingers in unwashed hair, and not noticing the pain it must have cause him.
"Damn him! He should have known, he should've- What was he trying to _accomplish_?" Agony made his voice sharp and jagged, like a rocky cliff, one that Xiaoyu had the sensation of plummeting off of. In all the time she'd known him, she had never heard this kind of anguish in Jin's words, infused in his manner. A dark cloud saturated the air around Jin, one that made Xiaoyu want to weep for him while simultaneously repelling her with fear and doubt. When he spoke again, his speech was strained but soft.
"Heihachi was my only family. I wanted to love him. But I'm not blind, I saw the resentment in his eyes whenever he looked at me, just barely hidden behind his formalities. I just didn't want to believe it, didn't want to think that he was plotting all this while, planning betrayal." Jin paused for breath.
"If it's too hard, or too tiring, Jin, you don't have to go on," Xiaoyu said, looking down. The little voice spoke up again: or is it you who doesn't want him to go on?
"I have to let it out." She could feel his steady gaze on her. Xiaoyu's hands found the candy wrappers and latched on, twisting.
"I fought Heihachi in single combat and it was. . . so strange. He's a powerful, cunning fighter, but that day, it was like he just didn't care. No, let me rephrase that: not like he didn't care, it was like it didn't matter. I defeated him, fair and square, but it felt as if he wasn't even _trying_, just going through the motions, and yet, watching me so closely all the while."
Xiaoyu readily envisioned the scene in her mind, thinking of the few times she had talked with Heihachi herself. He had always seemed unnaturally alert, like he was waiting for something that nobody else could anticipate.
Xiaoyu watched Jin's face, rapt with uneasy fascination in his tale despite herself. She sat perfectly still, only moving her hands in subconscious patterns, twisting the plastic wrapper.
"And then, something- incredible happened. There was a giant green _monster_ with red eyes in front of me. It looked like something out of every child's nightmare, but it was real. Its attacks were real, anyway," Jin said, absently rubbing his side, where an invisible bruise had healed long ago.
"I remembered it, a part of me. Its name was the Toshin, it- it had killed my mother- but for some reason, seeing it there. . . I thought I was hallucinating, wasn't ready when it attacked me. The Toshin had the upper hand at first, and did most of its damage at the beginning. . . the pure _power_ it had, god like. But. . . It was just barely sentient, and it didn't plan or understand strategy. I could trick it once I understood what was going on: all it did was charge without any foresight. It was a simple thing then to step into its blind spot, defeat it with speed and evasion. Your forte actually," Jin said, suddenly focusing on a startled Xiaoyu before gazing back at the wall, almost in a trance. She shook her head, incredulous, and yet hearing the unmistakable truth in Jin's voice. But how could it be possible? She lived in a world roamed by monsters?
"In mid-battle, the Toshin transformed into something even more hideous, like a hunchbacked dragon. But it was the same thing: more power, no strategy. I finally defeated it too, and it just disappeared in this- this flash of _darkness_, like being plunged into melted tar. I thought it was over then. I was so tired, so worn down. So wrong."
"After the battle," Jin continued in a dull flat tone, "Heihachi pulled a silver handgun out of nowhere and shot me, once in the chest." Xiaoyu bit back a gasp. She wanted to comfort Jin, but she remained silent and let him speak.
"He has perfect aim: I felt the bullet tear through me, lodge right in my heart. The physical pain was almost nothing next to the look of hatred he sent me. I didn't understand, for a split second, I just stared at him, unbelieving. Then I knew: I had only been a tool to tame the monster, but it couldn't be tamed without being destroyed, so he had no more use for me. I was nothing but a reminder of _Kazuya_," he spat out, his father's name bitter on his tongue.
"By all laws of nature, I should have died that night." Jin trailed off, seeming lost in thought.
"You're still here," Xiaoyu said quietly, taking his warm hand and turning it palm up, lightly tracing his life line. You haven't died yet Jin. Don't let your hope die before you do. Jin blinked, his eyes shining with emotion.
"Xiaoyu, do you believe in evil?"
"Evil? Like . . . the Toshin?"
"No, not that. The Toshin killed and devoured souls: I'll _never_ forgive it for taking my mother-" Jin's voice broke, a sharp sliver of _something_ surfacing in his expression and then disappearing just as quickly, "- but it was an animal in spirit and mind, without capacity for thought or feeling. I mean evil like- like the Devil."
Xiaoyu stared at him. She believed in _crime_. She believed in people who were bad and did bad things, but Ling Xiaoyu had never in her life encountered true evil, and had no understanding of what it was. She slowly shook her head "no".
"I didn't believe it either, long ago. I feel it though. It's in my blood and my genes. I- inherited it."
"Kazuya!" Xiaoyu whispered. She had heard rumors. Everybody had.
"Yes. He was possessed, and he passed it onto me. That's why I didn't die, Xiaoyu. The Devil saved me." Jin's mouth quirked into that humorless, frightening smile again.
"I don't know the details after that, because I blacked out. An entire week in my memory is a complete blank, and all I remember is the feeling of hatred. When I regained consciousness, I was in some city, far away from here, healed completely without even a scar. I woke up, so hungry, but afraid to show my face in daylight, knowing Heihachi's thugs would be searching for me. I hid for another week, sleeping in the day and taking pieces of food that I found lying around at night. And each time, I fell asleep in the alley of one place, and woke up somewhere else, not knowing how. Yesterday, I woke up here." Jin gestured to indicate the general location they were at, beyond the Mishima High dorms.
Xiaoyu absorbed this, not knowing what else to do or say. At last, she carefully ventured:
"How do you feel?"
"I-" Jin opened his mouth, then closed it. Then opened it again.
"I don't know. I feel less tired. A lot less tired. What's in these chocolate bars, anyway?" he said, reaching down and picking up the wrapper that Xiaoyu had nervously been twisting. He inspected the abused plastic for a moment, and then his mouth formed a genuine grin.
"You know, Xiaoyu, no matter how hard you try, you can't make a crane from candy wrappers."
Picking up on his lighter tone, Xiaoyu growled in mock-indigence and swatted the back of Jin's head.
"I know, you big dork, give me that!"
Jin turned on his side, his head propped up on one hand, gazing thoughtfully at Xiaoyu. His playful mood had changed into something she had more trouble identifying. Whatever it was, she had the sense that she wouldn't like it.
"Xiaoyu," Jin said, looking into her eyes, "I want to tell you that-"
"I'M GOING TO KILL YOU, YOU HAIRSPRAY-MARINATED WEASEL!!"
In a cloud of dust, the door to Jin's room broke off its hinges and slammed into the ground, narrowly missing Xiaoyu's head.
The dust soon settled, revealing fiery hair that matched an equally fiery gaze. Jin's eyes narrowed to slits.
"Hwoarang."
Authors notes:
Man, that was a long one. Exposition is exhausting! I'm too tired to edit properly, so I think I'll re-edit tomorrow. Meanwhile, please forgive stupid grammar mistakes, and/or other writing inconsistencies.
However, I do have some energy left in me to rave about two fics I came across while digging in that oh-so-endless mine of Tekken fiction here at fanfiction.net (write more, people!). The first is the fairly new "Canto", by Lilykane, an insanely talented writer. Those of you who are Tekken 2 die-hards _have_ to check this one out, as well as anyone who wants to bask in the glory of well-written descriptive prose.
The other is older: "The Queen of the Ironfist: Anne Robinson?!" by Dezzie Chan. This fic is so hilarious! Miss Chan's Hwoarang had me rolling on the floor laughing. It's one of the most clever humor fics I've read, and it's guaranteed to put a smile on your face. A big goofy one. Your friends will be confounded. Go read now.
(I didn't get the permission of either writers, so authors, I'd be happy to take this down if you want. Keep up the good work ^_^.)
Oh, and also, Happy Happy Happy Thanksgiving, people! Four day weekend: thankful? Am I ever!
Constructive criticism will be printed out and framed. Flames will be used to toast marshmallows. Yum.
See Part 1 for disclaimer.
Xiaoyu jumped in surprise when she heard Jin stir behind her, twisting restlessly on the mattress with his eyes still closed. She dropped to her knees beside his bed and took hold of his shoulders, pausing before shaking him with little force. He looked so tired, his skin a ghostly gray yellow hue, but she didn't know if it was safe to let him sleep. Not now, not here.
Think hard, a little voice said, is it really safe anywhere?
Xiaoyu ignored the voice and focused on rousing Jin. He was putting up a fight, but that meant he was no longer catatonic, merely having a nightmare.
"Jin, wake up, Jin," she said, relieved when he stopped struggling against her and opened his eyes. God, he looked so tired.
"Xiaoyu?" he said, trying to sit up. Xiaoyu gently pushed him back down.
"Just lie down for a moment, okay? You're too weak to be doing anything else."
Jin obediently complied, and settled for watching Xiaoyu's face as she brushed his hair out of his eyes, straightened his jacket. Finally, she stopped fussing and took a deep breath.
"Who's chasing you?" she said at last, breaking the silence.
"Wha'? How, how d'you know?"
"It's not hard to guess. You've been missing for two weeks, Jin, did you know that? Ever since the end of the Tekken tournament, it's been like you never existed. I call your room, send mail, ask around. . .nothing. Then suddenly, you pop back onto the face of the earth again, when I'm being mugged on the street one night, of all things! And, and look at you! You look like you've died!" Xiaoyu waved her arms in the air, trying to express all the emotions she had bottled inside for the past weeks.
"Worse." Jin's lips twisted into a parody of a smile.
"Tell me."
He stared at her, his eyes feverishly bright. Please don't hold back on me, Jin, she willed. Please let me help.
Then he looked away, and Xiaoyu felt crestfallen. But Jin spoke:
"Heihachi," he mumbled.
"Your grandfather?" asked Xiaoyu, her voice incredulous. "Why would he- no, wait." She got to her feet and began to dig in the splintered remains of Jin's desk. She returned to his side bearing gifts: a bottle of water and half a dozen candy bars. Xiaoyu smiled as Jin's eyes lit up. She helped him sit up against a few pillows, then sat back as he began enthusiastically stuffing his mouth full of chocolate, occasionally making blissful sounds that went along the lines of "caramel!" and "heaven", much to Xiaoyu's amusement. Jin Kazama didn't look like it, but he had a worse sweet tooth than Xiaoyu herself, which was saying something. When he finally finished with a sigh of utter satisfaction, Xiaoyu unthinkingly commented, "It's like you haven't eaten for days, huh?" Her hand leapt to her mouth when he didn't reply.
"Oh, Jin, I'm sorry-"
"No, it's okay. And actually, I had some toast. . .uh, yesterday."
"How- What-"
"Don't look so scared Xiaoyu, it's not as bad as you think. Heihachi shot me, and then I've been hiding and- okay, so it is as bad as you think. But. . ." Jin looked ahead, in his mind seeing something more than just the wall of his room.
"He never had a chance against me, you know," Jin said quietly. Xiaoyu had the feeling that he was thinking aloud as much as he was trying to explain for her.
"Maybe if he'd been younger. But then again, probably not. There's, there's something inside me that's not a part of _me_. It's _stronger_, and maybe immortal, and its hatred is so-" Jin broke off, covering his head in his arms, bunching his fingers in unwashed hair, and not noticing the pain it must have cause him.
"Damn him! He should have known, he should've- What was he trying to _accomplish_?" Agony made his voice sharp and jagged, like a rocky cliff, one that Xiaoyu had the sensation of plummeting off of. In all the time she'd known him, she had never heard this kind of anguish in Jin's words, infused in his manner. A dark cloud saturated the air around Jin, one that made Xiaoyu want to weep for him while simultaneously repelling her with fear and doubt. When he spoke again, his speech was strained but soft.
"Heihachi was my only family. I wanted to love him. But I'm not blind, I saw the resentment in his eyes whenever he looked at me, just barely hidden behind his formalities. I just didn't want to believe it, didn't want to think that he was plotting all this while, planning betrayal." Jin paused for breath.
"If it's too hard, or too tiring, Jin, you don't have to go on," Xiaoyu said, looking down. The little voice spoke up again: or is it you who doesn't want him to go on?
"I have to let it out." She could feel his steady gaze on her. Xiaoyu's hands found the candy wrappers and latched on, twisting.
"I fought Heihachi in single combat and it was. . . so strange. He's a powerful, cunning fighter, but that day, it was like he just didn't care. No, let me rephrase that: not like he didn't care, it was like it didn't matter. I defeated him, fair and square, but it felt as if he wasn't even _trying_, just going through the motions, and yet, watching me so closely all the while."
Xiaoyu readily envisioned the scene in her mind, thinking of the few times she had talked with Heihachi herself. He had always seemed unnaturally alert, like he was waiting for something that nobody else could anticipate.
Xiaoyu watched Jin's face, rapt with uneasy fascination in his tale despite herself. She sat perfectly still, only moving her hands in subconscious patterns, twisting the plastic wrapper.
"And then, something- incredible happened. There was a giant green _monster_ with red eyes in front of me. It looked like something out of every child's nightmare, but it was real. Its attacks were real, anyway," Jin said, absently rubbing his side, where an invisible bruise had healed long ago.
"I remembered it, a part of me. Its name was the Toshin, it- it had killed my mother- but for some reason, seeing it there. . . I thought I was hallucinating, wasn't ready when it attacked me. The Toshin had the upper hand at first, and did most of its damage at the beginning. . . the pure _power_ it had, god like. But. . . It was just barely sentient, and it didn't plan or understand strategy. I could trick it once I understood what was going on: all it did was charge without any foresight. It was a simple thing then to step into its blind spot, defeat it with speed and evasion. Your forte actually," Jin said, suddenly focusing on a startled Xiaoyu before gazing back at the wall, almost in a trance. She shook her head, incredulous, and yet hearing the unmistakable truth in Jin's voice. But how could it be possible? She lived in a world roamed by monsters?
"In mid-battle, the Toshin transformed into something even more hideous, like a hunchbacked dragon. But it was the same thing: more power, no strategy. I finally defeated it too, and it just disappeared in this- this flash of _darkness_, like being plunged into melted tar. I thought it was over then. I was so tired, so worn down. So wrong."
"After the battle," Jin continued in a dull flat tone, "Heihachi pulled a silver handgun out of nowhere and shot me, once in the chest." Xiaoyu bit back a gasp. She wanted to comfort Jin, but she remained silent and let him speak.
"He has perfect aim: I felt the bullet tear through me, lodge right in my heart. The physical pain was almost nothing next to the look of hatred he sent me. I didn't understand, for a split second, I just stared at him, unbelieving. Then I knew: I had only been a tool to tame the monster, but it couldn't be tamed without being destroyed, so he had no more use for me. I was nothing but a reminder of _Kazuya_," he spat out, his father's name bitter on his tongue.
"By all laws of nature, I should have died that night." Jin trailed off, seeming lost in thought.
"You're still here," Xiaoyu said quietly, taking his warm hand and turning it palm up, lightly tracing his life line. You haven't died yet Jin. Don't let your hope die before you do. Jin blinked, his eyes shining with emotion.
"Xiaoyu, do you believe in evil?"
"Evil? Like . . . the Toshin?"
"No, not that. The Toshin killed and devoured souls: I'll _never_ forgive it for taking my mother-" Jin's voice broke, a sharp sliver of _something_ surfacing in his expression and then disappearing just as quickly, "- but it was an animal in spirit and mind, without capacity for thought or feeling. I mean evil like- like the Devil."
Xiaoyu stared at him. She believed in _crime_. She believed in people who were bad and did bad things, but Ling Xiaoyu had never in her life encountered true evil, and had no understanding of what it was. She slowly shook her head "no".
"I didn't believe it either, long ago. I feel it though. It's in my blood and my genes. I- inherited it."
"Kazuya!" Xiaoyu whispered. She had heard rumors. Everybody had.
"Yes. He was possessed, and he passed it onto me. That's why I didn't die, Xiaoyu. The Devil saved me." Jin's mouth quirked into that humorless, frightening smile again.
"I don't know the details after that, because I blacked out. An entire week in my memory is a complete blank, and all I remember is the feeling of hatred. When I regained consciousness, I was in some city, far away from here, healed completely without even a scar. I woke up, so hungry, but afraid to show my face in daylight, knowing Heihachi's thugs would be searching for me. I hid for another week, sleeping in the day and taking pieces of food that I found lying around at night. And each time, I fell asleep in the alley of one place, and woke up somewhere else, not knowing how. Yesterday, I woke up here." Jin gestured to indicate the general location they were at, beyond the Mishima High dorms.
Xiaoyu absorbed this, not knowing what else to do or say. At last, she carefully ventured:
"How do you feel?"
"I-" Jin opened his mouth, then closed it. Then opened it again.
"I don't know. I feel less tired. A lot less tired. What's in these chocolate bars, anyway?" he said, reaching down and picking up the wrapper that Xiaoyu had nervously been twisting. He inspected the abused plastic for a moment, and then his mouth formed a genuine grin.
"You know, Xiaoyu, no matter how hard you try, you can't make a crane from candy wrappers."
Picking up on his lighter tone, Xiaoyu growled in mock-indigence and swatted the back of Jin's head.
"I know, you big dork, give me that!"
Jin turned on his side, his head propped up on one hand, gazing thoughtfully at Xiaoyu. His playful mood had changed into something she had more trouble identifying. Whatever it was, she had the sense that she wouldn't like it.
"Xiaoyu," Jin said, looking into her eyes, "I want to tell you that-"
"I'M GOING TO KILL YOU, YOU HAIRSPRAY-MARINATED WEASEL!!"
In a cloud of dust, the door to Jin's room broke off its hinges and slammed into the ground, narrowly missing Xiaoyu's head.
The dust soon settled, revealing fiery hair that matched an equally fiery gaze. Jin's eyes narrowed to slits.
"Hwoarang."
Authors notes:
Man, that was a long one. Exposition is exhausting! I'm too tired to edit properly, so I think I'll re-edit tomorrow. Meanwhile, please forgive stupid grammar mistakes, and/or other writing inconsistencies.
However, I do have some energy left in me to rave about two fics I came across while digging in that oh-so-endless mine of Tekken fiction here at fanfiction.net (write more, people!). The first is the fairly new "Canto", by Lilykane, an insanely talented writer. Those of you who are Tekken 2 die-hards _have_ to check this one out, as well as anyone who wants to bask in the glory of well-written descriptive prose.
The other is older: "The Queen of the Ironfist: Anne Robinson?!" by Dezzie Chan. This fic is so hilarious! Miss Chan's Hwoarang had me rolling on the floor laughing. It's one of the most clever humor fics I've read, and it's guaranteed to put a smile on your face. A big goofy one. Your friends will be confounded. Go read now.
(I didn't get the permission of either writers, so authors, I'd be happy to take this down if you want. Keep up the good work ^_^.)
Oh, and also, Happy Happy Happy Thanksgiving, people! Four day weekend: thankful? Am I ever!
Constructive criticism will be printed out and framed. Flames will be used to toast marshmallows. Yum.