"Three, please," Sarah told the hostess at the Valley Inn politely.
"Right this way, ma'am," the hostess instructed, leading Sarah to an unoccupied table. "Your server will be with you in just a moment, but until then is there anything I can get you?"
"Actually," Sarah began, "There are two people in my party who haven't arrived yet. If you see them, can you point them in my direction? There's a teenage girl with a boy."
"Certainly," the hostess obliged. "Enjoy your meal."
"Thank you," Sarah replied as she picked up a menu and opened it. The neatly printed words of the menu didn't focus quite right in Sarah's eyes though, she was distracted by the events of that afternoon. After all Dixie had been through, her first big move in Pine Valley had been a bust. Sarah felt terrible leaving Dixie by herself at the hotel room, despite Dixie's reassurances that she would be fine. Sarah knew she was not the one Dixie needed right now anyway. She needed her son.
"Aunt Sarah?" The excited sounds of a girl's voice interrupted Sarah's thoughts. She looked up and saw the slim, blondish-red haired figure of her niece.
"Amy!" Sarah jumped up and hugged the girl tightly. "Oh, sweetheart, it's wonderful to see you. It's been so long."
"Too long," Amy agreed, hugging her aunt again.
"And where's the young man?" Sarah asked as they broke their embrace. A tall boy with dark hair and eyes stepped out from behind Amy, bashfully smiling. Sarah blinked profusely as Amy proceeded to introduce him.
"Aunt Sarah, I'd like you to meet--"
"JR," Sarah cut in. She peered at him skeptically.
"Um, yes," said Amy with surprise. "And JR, this is Sarah Sprites, my aunt."
JR nervously stuck his hand out for Sarah to shake. She gripped it limply. "I know you," she told him. "Oh, we've never met before. But I've heard all about you."
Amy and JR both looked confused. Amy had hardly mentioned JR before this afternoon, but she recovered from her stupor quickly and asked, "How do you know JR?"
"Because I know his sister," Sarah professed, choosing her words carefully. "Jenny-Kate."
"Aunt Sarah, JR doesn't have a sister named Jenny-Kate. He does have a sister named Colby, but--"
"JR," Sarah interrupted, challenging him, "is that true?"
Gaping at her, he gestured awkwardly with his hands, finally running them through his hair and spitting out in a hushed voice, "How do you know about Jenny-Kate?"
"I met your mother on the way back from France. She's a dear woman. We've become good friends."
"I live in the smallest town in the world," JR said, both disgusted and aghast. Amy searched the faces of both her boyfriend and Aunt for some clue that could put her back in the loop. No such clue, however, was found.
"I didn't know your mother was back, JR," she tried to cue him for some sort of explanation.
"You know if we had had lunch before we'd gone to the park we wouldn't even be having this conversation."
"Okay," Amy gave up. "Would someone mind telling me what's going on?"
"I'm sorry," Sarah apologized, "Let's sit down, and if JR doesn't mind, I'll get you up to speed, and maybe we can work out a nice conclusion for this fiasco together."
Roughly, that is what happened during the course of the meal; Sarah talked, Amy listened, and JR picked at his food quietly. When Sarah had finally recounted the whole sordid tale, Amy squirmed edgily in her seat. She felt hurt that JR hadn't told her the story himself, yet could see why he would avoid the topic. From the stories he'd told, she could tell how much his mother had meant to him. Her unexpected return was obviously affecting him.
"JR," Amy meagerly spoke, "I think you should try to find your mother."
"I have no desire to," he said flatly. "Especially not now."
"I know how much you care about her, how much you missed her while she was away. Maybe-"
"Look, I don't want to see her, ok?" JR snapped in exasperation. "Nine months ago she left me, nevermind how I felt about the situation. So what if I needed her? She was in Paris. I had to deal with that. Now she comes back acting like this little baby escapade was something anyone would have done. Maybe, maybe she did the right thing, but what about me? Or Tad, what about our family?" JR was blazing now. "It was at our expense. You know, I'd listen to my friends complain about their mothers. 'Sorry I'm late, my mom made me change my shirt,' or 'I can't talk right now, my mom wants me to clean my room.' And I'd almost envy them! Oh, but I can just put that behind me, right? Uh-uh. I don't think so. I lost nine months with my mother, and I lost them because that's the way she wanted it." JR practically gasped for breath, the eyes of Amy and Sarah watching him attentively.
"Well," Sarah said with contrasting calmness, "I'd like to point out that as soon as it was safe for her and Jenny to travel she was on a plane to Pine Valley. Once she got here, she raced to find you, trying to be with you again as soon as she could; and when she did, it was your decision to extend your estrangement indefinitely."
"You're just losing more time with her," Amy echoed, taking JR's hand. He caressed it gently in thought. Maybe he was wasting time. Maybe he had to meet his mother half-way-- whatever was holding him back wasn't doing him any good. Maybe it was time for him to find his mother and make sure she... and his sister... would come home for good.
"Do you know where she is?" JR asked hesitantly.
"Of course," Sarah nodded eagerly. "And if you kids don't mind going for a little ride, I can have you there in twenty minutes." JR looked towards Amy, who gave him the same eager nod as her Aunt.
"We'd better get a move on, then," JR smiled diffidently. "We don't have any time to waste."
Dixie turned off the television numbly, and rolled onto her side. The room was quiet enough that had a pin dropped, the sound it would have made would be comparable to an explosion. Dixie squeezed her eyelids shut, hiding her swollen eyes, which were still red even though she'd stopped crying at least an hour before. Against her eyelids, colorful stars twinkled and blinked. Irritated, Dixie opened her eyes and sighed, grumbling, "I can't even close my eyes in peace."
In the corner of the room, Jenny-Kate napped in crib, oblivious to the day's painful events, and the future days that Dixie was dreading more and more. Dixie watched her in amazement; her tiny fingers holding a blanket against her plump cheeks. Her world consisted of a dry diaper, a full tummy, and at the moment, a comfortable nap. She had a mommy who loved her, and she was vaguely aware that they were at some new place. That didn't concern her a bit, though. For her, everything was perfect.
*She's so beautiful,* Dixie thought. *Her life is so fragile...* she feared that her baby, so content now, would grow up without her Daddy, or her brother, for that matter. She would begin to resent Dixie for the decisions she made, the opportunities she let slip between her fingers. Yet all she could do was try to make everything right-- there were no guarantees. What if...
Her eyes flooded, and she walked quickly to the bathroom, wiping her eyes and nose with a tissue. She filled a cup with water, and drank it slowly, trying to soothe her mind. As she set the cup down, a knocking came from the door, followed by Sarah's muffled voice.
"Dixie? It's me. Could I come in?"
Dixie rushed to answer the door. "Hi," she said emptily. "How was lunch?"
"Lunch was great. I'm actually going to head to my room with my niece, but I wanted to let you know I'm dropping off a guest here for you."
"What?" Dixie began to back away a little defensively, surprised at Sarah's actions. Ambling in from the hall came JR, looking somewhat shy and reproachful.
"How did--" Dixie lost her words, astonished.
JR shook his head and grinned. "Man, Mom, you've got the connections."
"I'll be across the hall," Sarah said, hurrying out the door and closing it quietly behind her.
Dixie stared speechlessly at JR for a few moments until he broke the silence.
"Look, Mom... I want to say that I'm sorry for the way I acted in the park today. That wasn't cool at all. I guess I was like, so upset that I just lost it."
"Oh, honey," Dixie finally found her words, and did her best to console her son. She wrapped her arms around him fiercely, wishing she could hold him in her arms again, and be sure that he knew how much she loved him. "You have every reason to be upset. I'm so sorry I left you, that I lied to you. I thought I was protecting everybody, doing the right thing, and I cannot apologize enough to make up for whatever pain I've caused you."
"I missed you so much..." JR broke off, his voice quivering.
"I missed you too, every day, with all my heart. I know phone calls and postcards are no comparison to a mother. I'm sorry I haven't been able to be here for you these past months as much as I should have. The only thing I can ask is that you'll let me into your life again today. I want to be a family again."
"I do, too." JR affirmed strongly, pulling out of their embrace to look her in the eyes. "You, me, Jamie, Jenny-Kate, and Tad."
"And Tad..." Dixie repeated reluctantly.
"He still loves you," JR reassured her.
"I hope that's enough. My God, I told him I wanted a divorce. I left with the child he didn't know he had for nine months. That's not the easiest thing to sweep under the rug, you know?"
"Tad would never turn his back on you, everyone knows that. And there's no way in the world he would abandon his daughter."
Dixie thought she had no more tears left, but sure enough, they came. "Your faith means so much." She began to sob, "I love you."
"Shhh, Shh, it's okay, Mom," JR held her. "I love you too."
A cry came from Jenny's crib. Apparently she did not intend to be left out of this cherished moment. Brother and mother hurried to the edge of the crib.
"Is she awake?" JR asked anxiously.
"Yeah," Dixie replied softly, lifting Jenny from her crib. She babbled nonsense in Dixie's arms."
JR cleared his throat. "Can I hold her?"
Smiling, Dixie answered, "Of course." Gently, she transferred the baby to JR's arms. He took her, cradling her with fragile care.
"Hey, baby," he cooed. "I'm your big brother. Yes, I am. We're going to have lots of fun together. I'm going to take you to get your nose pierced. Haha, just kidding. We won't do that. But I can teach you how to play with a ball, and all sorts of exciting things like that. Maybe we should work on walking first, though. You'd like that, wouldn't you? Wouldn't you?" He leaned his head towards hers, close enough to smell her milky, sweet baby smell. Close enough, also, for Jenny's hand to reach out like a bullet towards JR's hair. He jerked his head back quickly. "Not so fast there, Jenny. I have another sister too, so I'm onto your tricks. Don't touch the hair." She yawned in response. JR laughed.
Dixie admired JR's brotherly ways: playful, yet watchful, and so loving. Jenny-Kate looked so at home in her brother's arms, watching him adoringly-- *she could have him wrapped around her finger so fast,* Dixie thought. She watched happily at the part of her family that was beginning to grow together, and imagined dreamily what the future could hold.
It was late when Sarah knocked on Dixie's door again. She could hear happy laughter coming from inside the room. Dixie opened the door with a smile and a warm greeting, confirming Sarah's belief that the night had gone well.
"It's getting late. I was just thinking I should get these kids home," she winked.
"I suppose it is getting late," Dixie agreed. JR got up from where he had been laying on the bed with a drowsy Jenny, and put her back in her crib, to which she did not protest.
"Goodnight," he kissed his mother on the cheek. Dixie ruffled his hair affectionately. "Hey!" he scolded her playfully. "Remember-- when you go out with Tad, tell me. I want to know, and I can baby-sit for Jenny while you guys are out, too."
"I'll call you soon," Dixie promised. "Goodnight." JR walked to the doorway, taking Amy's hand, and meandering down the hall to give Dixie a few minutes alone with Sarah.
"So I take it things went alright tonight between you two?"
Dixie smiled gratefully. "Very much so. I can't believe your niece is going out with JR. Thank you so much for bringing him here tonight. You have no idea how much this means to me."
"I know what it's like to think you've lost your child. My son and I went through a rough patch, but we made it in the end. I knew you and JR could make it through the same thing. I'm so glad I found him, and even more glad that you're together again."
"I'm so sick of crying," Dixie moaned as her eyes welled up again, "but at least they're good tears this time." Sarah squeezed Dixie's hand and smiled.
"I had better go get them home," she sighed finally. "We can talk more in the morning, okay?"
"Definitely. Goodnight, Sarah. And thank you again."