Just An Illusion Of Passion

Blue Dreamer

~*~ Chapter Five: How naïve I could have been to believe ~*~

May 22nd 1999:

Tonight the annual prom ball. I'm not really exited about it for some reason... Maybe it's due to the fact that I don't have a dancing partner. Marron made me promise to come, no matter what...

Damm Marron and her persuasion capacities...Goten will be coming to pick me up and Marron at her place. It feels a little weird and I'm like the odd one out in this equation of love.

I'm jealous for sure as my best friend and uncle are in love and I have no one to take care of me... Am I so ugly or what?

I'm sure the ball is going to be a disaster... anyways, must go to Marron's now, she wants to dress me up. I know it feels odd.

Am I some kind of a doll to her?

It amuses her and I guess it amuses me as well... Marron, sweet Marron, without you I'm sure I would have gone crazy in this town...

Anyways, you'll get to know about this night tomorrow or so... I'm sure I'll be alone as usual but what can I expect?

*~*~*

July 21th 2001:

I finally did get a message from Trunks after having written such a strong mail last time...I told him that I felt cheated and deceived as he spoke of love but apparently it was just an affair for him:

"Dear Trunks,

I'm writing this mail because I'm terribly upset over you?

Why haven't you written to me?

I'm so confused as you told me you would keep in touch with me and up to date no calls, no emails, nothing . Where you playing with my feelings?

I feel that all you wanted was to play with me and my emotions not caring about the consequences.

You could have been honest after all I could have accepted that if you just wanted a one night adventure as I enjoyed it as well.

All I wanted is honesty.

I don't know if you'll take a little time to respond or not.

Anyways, bye for now.

Pan"

When I got his email, I was overjoyed at first...After all he wrote to me on my birthday... Indeed I'm 21 today. My hopes were deceived as usual. This is what he wrote to me

"Dear Panny,

please don't get so hushed up.

We live world apart so it is impossible for us to have a relationship.

I don't understand why you feel this way.

I'd like you to explain.

Best Regards.

Trunks"

I cried... Yes I cried as I never felt this way before. Of course I had other rejections in my life but here, this was terrible. How could someone just play with other peoples' feelings? I'm so confused so disturbed...

I did not tell anything to Marron as yet. She has her own problems to deal with. I should not be crying over myself...

My best friend is in a worse situation than me. She's just killed her own baby... That's what I call it.

I'm against abortions but she's my friend and I have to support her no matter what she does, right? What are friends for otherwise?

Later in the afternoon, Marron called me and asked me to come to her place. I thought she needed to talk some more so, without second thoughts I went.

As I got there, I found out she had organised a surprise birthday party for me.

There again I cried... the second time today. While others thought that I was crying because I has happy, Marron realised something was wrong.

She took me apart, and I just told her the whole story and the ending with Trunks email. Marron did not tell me anything but just let me cry on her shoulder...

Thanks you Marron for everything, you're a wonderful friend !

I realise that by the end of this week I have to go back to university... and that reminds me I have to finish that essay!!! I better stop writing now and try and concentrate on my homework.


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"Dreams are the beginning of a never ending story"
Come visit my website: http://www.landofdreams.fr.st
Email me at: bluedreamer80@hotmail.com