Shinji's Decision
Part
2 - version: 1 completed 12/12/99
version 2 completed 15/12/99
version 3 completed 22/4/2001
By Jeff
Mullier
Email:
jmullier@idl.net.au
Copyright
notice
Neon
Genesis Evangelion and associated characters are copyright Gainax and
associated companies.
Author
Notes
I hope I
haven't made any of the characters act wildly out of character. Also this fic
contains spoilers. It takes place after episode 24 and ignores events in
episodes 25,26 & the movies.
Any
comments and suggestions would be appreciated.
Thanks to
Greg Thomas for pre reading this part.
Additional
notes for version 3
Well I
have changed the writing style of this part. Also reworked several areas,
especially some parts of Shinji's dream sequence.
******************************************
Shinji's
Decision
Part Two -
Awakenings/ Will you do it one more time?
Gendo
Ikari's Office
Gendo and
Fuyutsuki are discussing the day's events. Fuyutsuki is sitting down on one
side of the desk; Gendo is sitting down on the other side with his hands
steepled in front of his face. Fuyutsuki comments, "It would appear that the
report was correct."
Gendo
coldly replies, "Yes it would appear that it was. My son has acted exactly how
I expected him to."
'Its
times like this I wounder about you Ikari.' "So I take it this was in the 'scenario'."
"Correct.
Everything is coming into place. The time will be soon upon us."
'I wounder
Ikari, has it all been worth it?' "And what of SEELE?"
"My
sources reveal that the old men won't act until all nine production series are
finished. They currently only have five finished, it will apparently take at
least six more months to finish the other units."
"I see."
Gendo then
orders Fuyutsuki, "Contact major Katsuragi, tell her I wish to see her."
Fuyutsuki
frowns slightly as he replies, "Is that wise? She won't be in a very receptive
frame of mind at the moment, considering recent events."
Gendo
coldly replies, "That is exactly what I expect."
"So you
have already worked out how major Katsuragi will react and your responses to
her?"
"Correct."
'One
day Ikari someone or something will not react exactly as you expect. I only
hope that for everyone's sake that the outcome of that happening isn't
terminal........ for all of humanity.'
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Emergency
Ward - Nerv Hospital
An
extremely worried looking Misato is pacing outside the emergency room doors. 'I
should have seen it coming. He was so depressed for the last week, I should
have tried harder to comfort him. I wondered why his attitude suddenly changed
this morning, he must have made his decision during that walk yesterday. He
must have gone to see Asuka and Touji to say goodbye.......... Why now Shinji?
Kaworu was supposedly the 17th and last angel, so all of this should be over
soon. Why couldn't you wait?' A doctor comes out of the emergency room,
Misato rushes up to see him and asks, "How is he doctor?"
The doctor
calmly replies, "Well, it was a close call for a while, if he was left for
another hour he would have been dead. At the moment he is in a serious but stable
condition, he his breathing on his own though and will probably be nearly fully
recovered in three days."
A worried
Misato then asks, "Any chance of permanent damage?"
"None."
"So when
he recovers, he will have to be treated for what caused him to do this to
himself?"
"Yes. I
would imagine that you have some idea why he took this action?"
"Yes I do.
Unfortunately as you know, he does have a rather stressful job. He has had some
rather unpleasant things happen to him and around him lately and I think that
it all just came too much for him to cope with."
"Yes he
does. I had warned Doctor Akagi about this happening to one of the pilots. But
she said that the commander was aware of the problem and wished to do nothing
about it."
Before she
can reply Misato's mobile phone rings and she reaches into her jacket pocket to
answer it. She turns to the doctor and says to him, "Excuse me doctor." She
then walks a short distance away and answers the phone, "Hello, yes. Yes, vice
commander, the commander wishes to see me, but I am at the hospital seeing how
Shinji is. Yes sir I understand, I will be there right away." She then turns the phone off, and growls in
anger, "arrrrgh." 'What could that cold bastard of want with me, its not
like he will be worried about his son; he never has been before, unless he has
some use for him. Maybe he plans to get rid of me now as he no longer has a use
for me either.' Misato then starts walking towards Gendo's office.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Gendo
Ikari's Office
Misato is
struggling to keep her emotions under control as she walks up to Gendo's office
and knocks on the door. Gendo's voice orders through the door intercom, "Come
in major."
Misato
walks into Gendo's office. Gendo is sitting down at his desk in his usual
position with his hands steepled in front of his face. Fuyutsuki is standing
next to him. Once Misato is standing at attention in front of Gendo's desk she
asks, "You wished to see me sir?"
Without
moving his hands Gendo coldly replies, "Yes major Katsuragi, I did. I take it
that you have been visiting the third child in hospital?"
After
hearing Gendo's tone Misato struggles to contain her anger. 'He can't even
call his own son by his name.' "Yes I was."
"You are
to tell no one that he is in hospital you understand? And if by some chance
they do find out that he is in hospital the true circumstances of his admission
to hospital are not to be revealed."
"Yes sir.
But why?"
In a commanding
tone Gendo replies, "That is none of your concern major. Also no one is allowed
to visit him in hospital at all. This order also includes yourself."
While she
was expecting Gendo to be cold hearted, his order shocks Misato, "……Why?"
"I have my
reasons, again it is none of your concern major Katsuragi. In fact after
letting this happen to him, think yourself lucky if I let him remain living
with you after this."
Misato
looses control of her temper after hearing this and angrily replies, "Arrrrgh.
MY FAULT!!!!!! YOU THINK THAT THIS MY FAULT? DON'T YOU THINK I TRIED TO COMFORT
HIM? I TOOK HIM INTO MY HOME, I TREATED HIM ALMOST LIKE HE WAS MY OWN SON. IF
ANYONE IS AT FAULT IT IS YOU BECAUSE OF YOUR COLD HEARTED ATTITUDE TOWARDS
HIM."
In an
attempt to stop Misato angering Gendo any further, Fuyutsuki sternly commands
her, "That's enough major Katsuragi." 'I don't entirely disagree with you
major, but there is nothing you or I can do to change his mind.'
With a
hint of anger in his voice Gendo tells Misato, "I take it that you don't want
to be in the cell next to your former friend Dr Akagi? Or would you prefer the
fate I had you deliver to that spy Ryouji Kaji?"
Misato
calms down a little before she answers, "No sir." 'You cold hearted
bastard.'
"Then you
will follow my orders. Dismissed."
Misato
turns and gathers all of her self control and walks calmly out of Gendo's
office. Once she is the hallway outside and the door has shut it is another
matter though. She yells in frustration , "AAARRRRRGGGHHHH."
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Shinji's
Mind - the next day
In Shinji's mind the image of an old train carriage appears,
he is sitting with his head bowed on one side of the carriage. Seated on the
opposite side silhouetted by the bright light coming in through the window is a
younger version of himself. The younger version of Shinji scornfully asks him,
"So, you tried to run away
from reality again."
Shinji
calmly replies, "I didn't run away."
"No, you
didn't physically run away from Nerv this time, but isn't what you have done
the same?"
Ashamed
Shinji stares at the floor and replies, ":
....... I suppose so."
"By trying
to kill yourself, you were trying to leave all of this behind you."
"Yes. I have
had enough of all this pain."
"So you
were just going to end it all and to hell with the consequences?"
"Yes."
"And leave
everyone who cares for you behind?"
"Yes."
"Kaworu
was right you know."
"What do
you mean?"
"He may
have been an angel but what he said about you being afraid of others is true."
"What do
you mean?"
"About
what he said about you being afraid of getting too close to someone out of fear
of them hurting you."
"Maybe I
am. But even he caused me pain. Like I said I have had enough of all this pain,
it is not worth living any more."
Shinji's
answer angers the younger Shinji who unsympathetically replies, "NO YOU ARE
WRONG, while the pain is not pleasant, it is a unfortunate part of life. Don't
you remember what Kaji told you about pain making it easier to be kind to
others?"
"Y..yes I
do."
"You seem
to have forgotten what he meant though. You do feel for your friends don't
you?"
Shinji
replies, "Yes, I do."
"And they
care for you in return."
"They only
care for me because I pilot Unit 01."
"You are
wrong, that's what you wish to believe,
but your friends do care for the real Shinji Ikari."
Puzzled by
what the younger version of himself is referring to Shinji asks, " ......The real Shinji Ikari?"
"Yes the
real Shinji Ikari. Despite the rather low opinion you have of yourself, you are
not a coward, or a wimp, or a totally worthless person, you only think that you
are."
"You are
wrong."
The
younger Shinji angrily tells Shinji, "NO! It is you that wrong."
"But why
would they care for me?"
"Because
they consider you a good friend."
Shinji
hesitates before softly replying, "Perhaps they do........"
"They care
enough to worry about you when you are hurt, as well as forgiving you for any
mistakes that you may make."
"But why
would they forgive me? Especially after what I have done?"
"Sigh.....
because they are your friends. Touji has forgiven you twice."
"Twice?"
"Yes
twice. He came and saw you when you were leaving after the battle with the 4th angel.
Before that battle he blamed you for the injuries his sister suffered during
the attack of the 3rd angel. But he realised that he was wrong and came to say
goodbye to you at the train station, he even wanted you to hit him so there
would be no hard feelings between the two of you. And of course there was just
the other day as well. When he told you despite what happened to him during the
thirteenth angel, he doesn't blame you and he still considers you his friend."
"Yes he
does. Touji and Kensuke are good friends, although they are trying to embarrass
me most of the time."
"That is a
sign that they are true friends. They are just trying to make you loosen up a
little."
"I suppose
that you are right."
"But they
are not your only friends. Rei is one as well, you even told her yourself
before you did this to yourself."
"…..Yes… Rei……how could I forget her."
"She may
have been the second Rei instead of the current one, but she cared enough to
say that she would protect you during the attack of the 5th angel. And protect
you she did, didn't she. Even if it meant that she may have been injured or
even killed."
"Yes she
did."
"And of
course we won't forget what she did for you during the attack of the 16th
angel."
"
......... Yes ......... I could never forget that...... especially considering
what I found out afterwards."
"She was
concerned for you when you were in hospital after the attack of the 12th
angel."
"What do
you mean?"
"Don't you
remember her telling you that you could rest as both her and Asuka would take
care of everything. And how she was pleased to find out that were feeling fine.
She does really care for you, you know."
"Yes she
does."
"Someone
else who cares for you was going to visit you that time as well."
Shinji soon
realises who the younger version of himself is referring to and asks, "
......Asuka?"
"Yes,
Asuka was going to see how you were that time, but it would appear that she
changed her mind after seeing Rei leave the room."
Shinji
dryly replies, "She was probably only going to torment me some more."
"But Asuka
does care for you, she came to see how you were after the battle with the 14th
angel, didn't she?"
"Yes she
did, I think that she was curious about what happened to me, its not like she
likes me or anything, in fact she probably detests me by the way she treats
me."
"But she
does care for you, don't you remember the images and feelings from Asuka's
memories of you that you saw when you
did the sync tests in Unit 02."
"Then why
did she hide them from me?"
"She is
like you, she has trouble expressing her true feelings towards others. Anyway
she did sort of try to tell you when she came and saw you in hospital after the
14th angel, but you were too shocked about what she told you to recognise it."
FLASHBACK
Nerv
Hospital room 107 - 31 days after the battle with the 14th angel
Shinji is
laying in bed asleep; Asuka is sitting in a chair beside the bed. Shinji slowly
awakens and tries to focus his eyes .As the ceiling comes into focus he soon
realises where is he is. "Uh .. ......Not here again. I hate this place."
Asuka
greets him, "Welcome back third child."
Surprised
by hearing Asuka's voice Shinji looks around and sees that she is sitting in a
chair next to his hospital bed. ".......Asuka!!! Wh ....what are you doing here?"
Peeved by
Shinji's reaction to her being there Asuka irately replies, "Humph. What do you
expect you baka? I came to see how you were after your ...... little
disappearing act, just don't get any ideas though."
Asuka's answer
puzzles Shinji so he asks her, "Disappearing act? What do you mean Asuka? I was
going to leave Tokyo 3 and Nerv for good. But after I saw that both Unit 02 and
Unit 00 were ............ um disabled while I was talking to Kaji and decided
to come back and fight. I remember Unit 01 loosing power while I was fighting
the angel. What happened? Did it go berserk again? I don't know what happened
after it lost power."
Asuka
stares at Shinji in amazement as she asks, "You don't remember a thing?
Especially after being gone for so long?"
"What do
you mean by I was gone for so long? I have only been unconscious for a day
haven't I?"
With a
very slight hint of concern in her voice Asuka tells him, "No. You were gone
for a month you baka!"
Shinji's
eyes widen in surprise at hearing this and he asks Asuka, ".......A month! What
do you mean by gone?" ." 'What in the world is she going on about?'
Asuka
stares at Shinji puzzled by his apparent lack of knowledge of what happened to
him, "You really don't remember a thing do you?"
Shinji
loses his patience at not knowing what Asuka is talking about and irately tells
her, "No I don't."
"I
shouldn't be telling you this, you were absorbed by Unit 01 when it went
berserk."
While
Asuka's reply did answer Shinji's question it just manages to puzzle him even
further so he asks her, "…..Absorbed?"
"Yes you
dissolved into LCL. Apparently all that was left in the entry plug was your
plug suit floating in the LCL. For a month you were nothing but liquid." After
hearing this Shinji's eyes widen in amazement and he just stares at Asuka. She
ignores his reaction and asks him, "So Shinji, why did you come back? I thought
that you said that were leaving for good and you were never going to pilot Unit
01 again."
" .....
Well I was sitting in the shelter during the attack when.... Um……." 'How do
I mention this to her, without getting hit?' "When Unit 02's head demolished half of the shelter."
Asuka
frowns at being reminded about that and angrily tells Shinji, "We won't talk
about that, all right."
Shinji
gulps at Asuka's reaction and then continues, "Yes. Anyway after that I got out
of the remains of the shelter when I saw Kaji watering his garden. I asked him
what he was doing there, he asked me the same thing. I told him that I had
decided never to pilot unit 01 again, he replied by saying that as he was no
longer on the combat roster he would like to be doing something that gives him
pleasure when he dies, as if the angel came into contact with Adam which is
held in the very heart of Nerv, third impact would occur. While we were talking
Unit 00 appeared still missing one arm and without a rife, all it was armed
with was an N2 mine."
"So that's
what wondergirl tried to do, but she didn't succeed did she?"
"No she didn't.
After the angel disabled Unit 00 and it looked like it was going to be
unopposed. Kaji told me that there was something only I could do against the
angel. That's when I realised it was up to me to stop the angel, if I didn't
fight it everybody I care for would be destroyed, you, Misato, Touji, Kensuke,
Rei. I realised that I couldn't let that happen, not when I could do something
about it."
"I am glad
to hear that. I must say that is a more sensible reason for piloting than the
one you gave before."
END
FLASHBACK
Once the
memory fades Shinji comments, "Well perhaps she does care for me."
The
younger Shinji replies, "Trust me she does. Now there is one other female in
your life who cares more for you than you realise."
"Who?
....... Misato?"
"Yes,
Misato does care for you."
"Sometimes
I think that she really does, other times its almost like we are tools in her
own personal battle with the angels."
The
younger Shinji angrily replies, "No you are wrong, she does genuinely care for
you. She took you into her home, she treats you almost like you were her own
son. Don't you remember her reaction to when she saw you were all right after
being released from Unit 01?"
FLASHBACK
Nerv
Hospital room 107 - just after Asuka has left.
Shinji is
laying in the bed staring at the ceiling trying to come to terms with what
Asuka told him. Misato comes running into the room and gives Shinji a big hug
and starts crying. "Shinji. You're awake finally. We all thought that we had
lost you this time."
Embarrassed
by being held in such a tight hug for so long Shinji asks, " ........... Misato
will you let me go, please?"
Misato
laughs as she lets Shinji go, "So how do you feel?"
"Fine." He
then notices that Misato's arm is no longer in a cast. 'So what Asuka said
must be true.'
"You gave
all of us a big scare young man. Do you realise how long you have been out of
it?"
"No I
don't. Asuka was here earlier and said something about a month." He then points
at Misato's arm and continues, "I doubted her at first but several things are
starting to make me think that I was gone for that long."
Misato
looks at her arm puzzled until she realises why Shinji is pointing at it. She
then asks him, "Oh, my arm? The last time you saw me it was still in a cast
wasn't it?"
"Yes it
was."
"So do you remember anything?"
"After
Unit 01 lost power, no. Not a thing."
"Well you
had us scared for a while."
"Why?"
"You were
absorbed into your Eva, Shinji and when we were finally ready to try to bring
you back, it looked like we had failed."
"But you
succeeded, I'm back here aren't I?"
"No,
Ritsuko had given up. When the entry plug opened by itself and started pouring
LCL everywhere we honestly thought that you had been claimed by Unit 01, but
suddenly it just spat you out of the core."
Stunned by
what Misato has just told him, Shinji tells her, ".............. I don't
remember a single thing about any of this."
"So why
did you come back and pilot again Shinji? I thought that you said you would
never pilot again."
"Because
of something that Kaji said to me. It made me realise that I could make a
difference by deciding to pilot Unit 01 myself, without anyone forcing me to."
"Yes, I am
for one glad that you decided to pilot again. The angel was getting ready to
kill me and everyone else on the command bridge when you came crashing in. That
was the most ferocious I have ever seen you fight in your Eva."
"I
realised that if it won everything that I have gone through would have been
worthless, so I had to fight to win no matter what. I also couldn't let it kill
you and everybody else there."
END
FLASHBACK
The
younger Shinji tells Shinji, "See she does care for you."
Shinji
answers, "I suppose that you are right."
"So have
you forgotten the reason why you pilot?"
"No. But
there is no longer a need to continue piloting Unit 01. There are no more
angels."
The
younger Shinji asks, "Are you sure?"
Shinji
hesitantly answers, " .........Well not really...."
"And yet
you still wanted to run away from everything this time?"
"Yes I
did."
"Misato
was right when she told you about running away, the night before you went to
visit your mother's grave."
"What do
you mean?"
"That nothing
is gained by running away, and that nothing will ever change unless you have
the courage to step forward. So are you going to continue to run away or are
you going to face reality?"
Ashamed at
what he had tried to do especially since he has realised that others do care
for him, Shinji answers. "No I will stay, I am tired of running away."
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Japanese
Government Secret Research Facility on the outskirts of Tokyo 3 - three days
after Shinji's suicide attempt
The
research facility is in a small industrial estate located on the very outskirts
of Tokyo 3, the devastation caused by the defeat of the 16th angel stopped
about three kilometres short of the estate. On the outside the research
facility looks like its surrounding factories, however inside it is a totally
different matter. A group of technicians are sitting down at control desks,
several scientists are standing behind them overseeing an experiment. The
subject of the experiment is in an adjoining room. It is a sealed laboratory,
with massive walls made up of two separate layers and having only one entrance,
which is sealed by a series of armoured blast
doors.
Surrounding the innermost wall is a magnetic cage. All operations in this room
are carried out using remotely controlled robotic arms. In the centre of the
room sits a container of partly frozen LCL, floating in this LCL is the embryo
that was stolen from Nerv. One of the technicians reports, "It appears to be
stable. No energy emissions detected."
Looking at
the video monitor of the container, the senior scientist comments, "It's hard
to think that this caused second impact."
One of the
other scientists adds, "And that this is the reason for all of those angel
attacks. I wounder what Nerv will do when they realise that it is missing?"
The senior
scientist replies, "Hopefully it will be some time before they do. But at least
they can't start third impact now." He then turns to one of the technicians and
orders, "Increase the temperature an other ten degrees."
The
technician answers, "Yes sir. Increasing the temperature another ten degrees."
Three
minutes later, the small embryonic form contained in the container of LCL
starts to stir. It starts moving with increased speed, at the same time it is
also starting to grow at an extremely rapid rate. The partly frozen LCL starts
to boil off due to the heat being released by the angel.
One of the
technicians looks up from her control console and in an extremely concerned
tone informs the senior scientist, "Uh. Sir.......the energy readings........"
The senior
scientist looks at the readings and his face pales once he sees them. Shocked
by what he has seen he orders, "What!!!!! Impossible, increase the cooling
rate, try to bring the temperature back down."
One of the
other technicians starts rapidly entering commands into his control console.
Extremely worried by what his console readings are showing, he reports the
readings. The tone of his voice showing his concern at what they are showing,
"It's not having any effect. It's evolving at a incredible rate."
The monitors
show that the container of LCL has disappeared and in its place is an object
emitting an extremely bright light about the same size and shape as a human.
The size of the object and the intensity of the light are increasing at an ever
increasing rate.
Another of
the technicians reports, his fear of what is happening evident, "Sir! The
magnetic cage won't be able to withstand these energy rates for much longer."
After
hearing this one of the lower ranking scientists comments, "We better hope that
it doesn't cause an other second impact right here."
The senior
scientist sadly shakes his head and replies, "It won't, it will go to Nerv in
search of the second angel and will initiate third impact."
Puzzled by
what the senior scientist has just said one of the technicians asks, "Third
impact? What do you mean by that?"
The senior
scientist sadly shakes his head and replies, "The end of mankind. We can only
hope that Nerv can stop it his time, for this angel is the true cause of second
impact."
A technician
screams out, "The readings are all of the scale, the magnetic cage will fail in
five seconds……….." The laboratory then disappears in a blinding flash of light;
the entire research facility follows seconds after. The screeching of an angel
can be heard, when the smoke clears from the explosion a large glowing humanoid
form about the size of an evangelion can be seen. The angel then starts slowly
walking towards the heart of Tokyo 3 and Nerv.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Command
Centre - Nerv Headquarters
Emergency
alarms start sounding, Misato comes running into the command centre. Commander
Ikari and Vice Commander Fuyutsuki are already at their command post. Puzzled
by what could be causing the alarms to sound Misato anxiously asks the bridge
crew, "What is causing the alarm?"
Shigeru
informs her, "A massive energy reading was just detected on the outskirts of
Tokyo 3."
Misato
quickly realises that there can only be one logical cause for such an energy
blast. "What....could it be another angel?" 'But I thought there were only
supposed to be 18 angels.'
Maya
reports, "The MAGI are unable to confirm the exact nature of the energy at the
moment, major. A blue pattern waveform has been detected however."
"Well,
what do we know about it then? Is it doing anything?"
Makoto
answers, "It is slowly approaching the centre of Tokyo 3, heading directly
towards us."
Misato
orders, "Put on the main screen."
Shigeru replies,
"Yes major." He then enters some commands on is console and the image of the
angel appears on the main screen. It is a glowing humanoid shape similar to an
Eva.
Seen only
by Fuyutsuki, Gendo drops his steeped hands from in front of his face and frowns.
He quietly comments to Fuyutsuki, "This is a rather unfortunate and unplanned
turn of events. Tarbis was supposed to be the last angel. This angel looks
disturbingly like the first."
Fuyutsuki
replies while still looking at the main screen in amazement, "It couldn't be
could it?"
With a
look of shear terror Misato stares at the image on the screen and screams,
"WHAT!!!!............. NOOO GO AWAY."
Makoto
looks at the image on the main screen and asks, "What is it? It looks a bit
like an Eva. Is it another angel?"
Although
she is no longer screaming at the screen in terror, Misato is still upset by it
as she cries, "No... no......not again......go away.....I thought I saw the
last of you fifteen years ago."
Fuyutsuki
quietly comments to Gendo, "Could it be? She was the only person to see it with
their own eyes and survive."
Gendo
presses a button for a private communication channel and picks up a handset and
orders, "Confirm the status of the subject of Project A."
A voice on
end of line immediately replies, "Yes Sir! Right away." A minute later the same
voice continues but in a rather shocked tone, "Sir, well…. the subject of
Project A is missing!"
The
expression on Gendo's face darkens as he angrily yells at the phone, "WHAT!!
FIND IT." He then slams the phone handset back onto its cradle.
Meanwhile
one of the few surviving defence towers starts shooting at the angel. The
missiles have no effect and are stopped by the angel's AT field. The angel then
lets out a screeching cry and sends a beam of energy towards the tower, which
disappears in a flash of light.
The
angel's reaction confirms Misato's fears and she starts yelling again at the
image on the screen, "No
......no......NO.
GO AWAY."
Shocked by
Misato's reaction to the appearance of the angel Shigeru wounders, 'What is
it that could affect the major like that?'
Makoto is
also puzzled by Misato's reaction to the angel, 'It is just an angel, but
why is the major so affected by it? It's no worse than any of the others that
we have fought' He then looks up
towards the commander's platform and sees commander Ikari's reaction to the
angel. 'Even the commander seems affected by it.' He then realises
something, 'Oh no. We have no pilots.'
Worried by
how Misato is reacting to the image on the main screen Shigeru hesitantly asks
Misato, "Major...... Major Katsuragi, what are we going to do?" He points to
the image on the screen, "What is that?"
Misato
recovers slightly before answering, "Well....it
looks....like.......like.....the first angel."
Both
Shigeru and Makoto yell in surprise at the same time, "WHAT!!!" Makoto is the
first to recover and asks, "How major, how do you know that?"
Misato
replies her voice still shaking, "You know how I was the
only................only...........survivor of the Katsuragi Expedition?"
"Yes."
"Well I
saw second impact first hand. That .........that......" She points at the image
on the screen, "Is.....is...is what I saw."
"I see."
'So that is what the angel that caused second impact looks like. No wounder this
angel has affected you like no other. Seeing that angel again would be the last
thing you would want to see.'
Shigeru
asks Misato, "Major what are we going to do?
We have no pilots."
Misato
shakily replies, "….I….I don't know." 'Shinji why did you have to try to
commit suicide now?' She regains her composure and asks Maya, "Have we
started to analyse it yet?"
Maya
replies, "Commencing analysis of the
angel now major."
Before
Maya can commence the analysis of the angel however Gendo orders, "Lieutenant
Ibuki cross check your results with those on file in file Nine Zero Omega Zulu
Five Seven Delta Three."
Maya
quickly replies, "Yes Sir." 'Could it really be the first angel again? How
do we stop an other second impact?'
One minute
later the MAGI come up with a result.
"Comparison
between data from the current angel and the data in file Nine Zero Omega Zulu
Five Seven Delta Three shows that the two are identical."
Seeing
this Maya reports, "Sir, the results are the same."
Gendo then
orders, "Classify this angel as the first."
Surprised
by the commander's order, Maya asks ,"The first sir?" 'How can this be
possible? No wonder Major Katsuragi is freaking out.'
Gendo then
angrily commands her, "You heard me, now do it."
Not
wanting to incur any more of Gendo's wrath Maya quickly replies, "Yes sir."
Fuyutsuki
turns to Gendo and quietly asks, "I take it that this is not in the scenario?"
Heard only
by Fuyutsuki a shaken Gendo answers, "No, it isn't."
Having
recovered from seeing her worst nightmare come to life Misato silently asks
herself, 'So it is the first, coming
back to finish the job off this time? With the second angel Lilith held
in Terminal Dogma, I would say more than likely.' She then gets a
determined look on her face and vows, "I will destroy it this time, for what it
did fifteen years ago."
Hearing
Misato's vow Makoto hesitantly asks, "Uh major, just how? Aren't you forgetting something? We have no
fit pilots."
Misato
turns to Commander Ikari and asks, "Sir permission to deploy a N2 mine to slow
it down. If this succeeds I will see if I can get Shinji to pilot Unit 01, I
take it I am allowed to see him for this?"
With his
hands clasped back in front of his face once more, Gendo nods and answers,
"Permission granted major, for both proposals."
Misato
turns to Makoto and orders, "Contact the UN, tell them we need a N2 mine
deployed against that angel ASAP." 'Let's hope that will buy us enough
time.'
Makoto
replies, "Yes major."
Ten
minutes later, the angel is still slowly approaching the centre of what was
Tokyo 3, it is still ten kilometres away from its target. A contrail from an
approaching UN bomber can be seen in the sky above. Makoto reports, "Major the
UN are deploying the N2 mine now, sixty seconds to impact."
"Understood,
prepare for detonation." 'I hope that this will slow it down.' The angel disappears in the large mushroom
shaped explosion of a N2 mine. The command centre shakes from the shock wave, and
the main screen goes blank as the sensors shutdown due to the electromagnetic
pulse from the N2 mine. Once the rumble of the explosion is over Misato
anxiously asks, "Did it work?"
Maya
quickly replies, "Sensors will be back on in five, four, three, two, one.
Sensors back on line, putting visual on the main screen now." The main screen
flickers back to life and shows the angel still standing but with parts of its
armour melted to various degrees of damage, it is standing with its shoulders
slouched and with its head leaning to one side .
Seeing the
damage that the N2 mine has done to the angel Misato asks Maya, "So we have
hurt it. Is it enough to slow it down until we are ready?"
Maya
checks the readouts on her console and answers, "The MAGI predict that the
angel will have recovered enough to resume its attack in three hours."
"Well
that's should hopefully be enough time. Now to see if Shinji is well enough to
pilot and also if he will pilot again."
Like the
rest of the bridge crew Maya does not know the exact reason of why Shinji is in
hospital, all she knows that he has had a rather rough time of late. Maya
comments to Misato, "I wish you luck major. After what has happened lately I
don't think he will pilot again."
Makoto
asks Misato, "Yes major, how are you going to convince him to pilot again?"
Misato
replies to both Maya and Makoto, "Oh, I won't ask him myself. I know that he
will say no if I ask him at the moment, I have in mind two people, who he may
listen to."
"Who might
they be?"
"The first
and forth children."
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Pilot's
Briefing room Nerv Headquarters
Rei is
sitting down reading a book; she is dressed in her school uniform. Misato walks
into the briefing room and smiles when she sees Rei there. She then greets Rei,
"Hello Rei, I thought I might find you here."
Rei looks
up from her book and replies, "Major Katsuragi."
"Rei, are
you aware of what Shinji did aren't you?"
"No I am not.
He came and saw me two days ago and we talked. I haven't seen him since."
"So, what
did he talk to you about? If you don't mind me asking?"
"He told
me the truth about my origins, the fact that I am a clone, a clone made up of
mostly his mother's DNA. He told me that the difficulty he had dealing with
this fact was the reason why he had been avoiding me lately, as he did not know
how to act towards me now."
'I
wounder what her reaction to that was?' "What else did he tell you?"
"He said
that he now thought of me more as a close friend, now that he knew of my
origins and has now had time to think about them. He also said that since the
other clones had been destroyed, that I am now
a unique
person and should stop acting like I had a death wish. For if I am killed
again, I will not be replaced."
'It
would appear that you wanted to tie up some loose ends Shinji.' "So did he seem to be acting
unusual?"
"No. He
seemed normal. Why what has happened to him? Is something wrong?"
Misato
glumly answers, "You could say that. The other night after visiting you, Touji
and Asuka, Shinji tried to commit suicide."
Rei's eyes
widen in shock after hearing this, "Gasp........I see. How is he?"
"He has
recovered physically, as for his current state of mind, well I don't know
because as far as I know he hasn't awoken yet. Unfortunately I have to try to
convince him to pilot unit 01 again. Because as you are aware we are currently
under attack by an angel and at the moment we have no other method of
destroying it. And as we know unfortunately both Units 01 and 02 for some
reason won't let you pilot them."
"Yes."
"So I need
your help to help me to convince Shinji to pilot Unit 01. I am also going to
see if Touji Suzahara will help us. I am certain that Shinji may listen to both
yourself and Touji, where as he mightn't be that receptive to me at the
moment."
"I see, I
will help you major."
Misato
smiles at Rei as she replies, "Thank you Rei. Come on lets go and get Touji."
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Nerv
Hospital room 201
Touji is
sitting in a wheelchair at a small table trying to read a magazine. Misato
walks into the room with Rei, and greets Touji, "Hello Mr Suzahara, and how are
you feeling today?"
Touji quickly
returns Misato's greeting, "Misato!" He then notices Rei, "Hello Ayanami." 'What's
she doing here?'
Rei
replies, "Suzahara."
"I thought
I wouldn't see you here for a while Misato, especially with an angel attack
going on, or was that explosion earlier on the end of the angel?"
Misato
silently asks herself, 'How is he going to react to this?' She then answers Touji's question, "No.
Unfortunately the angel is still with us. I have a favour to ask you Touji"
"Anything
Misato" 'What could she want me to do? Its not like I can pilot an Eva
again. At least that's what I hope.'
"I want
you to go with Rei and try to convince Shinji to pilot Unit 01 again."
The
puzzled expression on Touji's face fades after hearing this, 'So that's why
Rei is here.' "Why Misato? Don't tell me he is running away again. He
looked like he had been having problems, but he seemed like he was getting over
them when he came and visited me the other day."
Misato
sadly replies, "Well you could call what happened running away."
"What do
you mean?"
"That
night after visiting you and Asuka, he tried to commit suicide."
'Oh
Shit! I should have realised.' "........... Well now that you mention it did almost seem like he
was saying goodbye for good when he left."
"I see, so
what did he talk to you about if you don't mind me asking?"
"No. He
told me everything that had happened since I saw him last, which as we know was
before I .....piloted Unit 03."
"Everything?"
"I got the
impression that it was. He started from when he was leaving Nerv after I was
hurt, and that he came back and destroyed the fourteenth angel. He then told me
about what happened to Asuka after the fifteenth and also about what happened
during the sixteenth angel and what he discovered about Rei afterwards. But I
got the impression that killing the seventeenth angel is what affected him the
most."
Misato
sadly replies, "Yes, Kaworu Nagisa, the fifth child and the seventeenth angel."
"I got the
impression that the fact that Shinji trusted him and considered him his friend,
and then to find out that he was an angel, was bad enough. But to have to kill
him, especially by crushing him in the hand of his Eva unit is what really made
him so depressed, for this time he was in control of his eva."
"Yes after
that he kept to himself even more than usual, he was barely eating, I was lucky
to get two words out of him all day. But the other day he had to do a
synchronisation test as well as a test to see if he could start Unit 02."
"Unit 02,
Asuka's Unit 02? She wouldn't like that."
"No she
wouldn't. Anyway Shinji just barely managed to start Unit 02, but since he got
better readings in Unit 01 and since Rei couldn't start either unit, we decided
that Shinji should stay in Unit 01. After the tests he went for a walk, on the
way back Hikari saw him and the two must have had a good talk."
"The class
rep came and visited me not long after Shinji did actually, she mentioned that
she had seen Shinji the day before and that he had been rather depressed."
"Well the
next morning, Shinji seemed to have recovered, he ate a normal breakfast and
asked what hospital room you were in."
"And after
he saw me I think he was going to visit both Rei and Asuka."
"So it
would appear. He told me about visiting Asuka, but I only found out about him
visiting Rei when I asked her to help convince Shinji to pilot."
"So
Misato, why are you getting Ayanami and myself to ask Shinji to pilot? Why
aren't you asking him?"
A sad
expression appears on Misato's face as she tells Touji, "I don't know how he
would react to me asking him at the moment. The last thing we talked about may
have pushed over the edge."
"
................. So what did you talk about that makes you say that?"
"He asked me
about what happened to Kaji........."
"And?"
"He told
me that he knew that I knew the truth about what happened to him."
"Which
was?"
Misato
hangs her head in shame and with a sad tone to her voice and replies, "That I
shot him."
Shocked by
Misato's reply Touji stares at her in disbelief and asks, "Why?"
"Apparently
he was spying against Nerv. Shinji's father knew of my connection to Kaji and
really gave me no choice, kill him or be killed."
"……So you
killed him?"
"Well I
only meant to injure him enough to slow him down, but since I haven't heard
from him since I think that I misjudged and I did actually kill him."
"You don't
know that for certain though do you?"
"No I
don't. I should have tried to explain my reasons and what I actually meant to
do to Shinji better, but I broke down crying and ran to my bedroom."
"Yes, I
can see why Shinji took that news rather badly. He though a lot of Kaji didn't
he?"
"Yes,
Shinji placed a lot of trust in him, he thought a lot of Kaji's opinion on
various things. I actually think that Kaji was probably the only adult that
Shinji would really talk to. You know it was Kaji who convinced him to pilot
again during the attack of the 14th angel."
"Yes you
told me that when you explained to me what had actually happened to my Eva and
the aftermath of that battle."
An awkward
silence falls for a minute
"So after
hearing all that, are you still willing to help?"
Touji
grins as he answers, "Try stopping me, its not like I was doing much at the
moment anyway."
Misato
smiles as she replies, "Thanks Touji. "
"So
Misato, why are we under attack by an angel? I thought that there were only
supposed to be 17 angels?"
"There are
only 17. Nerv was holding the first angel alive for some reason, and it somehow
got out of its high security storage facility and then attacked Nerv." 'There
is only one possible person who could have removed it from its secure
storage......... No....... it couldn't be.....'
Surprised
by Misato's Touji stares at Misato in disbelief and asks, "The first angel!"
"Yes the
first. The true cause of second impact which I saw it with my own eyes. I
thought that I had seen the last of that angel fifteen years ago. It was a
sight I wished to never see again......... So you see why we need Shinji to
pilot Unit 01 this one last time."
"No one
else can pilot it?"
"No one.
It won't start up with Rei piloting it. Since Asuka is in a coma we have even
tried Rei in Unit 02 as well, and we had the same response. So Shinji in Unit
01 is everyone's only hope, if he doesn't third impact will take place."
Puzzled,
Touji stares at Misato and asks, "Third impact? Shinji mentioned something
about that when he was talking about the seventeenth angel. Is it similar to
second impact?"
"Yes. Only
worse, this time it will mean the total extinction of the human race."
Shocked by
Misato's answer, Touji grimly asks, "I see. So we have no alternative other
than asking Shinji to pilot, do we?"
"Unfortunately
no. The last thing I want to do is to hurt him any more, but we have no choice.
I just hope he is up to it physically and mentally."
"He will
do it Misato, trust me."
"I hope
so, for humanity's sake."
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Doctor's
Office - Nerv hospital
The doctor
who is looking after Shinji is sitting down at his desk filling in some paper
work. He hears a knock at the door and he looks up from the paper work and
says, "Come in." The door opens and Misato walks in, once the doctor sees that
it is Misato he tells her, "Major Katsuragi, if you're here to see about Shinji
Ikari, he should be sleeping soundly. We have been giving a very mild sedative
to help him rest."
With a
grim look on her face Misato orders the doctor, "I want you to give something
to wake him up now."
The doctor
frowns after hearing that and in a concerned tone he tells Misato, "I would
strongly advise against doing that."
Misato's
voice hardens as she tells the doctor, "I can make it an official order if you
wish. If you wish to check my reasons and authority I suggest that you give
commander Ikari a ring."
"That
won't be necessary. Why do you need him awake so urgently?"
"We need
him to pilot Evangelion Unit 01."
The doctor
looks at Misato horrified by what she has just said and angrily replies, "That
is shear madness! Especially considering his current state."
"Trust me
doctor. I know that this the last thing that Shinji would want to do at the
moment, but unfortunately we don't have much choice."
Misato's
answer only manages to confuse the doctor, since he believes that the N2 mine
destroyed the angel. So he asks Misato, "Why is that?"
"If he
doesn't pilot Unit 01 we could all die Unfortunately the angel that attacked us
earlier on today wasn't destroyed by the N2 mine, it was only temporally
disabled. The only hope we have stopping that is by using an Eva unit. And
unfortunately Shinji is the only pilot left who stands any chance of piloting
an Eva."
"I see. I
will go and get the appropriate medication then. I will say one thing major, I will
like to go on record that I am doing this under orders only and do not consider
it in the patient's best interests."
"Your
opinion is noted doctor. I will sign his chart if you wish. Come lets go there
is no time to waste."
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Nerv
Hospital room 107
The
doctor, Misato, Rei and Touji come to the door outside of Shinji's hospital
room. Misato is pushing Touji's wheelchair. Misato turns to the doctor and
tells him, "We will wait out here and let you do your business doctor."
The doctor
replies in a slightly sarcastic tone of voice, "Thank you major."
The doctor
walks into the room and gives Shinji a needle. He then checks Shinji's readings
on the monitoring equipment and records the results. As soon as he has finished
doing this he turns the monitors off and disconnects them from Shinji. He then
walks out of the room and tells Misato, "He should be awake in five minutes. I
hope you know what you are doing major Katsuragi."
"I do too.
Thank you doctor, that will be all." The doctor then walks off. Misato then
turns to Touji and Rei and tells them, "Rei, Touji, I will wait out here. Let
me know when he decides."
Touji
answers, "Yes Misato."
Rei
replies, "Yes major."
Rei pushes
Touji's wheelchair into the room and places it next to the bed on one side, she
sits down in a chair on the other side. Five minutes later Shinji starts to
wake up, he groans and blinks his eyes to help them focus on the ceiling. He
soon realises where he is and mutters, "Ugh. Not here again......"
Seeing
that Shinji is awake Touji greets him, "Welcome back."
Shinji
turns to face Touji and asks, "Touji! What are you doing here?"
"I came to
visit you and see if you were any better. Anyway I am not the only person who
came to see you."
"Huh?" He
sits up in bed and looks around the room to see Rei sitting on the other side
of the bed. "Oh, hello Rei."
Rei
returns his greeting, "Shinji."
Touji then
asks Shinji, "I take it that you feel better for doing what you did?"
Shinji
remorsefully replies, "........... Not really. I couldn't even do that right."
Touji
sadly shakes his head as he tells Shinji, "You know Shinji, Asuka is right."
Wondering what
Touji is talking about Shinji asks him, "What do you mean?"
"When you
carry on like this, you really are an idiot."
Shinji
hangs his head down in shame and answers, "I suppose I am."
Rei then
asks him, "Shinji, why did you try to kill yourself?"
With his
head still hanging down in shame Shinji quietly answers, "I...I felt like I
couldn't take it any more."
Rei then
asks Shinji in a hurt tone, "Didn't you mean what you said to me?"
Shinji
raises his head after hearing Rei's reply and asks, "…..Wh..... what do you
mean Rei?"
"You said
you considered me a close friend."
"Y....yes
I did. And I did mean what I said."
"Well why did you try to kill yourself then?"
"What are
you getting at Rei?"
"Aren't
friends supposed to help each other?"
"...............
Yes I suppose that they are."
"So why
didn't you ask us to help you?"
"I just
couldn't. I couldn't stand it any more, I am sick of all of this pain. I wish
that I never piloted Unit 01 that first day, I should have gone back to my
teacher."
"So you
regret meeting me? I thought that you just said that you were my friend."
" ...N..n....no, I am glad that I have met you
Rei."
Touji then
asks, "And what about Kensuke and myself?"
"…. N......No I am glad I have you two as
friends."
"And of
course you would have never met Asuka."
Shinji
blushes slightly and replies, "..........Well......"
"Shinji,
you're stronger than what you give yourself credit for."
"What do
you mean?"
"I have
seen you down and out like this before. Like after you fought that angel with
Kensuke and myself in the entry plug with you. You were going to leave Nerv
then but you changed your mind and decided to stay. Hell, you even came back
when you had vowed never to pilot again after the......... 13th angel. I know that
you don't like piloting and you have probably been in this hospital more times
than you would like, but you kept on piloting."
Shinji
sadly replies, "Yeah and look where it got me."
Shinji's
answer angers Touji. "Look you're still alive and in one piece aren't you?
Although you just made a pretty good attempt to kill yourself didn't you?"
Shinji
lowers his head in shame as he answers, "Yes, I am not proud of what I did. I
was just running away again, I am tired of running away."
"I am glad
to hear that Shinji, so I take it that you won't try to kill yourself again?"
"No, I
won't."
Touji
hesitates before telling Shinji, "I don't know how to ask you what I am about
to. I wish I didn't have to ask you this Shinji."
Puzzled by
what Touji could be referring to, Shinji asks him, "Ask me what?"
"Will you
pilot again?"
In a
resigned tone Shinji asks, "Why what's the point? There are no more angels."
"Well no
new ones at least."
Puzzled by
what Touji has just said, Shinji asks, "...........What do you mean?"
"The first
angel is back."
Shocked by
what Touji has just told him, Shinji replies, "The first!!!"
"Yep, and
unless it is stopped it will cause third impact. You are our only hope to stop
it, or do you want me to try to pilot Unit 01?"
"Misato
sent the two of you to ask me, didn't she?"
"Yes, she
wasn't sure of how you would react to her considering your last conversation
with her. She does really care for you."
"I could
imagine." Shinji then lowers his head again, "I am really sorry for upsetting
her like I did."
"So will
you pilot again?"
In a
resigned tone of voice Shinji replies, "…..Yes .............sigh......I do it."
Rei gives
a small smile as she says, "Thank you Shinji."
Touji also
smiles at his friend as he thanks him, "Yeah thanks Shinji."
******************************************
Well that
is it for part 2. Like I said at the end of part 1 this part was going to be
where the 2 storylines totally deviated. Again any comments etc appreciated.
Stay tuned for part 3 - Here I go again/ The Sacrifice.
