Life had moved on. Vincent had started meeting with Merlose more regularly, but always at night. Carroll just watched. She watched both of them from the bright shadows of her life, wondering why things work the way they do.
She was alone in the apartment, standing in front of a slightly cracked, smudged mirror, (Vincent had gotten tired of trying to keep it clean) applying dark lipstick. She was dressed to go out, in a short black leather skirt, and a purple tank top, with high boots and fishnet. On top of everything was a heavy black coat, with a fur lined collar, which she wore open. She ran her fingers through her hair, which was bristling with hairspray that kept it spiked up, and messy. She sighed, and then smiled hollowly, turning to walk out the door.
Her hand was on the first set of locks when there was a knock. She stopped.
Whoever it was knocked again, and the knock seemed familiar, polite.
Damn, it better not be Merlose..
"Who the hell is it?"
Silence. She thought that it had to be Merlose, but slid the chain over and unlocked the rest of the locks, looking out. It was Merlose, and she was dressed up, very formally. Psh, some people had too much money. Carroll was irratated. She was already a little late to meet with some people, and they were the kind of people you don't want to keep waiting too long.
"What do you want?"
She put her hands on her hips.
Merlose just looked at her over her sunglasses, as if to imply that Carroll should know already.
"I'm looking for Vincent, he said I should meet him here at 9:45."
Carroll scoffed.
"Well you're early, it's 9:30. If Vince said 9:45 he probably won't show up before then. But you should probably know that."
It ws true, both women knew about Vincent's uuncanny habit of always being right on time to things. The door being open was causing the cold air to seep in.
"Can I wait inside?"
"Hell no. Firstly, I don't like you, or trust you for that matter. And secondly, I'm leaving."
"Leaving?"
Carroll glared, wondering if she was always this nosy.
"Don't even."
She closed the door, slid the chain off, picked up her keys, and walked out into the cold night. She might not have been dresed sensibly, but neither was Merlose, who tended to act like the weather had no effect on her choice of clothing. She was dressed in light silk, and for just a moment, Carroll felt sorry for her, like she wished she would have let her un. But it passed.
"Beautiful night, isn't it?"
"Shut up."
"Carroll, why all this hostility? I never did anything to you, really.."
"You're doing something right now. Lying through your teeth. You have nothing but contempt for me, and at least I don't try to hide what I have for you."
"Hm, I bet it's jealousy."
Merlose smiled. She was too beautiful, and that smile hurt Carroll in a different way then it hurt Vincent. Yes, it was a little jealousy. It was pain over the unfairness of things, that Vincent would love her just because she was beautiful, and because she happened to look like another angel...
"It's not! Your presence is just annoying me."
"It is..I bet you're in love with Vincent. He talks about you, you know."
Carroll was angry, but Merlose had thrown her off with the second statement, so that she was torn between yelling at her and asking her what he said about her. Merlose had done this on purpose, and had achieved the effect she wanted. Carroll just glared at her, noticing the trick.
"You bitch. Why can't you stay out of my life? I'd like you to stay out of both of our lives, but apparently that's too much to ask for."
Merlose smirked, and Carroll looked even more serious.
"Do *you* love him?"
Merlose brushed off the question, as if it were nothing.
"Still 'looking out for Vincent's feelings', Carroll?"
Her tone was mocking, and there was nothing Carroll could do about it. She couldn't do anything to Merlose, it would come back to Vincent, and she would pay for it...If not by his anger, then by silence. And that was something she needed less of from Vincent.
"Yes, I am."
It was quiet, an admission. No matter what Vincent said to her, she still believed that he couldn't look after himself when it came to women, or love. He was still a child in that, she knew him well enough at this point.
Merlose gave her a slight look of disgust, mingled with superiority. She was still smirking a little.
"You can see for him, but you can't open his eyes. Maybe I am using him. You'd like to believe that, hm? To be able to save Vincent from the impostor who stole his heart and live happily ever after. It would be sweet. But he won't let go of his belief, and it works for me, too. Maybe I should let him call me Lucrecia, eh?"
Carroll balled her hands into fists.
"Gods, I hate you! If I'm not good enough for him, neither are you, you self-serving bitch. I'm leaving. Have fun manipulating his emotions."
"Mm, I will. Oh, and he told me that you were a burden to him..."
This was met with shocked silence by Carroll. She stood there for a moment, then walked quickly to the stairs, and ran down them, her boots echoing off the cement. She stopped at the bottom, and leaned against the wall, her hands clenched and tears rising and threatening to show.
She had always been afraid of that. That she was nothing to him but trouble, and she had asked him that more then once, in occasional meaningful conversations. He had always told her that he didn't mind her bad habits, that it was overruled by the bond he had with her. She believed him then. But now she was thinking how Vincent tended to say things she wanted to hear, just to smooth things over, especially when emotional issues were involved.
She walked down the street and turned down an alley, her steps carrying her to where she wsa supposed to meet some person...a connection, most likely some dealer. She couldn't let her weakness show, so she hid the sadness, and let something more familiar rise to the surface.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
She checked her watch as she arrived at the club. 20 minutes late. Shit. She pushed her way through people just standing around and socializing, gtting some dirty looks but really not caring. She looked around, and then saw him. He was sitting at the bar with a few empty shot glasses in front of him. He looked at her as she approached him. He was handsome, but not very clean cut, he had a few day's shadow of a beard from not shaving, and his clothess under the leather jacket were kind of wrinkled.
But then, Carroll was used to dealing with people like him, or worse. She sat down on a bar stool next to him, and leaned an elbow on the counter.
"Hey, sorry I'm late."
The apology was careless, perhaps too much so, because it looked like he wasn't satisfied with that.
"Where the hell were you? You don't even live too far from here. You're 30 minutes late, you better have an excuse"
She ran through a list of them in her head before she decided the truth might be good.
"Some bitch showed up at my apartment looking for my room mate, I had to get rid of her."
The guy laughed, he was a little drunk, and going on very drunk, and probably a while mess of other things too. All druggies are the same, Carroll thought. But then, who was she to talk, she knew how it was.
"Some bitch, eh? Someone trying to steal your man, Carroll?"
Carroll tried to just brush it off.
"Naw, we don't have anything going on. We just live together, you know."
"Yeah, well if it was me, I'd give her a taste of something she wouldn't like."
Carroll was quiet. She was thinking about it, but she knew she didn't have the strength to actually do anything to Merlose.
"Let's go somewhere quiet and talk."
This was a code she understood a little too well, and she wasn't quite up to it tonight. However, she didn't have a choice, she had gotten paid off by an associate to find out what she could about this guy, and see if he would do buisness with them.
"Yeah, all right."
~~
They were in his car, it was a convertable. The cold air was getting to Carroll and she shivered a little. Then she noticed they weren't heading to another club, or even to his house, where most likely he would have other friends waiting, to talk and shoot up random stuff. He pulled the car to a stop in one of those dead end streets. It was too quiet, she was getting a little nervous. True, she did usually carry around knives, or a little handgun for protection for dangerous people, but she had been told he was a pretty straight character. She was starting to regret it.
"So, let's talk buisness first."
First. The word gave her a little shiver, her instincts were screaming to her to get out of the car and just run. But she wasn't very easily shaken, so she started to talk things over with him, money and drugs, information and meeting places. Then he broke out the drugs, and her body forced her mind into submission, as it always did with her addictions. Then he touched her. She froze in place.
His fingers were cold, he was wearing fingerless grey wool gloves.
"Are these dragons?"
He was tracing a line down the tails of the twin dragons she had tattooed on her chest, they interwined starting from just below her collarbone, where their tails lay, to about the bottom of her rib cage, where they interlocked in a deadly embrace, the red dragon (which had RAGE written beside it) biting the icy blue one, which said PEACE.
"Yeah.."
She lifted her shirt a little to show him the rest of it, and he caught her wrists, pinning her back against the car door, his breath smelling vaugely of alcohol. She ran through her options. Either let him do whatever he wanted, and come out alright, just a little violated (which wasn't so unusual) , or refuse him and make a break for it, which could end her up with a few bulletholes in unpleasant places. She regretted not bringing a weapon, and decided that she didn't feel like dying tonight.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
She was even colder then she was before. But now the cold was on the inside as well. Stumbling through the streets, trying to keep her mind off of what just happened. However, that left only one place for her mind to go. Merlose and Vincent. She found herself drawn to her sector. The beautiful houses, the manicured, decorated lawns with little flower gardens...
Carroll had found one of Merlose's letters once, and memorized her address, it was written on the back of the message, which was rather shor and impersonal. Merlose. Merlose. Her sadness was blinded by pure hatred, and her thoughts were also pretty obscured by the drugs. The darkness consumed her, and then she was standing in front of her house.
She was alone in the apartment, standing in front of a slightly cracked, smudged mirror, (Vincent had gotten tired of trying to keep it clean) applying dark lipstick. She was dressed to go out, in a short black leather skirt, and a purple tank top, with high boots and fishnet. On top of everything was a heavy black coat, with a fur lined collar, which she wore open. She ran her fingers through her hair, which was bristling with hairspray that kept it spiked up, and messy. She sighed, and then smiled hollowly, turning to walk out the door.
Her hand was on the first set of locks when there was a knock. She stopped.
Whoever it was knocked again, and the knock seemed familiar, polite.
Damn, it better not be Merlose..
"Who the hell is it?"
Silence. She thought that it had to be Merlose, but slid the chain over and unlocked the rest of the locks, looking out. It was Merlose, and she was dressed up, very formally. Psh, some people had too much money. Carroll was irratated. She was already a little late to meet with some people, and they were the kind of people you don't want to keep waiting too long.
"What do you want?"
She put her hands on her hips.
Merlose just looked at her over her sunglasses, as if to imply that Carroll should know already.
"I'm looking for Vincent, he said I should meet him here at 9:45."
Carroll scoffed.
"Well you're early, it's 9:30. If Vince said 9:45 he probably won't show up before then. But you should probably know that."
It ws true, both women knew about Vincent's uuncanny habit of always being right on time to things. The door being open was causing the cold air to seep in.
"Can I wait inside?"
"Hell no. Firstly, I don't like you, or trust you for that matter. And secondly, I'm leaving."
"Leaving?"
Carroll glared, wondering if she was always this nosy.
"Don't even."
She closed the door, slid the chain off, picked up her keys, and walked out into the cold night. She might not have been dresed sensibly, but neither was Merlose, who tended to act like the weather had no effect on her choice of clothing. She was dressed in light silk, and for just a moment, Carroll felt sorry for her, like she wished she would have let her un. But it passed.
"Beautiful night, isn't it?"
"Shut up."
"Carroll, why all this hostility? I never did anything to you, really.."
"You're doing something right now. Lying through your teeth. You have nothing but contempt for me, and at least I don't try to hide what I have for you."
"Hm, I bet it's jealousy."
Merlose smiled. She was too beautiful, and that smile hurt Carroll in a different way then it hurt Vincent. Yes, it was a little jealousy. It was pain over the unfairness of things, that Vincent would love her just because she was beautiful, and because she happened to look like another angel...
"It's not! Your presence is just annoying me."
"It is..I bet you're in love with Vincent. He talks about you, you know."
Carroll was angry, but Merlose had thrown her off with the second statement, so that she was torn between yelling at her and asking her what he said about her. Merlose had done this on purpose, and had achieved the effect she wanted. Carroll just glared at her, noticing the trick.
"You bitch. Why can't you stay out of my life? I'd like you to stay out of both of our lives, but apparently that's too much to ask for."
Merlose smirked, and Carroll looked even more serious.
"Do *you* love him?"
Merlose brushed off the question, as if it were nothing.
"Still 'looking out for Vincent's feelings', Carroll?"
Her tone was mocking, and there was nothing Carroll could do about it. She couldn't do anything to Merlose, it would come back to Vincent, and she would pay for it...If not by his anger, then by silence. And that was something she needed less of from Vincent.
"Yes, I am."
It was quiet, an admission. No matter what Vincent said to her, she still believed that he couldn't look after himself when it came to women, or love. He was still a child in that, she knew him well enough at this point.
Merlose gave her a slight look of disgust, mingled with superiority. She was still smirking a little.
"You can see for him, but you can't open his eyes. Maybe I am using him. You'd like to believe that, hm? To be able to save Vincent from the impostor who stole his heart and live happily ever after. It would be sweet. But he won't let go of his belief, and it works for me, too. Maybe I should let him call me Lucrecia, eh?"
Carroll balled her hands into fists.
"Gods, I hate you! If I'm not good enough for him, neither are you, you self-serving bitch. I'm leaving. Have fun manipulating his emotions."
"Mm, I will. Oh, and he told me that you were a burden to him..."
This was met with shocked silence by Carroll. She stood there for a moment, then walked quickly to the stairs, and ran down them, her boots echoing off the cement. She stopped at the bottom, and leaned against the wall, her hands clenched and tears rising and threatening to show.
She had always been afraid of that. That she was nothing to him but trouble, and she had asked him that more then once, in occasional meaningful conversations. He had always told her that he didn't mind her bad habits, that it was overruled by the bond he had with her. She believed him then. But now she was thinking how Vincent tended to say things she wanted to hear, just to smooth things over, especially when emotional issues were involved.
She walked down the street and turned down an alley, her steps carrying her to where she wsa supposed to meet some person...a connection, most likely some dealer. She couldn't let her weakness show, so she hid the sadness, and let something more familiar rise to the surface.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
She checked her watch as she arrived at the club. 20 minutes late. Shit. She pushed her way through people just standing around and socializing, gtting some dirty looks but really not caring. She looked around, and then saw him. He was sitting at the bar with a few empty shot glasses in front of him. He looked at her as she approached him. He was handsome, but not very clean cut, he had a few day's shadow of a beard from not shaving, and his clothess under the leather jacket were kind of wrinkled.
But then, Carroll was used to dealing with people like him, or worse. She sat down on a bar stool next to him, and leaned an elbow on the counter.
"Hey, sorry I'm late."
The apology was careless, perhaps too much so, because it looked like he wasn't satisfied with that.
"Where the hell were you? You don't even live too far from here. You're 30 minutes late, you better have an excuse"
She ran through a list of them in her head before she decided the truth might be good.
"Some bitch showed up at my apartment looking for my room mate, I had to get rid of her."
The guy laughed, he was a little drunk, and going on very drunk, and probably a while mess of other things too. All druggies are the same, Carroll thought. But then, who was she to talk, she knew how it was.
"Some bitch, eh? Someone trying to steal your man, Carroll?"
Carroll tried to just brush it off.
"Naw, we don't have anything going on. We just live together, you know."
"Yeah, well if it was me, I'd give her a taste of something she wouldn't like."
Carroll was quiet. She was thinking about it, but she knew she didn't have the strength to actually do anything to Merlose.
"Let's go somewhere quiet and talk."
This was a code she understood a little too well, and she wasn't quite up to it tonight. However, she didn't have a choice, she had gotten paid off by an associate to find out what she could about this guy, and see if he would do buisness with them.
"Yeah, all right."
~~
They were in his car, it was a convertable. The cold air was getting to Carroll and she shivered a little. Then she noticed they weren't heading to another club, or even to his house, where most likely he would have other friends waiting, to talk and shoot up random stuff. He pulled the car to a stop in one of those dead end streets. It was too quiet, she was getting a little nervous. True, she did usually carry around knives, or a little handgun for protection for dangerous people, but she had been told he was a pretty straight character. She was starting to regret it.
"So, let's talk buisness first."
First. The word gave her a little shiver, her instincts were screaming to her to get out of the car and just run. But she wasn't very easily shaken, so she started to talk things over with him, money and drugs, information and meeting places. Then he broke out the drugs, and her body forced her mind into submission, as it always did with her addictions. Then he touched her. She froze in place.
His fingers were cold, he was wearing fingerless grey wool gloves.
"Are these dragons?"
He was tracing a line down the tails of the twin dragons she had tattooed on her chest, they interwined starting from just below her collarbone, where their tails lay, to about the bottom of her rib cage, where they interlocked in a deadly embrace, the red dragon (which had RAGE written beside it) biting the icy blue one, which said PEACE.
"Yeah.."
She lifted her shirt a little to show him the rest of it, and he caught her wrists, pinning her back against the car door, his breath smelling vaugely of alcohol. She ran through her options. Either let him do whatever he wanted, and come out alright, just a little violated (which wasn't so unusual) , or refuse him and make a break for it, which could end her up with a few bulletholes in unpleasant places. She regretted not bringing a weapon, and decided that she didn't feel like dying tonight.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
She was even colder then she was before. But now the cold was on the inside as well. Stumbling through the streets, trying to keep her mind off of what just happened. However, that left only one place for her mind to go. Merlose and Vincent. She found herself drawn to her sector. The beautiful houses, the manicured, decorated lawns with little flower gardens...
Carroll had found one of Merlose's letters once, and memorized her address, it was written on the back of the message, which was rather shor and impersonal. Merlose. Merlose. Her sadness was blinded by pure hatred, and her thoughts were also pretty obscured by the drugs. The darkness consumed her, and then she was standing in front of her house.