Title: Falling into Temptation.
Author: Celebrian.
E-mail: Celebrian@datafull.com
Web page: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Celebrianlotrsfanfiction
Pairing: Elrohir/ Glorfindel
Rating: PG 13
Summary: After a cruel argument with Elladan, Elrohir´s secret feelings for Glorfindel are revealed, in the attempt to avoid the shame, he tries to escape to Loth Lórien finding himself caught in the middle of a snowstorm.
Disclaimer: I don't own them :o( But they all live in my mind.
Warnings: Will become NC17. A very ancient been is tempted by a very young one. If the age issues bother you stop here...
Author's notes: According to elvish majority standards. An elf reaches adulthood at the age of 50 our 21 equivalent. So in this story Elrohir and Elladan are between 40 and 41 elvish years. This would make them 17 in human standards.
Elvish Translations: Pen-neth: Young one. // Lirimaer: Lovely one. // Lasbelin* : Autumn. (name of Elrohir´s horse)
One of my betas made an allusion to the time terms used in this story. Hours minutes or seconds... I suppose elves had some kind of clock to calculate their time. Probably a sun clock ?...
Feedback: Please, Please! I beg of you.
Special Thanks to my Wonderful Betas Emerald and Elaine.
Elrohir was nearing the border of Imladris. A few more leagues and he would be able to find the main road.
This was an unsafe path for an elf to ride during the daylight, but at night the danger was even worse. Perils increased greatly when a traveller wandered alone.
Elrohir had never been away by himself, usually Elladan accompanied him, or Glorfindel, or even Erestor, sometimes. The young elf let a sigh escape his lips with a mockery of a smile lingering for a moment on them, as he remembered what had brought him to this situation... to this dark, lugubrious road in which the foliage barely allowed Ithil to illuminate his way.
Once more Elrohir sighed and tried, in vain, to concentrate in the sounds of his surroundings.
* * * * * * * *
"Elladan... Where were you? I have been looking for you!"
"You missed me already? I only left for a couple of hours..." Mocking his brother's anxiety.
"You said you were going to be gone for less than an hour!" Frustrated, Elrohir looked at Elladan.
"Calm down Elrohir!" Taking his twin by his arms to shake him out of his tension. "Calm down...and tell me what has happened."
"Lindir came looking for you. Father asked for you to help him with something in the kitchen..."
"Ai! Stop babbling Elrohir. Spell it out!" Annoyed Elladan stepped back, releasing his twin's arms and started to pace from one side of the room to the other.
"You were supposed to be here Elladan... You were grounded."
"I am not a child to be GROUNDED. I am 41 years old!" speeding up his pace Elladan looked at Elrohir. "And besides I am GROUNDED because of a little accident"
"You were supposed to be in charge of those animals. How could you not notice a wolf approaching that close?" Shaking his head in denial, the younger twin realised that he already knew the answer to his own question.
Elladan had been escaping with his new boyfriend, and usually, took the other elf with him, whenever they had the opportunity to be alone. And to pasture the sheep was an excellent opportunity to spend the afternoon in the clearings until the sun went down. "Forget I asked. I know your reasons"
"It was an accident!" Exasperated Elladan threw a cold glance at Elrohir.
"It was your responsibility!"
"What is this? Now you are on their side? You are speaking like them." Elladan recriminated him, trying to create some guilt in Elrohir´s mind.
"I am not on their side. I just think they..." Elrohir´s words faded as he realised that his brother would differ with him, and he was not going to create the perfect reason for an argument. "Listen to me. Some hours ago, after Lindir came looking for you, Father appeared...and you were not here"
"You told him I was gone?!" outrage showing in Elladan´s face as he assumed his twin's disloyalty.
"I told him I had not seen you."
"You could have invented some better excuse..."
"I was nervous... I could not think clearly. You know how father stares at you as if he is reading your mind." Elrohir´s eyes followed Elladan pacing nervously across the big room. "Stay here Elladan. Do as father says until he is no longer upset with you..."
"I can not live without his kisses Elrohir. I can not spend one day without seeing him."
"If you behave like a child, escaping every time you can, Father will continue treating you like one... He would probably add more days to your penitence, now that he is aware of your disobedience..."
"You envy me!" Were the only words Elladan could blurt. He knew he was behaving strangely but he was certainly * NO CHILD *. The fact that Elrohir, laughed at his words exasperated him more. His face was starting to warm up, giving his features a reddish tone.
"What are you saying?!"
Elladan turned to face the owner of the amused voice standing only a few steps away from him. " You envy that I had the courage to speak my feelings..."
"I will not argue with you Elladan..." Leaving the room Elrohir announced that Elrond waited for his older son in his study as soon as he arrived from Elbereth´s knows where. He reproduced the exact same words his father had said; to his twin, as he stepped down the main stairs, which lead him to the library.
Elladan was following him.
"You are jealous of me...."
Locating his book on one of the desks, Elrohir answered, not paying attention at all. He would not argue with Elladan. He would not please him this day. "I am not..."
"Because you are not brave enough..."
" I will not quarrel with you Elladan..." beginning to feel irritated, Elrohir tried to scan the book in his hands to find the chapter he had last read.
"You are not brave enough to tell Glorfindel that you love him!" Cruelty tinted the harsh words leaving Elladan´s mouth. "Then you call ME a child."
Elrohir swallowed hard, he could almost hear the sound in his throat "Shut up! Elladan!..." the raised voice commanded the older twin while Elrohir closed the book he held, staring intently at its brown, leather cover.
"I saw you. The way you look at him when he is in the middle of a lecture, the way you blush when he looks at you, or when somebody mentions his name." Measuring Elrohir´s reaction to his words Elladan continued his successful torture. He would show him WHO was the CHILD in the matters of love. "The way you try to be near him all the time..." An angry "Shut up!" came from Elrohir´s direction but Elladan went on. "I SAW you... how you touched yourself and made yourself come with HIS name on your lips..." a victorious grin decorated his lips.
With a sudden move Elrohir came to be in front of his older brother, hitting Elladan´s face with all the strength he had. He was enraged. Elladan did not think before he threw the corresponding hit to his brother's ribs. Punches flew through the air to find their final destination. The other's body. And in the middle of the fight both twins lost their senses of balance, crashing painfully on the stone floor.
For long minutes they brawled, until strong hands pulled a fuming Elladan off Elrohir´s body. Elladan was struggling to get free of the firm grip that restrained him from hitting his twin, who was trying to rise to his feet.
"STOP IT ! ELLADAN!" The one holding Elladan back said with an authoritative voice. "ENOUGH!"
"Glorfindel will NEVER notice YOU. You are but a naïve little boy" A hard shake came from the one who was still restraining him. Elladan tried urgently to free himself from the firm grip. Noticing that his struggles were unsuccessful, his eyes focused on his brother to see him stepping back groggily, as tears ran down his snow-white, pale cheeks.
"Elrohir..." Glorfindel´s sweetest voice called to the young elf whilst still firmly holding the other twin. Elladan twisted his head to match the familiar voice he had not been able to recognise, with the face. Praying to Elbereth that it was not whom he thought it was.
"Glorfindel..." Elladan mumbled cautiously. But the elder elf did not break eye contact with his brother who had just stumbled into one of the desks, before turning to run from the room.
"Elrohir!" was the last thing Elrohir heard before leaving the house.
Glorfindel calling for him.
* * * * * * * *
A strange noise brought Elrohir´s attention back to reality.
He was cold. It was snowing, and in his abrupt departure Elrohir had not considered the weather, or food, or anything. He had rushed to the stables, saddled his horse, and left, turning deaf ears to the warnings of the elf in charge of the stables. * There is going to be a snowstorm, Lord Elrohir. It is not safe for you to ride. Much less without the proper clothing...* He was right, the weather was turning worse with the passing of the seconds, and crossing the clearing ahead did not seem like a very good idea... The wind, without the protection of the trees to restrain its ferocity, was at least ten times crueller than on the road, or even more. Cursing with frustration, Elrohir checked his possibilities. Going back was out of the question; crossing the clearing seemed impossible, shivering as he was, Elrohir would fall from his horse with the first gust of wind that caught him off guard. But, on the other hand, he did not want to be found. Surely somebody was looking for him by now, and time was too precious to be wasting it seeking a refuge for the night.
The blizzard hardly let him see a few steps a head in front of him. * This is useless * He would have to wait till the morning sun cleared his way.
Elrohir spotted a big tree with thick foliage. That might help him a little. Dismounting from his horse, the young elf whispered to him to go find a refuge for himself.
Elrohir sat close to the trunk, trying to catch some of its warmth, holding his legs to his chest and resting his chin on his knees. He closed his eyes, missing the warm fire of his bedroom.
Hours had passed, and his body was getting colder, his hands, which had been reddish pink, were now white and frigid, like the rest of his body. His dark, silky hair was covered with frost.
* Be brave Elrohir... The sun must be about to rise...it will warm you up *
But more time passed and no ray of light came from the sky. How much time? To the frozen elf it seemed like hours, when actually it had been less than one.
His body began to stiffen, his eyes could not remain open. He was falling asleep.
The neigh of a horse forced Elrohir´s heavy eyes to open. Glorfindel was there.
Dismounting Asfaloth with a swift movement the elder elf quickly approached the younger one.
Although one part of Elrohir wanted to jump into his tutor's arms, to seek the warmth of his embrace, Elrohir managed to look away. "Go away..." He could hear himself muttered between chattering teeth. He would have stood, he would have run away, if he could only control his motions.
Heavy fabric was placed on his shoulders and pinned at the crook of his neck. The hood was pulled up to partially cover his face. Glorfindel´s hands cupped Elrohir´s cheeks in them but the tender touch was painfully rejected when the younger elf pulled away, "Leave me alone..."
With a sudden movement Elrohir found himself being carried towards Asfaloth.
"You are coming with me..." Glorfindel whispered reassuringly to him. And not wanting, nor finding another way to show his disagreement, Elrohir only sighed deeply.
Glorfindel sat behind him after rearranging the cape, so Elrohir was as covered as possible, then he pulled the slender figure to his own body to keep him warmer. After a few seconds of hesitation, the blond elf could feel Elrohir relaxing against his chest.
"Lasbelin* I need to find her..."
"She is at the camp. She is well."
The arm holding Elrohir around his waist tightened, preventing him from falling, as Asfaloth began to march in a steady pace.
Elrohir´s head snuggled into Glorfindel´s shoulder and, closing his eyes, he fell asleep.
****************************
"Elrohir...wake up..."
The sweet, yet unreadable, whisper said. Something Elrohir never heard before was behind that voice..."Elrohir..." The hand resting on his rib cage moved gently to wake him.
"I am awake"
"We are here."
Only two guards came to assist them. One of them took Asfaloth´s reins to lead him to a dry, warm place. The other led them to their quarters for the night.
Elrohir´s body was still frozen, he could not feel any part of it, his legs would not respond and it was impossible to calm the constant shivering. Glorfindel´s strong arms helped him off the horse and carried the slender body to a small wooden room.
There was a big fire flickering in the center, a bunk bed next to it. A small table was accompanied by two wooden benches and a tub full with hot, steaming water that had been recently prepared.
The elder elf placed Elrohir on the bedstead and removed his drenched clothes, his hands working quickly but smoothly.
It was then that Elrohir realized he was quivering uncontrollably.
"I am cold..." Elrohir said as the layers that seemed not to warm him before, left him one by one. His pale upper body was now naked.
"I know..." was the only response he received.
Glorfindel´s hands were now unlacing his boots and once they were off, he took Elrohir in his arms once more and placed him carefully in the scented water.
The cold, damp body trembled furiously as the hot liquid made contact with his skin. It was as if a thousand pins were piercing his skin.
Glorfindel´s hands could barely hold him steady while spilt water flooded the floor.
"It is too hot!..." Elrohir found his attempt to stand frustrated by a strong, restraining grip "... It is too hot Glorfindel..." . The younger elf's now flushed face, caught the blond´s gaze pleadingly.
"It is not hot..." The elder elf explained patiently to the pleading green puppy eyes. "... Your body is cold. It only has to warm up again..."
As the spasms eased, allowing the young half-elf to remain still, his tutor worked to free Elrohir´s hair from its tangles. He poured warm water to soak the long braids cascading trough his back, and with delicate movements he combed the dark locks carefully so as not to pull a braid.
After an hour in the hot tub the trembling had eased.
"I think you should get out now". Leaving the comb on the bench, Glorfindel stood to grasp some towels that waited on the bed's rustic coverlet. Elrohir, who was waiting for them, wrapped the lower part of his body in one and with the other squeezed the excess water from his hair in front of the fire. He was tired. He would allow the fire to work it's magic, helping every single drop of water to evaporate from his marbled skin. He watched his long time tutor quietly. The blond elf paced from one side to the room to the other, tidying the discarded trousers Elrohir had left at the bottom of the tub. * He has said nothing to me. No chastising. No sermon. No sign of his anger. And the little he spoke was so cold and impersonal, that it did not allow me to read the feeling behind...I have never heard that tone of voice before. He should be really angry ... but why?. Was it the fact that I am in love with him?, or ...*
"Try to rest Elrohir..." Glorfindel interrupted the young elf wonderings, without facing him.
Of course Elrohir could read the underlined message of that sentence... * Go to sleep. Elrohir. Stop staring... * The prince of Imladris pulled the bed covers down to slip inside. * I made you hate me... * Staring into the red flames, blazing in front him, Elrohir pulled the heavy covers up as he sighed once more. * You hate me... *. His body still shaking in spite of the warm fabric around his body, the dark haired elfling tried vainly to control it, gripping the sheet to his chest.
"Move over..." The still distant and unreadable voice said to him.
The slender figure moved to the side allowing the blond Lord to slip into bed next to him.
"Come here..." Naked arms pulled Elrohir´s body to a bare chest. Glorfindel had removed his damp shirt. "Better?"
"You do not have to hold me..." A timid voice responded while snuggling into the warmth of the other's embrace.
"You do not want me to hold you?"
His voice was calm, yet it sounded as never before. "Yes... But you do not HAVE to."
"I will keep you warm."
For some moments Elrohir concentrated on the movements beneath his head. The rhythmic ups and downs of Glorfindel´s breathing rocked him gently, and the steady heart beat worked as the sweetest of all lullabies. He would have fallen asleep, if not for the turmoil in his mind.
"Glorfindel?..."
"Yes?"
Elrohir left the security of his breathing pillow, to face at his tutor. "Do you hate me?"
" No. I do not hate you Pen-neth."
The conviction in Glorfindel´s hypnotizing voice was not enough proof for Elrohir´s ears so with out releasing the blond´s gaze he continued. "Why are you so quiet then?. You have not lectured me yet!"
"I do not feel like scolding you, Elrohir. When I saw you there, covered by the snow... I thought..." Breaking eye contact, the elder elf looked away. "What you did was stupid." He ended.
"I know..." The embarrassed voice assured, full of regret.
"You scared me." Glorfindel´s blue eyes finally allowed his heart to show. Despair finally rose in them.
"I am sorry."
"Try to rest..." Glorfindel shook his head, showing his disapproval of Elrohir´s previous actions.
The young elf rested his head on Glorfindel´s shoulder, while one arm circled the elder's chest. He would die if Glorfindel was going to hate him for his stupidity. Elrohir could not live with that.
Minutes later, Glorfindel felt warm droplets falling on his skin. Elrohir was crying.
"Elrohir?" Petting the dark mane of hair, Glorfindel tried to persuade his young charge to stop crying. "Elrohir please... Do not cry." His voice was the sweetest plea ever heard in the face of Arda.
"I am sorry...but I can not live knowing that you hate me..." Elrohir sobbed, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand. "I am sorry..."
Glorfindel let a deep sigh escape his lips, causing the weeping figure wrapped in his arms to increase the pace of his tears. "I do not hate you" His hand instinctively came to pet the young elf's shoulder. "You have to believe me"
"Then why do you feel so distant?" Elrohir moved once more to face the blue gaze of Glorfindel´s eyes. "You are here...". A timid hand found its place in Glorfindel´s heart. "Yet. you are not..."
"Ai. Little one..." The blond elf Lord whispered, losing all the ability to hide his feelings. That control had been saving him from Elrohir´s innocent and unconscious seduction. His younger student was not aware that every movement, every soft word, every friendly touch, every smile, was a torture to his senses and his heart.
Elrohir noticed the change, he remembered this look, but something deeper was shown in it, deeper that what he thought he distinguished the first time he paid attention.
Love. But not the one a tutor felt for his pupil, but love of a lover who cherished the other. He could now clearly tell.
The young elf bent, approaching those alluring lips that parted in expectation. Uncertain, his lips found Glorfindel´s, one part of him still feared he had misread his tutor's feelings, and that he would find himself pushed away; but that moment never came. Instead Elrohir found his way in to the warmth of Glorfindel´s mouth. The blond elf closed his eyes with a small cry of pleasure as Elrohir gained confidence and deepened the kiss, masterfully teasing his tongue, which, nearly as insecure as the younger´s, started to respond, welcoming the kiss.
Glorfindel´s hands caressed Elrohir´s back, pressing them almost imperceptibly together, as their tongues danced a torturing hot dance. Burning flesh met burning flesh as the dark haired elf teasingly pressed his body against his tutor's. Their chests rubbed together, Elrohir´s hard nipples pressing against awakened flesh.
Their lips parted only when the need for air become unbearable.
Between half open eyelids Glorfindel could see Elrohir looking at him, as if trying to memorize every line of his features. His loving fingers joined the expedition, tracing the lines that defined his still parted lips. The image of those fingers in his mouth was so strong in his mind that he had to pull them away gently with his own, to place a sweet kiss on them, before placing the hand, back on his heart.
"I love you..." Blue eyes pierced Elrohir´s green, pleading them not to speak. "I know what I am saying... I do love you."
"You are too young lirimaer..." Breathlessly the elf Lord petted the elfling´s hair.
"I know what I want Glorfindel... And it is you ..."
"Elrohir..."
"I want you, Glorfindel. I love you" The prince's hand started to caress the blond elf's cheek, ending the soft motion on his lips. They parted as a delicate thumb moved faintly on them.
Glorfindel closed his eyes, forbidding himself to pull the tempting finger into his mouth and suck it, all his body hurt with need, a need, which will not be fulfilled this night.
Featherlike lips pressed against his own rewarding his self control. Another moan of repressed desire left his lungs. These were indeed the most loving kisses Glorfindel had ever tasted in his all life but his hands gently worked to pulled the young elf away.
"I thought... you were enjoying the kiss..." Puzzled eyes looked at him. "Did I do something wrong?..."
"No. I was enjoying the kiss Elrohir" *From now own your lips will be the only ones I will remember and wish for * Glorfindel wanted to add, but he knew it would make it even more difficult to prove the point he was supposed to show. "This is not right..."
He said, also trying to convince himself.
"But I do LOVE you... Is that not enough?"
"You need to experience a lot, Pen-neth." The elder elf pulled a dark strand behind the pointy ear. * Only then will you understand what you are offering me.*
"In a few years from now, you will find that what you thought it was love was no more but the attraction of a student for his tutor" With a silent sigh he continued. "You might even regret that your first kiss was shared with an old elf like me, instead of with a young maid or boy, as young and fair as yourself."
"You do not love me?" Heartbroken Elrohir pulled away from the warm embrace.
"Elrohir..."
Glorfindel´s pleading hand tried to hold Elrohir´s shoulder, only to find it shrugged away with a sudden movement. The dark haired elf cupped his face in his hands as tears started to run across his blushed features.
"Ai. Elrohir... I do not know how not to hurt you...Please do not cry...My heart can not bare to see you cry..." Glorfindel´s words seemed to cause more pain in Elrohir´s soul, for the sobbing increased considerably. As the whimpering sounds grew deeper, so did Glorfindel´s ache. He truly could not bear to see Elrohir hurting. Every single tear that left those young, inexperienced eyes pained his heart to the point of despair.
Impulsively, the blond elf moved closer pulling his trembling charge into a tight embrace.
"No! I do not want you to hold me... it hurts to know that you will never love me... and your touch... is no more than a treacherous illusion of what I will never have..."
Tightening his grip around the struggling elf in his arms Glorfindel managed to pull Elrohir´s cheek up to cover it with adoring kisses. When the struggles ceased he placed his lips against Elrohir´s in a reassuring kiss. "I do love you Elrohir... more than anything on the face of Arda" he stated, locking their gazes together.
"Then why?...I..."
Shushing the distress in the object of his affection's voice with another light kiss the blond Lord continued. "I will wait for you... I will wait for you to find out and experience everything you want or need... and then... If you still feel what you are feeling at this moment."
"I will..." The anxious voice interrupted, making Glorfindel suppress a chuckle.
"If you still love me... Then I will be yours..."
Elrohir tightened his arms around his tutor's neck resting his head on his shoulder petting the straight, golden, hair, after kissing his cheek.
* You will break my heart lirimaer... More than you can imagine...More than you can imagine...*
Glorfindel held him tightly, suddenly not wanting to let him go. Because he was perfectly aware of what he had recently asked of his young charge. And, all of a sudden, he wanted to take all his words back. He did not wanted Elrohir to feel the lips, the touch or passion, of any but his own.
TBC...
Consulted sources:
* "The Folly of Starlight" series. Footnotes chapter "Another Day" referring to Elvish majority standards. www.ithilas.com
* The grey company. Phrase book.
* Sindarin Dictionary, "The Sindarin Dictionary Project" Compiled by Didier Willies.
Author: Celebrian.
E-mail: Celebrian@datafull.com
Web page: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Celebrianlotrsfanfiction
Pairing: Elrohir/ Glorfindel
Rating: PG 13
Summary: After a cruel argument with Elladan, Elrohir´s secret feelings for Glorfindel are revealed, in the attempt to avoid the shame, he tries to escape to Loth Lórien finding himself caught in the middle of a snowstorm.
Disclaimer: I don't own them :o( But they all live in my mind.
Warnings: Will become NC17. A very ancient been is tempted by a very young one. If the age issues bother you stop here...
Author's notes: According to elvish majority standards. An elf reaches adulthood at the age of 50 our 21 equivalent. So in this story Elrohir and Elladan are between 40 and 41 elvish years. This would make them 17 in human standards.
Elvish Translations: Pen-neth: Young one. // Lirimaer: Lovely one. // Lasbelin* : Autumn. (name of Elrohir´s horse)
One of my betas made an allusion to the time terms used in this story. Hours minutes or seconds... I suppose elves had some kind of clock to calculate their time. Probably a sun clock ?...
Feedback: Please, Please! I beg of you.
Special Thanks to my Wonderful Betas Emerald and Elaine.
Elrohir was nearing the border of Imladris. A few more leagues and he would be able to find the main road.
This was an unsafe path for an elf to ride during the daylight, but at night the danger was even worse. Perils increased greatly when a traveller wandered alone.
Elrohir had never been away by himself, usually Elladan accompanied him, or Glorfindel, or even Erestor, sometimes. The young elf let a sigh escape his lips with a mockery of a smile lingering for a moment on them, as he remembered what had brought him to this situation... to this dark, lugubrious road in which the foliage barely allowed Ithil to illuminate his way.
Once more Elrohir sighed and tried, in vain, to concentrate in the sounds of his surroundings.
* * * * * * * *
"Elladan... Where were you? I have been looking for you!"
"You missed me already? I only left for a couple of hours..." Mocking his brother's anxiety.
"You said you were going to be gone for less than an hour!" Frustrated, Elrohir looked at Elladan.
"Calm down Elrohir!" Taking his twin by his arms to shake him out of his tension. "Calm down...and tell me what has happened."
"Lindir came looking for you. Father asked for you to help him with something in the kitchen..."
"Ai! Stop babbling Elrohir. Spell it out!" Annoyed Elladan stepped back, releasing his twin's arms and started to pace from one side of the room to the other.
"You were supposed to be here Elladan... You were grounded."
"I am not a child to be GROUNDED. I am 41 years old!" speeding up his pace Elladan looked at Elrohir. "And besides I am GROUNDED because of a little accident"
"You were supposed to be in charge of those animals. How could you not notice a wolf approaching that close?" Shaking his head in denial, the younger twin realised that he already knew the answer to his own question.
Elladan had been escaping with his new boyfriend, and usually, took the other elf with him, whenever they had the opportunity to be alone. And to pasture the sheep was an excellent opportunity to spend the afternoon in the clearings until the sun went down. "Forget I asked. I know your reasons"
"It was an accident!" Exasperated Elladan threw a cold glance at Elrohir.
"It was your responsibility!"
"What is this? Now you are on their side? You are speaking like them." Elladan recriminated him, trying to create some guilt in Elrohir´s mind.
"I am not on their side. I just think they..." Elrohir´s words faded as he realised that his brother would differ with him, and he was not going to create the perfect reason for an argument. "Listen to me. Some hours ago, after Lindir came looking for you, Father appeared...and you were not here"
"You told him I was gone?!" outrage showing in Elladan´s face as he assumed his twin's disloyalty.
"I told him I had not seen you."
"You could have invented some better excuse..."
"I was nervous... I could not think clearly. You know how father stares at you as if he is reading your mind." Elrohir´s eyes followed Elladan pacing nervously across the big room. "Stay here Elladan. Do as father says until he is no longer upset with you..."
"I can not live without his kisses Elrohir. I can not spend one day without seeing him."
"If you behave like a child, escaping every time you can, Father will continue treating you like one... He would probably add more days to your penitence, now that he is aware of your disobedience..."
"You envy me!" Were the only words Elladan could blurt. He knew he was behaving strangely but he was certainly * NO CHILD *. The fact that Elrohir, laughed at his words exasperated him more. His face was starting to warm up, giving his features a reddish tone.
"What are you saying?!"
Elladan turned to face the owner of the amused voice standing only a few steps away from him. " You envy that I had the courage to speak my feelings..."
"I will not argue with you Elladan..." Leaving the room Elrohir announced that Elrond waited for his older son in his study as soon as he arrived from Elbereth´s knows where. He reproduced the exact same words his father had said; to his twin, as he stepped down the main stairs, which lead him to the library.
Elladan was following him.
"You are jealous of me...."
Locating his book on one of the desks, Elrohir answered, not paying attention at all. He would not argue with Elladan. He would not please him this day. "I am not..."
"Because you are not brave enough..."
" I will not quarrel with you Elladan..." beginning to feel irritated, Elrohir tried to scan the book in his hands to find the chapter he had last read.
"You are not brave enough to tell Glorfindel that you love him!" Cruelty tinted the harsh words leaving Elladan´s mouth. "Then you call ME a child."
Elrohir swallowed hard, he could almost hear the sound in his throat "Shut up! Elladan!..." the raised voice commanded the older twin while Elrohir closed the book he held, staring intently at its brown, leather cover.
"I saw you. The way you look at him when he is in the middle of a lecture, the way you blush when he looks at you, or when somebody mentions his name." Measuring Elrohir´s reaction to his words Elladan continued his successful torture. He would show him WHO was the CHILD in the matters of love. "The way you try to be near him all the time..." An angry "Shut up!" came from Elrohir´s direction but Elladan went on. "I SAW you... how you touched yourself and made yourself come with HIS name on your lips..." a victorious grin decorated his lips.
With a sudden move Elrohir came to be in front of his older brother, hitting Elladan´s face with all the strength he had. He was enraged. Elladan did not think before he threw the corresponding hit to his brother's ribs. Punches flew through the air to find their final destination. The other's body. And in the middle of the fight both twins lost their senses of balance, crashing painfully on the stone floor.
For long minutes they brawled, until strong hands pulled a fuming Elladan off Elrohir´s body. Elladan was struggling to get free of the firm grip that restrained him from hitting his twin, who was trying to rise to his feet.
"STOP IT ! ELLADAN!" The one holding Elladan back said with an authoritative voice. "ENOUGH!"
"Glorfindel will NEVER notice YOU. You are but a naïve little boy" A hard shake came from the one who was still restraining him. Elladan tried urgently to free himself from the firm grip. Noticing that his struggles were unsuccessful, his eyes focused on his brother to see him stepping back groggily, as tears ran down his snow-white, pale cheeks.
"Elrohir..." Glorfindel´s sweetest voice called to the young elf whilst still firmly holding the other twin. Elladan twisted his head to match the familiar voice he had not been able to recognise, with the face. Praying to Elbereth that it was not whom he thought it was.
"Glorfindel..." Elladan mumbled cautiously. But the elder elf did not break eye contact with his brother who had just stumbled into one of the desks, before turning to run from the room.
"Elrohir!" was the last thing Elrohir heard before leaving the house.
Glorfindel calling for him.
* * * * * * * *
A strange noise brought Elrohir´s attention back to reality.
He was cold. It was snowing, and in his abrupt departure Elrohir had not considered the weather, or food, or anything. He had rushed to the stables, saddled his horse, and left, turning deaf ears to the warnings of the elf in charge of the stables. * There is going to be a snowstorm, Lord Elrohir. It is not safe for you to ride. Much less without the proper clothing...* He was right, the weather was turning worse with the passing of the seconds, and crossing the clearing ahead did not seem like a very good idea... The wind, without the protection of the trees to restrain its ferocity, was at least ten times crueller than on the road, or even more. Cursing with frustration, Elrohir checked his possibilities. Going back was out of the question; crossing the clearing seemed impossible, shivering as he was, Elrohir would fall from his horse with the first gust of wind that caught him off guard. But, on the other hand, he did not want to be found. Surely somebody was looking for him by now, and time was too precious to be wasting it seeking a refuge for the night.
The blizzard hardly let him see a few steps a head in front of him. * This is useless * He would have to wait till the morning sun cleared his way.
Elrohir spotted a big tree with thick foliage. That might help him a little. Dismounting from his horse, the young elf whispered to him to go find a refuge for himself.
Elrohir sat close to the trunk, trying to catch some of its warmth, holding his legs to his chest and resting his chin on his knees. He closed his eyes, missing the warm fire of his bedroom.
Hours had passed, and his body was getting colder, his hands, which had been reddish pink, were now white and frigid, like the rest of his body. His dark, silky hair was covered with frost.
* Be brave Elrohir... The sun must be about to rise...it will warm you up *
But more time passed and no ray of light came from the sky. How much time? To the frozen elf it seemed like hours, when actually it had been less than one.
His body began to stiffen, his eyes could not remain open. He was falling asleep.
The neigh of a horse forced Elrohir´s heavy eyes to open. Glorfindel was there.
Dismounting Asfaloth with a swift movement the elder elf quickly approached the younger one.
Although one part of Elrohir wanted to jump into his tutor's arms, to seek the warmth of his embrace, Elrohir managed to look away. "Go away..." He could hear himself muttered between chattering teeth. He would have stood, he would have run away, if he could only control his motions.
Heavy fabric was placed on his shoulders and pinned at the crook of his neck. The hood was pulled up to partially cover his face. Glorfindel´s hands cupped Elrohir´s cheeks in them but the tender touch was painfully rejected when the younger elf pulled away, "Leave me alone..."
With a sudden movement Elrohir found himself being carried towards Asfaloth.
"You are coming with me..." Glorfindel whispered reassuringly to him. And not wanting, nor finding another way to show his disagreement, Elrohir only sighed deeply.
Glorfindel sat behind him after rearranging the cape, so Elrohir was as covered as possible, then he pulled the slender figure to his own body to keep him warmer. After a few seconds of hesitation, the blond elf could feel Elrohir relaxing against his chest.
"Lasbelin* I need to find her..."
"She is at the camp. She is well."
The arm holding Elrohir around his waist tightened, preventing him from falling, as Asfaloth began to march in a steady pace.
Elrohir´s head snuggled into Glorfindel´s shoulder and, closing his eyes, he fell asleep.
****************************
"Elrohir...wake up..."
The sweet, yet unreadable, whisper said. Something Elrohir never heard before was behind that voice..."Elrohir..." The hand resting on his rib cage moved gently to wake him.
"I am awake"
"We are here."
Only two guards came to assist them. One of them took Asfaloth´s reins to lead him to a dry, warm place. The other led them to their quarters for the night.
Elrohir´s body was still frozen, he could not feel any part of it, his legs would not respond and it was impossible to calm the constant shivering. Glorfindel´s strong arms helped him off the horse and carried the slender body to a small wooden room.
There was a big fire flickering in the center, a bunk bed next to it. A small table was accompanied by two wooden benches and a tub full with hot, steaming water that had been recently prepared.
The elder elf placed Elrohir on the bedstead and removed his drenched clothes, his hands working quickly but smoothly.
It was then that Elrohir realized he was quivering uncontrollably.
"I am cold..." Elrohir said as the layers that seemed not to warm him before, left him one by one. His pale upper body was now naked.
"I know..." was the only response he received.
Glorfindel´s hands were now unlacing his boots and once they were off, he took Elrohir in his arms once more and placed him carefully in the scented water.
The cold, damp body trembled furiously as the hot liquid made contact with his skin. It was as if a thousand pins were piercing his skin.
Glorfindel´s hands could barely hold him steady while spilt water flooded the floor.
"It is too hot!..." Elrohir found his attempt to stand frustrated by a strong, restraining grip "... It is too hot Glorfindel..." . The younger elf's now flushed face, caught the blond´s gaze pleadingly.
"It is not hot..." The elder elf explained patiently to the pleading green puppy eyes. "... Your body is cold. It only has to warm up again..."
As the spasms eased, allowing the young half-elf to remain still, his tutor worked to free Elrohir´s hair from its tangles. He poured warm water to soak the long braids cascading trough his back, and with delicate movements he combed the dark locks carefully so as not to pull a braid.
After an hour in the hot tub the trembling had eased.
"I think you should get out now". Leaving the comb on the bench, Glorfindel stood to grasp some towels that waited on the bed's rustic coverlet. Elrohir, who was waiting for them, wrapped the lower part of his body in one and with the other squeezed the excess water from his hair in front of the fire. He was tired. He would allow the fire to work it's magic, helping every single drop of water to evaporate from his marbled skin. He watched his long time tutor quietly. The blond elf paced from one side to the room to the other, tidying the discarded trousers Elrohir had left at the bottom of the tub. * He has said nothing to me. No chastising. No sermon. No sign of his anger. And the little he spoke was so cold and impersonal, that it did not allow me to read the feeling behind...I have never heard that tone of voice before. He should be really angry ... but why?. Was it the fact that I am in love with him?, or ...*
"Try to rest Elrohir..." Glorfindel interrupted the young elf wonderings, without facing him.
Of course Elrohir could read the underlined message of that sentence... * Go to sleep. Elrohir. Stop staring... * The prince of Imladris pulled the bed covers down to slip inside. * I made you hate me... * Staring into the red flames, blazing in front him, Elrohir pulled the heavy covers up as he sighed once more. * You hate me... *. His body still shaking in spite of the warm fabric around his body, the dark haired elfling tried vainly to control it, gripping the sheet to his chest.
"Move over..." The still distant and unreadable voice said to him.
The slender figure moved to the side allowing the blond Lord to slip into bed next to him.
"Come here..." Naked arms pulled Elrohir´s body to a bare chest. Glorfindel had removed his damp shirt. "Better?"
"You do not have to hold me..." A timid voice responded while snuggling into the warmth of the other's embrace.
"You do not want me to hold you?"
His voice was calm, yet it sounded as never before. "Yes... But you do not HAVE to."
"I will keep you warm."
For some moments Elrohir concentrated on the movements beneath his head. The rhythmic ups and downs of Glorfindel´s breathing rocked him gently, and the steady heart beat worked as the sweetest of all lullabies. He would have fallen asleep, if not for the turmoil in his mind.
"Glorfindel?..."
"Yes?"
Elrohir left the security of his breathing pillow, to face at his tutor. "Do you hate me?"
" No. I do not hate you Pen-neth."
The conviction in Glorfindel´s hypnotizing voice was not enough proof for Elrohir´s ears so with out releasing the blond´s gaze he continued. "Why are you so quiet then?. You have not lectured me yet!"
"I do not feel like scolding you, Elrohir. When I saw you there, covered by the snow... I thought..." Breaking eye contact, the elder elf looked away. "What you did was stupid." He ended.
"I know..." The embarrassed voice assured, full of regret.
"You scared me." Glorfindel´s blue eyes finally allowed his heart to show. Despair finally rose in them.
"I am sorry."
"Try to rest..." Glorfindel shook his head, showing his disapproval of Elrohir´s previous actions.
The young elf rested his head on Glorfindel´s shoulder, while one arm circled the elder's chest. He would die if Glorfindel was going to hate him for his stupidity. Elrohir could not live with that.
Minutes later, Glorfindel felt warm droplets falling on his skin. Elrohir was crying.
"Elrohir?" Petting the dark mane of hair, Glorfindel tried to persuade his young charge to stop crying. "Elrohir please... Do not cry." His voice was the sweetest plea ever heard in the face of Arda.
"I am sorry...but I can not live knowing that you hate me..." Elrohir sobbed, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand. "I am sorry..."
Glorfindel let a deep sigh escape his lips, causing the weeping figure wrapped in his arms to increase the pace of his tears. "I do not hate you" His hand instinctively came to pet the young elf's shoulder. "You have to believe me"
"Then why do you feel so distant?" Elrohir moved once more to face the blue gaze of Glorfindel´s eyes. "You are here...". A timid hand found its place in Glorfindel´s heart. "Yet. you are not..."
"Ai. Little one..." The blond elf Lord whispered, losing all the ability to hide his feelings. That control had been saving him from Elrohir´s innocent and unconscious seduction. His younger student was not aware that every movement, every soft word, every friendly touch, every smile, was a torture to his senses and his heart.
Elrohir noticed the change, he remembered this look, but something deeper was shown in it, deeper that what he thought he distinguished the first time he paid attention.
Love. But not the one a tutor felt for his pupil, but love of a lover who cherished the other. He could now clearly tell.
The young elf bent, approaching those alluring lips that parted in expectation. Uncertain, his lips found Glorfindel´s, one part of him still feared he had misread his tutor's feelings, and that he would find himself pushed away; but that moment never came. Instead Elrohir found his way in to the warmth of Glorfindel´s mouth. The blond elf closed his eyes with a small cry of pleasure as Elrohir gained confidence and deepened the kiss, masterfully teasing his tongue, which, nearly as insecure as the younger´s, started to respond, welcoming the kiss.
Glorfindel´s hands caressed Elrohir´s back, pressing them almost imperceptibly together, as their tongues danced a torturing hot dance. Burning flesh met burning flesh as the dark haired elf teasingly pressed his body against his tutor's. Their chests rubbed together, Elrohir´s hard nipples pressing against awakened flesh.
Their lips parted only when the need for air become unbearable.
Between half open eyelids Glorfindel could see Elrohir looking at him, as if trying to memorize every line of his features. His loving fingers joined the expedition, tracing the lines that defined his still parted lips. The image of those fingers in his mouth was so strong in his mind that he had to pull them away gently with his own, to place a sweet kiss on them, before placing the hand, back on his heart.
"I love you..." Blue eyes pierced Elrohir´s green, pleading them not to speak. "I know what I am saying... I do love you."
"You are too young lirimaer..." Breathlessly the elf Lord petted the elfling´s hair.
"I know what I want Glorfindel... And it is you ..."
"Elrohir..."
"I want you, Glorfindel. I love you" The prince's hand started to caress the blond elf's cheek, ending the soft motion on his lips. They parted as a delicate thumb moved faintly on them.
Glorfindel closed his eyes, forbidding himself to pull the tempting finger into his mouth and suck it, all his body hurt with need, a need, which will not be fulfilled this night.
Featherlike lips pressed against his own rewarding his self control. Another moan of repressed desire left his lungs. These were indeed the most loving kisses Glorfindel had ever tasted in his all life but his hands gently worked to pulled the young elf away.
"I thought... you were enjoying the kiss..." Puzzled eyes looked at him. "Did I do something wrong?..."
"No. I was enjoying the kiss Elrohir" *From now own your lips will be the only ones I will remember and wish for * Glorfindel wanted to add, but he knew it would make it even more difficult to prove the point he was supposed to show. "This is not right..."
He said, also trying to convince himself.
"But I do LOVE you... Is that not enough?"
"You need to experience a lot, Pen-neth." The elder elf pulled a dark strand behind the pointy ear. * Only then will you understand what you are offering me.*
"In a few years from now, you will find that what you thought it was love was no more but the attraction of a student for his tutor" With a silent sigh he continued. "You might even regret that your first kiss was shared with an old elf like me, instead of with a young maid or boy, as young and fair as yourself."
"You do not love me?" Heartbroken Elrohir pulled away from the warm embrace.
"Elrohir..."
Glorfindel´s pleading hand tried to hold Elrohir´s shoulder, only to find it shrugged away with a sudden movement. The dark haired elf cupped his face in his hands as tears started to run across his blushed features.
"Ai. Elrohir... I do not know how not to hurt you...Please do not cry...My heart can not bare to see you cry..." Glorfindel´s words seemed to cause more pain in Elrohir´s soul, for the sobbing increased considerably. As the whimpering sounds grew deeper, so did Glorfindel´s ache. He truly could not bear to see Elrohir hurting. Every single tear that left those young, inexperienced eyes pained his heart to the point of despair.
Impulsively, the blond elf moved closer pulling his trembling charge into a tight embrace.
"No! I do not want you to hold me... it hurts to know that you will never love me... and your touch... is no more than a treacherous illusion of what I will never have..."
Tightening his grip around the struggling elf in his arms Glorfindel managed to pull Elrohir´s cheek up to cover it with adoring kisses. When the struggles ceased he placed his lips against Elrohir´s in a reassuring kiss. "I do love you Elrohir... more than anything on the face of Arda" he stated, locking their gazes together.
"Then why?...I..."
Shushing the distress in the object of his affection's voice with another light kiss the blond Lord continued. "I will wait for you... I will wait for you to find out and experience everything you want or need... and then... If you still feel what you are feeling at this moment."
"I will..." The anxious voice interrupted, making Glorfindel suppress a chuckle.
"If you still love me... Then I will be yours..."
Elrohir tightened his arms around his tutor's neck resting his head on his shoulder petting the straight, golden, hair, after kissing his cheek.
* You will break my heart lirimaer... More than you can imagine...More than you can imagine...*
Glorfindel held him tightly, suddenly not wanting to let him go. Because he was perfectly aware of what he had recently asked of his young charge. And, all of a sudden, he wanted to take all his words back. He did not wanted Elrohir to feel the lips, the touch or passion, of any but his own.
TBC...
Consulted sources:
* "The Folly of Starlight" series. Footnotes chapter "Another Day" referring to Elvish majority standards. www.ithilas.com
* The grey company. Phrase book.
* Sindarin Dictionary, "The Sindarin Dictionary Project" Compiled by Didier Willies.