Title: A Passing Shadow: Book I: Deep Down Dark: Chapter 2
Author: VicNoir
Rating: R
Disclaimers: It all belongs to Mutant Enemy.
Summary: An alternative season 6 and 7.
By the time we got him back to the house, he was twitching quite a bit. Looked like jolts of electricity were going through him, and every once in a while he let out a little snarl.
"Buffy, it is absolutely unacceptable that he stay in your home. I appreciate that you feel compassion for him, but there is no reason to put yourself or Dawn in danger." We were sitting in the driveway, and Giles was trying to convince me one last time.
"Spike would never hurt Dawn."
"And you?"
I was less sure about that. I knew that he thought he loved me. I knew he'd tried to prove it more than once. But I also knew that I tended to bring out the worst in him, and... My train of thought was interrupted by another, louder snarl, followed by a really pathetic moan.
"It'll be OK. Besides, what're we supposed to do with him? It's not like we can just drop him off at the ER."
"He could stay with me. He has in the past. When the Initiative-"
"This is different. This isn't some stupid chip that gives him headaches. This is...he's going to need..." I stopped, because I realized that I didn't have a clue what he was going to need. But I was pretty sure that Giles-much as I love him-wouldn't be able to give it to him.
"Are you sure?" He looked so worried. Like this might really be a problem, after my mom dropping dead on me, and a hell-god after my sister, and the world almost ending again, and death, and resurrection.
"Yes. And besides, it'll make Dawn feel all grown up if I let her take care of him." Spike stiffened in the seat. I watched as his fangs appeared and he growled and groaned and kicked at the floor of the car. I looked at Giles. "Well, maybe not right away."
His body stilled and the fangs went away. We took advantage of the moment and got him into the house just as Willow and Tara drove up.
We put him on the sofa.
"Buffy..."
"I know, Giles. Will, could you go get a piece of clothesline out of the basement?" I hated to do it, but I knew I had to. We tied his hands together and then his feet.
Giles removed the bandages from his eyes and started to clean him up. Right about then, Dawn came downstairs. I met her in the hall and blocked her view of the living room.
"What's going on?" She tried to look past me.
"Spike had...an accident. He's hurt. It's bad." She tried to push past me and I caught her by the arms.
"Let Giles finish cleaning him up, then you can see him, OK?" There must have been something in the way I said it that made her stop and look at me again. Then Spike let out the loudest, nastiest snarl yet.
"Buffy!" Giles sounded like he was having trouble.
I spun Dawn around and gave her a push toward the kitchen. Then I went into the living room, but I had to force myself to do it.
Spike was thrashing on the sofa, and Giles was doing his best to hold him down and failing fast. I grabbed Spike's shoulders and pushed him back on the cushions, getting a really good look at his face.
They were gone.
Those blue-bluer-bluest eyes, all sparkly and full of trouble. Gone. In their place were two bloody pits covered by bruised and swollen lids.
Willow and Tara came in from the kitchen. Tara turned right around and left again, and I didn't blame her a bit. Willow stood next to me and put her hand on my arm, which helped a little.
Spike quit thrashing and fell back. His face went slack and his mouth fell open.
"Are...I mean...will they...grow back?" I was glad Will had the strength to ask the question, 'cause I sure didn't.
Giles cleared his throat. "My understanding is that they will...regenerate...in much the same way his spine healed after..." His voice trailed off.
"After I dropped the organ on him. It's OK. That's actually a good memory. He deserved it. But he didn't deserve this."
Giles continued. "But it will take time, particularly if the optic nerve was damaged."
I held Spike against the cushions until Giles was finished cleaning and re-bandaging the wounds. When he turned his attentions to the injuries below Spike's waist, I decided I'd had enough for a few minutes. I went into the kitchen and sat at the table with Dawn.
"How bad?" She looked scared and I could hear big fear in her voice.
"Bad. But Giles says it'll heal."
"Who did it?"
"I don't know. We'll have to ask him when he-" Willow let out a little shriek and I was out of my chair and in the living room in under two seconds.
They were doing their best to hold him, but Spike wasn't having it. He was awake. He howled and roared and swore and fought, which actually made me feel a little better. This I could deal with.
Giles had removed the bandages from around his hips and abdomen. Every time Spike thrashed against the sofa, fresh blood gushed. I yelled over my shoulder at Dawn, telling her to stay in the kitchen. Then I grabbed him and threw him down. I straddled his chest and pulled his hands up over his head and leaned down to talk right into his ear.
"Spike, it's OK." What a liar. "It's gonna be OK. Just hold still and let us help you-"
He stilled suddenly. "Slayer?" His voice was a rumble, but at least it was him. I was afraid the demon wouldn't let go long enough to let him hear me.
"Why can't I see? It hurts, Slayer. My eyes...and my...my belly..." His voice became more human with every word he said, and all of a sudden, that was worse. All of a sudden, there were tears in my eyes.
"Shhh...it's all right. You...you were hurt. But we're gonna clean you up and stop the bleeding. You're gonna be OK." I was almost crooning it to him.
"How bad?" Big fear, just like Dawn. And I knew if I didn't answer right away...
"How bad, Slayer?" His voice had changed again, gotten growly and insistent.
"Pretty bad."
The tension drained out of him and his head fell back. I let go of his wrists and he brought his hands down to rest against me.
"Why am I tied up?"
"We were afraid you might...you know...hurt yourself or-"
"Somebody else?" Just a little flicker of a smile. I reached up and touched his cheek below the bandages. Don't know why. Just felt like the right thing to do.
"Giles is going to finish cleaning and bandaging your...lower half, and then I'll untie you."
He nodded and licked his lower lip. I actually had to fight the urge to kiss him then, as if there wasn't enough wiggins-worthy stuff happening for one night.
Giles had gone back to work on him and I felt him tense up again. I reached out and held on tight to his upper arms to keep him still. It must have hurt big-time, but he never said so.
When Giles was done I climbed off and untied him. Willow had found a blanket somewhere and covered him to his waist. I went into the kitchen and found Dawn.
Her head was resting on her arms and she was almost asleep, but when I told her she could see Spike, she was out of the chair like a shot.
"Niblet? That you?" I heard him greet her. I heard her start to cry. Seemed like a good idea, so I sat down in the chair she'd just vacated and bawled my brains out for about five minutes.
When I finally pulled it together, Tara was sitting across from me. She held out her hand and I took it. She didn't say anything, which was cool. Tara gets it.
Giles came in and sat with us. He took off his glasses and rubbed his eyes. "He seems to be holding up well enough. Better than I would have expected, in fact."
"Did you...did you tell him?"
"He was rather insistent about it. Threatened to shove the bandages...well, at any rate, yes, I told him about his eyes and his...other injuries. I couldn't give him a prognosis about any of it. As I said before, it will depend on the extent of the nerve damage."
"He should have blood, shouldn't he?" It was the first time Tara had spoken since we left the crypt. "I mean, won't that help him heal?"
"Oh, god...I never even thought of that...and it's so late. Where are we going to get blood tonight?"
We looked at one another. I stood up and walked over to the silverware drawer and took out a paring knife. Then I grabbed a mug out of the cupboard. Willow came into the room just as I sliced into my wrist.
"Dawn's asleep on the floor in there and...OH!" Her eyes were round, but just for a second. Then she was rolling up her sleeve.
We took turns, and between the four of us, it was enough to fill the mug.
"I'll stop by Willy's tomorrow and buy a few pints. He should have the good stuff for a few days 'til he's stronger."
Giles finished bandaging us, and then I bandaged him. It was a big night for white gauze on Revello Drive.
He didn't say much when I brought him the mug. Just turned his sightless face toward us with a strange little smile. "Ta, mates. 'Preciate it."
Giles left then, and Willow and Tara helped me drag Dawn up to bed. Then it was just the two of us, with about three hours left until sunrise. I sat down on the floor next to the sofa and stared up at him.
"Whatcha gapin' at, pet?" I started to say that I wasn't, but he stopped me. "I can feel your eyes on me, Slayer. 'S'OK. Look all you like." He turned his face toward the window and I saw his hand tighten around the mug.
"Spike."
"Mmm?"
"Tell me."
"Tell you what, luv?" He was trying to sound innocent and casual. I wasn't buying it.
"Tell me who did this to you."
He was quiet for a long time. I didn't push him. I had this feeling-call it Slayer's intuition-that if I pressed him, he'd clam up and never tell. So I waited.
Finally, he turned his face toward me and in a voice that I would have bet my life I'd never hear from the Big Bad-a voice so broken and full of misery and hurt and betrayal-he said it.
"Drusilla."
I couldn't answer right away. Looking back, of course, it made perfect sense. But at that moment, I had a hard time wrapping my mind around it.
And then I saw that blood had begun to seep from under the bandages over his eyes. He was crying and there were no tear ducts, so he was bleeding instead.
I crawled up next to him and wrapped my arms around his head and held him there. He never made another sound. I held him until it was time to close the drapes to block the sunlight. Then I lay down on the floor next to the sofa and we slept.
tbc
Author: VicNoir
Rating: R
Disclaimers: It all belongs to Mutant Enemy.
Summary: An alternative season 6 and 7.
By the time we got him back to the house, he was twitching quite a bit. Looked like jolts of electricity were going through him, and every once in a while he let out a little snarl.
"Buffy, it is absolutely unacceptable that he stay in your home. I appreciate that you feel compassion for him, but there is no reason to put yourself or Dawn in danger." We were sitting in the driveway, and Giles was trying to convince me one last time.
"Spike would never hurt Dawn."
"And you?"
I was less sure about that. I knew that he thought he loved me. I knew he'd tried to prove it more than once. But I also knew that I tended to bring out the worst in him, and... My train of thought was interrupted by another, louder snarl, followed by a really pathetic moan.
"It'll be OK. Besides, what're we supposed to do with him? It's not like we can just drop him off at the ER."
"He could stay with me. He has in the past. When the Initiative-"
"This is different. This isn't some stupid chip that gives him headaches. This is...he's going to need..." I stopped, because I realized that I didn't have a clue what he was going to need. But I was pretty sure that Giles-much as I love him-wouldn't be able to give it to him.
"Are you sure?" He looked so worried. Like this might really be a problem, after my mom dropping dead on me, and a hell-god after my sister, and the world almost ending again, and death, and resurrection.
"Yes. And besides, it'll make Dawn feel all grown up if I let her take care of him." Spike stiffened in the seat. I watched as his fangs appeared and he growled and groaned and kicked at the floor of the car. I looked at Giles. "Well, maybe not right away."
His body stilled and the fangs went away. We took advantage of the moment and got him into the house just as Willow and Tara drove up.
We put him on the sofa.
"Buffy..."
"I know, Giles. Will, could you go get a piece of clothesline out of the basement?" I hated to do it, but I knew I had to. We tied his hands together and then his feet.
Giles removed the bandages from his eyes and started to clean him up. Right about then, Dawn came downstairs. I met her in the hall and blocked her view of the living room.
"What's going on?" She tried to look past me.
"Spike had...an accident. He's hurt. It's bad." She tried to push past me and I caught her by the arms.
"Let Giles finish cleaning him up, then you can see him, OK?" There must have been something in the way I said it that made her stop and look at me again. Then Spike let out the loudest, nastiest snarl yet.
"Buffy!" Giles sounded like he was having trouble.
I spun Dawn around and gave her a push toward the kitchen. Then I went into the living room, but I had to force myself to do it.
Spike was thrashing on the sofa, and Giles was doing his best to hold him down and failing fast. I grabbed Spike's shoulders and pushed him back on the cushions, getting a really good look at his face.
They were gone.
Those blue-bluer-bluest eyes, all sparkly and full of trouble. Gone. In their place were two bloody pits covered by bruised and swollen lids.
Willow and Tara came in from the kitchen. Tara turned right around and left again, and I didn't blame her a bit. Willow stood next to me and put her hand on my arm, which helped a little.
Spike quit thrashing and fell back. His face went slack and his mouth fell open.
"Are...I mean...will they...grow back?" I was glad Will had the strength to ask the question, 'cause I sure didn't.
Giles cleared his throat. "My understanding is that they will...regenerate...in much the same way his spine healed after..." His voice trailed off.
"After I dropped the organ on him. It's OK. That's actually a good memory. He deserved it. But he didn't deserve this."
Giles continued. "But it will take time, particularly if the optic nerve was damaged."
I held Spike against the cushions until Giles was finished cleaning and re-bandaging the wounds. When he turned his attentions to the injuries below Spike's waist, I decided I'd had enough for a few minutes. I went into the kitchen and sat at the table with Dawn.
"How bad?" She looked scared and I could hear big fear in her voice.
"Bad. But Giles says it'll heal."
"Who did it?"
"I don't know. We'll have to ask him when he-" Willow let out a little shriek and I was out of my chair and in the living room in under two seconds.
They were doing their best to hold him, but Spike wasn't having it. He was awake. He howled and roared and swore and fought, which actually made me feel a little better. This I could deal with.
Giles had removed the bandages from around his hips and abdomen. Every time Spike thrashed against the sofa, fresh blood gushed. I yelled over my shoulder at Dawn, telling her to stay in the kitchen. Then I grabbed him and threw him down. I straddled his chest and pulled his hands up over his head and leaned down to talk right into his ear.
"Spike, it's OK." What a liar. "It's gonna be OK. Just hold still and let us help you-"
He stilled suddenly. "Slayer?" His voice was a rumble, but at least it was him. I was afraid the demon wouldn't let go long enough to let him hear me.
"Why can't I see? It hurts, Slayer. My eyes...and my...my belly..." His voice became more human with every word he said, and all of a sudden, that was worse. All of a sudden, there were tears in my eyes.
"Shhh...it's all right. You...you were hurt. But we're gonna clean you up and stop the bleeding. You're gonna be OK." I was almost crooning it to him.
"How bad?" Big fear, just like Dawn. And I knew if I didn't answer right away...
"How bad, Slayer?" His voice had changed again, gotten growly and insistent.
"Pretty bad."
The tension drained out of him and his head fell back. I let go of his wrists and he brought his hands down to rest against me.
"Why am I tied up?"
"We were afraid you might...you know...hurt yourself or-"
"Somebody else?" Just a little flicker of a smile. I reached up and touched his cheek below the bandages. Don't know why. Just felt like the right thing to do.
"Giles is going to finish cleaning and bandaging your...lower half, and then I'll untie you."
He nodded and licked his lower lip. I actually had to fight the urge to kiss him then, as if there wasn't enough wiggins-worthy stuff happening for one night.
Giles had gone back to work on him and I felt him tense up again. I reached out and held on tight to his upper arms to keep him still. It must have hurt big-time, but he never said so.
When Giles was done I climbed off and untied him. Willow had found a blanket somewhere and covered him to his waist. I went into the kitchen and found Dawn.
Her head was resting on her arms and she was almost asleep, but when I told her she could see Spike, she was out of the chair like a shot.
"Niblet? That you?" I heard him greet her. I heard her start to cry. Seemed like a good idea, so I sat down in the chair she'd just vacated and bawled my brains out for about five minutes.
When I finally pulled it together, Tara was sitting across from me. She held out her hand and I took it. She didn't say anything, which was cool. Tara gets it.
Giles came in and sat with us. He took off his glasses and rubbed his eyes. "He seems to be holding up well enough. Better than I would have expected, in fact."
"Did you...did you tell him?"
"He was rather insistent about it. Threatened to shove the bandages...well, at any rate, yes, I told him about his eyes and his...other injuries. I couldn't give him a prognosis about any of it. As I said before, it will depend on the extent of the nerve damage."
"He should have blood, shouldn't he?" It was the first time Tara had spoken since we left the crypt. "I mean, won't that help him heal?"
"Oh, god...I never even thought of that...and it's so late. Where are we going to get blood tonight?"
We looked at one another. I stood up and walked over to the silverware drawer and took out a paring knife. Then I grabbed a mug out of the cupboard. Willow came into the room just as I sliced into my wrist.
"Dawn's asleep on the floor in there and...OH!" Her eyes were round, but just for a second. Then she was rolling up her sleeve.
We took turns, and between the four of us, it was enough to fill the mug.
"I'll stop by Willy's tomorrow and buy a few pints. He should have the good stuff for a few days 'til he's stronger."
Giles finished bandaging us, and then I bandaged him. It was a big night for white gauze on Revello Drive.
He didn't say much when I brought him the mug. Just turned his sightless face toward us with a strange little smile. "Ta, mates. 'Preciate it."
Giles left then, and Willow and Tara helped me drag Dawn up to bed. Then it was just the two of us, with about three hours left until sunrise. I sat down on the floor next to the sofa and stared up at him.
"Whatcha gapin' at, pet?" I started to say that I wasn't, but he stopped me. "I can feel your eyes on me, Slayer. 'S'OK. Look all you like." He turned his face toward the window and I saw his hand tighten around the mug.
"Spike."
"Mmm?"
"Tell me."
"Tell you what, luv?" He was trying to sound innocent and casual. I wasn't buying it.
"Tell me who did this to you."
He was quiet for a long time. I didn't push him. I had this feeling-call it Slayer's intuition-that if I pressed him, he'd clam up and never tell. So I waited.
Finally, he turned his face toward me and in a voice that I would have bet my life I'd never hear from the Big Bad-a voice so broken and full of misery and hurt and betrayal-he said it.
"Drusilla."
I couldn't answer right away. Looking back, of course, it made perfect sense. But at that moment, I had a hard time wrapping my mind around it.
And then I saw that blood had begun to seep from under the bandages over his eyes. He was crying and there were no tear ducts, so he was bleeding instead.
I crawled up next to him and wrapped my arms around his head and held him there. He never made another sound. I held him until it was time to close the drapes to block the sunlight. Then I lay down on the floor next to the sofa and we slept.
tbc