Author's note: writer's block sucks.

Chapter 7: Wishes Never to Be

When Gandalf and Treebeard returned to the fort, they saw Legolas still on the bed but he was sitting up. He held a bowl of strawberries in his lap and another bowl lay on the floor beside the bed. The others were sitting around the bed though Gimli and the hobbits were away a considerable amount of space from both Aragorn and Legolas. The Man and Elf both looked indignant and their faces were a bright red, whether from embarrassment or anger, Gandalf and Treebeard could not tell. Upon coming closer, they could tell the Man and Elf weren't angry but annoyed. Gandalf raised an eyebrow at the sight and he strode up to Aragorn and Legolas.

"Legolas, are you feeling well?" he barked. Legolas nodded offhandedly as he absentmindedly played around with the ripe strawberries in his bowl. Gandalf looked at the other bowl and saw that it contained fresh cream. "Have Merry and Pippin brought you strawberries as a meal?" He looked sharply at the hobbits when they sniggered. "What is so amusing?"

"Nothing, Gandalf," Merry choked out. He beamed goofily at the wizard. Gandalf huffed and turned back to Legolas and Aragorn who, to his surprise, were turning redder (more red?) by the moment.

"And what is wrong with you two?"

Aragorn shook his head vigorously. "Nothing, Gandalf. What is happening?"

"We shall ride to King Theoden tomorrow," Gandalf replied. "We shall ask for his alliance against our war with Sauron and Saruman and the Ents will go to Isenguard. They have long been mistreated by Saruman and finally seek revenge."

"Tomorrow is to be a long day," Treebeard said droningly. "You must rest well tonight. My home has sufficient quarters for all of you though you will be paired together as the Halflings will tell you. Would you mind?"

Aragorn shook his head. "No, that is fine. Thank you, Master Treebeard."

"Hoom, no thanks is needed. We are all in an alliance with one another. Rest, my masters and I shall see you off when the sun rises in the morning." Treebeard slowly made his way out and left only the Fellowship.

"Good then," Gandalf began, straightening out his robes, "Merry and Pippin already have their room and Aragorn shall-"

"…sleep with Legolas!" Merry and Pippin shouted in unison.

Gandalf raised his eyebrow. "I was thinking more that Legolas would share a room with Gimli."

"Me? Sleep with the Elf?" Gimli snorted but a twinkle was in his eye. "Gandalf, I refuse to share a room alone with the Elf."

"And Aragorn is a Healer!" Pippin said excitedly. "He can help Legolas in case Legolas gets sick!"

"That's right!" Merry agreed. "You've always said yourself that a King has the Hands of a Healer, Gandalf."

"Aragorn is not a King yet, you fools." Gandalf growled. He sighed heavily. "But I suppose your argument has good judgment in itself. Indeed, Aragorn can aid Legolas should he feel any after-effects of his run-in with the Nazgul. Come Gimli, you shall share a room with me." Gandalf left quickly and Gimli followed him. Both Aragorn and Legolas did not see the wink that was exchanged between the hobbits and Gimli as the Dwarf exited.

"Well then," Merry said grandly as he hopped down from his chair, "Pippin and I shall lead you to your room!" He led the way down a small hall of tree boughs and into a small tree that had been hollowed out. The inside was empty except for two miniature beds off to the side. "Good night, Strider and Legolas!" Cackling wildly, Merry and Pippin skipped down the hall, leaving both Aragorn and Legolas alone. A long silence ensued as the two males sat on their respective beds, both uncomfortable with each other's presence.

"We should rest," Aragorn said finally. "Should you feel any discomfort, do not hesitate to wake me, Legolas." He lied down on his bed and from the faint rustlings coming from his side, he could tell Legolas was doing the same. He lied there; unable to sleep when his love was there so close beside him. He only prayed that Legolas could not hear the heavy thudding of his heart. He knew Legolas was not resting either. "Legolas."

"Yes?"

Aragorn smiled upon hearing the musical voice. "What do you think about on the long nights?"

A long pause followed. "What do you mean?"

"You seem carefree on the outside but I know you have heavy thoughts on your mind. Tell me what worries you."

"The same things that worry you worry me also, Aragorn."

But you know not what my worries are, Aragorn thought sorrowfully to himself. You know not how much I yearn to show my love for you. You do not worry about betraying your supposed lover because you love her no longer. You do not worry that your feelings may prove to destroy a good friendship. You do not worry that someday you may never see your love ever again… that he may never know how you truly feel about him…

"Aragorn, when this quest is over, where do you see us all?"

I see you with me….standing in my arms, both of us refusing to let the other go… "I see us all as we always have been."

Legolas shifted as he turned onto his side to look at Aragorn as they talked. "But there will be changes to our lifestyles. You shall become King of Gondor, most certainly."

"Perhaps…"

"And…you will wed Arwen."

Oh, how that name was a stab at the heart. All feeling of guilt returned to Aragorn's heart as he thought of the beautiful Elf who awaited his return in Rivendell. The same Elf who had chosen to give up her Immortality for him. The same Elf he was supposed to love…

"Yes…I will wed Arwen…" Aragorn's voice trailed off. He would wed Arwen though he did not love her. How could he do that to both himself and Arwen? Surely it was not right… Surely there was some law of the heart that prevented such a marriage… Surely there could be some way he could tell Legolas of where his love truly lay and they could face no consequences… Aragorn gritted his teeth in frustration. "Sleep, Legolas. I wish not to ponder on such thoughts at the moment."

He never wished to ever ponder on such thoughts. He wished he would never have to ponder on such thoughts. He wished…he wished…. He wished for too many things he would never get…

"Sleep, Legolas. I wish not to ponder on such thoughts at the moment."

Why, Aragorn? Legolas thought to himself. Because thoughts of his beautiful Arwen hurt his heart. Because thinking of Arwen would only bring Aragorn to grieve that they were so many leagues away from one another. Because thinking of Arwen would only make Aragorn realize he was not by her side now.

You do not wish to ponder on these thoughts, Aragorn, but I ponder them everyday. I think about the realization that every day that passes means one less day I get to spend with you. Not a day passes that I think of Arwen and jealousy overrides my senses. Not a day passes that I do not wish for you to hold me in your arms. Not a day passes that I long for your touch. Not a day passes that I long for you to tell me you love me.

Not a day passes that I wish I could die rather than live to suffer in grief.