Alright, the first chapter was a tester, here continues...sorry so short, but more 2 come, and I can't think of anything but I figured you deserve something...I also apologize if the numbers are a bit off, I had to backtrack a little...
Disclaimer: Only the unnamed poor souls, approx. 406,997,891, are mine. The nine original Fellowship members belong to Tolkien.
~Forgot to mention: When they're hiding from the evil crow thingys, one person impodes himself upon some thorn or another in the neck or head, I forget which. Also 72 people are carried off by the Crebian thingamagigs.Total:406,997,827~
In the darkness of Moria, (A/N: this is too much) two can't see very well in the dark, wander off and are killed by goblins. Twenty got lost when the Fellowship stopped at the three doorways. No one knows what happened to them. When the troll comes in, about 700 are eaten. The troll explodes from eating too much. Total: 406,997,105 Fellowship members and one troll
When the stairs crumble, 257 fall off. 63 more are shot with the goblin/orc arrows and misc. other weapons. At the bridge of Khazad-Dum, 4,502 fall off (it's a thin bridge, you know). The Balrog's flames singe 24 near by, knocks off 890 others. When Gandalf falls, he ~dies~, but he doesn't count. I won't spoil it (if I already haven't) for those of you who haven't read the books. Now go read them. Total: 406,991,369
On the way out, 85 people just can't take the pressure and jump off. The whole crowd of people prevents Frodo from seeing what happened, so he doesn't know about Gandalf yet. Poor little hobbit. 7 elves who knew some dead person well die of a broken heart. Peter Jackson fires some crewperson for being an idiot, letting the cast die, and not bringing the right flavored donuts. Geez, if he keeps this up, it'll only be himself, a camera, and Nine Fellowship members! Shame on that, could you imagine only 9 heroes? It would be easier to keep track of, though. Anyway, 94 men and one pathetic dwarf die of fright upon entering Lothlorien. 80 die from moving too much and either impoding themselves on arrows or being shot purposely by them. Total:406,991,102
One spying hobbit, on seeing Galadriel in her freaky "In place of a dark lord you shall have a queen, blah blah blah" mode, dies of fright. The forest is too small and 1,140 people decide to go find someplace else to sleep. Various things happen to them...like do the words orcs, waterfalls, orcs, trolls, orcs, goblins, ringwraiths and orcs mean anything to you?
Total:406,989,961
The elves of Lorien don't have enough boats, so 4,809,024 have to swim. Unfortunately, only eight took swimming classes. No one notices the others drowning. Total: 402,180,945
180,945 people are not paying attention, and they all fall off the waterfall. So sad. Head count! Wait...I can't count that high. Because there are too many people, of course Boromir slips away unnoticed, but is unable to find Frodo. And again, because of the crowd of people, no one notices six fangirls slipping in. Boromir gets killed by the orcs long before the rest of the Fellowship even smells the foulness. The ending of this ends kinda like the movie...Merry & Pippin's fangirls hoist them over their shoulders and make the grand escape to their honeymoon through the forest. Frodo and Sam leave in the boats to get away from the fangirls, who unfortunately for them know how to swim. Legolas and Aragorn run off to "hunt some orc", but are really running away from the rabid fangirl shrieks. Gimli has no fangirl, probably because he's stingy, mean, smelly, short, and otherwise unimportant, but he decides it would be fun the listen to Strider shriek like a girl, so he follows. And the remaining 401,999,992 people who are not given names are killed off by the orcs, who think that somewhere amonst them are four halflings. Silly orcs. Go see a dentist, and a doctor, and a dermatologist, and a phyciatrist, and a person who knows how to spell phyciatrist, and... Total: 7 Fellowship members and 6 rabid fangirls. I end up rendering Legolas' fangirl unconcious so I can chase after him, and I'm followed by three of my friends and my best buddy, because we all have a crush on Legolas. Just great.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
So, how was it? In case you are wondering, of course I will continue. And, because this is my story and I'm the almighty author, of course I get Legolas. AND he loves me back. *sticks tongue out at three other friends, and gives sincere *cough* apology to my best buddy, ELML, BBBITWWW, Perieri, Rayne Maker!* Romans! WHAT?! Something! WHAT?! 19-6! Or something like that. Holla, holla, holla back sista! Sorry, cha, little inside joke. PS: The following belong to me because I made them up: the sayings "cha"(duh), "ELML", and "BBBITWWW", also "Perieri" and "Holla, holla, holla back sista!". The only person authorized to use these, besides me, is Rayne Maker. Love to all!
Disclaimer: Only the unnamed poor souls, approx. 406,997,891, are mine. The nine original Fellowship members belong to Tolkien.
~Forgot to mention: When they're hiding from the evil crow thingys, one person impodes himself upon some thorn or another in the neck or head, I forget which. Also 72 people are carried off by the Crebian thingamagigs.Total:406,997,827~
In the darkness of Moria, (A/N: this is too much) two can't see very well in the dark, wander off and are killed by goblins. Twenty got lost when the Fellowship stopped at the three doorways. No one knows what happened to them. When the troll comes in, about 700 are eaten. The troll explodes from eating too much. Total: 406,997,105 Fellowship members and one troll
When the stairs crumble, 257 fall off. 63 more are shot with the goblin/orc arrows and misc. other weapons. At the bridge of Khazad-Dum, 4,502 fall off (it's a thin bridge, you know). The Balrog's flames singe 24 near by, knocks off 890 others. When Gandalf falls, he ~dies~, but he doesn't count. I won't spoil it (if I already haven't) for those of you who haven't read the books. Now go read them. Total: 406,991,369
On the way out, 85 people just can't take the pressure and jump off. The whole crowd of people prevents Frodo from seeing what happened, so he doesn't know about Gandalf yet. Poor little hobbit. 7 elves who knew some dead person well die of a broken heart. Peter Jackson fires some crewperson for being an idiot, letting the cast die, and not bringing the right flavored donuts. Geez, if he keeps this up, it'll only be himself, a camera, and Nine Fellowship members! Shame on that, could you imagine only 9 heroes? It would be easier to keep track of, though. Anyway, 94 men and one pathetic dwarf die of fright upon entering Lothlorien. 80 die from moving too much and either impoding themselves on arrows or being shot purposely by them. Total:406,991,102
One spying hobbit, on seeing Galadriel in her freaky "In place of a dark lord you shall have a queen, blah blah blah" mode, dies of fright. The forest is too small and 1,140 people decide to go find someplace else to sleep. Various things happen to them...like do the words orcs, waterfalls, orcs, trolls, orcs, goblins, ringwraiths and orcs mean anything to you?
Total:406,989,961
The elves of Lorien don't have enough boats, so 4,809,024 have to swim. Unfortunately, only eight took swimming classes. No one notices the others drowning. Total: 402,180,945
180,945 people are not paying attention, and they all fall off the waterfall. So sad. Head count! Wait...I can't count that high. Because there are too many people, of course Boromir slips away unnoticed, but is unable to find Frodo. And again, because of the crowd of people, no one notices six fangirls slipping in. Boromir gets killed by the orcs long before the rest of the Fellowship even smells the foulness. The ending of this ends kinda like the movie...Merry & Pippin's fangirls hoist them over their shoulders and make the grand escape to their honeymoon through the forest. Frodo and Sam leave in the boats to get away from the fangirls, who unfortunately for them know how to swim. Legolas and Aragorn run off to "hunt some orc", but are really running away from the rabid fangirl shrieks. Gimli has no fangirl, probably because he's stingy, mean, smelly, short, and otherwise unimportant, but he decides it would be fun the listen to Strider shriek like a girl, so he follows. And the remaining 401,999,992 people who are not given names are killed off by the orcs, who think that somewhere amonst them are four halflings. Silly orcs. Go see a dentist, and a doctor, and a dermatologist, and a phyciatrist, and a person who knows how to spell phyciatrist, and... Total: 7 Fellowship members and 6 rabid fangirls. I end up rendering Legolas' fangirl unconcious so I can chase after him, and I'm followed by three of my friends and my best buddy, because we all have a crush on Legolas. Just great.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
So, how was it? In case you are wondering, of course I will continue. And, because this is my story and I'm the almighty author, of course I get Legolas. AND he loves me back. *sticks tongue out at three other friends, and gives sincere *cough* apology to my best buddy, ELML, BBBITWWW, Perieri, Rayne Maker!* Romans! WHAT?! Something! WHAT?! 19-6! Or something like that. Holla, holla, holla back sista! Sorry, cha, little inside joke. PS: The following belong to me because I made them up: the sayings "cha"(duh), "ELML", and "BBBITWWW", also "Perieri" and "Holla, holla, holla back sista!". The only person authorized to use these, besides me, is Rayne Maker. Love to all!