Disclaimer: Anything you recognize belongs to the goddess, JKR. Many thanks to Tessie for beta-reading this chapter. This particular chapter is dedicated to Jesse who is turning 18 (Happy Birthday!)

Chapter Eight: Return from the Brink

The scene in front of her was almost too much to take in and Hermione was momentarily paralyzed with terror. All she could see were the streams of blood, dark rivulets of carnelian flowing from the pale skin…the wrists that had been so cruelly slashed by the straight-edge razor lying on the floor nearby.

A wave of nausea washed over her but she quickly recovered and rushed to Remus' side, kneeling down and immediately grabbing his wrists in her hands, trying desperately to staunch the pulsing flow of blood and trying to ignore the stench of death that seemed to fill her nostrils.

"No..." he murmured weakly, trying to pull his hands away and not succeeding.

"I will not let you push me away again, Remus!" Hermione shouted, trying to keep him conscious. She released one hand to grab her wand. "Sonorem Magnum!" she yelled as the wand emitted a thunderous noise, which was sure to attract the attention of the other professors if the first explosion hadn't already. Dropping her wand, she clasped her hand around his wrist again, wishing there were more she could do.

"Why did you do this to yourself?" Hermione asked.

"I…will not…hurt…others," he mumbled, the words difficult to understand as his breathing became more laboured.

"I don't want to lose you!"

"Better…this way…" He was drifting in and out of consciousness and Hermione tensed when she noticed that there was a bluish tinge to his lips….

"Don't say that!" She cried out, tears now streaming down her face. "That isn't true!"

"Remus!" Hermione turned to see Severus and Sirius at the door, both looking shocked at what they were witnessing.

"He's slashed his wrists," she told them in an urgent tone as they quickly joined her. "He's bleeding badly. Get Madame Pomfrey! Hurry!"

"I'll go," Severus offered and rushed out the door.

"I don't know what else to do," Hermione sobbed.

"I know a basic healing spell that should keep the wound closed until Pomfrey gets here," Sirius said, somewhat dazed from seeing his best friend try to commit suicide. "You have to let go of his wrists, Hermione."

She shook her head.

"Hermione, I know what I am doing. Do you think I would ask you to do anything to endanger his life?" Sirius asked urgently.

Reluctantly, Hermione let go of his wrists, dropping her hands in her lap in defeat. The blood immediately began to flow again and Sirius quickly pointed his wand at the wound. "Sanguam Finitem," he said softly. A bright silver light traced over the wound and the bleeding stopped. The wound was still there but it was no longer open.

"I should…I should get blankets," Hermione got up and picked a comforter off Remus' bed and placed it over the gravely injured man. She felt oddly disjointed, as if her body and her spirit were not completely in harmony with one another. Sirius looked at her quizzically but said nothing, getting up to wait by the doorway, looking back at Remus every so often and shaking his head wordlessly.

They did not have to wait long.

Poppy bustled into the room frantically, closely followed by a very anxious-looking Severus. The mediwitch pursed her lips as she quickly assessed the situation.

"Your quick thinking has probably saved him," she said brusquely to Hermione as the older witch pointed her wand at Remus and quickly levitated him over to the bed. "He has lost a great deal of blood. Another minute or so and he would have lost consciousness altogether. Severus. Sirius. I need you to hold his arms and legs steady so that he doesn't inadvertently injure himself further. Be careful as he is very weak."

Sirius moved to place his hands gently on Remus' upper arms. Severus, ashen-faced, placed shaking hands on Remus' knees.

Hermione stood up to stand next to Poppy and watched quietly as the older witch cast several spells on Remus' mangled wrists.

"Aah!" he cried weakly as one spell circled his wrist. Hermione winced at the expression of pain that was contorting his pale face. He did not struggle against the two wizards who were restraining him…he was far too weak for that, it seemed.

"My apologies, Remus," the mediwitch said in a considerably softer tone. "The healing spell can be quite painful. It cannot be helped."

Madame Pomfrey repeated the spell on the other wrist and Remus cried out again, considerably louder this time and struggling weakly against the hands holding him down before collapsing in fatigue.

"You can both release him now," the mediwitch said to Sirius and Severus. She then turned to Remus. "I am going to give you a potion of dreamless sleep, Remus. Your body needs time to heal itself and it desperately wants rest. Drink it all down…it is not much and it will help you immensely." She took a small potion bottle from her belt and, tipping his head gently, poured a small amount of a shimmering blue liquid into his mouth. He swallowed, almost compulsively, and was asleep moments later.

"Sirius, I need you to levitate him over to the infirmary so that I can monitor him over the next twenty four hours. Although I feel he will be all right, there is always a chance that his condition will deteriorate. Werewolves are notoriously poor patients. It is almost as if the animal tries to reject anything that might heal the human," Poppy looked at Remus and shook her head softly. "He, out of all my students, would have made a brilliant mediwizard. Old prejudices die hard…a pity, though…"

Sirius took out his wand and quickly levitated his sleeping friend. He led him out of the room.

Madame Pomfrey looked at the doorway for a moment, as if pondering something deeply. She then turned to Severus.

"I will certainly need more of that potion, Severus. Bring it down to the infirmary as soon as it is ready," the mediwitch hurried out of the room.

"Hermione?" Severus walked over to where she was still standing.

She felt as if something had taken away her ability to talk. She looked at him with dry, aching eyes and an ache in her heart that was so much worse.

"Are you all right?" Severus asked, concern in his eyes as he took in how pale she was and the fact that she was trembling slightly.

"I…don't…I…" she was about to wipe her forehead with her hand when she noticed something. Her hands and her robes were covered in blood…his blood.

"Bleeding," she whispered as the room suddenly spun crazily out of control. She was dimly aware of falling, of someone catching her before the blackness consumed her entirely.

***************later in the infirmary******************

She wasn't sure when she first noticed them, those flickers of soft, silver light that pierced through the pitch-black nothingness around her. They moved around her, gently bathing her in a comforting glow that eventually became brighter and brighter.

And then, she heard noises…mumblings…like someone talking underwater which, for some reason, seemed very amusing…she almost wanted to laugh…almost…

"She should regain consciousness shortly."

"She went into shock when she saw her hands."

"You did the right thing to bring her here. The poor thing has had a most frightful year."

"Will she be all right?"

"There is no reason why she should not be. She is a strong person and has been through other rather awful incidents. Dementors. Basilisks. Lucius Malfoy. She will be fine. Have you finished the blood restorative potion?"

"Yes. It can be given to Remus as soon as it is cooled."

"Thank you. Your help is always appreciated."

"You will tell me when they awaken?"

"Of course, you overgrown bat. Now, off with you!"

Hermione did not want the overgrown bat to leave but she was far too comfortable in the semi-darkness to really worry all that much. She felt a hand touch her forehead gently.

"Rest, Hermione. I will be back in the evening."

The sound of receding footsteps made Hermione feel somewhat lonely. She then noticed that the darkness was intensifying and she soon knew no more.

*****later***********

It was the chirping of the crickets that brought her back…one of the most gentle, welcoming sounds she had heard in a long time. She could feel the smile on her face as she listened quietly for several moments before attempting to open her eyes.

Her vision was fuzzy at first but quickly came into focus. She was in the infirmary…that much was certain…and Madame Pomfrey was watching her with a compassionate smile on her face.

"I'm glad to see you awake dear. You were unconscious a touch longer than I would have expected," the mediwitch sat down on the chair next to her.

Hermione looked down and saw that her hands were clean and she was dressed in a clean white hospital robe. For some reason, this surprised her somewhat.

"A thorough cleaning spell," Madame Pomfrey replied to the unasked question in Hermione's eyes.

Hermione nodded, fighting down the twinge of panic in the pit of her stomach. The memory of what had happened was far too vivid…

"I have something for that as well," the older witch held out a small vial, which contained a murky turquoise liquid. "It is a mild sedative."

Hermione shook her head. "I do not want to blur my senses. I still have classes to teach."

Poppy raised her eyebrows in amusement. "Now, that sounds like the Hermione Granger I know," she said approvingly.

"How long have I been…asleep?"

"Since late last night…about twenty hours or so. Are you hungry?"

"Famished actually," Hermione stomach grumbled in agreement but her gaze turned serious. "What about Remus? Is he all right?"

Poppy's eyes grew wistful and sad and, for a moment, Hermione thought she was going to faint again.

"He can't be dead," she thought nervously.

"Remus will be fine but a suicide attempt like this…frightens me. If he is capable of such violence against himself…I fear he may try again," Poppy looked to one side. Following her gaze, Hermione saw Remus, sleeping cocooned in his blankets several beds down.

"The scars. Will he have the scars?" Hermione asked, not tearing her eyes away from the sleeping figure.

"No. Even with a cut as deep as that…I was able to mend the skin flawlessly."

"Thank goodness he is not left with a permanent reminder of what he attempted to do," Hermione thought gratefully.

"I feel so stupid," Hermione remarked bitterly. "I should not have fainted…that was very weak."

"There is no reason to feel stupid, Hermione," the mediwitch remonstrated. "Your quick thinking saved that man over there. Once the immediate crisis was over, your body shut down. That is how your body protects itself…it automatically knows how much stress it can take. If you go over your limit, you shut down until you are able to cope."

"I still feel that I could have done more," Hermione mumbled bitterly.

The mediwitch smiled. "I can tell that you are feeling better and that will make the others very happy."

"When will he wake up?"

"Shortly," Poppy got up and, waving her wand authoritatively, summoned a parchment and quill, scribbling a few notes quickly before sending both back to her desk. "I expect him to wake up in an hour or so."

"May I stay until he does?"

Poppy smiled at Hermione. "You are not going anywhere yourself, young lady, until tomorrow morning. I am going to ask the house elves to bring you something to eat. I have a meeting with the Headmaster shortly so I will away from the infirmary for a bit. However, I have asked Severus to keep an eye on things while I am out. The overgrown bat can be insufferable sometimes but even he has his uses, I freely admit."

Hermione smiled as the mediwitch bustled away.

"I am hungry," she thought to herself as her stomach rumbled in protest. Almost instantly, a house elf appeared with a tray full of sandwiches and freshly cut fruit along with a goblet of chilled pumpkin juice. After thanking the elf for bringing the food, Hermione devoured everything on the tray, feeling somewhat guilty as she glanced at Remus now and again. When she finished, she placed the tray on the adjacent table and sat there, drumming her fingers nervously…not able to even look at the issue of "The Daily Prophet" that someone had left for her. Finally, she could take it no longer.

"Remus," she whispered and scrambled out of her bed as quickly as possible. Steadying herself for a moment against the wave of dizziness she managed to reach him. Sitting down on the bed quickly, she looked at him with a pang in her heart. He was still pale but not quite as pale as he had been earlier. His wrists were bandaged. His countenance looked calm and she watched the gentle rise and fall of his chest with a bit of relief.

Nervously, she reached out to touch his cheek with her hand. His skin was warm, slightly rough from the facial hair that had not been shaved in many hours.

"If I had only known…" she thought and then the tears, which had been threatening to spill since she had regained consciousness, streamed down her cheeks. She loved him and she wasn't able to prevent him from doing this to himself. Sobbing, she rested her head on his chest and held him to her…frightened that he might somehow get away. The sound of his steady heartbeat did nothing to reassure her.

A gentle touch on her shoulder startled her and she looked up to see Severus looking at her kindly.

"Are you all right, Hermione? You don't look at all well," he clearly was not used to offering comfort although he did hold out a handkerchief for her use, which she gratefully took.

"I should have known he would try something like this. I should have been able to prevent this…"

"Hermione, you cannot blame yourself. This was an act of desperation…rash…unplanned. Remus himself did not know he was going to do it, so how could you?" Severus' voice was stern but kind. "You saved his life, Hermione. If it were not for you, he would be dead."

"I don't…I don't understand why…"

Severus sighed and sat down on the bed next to her. "It is not possible for you to understand this because you are not Remus. The only piece of advice I can possibly give you is to listen to him when he awakes and do not judge him. He will need our support over the next few days. He will especially need you. You know that he loves you."

Hermione turned to Severus with a rueful smile. "If he loves me so much, why did he do this?"

Severus frowned slightly, as if in thought. "On matters of the heart, I am sadly lacking in practical experience. However, my guess is that his primary motivation was a refusal to cause you harm."

"I suppose," Hermione sighed as she touched Remus' cheek again. "I just wish…"

"We all wish, Hermione," Severus said in a soft voice that caught Hermione completely by surprise. Turning to look at him, she saw that his gaze was focussed on a point somewhere outside the window. "We all wish and we all hope but it is only when we take action that we can be assured our wishes and hope will come true. Your actions will determine the outcome, Hermione. Yours is the power, so to speak."

Hermione nodded and suddenly enfolded him in a warm embrace. Severus, quite startled, awkwardly patted her back.

"Thank you for being my friend," she whispered.

"Thank you for being the same," he returned as he let her go. "I am going to go into Poppy's office to look over a few things. Let me know when Remus awakens…I'm sure you will want to watch over him."

Hermione smiled at him and nodded. Severus, with a good-natured smirk and a barely audible comment about Gryffindors, got up and walked over to the office, closing the door.

"My actions," she murmured to herself.

He looked so innocent in sleep that it made her smile to look at him. In sleep, the cares and worries of his life were eased away, the fine lines around his eyes smoothed. On impulse, she leaned down and, closing her eyes, kissed his lips gently…marveling at a softness she could only just remember. She felt someone's hand gently touch her waist. Opening her eyes and pulling away slightly, she smiled to see him looking at her with so much emotion that she thought her heart would break…and then…a memory…

…those eyes…yes, she had seen them before…

And then, she knew…

"It was you," she breathed as her fingers traced his lips shyly. "You saved me that night."

He nodded silently, his eyes never leaving hers.

"Why didn't you tell me, Remus?"

He looked down for a moment, as if to think about his answer carefully. He sighed deeply and then, tentatively, brushed away several strands of hair from her face.

"I did not want you to feel that you were obligated to me."

"You should have known I would never…"

"I realize that now. I was afraid and confused. Afraid that I had almost lost you. Confused because of what that…thing…looked like and what that meant. A succubus only takes on the form of the person dearest to the victim's heart and when I saw…a mirror image of myself…I…no one has ever… I mean…you are so much younger than me…I am but the wreck of a man… why would…"

"You talk entirely too much, Remus" Hermione admonished gently before silencing him by pressing her lips against his. Admitting sweet defeat, Remus kissed her back, his arms circling her waist and holding her closer to him.

Hermione delighted in feeling Remus' kisses but she also knew that he was still very weak so she gently pulled away from him.

"I love you so much, Hermione," he breathed as he touched her face.

"And I love you, Remus," she smiled as she lay down beside him and nestled in his arms.

*********Later***********

Severus stepped out of the office, holding a parchment and quill in his hands as he finished taking notes on an idea for a potion to cure burns. Looking up, he nearly dropped both as he saw Hermione, resting contentedly in Remus' arms. Both were fast asleep and with such peaceful expressions on their faces that he felt a little envious.

"They say that laughter is the best medicine," he mused, nibbling the top of the quill thoughtfully. "I think, however, that love could give it a run for its money."

He gave an indulgent half-smile to the couple and then went back to the infirmary office…to figure out how he was going to get Hermione back into her own bed before Poppy got back.

"Gryffindors," he thought, shaking his head and sighing.