On to the story...
J.R.: Sweet Slobberknocker! I can't believe how loud it is in here!
Lawler: ...No one's cheering!! That fan just gave Triple H the finger, J.R.!!
* King points at the man in the crowd, then J.R. looks over at King, with a confused look on his face *
J.R.: ...Um... King? Are you alright?
* J.R. lays his hand on King's shoulder *
Lawler: ...
* King shoves J.R.'s hand off his shoulder and shudders a little *
Lawler: What the hell are you talking about, J.R.?!? I'm fine! You're the one who's acting like a lunatic, not ME!! And... don't EVER touch me again!
* J.R. rolls his eyes *
J.R.: Yes, yes, King. Whatever you say...
* King let's out a heavy sigh, quietly cursing to himself *
***COMMERCIAL BREAK***
* A advertisment for "Stacker 3 Ultra" pops up on the screen, showing J.R. sitting on the toilet with his pants pulled down, wearing a black cowboy hat *
J.R.: Hello everyone. If you're like me and you have a big, flabby gut, man boobs, and a butt bigger than a goverment mule, you'll instantly fall in love with the all-new product I bring to you today: "Stacker 3 Ultra". It's made with all natural ingredients such as scalled dog, goverment mule, and my favorite: J.R.'s homemade BBQ suace. As god as my witness, "Stacker 3 Ultra" will change your life. It certainly changed mine.
* J.R. pauses for a moment, realizing that he's still fat, then the commercial fades out *
***COMMERCIAL END***
Lawler: ... * snicker *
J.R.: ...Is something wrong, King...?
Lawler: ...Oh, uh, n-nothing's wrong, absolutely nothing... * snicker *
J.R.: ...Look, it's Chris Jericho!!
~*~
Author: It's amazing how J.R. can sense when someone's coming out to the ring, huh? o_O lol
~*~
* Jericho's music plays, he walks out with a mic in his hand, and gets into the ring *
Jericho: Even though I am --
* The crowds begins booing and chanting "has-been" at Jericho, making him slighty angry *
Jericho: As I was saying -- even though I am the first un-disputed champion and I beat The Rock AND Stone Cold Steve Austin IN THE SAME NIGHT -- I am STILL forced to job to men who are centuries older than me, such as those two ass-clowns, Hollywood Hulk Hogan and Ric Flair!
* The arena becomes silent. A few scattered laughs can be heard throughout *
J.R.: ...
Lawler: * screams *
Jericho: So, if you'll excuse me, I have to go job now.
* Jericho drops the mic outside the ring. Seconds later, Hogan's music plays, then he comes slowly walking down the ramp, shaking him arms up and down (in other words, "hulkin' it up"). He tries to enter the ring, but he is too old and weak. So he calls over five or so referee's to help him into the ring *
Lawler: * burst into laughter *
J.R.: ...
* After Hogan's in the ring, the bell rings. Hogan weakly lifts up his left arm to the side of him, shortly after, Jericho runs into it, and falls down. Jericho gets up, then Hogan weakly Irish Whip's him into the ropes. Jericho bounces off the ropes, but quickly stops because it seems Hogan can't lift his own leg up. So, five referee's get into the ring, lifts his right leg up, and holds it in place. Jericho bounces off the ropes again, and his face connects with Hogan's boot. The referee's hop out of the ring, then Hogan slowly bounces off the ropes and tries to give Jericho a leg drop, but falls on his butt instead. The referee's come into the ring AGAIN to help him up. The referee's leave, Hogan thinks to himself for a moment and decides to forgot about the leg drop. Then Hogan slowly drops to one knee, this alone takes him 10 minutes. After 10 mintues, Hogan slowly drop down his other knee, which takes 15 minutes this time. After 15 minutes, Hogan starts profusely sweating and is desperately trying to catch his breath *
Hogan: Hey brother... * huff * ...this is gonna take... * puff * ...me longer then... * huff * ...I thought...
Jericho: Good, because I REALLY have to use the can!
* Jericho gets up, and runs backstage. Five minutes later, Jericho comes back to find Hogan is STILL profusely sweating and STILL trying to catch his breath. Jericho snickers , jumps in the ring, and lays down. After five or so minutes, Hogan FINALLY manages to cover Jericho, and gets the three count *
J.R.: Good lord almighty!! That was one hell-of-a-match that Hogan and Jericho put on tonight!!
Lawler: ...Riiiiigght...
* Hogan's music plays, then the EMT's run out to the ring with a stretcher. They roll Hogan onto it, then leave *
Lawler: ...Hey, look!!! * screams *
* King points to the titon tron screen, showing Triple H crying in the arms of Shawn Michaels *
Triple H: * sob * Oh-uh Shawn-uh... I can't-uh believe-uh that-uh mean man gave-uh me-uh the finger-uh... * sob *
Shawn: It's alright, Hunter, I'll take care of you... now...
* Shawn gently runs his fingers through Triple H's hair, then kisses his forehead *
Shawn: ...and forever...
* Triple H gazes into Shawn's eyes, then suddenly the screen turns black *
Lawler: ... * screams for two minutes straight *
* After about five minutes, the titon tron screen shows two naked men making out on top of Vince's limo, Michael Cole and Tazz *
J.R.: Mah gawd, King!! How did they get back into the buliding?!?!
Lawler: * screams * I don't know, J.R.!! But... who's that?!?!
J.R.: It's Tris -- er -- Marc Lloyd!!!
* Marc walks over to Tazz and Michael Cole, (still wearing fake boobs and a skirt, I might add) and taps Tazz on the shoulder *
Marc Lloyd: Heeeey! Tazzie! Can I join in?!?!
* Tazz glares at Marc before responding *
Tazz: Get your ass over here bitch, heh heh!!!
Michael Cole: Yeah!! * girly giggle * there's ALWAYS room for one more!!
* Marc then strips down to nothing and joins Tazz and Michael *
Lawler: ... * screams for two minutes straight AGAIN *
J.R.: Oh mah gawd, King!! Look!!
* Yet another scene is shown on the titon tron. It shows Vince, Stephanie, and Eric Bischoff in Vince's office, sitting at a table discussing something *
J.R.: Sweet BBQ sauce!! What do you think they're talking about, King?!?
Lawler: * screams * Maybe HLA?!?!?!
J.R.: Oh, come on, King!! I'm being serious here!!
Lawler: So am I!! * screams *
~*~
Author's Note: Well... that's it for chapter two. ^_~ I hope you guys enjoyed it. Peace.
~*~
What are Vince, Stephanie, and Eric Bischoff discussing in Vince's office?!?
What kind of relationship do HHH and Shawn Michaels REALLY have?!?
Will Tazz, Michael, and Marc be caught and thrown out by sercurity AGAIN?!?!
Find out on the next chapter of 'WhackDown!'.