Disclaimer: Don't own it! (And considering what I've done to poor Mr.
Tolkien's work, it's a good thing, too!) Thank you everyone for reviewing
and a huge thanks goes to addicted for telling me how to get it spaced out
when uploaded, since I'm a moron when it comes to technology! Even though
dumb football players typically date cheerleaders, I refuse to stoop as low
as slash! So FORGET it! And now, Chapter 3!
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The rain had finally stopped and the hobbits felt that it was okay to finally come out.
"EEEEEWWWWW!!! Like, look at all the mud!" cried Frodo.
"I, like, stained my cloak! Now I'll look fat AND ugly!" Pippen exclaimed, feeling as if it couldn't get much worse.
Boromir was explaining to Gimli that there couldn't possibly be any visible goldfish tracks now, because the rain had washed them all away.
" Shucks! I wuz kinda hopin' that I might see me some interstin' wildlife!" said Gimli disappointed..
Gandalf on the other hand was still extremely high and was still talking to one of his imaginary homies. They were having a conversation about the strange effects of Jell-O when Legolas and Aragorn showed up.
"Gandalf, look who I found! We can get this trip over with now!" called Legolas.
"What da hell be wrong wit you?!" yelled Gandalf, so disturbed by Legolas's appearance that he was instantly shaken out of the state he was in. "Whoa! Where da hell'd y'all go?!" he said, noticing that his homies had disappeared.
Aragorn stood silent trying to figure out what was going on with Gandalf, when it finally clicked.
"You were high, weren't you!?!" he said, proud of his observational skills.
Legolas was ready to "accidentally" lose Aragorn again already.
Just then Frodo, Sam, Pippen, and Merry showed up. Even though hobbits are against shoes, the hobbits had tied leaves on their feet in a desperate attempt to avoid getting mud on their feet. Sam was particularly having trouble.
"EW, EW, EW, EW,!! It's still, like, getting on my feet! I'll, like, never survive the dirt on this trip! Elrond is, SO, like, going to pay for this when I get back! I'm going to kill hi--- Hey, that's Aragorn! Like, hi!" he said.
"Hi," he said with a blank look on his face.
"Okay, so, let's get moving. Where are Boromir and Gimli?" asked Legolas, ready to end this little vacation.
"We're right here, we're coming!" called Boromir.
Gimli and Boromir arrived and they discussed where to go to from there. The hobbits wanted to go the cleanest route, while Gimli wanted to go through Moria, which was a lot like his native Arkansas. (Except in Arkansas, you have to worry about out of control tractors instead of orcs.) Gandalf was neutral. He was high when he volunteered to be the leader of the fellowship, and had no memory of volunteering. Therefore, he had no idea that he was supposed to be leading the others. Legolas didn't care how they got there, but he wanted to get there as soon as possible, because he couldn't take much more of whining hobbits, gangsters, and just plain dumb people.
"If we go east through the Misty Mountains, particularly over Caradhras, it would take us approximately two days to get to the other side. That is of course if it is no colder than twenty degrees Fahrenheit and the wind is blowing southeast. Also if my calculations are right we should only be about fifteen miles from the base of Caradhras and if we start moving now we can be at the base by nightfall," said Boromir while the others stared at him in disbelief. "And maybe we'll see some fresh goldfish tracks in the snow!" It was like a flash of lightning. One flash of brilliance, and it was gone.
"Alright then, we go over Caradhras," said Legolas. "Lead the way, fearless leader."
"Who, me?" asked Gandalf bewildered. " You trippin' elf-boy!"
"Fine I'll do it myself!" said Legolas. "Follow me!"
"Uh, where are we going again?" asked Aragorn.
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Well, it's nearly midnight, and the caffeine in the Pepsi is starting where off. Thanks for reading, Chapter 4 is coming soon! Please R&R or I will have nothing to be happy about when I get home from that hellhole called high school.!
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* ~*~*
The rain had finally stopped and the hobbits felt that it was okay to finally come out.
"EEEEEWWWWW!!! Like, look at all the mud!" cried Frodo.
"I, like, stained my cloak! Now I'll look fat AND ugly!" Pippen exclaimed, feeling as if it couldn't get much worse.
Boromir was explaining to Gimli that there couldn't possibly be any visible goldfish tracks now, because the rain had washed them all away.
" Shucks! I wuz kinda hopin' that I might see me some interstin' wildlife!" said Gimli disappointed..
Gandalf on the other hand was still extremely high and was still talking to one of his imaginary homies. They were having a conversation about the strange effects of Jell-O when Legolas and Aragorn showed up.
"Gandalf, look who I found! We can get this trip over with now!" called Legolas.
"What da hell be wrong wit you?!" yelled Gandalf, so disturbed by Legolas's appearance that he was instantly shaken out of the state he was in. "Whoa! Where da hell'd y'all go?!" he said, noticing that his homies had disappeared.
Aragorn stood silent trying to figure out what was going on with Gandalf, when it finally clicked.
"You were high, weren't you!?!" he said, proud of his observational skills.
Legolas was ready to "accidentally" lose Aragorn again already.
Just then Frodo, Sam, Pippen, and Merry showed up. Even though hobbits are against shoes, the hobbits had tied leaves on their feet in a desperate attempt to avoid getting mud on their feet. Sam was particularly having trouble.
"EW, EW, EW, EW,!! It's still, like, getting on my feet! I'll, like, never survive the dirt on this trip! Elrond is, SO, like, going to pay for this when I get back! I'm going to kill hi--- Hey, that's Aragorn! Like, hi!" he said.
"Hi," he said with a blank look on his face.
"Okay, so, let's get moving. Where are Boromir and Gimli?" asked Legolas, ready to end this little vacation.
"We're right here, we're coming!" called Boromir.
Gimli and Boromir arrived and they discussed where to go to from there. The hobbits wanted to go the cleanest route, while Gimli wanted to go through Moria, which was a lot like his native Arkansas. (Except in Arkansas, you have to worry about out of control tractors instead of orcs.) Gandalf was neutral. He was high when he volunteered to be the leader of the fellowship, and had no memory of volunteering. Therefore, he had no idea that he was supposed to be leading the others. Legolas didn't care how they got there, but he wanted to get there as soon as possible, because he couldn't take much more of whining hobbits, gangsters, and just plain dumb people.
"If we go east through the Misty Mountains, particularly over Caradhras, it would take us approximately two days to get to the other side. That is of course if it is no colder than twenty degrees Fahrenheit and the wind is blowing southeast. Also if my calculations are right we should only be about fifteen miles from the base of Caradhras and if we start moving now we can be at the base by nightfall," said Boromir while the others stared at him in disbelief. "And maybe we'll see some fresh goldfish tracks in the snow!" It was like a flash of lightning. One flash of brilliance, and it was gone.
"Alright then, we go over Caradhras," said Legolas. "Lead the way, fearless leader."
"Who, me?" asked Gandalf bewildered. " You trippin' elf-boy!"
"Fine I'll do it myself!" said Legolas. "Follow me!"
"Uh, where are we going again?" asked Aragorn.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* ~*~*~
Well, it's nearly midnight, and the caffeine in the Pepsi is starting where off. Thanks for reading, Chapter 4 is coming soon! Please R&R or I will have nothing to be happy about when I get home from that hellhole called high school.!