Chapter 6: Leia!!!
"LEIA!!!"
Han Sola fell against a wall, not taking his eyes off her.
Leia was wearing a Union Jack sleeveless dress that ran 5 inches short her knees with ankle-high black leather boots and her hair cut in a chin-length choppy Cameron Diaz style. Her head was bobbing with laugher as she danced with the guy in strange bright clothing and thick glasses, struggling not to spill the champagne held loosely by her manicured hand. Han treaded forward.
"Who the h*** is that man!?!?!" Han's eyes bulged, his face red with fury.
Leia turned innocently and giggled, obviously a little tipsy.
"Oh, you mean Austin? This is the International Man of Mystery, Austin Powers. Austin, this Han Solo, the Galactic A** of Misery."
Austin couldn't help a smile.
"This is quite a shagadelic ship you got here! Did ya make it?"
Han glared. He glared, and then, he spoke.
"Get out."
A very p***ed off Leia slapped Han's red face.
"Han Solo! How could you say that? Austin is going to., is going to, he going to,.,., Austin is going to help us defeat Darth Vader."
Austin's ears perked up.
"This wacked up son of a b**** is going to beat up the second strongest Imperial in the galaxy?"
Leia radiated a newborn confidence.
"Yes, he is! Austin Powers is the most renowned secret agent in his planet! And," a brilliant idea popped into Leia's head, "he has something even stronger than the force!"
"And what is that?" Han asked with hand on hip near a tempting blaster.
Leia's eyes were 4 inches from Hans' and she whispered, "He won me over, no?"
Han stopped and thought it over. He couldn't argue against that.
"All right. He can stay."
Austin jumped and did a little dance.
"Groovy! We're roommates! Let's get the party started!"
"I couldn't have said it better myself!"
Shakin to Shakira's 'Tango' (I can't get enough of that song!), Austin and Leia tangoed on the Cadillac.
"If anyone cares," Han weakly offered, wishing dearly for Leia. "We're going to Bespin to get our hyperdrive fixed." Han walked reluctantly back to the cockpit. He didn't even bother to tell them that he knew a friend there.
Leia drew herself closer to Austin.
"So, we're going to deal with this Darth Vader figure."
Leia rolled her eyes.
"Yes, yes, but first deal with my figure! Keep dancing!" Austin chuckled.
"Anything for you, baby!"
They sat down on the Cadillac's hood and ate some Starbucks Mud Pie Ice Cream (best stuff on earth) and gazed at the starry view shimmering before them.
"You have to be really careful, Austin."
"What's that, love?"
"You have to be really careful with Darth Vader. He's ruthless and evil, and, and I don't want to lose you, like," Leia felt the cold brush of her memories and shuddered to Austin.
"What's wrong, doll?"
Leia blinked back tears and forced a smile.
"Nothing, Austin. You'll be fine. Let's shag."
"LEIA!!!"
Han Sola fell against a wall, not taking his eyes off her.
Leia was wearing a Union Jack sleeveless dress that ran 5 inches short her knees with ankle-high black leather boots and her hair cut in a chin-length choppy Cameron Diaz style. Her head was bobbing with laugher as she danced with the guy in strange bright clothing and thick glasses, struggling not to spill the champagne held loosely by her manicured hand. Han treaded forward.
"Who the h*** is that man!?!?!" Han's eyes bulged, his face red with fury.
Leia turned innocently and giggled, obviously a little tipsy.
"Oh, you mean Austin? This is the International Man of Mystery, Austin Powers. Austin, this Han Solo, the Galactic A** of Misery."
Austin couldn't help a smile.
"This is quite a shagadelic ship you got here! Did ya make it?"
Han glared. He glared, and then, he spoke.
"Get out."
A very p***ed off Leia slapped Han's red face.
"Han Solo! How could you say that? Austin is going to., is going to, he going to,.,., Austin is going to help us defeat Darth Vader."
Austin's ears perked up.
"This wacked up son of a b**** is going to beat up the second strongest Imperial in the galaxy?"
Leia radiated a newborn confidence.
"Yes, he is! Austin Powers is the most renowned secret agent in his planet! And," a brilliant idea popped into Leia's head, "he has something even stronger than the force!"
"And what is that?" Han asked with hand on hip near a tempting blaster.
Leia's eyes were 4 inches from Hans' and she whispered, "He won me over, no?"
Han stopped and thought it over. He couldn't argue against that.
"All right. He can stay."
Austin jumped and did a little dance.
"Groovy! We're roommates! Let's get the party started!"
"I couldn't have said it better myself!"
Shakin to Shakira's 'Tango' (I can't get enough of that song!), Austin and Leia tangoed on the Cadillac.
"If anyone cares," Han weakly offered, wishing dearly for Leia. "We're going to Bespin to get our hyperdrive fixed." Han walked reluctantly back to the cockpit. He didn't even bother to tell them that he knew a friend there.
Leia drew herself closer to Austin.
"So, we're going to deal with this Darth Vader figure."
Leia rolled her eyes.
"Yes, yes, but first deal with my figure! Keep dancing!" Austin chuckled.
"Anything for you, baby!"
They sat down on the Cadillac's hood and ate some Starbucks Mud Pie Ice Cream (best stuff on earth) and gazed at the starry view shimmering before them.
"You have to be really careful, Austin."
"What's that, love?"
"You have to be really careful with Darth Vader. He's ruthless and evil, and, and I don't want to lose you, like," Leia felt the cold brush of her memories and shuddered to Austin.
"What's wrong, doll?"
Leia blinked back tears and forced a smile.
"Nothing, Austin. You'll be fine. Let's shag."