When his strength was back Dante wondered about. What to get now... He
looked at the bakery. He tossed a box of doughnuts; loaf of bread and a
cake into his cart (smashing the oranges beyond return.) the cake made a
small "Sloosh" as it fell upside down and sat on the fruit and pizzas.
The cleansing products were intriguing to Dante. He picked up a bottle of strawberry shampoo as he passed and tossed into his cart. (No one witnessing this could be sure why a big, muscular, slayer would be interested in "sensational strawberry apple" shampoo...maybe he thought it was a type of yogurt, maybe Trish was stinky, maybe he was just tossing random objects into the shopping cart, but I doubt it was for his own use. Though his hair smelt like monster intestines, the fact of the matter was... it would always smell like monster intestines. Even if he was able to make it smell like "Sensations...whatever" he would just go kill creatures anyway and come homes smelling the same. Poor Dante would never be deliciously smelly.
The half demon warrior stopped and looked at his cart for a moment. "Now...burritos, aw, oranges...pizza, bread, cake, potpie, doughnuts, cleansing product. I'd say that's pretty damn nutritious." Though this DID sound very nutritious in Dante's mind he didn't want to come home with things Trish didn't like. He had seen commercials for...health...food. Aw...Cornflakes.
So, it was off to the cereal isle. Dante stopped abruptly. It seemed to go on forever, only to stop at the section of cereal 'bars' Though this spelt out impending doom, Dante, being a brave demon, entered anyway...
Also in the cereal Isle was the clerk who had previously been stacking apples. He had been appointed (to his misfortune) to now arrange the Count Chocula cereal that had just been restocked.
Dante looked through the loop fruits and health brands in despair. "And they want you to just pick one? WHO NEEDS THIS SELECTION!?" The clerk, (name tag reading mike.) Looked up for a moment, but then went back to his job, though he was working with much more enthusiasm now. Oh god...when would this nut case be leaving?
Dante stopped, pausing in front of the cereal and curiously lifted up a box of cheerios. "Do...these really lower cholesterol?" "What?" The clerk looked up at the tall white haired man. "How should I know?" He shrugged and went back to his work muttering "Psycho" just audible enough for Dante's demon ears to catch.
With lightening quick speed the young clerk found himself pushed forcefully into the cereal he had previously stacked. "Look.... MIKE!" Dante screamed, "Lets say, for just a moment, I AM a psycho! This particular PSYCHO wants to know if these little O's really lower cholesterol! Well...DO THEY?!"
Before the frightened clerk cloud answer he was tossed out of the way. Apparently the Count Chocula Puffs had caught Dante's attention. He stood, mouth gaping for a moment. Then unsheathed his humongous sword in complete insanity. "Count...Chocula?!" He swung his sword, causing the coco breakfast cereal to fly all about the isles. "YOU PEOPLE SUPPORT THE FORCES OF HELL NOW!?" He let out a large and mangled roar. "Do you all WANT hellish creatures to eat your children and destroy the earth! That only caused more jobs for me to take care of! More of your PATHETIC PROBLEMS to fix! MWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" Now puffs of chocolaty goodness were flying all about Mike the clerk. Over in the neighboring Isle a woman screamed in surprise as a count chocula crisp flew into her left eye.
Dante paid no attention. He just continued on his rampage until every box was in pieces. Then, in utter disgust mind you, he pushed the shelf over, tossed his shopping cart into a near by chip rack and stomped back to the frozen section to grab a potpie and get the hell out of the Chow mart. Screw his previous items. TRISH COULD DEAL WITH A POTPIE.
Now in frenzy, Dante swung the door of the freezer open (and broke the glass abruptly due to his force.) He swiped a potpie, little pizzas and pack of Popsicles that looked 'yummy.' and ran off eccentrically to the express line.
There he stood.
Crisps of chocolate cereal sitting happily in his milky white hair,
Listening to a baby cry and cry and cry,
Listening to the beep of the cash register,
Thinking about the demonic cereal,
Stress level rising to the nine thousands,
And Both eyes were now twitching
Just.... one...big...endless.... convulsion.
Dante only needed a dribble of drool running down his chin to look like a complete LUNATIC. All patients that he had previously had now sat with the smashed oranges and upside down cake in the cart of chips. This store WOULD be obliterated. He would blow it sky high and then pee.... all over the ashes of Chow Mart. Dante's lip curved up as he thought about it, a small chuckle rose from his mouth which would have broke into hysterical laughter if his thoughts of urinating on a pile of cinders where once the Chow mart stood weren't interrupted by the cashier.
"Sir, do you have a Chow Value card?" Dante looked manically at the young boy behind the cash register. "A what?!" "A...chow value card...it saves you money." Dante sat there blankly for a moment then pointed his chocolate coded weapon at the checker. "I HAVE THIS! START DOING SOME SAVING GODDAMNIT!"
his total -for pizza, potpie and Popsicles- came up 2.00. no one planned on charging him the real price with out the value card. He was crazy and all Chow mart wanted to was make him leave. Everyone in the store gave a huge sigh of relief after nervously bagging his items and watching his walk away irritably.
Now, you'd think that Dante would get a break, you'd think that he has had enough awful things happen to him -but no.- he cant even go shopping for the moment he walked out of the store a Toyota hit him. His body flew about 51/2 feet and landed with a thud on the pavement, but more importantly, his food went sprawling out across the parking lot.
The driver quickly exited the car to take a look at the would-be road kill that is until; it stood up and howled in fury. "GRAAWWW!" The Toyota went flying into the side of the grocery store, knocking the coca cola machine over and causing a series of explosions in the electronic horsy ride (not to mention scaring many of the customers that were INSIDE the store.) Everything in the car seemed to go off at once with only agitated the hysterical Dante further and with a large blue wave of light the car exploded into oblivion. The scrawny teenager grabbed his hair and looked at the burning rubble in fear.
"My moms gunna KILL me!"
Dante spun around twitching in all direction, on the breaking point of sanity. "YOUR MOM!? YOUR MOM? IM SCARIER THEN YOUR MOM!" apparently the teen believed him, because he went running frantically off into nowhere to escape the sword flinging maniac.
Around this time, a frail red haired woman was walking briskly out of the store. She tried her best not to make eye contact with the homicidal half demon, who sat picking up his items in despair. She figured it would be much better just to ignore him and go about her own business, unfortunately for her.... this was not an option.
When Dante had saw her and her two nicely intact bags of food he had come to the conclusion that walking over, taking her things and hoping on his motorcycle would be much more easy and make Trish much more happy. He accomplished this conclusion too with only a knee to the groin and stab wound from a pen she had been carrying. Little had he known this was also the woman who's eye socket had been invaded with a coco puff from the count chocula fiasco. (and later on in the day lost vision in her left eye presently. DAMN those chocolate cereals.)
Dante got home and quickly collapsed into his chair (which yes, was clear of Trish vomit.) He proceeded to look through the groceries with Trish. Cat food, wheat bread, some half price cheese, instant pudding, coffee mix, bananas and an issue of Martha Stewit living. Not to bad...could have been worse.
Dante sat down, Martha Stewit living magazine in hand and picked a chocolate flake out of his hair. It really wasn't to bad for something advertised by hell. *Munch, munch, and munch.... *
Once again, go ahead and review if you wish. Knock yourselves out. -Hey, even you flamers- what is with you flamers anyway? Do you...just have nothing else to do? Are you mean and bitter old men? Are you just ppl with your hearts rotting away to a pile of mucus? Well, whatever the cause make sure you make um' nice and juicy this time. Give me something to read. ~Thanks to you nice ppl, though. Its great to know not everyone disserves to be eliminated.
The cleansing products were intriguing to Dante. He picked up a bottle of strawberry shampoo as he passed and tossed into his cart. (No one witnessing this could be sure why a big, muscular, slayer would be interested in "sensational strawberry apple" shampoo...maybe he thought it was a type of yogurt, maybe Trish was stinky, maybe he was just tossing random objects into the shopping cart, but I doubt it was for his own use. Though his hair smelt like monster intestines, the fact of the matter was... it would always smell like monster intestines. Even if he was able to make it smell like "Sensations...whatever" he would just go kill creatures anyway and come homes smelling the same. Poor Dante would never be deliciously smelly.
The half demon warrior stopped and looked at his cart for a moment. "Now...burritos, aw, oranges...pizza, bread, cake, potpie, doughnuts, cleansing product. I'd say that's pretty damn nutritious." Though this DID sound very nutritious in Dante's mind he didn't want to come home with things Trish didn't like. He had seen commercials for...health...food. Aw...Cornflakes.
So, it was off to the cereal isle. Dante stopped abruptly. It seemed to go on forever, only to stop at the section of cereal 'bars' Though this spelt out impending doom, Dante, being a brave demon, entered anyway...
Also in the cereal Isle was the clerk who had previously been stacking apples. He had been appointed (to his misfortune) to now arrange the Count Chocula cereal that had just been restocked.
Dante looked through the loop fruits and health brands in despair. "And they want you to just pick one? WHO NEEDS THIS SELECTION!?" The clerk, (name tag reading mike.) Looked up for a moment, but then went back to his job, though he was working with much more enthusiasm now. Oh god...when would this nut case be leaving?
Dante stopped, pausing in front of the cereal and curiously lifted up a box of cheerios. "Do...these really lower cholesterol?" "What?" The clerk looked up at the tall white haired man. "How should I know?" He shrugged and went back to his work muttering "Psycho" just audible enough for Dante's demon ears to catch.
With lightening quick speed the young clerk found himself pushed forcefully into the cereal he had previously stacked. "Look.... MIKE!" Dante screamed, "Lets say, for just a moment, I AM a psycho! This particular PSYCHO wants to know if these little O's really lower cholesterol! Well...DO THEY?!"
Before the frightened clerk cloud answer he was tossed out of the way. Apparently the Count Chocula Puffs had caught Dante's attention. He stood, mouth gaping for a moment. Then unsheathed his humongous sword in complete insanity. "Count...Chocula?!" He swung his sword, causing the coco breakfast cereal to fly all about the isles. "YOU PEOPLE SUPPORT THE FORCES OF HELL NOW!?" He let out a large and mangled roar. "Do you all WANT hellish creatures to eat your children and destroy the earth! That only caused more jobs for me to take care of! More of your PATHETIC PROBLEMS to fix! MWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" Now puffs of chocolaty goodness were flying all about Mike the clerk. Over in the neighboring Isle a woman screamed in surprise as a count chocula crisp flew into her left eye.
Dante paid no attention. He just continued on his rampage until every box was in pieces. Then, in utter disgust mind you, he pushed the shelf over, tossed his shopping cart into a near by chip rack and stomped back to the frozen section to grab a potpie and get the hell out of the Chow mart. Screw his previous items. TRISH COULD DEAL WITH A POTPIE.
Now in frenzy, Dante swung the door of the freezer open (and broke the glass abruptly due to his force.) He swiped a potpie, little pizzas and pack of Popsicles that looked 'yummy.' and ran off eccentrically to the express line.
There he stood.
Crisps of chocolate cereal sitting happily in his milky white hair,
Listening to a baby cry and cry and cry,
Listening to the beep of the cash register,
Thinking about the demonic cereal,
Stress level rising to the nine thousands,
And Both eyes were now twitching
Just.... one...big...endless.... convulsion.
Dante only needed a dribble of drool running down his chin to look like a complete LUNATIC. All patients that he had previously had now sat with the smashed oranges and upside down cake in the cart of chips. This store WOULD be obliterated. He would blow it sky high and then pee.... all over the ashes of Chow Mart. Dante's lip curved up as he thought about it, a small chuckle rose from his mouth which would have broke into hysterical laughter if his thoughts of urinating on a pile of cinders where once the Chow mart stood weren't interrupted by the cashier.
"Sir, do you have a Chow Value card?" Dante looked manically at the young boy behind the cash register. "A what?!" "A...chow value card...it saves you money." Dante sat there blankly for a moment then pointed his chocolate coded weapon at the checker. "I HAVE THIS! START DOING SOME SAVING GODDAMNIT!"
his total -for pizza, potpie and Popsicles- came up 2.00. no one planned on charging him the real price with out the value card. He was crazy and all Chow mart wanted to was make him leave. Everyone in the store gave a huge sigh of relief after nervously bagging his items and watching his walk away irritably.
Now, you'd think that Dante would get a break, you'd think that he has had enough awful things happen to him -but no.- he cant even go shopping for the moment he walked out of the store a Toyota hit him. His body flew about 51/2 feet and landed with a thud on the pavement, but more importantly, his food went sprawling out across the parking lot.
The driver quickly exited the car to take a look at the would-be road kill that is until; it stood up and howled in fury. "GRAAWWW!" The Toyota went flying into the side of the grocery store, knocking the coca cola machine over and causing a series of explosions in the electronic horsy ride (not to mention scaring many of the customers that were INSIDE the store.) Everything in the car seemed to go off at once with only agitated the hysterical Dante further and with a large blue wave of light the car exploded into oblivion. The scrawny teenager grabbed his hair and looked at the burning rubble in fear.
"My moms gunna KILL me!"
Dante spun around twitching in all direction, on the breaking point of sanity. "YOUR MOM!? YOUR MOM? IM SCARIER THEN YOUR MOM!" apparently the teen believed him, because he went running frantically off into nowhere to escape the sword flinging maniac.
Around this time, a frail red haired woman was walking briskly out of the store. She tried her best not to make eye contact with the homicidal half demon, who sat picking up his items in despair. She figured it would be much better just to ignore him and go about her own business, unfortunately for her.... this was not an option.
When Dante had saw her and her two nicely intact bags of food he had come to the conclusion that walking over, taking her things and hoping on his motorcycle would be much more easy and make Trish much more happy. He accomplished this conclusion too with only a knee to the groin and stab wound from a pen she had been carrying. Little had he known this was also the woman who's eye socket had been invaded with a coco puff from the count chocula fiasco. (and later on in the day lost vision in her left eye presently. DAMN those chocolate cereals.)
Dante got home and quickly collapsed into his chair (which yes, was clear of Trish vomit.) He proceeded to look through the groceries with Trish. Cat food, wheat bread, some half price cheese, instant pudding, coffee mix, bananas and an issue of Martha Stewit living. Not to bad...could have been worse.
Dante sat down, Martha Stewit living magazine in hand and picked a chocolate flake out of his hair. It really wasn't to bad for something advertised by hell. *Munch, munch, and munch.... *
Once again, go ahead and review if you wish. Knock yourselves out. -Hey, even you flamers- what is with you flamers anyway? Do you...just have nothing else to do? Are you mean and bitter old men? Are you just ppl with your hearts rotting away to a pile of mucus? Well, whatever the cause make sure you make um' nice and juicy this time. Give me something to read. ~Thanks to you nice ppl, though. Its great to know not everyone disserves to be eliminated.