Return to Hogwarts

Um, I refuse to explain it. Either read it and like it for some reason or don't. It goes along with my comic the Elf and I. Which is really just about the stories in my head, I suppose. So that's all this is. A story in my head. Reference to some events practically no one knows about, i.e. my first "visit" to Hogwarts. I won't say exactly what happened there. You might be able to figure out some of it.

------

Severus Snape was sitting in his office. It wasn't that he particularly wanted to be there, he just was. He had to be. His papers wouldn't grade themselves.

Actually, there was probably a spell for that somewhere.

Then again, if there was, it was probably fraught with errors and outlawed by Dumbledore. Snape let out a large, weary sigh. Somehow, somewhere, he had let himself fall into this terrible drudgery and it was now his life. Where had he gone wrong? Oh, yes, there was that entire thing about being a Death-Eater. That probably accounted for a good deal of it. Snape rubbed the mark on his arm agitatedly. He had made a mistake. A huge mistake. A mistake he would be paying for the rest of his life, however short that may be. Snape was not a very optimistic man on the subject. He knew just as well as Dumbledore that Voldemort was returning, and that spelled trouble. Life-threatening trouble.

As Snape let his mind wander, the stack of papers gradually grew smaller until a mere handful remained. He was now working on Harry Potter's paper, meticulously looking for even the tiniest of mistakes with which to punish Potter. Oh, how he hated the boy. Oh, how he envied him.

The hairs on the back of Snape's neck began to prickle. At first, Snape thought of Voldemort, but this was different. It was an odd, magical sensation, and one he had felt only once before.

As if on cue, a small ball of light appeared in the space between Snape's desk and the doorway. Snape instantly sat up, eyes widening and mouth dropping open in surprise and dread. No, it couldn't possibly be, not again- -

The ball of light expanded quickly, bloating to the size of a person in the blink of an eye. Indeed, within moment a person had come hurtling through the blue-white portal, spilling out onto Snape's floor as the portal snapped shut behind her. Snape rose to his feet, ready to call out in alarm, or for help, or in an attempt to drive the intruder back form whence he had came. He found himself at a loss for words and merely managed a half- strangled, "You!"

The girl on the ground sat up. She seemed mostly unharmed for having fallen on the floor so roughly. Her short brown hair was in a state of disarray and her glasses sat askew on her face. Large blue eyes blinked in surprise. "Wh--where--I don't believe it."

Snape finally regained enough of his senses to point a crooked finger at the girl and growl in anger, "You! What are you doing here?"

"Pruh-Professor!" the girl exclaimed in reply. She glanced about the room a few times to make sure it was real and scrambled to her feet. There, about a meter away from Snape, she stood in seeming shock with her mouth falling open. A stray tendril of hair tucked itself into the corner of her mouth.

"What are you doing here?" Snape demanded once again. "I told you I won't go with you, and I haven't changed my mind!" His accusing finger had dropped back down to his side and been balled into a fist.

The girl did not reply at first, gazing at him in awe. Then, she wavered in the air as if to fall and her eyes filed with tears. She did fall, but not to the ground. She fell forward onto Snape, grabbing his robes and wailing, her grip as solid as an iron shackle. "Oh, Professor, I'm so glad I found you! I thought I'd be lost forever!"

"What are you talking about?" Snape asked, trying to pull the girl off himself. He succeeded only because she opened her hands and stepped back by herself.

"It's terrible, Professor! The dimensional chorus -- the barrier -- is broken! And we're all lost! I can't figure out how to get home, and we all get thrown to different times and places. I--you should have seen the last one, it was horrid. It's--it's just too much!"

For a moment, Snape wondered just what had been going on. This was not the same confident, exuberant girl he had met on a prior night, a girl who had kissed him on the forehead and told him she'd understood why he never washed his hair. And she'd been right. Still, he couldn't help but to be angry with her for returning after he had asked her to leave.

The girl moved over and sat down in the chair in front of Snape's desk, rubbing at her reddened eyes. She seemed so small. Snape wondered if there was any way for him to explain this to Dumbledore. He crossed his arms and looked down at her disdainfully, awaiting some sort of explanation.

As if sensing what is was he wanted, the girl took a deep breath and began to speak. "It was all pretty routine, really. We were supposed to be heading home, and then something went wrong. We don't know what. Now we're hurtling through the dimensions with no control over where we go. Last time I was with Daerinnid, but I can't find Kancho. So I have to keep on going until I do. I--Kancho is like a father to me, I can't bear to be without him like this! I really want to go home! I'm sorry, I know you don't want me back here, but please understand it wasn't my fault... I'm lost, we're all lost..."

Naturally, Snape understood little of the girl's rambling, but he did understand that she was a dimension-traveler. That much she had said the first time the had met. Now she was lost? "I don't know what to do, I really don't. Please say I can stay here with you for a little while? I don't want to go out there again!"

Aha, so that was what she wanted. No mercy. Snape scowled at her. "No, you may not stay here. Now kindly remove yourself from this room." The way he said the word "kindly" sounded like pure acid.

"Oh, but please, Professor! I'm lost! I want to go home, but this is the closest I've gotten so far. Please say I can stay, just for a little bit?"

"No!"

She looked away. "Kruh-krill jist trannik vrail denvrek, shtivannis! Krailge vannis solbrandr distremdashkrtik, jilfrankbrin sholast kilvahin."

Her words did not seem to make sense, but the meaning ate its way into Snape's brain. It was nearly impossible for him to put into words the multitude of ideas and images her strange language conveyed, but he was able to get enough sense of it to reply in a shaken voice, "I've never heard, no, felt anything like that before. How did you..."

"It's the language Kancho and I speak. Part circumstance, part instinct, but I think you see now that I really do know you better than anyone else and I don't mean you any harm. I just want a warm bed and some food. You don't know how hard it's been to get food. So, please, Professor."

Despite the lingering of the strange thoughts from those words, Snape still shook his head. "No. I could never explain this to Dumbledore and I don't want you here."

"Just give me a chance! Please?"

"No! Now get out!"

"Vril strik kannkil volstannr triskvrindalir nek. Elpre djran krevltenhorhim zhevyelkornan." Snape was reminded of the biblical line this time. Though I walk in the shadow of the valley of death, she seemed to say. There was something about outer space as well, and something about how cold she was. And the hair was in there, too.

"Self-loathing doesn't help anyone, Severus, least of all you. Don't I deserve at least one chance? I know I can make a difference, I can! Just give me a chance. I'll leave if you really want me to, but you don't, do you? You, like me, crave understanding, but are too afraid to open up to get it because you think everyone will hate you, and that they already do. And perhaps you're right. Maybe everyone here does hate you, but I don't. Take a chance, just this once, and I swear to you that you won't regret it. It'll be hard, because it's never easy, but then, all the best things in life are hard. And I think you'll find I'm not really as annoying a brat as I seem."

This was her, the girl he had met on that night months ago, the girl who had pressed him into promising that he would live, the girl who had the audacity to kiss a man she had never met before on the forehead. She had gone from a sobbing mess to a serious confidence in the space of mere moments. Snape had to admit he was a little awed, and just as before, she was right. His face bore an expression that lay somewhere between confusion, curiosity, fear, and helplessness.

Now the girl was standing and approaching him slowly. Snape did not move. She reached a hand out, letting it hang in midair between them. "Please trust someone. If not me, then who? I bear you no malice or grudge. I'm just tired and cold and hungry. We can help each other I think."

Regardless of the intention behind the motion and his willingness at this point to accept it, it was not in Snape's disposition to accept such an invitation by reaching his own hand out. So the girl didn't truly know everything about him, did she?

Then again, the girl withdrew her hand and smiled. "Thank you."

Surprise reigned once again. "For what? I haven't done anything for you."

"Yes, you have. You haven't kicked me out. You've accepted my invitation."

"I have not!" he said indignantly.

"Yes, you have. I can see it in your eyes."

Snape gave a haughty, "Hmmph," and looked down his nose at her. His gaze wasn't cruel, but it wasn't friendly either. It had settled into a look of cold neutrality. An emotionless mask to hide behind. The girl wasn't phased and merely smiled again.

"Well, I guess now we'll have to go and talk to Dumbledore about my accommodations."

Snape sneered, knowing full well that simply walking up to Dumbledore, introducing yourself and asking to stay at Hogwarts was never going to work, no matter how congenial Dumbledore was. Albus was still the headmaster, and letting anyone who walked up and asked to stay at Hogwarts was simply not conducive to the running of the school.

"What's with that face you're making?" the girl frowned. "You don't think I can do that?"

"Dumbledore is no fool. You simply can't walk up and ask to stay here at Hogwarts. This is a school, not a hotel."

"You sound like you've got molten lava on your tongue," the girl blithely observed, "and I'm not just going to walk up and ask for a room. We're going to walk up and tell him I'm your niece."

"I don't have a niece."

"Then we'll tell him I'm your mother's cousin's daughter. Just close enough to have a real relation without being easily traceable. And it would explain why nobody's ever heard of me. Who talks about their mother's cousin's daughter?"

Snape was certain there was an easier term for that, but not actually having such a relative, he had no idea what it was. He let his upper lip curl into a look of disgust.

"That settles it, then. Let's go." The girl made for the door then stopped. "Well? You coming? I can't very well get there myself, I need you to lead the way."

After a moment's pause Snape turned on his heel and followed her out the door. He walked briskly past her and down the corridors and stairwells that led to Dumbledore's office. The girl looked like she would have dearly loved to examine the furnishings more closely, so Snape put an extra ounce of speed into his step and forced her shorter legs to stumble and trip along behind him in a half-run. She did not complain.

"Cheese doodle."

The gargoyle twisted and turned, revealing the way up to the Headmaster's office. The girl gave a small giggle at the password and Snape's face twisted even further into distaste. He stomped his way up the steps and rapped furiously on the door.

"Yes? Come in."

Snape opened the door and stormed through without bothering to consider the girl behind him at all. The door nearly hit her in the face.

"Oh? Who's this?" Dumbledore inquired instantly upon spotting an unfamiliar face.

"This is my," Snape began before being quickly interrupted.

"My name's Emperial Teal Atreipie, but you can call me Em. Pleased to meet you! Uncle Severus has told me so much about you, Headmaster Dumbledore, and it's a real honor!" Her hand shot out over Dumbledore's desk, where it was intercepted by the headmaster's spindly hand and gently shaken.

"Uncle?" Dumbledore lightly inquired. "Severus never mentioned he had a niece."

"Ah, I'm not his niece, really. My granddad and Uncle Severus's mom are cousins."

Under his breath, Severus corrected, "Were." The mark on his arm flared up momentarily, though it may just have been his imagination.

"I see," Dumbledore replied, an eyebrow raising quizzically in Snape's direction. Snape looked like he as about ready to throw himself out the window. "And what, pray tell, my dear, are you doing here at Hogwarts?"

"Why, I'm here to visit Uncle Severus, of course! My school is on holiday."

"Lallinum," Snape supplied, regretting helping as soon as the word flew from his mouth.

"Oh, my, that's in South Africa, isn't it?"

A quick glance at Snape confirmed it was, so Em nodded.

"I hope it's not an inconvenience, I kind of dropped in unannounced, I'm afraid. My parents dropped me off on their way to the Great Barrier Reef in Australia."

"Oh, no, not at all, my dear!" Dumbledore chuckled and his eyes twinkled with merriment. The girl's plan had worked, or so it seemed. "Severus, why didn't you tell me of this delightful young lady before? She is positively enchanting." At that, Em blushed and giggled nervously. Now Snape looked like he really was going to jump out the window. "There is the problem of where you shall stay, of course."

"I'll just stay with Uncle Severus!" she beamed as if that were the most obvious idea ever.

"I think not," Snape glowered.

"No, that wouldn't be appropriate at all. Since your uncle is head of House Slytherin, though, I'm sure a bed can be arranged for you in the girl's dormitory there."

Disappointment registered on Em's face and just as quickly departed. "Sure, that sounds fine to me. Oh, ah, when do you eat around here? I'm really hungry."

"Dinner shall be in half an hour."

"Great! I guess I should wait to find a bed until after, then. I'd like to see the school a bit more, if that's okay with you." The last request was directed at Snape, Em turning to face him with a hopeful look on her face.

"I have papers to grade," Snape replied simply. Dumbledore waved at her reassuringly.

"Yes, your 'uncle' is quite a busy man. But I would be glad to have someone else show you around the school in the meantime. I'd do it myself, but I'm afraid I have important matters to attend to. Why don't you take Miss -- ah, Atreipie, was it? -- downstairs and see if you can find a free student."

Snape was all-too-eager to move to open the door.

"Thank you very much, Headmaster Dumbledore! I look forward to seeing you at dinner, then."

"Indeed! Good day."

"See you later!" Em called as she bounded down the steps. Snape threw an unfathomable look to Dumbledore before turning and following the bouncing girl back out into the corridor. Once they were outside, the girl turned to Snape and grinned, "See? I told you it would work."

"I still think you should leave now before someone finds out the truth."

"But I can't!" she protested. "I can't even manifest a portal at the moment, I'm stuck here."

"What?"

"I told you the chorus is broken, and I don't have the device to make portals, and if the chorus is broken I can't very well sing my way out, can I?"

Snape was growing more and more annoyed. "What are you babbling about?"

"Don't I get a school tour? Take me somewhere to find a tour guide and I'll tell you along the way." Snape growled a bit under his breath but complied. "It's all dimensional physics, you see," the girl continued, "and the chorus is what we call the resonance of strings. Strings are what the universe is made up of, tiny little strings. They're the stuff of atoms. Now, by 'singing,' I mean changing the resonance frequency of the strings to change dimensions. All things are parallel in a way, and next to each other, so by changing the local resonance of the strings it's possible to form a portal to another dimension. Do you follow?"

Snape didn't really, but grunted at her to continue.

"Now, my son Talos developed a machine, a device that could change this local resonance. In his dimension, you see, they have a very close parallel neighbor, but he was able to modify the machine so that it would have a broader effect and allow travel between all dimensions, in theory at least. And our minds can perceive resonances, it's part of the imagination. So I can use the machine to travel to things that have been imagined by people in my home dimension because it's only a few resonancies away. And your dimension is one such. It's never perfect, though, as there are infinite dimensions and it's all tempered by my self-resonancy, so I can't get everyone. My own resonance dictates I can only go to so many places, and limits the number of accessible dimensions. But I've got an above-average understanding of it and there's a good thousand million of places I can go, all distinct and unique. So you see, I can only ever visit one Hogwarts and not the infinite Hogwarts that exist, all tempered by my imagination. In any event, at the moment I'm stuck, because the chorus is broken and manifestation is off. I have to wait for a portal to come and then I can open it."

At that, the girl seemed to have finished, and Snape had reached a feasible destination. He pointed straight to a group of three people and said, "Potter, Granger, and Weasley." The girl's eyes widened.

"Harry Potter, Hermione Granger, and Ron Weasley?" Snape ignored her. He figured the least he could do was to force her off on Potter and his group of friends. Let her annoy them for a bit.

"Come here," Snape continued, beckoning the three forward. "This is a relative of mine. You are to show her around the school." While Em looked at them in awe, Snape whirled about and stomped off to his office to finish looking for mistakes in Harry's paper.

Ron grinned at the retreating Snape. "Wonder what's got his greasy head in a rut?"

"Hey!" Em exclaimed. "Don't make fun of the Professor's hair!"

Hermione elbowed Ron to remind him that they still had Snape's relative standing in front of them. "I'm Hermione Granger," she said, "and these are- -"

"Harry Potter and Ron Weasley!" Em finished for her. "Pleased to meet you all! I'm Emperial Teal Atreides-Piett, but you can just call me Em. My full name's a little bit unwieldy, you know?"

"I'll say," quipped Ron.

"Where are you from?" asked Harry.

"Oh, I attend Lallinum, it's in South Africa."

"Blimey," said Ron.

"We're on vacation, so I've come to visit Uncle Severus while my parents are busy."

"Snape is your uncle?" inquired Harry.

"Well, my dad and his mother are cousins. So not really. But it's easier to say."

"Ol' crook-nose got himself a family!" Ron whistled appreciatively.

"His never mentioned it," Hermione supplied.

Em nodded a bit sadly. "He's really not the type."

Noting Em's sudden melancholy, Harry said, "You wanted to see the school?" Em brightened instantly.

"Oh, yes! I've heard so much about it! All the paintings and ghosts and moving staircases!"

"Doesn't your school have those things, too?"

"Oh, but this is Hogwarts!" Em answered as it that made all the difference. In truth, she wasn't sure whether or not Lallinum had such things.

Harry grinned. "Well, there's not much time before dinner, but we can take you up to House Gryffindor. We were just heading there ourselves."

"Oh, Uncle Severus didn't interrupt you from doing something, did he?"

"Well, yeah, but we're used to it." Ron gave a lopsided smile to show that there were no hard feelings over the matter.

"We'd better get moving or we won't have enough time get up there and back for dinner," Hermione reminded them.

"Come on, this way."

So Em followed the trio up the staircases and down the staircases, listening to what little commentary Harry could afford to give her. They did seem to be in a hurry. At last they were in front of the Fat Lady guarding Gryffindor, and here they stopped. Harry, Hermione, and Ron exchanged nervous looks.

"Oh, it'll be okay, just this once," Ron said, and Em realized they were nervous about saying the password in front of her.

"Don't worry, I won't tell anyone what it is!" At that, Harry smiled.

"____," said Hermione. The painting swung open and they walked into the Gryffindor Common Room.

Instantly upon entering, someone asked, "Hey, who's that with you there, Harry?"

"This is Em, she's staying at Hogwarts for a bit."

"She's a relative of Snape's," Ron said, though it was uncertain whether he was trying to be helpful or just the opposite. Em stuck her tongue out at him.

"Ro-on," Hermione said reproachfully. Ron just grinned.

Harry interrupted before anyone took the teasing too far. "If you'll wait here a moment, we have to get some books. Feel free to make yourself comfortable. We'll be back down in a minute and head down for dinner."

"Sure thing! Thanks for the tour, Harry. It was a pleasure meeting all of you."

"Hey, can you say something in South African?" Ron asked quickly.

"Uhm, that's not a language..."

"Come on, Ron!" Hermione practically dragged him up the stairs.

Em looked around at the Common Room, examining every inch of it. The room was currently occupied by three Griffyndor boys and two girls. Em smiled at them as her eyes swept past. It was hardly the most generous acknowledgment, but she was too busy trying to soak up all the visual information. Who'd have thought she, Emperial Teal Atreides-Piett, would ever be standing here, the Common Room of House Gryffindor?

There was the sound of footsteps on the stairwell signaling the return of Harry, Hermione, and Ron. The three were carrying tomes of impressive size. "We just need to bring these back to the library and then we'll go to dinner," Harry explained.

"Sure thing."

-----

When at last they made it to the dining hall it was amidst a throng of hungry students. Em found herself pushed forward with the crowd and barely managed to maintain contact with Harry, Ron, and Hermione. She walked halfway up the room with them before stopping short.

Snape was sitting up at the teachers' table. Their eyes locked. Snape was looking characteristically unhappy, as if he had swallowed a dead rat. Em kept her gaze steady and firm, her mouth pulling into a serious frown, her body unmoved by the students pushing past her. A tall student walked between them, breaking the contact, and it was then that Em noticed Dumbledore, who was also looking at her, albeit far more happily. He waved a hand towards an empty chair next to Snape and nodded at her.

Em cut through the crowd expertly, ducking and weaving her way up to the front of the room. After a short mental debate as to how best to reach the proffered seat, she chose the most direct route and scurried underneath the table, popping up in the chair next to Snape to the chagrined frowns of the nearby professors. Dumbledore looked like he was having a hard time controlling his mirth.

"I hope you had fun," Snape said acidly.

"Oh, yes. Harry and his friends were most helpful, though you know of course that they don't like you very much."

Snape looked like he was about ready to throttle Em. She turned to face him.

"You haven't really given them any reason to think otherwise," she pointed out, her voice cold. "But if it's any consolation, Harry doesn't hate you nearly as much as you hate him. I guess that means your... idea of self-definition isn't quite working. Or is it the opposite? Hrm, I don't know."

"No, you don't," Snape said, and that was that. Dumbledore signaled for momentary quiet, made some announcements neither Em nor the glowering Snape heard, and food appeared on the table before them.

Both Em and Snape were very silent the first part of the meal. Snape pushed food around on his plate and Em dug into hers with a ferocity akin to someone who had just been rescued from a desert island and had not eaten for years. Her plate was clean in less than ten minutes, at which point she turned to Snape and said, "Eat something, Severus, it's not going to change anything. Not you, not me, not them. Well, it'll make you hungry later if you don't, but that's no skin off anyone else's back."

"Do you ever get tired of hearing yourself?" he sneered.

"Hear this, then. You've got a perfectly good plate of food in front of you while children are starving on the other side of the world in less misery than you. And at least someone cares enough to give you food and ask you to eat. I don't always get that much consideration. Try going to bed hungry because nobody cares enough about you to spare two minutes to make you some food. It's even worse than going to bed hungry because you yourself don't care."

Now Snape was looking even more caustic. The professor sitting on the other side of Em had thankfully chosen to ignore their conversation.

"Will we ever get along, do you think?" Em mused. "We're too similar. Personality clash. Or maybe it's because we're frightened of one another?"

"I don't have to listen to this," Snape said suddenly and stood.

"Sit down and eat, Severus."

"Don't call me that," he hissed, well aware that he had attracted Dumbledore's attention now and had to be careful. He turned in a flurry of black robes and stormed out the side of the room. Em frowned after him.

"Is anything wrong?"

Dumbledore was leaning over the table and looking down at her. Em shook her head.

"Uncle Severus isn't feeling very well. If you'll excuse me a moment, I think I'll get him something from the kitchens."

"One of the elves can do it," Dumbledore replied.

"No, I think I'd better do it myself. I'm sorry, Headmaster." She bowed her head and pushed away from the table.

"You'll need someone to take you. Wait a moment, and I'll come with you."

"Oh, no, you're still eating--"

"The food will not be going anywhere. Not tonight, anyway. Sometimes it does get up and run!"

Em giggled, but she had a feeling she had made a bit too much of a scene today in her haste to reach Severus. Some things had to be done more slowly. Her mind wandered back to Doug for a moment, and how she had failed with him. She didn't want to fail again, but she wasn't certain she had enough time here to do things as slow as was required, so she had been pushing it a little hard today. Not everything I say has to be important, she reminded herself. Perhaps Dumbledore could even be of help. In any event, she followed the old man willingly back to the kitchens.

"Now, what was it you wanted from here?" Dumbledore asked.

"I'm... hrm, I'm not really sure. The kind of thing a concerned mother would make. But not something too boisterous, something a bit subdued, like soup, only not so plain. Something that shows a lot of love."

"My, that is a hard one."

"Like a cake! Only that's very loud. A piece of pound cake, at least, plain and unadorned. And, um, a mug of hot tea and a sandwich? No, not a sandwich." Em tried to think back over all the things her mother had made her, but, failing that, thought of Max. "Casserole?" She chanced a glance over at Dumbledore, who was chuckling in amusement. Then she found herself laughing at the absurdity of it. "I guess my mother never really made me the kind of thing I'm looking for. And neither has Max... Oh! I know! Why didn't I think of it sooner? My dad's the best at making care foods! Umm, umm... Maybe I should stick with the soup. It doesn't have to be so plain, right? Like how about Chinese-style soup with dumplings? Not pork 'cause it's icky, but maybe shrimp or chicken would be fine. Whichever you think he'd like best. Oh! And half a pomegranate in a small bowl. That's for me, though."

"Very well, well, then," Dumbledore concluded, relaying the condensed version of her request to the kitchen elves. It was a very brief wait, as the elves returned almost immediately with a tray. Em thanked them, but upon noticing their reluctance, remembered house elves had trouble with things like that and followed Dumbledore apologetically out the door.

Down and up and through the corridors they went, Dumbledore making what clearly passed for recreational conversation.

"So, how do you like Hogwarts so far?"

"Oh, it's wonderful! Everything I thought it'd be. And more! I never thought I get to see this place."

"Well, your 'uncle' does work here, so surely it didn't seem as remote as possibility as you make it out to be."

"Oh, um, I guess it's not really. But still. It's pretty cool."

"Tell me, you sound more American than anything else," Dumbledore prompted. Em quickly turned several shades of red.

"My family's American, I just live in South Africa. They travel a lot and liked it best down there. To make a difference in the social situation. There's a lot of tension, you know." Em gave a silent prayer of thanks to Time magazine.

"Ah, yes, indeed."

Before Dumbledore could open up a new can of worms a hideous laugher began to echo down the hall. "I know someone who shouldn't be heeeere!" a voice rang out. Em yelped in surprise and grabbed hold of Dumbledore's sleeve, nearly causing the headmaster to drop the tray of food he was carrying. Dumbledore never flinched.

"Peeves!" he cried, his voice feeble in comparison. "Show yourself!"

A very strange looking creature floated up from the floor. Em knew from the books that Peeves was more or less harmless, tending to the lesser side, and that she would be fine as long as she was with Dumbledore, but she had never seen a creature quite like Peeves and was rapidly succumbing to irrational fear. Peeves began to roll around in the air as he cackled at them.

"What do you want, Peeves?"

"I know someone who shouldn't be heeeere," Peeves repeated. He stopped spinning and abruptly shouted, "You!" His arm shot out towards Em and she recoiled.

"Eep!"

"Begone and cause no more trouble today!"

"Peeves is not causing trouble, Peeves is helping. Peeves knows something Fumbledork doesn't! Ahahaha! Does Headmistress want to know what it is? Hmm?"

"Not particularly," Dumbledore muttered, causing Peeves to break out in more peals of laughter.

"Peeves will tell Dumb-elf-dork, yes? Peeves had heard something! Something good, something juicy, something important! Something to tell the Ministry of Magic! For it is so big Peeves cannot keep it to himself!"

"Get to the point!"

"Peeves has heard the girl and the nasty potions professor talking, and Peeves knows that the girl is not supposed to be here. Peeves has seen her teleport inside Hog-farts! Ohoho!"

Em had regained her composure and was on the offensive now. "Don't be silly, no one can apparate inside Hogwarts. Everyone knows that."

"But Peeves has seen this! And Peeves knows, yes, Peeves knows..."

"Oh, shoo," Em said, waving her hand at Peeves. "You're just annoying. You don't really want to bother us, do you?" Though she spoke dismissively, there was a wavering hint of uncertainty in her voice.

A moment passed, Peeves face suddenly growing confused.

"No," Em continued, "you want to go bother that Draco Malfoy fellow's friends, Crabbe and Goyle."

Peeves shot off like a rocket, presumably to wherever Crabbe and Goyle were.

"Most impressive," Dumbledore remarked. "I saw no magic."

"Oh, it's not magic, really. You just have to know how to talk to creatures like that! It's, uh, kinda a talent I have for getting points across."

"Like the point you 'got across' to Severus at the dinner table?"

Em's mouth fell open. "Urgh," she gurgled, unable to come up with a reply.

Dumbledore quickly realized he would be unable to get anything from her at this moment in time. "We should keep moving or the food will get cold," he conceded, and they went on.

Whatever spring had been in Em's step at the beginning of this adventure had all but disappeared now. Her feet dragged all the way to Professor Snape's office door. Dumbledore motioned for her to be quiet a moment as he knocked on the door with his elbow. "Severus?" his voice rang out, sounding very much like the peals of a church bell.

(Odd, thought Emperial. She so rarely made positive church comparisons in her mind.)

"Go away!"

"Severus, do open the door. My hands are tied at the moment."

At that moment there was a cry of some sort and Snape rushed for his door. "Albus, I didn't realize--" His eyes fell on Em. "You."

"This young lady and I have brought you some food. The lady's idea, I must add. Might we come in?"

Snape looked like he would very much have liked to throw them both out--out the window, that is. He snarled but stepped aside to allow Dumbledore to pass. Em followed sheepishly on the Headmaster's tail.

"Professor, sir, I'm sorry. I just wanted to say that. I shouldn't have been so forthcoming with my opinions. It was rude of me. Please accept my apologies?"

"And why should I?"

"Because--Because I'll be really sad if you don't!" she blurted. Her voice quickly lowered. "Then again, you'd probably like that, wouldn't you? It'd make you feel that much better for having made me feel worse. So I guess you don't really have to. Whatever makes you happy."

Why, her nerve. Whatever made him happy! Neither option seemed particularly appealing now, so he chose a third and ignored her apology completely. "Well, don't just stand there in the door, come in or go out!"

Looking moderately happy, Em ducked her head and scurried for the tray on the table, removing from it the bowl with the pomegranate. Dumbledore had already seated himself in a chair and was munching on a bag of cheese doodles he had produced from somewhere in the recesses of his robes.

Snape had to admit that the food did look good. He couldn't remember the last time anyone had brought him something like this. (It involved his mother, though, which meant he didn't care to try and remember at all.) Noticing Snape hadn't moved from the door, Em gave him a pleading look and motioned to his chair, in front of which the tray of food was resting. Snape reluctantly returned to his desk and sat. He even picked up the spoon and began to sip at his soup.

"Well, Severus," Dumbledore began. "Or should I say, well, Miss Atreipie, for you are the one with whom I am concerned at the moment."

Em stuck a pomegranate seed in her mouth and began to suck noisily, her curious eyes locked on Dumbledore. "Me?"

"Yes, though it does also involve Professor Snape, whose motives I must deign to question at this time."

What little progress Snape had made on the soup was stopped instantly as the Potions professor tensed.

"You both have greatly disappointed me, you in particular, Severus. I have known you but a few short hours, Miss Atreipie, so cannot say I had many expectations." Dumbledore's eyebrows were raised high in a cross between amusement and incredulity. "Is it an acceptable thing to lie to your headmaster, Severus? Or, more as I hope I am, your friend? And you, Miss Atreipie, did you honestly think your digressions would go unnoticed?"

"Urgh." Em looked at Snape for help but found none.

"Now, if the two of you would kindly explain yourselves..."

"It was me, Headmaster, not Professor Snape! It was all me! I thought it'd work, though..."

Quietly, Snape said, "It was stupid to think you could outwit Albus Dumbledore."

Em suddenly found herself faces with two hostile authority figures. "Yes, it was, wasn't it?" she stammered. "But I had to try! I can't leave, not now, you know that! And I know you know, because I know you heard me back when I was Speaking to you. And..." Her voice grew soft. "And I know you don't like me, Professor, but still, I only wanted to help. I had the best intentions."

"Forgive me," Dumbledore interrupted, "but what is the problem at hand here and what does it have to do with what Peeves said?"

"Peeves?" Snape echoed.

"Yes, he--he saw us. Or saw me, at least. When I first arrived here. And he said as much to Pro--Headmaster Dumbledore in the hallway."

Dumbledore leaned forward. "Young lady, it is extremely dangerous to teleport to and from Hogwarts, and I must know how you did it for the safety of the students. In addition, I'm afraid I must report you to the Ministry of Magic."

"Oh, but I didn't--I mean, you're worried about Harry and Voldemort, right? Well, you don't have to be. I can't, er, Voldemort can't do what I did. Not in here at least. You can't synchronize in your own dimension. And he can't leave and re-synch into a different location, so you really don't have to worry about it. And, in fact, he probably can't leave at all, not in the way I cam. I'm the... uh, the kwee-sah haddera or something like that. That's what Paul said, anyway. Well, I guess it's something all people can do with training, since Kancho can do it, but I've been gifted with the ability to facilitate resonancy change. Um, er, that's not helping... or was it my ability to maintain a sub-pocket dimension? I don't really remember now. But the important thing is you have no reason to be afraid because I'm not a security threat. I'm not doing something most people can do, and I'm sure you won't find any more people popping into your Hogwarts through portals since it's really my Hogwarts, too. It's the one I have dimensionality to."

If Snape could have laughed without offending Dumbledore, he would have. Instead, he relegated himself to the sipping of his soup and smiling behind his sleeve so Dumbledore wouldn't notice.

"My dear, I haven't the slightest idea what you're talking about," Dumbledore finally said after a long pause. Em rolled her eyes in exasperation.

"Professor, do you have a sheet of paper? Here, may I use this one?" She lifted a sheet from his desk without bothering for him to answer, similarly liberating a nearby magical quill. "Okay, it's like this." She drew a circle in the center of the page. "Here's home--my home, reality." Then she drew a larger circle around it. "This is my subconscious, unconscious, whatever. The thing that makes all life divine in a way. Now these," and she drew a variety of smaller circles intersecting the outer circle of the mind, "are other dimensions like your. This," and she drew an X mark in the middle, "is my physical, corporeal being. It can't move anywhere. But my mind can, since it's really the part that is me, not my body. It's this whole big circle, see? And it intersects all these other circles. Here's Hogwarts, and here's the Empire where Kancho and EmileAmai and Milly are from, and here's... Here's home, the one I make for me and my family. Not my body family--my mind family, the consortium of being drawn together by similar mental threads. See, everyone has an above-conscious, a mind that can access the other places, and these can intersect mine, but it's not corporeal travel, it's mind travel. But energy and matter are the same thing! It's all these tiny strings that make up the atoms..." Inside each of the circles on the outside her home dimension she drew more circles. "These are the corporeal dimensions. Now, we can't travel corporeally anywhere in our own dimension that we aren't already, because we're stuck in our dimension. But we can use our minds to split or fragment ourselves up into many pieces, and then use them, a part of ourselves, to visit other places. Only, it's all tempered by our mind-spirit that determines the universe."

The diagram was helping. Now Snape was beginning to understand what it was she was explaining. Dumbledore was nodding every few moments and mumbling encouragement for her to continue.

"Now, there's a reason that I say this is my Hogwarts, My mind can only comprehend so many dimensions, one of each. So this is the Hogwarts that exists in my head and outside my dimension. It's not the same as anybody else's, it's all mine, but at the same time it's linked... well, wait that doesn't really apply here. The important thing to understand is that I'm the only one who can do what I do in this dimension because I'm the only one who can access it in this way. It's not a common dimension--and those exist--it's a specific one rooted in place by my subconscious. Subconscious determines the universe, you know. It's the concrete beneath our feet and the air we breathe. The corporeal being doesn't really matter in that respect. We're all energy. But so there are an infinite Hogwarts, this is just one. It's a good one, too, I think, only tempered by my subconscious, which I really hate, because it means I can't just run around doing anything and am bound by my own rules. I have some control, but not much. But, um, ahh... I think that's the important thing."

"Are you saying you are not of this dimension?"

"Yes, yes! That's it exactly. And that's how I was able to get into Hogwarts. I just kind of appeared here in the portal. Your magical barriers will hold firm here because the subconscious determination of rules says it will--and that's a common thing, not just something that's mine. A common subconscious throughout the universe, see? The groundwork of physics. The basic laws of the universe. That's not to say they can't be bent and broken and change in different places, just that they'll always be the same in any one place. That's really unfortunate, too, because my home dimension doesn't have any magic." She gave a long sigh at that and shook her head. "It's not important. We do still have some things, some really great things. I just wish... but I guess it's all my wishing that got me stuck here. See, my subconscious determination of the rules did something that prevents me from going directly home. I'm currently lost and unable to return. But I'm still home in a way, corporeally and consciously, I'm just partway stuck out here. You see?"

"I... think."

"I see," Snape muttered between spoonfuls of soup.

"Good, I was hoping you would, Professor. It's not the easiest thing in the world to understand, but it's there. I'd try to get it across to you directly, but I don't want to risk it because it might be dangerous. Direct mental speech is also something that requires some mastery and control and, most importantly, familiarity. And I don't think we have that yet. Especially not you, Professor Snape, and I. But... Professor... I... It's important to me to make sure you're okay, and I don't feel safe unless I've got you with me."

Snape stopped eating once again, his spoon hovering in midair. "Albus, if you will excuse us."

Every piece of headmaster's instinct told Dumbledore not to leave, but the aged wizard nodded his head respectfully. "As you wish. I can see you two have some things to talk about. Please don't make it a habit of skipping meals, Severus. Good evening."

"Good evening," chimed Em, giving Dumbledore the weakest smile imaginable. Snape didn't even bother to try. With Dumbledore now gone, Em settled back into eating her pomegranate fleshy seed by fleshy seed. "It's--it's kinda hard to explain, Professor, but I'll try."

It can't be any harder to explain than the rest of your dribble, he thought icily.

"See, I do what I do, but I do it for a reason. I don't just make a Household because it's fun, I do it because I, well, because people need something to hold on to, and because some things transcend all parts of the universe. I can't bear to see anyone in a position similar to my own, so I send this part of me, the stronger part, the part that can do what needs to be done, to go and make sure everyone is okay. And I do it because I care. Because I care about you. Best settle down, this may take a while." She dropped a handful of dry pomegranate seeds into the bowl with the husk of the fruit. "In my dimension, my home dimension, you're just a character in a book. A movie, too, now, but primarily a book. A series of books."

"Potter," Snape said suddenly.

"Yes, Potter. The books are about him. And you're in them. but you have to understand, my universe has rules, and your universe is based off the rules of a person in my universe. I'm bound to them as you are, and neither of us can change them, and among these rules there's... there's something that puts you in danger. I guess I'd better take a moment to tell you about my family."

"My family and I aren't biologically related, we're more spiritually related. Kancho, he's like my dad, and he's been with me for ten years. Even more often now since I've started experiencing a revival. The power and connectivity comes and goes. But anyway, Kancho and the group of people from his universe were once part of something called the Galactic Empire. It was what you'd call the bad guys of their story. They're good people, good men I think, but the fact is that they were on the wrong side. Like you were. But, and this is the hard part, Kancho is dead. And he's not the only one."

"I have a good friend and mentor by the name of Dinobot--don't laugh, please--and he was what was called a Predacon in his home dimension. And they were the bad guys. But he joined the good guys, the Maximals, and he served with them for a long time. Sometimes he played double agent, like you, and in the end, he--he--"

"He died," Snape finished.

"See, where I come from, you're not a person, you're a character. You're not really real there. I mean, you're real enough in your own dimension, but you're not real in mine. Just like I wouldn't normally be real in yours. Hey, maybe there's a book series about me somewhere in here. But anyway, I have one more person to tell you about: Vegeta. He was a bad guy for a long time, and he never really stopped being a bad guy, and now he's-- "

"He's dead as well."

"Ye-es. So here are three men. The first is a decent person on the bad side. The second was--is a person who was on the bad side and joined the good side. The third is a bad guy on the good side. And they're all characters in my home dimension, just like you are. All characters." A seed clanged into the bowl, followed by a solitary tear. "That's why I had to come. I'm afraid--I don't want you to die, but I can't change it if you do. That's why I have to be here, with you, here and now, in this world where normally I cannot go, and for now I cannot leave. I can't leave anyway, but I'll have to eventually. And I don't want to leave without you while you might be in danger. I just couldn't bear it if anyone else died! They're all dead--Max, Kancho, Daidai, Talos, and, oh, I don't know! But so many are dead! And I don't want to lose another person I love!" She was sobbing full-out now, this part of Em who could do what was needed. Desperately she shoved more seeds into her mouth and tore them dry with her teeth, spitting them back out as the red blood of the pomegranate slid down her chin, mangled by the salt water.

Snape was amazed, truly amazed, that anyone would go through such convoluted loops for him. Him, Severus Snape, the most despised man at Hogwarts. Even Draco Malfoy had friends. Even rats had family. He had neither of those things, not really, and yet some poor, stupid, sobbing girl from a dimension where he was just something in a book had come to see him because she was scared he might get hurt.

He never would have believed it outside of the circumstances. As it was he was having a hard time with the concept that his existence could possibly be controlled by a being in another universe.

The tears had slowed now and only the blood of the pomegranate remained. Em wiped her mouth on her sleeve. She really wasn't too terrible, now that he thought about it. Just infuriatingly annoying. And she actually did seem to have some sort of odd concern for him. That was the most bizarre part, all portals and dimensions aside. A man she had only met once before, and one whom she had known for less than an hour.

"How," he finally asked, "How can you do all this for me? You don't even know who I am."

"Ah, but I do, that's the thing! I've read all about you, it's part of the subconscious rule. And I'm naturally emphatic. Empathic? Urg, I'm not very good with words sometimes. But the point is I've read volumes about you and thought volumes about you and known you before I ever set foot in this office. You don't have that kind of relationship with me, I know. But it's like knowing someone your entire life when you make the connection. And I was right about your hair, wasn't I?"

Slowly, he admitted, "Yes."

"I don't care, though. Your hair isn't another reason for me to despise you. Why, look at my hair! I think it feels so much nicer this way, no matter what people think. I'll never understand why they all started bathing every day. It's quite unnatural. I know up here, in England and Europe and all that, they bathe less, but in America--oh, you should hear the stuff I get about not bathing every day! My own grandmother, I go up to visit her at Christmas, even though I don't really celebrate it, and she thinks I must bathe every day because it would never occur to her to think otherwise. But I don't. I hate bathing! I'd rather go without a bath for days and weeks and months. Tch, I'll never understand those people, all those damned high school girls who act like not bathing every day is the equivalent of having tuberculosis. They didn't bathe so often back in the Middle Ages, only once a month or year. And it's no business of theirs, anyway. Yich. Once in a while I'll want to bathe, of course, when something strange happens and I'm completely covered in muck or something, but not usually. And not even usually with the muck, you know what I mean?"

Snape could have laughed if he'd found the occasion to in her speech, but she spoke so quickly and without hesitation that all his energy was spent on interpreting her lightning-fast words. They weren't the empty lightning- fast words of the gossip, either; they were complex words, interesting words, meaningful words.

"But I know you're just looking for someone who'll go beyond an excuse to make fun of you," she finally concluded. Ping, ping, went the pomegranate seeds.

That one line, spoken slower than the rest, stung his mind. That had been exactly what he'd always said he was looking for.

"I hate to say it, Professor, but I'm not sure you can even recognize what one is when you see her, am I wrong? In all honesty, you're so stuck in the rut of everyone hating you and you hating them that you can't get out. I hate to say it, but it's pretty obvious. It doesn't change anything. I knew what I was getting into the first time I came here. Doug was the same way. You'll meet him later, I'm sure." She paused to wrestle with her snack. "We're all two people, Professor, one who says and does what we say and do and the other who thinks everything. I'm sure you can guess which half of Em I am. I'm the one who thinks of doing everything and making everything happen, that piece of a person normally held back by inhibitions."

"I... see." He really couldn't think of anything else to say.

"Well, finish your soup," she instructed, "and then we'll have to go get me a bed I suppose. I really am sorry, though, about making this all so sudden. I hope you'll understand that I don't have a lot of time, and I really want to make sure we understand each other before I have to leave again. I can't leave you here like this, I really can't."

She continued talking, but his ears ceased to hear and comprehend. He kept his mind on his soup instead. She spoke about her family some more, and kept mentioning a man named "Doug," saying how he and Snape were so similar. Snape would give an occasional nod or grunt to satiate her need for acknowledgment in the conversation. He was pretty sure she knew he wasn't really listening anyway.

The last thing to leave the plate was the piece of pound cake. Snape considered it for a moment (she had forgotten to bring down a knife and fork) before picking it up in his long fingers and annihilating it in three large bites.. Her words drifted back into coherency.

"...And so, you see, it really doesn't matter where I am in a way; I'll always have my Kancho, at least in part. And gods know what I might be doing right now if it weren't for his influence! Why, I'd probably be far worse than I am now."

"Are you ready to go?"

She nodded affirmatively. "After you, sir."

"It's really not difficult," he said as he rose from his chair and led her back into the hallway. "Here is my office, and there is the Slytherin House entrance." The entrance was about a thirty second walk away.

Then, of course, there was the matter of the password. Snape stood staring at the painting rubbing his chin while Em tried dearly to hold back her amusement. Suddenly the door opened from the inside, and out came a Slytherin boy.

"Hullo, Professor Snape, the boy greeted as he walked past. Snape grunted and entered before the portrait could swing close again.

If the Griffyndor Common Room had been impressive, it couldn't hold a candle to that of Slytherin, at least in Em's mind. She found the decor much more to her liking. It was darker, for one thing. The students scattered around looked up as she and Snape entered, some calling out greetings to their Head of House. Snape motioned impatiently for their collective attention.

"This is Emperial, a relation of mine. You are to give her a bed in the girls' dorm and ensure that her stay at Hogwarts is a pleasant one. Cordelia?" He waved one of the girls over. "If you will see to Emperial's lodging for the evening, I shall retire to my own rooms. And," he returned to addressing the group, "I don't want to hear of any shenanigans in the morning, do you understand?"

There was a weak chorus of, "Yes, Professor," and Snape stalked out. The girl, Cordelia, had curly red-brown hair and dulcet brown eyes. Em blinked at her.

"Emperial Teal Atreides-Piett, but you can call me Em." She held out a hand and Cordelia somewhat begrudgingly accepted it.

"Cordelia Hughes," she answered coolly.

A boy stepped up next to Cordelia. "I'm Myron Massey. Delia and I are Prefects here, so you're expected to listen to what we say, okay?"

"Sure thing," Em nodded, still looking around the room.

"Well, first things first, let's get you a bed."

Myron seemed much more personable than Delia, a fact for which Em was grateful. The two prefects led the way up a stairwell to the girls dorms, Delia checking to make sure Myron could enter, where Myron went about setting up her bed.

"There you go," Myron said cheerfully once the task was complete.

All Em could think to say was, "Thanks."

"You probably want to meet some of the others, right? I saw you up at the professors' table at dinner. You weren't there long, though, were you?"

"Ah, no, I had other matters to attend to. I would like to meet some of the others, though."

Delia just watched them, content to play sentinel. Myron led them back downstairs and to a table where some Slytherins had gathered and were playing Wizard's Chess.

"Hey everyone, this is Em. She's Snape's, ah..."

"Were kind of distant relations," Em supplied.

"Well, anyway, these are Gabriel Tardieu, Sabin Stark, Pansy Parkinson, Draco Malfoy, Vincent Crabbe, Thomas Turpin, Rebekah Purcell, and Gregory Goyle."

Draco immediately weaseled his way to the front of the group, extending his hand. Em took it and shook lightly. "So you're a relative of Professor Snape's? He's really the greatest professor here at Hogwarts. All the rest are incompetent ninnies."

"So you're Draco Malfoy? I've heard a lot about you. Yeah, well, my granddad and Uncle Severus's mother are cousins."

"I've never heard your family's name I don't think," Draco noted. A light bulb went off in Em's head.

"Oh, well, my mom's a Muggle, which is where the 'Piett' comes from."

Draco hissed under his breath.

"Of course, you'll treat me with respect, seeing as how I am the professor's guest." Draco had never withdrawn his hand from their earlier handshake, and Em used this opportunity to give his appendage a firm squeeze, causing Draco to hiss again (this time for a completely different reason). "And if you have a qualm with me, we can settle it through a duel."

"Whoa, back up here now," Myron interrupted. Em finally released Draco's hand and smiled broadly. Myron continued, "No dueling while you're here. School policy."

"Not that I'd expect you to know that," Draco snarled.

"Oh, I know the rules, Draco. That's never put it past the Slytherins to start a few duels here and there, though, has it? Off the record, of course."

"Just what has Professor Snape been telling you?" Rebekah, one of the girls still seated at the table, asked. Em giggled.

"Oh, not that, of course. I have other sources."

"Potter," prompted Draco.

"Harry?" Em replied incredulously. "No way. You wouldn't know my source if I told you who she was, anyway, so why not leave it at that?"

Of course, Pansy picked up on that immediately and suggested, "Hermione?"

"No. A girl by the name of Jo Rowling."

Blank stares answered this name, so Em just smiled again. "Like I said, you don't know her, but she knows all of you. Anyway, I'm sure we'll get along just fine, right, Draco? I'd hate to have to tell Uncle Severus that there was trouble while I was here."

"You can't blackmail us," Sabin said. Even Myron was looking nervous.

"Can't I? I'd dare say Professor Snape isn't going to complain. But don't worry, I promise I'm just about the nicest evil person you'll meet, harmless as a rat."

Draco still wasn't buying it and motioned for Crabbe and Goyle to follow him up towards the boys' dorms. He made sure Em knew she was hated as he left, giving her glares he normally reserved for Harry Potter and friends. Em just smiled and waved at him.

"You're crazy," Myron finally sighed, scratching his head.

"You bet. But we'll get along fine, I'm sure. I'm really not half as terrible as I make myself out to be." Sabin snorted and made a move on the chessboard. Em took a moment to flash him what was quickly becoming her trademark grin. "When do you guys normally go to bed here?"

"In half an hour," Cordelia said coolly. Em looked shocked.

"Half an hour? But it's only, uh--" A quick glance at her watch confirmed that its had stopped working due to magical interference, and it probably wasn't right for this dimension anyway. "Well, it's not past midnight yet, that's for sure. Man, I miss my computer! What about books?"

"The library is closed."

"Oh, not library books, I mean reading books. Fiction or fantasy or scifi or summat. I want my CD player, too."

Myron really didn't seem to know what to make of this newcomer and Cordelia stared at Em with a most dissatisfied expression. The female prefect seemed to take special pleasure in stopping Em's every attempt at playfulness.

"Hm, well, don't you have any other games? Argh, though, I don't want to play a game..."

"Do you always hold conversations with yourself?" asked Rebekah.

"Um, actually, yes. I think aloud a lot. Usually there's someone else to think with, but not today I guess. Kancho generally sits and thinks aloud with me about nothing. It's pretty fun, really. We can talk about anything and everything in the universe: philosophy, religion, politics, military strategy, dinner..."

If Myron had elven ears, they would have perked up. "Military strategy?" he repeated, eyes flashing.

"Oh, yes. My Kancho is great man, an admiral, a gentleman, and a top-notch strategist. So we sit around and talk about battle and stuff. Kancho has been in some great ones. He's lost thousands of men under his command, and saved thousands more. Why, just yesterday he was telling me about the battle of Mis'ell'prat, where he had a group of special commandos go in while the enemy's main troops were distracted with battle and the commandos blew up the entire base and managed to retrieve data the enemy had stolen from us. It was a hard mission, and one Lilem, my half-sister, was on. She's a great Je--witch. She told me the whole thing! See, they had to enter from the back..."