Stumbling Towards Contentment 5/14
By Ginny K.
See Part one for notes and stuff.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I wouldn't dream of thinking that." responded Josh as he pulled his
sweatshirt over his head.
A few minutes later Donna's clothes joined Josh's on the floor and they
tumbled on the bed together.
Later they snuggled under the comforter by the light of the candle on the
nightstand. Josh had just gotten out of the shower and was trying to get
comfortable. He was on his stomach with the blankets pulled up almost over
his head. His hair was still damp and Donna was enjoying running her fingers
through the curls at the back of his neck.
"That's nice." he mumbled as he turned his head to face her.
Donna leaned over and kissed his forehead. "Sleep." she whispered as she
pressed her hand against his cheek.
"Thought you wanted to talk."
"I do, but right now sleep is more important. We can talk tomorrow, ok?"
"Yeah. I love you."
"Love you too."
Josh leaned over and blew out the candle. With a contented sigh he curled up
next to Donna with his head on her shoulder and his arm wrapped around her
waist. Not ten minutes later he was snoring softly. Donna fell asleep
shortly after him and for the first time in a long while the entire Lyman
clan slept soundly.
By morning the temperature was above freezing and most of the snow from the
day before had melted. Josh was standing out on the porch trying to decide
if he could walk the boys to school. The sidewalks looked clear enough to
him.
"Josh, will you get back in here, you're not wearing any shoes." yelled Donna
as she passed by the front door on her way to the kitchen.
Josh picked up the newspaper and turned to go back inside. The boys were
already at the table eating cereal when he got to the kitchen.
"Dad are you walking us to school?" asked Jessie with a mouth full of Corn
Flakes.
"Yes and don't talk with your mouth full. Jake do you have basketball
practice today?"
"After school. Tommy's mom said she would drive me home."
"OK, great. I only have one class this morning and I should be home by 1:30.
What about you?" he asked as he smiled at Donna.
"I should be home by 6. You free for lunch?"
"Late lunch, after class? I'll pick you up."
"You sure?"
"Yeah, no problem, I'll take the Metro."
"Hey what about me?" asked Jessie with a true Lyman whine in his voice.
"What about you?" snorted Jake as he put his bowl in the sink.
"Jacob." warned Donna.
"Ben will pick you up after school. You can help him carry the Christmas
stuff down from the attic."
"Cool." grinned Jessie as he slid of his seat and left to go brush his teeth.
Donna watched him as he practically swaggered down the hall. She giggled to
herself. Jessie was so much like his father. His hair was blond like
Donna's but it was as unruly as his father's. He had Josh's dimpled smile
and big brown eyes.
Donna put the breakfast dishes in the dishwasher and went to check on the
boys. Fifteen minutes later she watched as the two of them and Josh set off
down the street towards school. Jessie was holding Josh's hand and Jake was
half a block ahead of them, trying not to be seen walking to school with his
younger brother and his father.
The morning flew by for all of them. Josh's class took their exam and he was
on his way to meet Donna by 1:15. He was about a block from the Capitol when
his cell phone rang. Donna didn't have time to go out and wanted him to pick
something up for lunch.
Donna was in with Billy when Josh made it to her office. He put the bag of
food on the desk and sat down in her visitor's chair. With his feet on the
corner of the desk he made himself comfortable. With her assistant trailing
behind her Donna rushed into the room a few minutes later. She gave Megan a
few instructions and then leaned down to kiss Josh.
"Hey, busy day?"
"You could say that. What did you bring me?"
"Chicken salad, cole slaw and raspberry iced tea."
"Should I even ask what you go yourself?" smirked Donna as the smell of his
cheeseburger wafted out of the bag.
"Nope. Hey, I haven't been able to eat one in a while." he pointed out,
trying to justify his choice of lunch.
"I know. It's fine. You seem to be eating better the last couple of days.
Things going down easier?"
Josh just nodded his head as he took the first bite.
"Good. So one class down, two more to go."
"Yeah. I'll be glad when it's over." said Josh softly, with the sound of
relief in his voice.
"It was harder on you than you let on, wasn't it?" Donna asked.
"Oh yeah."
"And that's part of the problem Josh. You don't let anyone know when you're
having trouble. You wait until things get way out of control. Talk to me,
talk to Ben, don't keep things quiet. That's how you get yourself in
trouble."
"I know. I just...I don't want to be a burden."
Donna put down her sandwich and leaned forward to pat Josh's hand. "You will
never be a burden, Josh."
"No Donna, what if I am a burden? What happens if I can't take care of
myself?"
"Josh that's not really something you need to worry about right now. You've
been basically fine for 7 months."
"But what if I have another stroke?" he asked as he stood up and started to
pace Donna's small office, not an easy feat with a cane in one hand and an
over-done cheeseburger in the other.
"Josh, sit down, please. We'll get through it. Just like we always get
through everything. You have me, the boys, your friends, Ben."
"Yeah Ben." muttered Josh as he sat back down and reached into the bag for
his fries.
"What's that supposed to mean? I thought you liked Ben"
"I do like Ben. He's great. He's capable, reliable, strong, sturdy, able to
leap tall buildings in a single bound." he spit out bitterly.
"Oh," whispered Donna, suddenly realizing where this portion of the
conversation was heading. "Josh.."
"Just forget I said anything." muttered Josh, cutting her off.
Donna came out from behind her desk. She reached over to wipe the ketchup
off of his face and then leaned against the front of the desk.
"Ever since the stroke...I can't...I mean... Donna, I go take the boys to
basketball and the rest of the fathers are out on the court, playing with
their kids. And there I am on the sidelines with this stupid thing." he
said, pointing towards his cane.
"Uh, Josh, I hate to state the obvious but how much basketball were you
playing before the stroke?" she asked, trying not to smile.
"So you have a point." he conceded.
"Josh, face it, you've never been able to do all those things with the boys.
And they accept that fact. It's all they've ever known. You didn't take
anything away from them. You're a terrific father. A little unconventional,
but terrific nonetheless." she grinned a she reached out to pat his knee.
"Yeah, I guess the boys don't have it so rough?" he mused.
"Josh, they've visited the White House more times than they can count, they
come here to the Capitol just about every week. They call the former
President of the United States, Uncle Jed. They've traveled more at their
age than I had up until I came to work for you. They've been on Air Force
One with Hoynes for God's sake Josh." she said with a big smile.
"OK, so I guess they're not exactly under-privileged."
"And if Ben can do some of the things you can't, then you should be grateful
that we have somebody."
"I know, I am grateful for all he does."
"Good, cause I honestly don't know what we would do without him. So you
could be nice to him and stop sabotaging his dates." smirked Donna.
"But those girls aren't right for him." whined Josh.
Donna just laughed, "I don't even want to think about what you're going to do
when the boys start dating."
Josh chuckled to himself and reached for the rest of his cheeseburger. He
watched with pride as Donna ate, read and talked on the phone at the same
time. When she had a break from the phone calls he said his goodbyes and
headed for home.
The next few days went by fairly smoothly. But by the time he went to his
last class on Thursday night Josh was physically and mentally exhausted.
Donna ended up taking him as Ben had headed home to New Jersey to spend the
holidays with his family. As much as they enjoyed having him around, the
Lyman clan was also happy to just be a foursome for a change.
With the boys at home with a babysitter Donna took the opportunity to do a
little straightening in Josh's office while he was giving the last exam. She
managed to make sense of most of the stuff on top of the desk by the time she
heard the tapping of his cane echoing down the hallway. Josh stopped in the
doorway and laughed.
"Having a flashback Josh?" teased Donna.
"Oh yeah, definitely."
"You ready to go Professor Lyman?"
Josh nodded and slid his arms into his coat that Donna was holding out for
him. With his backpack over his shoulder and his arm around his wife he
headed for home.
The boys were long since asleep by the time they got home. As he tried to
move towards the couch to collapse he felt Donna gently hand steer him
towards the bedroom.
"Bed Josh."
"You know, I'm a little tired tonight Donna." he replied.
With a big roll of her eyes she took his hand and led him to bed. In the
morning she got the boys off to school and left Josh to sleep. She went to
work to finish up a few loose ends before the break and was home by noon.
After searching the kitchen, the study and the family room she found Josh was
still curled up in bed, his unruly hair sticking out from under the quilt.
She smiled to herself as she toed off her shoes and went to the closet to
grab a pair of jeans and a sweatshirt. After she had changed she sat down on
the edge of the bed. Josh rolled over towards her but didn't wake up. She
brushed back his hair and kissed his forehead. He started to stir a little
and his eyes fluttered open.
"Hey, what time is it?" he asked as he pushed the quilt down a little.
"A little after 12. You ok?" she asked as she pressed her hand against his
cheek.
"Yeah, just tired, that's all." he assured her as he sat up and gingerly felt
the scar on the back of his head. The stitches had been removed the day
before. "It feels funny, what's it look like?" he whined.
Donna chuckled at him and gently parted his hair, looking at the 1-inch long
scar. "It looks fine. It looks the same as it did last night when you had
me look at it." she teased. "I'm going to get myself some lunch, want do you
want?"
"I don't know..." he replied as his voice trailed off and he sort of gestured
to his throat.
"You need something that will go down easy?"
He nodded.
"Soup?"
"Yeah. I'm just going to take a quick shower." he muttered as he headed for
the bathroom.
Donna went to get lunch ready. They ate in the family room while watching
CNN. After they were done Donna went to finish wrapping some Christmas
presents. Josh read his email and straightened out his desk until it was
time to go pick up the boys.
By Ginny K.
See Part one for notes and stuff.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I wouldn't dream of thinking that." responded Josh as he pulled his
sweatshirt over his head.
A few minutes later Donna's clothes joined Josh's on the floor and they
tumbled on the bed together.
Later they snuggled under the comforter by the light of the candle on the
nightstand. Josh had just gotten out of the shower and was trying to get
comfortable. He was on his stomach with the blankets pulled up almost over
his head. His hair was still damp and Donna was enjoying running her fingers
through the curls at the back of his neck.
"That's nice." he mumbled as he turned his head to face her.
Donna leaned over and kissed his forehead. "Sleep." she whispered as she
pressed her hand against his cheek.
"Thought you wanted to talk."
"I do, but right now sleep is more important. We can talk tomorrow, ok?"
"Yeah. I love you."
"Love you too."
Josh leaned over and blew out the candle. With a contented sigh he curled up
next to Donna with his head on her shoulder and his arm wrapped around her
waist. Not ten minutes later he was snoring softly. Donna fell asleep
shortly after him and for the first time in a long while the entire Lyman
clan slept soundly.
By morning the temperature was above freezing and most of the snow from the
day before had melted. Josh was standing out on the porch trying to decide
if he could walk the boys to school. The sidewalks looked clear enough to
him.
"Josh, will you get back in here, you're not wearing any shoes." yelled Donna
as she passed by the front door on her way to the kitchen.
Josh picked up the newspaper and turned to go back inside. The boys were
already at the table eating cereal when he got to the kitchen.
"Dad are you walking us to school?" asked Jessie with a mouth full of Corn
Flakes.
"Yes and don't talk with your mouth full. Jake do you have basketball
practice today?"
"After school. Tommy's mom said she would drive me home."
"OK, great. I only have one class this morning and I should be home by 1:30.
What about you?" he asked as he smiled at Donna.
"I should be home by 6. You free for lunch?"
"Late lunch, after class? I'll pick you up."
"You sure?"
"Yeah, no problem, I'll take the Metro."
"Hey what about me?" asked Jessie with a true Lyman whine in his voice.
"What about you?" snorted Jake as he put his bowl in the sink.
"Jacob." warned Donna.
"Ben will pick you up after school. You can help him carry the Christmas
stuff down from the attic."
"Cool." grinned Jessie as he slid of his seat and left to go brush his teeth.
Donna watched him as he practically swaggered down the hall. She giggled to
herself. Jessie was so much like his father. His hair was blond like
Donna's but it was as unruly as his father's. He had Josh's dimpled smile
and big brown eyes.
Donna put the breakfast dishes in the dishwasher and went to check on the
boys. Fifteen minutes later she watched as the two of them and Josh set off
down the street towards school. Jessie was holding Josh's hand and Jake was
half a block ahead of them, trying not to be seen walking to school with his
younger brother and his father.
The morning flew by for all of them. Josh's class took their exam and he was
on his way to meet Donna by 1:15. He was about a block from the Capitol when
his cell phone rang. Donna didn't have time to go out and wanted him to pick
something up for lunch.
Donna was in with Billy when Josh made it to her office. He put the bag of
food on the desk and sat down in her visitor's chair. With his feet on the
corner of the desk he made himself comfortable. With her assistant trailing
behind her Donna rushed into the room a few minutes later. She gave Megan a
few instructions and then leaned down to kiss Josh.
"Hey, busy day?"
"You could say that. What did you bring me?"
"Chicken salad, cole slaw and raspberry iced tea."
"Should I even ask what you go yourself?" smirked Donna as the smell of his
cheeseburger wafted out of the bag.
"Nope. Hey, I haven't been able to eat one in a while." he pointed out,
trying to justify his choice of lunch.
"I know. It's fine. You seem to be eating better the last couple of days.
Things going down easier?"
Josh just nodded his head as he took the first bite.
"Good. So one class down, two more to go."
"Yeah. I'll be glad when it's over." said Josh softly, with the sound of
relief in his voice.
"It was harder on you than you let on, wasn't it?" Donna asked.
"Oh yeah."
"And that's part of the problem Josh. You don't let anyone know when you're
having trouble. You wait until things get way out of control. Talk to me,
talk to Ben, don't keep things quiet. That's how you get yourself in
trouble."
"I know. I just...I don't want to be a burden."
Donna put down her sandwich and leaned forward to pat Josh's hand. "You will
never be a burden, Josh."
"No Donna, what if I am a burden? What happens if I can't take care of
myself?"
"Josh that's not really something you need to worry about right now. You've
been basically fine for 7 months."
"But what if I have another stroke?" he asked as he stood up and started to
pace Donna's small office, not an easy feat with a cane in one hand and an
over-done cheeseburger in the other.
"Josh, sit down, please. We'll get through it. Just like we always get
through everything. You have me, the boys, your friends, Ben."
"Yeah Ben." muttered Josh as he sat back down and reached into the bag for
his fries.
"What's that supposed to mean? I thought you liked Ben"
"I do like Ben. He's great. He's capable, reliable, strong, sturdy, able to
leap tall buildings in a single bound." he spit out bitterly.
"Oh," whispered Donna, suddenly realizing where this portion of the
conversation was heading. "Josh.."
"Just forget I said anything." muttered Josh, cutting her off.
Donna came out from behind her desk. She reached over to wipe the ketchup
off of his face and then leaned against the front of the desk.
"Ever since the stroke...I can't...I mean... Donna, I go take the boys to
basketball and the rest of the fathers are out on the court, playing with
their kids. And there I am on the sidelines with this stupid thing." he
said, pointing towards his cane.
"Uh, Josh, I hate to state the obvious but how much basketball were you
playing before the stroke?" she asked, trying not to smile.
"So you have a point." he conceded.
"Josh, face it, you've never been able to do all those things with the boys.
And they accept that fact. It's all they've ever known. You didn't take
anything away from them. You're a terrific father. A little unconventional,
but terrific nonetheless." she grinned a she reached out to pat his knee.
"Yeah, I guess the boys don't have it so rough?" he mused.
"Josh, they've visited the White House more times than they can count, they
come here to the Capitol just about every week. They call the former
President of the United States, Uncle Jed. They've traveled more at their
age than I had up until I came to work for you. They've been on Air Force
One with Hoynes for God's sake Josh." she said with a big smile.
"OK, so I guess they're not exactly under-privileged."
"And if Ben can do some of the things you can't, then you should be grateful
that we have somebody."
"I know, I am grateful for all he does."
"Good, cause I honestly don't know what we would do without him. So you
could be nice to him and stop sabotaging his dates." smirked Donna.
"But those girls aren't right for him." whined Josh.
Donna just laughed, "I don't even want to think about what you're going to do
when the boys start dating."
Josh chuckled to himself and reached for the rest of his cheeseburger. He
watched with pride as Donna ate, read and talked on the phone at the same
time. When she had a break from the phone calls he said his goodbyes and
headed for home.
The next few days went by fairly smoothly. But by the time he went to his
last class on Thursday night Josh was physically and mentally exhausted.
Donna ended up taking him as Ben had headed home to New Jersey to spend the
holidays with his family. As much as they enjoyed having him around, the
Lyman clan was also happy to just be a foursome for a change.
With the boys at home with a babysitter Donna took the opportunity to do a
little straightening in Josh's office while he was giving the last exam. She
managed to make sense of most of the stuff on top of the desk by the time she
heard the tapping of his cane echoing down the hallway. Josh stopped in the
doorway and laughed.
"Having a flashback Josh?" teased Donna.
"Oh yeah, definitely."
"You ready to go Professor Lyman?"
Josh nodded and slid his arms into his coat that Donna was holding out for
him. With his backpack over his shoulder and his arm around his wife he
headed for home.
The boys were long since asleep by the time they got home. As he tried to
move towards the couch to collapse he felt Donna gently hand steer him
towards the bedroom.
"Bed Josh."
"You know, I'm a little tired tonight Donna." he replied.
With a big roll of her eyes she took his hand and led him to bed. In the
morning she got the boys off to school and left Josh to sleep. She went to
work to finish up a few loose ends before the break and was home by noon.
After searching the kitchen, the study and the family room she found Josh was
still curled up in bed, his unruly hair sticking out from under the quilt.
She smiled to herself as she toed off her shoes and went to the closet to
grab a pair of jeans and a sweatshirt. After she had changed she sat down on
the edge of the bed. Josh rolled over towards her but didn't wake up. She
brushed back his hair and kissed his forehead. He started to stir a little
and his eyes fluttered open.
"Hey, what time is it?" he asked as he pushed the quilt down a little.
"A little after 12. You ok?" she asked as she pressed her hand against his
cheek.
"Yeah, just tired, that's all." he assured her as he sat up and gingerly felt
the scar on the back of his head. The stitches had been removed the day
before. "It feels funny, what's it look like?" he whined.
Donna chuckled at him and gently parted his hair, looking at the 1-inch long
scar. "It looks fine. It looks the same as it did last night when you had
me look at it." she teased. "I'm going to get myself some lunch, want do you
want?"
"I don't know..." he replied as his voice trailed off and he sort of gestured
to his throat.
"You need something that will go down easy?"
He nodded.
"Soup?"
"Yeah. I'm just going to take a quick shower." he muttered as he headed for
the bathroom.
Donna went to get lunch ready. They ate in the family room while watching
CNN. After they were done Donna went to finish wrapping some Christmas
presents. Josh read his email and straightened out his desk until it was
time to go pick up the boys.